A Gift of Love
by Jezebel Parks
Summary: Yoh has Anna, Ren has no one and he wants to keep it that way. However, his parents have other plans. Most kids get toys or clothes for their birthday. Ren gets something else... Rated for Language, Violence, and Sexuality.
1. The Worst Present Ever

**UPDATE – June 24, 2009: **Hello, and I bid you welcome to **_A Gift of Love_**, a Shaman King fanfic that I started way back on 2006, and is still in the process of being completed. This is a Ren/OC story, and while I know Takei seems to have chosen a canon character to be Ren's companion, this was started long before the Kang Zeng Bang edition of the manga was announced. With this in mind, there may be some contradictions in earlier chapters that couldn't be changed gracefully, though I make an effort to use Takei's newer material in later chapters. I have all the respect in the world for Hiroyuki Takei and the work of art that is _Shaman King_, but this is the story of Tao Ren and Xu Pin-Mei. Reviews and concrit are always appreciated. This fic is almost completed, and if you choose to, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I have writing it.

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter One: The Worst Present Ever**

* * *

Ren glared at the girl standing on the opposite side of the room, gritting his teeth. He had been so happy that morning, it being his 16th birthday, knowing that a celebration would be held for him. Of course the prospect of gifts had crossed his mind and excited him even more.

Yet here he was, about to lose himself in a feast of peach buns and milk, when his parents had announced that they had one last "gift" for him. He had hoped it was polish for his kwan dao or maybe even a new cape. It wasn't. They had pulled a girl out instead.

A man standing behind the girl pushed her forward, more into the light. From where he was, Ren could make out her ear-length black hair, as well as her clothes. She stood before him in a dark blue traditional orient blouse with three-quarter length sleeves and white fasteners. Simple tight shorts could be seen above her knees from under a short skirt the same color as her top. He wanted to spit.

The man, who he presumed was her father, must have expected her to continue moving forward, for he gave her another forceful push, allowing two long thin braids to come into view from under her hair. She looked back at him nervously and began taking small steps toward her recipient, not taking her eyes off the floor the whole time. Ren looked back at his parents, obviously annoyed.

"What is this?" he cried motioning to the girl before him.

His parents exchanged amused glances.

"That there, Ren, is your new fiancée," his mother said simply.

Ren's eyes widened, then went back to their cold stare. He turned back to the girl as her father nudged her forward again. She finally looked at Ren, giving him the first clear glimpse of her face. He quickly decided there was nothing especially beautiful about it. She wasn't ugly, but she wasn't a swan either. Her body contrasted with her face too greatly; her face was slightly round, whereas her body was thin.

His frown deepened. _Her body is so skinny that I could snap her in half if I wanted to. She looks malnourished. _He looked up as she took another step toward him.

"I am honored, Lord Ren," she said, bowing.

"This is Xu Pin-Mei," his father said. "She will be serving as your wife when you both become of age."

"What are you talking about?" Ren turned around, enraged. "I told you before that I may be part of this family, but I am going to walk my own path! I refuse to participate in this!"

"It has already been decided," his father replied. "You must carry on the shaman legacy of the Tao family and keep the blood pure, and that is why the engagement between you and Pin-Mei has been arranged."

His son looked back over at her. She had once again taken to looking at the ground with her hands folded in front of her. When she noticed his gaze she looked up again, her cheeks flushed. He knew that there was nothing he could do to get rid of the girl at this point in time, so he relented only so that he could finally have the birthday feast he had been looking forward to.

"Escort her to the dining room," his father commanded.

Ren again showed his disapproval of the situation, but the adults passed him, his fiancée only moving after her father had passed her. She stopped in front of him allowing him to notice that he was nearly a foot taller than her.

"I'll play along for now, but know that we are not getting married," he said coldly as he turned to walk into the dining hall. She followed and passed him as they entered.

"Of course not," she whispered. "Who'd want to marry an arrogant brute like you?"

By the time her words had registered in his head, she had already sat down next to the head of the table, the seat he would be sitting in. Part of him thought he had imagined it. She had acted so timid before. Blushing even. What happened?

He didn't take his eyes off of her as he took his seat. As they ate, they'd catch each other's eye, and she'd smile sweetly, making him even more confused.

As he finished a bottle of milk, he looked to the basket the other bottles were kept in. There was only one left. As he reached for it, a quick hand snatched it away. After staring at the empty basket for a few moments, his hand still outstretched, he looked up to see Pin-Mei taking the cap off. His rage built as she removed the inner covering, acting as if nothing had happened. With a shaking fist, he was about to yell at her when she handed him the bottle.

"Here."

Again, he was frozen in mid-motion. She was smiling again. He was beginning to really hate that smile. From the corner of his eye, he noticed that the entire table was watching them.

"Darling, aren't they so cute? They're getting along already!" he heard his mother cry.

He was more puzzled than he had ever been in his sixteen years of living. He _knew_ she was just trying to trick him, and he wasn't going to fall for it. He would be civil, but he would _not_ be deceived by this girl.

When he had snapped back to reality, he saw that she had placed the bottle near his left hand, despite the fact that she was sitting on his right. Her face was red again. He just wanted this day to end, even if it was his birthday. He just wanted her to leave.

When dinner had ended, Pin-Mei rose and collected all the dishes, as well as Ren's empty milk bottles that had gathered around him, and put them near the sink to be washed.

_At least she'll be leaving soon_, he thought.

"We'll have to have a similar banquet when Pin-Mei's birthday arrives," his mother commented.

"Ah yes," En agreed. "When is that again?"

"Not until the twelfth of July," her father replied. "She will be fifteen at that time."

_Fifteen!_ Ren thought. _No wonder she acts so childish—she's a year and a half younger than me!_

When she returned, their parents turned to them.

"Ren, darling, please take Pin-Mei up to her room."

Inside, Ren wanted to scream. She was STAYING here? For how long? Never mind that. Just why was she here at all? If he had to be engaged to someone, could they have at least picked someone his age? Or at least within his maturity bracket?

They went up the stairs in silence. He looked back to see her looking at her feet, a small smile on her face. How annoying.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked coldly.

"Nothing really," she replied as he opened the door to her room. "It's just nice to see you again, Niisama. Goodnight." She smiled as she closed the door.

Ren just stared at it. "Bason."

His spirit appeared next to him. "Yes, Bocchama?"

"Have you seen that girl before today?"

"Yes, Bocchama."

Ren smirked as he turned to walk toward his own room. "Enlighten me."


	2. Koi Koi Koi

**Notes: I know he's Chinese, but I'll still be using Japanese honorifics and such, because I don't know Chinese, and therefore am unfamiliar with any honorifics they have and how they are used.**

**"koi" is a Japanese word with many meanings. It can mean "carp", "love/tenderness", "request", and many other things.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga Shaman King and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Two: Koi Koi Koi**

* * *

"Play nice, you two," Ran called from the door.

"Yes, Mother," her son grumbled as he looked at the small girl standing next to him.

"Ren-Niisama! Come play with me!" she cried tugging lightly on his hand.

He glared at her and shook himself free. "I don't have time for your childish games. I have to train with Bason." He turned and began walking away.

The little four year-old gave a few whimpers, then began to cry, her volume getting so loud that the six year-old she was with had to cover his ears. He quickly ran over to her and covered her mouth.

"Silence, you little pest!" he growled, and she obeyed. He rolled his eyes and sighed before removing his hand. "Fine, I'll indulge you for a little while, but that still doesn't change the fact that you're a pest."

She didn't seem to hear the last part. Her eyes lit up and she grabbed his hand once more as she ran toward the koi pond on the far side of the yard. She knelt at the water's edge in her silk navy blue pants and blouse, peering into the cloudy water at the plethora of fish swimming around before her. Ren stood behind her in a silk yellow top and black pants, his arms folded and looking around, obviously bored.

_Why am I always the one that has to entertain people?_ he thought.

It _was_ always him. His parents frequently invited people over so he could demonstrate his shaman abilities. After a while, he got sick of it. Just like how he was sick of the little worm in front of him.

"Hey, Niisama, can I feed them?" she asked.

He took a sack off a hook on a nearby tree and threw it at her. "Go crazy." When he saw her intently feeding the fish he slipped away to another part of the yard. Bason followed him in spirit ball mode.

"Bocchama, are you sure it's alright to leave her alone?" he asked, careful not to anger his master.

"I was alone at that age so I don't see why she can't be too," he replied. "She can't get into any trouble where she is now."

He stopped in a clear part of the yard and began going through his martial arts forms. He was about to move onto his eighth form when he thought he heard a splash. Bason appeared in front of him moments later.

"Bocchama! The young mistress has fallen into the lake!"

"What?" he cried, turning to look behind him. He could almost see her little arms flailing about. _Then again_, he thought, _I didn't want her around from the start._ He almost resumed his pose when his own voice came into his head.

_Why is everyone dead? Why are humans so dirty?_

"Ren-Niisama!"

He flinched. He'd seen enough dead people to last a hundred lifetimes, and despite the fact that he may not have thought too highly of the little brat it would be one more dead body he'd have to see. For his own selfishness, he didn't want that.

He threw off his shirt and bolted for the pond. When he got there, she was barely keeping herself above water. His body was frozen as he stared at her. She started going under. Without another thought, he kicked off his slippers and jumped into the water.

Bason watched and waited for his master to resurface, cursing himself for not having a physical body. Ren came up a few moments later with the small girl in his toned arms, panting. He sat on the stone around the pond, still holding her. She choked a couple of times, then began crying, but not as loud as before, partially due to the fact that she was against his chest. Every so often she would sob "Niisama…", but he remained unaffected by her words, holding her only enough so that she wouldn't fall. Her small ponytails tickled his hands, but he refused to show any emotion.

She unexpectedly clutched his back, causing him to let out a small sound of confusion.

"H-Hey! Sto-"

"Thank you Niisama!"

He looked at her. She was smiling that stupid smile again, even though her eyes were still red from crying.

"If Niisama hadn't saved me, I wouldn't be here right now. Thank you!"

He put her on the ground, mumbling a "You're welcome", and began walking back to where he had been before the incident. Out of the corner of his eye he could see her following him. He ignored her.

As he got into a stance he noticed that she had gone to sit on one of the rocks. At least she wasn't going to bother him. It was weird for him to have someone watching him as he trained. She didn't speak at all, just silently watched him for the two hours that he stayed out there. When he finally decided to go in and began heading towards his house, she didn't move.

He rolled his eyes and turned to her. "Come on, brat, we're going in."

Although the sun was setting, he could see her face light up. "Okay, Ren-Niisama!" She jumped off the rock and ran to catch up with him. He sighed again.

"Stop calling me Niisama. I'm not your brother."

Her face twisted in thought. "Okay, Ren-Pyon!" she said finally.

He sighed. "That's even worse. Fine, just call me whatever you want. I don't care anymore."

They walked in silence for a few moments. Just as he began to enjoy it, it was broken.

"Ne, Niisama?"

"What?"

"Can I have a Bason?"

The spirit and his master stopped. "What are you babbling about? You can't have Bason. I've had him since I was an infant. He's been in our family for generations."

"But…But…Jun has one. I want one too!"

"Jun has Pyron, not Bason. Plus, he's a doll, not an integration spirit."

"I want a spirit!"

He made a disgusted face and kept walking. "Ask your father for one. It's not my responsibility." She waddled after him.

"He won't give me one!"

"Well, there you go. Nothing I can do."

Pin-Mei stopped where she was and started crying again. "But I want one too!" she wailed. Ren whirled around and glared at her with dagger-like eyes.

"Stop acting like such a spoiled brat! Honestly! You're so annoying! Now I wish I had let you drown!"

The little girl was silent for a moment, then plopped down on the ground and cried again. He turned back around and walked quickly, eager to get far enough away from her so she could not be heard. However, that little voice inside stopped him, and he found himself in front of her again.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" he mumbled to himself. He looked down at her. She was still hiccupping tears, the little baby.

"Stop crying," he commanded. She immediately quieted down. "If you grow up a little, I'll take you to the cemetery after dinner and help you get a spirit."

She stared at him. "Really, Niisama?"

"Yeah, but only if you stop annoying me."

She stood up, a new resolve in her eyes. "Okay! I won't annoy you anymore! I promise!"

"Great…"

* * *

"Hey, Niisama? What are you doing?"

"Lifting weights."

"Oh…What's that do?"

"Makes me stronger."

"Oh…Why do you want to do that?"

"Didn't you promise that you wouldn't annoy me anymore?"

They were in Ren's weight room - Ren on the machine, Pin-Mei just watching. Now she wouldn't leave him alone. Since he had helped her get her spirit she insisted on following him everywhere. It took all his strength not to yell at her, especially at times like this when his physical strength was being used.

"Sorry, Niisama."

"Whatever."

He got off the machine and walked to the far side of the room to retrieve a towel. It was then that Pin-Mei finally made him snap.

"Ne, Niisama, what's that picture on your back?"

For a moment, Ren was silent. In his mind's eye he could see himself strapped to a table in the torture chambers, tears in his eyes as his father carved into his back. His screamed were ignored, disregarded as weakness.

His hand clenched the towel. Suddenly, it was in shreds.

"Get out."

"What?"

"I SAID GET OUT!"

"I don't understand, Niisama! Why are you so mad?"

"Aren't you listening to me?" He snatched his Kwan Dao from a rack on the wall and turned around, pointing it at her. "GET OUT."

She screamed and ran out of the room.


	3. The Emblem

I don't have anything to say here except, "Here's chapter three!" -fanfare-

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Three: The Emblem**

* * *

The next morning at breakfast, Ren refused to look at Pin-Mei. He wouldn't allow himself to. However, he could sense her looking at him from time to time, which made him feel just a little awkward.

"Ren, darling, do you like your food?" his mother asked from across the table.

He gave her a confused look. "Yeah…I guess…" Why was she asking him this?

"Oh. Then thank Pin-Mei, she made it."

Despite himself, Ren looked at her. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze for half a second, then suddenly becoming completely entranced by her porridge. He turned back to his own food. Tricked again, but it was for the last time. He was _not_ going to let her win him over.

"I mean, it's _okay_, but I've had better even at Asakura Yoh's house," he said calmly as he took a bite.

There was a splurting sound as Pin-Mei spit back into her bowl. Her face turned red with embarrassment when she realized what she had done.

"S-Sorry…I got some caught in my throat…U-Um…Excuse me." She quickly exited the room. Ren smirked. Another point for him. At this rate she'd be begging to have the engagement annulled, and then he'd be free. He got up and headed for the weight room.

As he rounded a corner, a blade appeared before his neck. He looked over to see Pin-Mei in a black orient halter top and long skirt holding a Hanwei Dadao before her.

"How dare you embarrass me like that, Niisama," she said quietly.

It was official: this chick was crazy.

"Don't you think it's unwise for you to point that at me?" he replied calmly. "Besides, you think too highly of me to do such a thing." After looking at her grip on the weapon, he added, "Oh look, you're shaking."

"Shut up…" she whispered. "You were always so mean to me. That's why I'm giving it back to you."

"Giving what back?"

"Those horrible feelings; that negative energy you've always given me."

Ren grinned. He knew how to play with her. "Alright then, do as you will."

"What?"

"Weren't you going to slit my throat? Go on, do it."

Her hand started shaking even more. Slowly, the blade was lowered. His grin grew wider. He was about to release some more harsh words upon her, but as he opened his mouth, the sound of quick intakes of breath stopped him. He looked over to see Pin-Mei staring at the ground, her face invisible to him.

"What…" she whispered. "What do I… Niisama…what do I have to do…" She raised her head, revealing her tear-streaked face to him. "What do I have to do to make you notice me?" she finally finished. Her head drooped again.

Attention. She wanted something as trivial as attention. She had called him a brute when he had rejected their engagement. She had put a blade to his neck because he insulted her cooking. She had remembered him when he didn't bother to remember her. Now she was crying, and he, for once, didn't know how to react. It was one thing to insult HoroHoro or Ryu, or even Yoh. They were men; they could take it. Women were a different story.

As a man, it was a rule to some to never make a woman cry, though chivalry had never meant anything to him. Even so, he realized that it may have been a little harsh to insult her cooking. Women were sensitive about that sort of thing.

He walked toward her. She heard him and lifted her head, expecting him to come stand in front of her, but he opted to pass her instead. He stopped beside her.

"Thanks for breakfast," he mumbled.

He continued walking.

"Niisama…" she whispered. Her eyes welled up with tears again. "Thank you…"

He sighed as he turned the corner. "Brat."

* * *

Later on that day, Ren was still in the weight room. He was in the middle of a water break when the door opened.

Pin-Mei peeked her head in, then entered, closing the door behind her. He glanced at her once, then threw his empty water bottle over his shoulder and went resumed his workout. She inhaled, almost as if to gather her courage, and went to lean on the wall opposite to him. There was silence except for the clanging sound of weight. It wasn't until he got up to go take a shower that she moved.

"Niisama, here's a towel." She held it out to him. He took it, but didn't look at her.

"Thank you." He turned his back to her and headed for the attached shower. She followed him.

He gripped the door handle and froze, then looked back and gave her a disgusted look. "Are you planning on getting in with me?"

Her face turned red. "N-No! Of course not!" she cried. "It's just…"

"What?" He was getting annoyed. He hated feeling dirty.

She shrunk. "Promise you won't get mad?"

"Just spit it out already!"

"Where did your emblem go?" she said in a loud voice.

He chuckled, then turned to her. "Well, isn't this a familiar scene?"

She bit her lip.

"You're expecting me to yell again, aren't you?"

No response.

"Answer me."

"Y-Yes…"

"Heh." He had to admit, she was so much fun to play with. "Well, I'm not going to."

"Y-You aren't?"

"No." He motioned to the bench press. "Sit."

She scuttled over to it and sat. He joined her.

"Have you ever met someone who completely changed your life?" he asked her suddenly.

She turned her head away from him a little, hiding a crimson face. "Y-Yes."

"I have. Asakura Yoh."

She turned back to him. "Who?"

"One of the laziest, most laid back, yet strongest people I've ever met. Asakura Yoh. I met him years ago during the Shaman fight. He was the first person aside from Jun to fully accept and understand me."

She looked away again. "I see…" _...I did…_

"He helped me save myself. I finally wasn't alone anymore. The night we both passed the preliminaries, I went to his house and met his friends. I went into an onsen for the first time in my life." He smiled. Pin-Mei turned back to him and tilted her head.

"I finally had friends. Early in the morning, though, I returned here to defeat my father and rid myself of this hatred he had sealed inside me since my birth. That emblem symbolized that hatred, and I carried it along with me all those years. I defeated my father, and that's when the emblem disappeared."

"I see..." she whispered. "That's why you were so angry when I asked…I'm sorry…"

"Forget about it," he replied getting up. He patted his face with the towel.

"I just feel bad now. I remember thinking back then…I remember thinking that it was pretty."

"I remember thinking you were an odd child," he said facing away from her. "It was creepy having you there all the time."

_Cr-Creepy? I'm creepy?_

"I got you a spirit because I thought you'd hang around her instead of with me, but you just followed me around more. I berated you every chance I got, but that didn't deter you either. I just didn't get it. As a matter of fact I still don't." He looked at her now. "Are you a masochist?"

"No, I am not!" she cried, standing up. She stopped, then played with her hands. "I just…I…you…um..."

He gave her a quizzical look. "Well, while you're learning how to speak again, I'm taking a shower." He stepped into the stall.

_No…come back…I have something to say!_

She stood tall, eyes closed tight, her face still red.

"Ren!" No answer. "Ren…The truth is…I started following you around because I-,"

The water turned on.


	4. Aquaphobia

It was hard to finally introduce Pin-Mei's main spirit, Ma Ying Taphan. I actually looked up famous female warriors (which there aren't a lot of), and finally chose Ma Ying, a leader of the female palace guards in Thailand. We're just going to pretend she was buried in China, okay?

Despite what the line may imply, Pin-Mei showers regularly.

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Four: Aquaphobia**

* * *

"I'm so stupid,"

"Do not be so hard on yourself, Mistress. It is not an easy thing to do."

"I know but I had SUCH a good opportunity! We had a tender moment- it was perfect!"

"Forgive me, Mistress, but I think he was just being tender with himself, not you."

"Yeah…I guess you're right about that."

Pin-Mei was standing at the koi pond once again, this time not with Ren but her main spirit next to her - a woman dressed in feudal China armor, but with a gentle smile. She turned to her.

"Hey, Ma Ying?"

"Yes, Mistress?"

"Was your marriage arranged?"

"Like all women of my time, I went to a matchmaker to meet my husband."

"Did you love him?"

"Yes, very much so…He died for the king, the most honorable of ways to die."

"I see…"

"Are you thinking about Master Ren?"

"What about me?"

Pin-Mei jumped as Ren came up behind her, slipping and falling head first into the water. She flailed around like ten years before.

"Niisama! Are you trying to kill me?"

He sighed. "Stand up, you fool."

She did and revealed that the water only came up to her chest. Embarrassed, she waded over to the stone platform to get out as Ren laughed at her.

"What? Did you think you hadn't grown at all since then?" He was still holding back a laugh as he spoke. She frowned at him.

"I don't know. Can you still swim?"

Before he had a chance to answer her, she pushed him in. Now she was the one laughing. "To think that the 'great' Tao Ren was defeated so easily! You left yourself WIDE OPEN!"

"Bocchama!"

"Don't worry about him Bason, he'll be fine. He was the one who saved me, remember?"

Ma Ying looked worried. "Mistress…you pushed him into the deepest part of the pond."

Suddenly Pin-Mei wasn't laughing anymore. He hadn't come back up yet. As she waited, she bit her nail and kept telling herself he was alright, but soon couldn't take it anymore. She ran to the deep end and knelt down on the stone.

"Ren!" she cried out, leaning over the water. Ma Ying floated to her side instantly.

"My Lady, please do not do anything rash! Be careful!" she warned.

But her master wouldn't listen to her. "Ren!" she called out again.

He suddenly popped up from under the water. "Pin-Mei, you idiot!" he yelled at her. A sly smile formed and he reached for her arm and tugged on it. Her eyes widened in panic.

"No, Ren! Stop it!" she pleaded.

"Ha! Like I'm going to go easy on you!" He tugged a little harder.

"REN STOP IT!" she screamed.

Her shrill voice stunned him, making him immobile for a few moments. She freed herself from his grasp and ran into the house. Ren just stared after her. Ma Ying did the same, but their expressions were horribly different.

"What was that about?" he wondered aloud. Ma Ying turned to him.

"Ren-Bocchama, you see, the mistress still cannot swim. The water terrifies her."

* * *

Dinner that night was quiet. No one said anything, not even the adults. By the end, Ren almost _wanted_ to catch Pin-Mei staring at him. She never even looked at him. Her eyes were in a fixed daze, almost as if she was asleep, awakening only to eat a bit of her rice. When everyone was done eating, she calmly and obediently placed the dishes in the sink, then walked up to her room. Ma Ying was waiting for her inside.

"My Lady, why has that incident affected you so?" she asked.

"I don't know. I honestly don't," Pin-Mei replied sitting on the bed. "Maybe that selfish part of me is upset because he didn't remember what happened."

"If you carry this around with you, you will only become more and more tired. It is best to travel with the least amount of bags that you can. Furthermore, it does not mean that he did not remember what happened."

Her mistress gave a small laugh. "It's always like you to say wise things like that," she said. She stood up. "But I suppose you're right. I can't let this get me down. If I want him to notice me, I have to smile. No one wants to be around a depressed person all the time." Her smile got bigger. "Thank you, Ma Ying. You're the reason why I don't need a mom."

Ma Ying chuckled. "Do not say such nonsense!"

"I'm going to take a shower!" Pin-Mei said triumphantly. She ran out the door.

"Ho-ho! Such spunk!" the spirit said.

* * *

"Ahh! It feels so good to be clean!" Pin-Mei exclaimed as she entered her room. She closed her eyes and did a childish twirl.

"I guess now you can see why I like it so much."

"Yes, you're ri-," she stopped. "Eh?"

There, sitting on the window sill, was Ren. Here she was, wet, and only a silk robe to cover her. She wanted to scream.

"What are you doing here, Niisama?"

"I wasn't aware that I needed a reason to come and see my guests. It _is_ my house after all."

"Yes, you're right… Sorry…"

"Stop being so timid. It's creepy."

_I'm creepy again…._

"You were a lot more interesting when you were putting that Dadao to my neck."

_NOW who's the masochist?_ "Huh?"

"I just mean that if you have to be here, you might as well entertain me."

"Oh…"

"And..." He scratched the back of his head. "I shouldn't have tried to pull you into the pool. I didn't think you'd still sink like a stone."

"It's okay." _Gee, some apology._

"Well, I'm going to bed." He got up and started walking towards her on his way to the door.

"Okay…" _Here he comes Pin-Mei, do something!_

He went to go around her, but she got in his way and wrapped her arms around him.

"Good night, Niisama," she whispered.

Ren, his arms still free, was caught between a rock and a hard place.

_What the hell? Now what's she doing? Oh God, what do I do? She'll cry if I push her away, but I sure as hell don't want to hug her back…_

He patted her head, a small smile on his face. "Good night, pest."

She looked up at him, perplexed. He froze, knowing he had done the wrong thing.

_Oh crap… Now what should I do? Honestly, this girl…_

"…That's the first time you've really smiled at me," she said beaming. _Wow, I'm so happy!_

He was surprised at her reaction, but he accepted it nonetheless. As she had her eyes closed in a happy smile, his eyes softened.

_Maybe she's not just a pest, _he thought.

He removed himself from her embrace and continued on to the door. Before leaving, an idea popped into his head.

"Hey," he said, causing her to turn around. "Meet me outside tomorrow." He grinned slyly. "Don't wear a skirt".


	5. More Fears, and Pain

In this chapter, we get to see Pin-Mei make a mistake! Oh goodness! She is not the prefectxxorz! (yes. I misspelled that on purpose) I really needed to stop making Pin-Mei look like the victim. It was getting boring.

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Five: More Fears, and Pain**

* * *

_"Ren-Niisama…"_

_He groaned. "What is it now?" he said briskly as he worked a rowing machine._

_"Remember that thing we spoke about earlier today?" the four-year-old said quietly. Her hands were behind her back and she was swinging gently from side to side._

_"What about it?" He was still concentrating on what he was doing, not even glancing at her._

_"Um…can we do it?"_

_"What did I say about the conditions for doing it?"_

_"We'd do it after dinner if I didn't annoy you."_

_"What do you think you're doing now?"_

_She looked hurt. "Annoying you?" she ventured._

_"Bingo," he said flatly. Her face fell even more. "Go cry to your mom. Like I said, it's not my responsibility to get you a spirit."_

_"My mom's not here," Pin-Mei replied quietly._

_"Then when you go home. You know what I mean."_

_"She's not at home."_

_"Well then where the hell is she, hm? Out with another man? Hope your parents aren't just dumping you on us."_

_The next thing he knew, his nose was bleeding and Pin-Mei was gone. He looked around and spotted a bloody two pound barbell on the floor near him. After putting his hand to his nose and confirming the blood factor, he angrily picked up the weight and threw it at the wall, making a hole._

_'That fucking brat!' he thought as he stormed out of the room. 'She's going to be so dead once I find her!'_

_He walked quickly down the hall in search of the little girl. When he rounded a corner, he bumped into his mother. He almost just passed her, continuing on his way, but…_

_"Ren, come here."_

_He turned, about to tell her that he was busy, but was met by a harsh hand. His face burned, a sensation almost foreign to his body. Stunned, and with wide eyes, he touched his cheek._

_"Mother…"_

_"That was for what you said to Pin-Mei. You should know better," she said in a calm voice. "You and Jun are lucky to have had me all your lives, but she has not been as fortunate."_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"Xu Hua, her mother, died shortly after giving birth to her. What do you think life is like for a child with no mother, and with a father who has so many women at his beck and call? Are you aware of the backlash a child receives from their relatives when their mother dies giving birth to them?"_

_She began walking away._

_"You think about that, Ren." Soon, she was out of sight._

_As the warm stinging on his cheek faded, so did his anger. Despite the fact that she was nothing but a bother to him, it was clear that he had gone a little too far. It was then that he decided to go look for her. A flash of light entered from the many large windows in the hallway, soon followed by the crackling of thunder. He ignored it and went about the rooms in search of her._

_For almost an hour he searched for the little girl, but he still did not find her. Even after going back and opening all the cabinets in the house there was no sign of her. After searching the last room, he was about to give up._

_'I've even looked in the places that are too small for her to fit into… where the hell could she have gone?'_

_After another flash of lightning and boom of thunder, he looked to the nearby window, his eyes wide._

_"She wouldn't…" he whispered to himself. The rain poured down and clung to the window panes, gathering before falling to the ground. He couldn't even see out of them; they were too fogged up. What if she was out there? Unable to rule out the possibility, he turned and ran out of the room._

_Multiple times, while running down the halls, he would almost collide with a servant, but managed to dodge them. It was at times like these that made him curse his large home. There were too many places to look and halls to run down. Yet, he finally reached the hallway leading to yard._

_He ran and slammed the sliding door open._

* * *

"I see you showed up," he said with a cocky smile.

Pin-Mei was standing on the porch before him dressed as he had requested: in a shirt and shorts, no skirt. "Of course I did!" she cried, putting her hands on her hips. "What? You were expecting me to chicken out?"

He smirked. "You're going to wish you had when you find out what we're doing."

She looked at him suspiciously. "What do you mean?"

"You'll find out."

He guided her away from the yard, through a field and eventually to a lake of crystal clear water. Looking back at her, Ren could already see the discomfort on her face.

"W-What are we going to do here, Niisama?"

"Today, you're going to learn how to swim."

"WHAT?" She took a few steps back. "No way! Absolutely NO WAY! I did NOT sign up for this!" She started to run back up the hill toward home.

Ren sighed. He ran and easily caught up with her, grabbing her arm. "I'm taking time out of my day to do this, so be a little more grateful," he said in an annoyed tone. "Besides, are you saying you don't trust me?"

His question caught her by surprise. She bowed her head slightly in shame. "I…I do…"

"Alright then, let's go." He started back down the bank, then turned around and realized she wasn't following him. After a deep calming breath, he marched up to her, took her wrist, and then marched back down again. "Listen, I realize you're scared, but if you're a baby about it, it'll just piss me off. You're not four anymore so don't act like it."

Pin-Mei gave her wrist a shake in an act of defiance. "If you DID understand then you'd be a little nicer about it." A dark grin formed on her face. "Of course, considering how great you are, you've never been scared, so how would you know how I feel?" The grin faded when he looked back at her, a doleful expression on his face.

They were at the edge of the water. He made her take off her shoes while he did the same, in addition to his shirt. After taking her wrist again, he stopped before heading into the water.

"Don't think I've never been afraid," he said without looking at her. "I've had to do things although I was afraid…I'm human too, you know."

At that instant, Pin-Mei felt a deep pang in her heart. She knew then why the water had been turned on before she could confess to him. This "love" that she had for him simply wasn't deep enough. Not yet. If it had been, she would have never said something so thoughtless.

_I'll wait,_ she thought, closing her eyes. _I'll wait until I'm not a child anymore before I say it. It will mean nothing other wise._ She opened her eyes again. "Ren, I—,"

"Let's go," he said, cutting her off. "And don't be afraid. I won't let you drown."

She only nodded and made a small sound of agreement before allowing him to guide her into the water. A tear ran down her face that she quickly wiped away.

_Thank you._


	6. Spreading Her Wings

Swimming lesson - Part Deux

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Six: Spreading Her Wings**

* * *

Pin-Mei shivered. The water was freezing and she was scared out of her mind. Even though she had been thankful for Ren's kindness a few minutes ago, he was now back to his old self, and thus a ruthless teacher. He was leading her deeper and deeper into the water, until she was finally up to her shoulders.

"Okay, first thing," he announced. He let go of her wrist and waded over to stand behind her. She panicked and tried to attach herself to him, but he swiftly dodged each attempt. When he was finally behind her, he put his hands a few inches away from her waist, ready to grab her should she take to being a rock again.

"Start walking," he commanded. She obeyed after a whimper and a gulp.

When it was too deep for her feet to touch the ground, he lifted her slightly by holding her under her arms, just to keep her above water.

"Okay, kick your legs." She did. "Now do this with your arms."

He turned her around, letting go of her to show her a treading motion with his arms. She copied him. He watched her for a few moments, then folded his arms and grinned.

"Look at yourself."

She finally realized that he wasn't holding her up. "Eee!" She sunk down into the water like a stone. Ren sighed and went over to pick her up.

"Why did you stop?" he asked in a disgruntled voice.

"Why did you let go of me?" she countered.

"You'll never learn how to swim if I don't! Do you want to sink like stone all your life or do you want to be able to go into the water and not be afraid?"

"I don't want to be afraid, but it's so hard…My mind keeps picturing the worst possible thing that can happen, then I can't stop thinking about it…"

Ren let his eyes drift upward as he blew another sigh out of him. "Listen, if it helps you at all, just keep telling yourself that I'm here with you. I won't let you drown."

_Niisama… _"Okay…I'll try again."

"Alright, then." He resumed his position behind her and walked with her. Eventually, he let her go, as if she were a bird about to spread her wings and fly away.

And fly away she did. Like a penguin.

She turned and looked back at him. "I'm doing it! Oh my gosh! I'm doing it!" she cried.

In a fit of joy and accomplishment, she raised her arms up into the air, and she sank. Ren looked half concerned, but when she popped back up a moment later, his eyes softened and he smiled. She went under again, but this time didn't come back up. He swam out to where she had been and looked around. The water was darker here, so it wasn't easy to see her.

Suddenly, a strong force pushed down on his back and he went under. When he came back up, Pin-Mei was giggling.

"I got you!" she teased.

"That's really impolite, you know," he said, coming towards her. "We punish impolite people in my house. Severely."

"Hm?"

He took his hand and put it on her head. Before she could react, he dunked her under the water. She came back up coughing.

"You jerk! That was mean!"

"It isn't so great when the shoe's on the other foot, is it?" He gave her a sly grin. She was staring at him. The grin disappeared. "What?"

She waded over to him. "I just noticed…When your hair gets wet, your tongari goes away." Her hand went to touch the fallen hair, but he turned away.

"Yeah, it does that," he said, getting out. "We'd better go, the sun is setting."

She turned to confirm what he said. "Yeah, you're right."

When she joined him, he handed her shoes to her. She shivered.

"It's so cold out here."

"That's because you're all wet," he observed. "I brought towels here beforehand. Go wrap yourself in one."

They started walking back to the house. Pin-Mei was startled when another towel was draped over her shoulders. She looked to Ren, who was walking without one.

"Aren't you cold?" she asked.

He shrugged. "I can take it. No big deal."

She tried to hold back an inevitable blush. "Um…Niisama?"

"What?"

"Thank you."

He shifted his eyes toward her, then closed them as they continued walking. "You're welcome."

* * *

That night, Pin-Mei sat on the bench and watched Ren work out again. It amazed her that despite their activity that day he still had the energy to lift all that weight. She, on the other hand, was ready to turn in for the night.

Ren had his back to her, working the rowing machine.

"Hey," he said. She made a small sound in reply. "I'm planning on visiting my friends in Japan soon and I figure I might as well bring you with me." She didn't say anything. "I have a timeshare over there, so we wouldn't be staying in some third-rate hotel. Asakura Yoh is there, so you can meet him and the rest of his friends. Plus there's a lot to do there, and since it's winter we can see the snow there too. How does that sound?"

No reply. "Are you listening, brat?" He turned around to make sure she had been paying attention, but instead found her sleeping on the bench, her head resting against the wall. He sighed and shook his head. "Honestly…"

Ren stared at her for a few moments, taking in the sight before him. She looked so innocent as she slept. A small smile was on her face, as if to tell him she had liked his proposal. He walked over to her and bent down to bring himself to her level. Gently, he brushed a stray hair out of her face, then smiled.

"Alright, I'll take you there."


	7. Snow, Roses, and Butterflies

Today, Children, we are going to pretend that it doesn't snow near Ren and Pin-Mei's houses. Work with me here.

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seven: Snow, Roses, and Butterflies**

* * *

"Oh my gosh! Look at this stuff, Ren! It just keeps falling! Eee! One fell on me! It's so cold!"

Ren watched from the front steps of the Asakura home as Pin-Mei ran around in circles like a little child, enchanted by the falling snowflakes. Yoh came out and handed him a mug of hot cocoa.

"She's cute, the way she acts I mean," he said to his guest.

"Yeah…maybe…" Ren replied, taking a sip of his cocoa. "I apologize that she never really introduced herself. She's never seen snow before."

"Don't worry about it." He smiled. "I just think it's nice that you're warming up to someone who lives closer to you."

Ren spit out what he had just drank, pink in the face. "I am NOT warming up to her," he asserted with a stern voice. "She is merely a fiancée chosen for me by my parents, and I am obligated to get acquainted with her because of that."

"If you say so…" He was still smiling.

"Listen you-,"

BAM!

Ren was stopped in mid-sentence by a well aimed snowball. As the snow slowly fell from the side of his face, he looked to a very scared Pin-Mei, her hands covering her mouth.

"Niisama! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hit you in the face! I was aiming at your body!"

"Excuses won't help you," he said in a malignant tone. He put down his mug and stepped off the porch toward her.

"Hey! Wait a second, Ren!" Yoh cried as he also left the steps. "How about letting her off this one time, ne? She didn't mean to."

"Silence, Yoh! She needs discipline." He bent down, rolled up some snow, and patted it in his hands. "Take this, you little pest!" He tossed it at her. It hit her left arm.

"Eee! It's so cold!" she squealed.

"You better get ready because another one's coming for you," he warned.

She squealed again and ran behind a tree. He chased her, only to find that she was waiting for him, snowball in hand. She grinned evilly and threw it in his hair, then started to run away, giggling. Not to be outdone, Ren grabbed another handful of snow and stuffed it down her back.

"Hey! No fair!" she cried as she collapsed onto the ground. "No skin, no skin!"

"All's fair in love, war, and snowball fights," he said with a grin.

Yoh smiled as he watched them from the steps. _He may not admit it, but he's having fun._ "Hey, you two! It's time for dinner!"

"Okay!" Pin-Mei piped before Ren could even look back.

He watched Ren offer Pin-Mei his hand, helping her up when she offered her own. Ren calmly walked into the house. Pin-Mei followed, but stared at her feet, her cheeks the same shade of pink that her fiancé's was a few minutes before.

* * *

The next day, as the snow began to melt, Ren escorted Pin-Mei around Tokyo, pointing out various things and allowing her to explore a bit. At her request, they walked around in a nearby mall. She peered into the windows at the unusual styles of clothing.

"This stuff is a little weird," she commented.

"Well, some people like it."

"Why would someone want to dress like a doll?"

He shrugged. "I don't dress like that so I wouldn't know."

She giggled. "Yeah, I can't exactly imagine you in a dress." She saw another window and pressed herself against it. Her eyes lit up as she admired the clothes inside. Excited, she turned to Ren. "Can we go inside? Pleeeeease?"

He thought for a moment.

Girls, plus clothes, equals hours of boredom.

Then again, if he told her it was time to go she'd probably listen. He decided to risk it.

"Alright, but only for a few minutes," he said finally.

"Yes! Thank you!"

She skittered through the doors and began examining the various designs. She looked around for a few minutes, then stopped in front of a mannequin.

He had been standing behind her the whole time. It was almost cute. She was just standing there gawking at an outfit, seemingly too awed or too scared to touch it.

"Do you want to try it on?"

She jumped as if she had forgotten he was even there. "Yeah," she said quietly.

He waved over an employee, who led her to a dressing room. A few minutes later, she emerged in her regular clothes. He gave her a curious look.

"What happened?"

A slight trace of sadness was in her eyes. "Oh… it doesn't fit, and they don't have the size I need… so that's that." She forced a smile. "They're just clothes. No big deal. Let's go."

She hid her face and walked past him and out of the store. He caught up with her and grabbed her wrist. "Hey, why are you acting so upset?" he asked. When she turned to look at him, he was taken aback for a moment but quickly rebounded. "Why are you crying?"

She sniffled a couple times. "It's just always like this," she said. "Just because I don't have a big chest, it's so hard to find things that fit…I'm just so sick of it!"

Again, Ren was stunned. He had never interested himself with her body and therefore never looked at it. It was an awkward situation to be in. Her crying was annoying, to say the least, but telling her to be quiet wouldn't do anything. He looked around spotted two stores, a light bulb went off in his head.

"Pin-Mei, why don't you go into that store over there?" he said pointing to a store named _Cospa_.

She looked slightly reluctant. "Why? Where are you going?"

"I just remembered that Jun wanted me to buy her something at one of these stores. So just go in there and wait for me, alright?" Despite his good intentions he consciously used a stern tone.

She glanced at the floor. "Alright…"

He watched her walk in, just to make sure she didn't run off or get picked up, then walked hurriedly in the opposite direction.

* * *

About fifteen minutes later he met up with Pin-Mei in the store.

"This is a neat store," she said smiling. Just as he had hoped, it had helped her get the recent event out of her head. She turned to him. "What _is_ all this stuff?"

"It's called cosplay," he replied. "People dress up like characters from the cartoons here and have parties…or something like that."

She blinked. "Weird," she said.

She picked up a pocket watch and looked at it curiously. She opened it to reveal the face and gasped. "Niisama! Someone carved something on the inside of this watch!"

He looked over her shoulder. "I think it's supposed to be like that."

"Really? That's so weird!"

He shrugged. "It isn't weird to the people who buy them." But she didn't hear him. She had already moved on to the jewelry.

"That's one's so pretty!" she exclaimed pointing to a pink ring with the image of a rose imprinted on it.

"It's time to go," Ren said looking at him watch.

"Aww…"

"Go on, I'll be out in a second."

She walked out and stood outside for a good minute before he joined her. "What took you so long?" she asked.

"That's none of your concern. Come on, let's go home."

* * *

After dinner, Ren caught Pin-Mei before she was able to involve herself in anything. He stood with his back to a couch, her facing him.

"Close your eyes," he said.

She did. He waved his hand in front of her to clarify that she couldn't see anything.

"Hold out your hands."

When she did this, he took a small box from his coat and placed it between her hands, allowing her to cup the box. He grinned slightly at the quizzical look on her face. As a final touch, he removed the lid.

"Alright, open."

Pin-Mei opened her eyes. Before her, in the box, were two small butterfly hair clips with purple gems in them. Whether they were real or not was yet to be seen but it was all the same to her. Across from her Ren watched her eyes light up at the sudden gift. She looked at the clips, then him, then the clips, then back to him.

"These are beautiful…but why?" she asked, practically breathless.

He grinned again, as if this were part of a plot. "I figured I could get you something where you wouldn't have to worry about the size." She was just staring at him. "Well, are you going to put them on, or just gawk at me like that?"

"Oh!" she said as if the idea had never occurred to her. She placed the box on the table and attached each clip to the bottom of her braids.

"Well?" he said.

She just looked at him again, trying to keep herself under control. Finally, she gave in. She launched herself at him, knocking him down onto the couch in a tight hug.

"Thank you so much…" she said as she began to cry again.

"No problem," he replied as if he had just picked something up off the floor for her. He pushed her off and walked toward the bedroom door. "It's time for bed."

She nodded. "I'm going to take a shower then." Before she went into the bathroom, she looked back at him. "Thanks again, Ren." She was smiling.

He gave a small smile back and went into their room. The two beds were separated by a nightstand. He thought about how he had acted when he found out she was his fiancée and how he was acting now. He looked at his reflection in the mirror before him.

"What am I doing…" he asked himself.

He sighed, closing his eyes. Opening them, he looked at himself again.

"Are you really the same Tao Ren that sliced a car in half…that once fought Asakura Yoh with an intention to kill?"

He closed his eyes again. A soft-eyed smile appeared this time upon opening them again.

"Yeah, I am," he said. He looked to the bathroom door.

"I'm just not alone anymore."


	8. Together Till the End of this chapter

It looks like my little notes keep getting shorter. They aren't all that important anyways.

I recently realized that Pin-Mei has cried in just about every chapter since chapter two. It's a wonder she's not dehydrated. She's not a cry baby... she's just…sensitive…

For anyone who may be wondering, the last flashback was left unfinished for a reason. You'll find out what happens, promise.

Okay, as a child, Pin-Mei is going to be talking about things that are semi-heavy. "What?" you say, "four year-olds can't talk like that!" Nay I say to you! NAY! If Ren can be two and talk about dead people, then Pin-Mei can be four and talk the way she does. (I don't know if Ren really was two, he was just ultra chibitized).

**Disclaimer: I still do not own Shaman King, so stop coming to my house and demanding that I rent out Ren's sexy bod to you for a night. You probably wouldn't pay enough anyway.**

**Note: The first part of this chapter is another flashback.**

**I may make Ran a little too nice, but I've always been under the impression that she is actually a nice person who loves her family, and that she only allows En to torture their children because she frankly does not have a choice in the matter.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eight: Together Till the End (of this chapter)**

* * *

_"Ren-Niisama!"_

_Ren looked back. His eyes widened in alarm as Pin-Mei ran toward him, a large wild dog on her heels. He took a Bo staff from the weapon rack on the wall and stepped in front of her. She ran behind him and clung to his leg until he shook her off. He glared at the large brown animal and readied himself._

_The dog growled and bared its teeth. Saliva dripped shamelessly from its mouth as he eyed the small girl behind its opponent._

_"Come on, you mangy mutt," Ren taunted._

_It growled once more before leaping at him. Ren swung his Bo and hit it into the bushes. He watched them closely, waiting for the creature to emerge._

_The leaves beside Pin-Mei rustled. Suddenly, the dog leaped out to attack her._

_"Shit!" Ren ran toward her and shielded her, accidentally exposing his body. It wasn't until the pain hit him that he realized his fault._

_The dog had sunk its teeth into his left side, nearly crushing his ribs. He screamed and batted the animal off of him. Before it could attack again Ren grabbed his Kwan Dao and brought it down on the animal, killing it instantly._

_He stared at the now motionless beast, breathing heavily. His pupils dilated as he struggled to remain standing. He coughed into his hand. When he saw it covered in blood he glanced over his shoulder at the girl he had saved, a tired glare on his face._

_"Stupid brat…"_

_He fell to the ground. Pin-Mei ran and knelt down beside him._

_"Niisama!"_

_She waited for him to open his eyes. He didn't. She shook him lightly._

_"Niisama!"_

_Nothing. She was getting frantic. Her mind could hardly grasp what was going on. She shook him harder._

_"Niisama! Niisama!" she screamed._

_Still no response._

_"No…Please don't go, Niisama…please…Ren…don't leave me alone…"_

_She leaned over the body and cried harder than she had ever remembered crying before. It was all her fault and she knew it. There was nothing she could do. She didn't want to leave his side to get help, but she didn't want him to die either._

_Just when she was about to abandon all hope, Bason appeared. He noticed his fallen master instantly._

_"Bocchama!"_

_Pin-Mei looked up. "Bason! Bason, please! Help Ren!" she pleaded._

_The spirit nodded. "I will alert the house," he said, and vanished._

_Pin-Mei tried to calm herself, knowing that help was on the way. She looked at Ren's face, which was now serene, not showing any hint of pain._

_His right hand, which lay beside his face due to his arm being bent, was still red with blood. It was all she could see at that moment. It was the thing she wanted most from him. She wanted to hold it, even for just one second. But she knew she would never get it. Unless…_

_She swallowed and reached for his hand. When she touched it, she pulled back slightly, as if she were flinching, but picked it up and cupped it in both her hands—right on bottom, left on top._

_Her fear of blood would have otherwise deterred her from doing such a thing, but her anxiety faded as she took in the moment. His hand was so large and warm compared to hers. This was the feeling she had wanted- the warmth, the serenity, the utter happiness that she felt right then. She knew this wouldn't last forever, but she still kept the hope alive of something like this happening again._

_She heard running from behind her. She looked over her shoulder to see Jun and some servants running towards her._

_"Ren!"_

_Jun knelt down and hurriedly turned her brother over onto her lap. Tears fell from her eyes as she surveyed his body, never looking away from the gash on his side. She glared at Pin-Mei. "What happened here?" she asked in a dark voice._

_The child cowered. "T-There was this big dog," she pointed past Jun to the fallen beast, "and it was chasing me and Ren picked up the stick and hit it over into the bushes but it jumped out to eat me but Ren protected me but the dog bit him so Ren killed it with his sword stick." She motioned to the Kwan Dao._

_Jun sighed. "There isn't anything we can do about it now except patch him up." She handed the body to a servant and walked back into the house, her entourage following her. Pin-Mei jumped up and followed them._

_"Pin-Mei, why do you have blood on your hands?"_

_She stopped and turned around. In the hallway to Ren's room was Tao Ran- his mother._

_The little girl looked down at her reddened hands then back at her hostess. "I was holding Ren's hand," she said simply._

_Ran bent down and smiled. "Oh were you now?" Pin-Mei nodded. "And how did he like that?"_

_"He was asleep so he doesn't know about it."_

_"Ah, I see. Well, let's get you cleaned up. We can't leave your hands like that. Come." She started to walk towards a washroom and the girl followed._

_After a bath and slipping into some pajamas, Ran approached her once more. "Would you like to go see Ren?" she asked._

_Pin-Mei's face lit up. "Really?" she cried._

_Ran smiled and nodded. "He's still sleeping, but I thought you'd like to know that he's going to be just fine."_

_Pin-Mei ran out the door and down the hall to Ren's room. As she neared the door, she remembered that he was sleeping so she started tiptoeing instead. She slowly turned the doorknob and entered._

_Ren was laying in his bed peacefully. She could see the bandages on his side, and it gave her a small pang of guilt, but she shook it off and sat in the chair on the left side of his bed. Ran watched as she just stared at him for hours._

_"You can talk to him, you know," she said._

_Pin-Mei looked up at her. "But he's asleep."_

_"He'll still be able to hear you. People tend to get better when they hear the voice of someone who needs them."_

_She looked back at Ren. "I need him," she whispered._

_Ran smiled. "Then talk to him."_

_Pin-Mei pushed the chair closer to the bed and cautiously held his hand as she had done before._

_"Ren-Niisama…" she began. "I'm sorry I did this to you…I'm sorry I'm always getting in your way and making you take care of me. I know you don't like me that much…but I really like you._

_"'Niisan' left me and Daddy a while ago, so you're the only brother I know. I know you already have Jun, but please let me be with you some more. Please."_

_She felt Ran's hand on her shoulder and turned to her._

_"Don't worry, you'll get to be with him," she said. She smiled._

_Pin-Mei cocked her head slightly. She had no idea what she meant by this._

* * *

Ren awoke the next morning to a sky of gray. When he opened the curtains the room became almost no lighter than when they were closed.

_This is bad...Something bad is going to happen today...I can feel it._

He looked over at Pin-Mei's bed. She was still sleeping. The hair pins he had bought her sat neatly in their box on the nightstand. Her hair was down, not in braids, and spread out among the pillows and comforters. He thought about waking her, but decided to hold out until he had made their breakfast.

As he flipped the pancakes, Ren thought about the dream he had had the night before. If all of it was true, then why did he see the things that Pin-Mei was supposed to have seen? He had remembered waking up that morning and seeing her asleep in her chair with her head on his bed, and still holding his hand. It disgusted him. He had thrust the hand away and left.

Looking back, it made him feel like a fool. His heart had been too consumed by hatred to see kindness. He hadn't wanted it. But she had held his bloody hand and waited for help, blaming the whole ordeal on herself. He couldn't blame this on himself now. It was done with. No need to worry about it now.

He heard the door open and turned to see Pin-Mei, already washed and dressed, walk in, braiding her hair with quick and expert movements.

"When you opened the curtain, the light woke me up," she said.

He blinked at her. "The room hardly lit up when I opened it."

She giggled. "Yeah, I know." She winked and stuck out her tongue.

Ren stared at her while she sat down, still giggling about how witty she was. He was still a little unused to her humor. After a little more staring, he was able to smile a little bit as he went back to his pancakes.

"Um… Niisama?"

"What?"

"Can we go back to that Crospy store?"

"You mean Cospa?"

"Yeah, that one."

"If you want, why?"

"I saw something there yesterday I wanted and I want to go back and get it."

Ren, his back to her, looked a little nervous. "What was it?"

"A bunny stuffed animal."

He breathed a silent sigh of relief. "Alright. We'll go there, first thing."

* * *

"Are you happy now?"

"Yup!" She hugged the pink rabbit tightly.

They went out onto the sidewalk and began walking to a nearby park. Pin-Mei sneezed.

"Cold?" She nodded. He smirked. "You're always cold, you little pest." He looked around and spied a hot cocoa vending machine. "Stay right here. I'm going to get us some cocoa."

She nodded. "Okay."

He started walking away, then turned back and looked into her eyes seriously. "Don't wander off, no matter what. This place is too big for a Chinese girl with no Japanese to get lost."

She nodded again. "I promise to be here when you get back." She smiled.

Satisfied, he went to the vending machine. As he reached into his pocket to get some money, his hand brushed against a small box. He clutched it for a second, then took out the money. When he had two cans of cocoa he turned to go back to her.

But as he got closer, he couldn't see her. He looked around and spotted her rabbit.

At that moment he knew what had happened. He tossed the cans behind him and ran to the stuffed animal. Frantically, he looked around. She couldn't have gone far, could she?

"Young man?"

Ren looked behind him and saw an elderly man from a nearby shop approaching him. "Yes?"

"Were you with that young lady with the braids?"

His eyes widened. "Yes! Did you see her?"

The old man looked remorseful. "I did…but…"

"But what?"

"It's best you forgot about her."


	9. Ren to the Rescue

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Nine: Ren to the Rescue**

* * *

"Forget about her? What do you mean?"

The shopkeeper shook his head. "You have almost no chance of getting her back now."

"Will you just tell me what the hell happened?" He had no time for this. Every second this old man kept him, Pin-Mei was getting further and further away from him.

"She was standing here as you told her to do when some men in black came behind her, covered her mouth, and dragged her off."

Ren was stunned. "How could all that happen without me noticing?"

"Young man, these men are masters at what they do," the shopkeeper explained. "They are part of the syndicate named Fork-Ids. They specialize in human trafficking. Not even the police know where their base is. The chances of you getting that girl back are very slim."

He began to walk off.

"Like I said, forget about her."

Ren could only stare after him. Forget about her? He couldn't. Not this way. He may have forgotten her ten years ago, but it was different now. Children can forget things easily…but teenagers can't.

_"It's nice to see you again."_

_"Niisama…what do I have to do to make you notice me?"_

_"Look! I'm doing it!"_

_"Wow! Look at all the snow!"_

_"I promise to be here when you get back!"_

It may have been only a few days, but they had already done so much. She had been a pest before, but…

_She's __my__ pest._

He looked up at the sky.

_I'll find you, Pin-Mei. I promise._

* * *

"Hey, Boss! Look what we found!"

A large man sitting with a cigar turned around in his swivel chair. Three of his associates were standing before him, two holding a struggling girl, who kept crying out in Chinese.

"What is this chick babbling about?" one of the flunkies said.

The boss smiled. "Chinese, eh?" He snickered as he took a puff of his cigar. "Don't find many of those in Japan. She'll sell for a lot." He leaned in to the girl. "What's your name, miss?"

_What is he talking about? I don't know what he's saying…I'm so scared...I wish you were here now…_

"Ren…" she whispered.

The boss scowled. "Ugly name. We'll have to give her a new one." He waved them away. "Go tie her up somewhere. Don't damage her."

The men smirked and carried her away.

Pin-Mei still had only one word still on her mind.

_Ren…_

* * *

"You two, make dinner," Anna commanded pointing at Yoh and Manta.

"But Anna, it's only three," Yoh reasoned.

"Then make it a big one so it takes longer to cook."

The two boys sighed. Their ears perked up as they heard a knock at the door.

"Sorry, Anna! Dinner will have to wait!" Yoh cried as he and Manta rushed to the door, eager to escape their fate.

When he slid the door open, he saw Ren, barely standing and breathing heavily, on the front steps.

"Ah, Ren! You came back to visit! How nice!" Then he looked around and saw that Pin-Mei wasn't with him. "Hey, we're your girlfr-,"

"Pin-Mei's been kidnapped!" Ren cried looking up at him.

Yoh's smile faded. "Come on in," he said.

After Ren took a few moments to collect himself, they all sat down and he told them what had happened.

"I'm sure she'll be fine, Ren," Yoh said trying to comfort him. "We'll help you get her back."

"It was foolish of you to leave her there," Anna said coldly from across the table. "If you were really concerned about her you would have taken her with you. Syndicate crime is going up these days, but of course you wouldn't know that."

Ren stared at the table. "I know…I just…"

"Make all the excuses you want. It won't change the fact that she's now a money-maker for the Fork-Ids syndicate. Stop being so weak. That girl's made you soft, and you can't be like that if you want to get her back."

He looked down at the floor, then closed his eyes.

"Oi, Anna, that was a little harsh," Yoh said.

"The truth hurts sometimes." She got up and laid down in front of the TV.

"She's right…since Pin-Mei appeared I've become weaker." Ren stared into his cup of cocoa. Just seeing it made him feel sick.

"Just because you like someone doesn't mean you can't still be strong. In fact, you should be strong because you care about her."

He nodded. "Yeah, I guess you're right." Then he saw the smile on Yoh's face. "No! I mean NO! I just need to get her back because it'll cause trouble if I go home alone! Otherwise I couldn't care less!"

"So your face is red with utter determination?" Manta asked. Ren punched him on the head.

"Well, Amidamaru is out floating around to see if he can find anything out. We'll find her."

Ren nodded minimally.

"Yoh-Dono!"

The group looked to see the spirit enter the room.

"Amidamaru, did you find anything?"

The samurai nodded. "I heard some men talking about a girl they just brought in. What is curious is that they said her name was 'Ren'."

Yoh and Manta looked to the real Ren, whose face was frozen.

She had called out for him. Even if she didn't know what was going on, she was scared. It made him even more desperate to find her. "So where is she?"

Amidamaru was a little phased by his sudden outburst. "They are in a building east of the cemetery. It is large and mildly run down."

Ren stood up. "Alright, I'm going."

"Hey, Ren! We should wait until we have a definite plan before we go to rescue her!"

But his words fell on deaf ears as Ren took out his portable Kwan Dao and ran out.

When he was out of sight, Yoh smiled again. "It's still nice that it's so important to him to get her back. Much different from when he first came to Japan. Hehe."

* * *

"Okay boys, bring the girl over here. I want to evaluate her."

Pin-Mei, her hands tied and tape over her mouth, was pushed over to the boss.

"Did you get that translator?"

"Yes, boss."

"Perfect."

He stood up and walked around her. She tried to keep her eyes low and not look at him. He grabbed her chin and turned her head from side to side, looking at her face.

"Tell her to look at me," he said to the translator.

The translator did and she looked up, not just because she was told to but out of pure surprise that someone who spoke her language was there. Her seller got a good look at her eyes and grinned.

"Nice and black. That's what we like to see. That alone makes her valuable." He looked down her body. "It'll make up for this."

He patted her chest. Pin-Mei screamed through the tape and tried to evade his touch. He frowned.

"Tie her up and put her in 'The Room'. It'll give her personality."

* * *

Ren ran up to the building, momentarily hiding himself behind one of its walls. He could hear two of the syndicate members talking.

"Did you get to see that new one that just came in?"

"No, did you?"

"Just a glimpse, but I hear the boss thinks he's going to make a killing off of her. Chinese, ya know? They're always in demand."

"Is it true the Don actually touched her?"

"Yeah, she didn't like it too much. Tried to jerk away. Don told them to lock her in 'The Room' tied to a chair, to 'give her personality'. Whatever that means."

"He _is_ one of the craziest bastards in all of Japan."

"True."

Ren clutched his Kwan Dao tightly to keep from exposing himself. All of it just infuriated him. Touching her, treating her like an object, tying and locking her up…

"Hey, you guys! Guess what! Don says we can have a little fun with Wonton!" a third man said.

"Who?"

"You know, the new girl. The Don thought it was a better name than Ren."

"Right. So, by fun, you mean…"

"Hehe, yeah."

Ren felt sick. He knew what they meant.

_I won't even give you the chance to look at her again._

He rushed out and felled each of the three men out with a series of punches and kicks.

"A wonton is a dumpling, not a girl. Bastards," he said and walked up the stairs to enter the building.


	10. Equivalent Exchange?

Wow, it's a little hard to believe we're already at the tenth chapter…and we still have a ways to go. Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed so far! You guys are awesome! (can't think of anything else to say)

**Note: "mei-mei" means "little sister" in Chinese. I know this will conflict with Pin-Mei calling Ren "Niisama", but …um…yeah…go plot holes…**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ten: Equivalent Exchange?**

* * *

It didn't take Ren long to reach the main quarters of the building. The guards were so weak that he was beginning to think that bringing his Kwan Dao had been a waste of time and energy. He had no trouble getting past them. He finally arrived at a door with a padlock on it.

_This must be where she is._

With one swipe of the Kwan Dao the lock was no more. He opened the door, expecting to see Pin-Mei in there. She wasn't.

Instead there were at least eight or ten girls in the small room. All looked very thin and malnourished as if they hadn't eaten in days, or even weeks. They all looked at him with wide, vacant eyes.

_What sick men…_ he thought. _I'll have to come back for these girls later, after I've secured a way out._

He was about to close the door, but stopped.

_If I just close the door, it might scare or confuse them._

"I promise to come back for you all later," he said. Then he repeated it in Chinese in case there were any other girls like Pin-Mei there. He closed the door and continued his mission.

This must have happened at least two more times. He didn't think that they would have so many girls in the building at once. As he came to the fifth door, he was about to get ready to say his Japanese/Chinese shpeal again. He slashed the Kwan Dao down and looked inside.

There she was.

She was in the room by herself, tied to a chair unlike the other girls who were able to sit and stand freely, sleeping. He cautiously walked over to her. There were tear stains on her face from crying and the skin under her eyes was red. He cupped her left cheek with his right hand and whispered into her ear.

"Brat, wake up. It's me."

Her eyes flew open as he brought his face back into her view. She tried to say a barrage of things to him through the tape, but was overwhelmed with emotion and resorted to drooping her head and crying instead. He put his hand on her head.

"Don't worry, Mei-Mei, I'm going to get you out of here."

She lifted her head a little at the sudden nickname. He took the opportunity to gently wipe the tears from her eyes. The gesture only seemed to make her cry more. Ren sighed and shook his head, but gave her a reassuring smile.

"Everything's going to be okay from now on, I promise."

He circled behind her and went to work untying the ropes that bound her hands (it was too dangerous to cut them using the Kwan Dao). The knots were expertly tied and he had a lot of trouble taking them apart.

Pin-Mei suddenly started struggling and trying to talk. Ren quickly got annoyed because it made untying the knots that much harder.

"Stop it," he commanded. "I can't untie the ropes if you keep moving around." He undid the last knot. "Okay, all done."

She shot up from the chair and ripped off the tape.

"Niisama! Behind you!"

Ren looked just in time to see a wooden sword come down and knock him out.

* * *

**Note: For this part, italics in quotes are Chinese. Italics without quotes are still thoughts. Japanese is regular text.**

* * *

When he woke up, he was chained to a wall, his arms locked above his head. Every part of his body hurt, which was visible through all the cuts and bruises he had. He looked around the room, but it was all so blurry. His mind was still cloudy, and it took him a few seconds to remember where he was and what had happened.

"Well, look who decided to wake up."

Ren looked up to see "The Don" standing in front of him. He was grinning. Behind him, Ren's Kwan Dao was laying in the corner.

"Tell this boy what a big mistake it was to try to steal Wonton," he said to the translator.

Before the translator could say one word, Ren opened his mouth.

"I don't need your damn translator," he said angrily. "And her name isn't Wonton, it's Pin-Mei. Now where is she? Tell me you god forsaken bastard!"

The Don snapped his fingers and a few of his men appeared, pulling Pin-Mei along with them. Her hands were tied again and a chain was around her neck.

"_Ren!_"

"Shut up!" One of the men tugged on the chain, forcing her head backward. The Don smirked.

"Alright, son, let's you and I have a little talk," The Don said. He turned to the translator. "I want you to tell her what's going on. After all, it has a great deal to do with her."

The translator nodded.

"Let her go. Now," Ren commanded.

"I'm sorry, but I need her for a little while. Business purposes. You understand right?"

"If you don't let her go, you're not going to have to worry about business, trust me." His eyes were cold.

The Don laughed. "And what can you do in your current situation?" He paused. "That's right, nothing." He laughed again.

From inside his coat he pulled out a pistol. "Watch this," he said grinning at his minions. He pointed the gun at Ren's head.

Pin-Mei went absolutely mad.

"_Please don't! Please! Don't kill him! I'll do anything! Just please, don't kill him!_"

"_Quiet, Pin-Mei! He's going to use that against you!_" Ren called over.

The translator smirked. "She said she'll do anything if you spare that boy's life."

"Really, now?" The boss pivoted and put his face near hers. "I wonder if she'll feel the same way once we tell her the conditions of setting the boy free." He did a motion with his head and neck in order to signal the translator to tell her the conditions.

The man went over to her and whispered in her ear. When Pin-Mei's eyes widened in horror, Ren instantly knew what the conditions were.

"_Do you accept?_"

Pin-Mei looked at the groups of men on both sides of her. They snickered, some licking their lips or blowing fake kisses. She looked to Ren. He was shaking his head, mouthing "_No_," over and over again. She closed her eyes, then smiled sadly.

"_Don't!_" Ren yelled. "_I'll be fine! You don't have to do this!_"

She opened her eyes and looked at him, still smiling.

"_It's okay, Ren,_" she said. "_I'm fine with this. It won't mean anything to me. Besides…_" Tears came to her eyes. "_Don't you think it's time for __me__ to save __you__?_"

"_You__…_"

"_I don't care what happens to me right now. Call me a goody two-shoes or a wannabe-saint or whatever you want...as long as you're okay, I'm okay, too_."

The Don was getting impatient. "WELL?"

"_Do you accept the conditions?_"

Ren stared at her. She smiled one last time before lowering her head so he couldn't see her face.

"_Yes, I accept_. _Now please, let him go._"

"Oh I forgot to mention," the Don chimed in. "The boy has to watch."

Ren's eyes widened with the same horror as Pin-Mei's. He looked at her. She had raised her head enough to meet his gaze. He swore he could see her mouth "_I'm sorry_", but he didn't know what she should be sorry for.

"Okay, get to it boys!"

Even though it had all happened in front of him it was still so surreal. He was going to have to watch her go through this. He was going to have to watch his fiancée have her spirit broken, have something precious taken from her. His brain wouldn't work. He couldn't think of anything to do. He didn't know how to save her.

_'I'm fine with this.'_

_No, she won't be,_ he thought. _She doesn't realize how much this is going to change her._ He lowered his head, his fists clenched. _She won't smile anymore. She won't be able to sleep. She won't eat. She won't let another man touch her. Not even me. She'll cry. She'll be an empty shell…_

_She won't be Pin-Mei anymore._

He snapped his head up, eyes piercing.

"LIKE HELL I'M GOING TO LET THAT HAPPEN!"

He started pulling on the chains with all his might. The men stared at him, even the ones who had by now thrown Pin-Mei to the floor.

"What does that punk think he's doing?" The Don wondered aloud.

"Idiot! There's no way he can break those chains!"

But Ren kept pulling. A bolt holding the chains in place snapped, then another.

"…'The hell?" the boss cried. "Go stop him!"

But before any of them could reach him, the last of the bolts snapped and Ren was free. He walked over and took his Kwan Dao from the corner. He didn't turn back to face them.

"I'm giving all of you three seconds to let go of her and leave," he said in a low voice.

"Just who do you think you are?" one of the men shouted. Ren turned around.

"Did you not just hear me?"

His eyes were wild. His wrists were bleeding from where the iron had dug into them. The aura around him was dark and full of rage. He pointed his weapon at the lowlifes.

"Get out of here or I'll kill you all."


	11. The Ire of Tao Ren

In this chapter, I wanted Ren to just lose it. I wanted him to act sort of like how he did the early episodes; totally effin' insane. I wanted him to be cold and merciless again, and even a little cold to Pin-Mei. However, it was hard for me to decide to do this or not. The idea of him snapping over her could lead to some Mary-Sue type qualities (he likes her much that he's willing to be like he was before in order to protect her, because she's "special"). Hopefully the aftermath will make up for that.

The next two chapters are ones that I am very excited to write. Very emotionally heavy/romantic (at least in my head). What am I talking about? Well… you'll see –winks-

**Note: Since there won't be a lot of conflicting dialogue, I'm keeping all the text regular. Pin-Mei's not going to do a lot of talking during this action sequence anyways. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eleven: The Ire of Tao Ren**

* * *

"What did you just say?"

"Get out of here or I'll kill you all." He raised his Kwan Dao. "Don't make me repeat it again."

Some of the men chuckled. "He's bluffing," one of them said.

Ren's eyes flared. "Oh, am I?"

He suddenly appeared next to a man who still had his hands on Pin-Mei and slashed him across the back with his blade. He severed the ropes on her wrists as the man cried out in pain and fell to the side. Ren picked her up from the floor and put his right hand on her hip, pulling her close to him.

"If any of you dirty bastards even THINK about touching her, I'll make sure you regret it."

The gang encircled them. Many by now had grabbed weapons - clubs, pipes, bokkens, and chains. The Don stuck with his gun.

Ren allowed Pin-Mei to cling to him for a moment in order to calm her down before releasing her. He looked to his right and saw a small double-door closet. Without warning, he opened it, shoved her inside, then closed it again.

"Ren!"

He placed a bar through the handles to keep it closed.

"Stay in there. Don't come out until I tell you to." His tone was cold.

Pin-Mei backed farther into the closet. _What was that voice?_

Ren turned back to the mob. "If you have a death wish, then come and attack me."

A large man in black leather with a bokken approached him. "Feh. Kid, I don't think you know what you're getting yourself into. I think _we_ should be the ones giving _you_ one last chance to run away." He tapped the bokken against his neck and sneered.

Ren was not shaken in the least. "Does this make you the first?" he asked.

The man laughed. "Wo-ho! All business! I like you, kid!" He readied himself.

No matter how ready he thought he was, he never saw Ren coming.

"Dude! He just got Akira!"

He pulled his Kwan Dao from the fallen man's back. "Which one of you vermin is next?"

Another man stepped forward. Ren quickly disposed of him. The whole group finally charged at him. He easily sliced through them. They flew everywhere; against the walls, on the floor, out the windows.

When the dust cleared, Ren was standing in the center of a circle of bodies. He glared across the room at the only person left- The Don.

The syndicate boss was cowering in the corner like a coward. As Ren began a slow walk toward him, stepping on and over bodies along the way, he pushed himself up against the wall more, not even thinking of running away. By the time he stopped in front of him, The Don was reduced to a sniveling crybaby. Ren scoffed at him.

"It's because of people like you that I wanted to cleanse the world," he said. "You don't even deserve to be called human."

He raised his Kwan Dao high.

"Go back to Hell where you belong."

He brought the blade down to end it all.

But it never made contact. Ren looked behind him to see Yoh holding the back of the handle.

"That's enough, Ren," he said calmly.

His friend only glared at him. "Yoh, let go."

"Sorry, but I refuse."

"You don't know what this guy has done and what he tried to do!"

"So it makes it alright to kill him?"

He said nothing. Saying "YES" wasn't really an option. He just kept giving him a cold stare.

"Ren, look at yourself. Look at what you're doing. There are potentially dead bodies all around the room. Even a couple in the streets. I think it's time you stopped."

Ren whirled around and looked at him angrily. "I'm doing this for HER! He was going to violate her if I didn't do something! All of this was for HER!"

Yoh sighed. "Did you ever wonder how she felt about this?" He turned in the direction of the closet where HoroHoro was looking inside.

The Ainu turned to the other two. "She won't come out."

Ren suddenly softened as he ran over to the hiding place. He shoved the blue-haired boy out of the way and entered. HoroHoro looked down at his shirt where Ren had pushed him.

"Oi, this is never going to come out!"

Inside the closet, which was actually large behind the doors, Pin-Mei was huddled in the corner, covering her ears. Although it was still dark Ren could see her outline, and that was all he needed. He knelt down and touched her face.

"Everything's okay now, they're all gone," he said.

"Oi! I found a light!" Horo called from the room. He flicked on a switch and the closet lit up.

Pin-Mei screamed.

Where Ren had touched her face, there was a large blood mark. She had felt that it was slimy and touched it. Now it was on her hand. When she looked at him, she screamed even more and assumed a fetal position in the corner.

Her cries had surprised him. He looked behind him quickly, thinking that an enemy was there. Seeing none he turned back to her. He tried to reach for her again to touch her.

"Mei-Mei, what-"

When his hand got close, she looked up and saw it. She flinched and huddled again, shaking.

"What…I don't understand…"

Yoh walked in behind him. "Ren…look in the mirror."

Ren looked to the wall mirror on his left. Now he understood.

Blotches of blood were all over his face, body, and clothes. Even parts of his hair were dyed a dark crimson. He stared at his hands. They were soaked in it. He stared at the floor before standing.

_I haven't changed at all._


	12. Her Reason

This chapter is basically a prologue for the next one. Despite that, I think this was one of my favorites to write so far. I hope you all enjoy it.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twelve: Her Reason**

* * *

"So what do we do with her?"

"She can't stay here. It's another mouth to feed."

"Come on, Anna. She can't go home right now, she's too scared."

"So of course she feels more comfortable in a place where she hardly knows the people and can only speak to one of them."

"At least until tonight?"

"Fine, but you're paying for what she eats."

"Aw…Anna…"

Yoh, Anna, and HoroHoro looked out to the koi pond in the backyard where Pin-Mei was standing. Her clothes, stained with blood, were being washed, and she had been given Yoh's old shaman fight clothes to wear. She just stared into the water.

_Niisama…why…why did you kill all of those people?_

That wasn't the Ren she knew. Not the Ren who saved her from drowning, from a dog, who taught her how to swim, who had a snowball fight with her, who had bought her those beautiful butterfly clips.

She took one of her braids and touched the clip attached to the end.

_He's still Ren. Even if it was the wrong choice, he said he did it for me… Should I be so afraid of him just because one thing went wrong?_

She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to see Yoh standing behind her.

"Yo!" he said cheerfully, raising his hand in greeting.

Not knowing what to do, she mimicked the gesture.

"You like fish?"

She stared at him, stunned that he was speaking Chinese. "H-How do you know Chinese?"

"Ren taught me when we were all traveling together. So, fish?"

"…um…yeah…sure…I guess…"

"Good, because we're having it for dinner. We dragged one of our friends over and he's cooking tonight."

"Oh, good." She turned back to the pond.

Yoh thought for a moment. Then a light bulb went off. He grabbed her wrist and led her inside.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

Yoh ignored her. "HoroHoro, Manta, come with me - I've got an idea!"

"What?"

He looked back at them, smiling. "We're going to give Pin-Mei a Japanese lesson!"

* * *

"Yeah! Yeah! That's funny! Make her say it again!"

Pin-Mei just blinked at them.

Yoh put his headphones on her head and behind her ears and grinned. "Okay, now say it."

She looked at him again before she stood up, folded her arms, and beamed.

"I want to become the Shaman King so I can live an easy life!"

"Pfft! That's just like him!" Horo cried.

Manta laughed uneasily. "It almost seems cruel, though. She doesn't know what she's saying."

"C'mon, Manta! It's not like we're making her say anything nasty."

"Dinner is served!" Ryu called from downstairs.

Yoh turned to Pin-Mei. "Okay, chow time!" She cocked her head at him. "Um…chi fan?"

"Ah!" she nodded furiously, showing she understood. She jumped up and headed for the door, then struck a triumphant pose. "Bestou Plasu!"

Manta looked worried. "I think we taught her a little too much."

"Don't worry about it," Horo said. "It's harmless."

But as they finished their dinner, it became apparent that his statement may not be true. The boys were about to get up and leave when Pin-Mei pretended to take a drink and closed her eyes.

"You better pay for what you eat and drink," she said.

The whole room stopped. All eyes were on Pin-Mei and Anna. The medium looked at her copycat, then stood up.

"At least now I don't have to say it," she said calmly as she left the room. Pin-Mei beamed.

"Funny!" she exclaimed.

The boys sighed with relief, but Yoh noticed her fading smile as she stared at the bottle in front of her.

"Ren…"

When he walked over to her, he realized she had barely eaten any of her food. He bent down to her level.

"Hey, let's go for a walk." He smiled.

She didn't look too pleased. "Alright."

She stood up and followed him slowly. He handed her one of his old coats, and they left the house.

Pin-Mei marveled at the snow on the trees. "It's so beautiful here. I wish it snowed back in China." She gave a small laugh, which faded until she ultimately hid her eyes. He looked at her sympathetically.

"You're thinking about him, aren't you?"

She nodded slowly. "Is it that obvious?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, kind of." When she didn't smile he continued. "Why wouldn't you go home with him?"

They were on a small bridge. She stopped and looked out onto the water.

"I was…scared," she said slowly. "When I was in that closet, hiding, all I could hear were the screams of the men outside. I even heard the blood splatter against the door." She was shaking again. "That person out there wasn't Ren."

"What do you mean?" Yoh asked.

"No matter what anyone else says, I know that Ren has always been a kind person, even when he was full of hate." She smiled faintly. "I've been enthralled ever since I first saw him. Even when he yelled at me and ignored me, I still clung to him.

"I've been lonely since I was born. I didn't have any friends other than my three maidservants. Ren filled that void I had. He protected me. Even though he was cold, I felt like he cared about me. He was the big brother I always wanted. I was happy. It was enough for me…but…"

Yoh dipped his head and looked up at her. "But…?"

She folded her hands and kept her eyes on them.

"Last year on my birthday, my father told me that back when I had first met Ren it had already been decided that we would be married. It was then that I realized my natural feelings for him; feelings that weren't forced because we were set up as a couple. I had always wanted to be close to him, always wanted to hold his hand. Now I knew what it all meant. After that, I began counting down the days until January 1, his birthday, when I would be able to see him again.

"My father never said when we would be leaving this time, so I could just be made to leave at any time without saying the one thing I want him to know."

"So just go ahead and tell him."

"I…I can't."

"Why not?"

"I promised myself that I would wait until I wasn't a child anymore."

Yoh sighed. "If that's what you've decided…"

She bowed her head. "It must have hurt so much…"

"Huh?"

"The girl you taught and gave gifts to and risked your life to rescue flinches and hides from you."

"He understood why you were upset."

"But he looked hurt, didn't he?"

"Well, yeah…"

She breathed in quickly. "I was wrong. Twice now. TWICE I've hurt him when he was trying to do something for me…" Her voice quivered. "I'm such a fool! I don't even deserve to have these feelings!"

"Hey, hey, calm down. Don't be so hard on yourself." He put his hand on her shoulder.

"Yoh…"

"What?"

"I…" She looked at him, tears streaming down her face. "I want to go home…"

He smiled at her.

"Okay, let's go."


	13. His Feelings

I proofread this one multiple times because I really want it to be perfect. This chapter took me two days to write and I'm rather proud of it.

Yes, if you were waiting for Emo!Ren, this is your chapter. I dedicate this to you.

Without further ado, I present… the fluff chapter.

**Notes: Just to make sure this is clear, "home" is Ren's condo-thingy in Japan, not Tao Castle.**

"**Urusse" basically means "shut up".**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirteen: His Feelings**

* * *

Ren sat on the couch, his elbows on his knees and his head hanging down, the scenes from that day playing over and over in his mind.

_She looked up at him, her face damp with tears, the blood running down her cheek._

"_Niisama…what's happened to you?"_

_He stared at her._

"_Where's the Ren I gave the last milk to? Where's the Ren I used to cook for? Where's the Ren I watched in the gym until I fell asleep?" She was practically screaming, her eyes blinded by tears. "Where's the Ren who gave me these clips?" She grabbed a braid and shook it._

"_WHERE IS HE? TELL ME! I WANT HIM NOW!"_

_She buried her face in her knees and continued bawling. Ren wanted to touch her again, but stopped himself._

_He looked up as Yoh stepped in. "I think you guys should go home and work this out."_

"_No…"_

_Ren snapped his head back to look at her. Had he heard her right?_ _She turned her head on her knees so she could look at him, still sobbing._

"_Niisama…I can't go home with you tonight."_

_He stared at her, not believing what she had just said. "What…?"_

"_I'm sorry, Niisama…I just can't…"_

Then it was decided that she would go home with Yoh for the night. When they parted, she wouldn't even look at him. When they walked away from each other, he found himself constantly looking back at her. She didn't look even once.

Now he was home by himself, wallowing in self-pity.

He hid his face in his hands. "What have I done…"

The box from his jacket sat before him on the coffee table. He picked up his head and stared at it. A wave of rage consumed him as he grabbed it and stood up.

"Piece of shit…you're worthless now!"

He threw it against the wall as hard as he could. It bounced off and hit the floor, some of its corners dented. He turned his back on it but quickly turned back around. He stared at it, overcome with regret.

"Please don't be broken…" he whispered as he went and picked it up.

He opened the box and breathed a sigh of relief. He stood up and placed it back on the table.

_Why am I acting like this?_

He sat down on the couch again. He was surprised when he suddenly felt a burning in his eyes. Something was welling up inside him. It was a feeling that was so foreign to him. The emotion that came with it, however, was something that had been part of his life for as long as he could remember.

"Stop it," he told himself.

He placed his thumb and index finger over his eyelids, keeping them shut. The burning was getting stronger.

"Stop it."

After a few deep breaths, it went away. He opened his eyes and resumed his position, staring at the floor through his legs.

_But is this really it? Is it all over? __Pin-Mei…_

A horrible thought shot through his mind.

_What if they break the engagement?_

He suddenly felt like he had a large void where his heart was supposed to be. The burning came back. He felt sick. His fingers closed his eyes again. A few deep breaths weren't enough. It took almost five minutes this time. When he looked up he seemed almost angry.

"That idiot…She's the one who did this to me. Why should I cry over a spoiled brat like her? She's not even thankful that I saved her life! I should just leave her here and go back to China by myself. I don't need someone like her hanging around me and stalking me in the shower and while I'm training!"

Still, he was unable to deny those fleeting moments when he had wanted to smile at her antics and her words. There was a certain amount of warmth that could be found in her that he was unable to find in anyone else, even Jun. He softened.

"Still…It wasn't that bad when she would run around bringing me milk so I wouldn't have to get it myself. And towels. And the way she'd look at me with that stupid smile on her face."

Then he realized it – the reason why he suddenly felt the way he did.

_Shit…_

He rested his forehead on his folded hands. "Fine, I admit it. I want her to come back. She's not as horrible as I first thought she was. I should have treated her better." He closed his eyes. "Just give me one more chance. I'll do it right this time."

As if to answer his plea, the doorbell rang. He looked up in disbelief.

"Pin-Mei?"

He got up and went to the door. Before opening it, he took a deep breath, hoping he hadn't been hearing things. Slowly, he turned the knob and opened the door. He hadn't imagined it.

Pin-Mei was waving goodbye to Yoh from over the railing. "Zan-kyu!" she said smiling. As she turned around the smile faded until she and Ren were just staring at each other.

"Your eyes are red," he whispered.

"Yours are too," she whispered back.

Silence.

"Can I come in?" she asked.

He wanted to smile, but couldn't. "If you want to."

She walked past him without looking at him. He found himself staring at the spot in which she had been standing. He finally snapped out of it and closed the door. She had by now taken off her jacket and was standing in the center of the room. Looked her up and down. She was wearing a black school girl outfit with a sweater over it, and black tights.

"You got new clothes."

"Yeah…My other ones were still in the wash."

Silence. She rummaged through a grocery bag she had been carrying with her. He took a few steps toward her.

"Pin-Mei, listen, I—,"

"Please accept this!"

She had bowed her head and stretched her arms out in front of her, holding something in her hands.

Ren stopped and looked at her, not knowing what to make of this. Gingerly he took the parcel from her hands. He placed the bag on the table and stuck his hand in. When it was empty, three bottles of milk were sitting on the table. His eyes widened when he saw the ring box near one of the bottles.

"Umm…I want to apologize for what happened today…how I reacted," she said quietly.

Ren turned away from the milk, snatching the box and hiding it in his pocket. "No, what I did today was much worse. I shouldn't have—,"

"Thank you."

"What?"

"Thank you for what you did, I mean it. If you hadn't done that…I…things would…be different."

"I-,"

"Please, Niisama, let me finish.

"You saved me. You came for me. You risked your life for me, and it's not the first time. You're always protecting me. You do so much for me, and I haven't done anything for you."

Ren turned away from her. "That's not true."

"Yes it is. Even when you hated me, you took care of me. The only thing I can do for you is cook. Sometimes I honestly think that I don't deserve you, that you're too good for me."

"Urusse..." she heard him mutter. She didn't know what it meant.

"What?"

He turned around and walked toward her.

"Don't you dare say that," he said in a dark voice. As he approached her she took a few steps backward. "Don't say things that make you look like a fool." A few more steps. "Why do you think I wanted you to be here with me?" A few more steps. "Why do you think I bought those clips for you?" A few more steps. "Why do you think I went after you?" A few more steps. "Why do you think I killed all those bastards?" A few more steps. "Why do you think my eyes are red?"

Her back hit the wall. She flinched as he slammed his right palm against the wall to her left then gently took her chin in his left, his thumb on top.

"Why, do you think, I'm going to do this?"

Before she could react he tilted her chin up and leaned in to capture her lips in his.

She stood in disbelief for a moment, eyes wide open, before she accepted it and closed them, returning the kiss. Her legs suddenly felt weak and gave out, but he caught her and slowly guided her down the wall to rest on the floor. She managed to sit on her legs to prop herself up and lean into him more. He took his hand from the wall and put it behind her head, pulling her close to him as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

His tongue escaped from his mouth into hers where it was accepted without hesitation. They gracefully glided off each other again and again, him teasing her and ultimately making her go after him.

When they finally broke their kiss Ren kept his face near hers.

"Remember when I told you that even I get scared?" he whispered in her ear.

"Yes," she breathed.

"Today was the most scared I've been in a very long time."

"Why?"

"When you were gone, I was scared I'd never find you. When you decided to let those men have you so that I would be spared, I was scared that I'd lose the goofy, happy girl who makes me smile. When I was sitting here alone, I was afraid you would never come back. I was afraid I'd lose you forever. I was afraid…that I'd never be able to show you how I feel about you."

"But at least you did that, ne?" She smiled.

He studied her for a second, then gave a shaky smile. It was suddenly clear that Xu Zhang, Pin-Mei's father, had never given her "the talk". A simple (painfully simple) explanation wouldn't hurt.

"Yeah, a little," he said. "I want to talk to you about something. But first, let's get ready for bed."

He took her hand and brought her into their room. She put on her purple silk nightgown and took out her braids while he went and put the milk in the refrigerator. He went back in when she was finished and took off his shirt, leaving his pants on so he could sleep in them. Taking her hand again he led her to his bed and sat her down. She cocked her head as he joined her, sitting on her right.

"Niisama?"

He took her right hand in his left. Even with just the light from the moon, he could see her shyly looking at the floor, blushing. After a small smile, he looked serious again.

"There's another way that people show their affection for someone. It's much more serious than kissing. It's something that's important to think about before you do it, because once you've done it, you've given that person something that you'll never be able to get back. You have to be ready for it, or else you might regret it later on, depending on the person." _I sure as hell didn't care, but GS knows a sentimental brat like her would._

"So what happens?" She looked at him with genuine innocence.

"Um…" He hadn't really expected her to ask for details. He racked his brain for a suitable answer. Finally, he found one.

"The two people get into bed, get really close, and hug each other for a long time. For most people it feels nice, and it makes them happy because they get to show that person how much they mean to them.

"But some people won't wait and they force someone to do it with them, even if they don't love them. It's used as a form of control. That's what those men today wanted to do to you."

Pin-Mei looked at their hands. "I knew about the forcing part," she said quietly. "When I was younger, one of the women who spent most nights with my father told me that happened once to one of the other ladies, and that she wouldn't talk to anyone anymore. She just called it rape…but I didn't know what it was. All she told me was that it hurt her and made her cry."

He looked to their hands and squeezed hers. So she_ had_ known what would happen, but she still chose to do it. A selfless act that would destroy her from the inside out. All for him. He'd hate her for it if he didn't care for her as much as he did.

"N-Niisama..."

"Hm?"

She looked up at him shyly. "I...I want my s-special thing to be with you."

Ren stared at her, then let a small smile form. He used his right hand to touch her cheek, which she leaned into. He seized the opportunity to move in and kiss her neck, causing her to shiver.

"Don't worry. I'll never let anyone take that from you until you're ready to give it yourself."

"Niisama…"

He pulled back and looked into her eyes. "Call me Ren," he said.

"Okay…Ren…"

He kissed her again before letting her go.

"It's getting late. We should go to bed."

She nodded slowly. "Yeah…I guess…" She got up from the bed. "Good night."

Ren watched her walk over to her bed and lift the covers a little. She put one knee on the bed to get in, but stopped. A moment later, she dropped the sheet altogether.

"What is it?" he asked.

She turned to face him slowly. "Um…Niisama?"

He was sitting with one leg off the bed and one folded Indian-style. His elbow rested on his knee, and his face rested on his fist. He tapped his fingers on the one hanging off.

"Forgive me, but I don't know who you're talking about," he said, stone-faced.

"Um, Ren?"

He smirked. "Yes?"

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

His shadowed figure hid a red face. After what he had told her tonight, this was awkward. As for Pin-Mei, the silence made her uneasy.

"I just…The last time I fell asleep, I was by myself. I…want to know that you're there."

He gave her his soft-eyed smile and reached his right hand out to her. "Come here, you little pest."

She smiled and walked over to place her hand in his. He gently pulled her onto the bed and they got under the covers. They got close to each other, and he wrapped his arm around her. She seemed to be confused as to what to do with her hands, moving them from his arms to his waist, then to her sides.

"Sit still."

"S-Sorry..."

She placed them on his hips. He held his breath for a split second, then forcefully moved them to rest in front of her chest.

"There."

"Okay..."

To his surprise she fell asleep mere moments later. He watched her for a few minutes, then closed his eyes.

There was another foreign feeling washing over him.

Unlike before, it was a warm, comforting one.

One that he knew he might become addicted to.

He pulled her closer.


	14. Plan P

I've been asked what this "soft-eyed smile" of Ren's looks like. Well, if you watch episode 20 (I've stated before that it's one of my favourite episodes), after the night of fun the boys have, Ren's sitting on the windowsill and has a flashback. After the whole "No one can help it" line, he says "No, there may be someone who can help it." He looks over at the boys, and smiles. THAT'S the smile I'm talking about. So, whenever Ren smiles, that's the smile he's smiling. You could also say the smile he gives Yoh about twenty seconds later is the same thing. Get it?

Don't you love how Pin-Mei keeps going on about how the only thing she can do for Ren is cook, when she hasn't cooked a blessed thing since they got to Japan?

**Notes: I just want to make sure this is 110 percent crystal clear: Ren and Pin-Mei did NOT "do anything" in between the last chapter and this one. That includes making love. Thank you for your time.**

**As of September 2011, the yen amount in this chapter is equal to about $5560 - $2000 higher than its original value in September 2006. Yay economy...  
**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fourteen: Plan P**

* * *

The next morning, Ren opened his eyes to see Pin-Mei's sleeping face next to him. He was momentarily alarmed, but then remembered what had happened the night before. She had shown up after telling him she couldn't go home with him. She said that she wasn't good enough for him. As punishment, he kissed her. Then he gave her a watered down version of "the talk". She had asked to sleep in his bed with him, and he had finally admitted it to himself.

He was in love.

Ren touched his lips gently with his fingertips. Her lips had been so soft, yet her body so cold. Even when he held her against him as they fell asleep. He looked at her again. Some pieces of hair were covering her face, and he gently pushed it away. She moaned and turned over.

_Two more days_ he thought. _I only have two days to do it before we have to go back home._ He looked at the small box on the bureau. _You better not fail me.  
_

After staring out the window while trying to come up for a game plan for that day, he went and knelt over on her side of the bed.

"Pin-Mei, time to wake up," he said rubbing her shoulder. She moaned again and hid under her pillow.

"Brat," he mumbled. He stood up and took hold of the sheets. With one strong pull, she was without covers. She shivered and reached in vain for them.

"I said, 'Time to get up'."

She grumbled something that sounded similar to "I AM up" and "get out so I can get dressed."

He sighed. "Fine, have it your way. I'm making breakfast."

He walked out of the room and threw a pan on the stove. When he went into the refrigerator to get eggs, he saw the bottles of milk on the shelf and smiled. Probably the oddest present he had ever received, besides her. Maybe quaint was a better word; strange, yet pleasing.

As he flipped the sizzling eggs, he heard a small cry from their room. He looked from the eggs to the room and back again. Finally, he put the pan on a cool burner and ran into the room.

"Pin-Mei, what's wrong?"

He stopped dead in his tracks. Pin-Mei was standing at the bureau holding the box—the _open_ box. It was the pink rose ring that she had been looking at in the _Cospa_ store.

She looked up and saw him, suddenly looking guilty.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I knew I shouldn't have…but…my curiosity got the best of me. I'm sorry, Ren."

He didn't want her to feel bad about something he was going to give her anyway, so he forced a cocky smile.

"I did this on purpose."

She looked up at him. "You did?"

"Oh yes. Because I know you well enough to know you'll get into anything and everything, even when you're not supposed to."

This was a total lie. It just sounded good at the time. But it worked.

"Wow! I'd never expect you to do that!" She gave him the box. "Put it on me?" She stuck out her tongue and winked.

He smiled and put it on her finger. She glomped him.

"It's so pretty! Thank you so much! I love it!" she cried.

Ren tried to look happy, but couldn't help feeling down about her finding it.

_Well, there goes that plan._

He sighed again. Suddenly she was gone. He looked out to the kitchen and saw her. There she was, taking over his cooking.

"Hey! That's mine!"

She looked back at him. "But I want to!"

"You can't just go around stealing people's cooking!"

"I'm not _stealing_, I'm _helping it along_."

"I only left it because you found the ring!"

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease?"

"Fine. But don't burn it."

"Okay." She looked mischievous. "Go put on a shirt, barbarian."

He looked down and realized that he was, indeed, still shirtless. He blushed. "Fine I will!" he yelled. "Watch out for poison in your food next time I cook."

"Nyah nyah poison Tao family nyah nyah," Pin-Mei teased in an immature voice.

"Probably better than what your family does,"

"Yeah…we just decapitate people with portable guillotines."

"What?"

"Just kidding."

* * *

After they ate and got ready, they went out to Shibuya so Pin-Mei could get a couple things for herself.

Ren grabbed her hand and held onto it tightly.

"From now on you have to hold my hand," he said sternly. "I don't want us to get separated again." Pin-Mei blushed and nodded. "Alright, let's go." He started walking and she followed.

From time to time she would just stop in front of a window without telling him, causing him to be jerked back. After a few times he started to scold her about it.

"If you want to go into a store, you can just ask. I'm not going to bite you."

"Yeah…" It was a dreamy tone, and she had the face to go with it. He looked into the window.

It was a jewelry store. She was looking at the rings on display.

Another chance. He was being given another chance. This time he wasn't going to leave it out in the open. Time was of the essence, and before long she'd start to become suspicious with all these rings showing up. This time his plan would be carried out flawlessly, and she would cry - mission accomplished. But for now, he'd be his regular cynical self.

"Come on, let's go." He sighed and led her into the store. She looked around, stupefied and just staring at all the rings.

A salesperson approached them. "Good day, sir, madam. What can I help you with today?"

Ren looked over at Pin-Mei. He could talk freely about what he wanted since she wouldn't be able to understand him anyway. Such a blessing.

"Engagement rings," he said looking back to the salesman.

"Ah! I see! Well then I suppose she's the lucky lady." He looked over at Pin-Mei who was looking at some animals made of crystal.

Ren internally rolled his eyes. "Flattery isn't going to make me consider the most expensive one."

He could tell by the man's flustered expression that he had hit the nail on the head. "W-Why sir! I don't know what you're talking about!" It was obvious he was lying.

Ren ignored him and called Pin-Mei over. "Don't bother trying to talk to her. She doesn't know Japanese."

The clerk chuckled. "What is she then? Chinese?"

Ren narrowed his eyes. "As a matter of fact, yes. Does that pose a problem?"

"No, of course not!"

"Could you just show her some rings?"

"Yes, of course sir!"

They were in there for at least a half hour. Finally, Pin-Mei had found one that she liked.

"This one!" She stuck it in his face. It was platinum with three stones in it. The middle was square, the side stones in the shape of tears.

"I can see it, Pin-Mei, I'm not blind."

"I know. I just wanted to make sure you see it." She put it down and look at it with a sad smile. "I wish I could have one like this."

Ren looked around. He had to distract her with something. His eyes fell on the case of crystal she had been looking at earlier.

"Well, tell you what. Since I can't get you the ring, go pick out one of the figurines and I'll get it for you."

"Really?"

He gave her a cocky smile. "Would I lie to you?" Then he thought about "the talk". "Don't answer that. But yes, I will."

She smiled and skittered over to the case to begin the deliberation process. He made sure she was occupied before turning back to the sales clerk.

"Okay, how much is that ring?"

"¥430,354."

_Tch. She could have picked something a little more expensive._

He paid for it quickly and slipped it into his jacket just as Pin-Mei skipped over.

"I like these," she said. She held out her hands. A small porcelain turtle dove was in each. He paid for them and gave her the bag.

"I bought them, so you carry them," he said.

"Yes, sir!" She saluted him.

Ren smiled at her patted her head. "Good girl."

"What am I? A dog?"

"Don't even go there."

* * *

They got home in the late afternoon to a phone call from Yoh.

"Yo!"

He let out a small groan. "What is it, Yoh?"

"We thought since you guys are going back to China in a couple days we should have a huge dinner tonight!"

"Sounds good."

"Oh, by the way, could you bring your clothes from the Shaman Fight if you have them there?"

"I have them…but why?"

"Hehe…you'll see."


	15. Their Confession

**Disclaimer: I do not own Utada Hikaru (her label does) or Shaman King Hiroyuki Takei does). If you're wondering why her name is there, if you know her music you'll see why as you read.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifteen: Their Confession**

* * *

Just as Ren and Pin-Mei arrived at the Asakura home, Yoh came out to meet them

"Yo! Glad you could make it," he said with his usual smile.

"Yeah, well, Pin-Mei got excited so we couldn't not come." Ren gestured to Pin-Mei, who looked like she was thinking really hard. Yoh turned his attention to her.

"Yo!" he said again, raising his hand.

Pin-Mei looked as if she had an epiphany, remembering what she had been taught the day before.

"Yo!" She bounced and stuck her hand up in the air.

"Good job!" Yoh said patting her head.

Ren looked slightly disturbed. "Do I even want to know?"

"Either way, you're going to find out!" He grinned as he looked at the shopping bag she was holding. "Are those the clothes I asked you to bring?"

Ren looked at the bag as if he was surprised it was there. "Yeah…"

"Great! C'mon, Pin-Mei!" He snatched the girl's hand along with the bag and ran into the house. Ren just stared after them.

"What the hell?"

HoroHoro appeared in the doorway. "Weeeeeeeeeeell! If it isn't Tao Reru!"

Reru glared at him. "I told you to _never_ call me that!"

Horo shrugged. "Come on, Ren. Learn to take a joke. Let's go in. Everyone's waiting."

They went inside and sat at the long table after exchanging greetings with everyone else there: Anna, Manta, Pirka, Tamao, and Ryu. As Ren sat in his designated spot he noticed that the seat to his right, Pin-Mei's seat, was empty. Yoh was missing as well. He looked around.

"Any of you seen Pin-Mei?"

Horo grinned maliciously. "Oh yeah…she's around here SOMEWHERE."

Ren definitely did _not_ have a good feeling about this. Just as dinner was about to begin, Yoh appeared in the doorway.

"Okay, we're ready!" he declared. He looked to an area hidden by the wall. "Come on, come on, don't be so shy." He pulled on an arm, but it flailed and he let go.

"I can't do this…he'll hate me."

"No he won't. Now come on!" He gave one more strong pull.

Out stumbled Pin-Mei, dressed in Ren's old battle attire. A clip in the back of her head made some hair stick up in order to imitate his tongari. Aside from her long hair and black eyes, she looked like a female version of him.

Ren, who had been drinking some milk, spit it out and stared at her. "What the hell is going on?"

Yoh grinned as if he had created a masterpiece. "We thought it would be cute."

"What are you talking about?" Ren yelled, standing up. "It's not cute, it's creepy! I can't even believe you had the gall to do such a thing!" He was going to continue, but then he saw the look on Pin-Mei's face.

She was looking sideways to the ground at her right, signaling that she didn't like this idea either. He was speaking Japanese and thus she could not understand his words, but his tone told her everything she needed to know. Her face was burning red, obviously embarrassed to be dressed as the person who had kissed her the night before. She was trying so hard not to make eye contact with him, but her eyes still trailed over to him occasionally only to quickly come back when she noticed that he was still looking at her. Ren realized that he wasn't making this any easier for her. He sighed.

"Okay Pin-Mei, come over here." She shuffled over to him and sat down on the pillow next to him, still not looking at him. Yoh took his seat and the meal began.

HoroHoro, who was seated across from the Rens, giggled. "They look so cute together," he said in a teasing voice. Ren ignored him. Pin-Mei, however, continued to blush and hid her eyes under her bangs.

"You know," Manta said. "Pin-Mei looks like she's about the same height Ren was when he first came here."

Everyone looked at the pair at the end of the table. Ren _had_ grown taller since the Shaman Fights, and it looked as though she was, indeed, his size.

"Of course she's the same size. How else would she fit into his clothes? Use your head for once," Anna said from the other side of the table. Such an obvious answer. Manta sulked in the corner.

Soon, dessert was served- strawberry shortcake. Pin-Mei only took a few bites, and kept looking at HoroHoro. Finally, he looked up at her and waved an Utada Hikaru CD case at her. She nodded, and gulped before turning to Ren.

"Um…Ren?"

He stopped eating and looked at her. It was still a little weird to be looking at a chibi of himself. "What?"

She smiled. "You are always gonna be my love! You are always gonna be the one!" she cried.

He gawked at her. She kept smiling, obviously not knowing what she had just said. Everyone watched as Ren's face quickly turned red. He resumed his spot, trying to hide his face gracefully with his hand. Seeing his reaction, her smiled slowly faded and she turned back to her food solemnly.

"HoroHoro! Did you teach her that?" Yoh cried.

HoroHoro nodded and grinned. "Yup! Isn't it funny?"

"Actually, it's kind of cute," Tamao said blushing.

"Whatever. We get to see Ren act like a lovesick idiot, so my job is done!" He roared with laughter. Ren was about to go after him when he was interrupted.

"Pin-Mei," Yoh whispered. She looked up at him. "Do it." She nodded and sat with her head resting on her fist and looked annoyed. Ren looked at her quizzically.

"Pin-Mei? Something wrong?"

HoroHoro stopped laughing. "What? Are you upset over me having you say that? It was your choice."

She shot him a death glare that made him a little uneasy.

"Your face looks like what stupid people have."

His mouth dropped. "Whaaaaaaat?"

The room was silent. Suddenly, a stifled laughter was heard. Pin-Mei looked to her left and saw something she never though she'd see.

Ren was laughing. He had his right arm folded across his chest and his other hand on his forehead. It was obvious he was trying to hide it. Finally, he relented and let it all out.

"I can't believe you guys!" he cried through his laughter. "Teaching her those phrases, and then dressing her up in my clothes! I mean, honestly!"

She smiled. It was the first time she had ever heard it his laugh, but she knew that she loved the sound of it.

* * *

"So you finally got her a ring. About time."

"Silence. I didn't know what she'd like until she chose this one at the jeweler's."

"Can I see?"

Ren took the small box from his jacket, opened it, and showed it to his friend.

"It's nice," Yoh said smiling. "I think she'll like it."

"She better- she picked it out."

"Well, that helps."

They turned and looked over to where Anna and Pin-Mei were walking to the onsen.

"Anna knows Chinese too, apparently. She said she was told to learn it in order to better associate herself with the world of spirits."

"Oh." He wasn't amused. "Why are you bringing this up now?"

"I don't know…Don't you ever wonder what Pin-Mei talks about when you're not there?"

Ren looked down at her. She was walking backwards and talking to Anna, who seemed to pay her no mind. She was smiling. He almost wished he knew why.

"No."

* * *

"…And that's what he told me."

"Hm. Ren never struck me as the type to hide details."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Do you honestly think lying in bed together and hugging is more intimate than kissing?"

"Um…well…"

Anna sighed. "You really are naïve. I had already done it by your age and here you are not even knowing about it."

Pin-Mei's eyes widened. "Really? What's it like, what's it like?"

"It'd be too much for your little brain to handle."

"No it wouldn't! Come on! Tell me! Please Anna! Pretty please!"

"Just your word choice right there is proof enough that you aren't ready."

"But what if it happened tonight or tomorrow night or some night soon and I don't know what's going on?"

She sighed again. "If you weren't ready I don't think he'd force the issue."

Pin-Mei stared down into the water. "I just don't want to screw it up."

Anna rolled her eyes. "You really are a brat. Come here."

Pin-Mei obeyed and Anna began whispering in her ear. The more she said, the wider Pin-Mei's eyes became. When she finally pulled away they were as large as dishes.

"Wow…"

* * *

That night when Ren and Pin-Mei returned home they immediately started getting ready for bed. Pin-Mei remained quiet, even getting lost in thought while brushing her teeth. Ren looked over at her.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded slowly. "Yeah…"

She rinsed her mouth out and turned to leave. He grabbed her arm.

"Don't lie to me. You didn't say a word the whole way home. That's not like you. Tell me what's going on."

She looked away from him. "It's…it's nothing."

"I said stop lying to me!" Suddenly, he remembered what Yoh had said.

"_Don't you ever wonder what Pin-Mei talks about when you're not there?"_

"Something happened with Anna, didn't it?"

She wouldn't answer. He shook her a little.

"Didn't it?"

She looked back at him.

"I…I know the truth now, Ren."

He froze. "What do you mean?"

"Anna told me. You weren't being truthful with me. I had to learn it from someone else. And I hate that."

"You mean…"

"It's not just hugging, is it, Ren?"

He looked her in the eye before turning his attention to the floor. "No, it's not."

"You still see me as a child, don't you?"

"What are you saying?"

"You couldn't even tell me the truth. If I had to hear it at all, I would want it to be from you!" Just one tear rolled down her cheek.

"Pin-Mei, I…"

"Fine then, let's just do it now and get it over with. Maybe then you won't see me as a child." She started taking off her nightgown.

"Whoa, whoa, WHOA!" He grabbed her arms and forced them down, then wrapped his arms around her tightly to keep her from trying it again. Before speaking to her he took a moment to digest what had just happened. He needed to calm down.

"Listen, I'm sorry I wasn't entirely truthful with you. I thought I was doing the right thing by trying to protect you from the whole truth until you were a little bit older. I didn't think it'd be such a big deal.

"But don't go and say that we're going to do this now just because we can. If there's one time when I was truthful it was when I said that you'll regret it if you jump into it without thinking. Think about it: if you're mad at me, we can't really concentrate on what that act really means, can we?"

She was really crying now. "No…"

"Right, so wait. You'll enjoy it a lot more that way.

"And I don't see you as a child. If I did, I wouldn't treat you the way I do. I wouldn't have even _tried_ to explain it to you if I felt that way. So don't think stupid things like that, okay?"

She nodded through her tears. "Okay…"

He released her and looked at her face. He took his hand and wiped away her tears. "Don't cry so much. You're much prettier when you smile." She looked surprised, but he walked past her before he could see it. "Let's go to bed. We've had too much excitement for one day." He got into his bed and went under the covers.

She bit her lip and went over to his bed. "Ren?"

He turned over to look at her. "What?"

"C-can I…sleep with you again tonight?"

He smiled at her. "Yes."

She didn't move. "And…Can I…sleep with you tomorrow too?"

He studied her. "Yeah, if you really want to."

"I do."

She still wouldn't get in. "Anything else?"

"Can I sleep with you when we go back?"

He sat up and stared at her. "Why are you asking for this all of a sudden?"

She blushed. "I just really felt…content being that close to you."

He could take this so many ways. He _did_ love her, but neither of them had said it to the other. Could things escalate without that happening?

"Is it really that important to you?"

She came to kneel before him on the bed. "Yes…it is…"

"Why?" He already knew the answer.

She leaned forward and cupped his cheek. Her eyes were glossy from crying and seemed to sparkle as she spoke again. "Because...Because I love you."

He touched her face. "I love you too."

Her eyes widened as if she hadn't expected him to reciprocate her words. He pulled her arm, bringing her closer until their noses were almost touching. Their lips connected, and he laid her down next to him on the bed, keeping her in a tight embrace. He wanted so much to touch her, but he knew it wasn't time yet. One night, he wouldn't stop her like he did tonight. They would do so much more than hug…but she wasn't ready…and he was willing to wait.


	16. POP!

Longest chapter yet. Took me two days to write. We all saw it coming (at least I think). So here it is…

Fluff Chapter Part Deux

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixteen: POP!**

* * *

The next morning, instead of waking up alarmed, Ren was able to smile and pull Pin-Mei close against him. He wrapped his arms around her stomach, and then…

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

Pin-Mei sat up, lost her balance, and fell off of the bed and onto the floor.

"You're such a jerk, Ren!" she yelled.

He chuckled. "It's your own fault for getting so excited so easily."

"Don't you DARE tickle me again!"

"I won't if you keep your guard up."

"I was sleeping!"

"Not my problem."

She pouted and he went over and knelt beside her. "I thought you weren't going to act like a child," he said with a cocky smile.

She saw her fault, but tried not to waver. "I don't care."

He put his hands a few inches away from her ribs. "Don't make me tickle you again. I won't be gentle this time."

"No, no, NO!"

Too late. He attacked her and she was reduced to a crumpled ball on the floor, gasping for air. Finally, he let her up.

"I'm going to go make breakfast," he said. She was too breathless to protest, so Ren was able to perform his task in peace.

As he was cooking he heard the shower turn on. He tiptoed over to the door and pressed his ear against it. He could hear her get in.

_Perfect._

Ren went over to the phone to set his plan into motion.

"Yes, make sure that no one else comes in. Don't worry, I'll pay you for it."

He hung up and dialed another number.

"You're absolutely sure it's going to snow? Alright, then. Just make sure it's really clean. Immaculate. If it wasn't sand, I'd ask you to make sure it was sparkling."

He heard the shower shut off and he hung up the phone. A few minutes later she emerged from the bathroom, dressed, but her braids were not in yet. As she moved to begin the process Ren stopped her.

"What?"

"Don't," he said holding her wrist. "I want you to wear it down today."

She met his gaze and her mind started racing. She couldn't remember the last time she had worn her hair down. It had always been in braids.

"Why…?"

"Because I like it like this." He put his hand through her hair. "It makes you look older, more mature, and I like that."

She blushed at the thought of being mature. Her eyes drifted away from him. "O-okay…"

He smiled and kissed her cheek. "Thanks. I promise I'll do something nice for you today to show my appreciation." She nodded, still red from his words.

He was doing this on purpose. He wanted to put her in a dreamy mood, even if it was out of character for him. Tonight, everything had to be perfect. He had to make sure she'd never forget this day for as long as she lived.

"You hungry?" he said casually. She nodded, still under his spell. "Well come on then. I worked hard on this, so don't go letting get cold." She nodded again and sat down and began to eat the plate of French toast, sausages, and hardboiled eggs in front of her.

"You made a lot today," she said softly.

"Yeah, just felt like it. I wanted to make you something that you probably don't get to have a lot of."

"Oh." She bit down on her fork even though it was emptied of food. He could tell she was still red because she dipped her head down in an effort to hide her face with her hair.

He liked teasing her, that much was true, but even when she acted like this with no effort on his part, it was still what some would call "cute".

"Hurry up," he said. "We have a lot to do today."

"Alright." She got up to put her plate in the sink, but he took it from her.

"Allow me," he said as he removed the plate from her hands and put it in the water filled tub. "Go put on something nice. I'm taking you out today, and casual just won't do."

She nodded quickly and ran back into their room.

"I am just too good at this."

* * *

"Where are we going first, Ren?"

"Tokyo Tower."

"Is it big?"

"Oh yes."

"I don't like heights that much."

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you."

"Thank you..."

She grasped his hand as they entered the elevator. He looked over at her to see that she had squeezed her eyes shut, afraid of the ride.

"Hey, don't you trust me?"

She opened her eyes. "What?"

"I told you I'd protect you, but you're still scared. Do you not trust me?"

She looked ashamed. "I…I do."

"Then you have no reason to be afraid."

The elevator stopped and he led her out onto the platform. Pin-Mei looked around.

"There's no one here. Is this place unpopular or something?"

"Maybe…Come here, look over the railing."

"I'll fall!"

He smirked. "Not just by looking, fool."

She whimpered and did as he said. Suddenly, he picked her up and set her on the bottom railing. She got nervous.

"Don't worry. I've got you."

She was shaking, but she breathed deeply and tried to calm down. "Okay."

He held her tighter. "Instead of looking down, look forward so you can see the city."

She did, and smiled.

"What do you see?"

"There's a park on top of a building…and there's a huge TV screen on the side of another building…I think I can see someone having a concert...I think I hear it…and…wow…some sunlight is streaking through some clouds…It's so pretty…"

He smiled. "See? Being up high isn't so bad, now is it?" He put her back down on the ground.

"No…It's not…"

"Do you think you can trust me now?"

She hugged him. "Yes. Yes I can."

He patted her, then gently pushed her away. "Come on, we have other things to do."

"Like what?" she asked as they walked into the street.

"We're going to that electronic store." He pointed to a shop named _Ingo_. "There's something I want to get you."

"What?"

"You'll see."

He walked down an aisle, grabbed a box, paid for it, and they left the store. When they reached a rest area, he opened the box and handed her a minicomputer. She looked it over curiously.

"What is it?"

"It's a translator. You can translate Chinese to Japanese and back again. I thought you'd like it so you won't feel so lost."

She smiled again and hugged him. "Thank you!"

He patted her head again. "You're welcome. Now there are still a couple of things to do before we go to dinner." He held her hand as they started walking down the street.

"Where are we going now?"

"I'm going to take you to get your picture taken."

She looked confused. "Why?"

They entered a studio. He turned to her.

"So I can look at you even when you're not there."

As her face turned red again, a tall, pretty woman came up to her and touched her shoulder. "Are you ready?"

"She is," Ren answered for her. As the woman led her away, Pin-Mei looked alarmed.

"Ren, what's going on?"

"Don't worry. Just do what she says."

She kept looking back at him until they took her into a room and closed the door. He sat on the couch in the lobby and waited. He took out the box and opened it to look at the ring. It was in its place. Sparkling. Perfect. He closed it and let his head tip back until he was staring at the ceiling. He closed his eyes.

"Please…just let this go well…"

* * *

About forty minutes later, a studio aid gently shook him awake. He opened his eyes and stretched as he stood up.

"Sorry. I must have fallen asleep."

"No problem, sir, but Kiriya-san (the photographer) wanted me to tell you that she's ready. Come with me."

Ren followed him into a hallway which led to an outside garden. It was lush with cherry blossom trees, green grass, and a crystal clear lake. He looked around and saw Pin-Mei standing on a small arched bridge.

"Pin-Mei!"

She heard him and turned around. She smiled and gave a small wave, but then quickly turned back around. As he approached the bridge, he saw what she was embarrassed about.

She had been dressed in a dark purple kimono with white butterflies and a red obi. Her long hair had been pulled back a large clip with a butterfly on it. A little bit of makeup was on her face: lipstick, blush, and mascara.

"Just as I thought," he said.

She turned around, startled. "What do you mean?"

He touched a piece of her now wavy hair and trailed it down to her forearm. He pulled her closer to him. "You look beautiful," he said, and kissed her forehead.

"S-stop teasing me…" she said quietly.

He chortled in her ear. "I'm not teasing."

Kiriya walked up to them. "We're ready to begin shooting." He looked at Pin-Mei's face and frowned. "They put too much blush on again. I swear..." He turned and walked away, probably to scold the makeup people.

Ren smirked at her. "No, I really don't think that's it."

Pin-Mei just tried to hide her face with a fan she had been given. He decided that he had to get her out of the funk he had put her in.

"Pin-Mei."

She lowered the fan a little. "W-what?"

"Make sure these come out good, because they're expensive and I'm not going to throw down all my money for them if they're not perfect."

She closed the fan and pouted. "Why do you have to be so mean?"

"I'm not being mean at all. I'm merely motivating you to look good in these pictures. Just do that for me, alright? I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"When?"

"Tonight. Promise."

She was still pouting. "Fiiine."

He watched her trot over to where the cameras were. Kiriya seemed to tell her to smile a little more, at which time she tried but just couldn't do it. He rolled his eyes.

"Brat. Just because I teased her." He walked over to her. "Hey, I forgot something."

"What?"

As she turned to face him, he moved in and softly placed his lips on hers.

"That's what. Now take some good pictures for me. It shouldn't be hard for you."

She nodded silently, still under his spell. Satisfied, he walked away and watched her from afar as she easily smiled when told to.

Although they didn't tell him to, he smiled also.

* * *

When they had finished, Ren decided it was finally time to head to the restaurant he had chosen for dinner. As they walked, Pin-Mei once again stopped short.

"What have I told you about doing this?"

"What's that?" She pointed to a large booth on the sidewalk.

"Hm?" He looked and saw what she was pointing to. "They call that a Club Photo booth. You get your picture taken and they make it into a lot of stickers so you can stick them everywhere."

Her eyes lit up. She grabbed his arm. "Can we do it? Please?"

"You can."

"No! I want to have you there with me."

"Why?"

"Because I only have that picture from ten years ago…I want a new one so I can have you with me, too…I mean…I got my picture taken for you." She looked a little sad. "I just want to be able to look at you whenever I want to, too."

He sighed. With her pleading face, he just couldn't say no to her. "Okay, but ONE sheet. No more."

"Will you smile?"

"What?"

"Will you smile in the picture?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to be able to look at it and think that I made you happy."

He was a little taken aback by her answer. Before she could get a look at him, he turned his face away from her. "Fine, but only because you asked me to."

She smiled. "Thank you."

"Come on, let's get this over with."

"Yay!" she skipped into the booth, yanking him along with her, and they went through the program.

"Wow! You can choose a frame! This is so cool!"

"Calm down."

She chose a butterfly frame, then sat back, looking pleased with herself.

"What is it with you and butterflies?"

"Well…since you bought me the hair clips, they make me think of you."

His cheeks got a little hot, but she didn't notice.

"Look! They're gonna take the picture now!"

He looked up and saw the countdown on the screen. He had promised her a smile, and he couldn't break his word. Just before the picture was taken, he wrapped his arm around her

and smiled.

It wasn't forced. It wasn't to tease her. It wasn't because she was acting cute.

It was something else.

* * *

"That food was good!" Pin-Mei said as they left the restaurant.

"Well, I thought you should try something new."

"Hehe. I liked it!"

"I can tell."

They arrived at a beach. No one else was there. They walked to the edge and looked out over the moonlit water.

"I don't think I've ever had this much fun before. This has been the greatest week I've ever had." She paused. "And to think I thought that I wouldn't get to see you."

"Why would you think that?"

"It's just happened so many times before. I would be scheduled to come and spend time with you…but something would always happen and it would be canceled."

He looked at her. Now he was interested. "Like when?"

"Six years ago. You got sick, and my father didn't want me to get sick also."

"What else?"

"I was supposed to visit the following year, but father forgot."

"He _forgot_?"

"Yes, that's what I was told."

There was a pause.

"Any other time?"

She was quiet for a few seconds. "The last time we were supposed to come before this was three years ago so we could celebrate you coming home from the Shaman Fight. At the last minute, your mother called and told us that there was a family problem, and that it would be best if I wasn't there." She looked at the sand. "I was so disappointed…I think I might have cried."

He looked at her with a bit of pain in his eyes. That "family problem" was when he rebelled against his father and finally decided to change himself for the better.

_I could have met her sooner…_

"You wouldn't have liked the person I was then," he said.

"I sincerely doubt that." She gave a small smile. "I remember feeling so happy when my father told me I'd get to see you again, that I almost wanted to cry. You were only six the last time I saw you, and I liked you then, so I know I would have liked you three years ago."

"Your father must have been disappointed when I didn't win."

"Maybe…but I couldn't care less about being Shaman Queen or anything like that. It doesn't guarantee us happiness." She looked out at the water and giggled. "I almost want to go in."

"You can't. It's too cold. You'd get sick."

She looked up at him. "Would you take care of me?"

His heart was beating so fast and loud he swore she'd be able to hear it. He took a deep breath.

_Now._

"You tell me I always have, so why would I stop then?"

"I don't know…"

"In fact, I don't think I ever want to stop."

She felt his body move and she turned to him.

But he was getting down on the ground.

On one knee.

With an open box.

With a ring inside.

Pin-Mei froze and clasped her hands over her mouth. "Ren…what…"

It started snowing. She looked around, up at the sky, trying to let this all sink in. He just looked up at her and smiled.

"Our time here together has changed me in a way that I never thought possible. I wanted so much to see you smile, to hear you laugh, just to see you happy…I've never felt that way before…about anyone. I didn't mind having you around, having you watch me, having you touch me… When you weren't there, when I thought that I was going to lose you, I felt so empty inside for those few hours that for the first time in a long time, I cried. I realized that I need you to be with me.

"Now that I've been with you, and spent time with you, and learned all about you, I know that you're the one. You accepted me even when I was full of hatred, and you accept me now. You said that you felt content sleeping next to me. You know what I felt? I felt complete. I can't let another person try to take you away from me. I want to claim you for myself. Now.

"So will you fulfill this selfish desire of mine and stay with me forever? Will you allow me the pleasure of being able to call you mine? Pin-Mei, will you marry me?"

She just kept looking at him, tears flowing and just totally losing it. "Ren…"

"At least you're not calling me Niisama anymore, or this would be awkward."

He succeeded in making her laugh through her tears, calming her down.

"Do you remember the question, or do I need to ask again?"

Even though she was still crying, she smiled. "Ask me again."

"Will you marry me?"

She nodded quickly. "Yes."

He continued smiling as he took the glove from her left hand and slipped the ring on it. As he stood up, he held it so she could see it.

"The cut of the center diamond is called a princess cut." He looked into her eyes. "And that's the way I'm going to treat you for the rest of our lives…like a princess."

When they got home, they went straight to Ren's bed. He kissed her neck as he pulled her close to him. She fell asleep with a burning sensation in her that she had never experienced. When she told him about it, he had a simple answer.

"It's something that I'll remedy soon enough...and you're going to love every second of it."


	17. Reactions

You thought it was over. You thought they were just going to go back to China, get married, have sex, and have children. Happily ever after, right?

That would be all too easy.

After they go back to China, we get to the part of the story that was originally going to happen after Ren taught Pin-Mei to swim. This story would have been much shorter. Hell, it'd already be over. The trip to Tokyo wasn't in my original plans. That's right. I've been making this up as I went along O.o;;

Ren and Pin-Mei weren't even supposed to kiss at this point in the story, never mind telling each other they love each other and proposing formally. Yeah, I realized that I didn't have enough chemistry going. When someone said, "Is he going to propose? That'd be so sweet!" I was like, "Hm… not a bad idea…"

So yes, I want to thank all of you again. If it wasn't for you guys, this may have been another one of my forgotten stories. I really can't believe it's already been a month since I began this story…time flies, ne? (Hopefully it'll be Christmas/Channukah/other religious holiday soon). I'll be forever grateful to your support and the wonderful reviews I receive.

So no, we do still have a ways to go. If you're crying now, I guarantee that you'll be crying in the end.

I'm not even kidding.

**Notes: As of September 2011, the British Pound amount in this chapter is equal to about $2970. Economy strikes again.**

**Why yes, that is another snipe at the 4Kids dub. My grudge knows no bounds.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventeen: Reactions**

* * *

"Was last night a dream?"

"It wasn't."

"Are you sure?"

They were lying in bed together as the early morning sun tried to peek through the curtains. With no plans for the day, seeing as they were leaving that night, they were in no rush to get up.

"Look at your hand." He held it so she could see it clearly. She looked at it and her eyes welled up again.

"I'm so glad."

"Hey, stop crying."

"Sorry…"

He held her close and stroked her hair. "Don't apologize. There's no need to."

"I just never thought that you would propose. I didn't think it was necessary…"

"I want to make sure you know that this isn't something that's forced. To me, it's not arranged anymore. I'm going to marry you not because I have to, but because I want to. I meant what I said last night. I want to make you mine."

"Ren…"

He closed his eyes for a few moments, taking in the sound of her voice, then opened them.

"I love hearing you say my name."

She smiled at him. "Well, I love saying it."

He kissed her lips and all around her face. He moved up to her ears and then down her neck, stopping just below her collarbone. After a slight pause, he put his hand under her nightgown and gently stroked her back. She shivered at his touch.

"Your hands are softer than I thought they'd be," she whispered. "It feels nice." She closed her eyes.

"Don't you dare go back to sleep."

"But even if I do, you'll stay here beside me, next to me, right?"

He smiled. "Of course. Only because you're hopeless on your own."

"Good." She put her arms around his neck and pressed herself against him, wanting to be as close as possible.

The feeling of her body against his, being able to feel the warmth and every detail of her body... He blushed even more at the thought of her feeling all the same things from his. She felt so soft against his chest…it was driving him crazy.

He finally put his hand behind her head, his other reaching around her to rest on her hip.

"Ren…"

"What?"

"Can we…stay a little longer?"

"Why?"

"I want to be with you more—alone."

Alone…she wanted to be alone with him…just the two of them in one bed, together just like this. All he wanted was to wake up this way for the rest of his life—with her.

He stiffened as he felt her hands slowly running down his back. Their feathery touch beginning to awaken a near-dormant feeling inside of him.

"Pin-Mei…" he gasped, his voice barely audible.

This was too much for him. He was getting too excited. He could feel the hand on her hip start to slip as she kissed his chest. He had to stop.

"I'll go make breakfast," he said as he hastily pushed her away and left the room.

Once in the kitchen, he leaned over a counter, breathing heavily. He wiped his forehead, then looked at his hand.

_Sweat?_ He looked towards their room. _What's wrong with me?_ _When did she make me react like this? She's too innocent…I can't think about her like this...especially after what those bastards tried to do to her._

It was then that the impact of their difference in age hit him. He was a sixteen year old boy, almost a man, with raging hormones and sudden urges abound. She was just fourteen, barely developed at all and oblivious to the internal battle he was fighting. She hadn't even known what sex was. To even have fleeting thoughts about her like that…it nearly disgusted him. But then, he wasn't some old pervert. He was thinking these things because he loved her, and he wanted to share that experience with her.

_I want her. I want her so I can be good to her._

"Ren? Is something wrong?"

He jumped, slipped, and fell to the floor, bashing his head on the counter on his way down. Pin-Mei hurriedly knelt down in front of him. He was holding his head.

"Ren! Are you okay?"

"Ow."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come up behind you. I was just worried that I upset you or something. Here, I'll make it better."

She stood on her knees and kissed his forehead. She lowered herself again and smiled. After looking at her closed-eyed smile, he couldn't help but smile himself.

"Alright, I'll take you someplace else."

"Really? Where?"

"London."

* * *

"All this stuff is so big!"

"Everything's big to you- you're small."

"Meanie!"

It hadn't taken very long for them to arrive at Ren's English flat. Pin-Mei was quick to notice how different it looked from his condo in Japan.

"Hehe. There's just one big bed. Now we won't be pressed for space."

"Honestly, is sleeping all you ever think about?"

She turned to look at him, her hands behind her back and a small blush on her face. "Nope." She twirled behind him. "I think about you all the time."

"Maybe it's because you're always with me."

"Doesn't mean that I have to think about you."

"Hmph."

"You've been so serious lately. Lighten up! Come on, can we go somewhere?"

He thought for a moment. "We need to get you a jacket. It's too cold here for you."

She looked nervous. "Are you sure we'll be able to find something that fits me?"

"If we can't, I'll have one custom tailored. I don't want you to get sick."

"Ren…"

"Partially because I don't know how to deal with sick people."

"Ren!"

* * *

They walked the streets in search of a store to buy a coat from. Finally, Pin-Mei pointed to a store called _Browns_ (Ren was pleased that she actually used her words instead of just suddenly stopping). She instantly attached herself to a cream colored cashmere and wool coat with fur around the collar. To her surprise, she had no trouble fitting into it.

"Oh. My. Gosh. IT FITS!"

"Shh! This is a public place!"

"Oh...sorry."

"Let me just pay for the bloody coat so we can leave."

She stared at him.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing." She handed him the coat.

As he went to pay for it, she hid herself so she could watch him.

"So, how much is this?"

"The coat is £1850, sir."

"Choosing the cheap stuff again…Alright, here you are."

"Thank you, sir."

Ren took the coat and turned to bump into Pin-Mei.

"What the devil do you think you're doing, coming up behind me again like that?" She just grinned at him. "What?"

"You started using a British accent!"

"I most certainly did not!"

"You're still using it now."

"I still don't believe you."

"Either way, it makes me like your voice even more."

"There you go again, saying mushy things like that."

She frowned, but then put on her new coat. She twirled, showing it to him. Smiling, she ran and hugged him. "Thank you!"

"Yes, yes, you're welcome." He patted her, then turned her around and moved her towards the door. She went ahead outside, as he reflected on what she had just said.

"_It makes me like your voice even more."_

_Even more?_ he thought. _Does that mean that she likes my voice anyway?_

He shrugged it off as best he could, and headed out of the store. Pin-Mei turned around and smiled at him.

Suddenly, someone dressed in black grabbed her.

"Fuck, not again." He ran after him, taking out his Kwan Dao in the process. It didn't take long for Ren to catch to the man, and he quickly knocked him down. When he had Pin-Mei safely behind him, her arms around his waist as per his command so he would know instantly if someone else tried to take her, he pointed his weapon at the would-be kidnapper. The man was on his back, and the blade was a mere five inches from his face.

"I'm going to ask you a few questions. You are going to answer them quickly and completely. Refuse, and I kill you right here and now.

"Question one: What do you want with Pin-Mei?"

"Kiss my ass!" the man sneered.

Ren pushed the blade a little closer. "You know, your head would look nice over my fire place."

The man looked a little nervous. He was starting to sweat. "We was told to get that girl from some guy who was paying my boss a lot of money for her. That guy who hired the boss was all secretive-like. He never let anyone see him. The guy never said why he wanted the broad in the first place!"

"You have less than three seconds to take back the 'broad' comment." He let the blade cut the man's face a little. The man flailed.

"I'm sorry, man! Just don't kill me! Please!"

"Alright, then. Question Two: Who's this "boss" of yours?"

"He was in charge of a syndicate in Japan, but some bastard went in and killed everyone, so the boss had to come here instead."

Ren smirked. "Interesting. Question Three: Where'd this client of yours come from?"

"I can't tell you that! The boss'd have my head!"

"Would you rather _I _have your head instead?"

With the side of the side of the blade tapping his cheek, he broke down. "China! He came from China!"

Ren and Pin-Mei froze, their eyes wide. Someone from their own country was following them in an effort to abduct her. Who could it be? Did they have a traitor in their midst? Or was this someone only Pin-Mei knew?

Ren could feel her hold on him tighten. He couldn't blame her for being scared. Someone obviously wanted her, and was using gangs to get what they wanted. He patted her interlocked hands on his stomach as if to comfort her.

"Okay, Last Question: Who sent you?"

BANG!

Ren blinked. When he went to look at the man, he found that he would not get his answer.

His head had exploded, shot from a far off rooftop.

"Ren…" Pin-Mei whimpered, clutching him tighter. Her face instantly turned pale. Her trembling became even worse when she noticed that some blood had splattered on her coat.

"Don't look." He covered her eyes, then turned her around toward home.

* * *

When they got into bed that night, Pin-Mei was visibly trembling.

"Don't worry," Ren said in a gentle voice, stroking her cheek. "I won't let them take you. Not now, not ever. I want you with me always, and I won't let anyone get in the way of that."

"Ren…"

"You can sleep peacefully. I'll protect you, no matter what."

"Thank you…" She held him tight like she had done that morning. "I love you."

He kissed her lips, then on her neck. "I know."

Pin-Mei wasn't shaking anymore.


	18. Temptations

This is random, but I don't remember Ren even cooking in the series…

You may notice that sometimes quotes used in thoughts/flashbacks from previous chapters don't match. I do this on purpose, because sometimes the new quote fits better than the old one, but gets the same point across. It's done in anime all the time.

**Notes: This chapter has slight lime implications. Don't worry, I'd warn you if it was anything serious.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighteen: Temptations**

* * *

The next time Ren opened his eyes, it wasn't morning. It was still night - three. He looked beside him and saw that he was alone. He immediately sat up and looked about the room.

Pin-Mei wasn't there.

He briskly walked out of the bedroom and into the living room. He breathed a sigh of relief. She was standing in front of a large window looking out over the city.

"Don't scare me like that. I didn't know where you went."

"Sorry…Did I wake you?"

"No, my instinct did. I was told you weren't in bed."

"Is that so?" She still hadn't turned from the window. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her; one around her chest, the other, her waist.

"Why are you up?"

"Couldn't sleep…I felt sorry for that man."

"But he tried to kidnap you."

"It doesn't mean that I wanted him to die."

He waited. Something still didn't seem right.

"That can't be all. What else is bothering you?"

She was silent for a moment.

"Maybe I should just go with them."

"What?"

"I don't want anyone to get hurt because of me, especially not you."

He released her and spun her around. "Why do you always think that sacrificing yourself will solve things? It will never solve things! If anything, it just gives people incentive to do more evil deeds." He released her shoulders and drooped his head, his bangs hiding his eyes.

"Besides…do you think I'd be okay with that? I'd rather die fighting to save you than be without you. I wouldn't be happy if you were gone. I haven't put all my energy into you just so someone else can take you away from me."

"Ren…"

"I'm going back to bed," he said, and left the room.

Pin-Mei stared after him. _I'm such a fool…_ She followed him.

He was about to get back into the bed when she came in.

"Ren."

He stopped, but didn't look at her.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to act like being with you meant nothing to me. Please forgive me."

"It's alright," he said flatly. He continued to get in bed. She quickly walked over and clutched him from behind.

"Please…don't be angry with me…I know that I never think before I say those things, and that it hurts you when I act like I don't want to be with you, but I do. You know I do. If I didn't, I wouldn't have accepted this ring." She closed her left hand into a fist and gently grazed his chest with the diamonds. "I do want to be with you. I mean it."

He gripped her right arm and flipped her onto the bed, him on top. As a blush covered her face, he leaned to whisper in her ear.

"Be more selfish," he told her. "And you should cover yourself more, then you won't be so cold. I can handle harsh temperatures, and it's clear you can't." He ran a hand down the side of her body. She shivered. He placed his forehead on hers. A sly grin appeared on his face. "Don't worry, I'll keep you plenty warm."

She turned her head away, trying to hide her face, but he gently turned it back to his. "Promise me you'll stay in bed, alright?" Pin-Mei nodded hastily. He smirked. "Heh, good girl." He kissed her gently, then calmly sat up and rolled over. "Good night."

_Gods, she's so much fun to tease._

* * *

Ren woke up the next morning and opened the curtain.

"Looks like today's going to be a little warmer," he said. "We can do a lot more today than yesterday. What do you want to do?" Pin-Mei said nothing. "Pin-Mei?" He turned around to the bed.

She was huddled under a lump of covers. He ripped them off of her.

"Rise and shine. Let's not waste the day away."

She wouldn't even move. He shook her.

"Come on. I'm making breakfast and you better come out here soon." He walked towards the door.

"…coming…"

He turned around. "Jeez, finally. You're so slow in the morning." Pin-Mei walked slowly towards him, but suddenly started falling. "Hey!" He ran and grabbed her before she hit the ground. "What's up with you? You're so clumsy."

"…sorry…"

Then he turned her over and saw her heavy-lidded eyes and red cheeks. He could feel a tremendous amount of heat radiating from her body.

"Hey…"

He touched her face, then her forehead, then put his cheek on her forehead to double-check what he felt.

"Pin-Mei, are you sick?"

She probably hadn't heard him. All she could do was mumble. "…I promise I'll stay in bed this time…I promise…" She was shivering.

He picked her up and placed her on the bed. Then, he did the only thing he could do at that point…

"Mom?"

"Ren, dear, what is it?"

"I think Pin-Mei's sick."

"Well, what's going on?"

"She's really hot."

"Yes, dear, but what are the symptoms?"

"I just said one."

"Oh. Well, what else is she doing?"

"Shivering."

"She definitely has a fever."

"…What should I do?"

"Well, if she's shivering, you'll have to dress her in something warm."

"But-But—!"

"Get a hold of yourself. If she continues to shiver, then she'll just get worse. Don't give her coffee or tea. Give her water, juice, and soup. Don't let her get up until she's feeling better, or else she'll just fall asleep on the rug. Just keep an eye on her, and she should be fine."

"But what will I do if _I_ get sick?"

"You've always had a strong immune system, so you should be fine. Call me if you need more help."

He hung up. Gods, why was it always him? And it wasn't like his mother didn't tell him anything he didn't know already. Why the information had suddenly left him, he didn't know. He went back to the room and looked at her. She was curled up in a ball, still shivering. He didn't like seeing her like that, but the thought of dressing her wasn't all that attractive, either. Knowing his luck she'd wake up in the middle of it, then things would get really ugly.

"Get a hold of yourself, Ren!" he told himself. "She's your fiancée, doing something like this shouldn't be such a big deal! You want to help her, don't you?"

He took a deep breath and got some of his old winter pajamas out. It was hard finding a pair that wasn't made of silk, but he finally found a cotton set. He turned back to the bed and breathed again. It was now or never.

Once he was on the bed, he propped her up and sat behind her. As he began to remove her nightgown, he could only think about what happened a few nights ago.

"_Let's just do it now! I'll show you that I'm not a child!"_

He froze as the image filled his mind, clear as crystal...along with what could have happened if he hadn't stopped her. Once he realized what he was thinking about, he shook it off and tried to finish his task quickly.

When he had finally removed the small silk dress, he took the dark blue pajama top and put it over her head. Then he realized her arms were under it, and not in the sleeves. He was going to have to go under and stick them through.

"Fuck my life."

With a red face, he reached under the shirt and gingerly touched each arm and put them in their respective sleeves. He hurriedly put the pants on, and then ran off to make some soup.

_Glad that's over. Heh. Most guys would think I was an idiot for hating something like that so much. Well, excuse me for my sense of pride and reason._

When it was ready, he put a lid over it and kept the burner on warm. He went and turned on the TV, just to pass the time. Just as Ren was about to learn how not to be seen, he heard a strained whisper of his name. He jumped up and ran back to the room.

"Pin-Mei?"

She was laying down in their bed under the covers, her eyes half open, and still visibly feverish. When she saw him she smiled faintly.

"There you are. Now I know how you feel when you wake up and I'm not there."

He went over to her and sat in a chair he had placed on the right of the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I have a fever."

"Oh, really?"

"Yup."

"Gee, I wonder why."

She giggled a little, then just smiled at him. "I'm so lucky to have someone like you to take care of me," she said. "I've always wanted to know what it felt like to be taken care of like this by my mother."

"Well, if it helps any, I had to call mine to know what to do."

She smiled again. "Thanks."

She reached her hand out a little, and he took it in both of his.

"I'm so lucky," she said again, her voice seemingly giving out.

He smiled and brushed back her bangs to feel her head again. "I'm going to take your temperature." He stuck the thermometer in her mouth, removing it after it beeped. "100.7. Not the worst it could be."

He stood up to put it away, but felt a tug on his wrist. He looked back to see Pin-Mei clutching him as tight as she could manage in her state. Her eyes conveyed a sense of urgent yearning that he didn't remember seeing before.

"What? You don't want me to go?" She shook her head. "Fine, I guess I _won't_ go put this away."

As he was about to sit back down in the chair, Pin-Mei used what seemed to be all of her strength to pull him on top of her.

"Pin-Mei…what…?"

As soon as his body landed on hers, a shot rang out and a bullet hit the wall where he had been standing. Ren looked at the hole in the wall in disbelief, then at her.

"Pin-Mei…you knew that was going to happen?"

She hesitated, then nodded and pointed out the window to a figure standing on a nearby rooftop.

"I see…"

He put a blanket around her and gently put her in one of the room's large closets.

"Don't worry, I'll be right back. I'm going to get that person."

He grabbed his Kwan Dao and jumped out the window and onto one of the rooftops. Looking up, he could see the dark figure that had fired the shot aimed at him. He jumped across the roofs and landed in front of his adversary.

"You have a lot of nerve coming after me like that, you bastard," he said.

The figure chuckled. "Don't flatter yourself. We were merely trying to kill you because it'd be so much easier to retrieve the Xu girl that way."

"What do you want with her?"

"It is what Master Kai desires, so I will carry out his will."

"Over my dead body. Or maybe yours." There was a glint in his eye. "Yes, that sounds much better."

"Heh heh. No wonder Master Kai wishes you dead. Your sadistic attitude is quite annoying."

"Sorry, but my fiancée seems to like it, so I'm not going to be changing my ways anytime soon," Ren said with a smirk. He raised his Kwan Dao and charged at him.

The man brandished a sword and crossed blades with him. "I'm the only one left here to kill you. If you can defeat me, then you may be able to have a few more days of peace."

"Well then, I'll be seeing you."

Ren pulled on the last attachment of the pole end of the Kwan Dao. A Kodachi appeared and he thrust it through the man's heart, killing him instantly.

"-Not."

He kicked him off the roof, allowing his to land on the street below, then made his way back through the window. Pin-Mei was right where he left her.

"It's alright. He's gone. You can come out now."

Pin-Mei squinted at his shirt and reached out to touch it. He looked down and saw that there was a bit of blood on it. A little nervous, he waited for her reaction.

She looked sad for a moment, as if mourning the man's death, then smiled and pulled out a small sign that read "Xie Xie".

He smiled at her. "You're welcome." Then he thought about what had just happened. "Where did you get that sign?"

She pointed to a hole in the back of the closet. A sign above it read, "OBJECT VOID: Take item to be used in scenes where they would otherwise be unavailable."

"What the hell is that doing in the back of my closet?" She shrugged. He stared at it, unsure of what to make of it. "...Yeah, how about some soup?" She nodded.

He carried her to the bed and set her down, then retrieved a bowl of soup from the kitchen. She ate it slowly as he watched. When she was done, he took it from her and put it in the sink.

"Something just occurred to me, Ren," she said when he came back, her voice restored. "Did you dress me?"

His face burned up more than her fever. Busted.

"Um, yes I did…but I didn't do anything! You know that old saying when you go into a porcelain store: look but don't touch! I mean…WAIT WAIT NO! I didn't look! Honestly, I didn't! I had to reach under the shirt to pull your arms through the sleeves but I DID NOT touch ANYTHING! I didn't even want to! Not to say you're not cute or anything! I mean, you ARE cute, but I wouldn't take advantage of you while you were sleeping or sick! I wouldn't do it while you were awake and well either! I…GAH!" He covered his head as he screamed.

Pin-Mei smiled and went to go sit on his lap. He uncovered himself as she placed her hand on his cheek and lowered him so she could whisper in his ear.

"Thank you. I know I can trust you not to touch me…By the way…you're really cute when you're flustered." She kissed him under his ear and put her head on his chest. Ren was digesting her words.

_I'm cute?_

* * *

She was feeling better by the time they went to bed. As they lay together, Ren wanted to ask her if she knew who "Master Kai" was, and if she knew why he might want her so badly, but he didn't. Something told him to keep it quiet for now.

He was brought out of his thoughts when he felt her snuggle up against him. He looked over at her. Her eyes were open, and she was looking at her engagement ring.

"Are you going to cry again?"

"…No…" But she did.

He smirked at her. "You're hopeless."

"So what if I am?"

"It's okay, I don't mind that much."

She let her hands run down his arms. "Would you think badly of me if I said that I love your body?"

"No…why?"

"Because I do."

He smirked haughtily. "I don't see any reason why you wouldn't."

Silence. Ren knew he was supposed to be saying something.

"I can't say how I feel about yours because you have to keep yourself covered."

"And yet, you could have seen it today."

"I suppose you're right. I don't know…something about you inviting me to see it sounds more enticing. It also takes away the guilt factor."

"Do you want to see?"

"Ye—I mean WHAT?"

She gauged his reaction, then gave a small smile.

"Just kidding…" The enthusiasm wasn't in her voice.

He stared at her. "Don't just show me for no reason. You don't understand what doing something like that does to guys like me."

"What does it do?"

"To be honest, I don't feel comfortable talking about it."

"Oh…I see…"

"There's been too much talk like this lately. I want it to stop. This isn't why I love you." He hugged her close. "Even if your body was horrible and ugly, my feelings wouldn't change. I know better. There's much more to you than the way you look."

"Ren…"

"When the time comes for that, you'll know."

_And at that time, I'll make you the happiest girl in the world._


	19. Another Fear

I apologize if some of you find the story to be slow moving or filler-like at this point. I advise you to enjoy the few humor spots I put in here, because once we spend a couple chapters back in China, the chocolate chips are gonna hit the fan. Ah well, I'm only a writer. Can't please everyone.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Nineteen: Another Fear**

* * *

"Do we really have to go home so soon? You promised we could stay a few more days!"

"Well, almost getting shot in the head wasn't part of my original plan. We're going home—NOW."

After the unexpected attack the day before, Ren had decided it was time to pack up and leave. Pin-Mei, of course, hated the idea, whining that she had wanted to go to Buckingham Palace, but he stood firm and ended up carrying her out.

"I'm not speaking to you," she informed him as they entered his house.

"Oh, sorry for being worried about you getting ABDUCTED or KILLED!"

"You broke your promise!"

"Is that really more important to you than your life?"

"I'd DIE before I broke a promise to anyone!"

"Oh? So what happened to 'I promise to be here when you get back'?"

"Shut up! That wasn't my fault!"

"Still a broken promise!"

"Ahem, Mistress?"

"Bocchama?"

"SHUT UP!" they both cried in unison.

By this time, the quarreling couple had wandered through the house and into the back yard.

"This does not look good, Bason…" Ma Ying said in a nervous tone. "What will we do if they begin to get physical?"

Just as she finished her sentence, she saw Pin-Mei brandish her Dadao and point it at Ren.

"Let's settle this with a duel," she said.

Ren smirked at her. "You're really more foolish than you look. Do you honestly think you have half a chance?"

She only flipped the sword around multiple times in her hands before assuming a fighting stance. "We'll find out, now won't we?"

He took his Kwan Dao from the rack. "Oh yes." He pointed it at her. "I'll give you one last chance to apologize and save yourself some bruises."

"Like I'd do that now."

"Suit yourself. Just bear in mind that I'm not going to go easy on you."

"I wouldn't want it any other way."

She charged him. He scoffed at her.

"Impatience leads to mistakes," he said. He easily dodged and went behind her. She gasped and flipped away to face him.

"Don't act all high and mighty. You haven't won yet!"

"Yet," he repeated. "Just saying that word shows that you already doubt yourself. How can you expect to beat me with that attitude?"

"Grr…You're already pissing me off!"

"Only because you're letting me get under your skin. If you kept your head clear and concentrated more then maybe you'd be doing better."

"My mind is not clouded!"

"I never said it was. Now you're just stating the obvious. Another reason the odds are against you is your weapon in close-range. Since you have to get close to attack me, I can easily slap you away with my long-range weapon."

"Shut up! I'm so sick of hearing you talk!"

She charged him again. Just as she was about to thrust at him, he jumped and flipped over her, putting his hand on her head for leverage. He put his blade under her chin.

"Twice I've been able to get behind you. This is getting a little boring."

Pin-Mei could only stare in front of her with wide eyes, her body slightly shaking.

_I can't believe this…How is he able to dodge so easily? Sure, he's fast, but I'm a girl- I'm supposed to be faster! Calm down, Pin-Mei. Try to remember something!_

"I'm going to give you one more chance. If I get behind you one more time, you lose." He removed the blade and jumped a few meters away from her. "I'll be nice and wait for you to attack first."

_Come on, Pin-Mei, there must be at least ONE fighting form you remember._ She shut her eyes tight so she could think. _A form that is fast, but strong…_ Her eyes shot open. _That's the one!_

"Actually, Ren, I'm having trouble deciding what to do. Can you go first?

He looked at her skeptically. "Have it your way."

He jumped high into the air, using the sun as a shield. Pin-Mei instinctively looked up and was blinded. She regained her vision just in time to roll out of the way.

_Now he'll probably charge…_

He did just as she predicted, and she followed suit. As he raised the Kwan Dao to strike her down, she hit the ground and slid through his legs. She stood and pointed the DaDao at his neck.

"Checkmate," she said triumphantly.

"Nicely done, except…"

He spun and slapped her weapon from her hand.

"You need to actually trap me in order to win."

She looked frantically at her sword a few meters away, then at him. He shrugged.

"Go on. Go get it."

She ran over and was about to grab it when the Kwan Dao blade was once again under her chin. She looked up to see Ren grinning down at her.

"I win," he said.

She sighed and let her hand hit the ground. "Fine, fine. I lose."

He was about to open his mouth to tease her a little more when he was interrupted.

"Lady Pin-Mei! What are you doing on the ground?"

Pin-Mei looked scared. "Uh-oh."

He looked at her, confused. "Uh-oh?"

"Chu Feng… my DaDao instructor."

A man in his twenties ran up to them. He had black hair tied in a long thin ponytail and wore a brown training outfit.

"Lady Pin-Mei, it's time for your lesson. Pick your DaDao up off the ground and get serious."

She sighed and did as she was told. "I can't believe father made you come out here when I'm relaxing."

"Actually no," Feng said in a matter-of-fact tone. "Fan Suo asked me to come."

A momentary look of horror came over her face, but she quickly hid it. Ren saw it before she did, though.

"Who?"

"My grandmother, my mother's mother," she replied with a forced smile. She quickly turned to follow Feng. "I'll see you later."

"Yeah…later…"

* * *

"Jun? Have you see Ren anywhere?"

"I think he went into the library last I saw him."

"Thank you."

She ran down the halls to the wing where the library was, and opened the door.

"Hey, Ren! I'm d-!" She quickly put a hand over her mouth.

At the large desk near the windows of the library, Ren was sleeping, surrounded by books. She giggled as she walked toward him.

_How cute. I guess I never thought of him as the bookworm type._

When she arrived at the desk, she looked at some of the books scattered about its surface. They seemed to be records of Tao ancestors. She wondered why he'd be reading something like this. Even more curious, all the records that he had opened to were of shamanic warriors between the ages of fifteen and seventeen. She picked one up and read it to herself.

"Tao Yi. A young shaman known for his quick thinking, fighting prowess, and speed. Married at the age of fifteen to Qiao Da-Xia. Died two years later while avenging his wife's death at the hands of traitorous family members."

Mildly disturbed, she put the book down and read some of the other records. They all had basically the same story: Great warriors who died young protecting loved ones. When she was done, she looked down at Ren's sleeping face.

"Ren…why would you be reading something like this?"


	20. Zhang's Plea

I'll clear things up here: Bason and Ma Ying remained in China during Ren and Pin-Mei's trip to Japan and London. Remember this. It's important in the future. –wink-

My friend who takes Chinese told me that Qiao (as in Tao Yi's wife from the last chapter) isn't a word. Well, I found it on a site for Chinese surnames and it's in Dynasty Warriors (an awesome video game where you run around ancient China kicking absolute butt), so by default, I'm right…YEAH!

If you haven't noticed, when Pin-Mei gets excited about explaining something, her explanation is one HUGE run-on sentence. I do that on purpose, since she's so full of energy. The cute little fourteen year old, awwwww –pats-

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty: Zhang's Plea**

* * *

After she had stacked the books chronologically by dynasty, she set them off to the side and looked around for a shelf to put them on. As she looked along the shelves, she squinted and saw a spine reading "photos". She smiled and took it out, sitting back on the couch.

There were pictures of Ren's parents meeting, their engagement celebration, and their wedding. Pictures of Jun's birth and younger years soon followed until finally, Ren appeared.

Even as a baby, his expression was serious. Not a single photo had his smile in it. As she turned the page, she saw pictures from her visit ten years ago. She found it a little disappointing that in every shot he was looking away, as if to rebel, whereas she was smiling brightly. She frowned at the dark blue outfit her younger self wore, then at the one she was wearing now.

_I hate this color_

She turned the page. There was a picture of Ren bending down to wrap her in a towel. She looked like she had been crying. Pin-Mei cocked her head at it.

_I don't think I remember this…_

Beside the photo there was a blank space.

_Hehe. This is the picture Ran let me have. It looks so weird having an empty spot there, though…Hey! I know!_

She excitedly took the club photo sticker sheet from a pocket inside her blouse and removed one of them. She carefully placed it in the center of the space and patted it.

_There! All set! Hey, I think this is the first picture in the whole album that he's smiling in. Plus, he's actually looking at the camera._ She gave herself a thumbs-up. _Good job, Pin-Mei! Mission Accomplished! _She thought better of it. _Well, I wasn't aiming for it, but at least it looks nice._ She smiled at the sticker again before closing the album and placing it on the most recent stack.

She looked over at Ren, who was still sleeping. She stood and dusted herself off, getting ready to go help with dinner. After a moment of hesitation, she removed the robe she had been wearing and went to drape it over his shoulders. She indulged herself and poked the top of his tongari with her finger as she left. He moaned slightly and turned over.

A few minutes later, she reappeared with a camera and quickly took a picture of him, then left again, promising to come back to add it to the album the next chance she got.

* * *

"Look who finally decided to wake up!"

The two families turned to see Ren walk into the room just in time for dinner. He was stretching and cracking his arms. As they sat down, Xu Zhang looked across the table at his daughter.

"So, Pin-Mei, how did you like Japan?"

She took a moment to swallow her food and think. Ren looked over at her nervously.

_PLEASE don't mention getting abducted and almost raped and sold. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE._

"Well…"

He kept his eyes on her.

"There was all this snow and stuff called cocoa and watches people buy that have things carved on the inside and vending machines for all sorts of things- I got a weird dvd from one when Ren wasn't looking but he made me throw it out 'cause he said it was dirty- and places where you can buy animals made of porcelain and you can have your picture taken in a weird outfit or in a box and a trafficking company-"

"Trafficking company?"

"Yeah there were these guys and they- ow!" Ren kicked her under the table.

"She means that they showed her how they direct cars and stuff like that. You know those Japanese and their weird drivers."

Zhang seemed unconvinced. "I see…anything else?"

"Um…" Pin-Mei looked at Ren, who looked back at her with a tired expression on his face due to having to think that quickly. Despite his less than romantic gaze, she blushed and looked at her food.

"Um…Did I mention that I bought this really cute bunny!" She held it up over her head, allowing her ring to reflect light across the room. Ren gave her a weird look.

"Were you carrying that around this whole time?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Beca-"

He was interrupted again.

"Oh, Ren! I didn't expect this from you!" his mother cried.

"Wha?"

"You proposed, didn't you? What else would such a brilliant ring be for?"

Ren just looked around the table, trying to find a way out. He was hoping his face wasn't betraying him. Too late. Pin-Mei's face wasn't helping, either. He folded his arms and looked away.

"O-Of course I did," he said in a faux-confident voice. "It's what I'm supposed to do, isn't it? It doesn't mean anything."

"Either way," En chimed in, "there will be an engagement party two nights from now, in order to announce your betrothal."

"WHAT?" the couple cried.

Ren had stood up, obviously displeased. Pin-Mei had remained sitting, but looked very worried.

"Stop springing all these things on us! I mean me!"

"Ren, it's part of the tradition. Your mother and I did it, and Pin-Mei's mother did as well. It's just something that has to be done."

His hand was clenched in a fist. "I'm done. Thanks, Pin-Mei." He left the room.

As the rest of the family left, Pin-Mei followed her father down the hall.

"Father?"

He turned around. "Yes, Pin-Mei?"

She looked at the ground, her left hand clasped over her elbow, her right arm straight.

"Suo…Grandmother isn't coming, is she?"

He smiled and put his hand on her head. "I made sure she was not invited, so have no fear. I want you to enjoy this. It only happens once. Your mother would have wanted it that way."

She smiled. "Okay."

He touched one of her braids. "You look so much like her."

She bowed her head slightly. "So I'm told…"

He straightened. "And even if Suo does, by some chance, show up, I won't allow her to control you or how you dress or how you act. That night will be dedicated to you and Ren and the bond that you two share."

He bent over to whisper in her ear. She smiled.

"Now, go tend to Ren." He patted her again.

"Okay!" She skipped away.

He turned around. "Come, Ren, there's something we need to talk about."

Ren came out of his hiding place around the corner and followed him to Zhang's room.

"What is it?"

"I want to know what this 'trafficking company' was. You're a quick thinker, but your explanations need some work. I know that it is not as harmless as you made it seem." He gave him a hard stare. "And don't lie to me, boy. I'll know."

Ren looked at him, knowing what he had to reveal, and wondering how his future father-in-law would react. He finally sighed and began.

"On one of the days that I took Pin-Mei out into the city, I left her alone for a minute at most to get a drink from a vending machine." His eyes fell to the ground. "When I came back, she was gone. I was finally able to find out where she was. Some syndicate had abducted her and was planning to sell her to gods know who.

He crinkled his brow, remembering what happened next. "I was careless in rescuing her and ended up being captured myself. They threatened to kill me, and told Pin-Mei that they would let me live if she…allowed them to have her body. She agreed, and I got so angry that I ended up freeing myself and killing all of them, aside from the boss, who was supposedly arrested.

"But when I took her to London, she was almost abducted again. The men mentioned someone named Kai, but I don't even have one clue as to who that guy is or what he wants with her."

He bowed his head.

"I'm sorry I let that happen to her. I should have been more careful."

Zhang stared down at him. "And what of this ring?"

"What?"

"That ring my daughter wears and protects when she's cooking, and is distracted by its sparkle, that she seems to cherish more than any other possession. Did you give it to her?"

His wording threw him off. "Yes, I did," he said finally.

"Why? For what purpose?"

Ren took a deep breath. Zhang wanted the truth, and he had to give it to him.

"Because I love her. I would not have given it to her unless I felt that way. I don't do things unless I mean them."

"Well, then, I suppose that is along the lines of what I wanted to hear." He laughed a little and turned his head to the side. "If you had decided that you hated her, there is no chance that I would have let the engagement continue, contrary to what your parents may have told you.

"Hua and I, we were never arranged to be married. She had her own fiance, but we were both determined to be together, no matter what. I was a great deal older than her, eight years, but I was still unable to release her from the chains that the Fan family had encased her in."

Ren stiffened. "Chains?"

Zhang nodded. "They wanted her pregnant as soon as possible, hoping for a boy to continue the family. At Pin-Mei's age, she was already about to give birth to her first and only child. The strain on her body was too much for her. She couldn't handle it, and that's how she died. She made sure that she named her daughter and made me promise to take care of her, so here I am.

"If you do marry my daughter, all I ask is that you allow her to be released from the Fan family's grasp. I don't want her to suffer the same fate as her mother. Suo is a woman who controls those around her. Even I have been made to listen to her at times. She controls my daughter so much that I barely know who she is and what she's really like.

"All I am saying is, if you marry her, protect her and keep her away from Suo, or else you'll end up like me: alone and empty." He turned his back. "You are dismissed."

Ren backed away and finally turned to walk out of the room. He met Pin-Mei outside the door, almost colliding with her. She looked at him skeptically.

"What did my father want from you?"

"Nothing. Just wanted to have a talk."

"I see…"

He started walking down the hall. She followed obediently. They ended up in the backyard, where Ren practiced with his Kwan Dao while she watched at her usual rock. As she watched, she noticed new movements, mainly with his hands.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm developing a new shamanic technique."

"Oh really? What's it like?" She sat on the edge of the rock, looking excited.

He stopped, as if trying to decide how to explain it to her. "Well, many years ago, shamans were known for healing powers and the ability to control the weather. Because of the foolishness of man, these powers were lost to all but the few who can pass the numerous trials to attain them. I believe that if I can channel the spirit of an ancestor into my body, I can attain that power as long as they are with me."

She blinked at him. "How is this different from normal integration?"

"Because…well…"

"It isn't, is it?"

"YES IT IS! I just haven't perfected it yet. I won't even need massive amounts of furyoku to do this. So it's much different."

"So you're saying you don't need Bason anymore?"

"What?"

The spirit appeared next to him, almost in tears. "Bocchama!"

"I didn't say that!"

She giggled. "Well, show me when it's done."

He looked at her, not smiling, then turned away. "Yeah, sure."

_If you knew what I was replacing the furyoku with, you'd never allow me to finish it._

* * *

About an hour later, Ren walked Pin-Mei up to her room. She paused at the door.

"I can't sleep with you?" she asked, her eyes large and innocent-looking

"You could…it's just that we don't want them thinking unnecessary things."

"Oh…I see…"

Silence.

"So I can go with you?"

"Goddammit, Pin-Mei! I said no!"

"No you didn't! You said I could!" They stared each other down.

He groaned and smacked his forehead with his palm.

"Fine, fine, FINE! JUST COME ON!"

She beamed and followed him to his room.

As they got into bed, Ren stared at the ceiling. She lay on her side, facing him, her eyes already heavy. He looked over at her quickly, then back at the ceiling.

"Pin-Mei?"

She opened her eyes a little. "What is it?"

"Do you really hate your grandmother that much?"

She seemed surprised at his question. "Well, it's not that I really hate her. I mean, I can't; she's my mother's mother. I guess I just wish she wouldn't try to make me be someone else."

"Hm?"

"I don't know. Sometimes, I just feel like she's controlling everything I'm doing. Like I'm being molded."

"I see…I'm done now. You can go to sleep."

He kissed her forehead. She smiled and closed her eyes. He didn't right away. Instead, he looked at the ceiling again, taking in her words.

_Molded, huh?_


	21. Sour Milk

Things are going to get weird as Pin-Mei's family starts to get involved. You'll probably scratch your heads and be like "What the ef was that about?", and I don't blame you. Later, it'll make sense. Trust me on this one.

A friend asked me what voice actress I think of when I go over Pin-Mei's dialogue in my head. I joked and said Paku Romi (like her Temari voice), but I seriously think of Yui Makino. She does the voice for Sakura in Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles. It's cute, but not too childish. She really does have a cute voice. Go onto YouTube or something and watch a little bit of the first episode to hear her voice. If you watch about five minutes into the show, you'll even get to hear her say "Niisama"! –squeals-

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-One: Sour Milk**

* * *

"Here."

"What?"

"I want you to have this one."

"But I bought them for you."

"Yeah, but I wanted both so I could give one to you."

"Oh." He looked down at the small porcelain turtledove in her hand, eventually taking it. "Thanks."

She smiled. "You're welcome. This is for until I can buy you a ring. Even then, I want you to have it."

His mouth turned up slightly. "Alright, I promise to take good care of it."

She followed him to his room, where he set the dove on the nightstand. Then they went outside. She sat and watched him with a cooler full of milk bottles beside her.

"Why are you developing this technique again?"

"What's wrong with just wanting to have something else in your arsenal?"

"Nothing I guess…"

He turned around to look at her. "Why aren't you practicing your DaDao techniques? You'll never beat me if you just watch me all the time and don't practice."

She frowned. "Because I don't like it."

He stared at her. "You don't like it? So why do you still practice it?"

"Suo wanted me to. She wants me to inherit my mother's DaDao that she left behind. She says that she never lost a battle with it, so I have to or I'll be dishonoring my mother's memory."

"So what do you _want_ to learn?"

She thought for a moment. "Fans. I like those." She was silent for a moment. "Hey…"

"What?"

"Will you show me how to use your Kwan Dao?"

He looked at her. "Why?"

"Um…what if some bad guy comes and attacks and you're asleep, and your Kwan Dao is the only weapon around? I need to know how to use it in case that happens!"

"That's highly doubtful. Besides, we sleep in the same bed, so you'd just have to wake me up, which is an easy and painless thing to do. Unlike you, I don't slap people in my sleep."

She looked at her feet, obviously embarrassed to be put down by logic. "Yeah…you're right."

Ren looked at his weapon. "I guess I'll show you, but only for a few minutes."

Pin-Mei stood up, her face glowing. "Really? Thank you!"

He didn't reply. He headed to the armory and got a plastic Kwan Dao and handed it to her.

She stared at it blankly. "Why do I get a plastic one?"

"Because you're inexperienced, and my other ones would be too heavy for you."

"No they wouldn't!"

He held his Kwan Dao over her hand. "Fine, use this one." He dropped it into her hands.

She practically fell to the ground. He chuckled as she struggled to stand, the heavy weapon holding her down. She managed to throw it over her shoulder before promptly falling over. Ren looked down at her dizzy face.

"You should listen to me next time."

"Yes sir…" she replied, her eyes spinning.

He helped her up and took the Kwan Dao back, throwing it over his shoulder just to show her how easy it was for him to wield. He picked a different one from the rack and turned back to her.

"This is the one I used when I was about your age. You shouldn't have too much trouble with it." He dropped it into her hands again.

She fell over.

He sighed and gave her the plastic one. "You need to work out more. That's pretty pitiful."

She clutched it. "Shut up. It's not my fault."

"It is if you don't even try."

"Not like I can."

"What?"

"Never mind."

He narrowed his eyes, then assumed a fighting stance. "Alright, just copy me, okay?"

"Okay!"

She did, and they went through a couple forms. Things were going well, but Pin-Mei kept dropping her Dao. After the fifth time, Ren stopped and turned to her.

"You really ARE clumsy," he said. She looked ashamed. "Ah well, some things just can't be changed. Just like how some weapons aren't made for you."

She picked the weapon up and got back into her position. "No! I want to do something right for a change. Even if this isn't the weapon for me, I want to be able to use it somewhat."

He studied her, then smiled. "Alright, Dao Dropper, let's continue."

She nodded and they resumed.

After an hour, she stopped dropping it.

"REN! It's been ten minutes and I haven't dropped it!"

He didn't really think this deserved celebration, but her patted her all the same. "Good job."

She hopped excitedly. "I am SO the man! I mean girl…whatever! I just rock!"

"You should have chosen this from the start if you like it so much."

She stopped bouncing. "Nah. This is your weapon. If I started learning it now, I'd only be copying you. I'll find my own weapon if I'm ever allowed to stop using the DaDao, even if it ends up being a frozen peach that I chuck at people." She giggled.

"Whatever you say."

She got serious again. "But sincerely, thank you. I just like watching you use it. I wanted to see what it was like." She smiled. "Come on, I brought you some milk."

He grinned. "I know I can always count on you for that."

She blushed and led him over to the porch and handed him a bottle. Then she took one for herself.

"Thanks."

"Yup."

As she was about to take a sip, the milk was slapped out of her hand. She watched in horror as it fell and smashed to pieces on the ground, the liquid seeping into the ground.

"Lady Pin-Mei! What do you think you're doing?"

The couple looked up to see Feng panting as if he had just defeated a horribly strong enemy.

"Did you forget or something? You know you can't have milk and things like that!"

Ren looked at him curiously. "Why not?"

"Lady Pin-Mei is lactose intolerant!"

He blinked and looked at her. She had hidden her eyes behind her bangs as she stared at the broken bottle. Feng stood straight and turned to leave.

"You'll have to keep an eye on her, Lord Ren. If she dies because of your precious milk, it'll be on your head." He began walking away. "Honestly, pairing a girl who is lactose intolerant with a boy who drinks milk like water...what on earth was Master Zhang thinking?"

Ren watched him until he was no longer visible, then turned his attention to Pin-Mei. His expression was almost angry.

"Why didn't you say something? No, why would you even _try_ to drink it if it makes you sick? Did you think I'd be mad or something?"

"I'm not lactose intolerant!" she cried clutching the short skirt she was wearing.

"What?" He shook his head to clear his mind of her words. "You don't have to lie about it! I don't care if you are, so don't be a fool and kill yourself over it!"

"I'm not lactose intolerant!" she yelled again. She picked up her head and stared at him in the eye. "I'll prove it to you."

She strolled over to the cooler to take another bottle and quickly opened it, throwing the cap away angrily.

"Hey, wait! Stop it!" he cried and tried to take it from her. She only jerked it away from him, causing some of it to spill. She took a few steps back before chugging it and placing the bottle on the ground. They stood and waited for the milk to take effect.

All of a sudden, Pin-Mei's eyes rolled back and she fell forward. He stepped in to catch her.

"Pin-Mei you idiot!" he cried.

Pin-Mei stood up quickly with a little bounce. "Just kidding." She winked and stuck out her tongue. He stared at her, dumbfounded.

"Are you really okay?"

"Of course."

"But then…why would they insist that you're LIT if you aren't?"

She sat down, her head resting on her right hand. "Just another thing my grandmother wants to control. Just another freedom I don't have."

Ren frowned. "Why does she do things like this?"

She pretended to be busy looking at her fingernails. "I don't know. Maybe because she hates me."

"Why would she hate you?"

Pin-Mei was silent, then stood to go into the house. She stopped in the doorway, but didn't turn around.

"Because I killed her daughter."


	22. Last Night of Peace

I just thought of something: What kind of milk do you think Ren drinks? Like, whole? One percent? Two percent? Skim? I only ask because I'm drinking some right now and it occurred to me. Knowing my memory, (which stinks) it was probably mentioned somewhere and I've forgotten.

Finally, things are going to start happening next chapter. This chapter just serves to tie up the problem from last chapter and bring the story to the next day. If only Naruto/Bleach fillers ended this quickly…

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Two: Last Night of Peace**

* * *

He watched her slide open the door, go in, then shut it again, quickening her pace as she got further away from him. The cooler of milk was still open, so he closed it and carried it inside. With nothing else to do, he decided that he would spend some time in the weight room.

As he went to his room to change, he thought he heard a sad hiccuping sound coming from Pin-Mei's room. He almost kept going, thinking that it wasn't something that he should get involved with, but stopped again and looked at the door.

_Does she want to be alone? She DID leave. Wouldn't she have just cried in front of me if she wanted comfort?_ He took a few more steps toward his room. _I'll go get ready, and if she's still upset, then maybe I'll go in._

He went into his room.

* * *

After changing his clothes (actually just his pants, since he usually exercised shirtless), Ren came out of his room and looked to Pin-Mei's. The sad sound was still there, but he was a little reluctant to go in. With his towel around his neck, he knocked softly on the door, then put his ear to it so he could listen for any reply. There was none.

"Even if you don't answer, I'm coming in, so prepare accordingly."

He waited about three seconds, then opened the door, let himself in, then shut it quietly behind him. He looked around the room, but didn't see Pin-Mei anywhere. Ren sighed, knowing he was going to have to look for her. After looking in her wardrobe, closet, and dumbwaiter, he stood up and folded his arms, mildly annoyed.

_Where the hell could she be? I can hear her well enough, but I can't see her…_

Then he saw something out of the corner of his eye. He looked to her bed and saw a lump under the covers. It quivered every so often in beat to her crying.

Ren pulled the covers up a little and saw her. She was curled up in a ball clutching a pillow, her face buried in it. As she noticed the addition of light and the sudden draft of colder air, she looked up at him slowly. Her eyes were red and swollen, and her hair was a little messed up from her hiding place.

"Ren? What are you…?"

"What are you so upset about?" he asked her in his regular cynical tone. He threw the rest of the covers off of her.

Pin-Mei clutched the pillow tighter. "I'm…I'm scared."

He raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"My grandmother…I don't want her to be at the party…I'm scared…that she'll take you away from me, that I'll never see you again. Even if it makes me sound crazy, I don't think I'll ever be able to be happy if I'm not with you. I would feel better if we just didn't have the stupid party at all."

Ren moved his arms away from his chest, and she took it as a sign that he was okay with her getting close to him. She leaned against him and loosely wrapped her arms around his waist, her head turned to the left, her eyes closed. It was silent as he looked at her wall.

"So you just want to run away from her?"

She opened her eyes. "What?"

"You said you wished we just wouldn't have the party. You'll change your life around so you don't have to see her? You'll give her the satisfaction of knowing you're scared of her?"

She looked up at him. "No…that's not…"

"Even if you don't admit it, I know that's what's going on. You're so scared of her, you'd rather hide than face her head on. You'd rather not celebrate and instead stay in your room, hoping she won't come in. The way this is going, we probably won't even have a wedding, will we? We'll just tell each other we're married, and that's that, right? Something like that is deplorable."

Pin-Mei looked away from him. "No, you don't understand…"

He grabbed her chin and brought it back to him. "Then _make_ me understand." Her eyes looked away from him. "Pin-Mei, look at me."

She did, then her eyes quickly filled up with tears. "I…I don't want to go back there…I don't want to be around her anymore…I don't want to not be able to be myself…I don't want to have to look at that picture of my mom anymore…I don't want to be compared to her anymore…Can I…I just want to stay here…"

Ren gave her his soft-eyed smile. "See? All you need to do is be honest." He kissed her. "If I promised you that nothing would go wrong, would you feel better about the party?"

"Yes…"

"Good. So don't worry. You'll just give yourself a headache if you do." He got up and headed for the door. "I'll see you later. I'm going to go work out."

As he walked down the hall away from her room, he secretly looked over his shoulder to see her quietly following him, her hands folded behind her. He smiled to himself and shook his head.

_So predictable._

He went to his machine, and she sat down on her bench. They didn't speak to each other. The only sound that could be heard was the clanging of the weights. Finally, Pin-Mei looked up at him.

"Hey, Ren?"

He had his back to her.

"What?"

"Are you going to dress up tomorrow?"

"Why?"

"Because have to, and I was wondering if you had to also."

"No. I'm not going to."

"Oh… I see…"

Silence.

"I guess I was just hoping that I wasn't going to be the only one looking funny."

"If you don't want to, then don't."

She looked at her feet. "I think father wants me to, so he can have pictures taken…and because it'll remind him of Mom."

"Your father needs to stop living in the past."

"What?"

"I've seen the way he looks at you. It's not with fatherly pride - it's with painful longing. When he looks at you, he only sees your mother."

She stood up, her fists clenched. "You don't need to point out something so obvious. Almost every time I talk to him, he mentions how much I look like my mother. That's why…" She took her hair out of the braids. "…I like wearing my hair down. Then I don't look like her as much. But…" She braided it again. "I know father misses her, and if it makes him a little happy to see me like that, since he thinks I look like her, then I'll do it."

He watched her as she finished one braid, and was about to start the second when he grabbed her wrist.

"That's not your responsibility. Didn't you just tell me that you were sick of not being able to be yourself? I won't pity you if you bring things like that upon yourself like this. In fact, I'll be the first to laugh at you, just so you'll feel even more foolish." He let go of her. "Don't do anything for anyone else tomorrow. That night is about you…and me," he added after a bit of hesitation. "So don't go being all selfless. It's annoying."

She smiled. "Thanks."

His face softened slightly. "What?"

She smiled more. "I know you're only saying those things because you don't want me to feel like I have to act like my mom to be loved. You're only being brash because you think it'll make it more effective." She giggled. "Thanks."

He kept looking at her, then released her wrist and turned away. "Don't say stupid things." He went into the shower.

"I'm going to go make dinner, okay?" she called to him on her way to the door. He had already turned on the water, obviously trying to ignore her.

"WHATEVER," he yelled back.

She smiled and skipped down to the kitchen.

However, when she got there, she didn't see anyone. She looked all around the floor she was on, but no one was there. Defeated, she sat down in one of the dining room chairs. Then she saw what looked like a slip of paper on the chandelier. She climbed on the table (looking around first to make sure no one was watching) and took it off and read it to herself.

"'Ren and Pin-Mei, we've gone out to get things for the party. We know you can make dinner for yourselves. Signed, your parents.'"

Pin-Mei sighed. "I wish they had told us a little earlier. Would it have killed them to tell us ahead of time?" She looked around. "But I don't think I know where they keep anything. The servants always got everything that I needed. I guess I can just look around…"

* * *

"What the hell happened here?"

"Um…I was trying to find things for dinner…"

"So why are you covered in flour?"

"Because…I was wondering what it would be like to have white hair…?"

He slapped his palm over his face. "Hopeless."

Ren had come into the kitchen expecting the smell of food, but all he had found was Pin-Mei on the floor covered in flour and other semi-edible items around her.

"If you didn't know where anything was, you could have waited until I got out so you could ask me."

Pin-Mei played with her fingers. "But I wanted it to be a surprise."

"Oh I'm surprised all right." He sighed. "Well we better clean this up." He reluctantly reached for a mop. She slapped his hand away.

"No! I made this mess, so **I'm** going to clean it up!" She grabbed the mop and started moving it back and forth across the floor. Ren watched her for a few seconds, then moved toward the stove.

"Fine, I'll make dinner then."

She stopped and jumped in front of the stove. "NO! I'M MAKING DINNER!"

"You were mopping the floor."

"Now I'm making dinner!

"I'll mop the floor, then."

"NO YOU CAN'T!"

"Make up your mind!"

"I wanna do both!"

"If you do, we won't get to eat until midnight!" He sighed again. "Pin-Mei, give me the mop."

She clutched it. "But…but…"

"Give. Me. The. Mop."

She bowed her head and handed it to him. "Yes sir."

"Now go make dinner."

"You're so controlling."

"You wanted to a minute ago."

"Yeah…"

"Fine. Pin-Mei, will you PLEASE go make dinner."

"Of course, darling."

"…Don't you dare call me that again."

* * *

"What on earth were they doing? Honestly, to fall asleep on the table…"

"At least everything's clean. Especially the kitchen."

"Well, I supposed I'll take Pin-Mei up to her room."

Zhang took his daughter into his arms and began carrying her upstairs. After he was no longer in sight, Jun shook her brother awake. He opened his eyes as if he was trying to pass off that he had never been asleep.

"Hey…Where'd Pin-Mei go?"

"Zhang took her to her room," En replied. "Never mind that. There's something you need to do."

Ren was barely listening. He was busy cracking his arms. "What?"

"You need to get a gift for Pin-Mei for tomorrow night."

"Oh, is that al- WHAT?"

"I know we should have told you sooner, but it's part of the festivities."

"Damn right you should have told me sooner! What am I supposed to do at this time of night?"

"You have all day tomorrow before we start dressing you in ceremonial robes."

"HOLD IT. Didn't I tell you to stop springing all this stuff on me? I mean, if Pin-Mei's just finding out about this now, then she won't have time either, so we can just skip it, right?"

En shook his head. "Zhang told me that she already got something for you."

Ren's eyes widened. _Where the hell did she find the time to…_ He shook his head. "Never mind! I'm NOT wearing the robes!"

"You'll be the most underdressed one there, a scene most unimpressive for the guest of honor. Do you want to embarrass Pin-Mei?"

His son glared at him. "FINE FINE FINE! I'LL GET A GIFT AND I'LL WEAR THE BLASTED ROBES! HAPPY?"

His parents smiled. "Yes, quite."

"GOOD." He got up and stormed up to his room to go to bed.

After he had finally laid down, he kept tossing and turning, not able to get comfortable, almost as if something was missing. He finally got up and opened his door and went out into the hall. As he walked, he had his eyes closed in thought, his arms crossing his chest. Suddenly, he bumped into something.

He opened his eyes to see Pin-Mei standing before him, playing with her hands. They stared at each other in silence, each wanting to ask what the other was doing, although both they knew the answer.

Ren scoffed and shook his head, then offered her his hand. She happily took it and followed him back to his room. Once inside, he playfully threw her onto the bed.

"Ow! Hey! I don't like that!" she whined as she held her head.

He laughed at her. "Alright, I'll remember that."

He crawled onto the bed. She cuddled close and clung to him tightly. He put his left arm around her, and she held him tighter. After a while, he almost gagged.

"Hey, you don't need to hold me that close. I'm not going anywhere."

"Yeah…I know…But…"

"Hm?"

"I just feel like tomorrow's going to be different, like we're not going to be laying like this, so I want to make the most of it tonight."

He smirked. "You're so weird sometimes."

He had no idea how right she was.


	23. Confrontation

This was originally going to be two chapters, but I figured I've made you guys wait long enough for some excitement of any sort, so I just meshed them.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Three: Confrontation**

* * *

"Pin-Mei, we need to talk about something…" Ren said as he walked into her room.

He was met with a flying shoe to the face. As it fell, clearing his vision, he saw three girls standing in front of Pin-Mei, who was on a small platform in the center of the room, her back turned and partially bare.

"Don't look, you pig!"

"Even if she IS awfully cute!"

"Um…she's indecent…"

He stared at them. "Who the hell are you?"

"Rong!" a tall girl with short dark red hair said.

"Ling!" piped one with turquoise buns.

"Shu…" whispered the shortest, who had chin length silver hair in a headband and glasses.

"We're lady Pin-Mei's maid servants!" they said in unison.

Ren looked at them with a weirded out face. "Riiight…" He took another step towards his fiancée. "Now, Pin-Mei-"

"Don't be a perv!" the three girls cried creating a wall around her. Pin-Mei giggled.

"It's okay, everyone," she said turning around, her robes covering her. "What is it, Ren?"

He stepped toward her again. "What the hell is this?" He held up his Kwan Dao. Club Photo stickers were plastered all over the pole near the blade.

Pin-Mei looked worried, then quickly turned back around. "You can show him out now."

"HEY!"

She turned around again, still scared.

"I just wanted to make sure you had some too…and that you're thinking about me…"

He sighed. "Of course I'm thinking about you. Why wouldn't I?"

She bowed her head. "I don't know…"

He brushed her hair from her face. "Just don't put any more on, okay?"

"Okay…"

Rong unfolded her arms. "Okay now that that's done…GET OUT!" She punted him out the door. He landed on his face in the hall

"Jeez…you'd think I was some random pervert, not the guest of honor…" he grumbled as he stood up and dusted himself off.

"I'll come get you when I'm ready!" Pin-Mei called.

"Don't come back until then!"

"We're almost done!"

"So…um…please wait outside…"

Ren watched the door slam before turning to go back downstairs where guests were beginning to arrive. As he looked to the entrance hall, he squinted his eyes.

There was a tall woman in her mid-forties wearing a long black dress and robes standing and talking to his parents. They didn't seem very pleased. Zhang showed up, looking very angry and proceeded to yell at the woman. He looked about ready to strike her, but En held him back. In the end, Zhang relented and left. The woman smiled behind a fan, then looked up at Ren on the balcony. Her eyes were cold and full of malice, and they seemed as though they were trying to piece his heart. His parents spoke to her and seemed to lead her into the large dining hall were the party was being held.

_Who the hell…?_

He heard the door behind him open. He turned around to see Pin-Mei standing in the doorway, dressed in a traditional Chinese dress and robes. The dress was dark purple, and the silk from under the sleeves was white. A pattern of butterflies graced it, as always. Her hair had been braided and put into two loops close to her ears. As he looked her over, he could see the clips he had given her nestled at the base.

"You look nice."

She hid her face behind a paddle-shaped fan. "Thank you…" She looked at him. "You don't have your tongari up?"

He looked irritated. "No. I was told to look a little more mature, and apparently that isn't a mature hair style." He sighed and closed his eyes. Then he felt a hand next to his cheek. Opening his eyes, he noticed that Pin-Mei was touching the fallen hair.

She smiled. "It's so soft. I like it."

Ren turned his head in an effort to get his hair out of her reach. "You can stop touching it now."

"Fine." She pouted, but then smiled again. "Do you like mine?"

He looked at her hair again. What did he know about hair? "Yes, but," he said, touching one of the loops. "Didn't you want to wear it down?"

She hid herself even more. "Yes…"

"Then why aren't you?"

"Lady Pin-Mei, you should have told us you wanted it down!"

"You'll look even cuter!"

"Um…I know a good style…"

He turned her around and gently pushed her back into the room. "Go on."

They came back out ten minutes later. Pin-Mei's hair was down and a small tail of hair was on either side of her head, kept in place by Ren's clips.

"She insisted that the clips stay in."

"She's so cute when she blushes!"

"Um…she must really like them…"

Ren smiled at her. She was still covering herself with her fan. He took it from her and handed it to Ling. "You don't need this." Then he took her hand. "Let's go, everyone's waiting." He started leading her down the stairs, his black robe with gold dragons flowing behind him. She nodded as if she had a say in the matter and allowed him to take her down to the dining hall. Her maidservants watched them leave.

"He's all right, I guess."

"I'm so jealous that he gets her!"

"Um…they seem to love each other…"

The other two turned to her. "Well, DUH!"

* * *

As they entered the room, Pin-Mei squeezed his hand. Ren turned to her.

"What?"

"I don't like crowds."

"Just stay close."

She nodded. As they were about to continue, a middle-aged man and woman stopped them.

"Oh Ren!" the woman exclaimed, "how nice to see you!"

"Yeah…Hi…" He had _no_ idea who these people were, and he wasn't really interested in finding out.

The man leaned over to look at Pin-Mei. "This must be the lucky lady," he said.

His wife chuckled. "She looks just like a little doll!"

"Oh, yes! She looks so young! Not a day over thirteen!"

"How absurd! Eleven or twelve at most!"

Ren looked over at Pin-Mei, who looked down at her chest then at the floor. Her eye twitched. It was obvious that she didn't like being thought of as so young. To her, it was insulting. He turned to the people in front of him.

"She's almost fifteen," he said, silencing the couple. They instantly looked embarrassed.

"Oh, I see it now! Of course!"

"I just didn't get a good look at her face! Oh yes! Look at how grown up it is!"

Ren gave them a fake smile. "Excuse us." He lead Pin-Mei away and further into the crowd. She looked up at him, seemingly surprised at the way he had spoken up for her.

"Ren..."

"My parents said to meet up with them when we were ready."

She nodded. They passed the last two people in their way, and there were his parents.

Pin-Mei stopped dead in her tracks.

Ren looked back at her, annoyed. "Pin-Mei, you know how much I hate it when you do this. Can't you just-." Then he noticed her face.

She stood there, shaking, pale-faced. Her eyes were wider than he had ever seen them. They were filled with horror and fear. It almost scared him to see her like this. He swallowed.

"Pin-Mei…what's wrong?"

She moved her mouth, but nothing came out. A quivering hand rose and she pointed straight ahead of them. He looked, then understood why she was so shaken up, so scared. No, terrified. She tried to hide behind him, letting him feel every small tremor of fear her body gave out.

Talking with his parents was the woman dressed in black who had given him such cold eyes.

Fan Suo.

"Sh-sh-she's h-here…Father said she wouldn't be here…why is she here?...This can't be happening…"

He put his hand on her right shoulder and pulled her close to him.

"Try not to be afraid. I'm here. If she tries anything…" He pulled her closer to whisper in her ear. "I'll poison her food." As he had hoped, he won a small smile from her. "Just stay close to me. I'll make sure nothing happens to you." He squeezed her hand and kissed her. "Let's go. Don't let her know you're afraid. It's what she wants."

They started again toward the three adults. His parents smiled as they came over. He ignored Suo as he planted his feet firmly on the ground to show he wouldn't be moved. She was looking at him with that icy stare again.

Ran turned to her son. "This is Suo, Pin-Mei's grandmother," she said cheerfully. He somehow felt that this cheerfulness of hers was fake.

"Ran, we should go tend to the other guests," En suggested. She agreed and they left the old woman and the young couple alone.

Ren was finally able to get a good look at her. Her face was covered in a pale cream that masked any wrinkles, making her look about ten years younger than she really was. Her hair was a dark gray, only a tone brighter than black, and clipped behind her head, allowing to to trail a little past her bust. A small crystal bird was on the clip. Her devious lips were painted red, and she carried a fan that, unlike his mother's, opened and closed. Ren didn't know if he was imagining it, but her aura seemed to reek of blood and death.

Suo put on a fake smile. "Well, you're certainly a handsome young man."

Ren reciprocated the action. "Why thank you."

She looked to her granddaughter. "Come here, Pin-Mei. Can't you even say hello when you haven't seen me for more than two weeks?"

Pin-Mei tried to stand tall as she walked over to stand in front of her. Suo grabbed her chin and turned her head from side to side, like the Don had done back in Japan. She frowned.

"Why is your hair down?" she asked.

"Because I like it down," Ren said. Suo glared at him, then returned to her granddaughter.

She rubbed a few fingers across Pin-Mei's cheeks. "You haven't been using your mother's cream, have you?" She looked at her eyes. "And where are your contacts?"

Pin-Mei looked away from her. "…No…I haven't been using it…"

"Ignorant girl," she growled. "And the contacts?"

"I…um…ran out…"

"Lies! All LIES!" Suo cried forcefully releasing her. "And now Feng tells me that you were drinking milk again! Can't you do one thing I tell you to? He also says you haven't gotten any better at the DaDao." She looked at her dress.

"Purple…" she said in disgust. "Where is the navy blue dress your mother wore?"

"Back at home," Pin-Mei said.

"Why?"

"I don't like navy blue. I like purple."

"Why you-!"

SLAP

Ren stared at what he had just missed. Pin-Mei's head was turned to the right, her cheek burning.

He had let her get slapped. In front of him. After he had told her he wouldn't let anything happen to her.

Suo scoffed at her. "Now look at what you made me do! Your face is worse off than before! If you had half the beauty your mother had, then maybe we wouldn't be in this mess!"

She raised her hand to slap her again. Pin-Mei braced herself, but never felt it. She looked up to see Ren standing in front of her, her grandmother's wrist in his hand. He glared at her with eyes that could be mistaken for daggers. When he spoke, his voice was low, sharp, and cold.

"Don't you dare lay a finger on my fiancée."

"What?"

"You heard me. And I've heard enough of you. Don't come near her again."

"You wretched Tao child!"

Ren smirked. "What of my name? It gives me pride. But Fan? All that means is cage, or fence, and that's what I think is going on here. You're caging Pin-Mei as if she were a bird, not letting her do what she wants. You even lay your hands on her. Well…"

He reached his free hand back to hold hers.

"…When she becomes part of my family, she'll be under my jurisdiction and in my care. Until then, I don't want you getting anywhere near her. If you even try to slap her one more time, I'll have the guards kill you on sight."

He gave her his coldest stare.

"Pin-Mei is my fiancée- hurt her, and I'll kill you."


	24. The Real Ren

Here and now. The chocolate chips are hitting the fan. And no, I don't mean Suo. I mean "A lot of crap is about to go down."

My song of choice for this chapter, as well as for the rest of this arc, is "GAME" by Ayumi Hamasaki, both the original and the classical mix. I'm surprised I'm not sick of these songs I play them so much…

**Notes: Suo mentions Pin-Mei "dressing in red" for Ren. Many traditional Chinese weddings have the bride wear a red dress, symbolizing/hoping for luck in marriage.**

"**Zhouyu" basically means "curse".**

**This is the last fluffy chapter for a while**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Four: The Real Ren**

* * *

Suo glared at him, then used her free hand to slap him in the same manner she had with Pin-Mei.

"How dare you threaten me!" she yelled. "Pin-Mei isn't even supposed to be engaged to you in the first place! I'll make sure she never dresses in red for you—NEVER."

Ren scoffed at her. "Well, that's a shame. I had already given her some of my old clothes to wear, which includes a red shirt. So you see, I've already seen her wear red."

She back handed his other cheek. "Don't talk back to me!" Suddenly, her hand was restrained. She looked down to see that Pin-Mei had wrapped herself around it.

"Grandmother, please stop!" she cried, tears cascading down her cheeks. "Please don't hurt him anymore! Please!"

Ren looked over at her, concerned. "Pin-Mei…"

Suo violently shook her off. She fell into a pillar and onto the floor. Ren tried to go help her, but Suo folded her fan and hit him to the ground. Pin-Mei looked at him, more fearful than ever. Her grandmother stood over her.

"This is all your fault, you know," she said in a dark voice. "If you hadn't attached yourself to him, he wouldn't be on the floor right now. Oh yes, you cause so much trouble for the Tao family. They go through the effort of organizing such a grand party for you two children, and you waste your time disobeying me.

"He never wanted you to begin with, did he? He hated you when you came here the first time, and I don't see how that would have changed in the course of a couple weeks."

"You're-You're wrong!" Pin-Mei cried, trying to keep herself together. "He does love me! He does! I know he does! He…He came and saved me when I was kidnapped! He took care of me when I was sick! He bought me things when he knew he didn't have to! He told me he was sad when I wasn't there! He…He kissed me on his own accord, because he wanted to! He proposed when he knew it wasn't necessary! He DOES love me!"

Suo chuckled. "Do you know what the word 'jurisdiction' means?"

She tensed. "No…"

"It means 'control'. Did he not say 'She will be under my jurisdiction'? I believe he really meant 'She will be under my control'."

Pin-Mei's eyes widened.

"You see now, don't you? He doesn't love you. He just wants something to control, and you happen to be here and in his grasp. I came here to save you, my dear child. If you don't come home with me now, you'll end up like those women your father used to spend all of his time with…"

Pin-Mei couldn't think straight. She couldn't even decide if what the evil woman in front of her had said was true or not. Ren supported himself on his arms and looked at her, only one eye open. She just stared back at him, tears still rolling down her cheeks. She suddenly got up and ran away.

"Pin-Mei…" He pushed himself up so he could finally stand, then moved to go after her.

"It doesn't matter if you catch her," Suo said, stopping him in his tracks. "In the end, she's coming home with me."

He glared at her. "Even if you steal her and take her to the other side of China, I'll get her back." He ran through the crowd and down the hall.

The sound of her running echoed throughout, and he was able to follow her using that as a compass. They led him to the porch, where the sounds stopped. As he left the house, he dropped his robes at the door, then headed wherever the bushes were rustling. The leaves attacked his face, chest, and limbs as he rushed through them. He came to the beach, the one where he had taught her how to swim.

There she was, standing at the edge, throwing rocks into the water. He slowly went to stand beside her. She glanced at him out of surprise, but then went right back to her throwing.

"Hey," he said quietly.

"Hey." Her voice was already quivering.

"Can I have one?" He motioned to the rocks she held in her hand.

"Sure." She handed him a flat one.

He threw it, and they watched it skip across the water before finally sinking. She sighed.

"You're good at everything."

"No, I'm not."

"Well, I think so."

Silence.

"Do you believe what she told you?"

"No…not really…It's hard. The way she says things, it's almost impossible to deny her…" She trailed off. She didn't make a sound, but he knew she was crying. He watched her cross to stand in front of him.

"Ren…do you love me?"

A pang of hurt appeared in his eyes. He hugged her close to him.

"Please don't ever say that to me again." He put his forehead on hers. "Please don't ever say that again…" he whispered.

She pulled away from him so she could look at his face. What she saw could have killed her.

The look of hurt was still there. And a single tear was rolling down his cheek. She felt herself lose her composure just by looking at him.

"I almost never cry," he said as he touched the tear and looked at the moisture on his finger. "But you've made me do it twice, both over my feelings for you. Don't you think that means something?"

She lost it. "I'm sorry, Ren…I'm so sorry…" She clutched him and cried into his chest. He held her again, tighter than ever.

"It's okay…I forgive you."

"It's just…the things she said…Suo seemed so intent on taking me home…I'm so scared that it's going to happen somehow…"

He released her and looked into her eyes. "Even if she does, I'll get you back."

Her eyes quivered. "Ren…"

He gently wiped some of her tears away, then stroked her hair. "No matter how far away she takes you, no matter where she hides you, no matter how many times she tries to tear us apart, I'll always come find you. I'll willingly take anything she throws at us. No matter what, you'll always come back to me. I'll make sure that happens. That's something I can promise."

"Ren…"

He silenced her by covering her lips with his. She closed her eyes as she returned it, remembering the first time they had done this. It was so clear to her then how foolish it had been to doubt him. Though he was cynical and sometimes cold to her, on the inside, there was nothing but love. He'd shown that again and again. She was hoping that someday, she'd be able to do the same thing for him.

They broke apart. "I love you," she whispered. "I love you so much…"

"I know…I love you too," he whispered back.

"I know…I know you do…" She smiled though her eyes were still wet.

After staring at her, then smiling, he captured her with another passionate kiss. She couldn't help but giggle as he trailed the kisses down her neck.

"You really like my neck, don't you?"

He stopped long enough to whisper in her ear. "No, I like every part of you."

"You always have to say things like that, don't you?"

"Only because I mean them." He continued kissing her neck, eventually moving down to stop at her collarbone, as always. He pulled away. "I'm going to go have Suo thrown out. I won't have her torment you anymore."

"Ren…"

He cupped her cheek and gave her one last kiss, allowing his tongue to slip into her mouth. When he was done, he still kept his face close to hers. "I'll be just a minute. Go wait for me in the hallway to our rooms."

She nodded, and he smiled. They walked to the porch, where they parted ways. He kissed her hand.

"I love you- never forget that."

She smiled. "I won't." She watched him run down the hall.

She suddenly felt a sinking feeling in her heart. It felt as if there was a large void. As if that was the last time she would share a moment like that with him. She tried to ignore it as she made her way upstairs.

* * *

Ren felt an adrenaline as he ran down the darkened hallways. He was going to put an end to this torture that Pin-Mei had to suffer at the hands of her grandmother. He was going to do it tonight.

A tall figure standing in the middle of the hall came into view. He was a tall man with green eyes and dark crimson hair. The figure donned a simple black dress suit with a blue rose in the front pocket. He had a malicious look about him, but he held no visible weapon. Ren stopped in front of him.

"Who are you?"

The man smiled. "My name is Xu Kai. I am known as Xu Pin-Mei's elder brother."

Ren's eyes widened. Kai…Master Kai…was this the person that was so intent on abducting Pin-Mei and returning her to China? He struck a fighting stance.

"Sorry, but I don't remember you being on the guest list. I think you should leave before I get really pissed."

"Oh, boy, why are you getting so angry?" Kai reasoned, holding out his arms. "I have merely come to offer you and my sister my blessing."

Ren just glared at him. "Somehow, I doubt this."

"Well…there is one problem."

"What would that be?"

"You want something from my sister, but she isn't willing to give it to you."

He looked at Kai quizzically. "What are you talking about?"

Kai sighed. "Come now, you know what I'm talking about. You're an intelligent youth. I don't think I need to spell it out for you. You've done so much for her, which I am eternally grateful for, but it seems that she is not. She hasn't given you a thing in return."

"I don't need that from her! And she _has_ done things for me. From the inside. That's enough for me."

He raised an eyebrow. "Is it now? Why do I get the feeling that when you were with my dear sister on the beach that you wanted to place her down on the sand and have your reward?"

Ren tried his best to keep his anger inside of him. "How DARE you call that a reward! I would never think of taking that from her. Never. She's worth waiting for. I love her, and I would never hurt her like that!"

"You may deny it, but the fact of the matter is that you are still a teenaged boy, and you all have the same thoughts." He chuckled. "Don't worry, I'll let you go have your reward **right now**."

"Wha-!"

Before he could do anything, Kai was in front of him. In one quick movement, he placed a talisman against Ren's forehead, his index and middle finger holding it in place.

"ZHOUYU!"

* * *

Pin-Mei leaned against the wall, trying her best not to fidget. It had only been five minutes, but she was worried. It had never occurred to her how exactly he would make Suo leave. Would it really be as simple as telling the guards he didn't want her there? As she contemplated this, the sound of footsteps reached her ears. She looked and saw Ren walking down the hall towards her. She smiled as he came closer and stood away from the wall.

"Oh good, you're back, I was getting worried."

Her smiled faded a little bit when he passed by her without a kind smile or embrace. He was heading for the door to his second room.

"We're going to wait in my room until she leaves. Come on." He said. His voice was low and monotone. She looked a little hurt, but did as she was told. He came in behind her, quietly locking the door behind him.

Pin-Mei looked around. It had been ten years since she had last been in his room.

"Don't touch anything," he snapped at her.

She retracted her arms and kept them close to her body. "Um…Ren?"

"What?" Again, snapping.

"Did something happen? You seem-,"

"Seem what? Huh? Pissed? Is that what you were going to say? Whose fault do you think that is? Maybe if you didn't cry and whine so much I wouldn't be so pissed off all the time. Just do everyone a favor and shut up. Isn't that what a good wife is supposed to do?"

Pin-Mei couldn't believe what she was hearing. He hadn't even said things like this when she first came here…what was going on…?

"_I love you, never forget that"_

He had just said that a little while ago…so why…

Ren deliberately walked in front of her and, with his back to her, took off his shirt. Her heart stopped.

Where his emblem used to be was a large curse brand with a bird in the center surrounded by incantations in the shape of a cage; her family's notorious symbol.

She shook her head several times, covering her face and backing up. Her foot hit something. She looked down to see her DaDao on the floor. Her eyes trailed from her weapon to the center of the curse brand. She slowly picked it up, and pointed it at his back, tears streaming down her face. Her hand shook. She started to move closer to him, and raised the blade. As she was about to bring it down, she stopped and threw it across the room. She couldn't do it.

Ren turned to her. "You'll regret not killing me."

"I could never regret that," she said quietly. "Because I love you, and I would never want to hurt you."

"Oh, how very nice of you," he said in a mocking tone.

He rushed at her and grabbed her by the neck and slammed her against the wall. She coughed up some blood, gagging. It was then that she realized how faded his eyes were. No light in them at all. She knew that her Ren wasn't there, but still she had to try.

"Everything you think you know about me is a lie," he said, a smirk on his face. "I don't love you; never have, never will. You've been deluding yourself this whole time. It'd be best if you just went back home now before I have to get 'physical' with you."

As he spoke, Pin-Mei saw the porcelain turtledove on his nightstand. She reached for it and finally grabbed it, then showed it to him.

"Ren, don't you remember this?" she asked earnestly. "I gave this to you yesterday. You bought them for me. For us. They symbolize a strong bond between two people. That's why I gave one to you…"

Ren stared at the small dove, then slowly took it out of her hand, still studying it. "Turtledoves…A strong bond…"

Pin-Mei smiled. "That's right. It's because you and I-,"

CRACK

Her eyes were wide again. Ren had closed his fist around the bird and shattered it. He opened his hand to allow her to watch the shattered porcelain fall to the ground.

"As if I'd get all mushy over a buzzard. Idiot."

"_I promise to take good care of it."_

"No…"

He scowled at her. "I've had enough of you. Let's just get down to business so I can get you out of here as quickly as possible."

He grabbed her and forcefully threw onto the bed. She landed on her back, allowing him to jump on top of her.

"You want a kiss, sweetheart?" he teased. "Alright, I'll give you that…and so much more."

He forced his lips onto hers and savagely cupped her chest. She tried to scream, but he wouldn't her.

"Just keep quiet. It'll be over before you know it…and don't worry about getting pregnant; you'll be dead before you can even think about that."

"HELP SOMEBODY!" she screamed at the top of her lungs while his mouth was away from hers.

He slapped her. "I said SHUT UP."

"_Don't worry. I'll never let anyone take that from you until you're ready to give it yourself."_

She knew there was nothing she could do to stop this. No matter how much it was going to hurt, she would do what she had to…even if it killed her.

"I forgive you," she whispered. "And I still love you…I know this isn't what you wanted."

He was busy taking apart her robes and didn't hear her. He smirked. "Ready?"

As he stared down at her menacingly, a drop of water fell onto her cheek, causing her to quickly close her right eye to shield it. She opened it again, only to have another drop fall on her. Then another. And another. Pin-Mei stared at him.

"You're crying."

"What? Like hell I am! This is my reward and I'm finally taking it! I'm finally getting what I rightfully deserve! And soon, all that 'pleasure' I gave you I'll be receiving back tenfold!"

_But the real you is crying…_

She reached a hand up to gently touch his cheek and brush away a few tears. "I forgive you," she said again.

He looked phased, but then grabbed her wrist and threw it down. "I'm getting this over with, whether you're ready or not!"

Another tear fell on her face. _Ren…_

The door suddenly blasted open. In the doorway was Pyron, with Jun behind him. She stepped forward and looked at the scene in front of her.

"Ren…Why…I never thought you would…"

Ren just stared at her. A few more tears falling.

Pin-Mei covered her face and wailed.

She knew it was all over.


	25. Bie Liao

I'll be perfectly honest with you; I didn't like writing this chapter. I'm a HUGE sap. When something really bad happens or is going to happen to a character I like, I usually stop watching the show for a few days until I can stomach it. Yeah, I know. I need serious help. –shrug-

It took me a while to actually decide how they were going to be torn apart. At first, the engagement was going to be broken for no reason. Then I decided he was going to push her off a cliff into the ocean. Then I thought maybe a girl hired by Suo would come in and steal Ren away and control him, and Pin-Mei would overhear them in the bedroom. None of them really seemed all that plausible.

I don't know if any of you have ever had something completely earth-shattering happen to you and gotten the feeling like you couldn't breathe, and you had no idea what to do next, so you just lay on your floor, bawling your eyes out until someone finally comes to your rescue. Well, I tried to recreate that in this chapter, so I apologize if you have no idea what I'm talking about.

I'm also listening to Faye Wong's "Red Bean" one of few Chinese songs I know xD The lyrics actually fit pretty nicely. She mentions watching snow together, which is actually a big part of the story.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present the ZOMGANGST! chapter.

**Notes: Just to be clear, Ren did not actually get around to taking advantage of Pin-Mei. He was about to, but that's when Jun showed up.**

**A "kowtow" is an extremely formal bow the Chinese mainly used in front of emperors where your forehead touches the ground. It's basically like "Can I lick your shoes while I'm down here?" It can also be a verb meaning to relent or concede. Google is your friend.**

**Just to warn you, Pin-Mei basically cries for this whole chapter. If you find her annoying, then this is not the chapter for you. Oops.**

**********Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Five: Bie Liao (We'll Never Meet Again)**

* * *

Pin-Mei locked herself in her room and hid under the covers, still wailing. The feeling inside her was hollow and she felt as if she were suffocating. Her head felt light, she felt confused. She had no idea what to do with herself. She rolled around, screaming, and eventually fell onto the floor, wrapped in a cocoon of blankets.

Ma Ying appeared near her. "My Lady…"

Pin-Mei didn't answer. The spirit tried her best to comfort her.

"My Lady, I am sorry about what he did to you…I never thought he would use you like that…But maybe it is best that you found out who he is now rather than after marriage…"

"Leave," Pin-Mei whispered.

Ma Ying was taken aback. "What?"

"Leave...You don't know what just happened…You have absolutely…no…idea…" Her wailing started up again as she remembered.

"Very well, mistress…I apologize if I upset you." She vanished.

Pin-Mei curled up in a ball, the nightmarish memories of what happened when Jun found them flooding back.

* * *

_As Pin-Mei cried, and Jun stared at them, bewildered, their parents, along with Suo rushed into the room. All they saw was Ren on top of a crying girl, and that was all the evidence they needed. _

_Guards rushed in and pulled him off of her, restraining him. It was only then that she realized that others had appeared. She sat up clutching her robes closed, and ran over to them._

_The couple stared at each other. His yellow eyes glared at her, as if to tell her this was all her fault. She stared back at him with remorseful eyes. They had only come because she had screamed for help. Now, she felt like it had been the wrong thing to do, that she should have just let it happen so that things wouldn't have had to get to this point. To her, it really was her fault._

_She timidly reached out to touch his face. He froze, and she swore she could see the light in his eyes returning. He blinked a couple times, then looked at her. All he could see was her holding robe closed and her shattered face, decorated with red marks on her cheeks. He squinted at her, then opened his eyes wide. _

"_Pin-Mei? What-"_

_A guard delivered a swift and hard blow to the back of his neck, and his body went limp. Pin-Mei gasped as they dragged him out of the room. She ran over to En._

"_What are you going to do with him?" she cried, her voice frantic._

"_We are bringing him downstairs. He'll spend some time down there so he can think about this."_

"_Downstairs…" she whispered, then realized where En planned to take him. "No! You can't!" She quickly tied her sash and ran over to stand in front of Ren. "You've already knocked him out…isn't that enough?"_

_He looked at her quizzically. "How can you be so forgiving of someone who tried to violate you?"_

_She tried to smile. "He's done too many good things for me. I can't forget them because of one thing he's done wrong." _

_He studied her. "Very well." He turned to the guards. "Lock him in his room."_

_Suo rushed over to her and cupped her face. "Oh my precious little darling! Are you alright? That must have been so scary for you! Don't worry, I'll make sure it never happens again…"_

* * *

After a few hours of crying, Pin-Mei got up and started packing. She knew what was coming. It was inevitable. This was what Suo was after all along. This was how she had planned to tear them apart: force Ren to rape her and get caught doing it. Then get hysterical and demand that the engagement be broken. She'd go back home. Be arranged to marry someone else. She would never see Tao Ren again.

The thought made her sick to her stomach. She opened a window. Cold air from the early rainy morning rushed in.

She looked over at her nightstand where her rose ring and the butterfly clips sat. Then she glanced down at the engagement ring on her left hand. She closed her eyes painfully at what had to come next.

It was time to give them all back.

She gathered herself and slipped out of her room and into his.

He was sleeping soundly in his bed, and she smiled weakly to see him at peace. He was on his back, face to the ceiling, and a hand outstretched and palm-up. His tongari had rebelled against being straightened and was now back in its place.

Out of the few times she had seen him asleep, she never studied him as much as she did then. She wanted to remember what he looked like for as long as she possibly could. She wanted to remember everything. It could be the very last time she would see him like this. See him at all.

As the memories flooded back to her, her eyes burned again, but she hurriedly rubbed them to nip it in the bud. She knew it was time to do what she had come here to do.

Pin-Mei cautiously approached his bed, her eyes on his open hand. Gently, she placed the hair clips and rose ring in it, along with a folded piece of paper. She took a deep breath. One thing left.

She bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut as her right hand slowly moved to remove the ring on her left. No matter how hard she tried to keep it in, the tears came as it finally left her finger. She looked at it, tried to smile, then placed it in his hand and gently closed it, holding it with both of hers. She knelt down for a moment.

"Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you so much. I've had the time of my life these past two weeks." She looked down, almost laughing at herself. "When I first came here, I thought that you were still going to hate me this whole time...but you loved me instead...and I thank you for that. Ren…you made me happy."

She wanted to squeeze his hand, but also didn't want him to wake up. Instead, she stood up and brushed back his bangs. She found herself wishing that she could see his eyes one last time, but that was impossible. After a moment of looking him over, she bent over to kiss him for what she thought of as the very last time. A few of her tears fell on his cheek as she turned to leave, but she was too distracted to notice.

She made her way to the door, putting her hand on the knob. Before leaving, she looked back at him one last time.

"Goodbye, Ren…I love you."

He stirred slightly.

* * *

"How could you allow this to happen, Zhang?" Suo yelled at her son-in-law. "Your daughter - my precious granddaughter – was almost raped by that…that beast! Now she's traumatized, up in her room, bawling. At this rate, she'll die of dehydration before we get home!"

"Silence, Suo!" Zhang yelled back. "You weren't even invited in the first place! Everything was fine until you showed up!"

"Please, both of you, calm down," En said, getting between them. "I am aware that something horrible has occurred, now is not the time to be fighting amongst ourselves. It is at times like these that we must be mature adults." He turned to Suo. "As you have requested, the engagement will be broken, and Ren will spend a month in the Ryuyou no Ma."

"No! Please don't!"

They turned to see Pin-Mei standing next to one of the pillars, her hands clutching to it as if to help her stand. Her eyes were swollen with dark circles under them, and she was still shaking. Nevertheless, she left her support and walked over to them slowly. Suo ran over to her.

"Pin-Mei, darling! Are you alright? Are you sure you should be walking around, after what _that boy_ did to you?"

Pin-Mei glared at her. "Get away from me," she said coldly. "I know that you're the one who did this. All of it. I won't forgive you for hurting Ren with that curse brand." She walked past her. Suo kept staring at where she had been, shocked by her unusually dark voice. Pin-Mei approached En, still taking deep breathes from crying.

"I beg of you…please don't torture him. He never actually did anything to me, and he knew it was wrong. He was…crying…"

"Crocodile tears," Suo muttered. Pin-Mei shook her head.

"No, they weren't. I've seen him cry before, and I can say with full confidence that those tears that I felt were real. I'd stake my life on it. He didn't want to do it. It was almost as if he were…" she glared at Suo, "…possessed…" She looked En in the eye. "I will not tolerate anyone hurting him for something that didn't happen…I may be out of line by saying so, but I won't just act like this has nothing to do with me the moment I leave this house. If I must leave…"

She dropped to the floor in front of him in a kowtow position.

"…then please grant my one wish: don't punish Ren." She bowed so low that her head touched the floor. Her whole body quivered as she began sobbing again. "Please," she kept whispering.

As he looked down at her, he knew he had no choice. "Very well, Pin-Mei. I will concede to your wish. Ren will receive no punishment for his actions of last night. You have my word."

She looked up. "Thank you so much." As she stood, Zhang walked over to place his hand on her head.

"It is time for us to leave," he said. His daughter nodded and followed Suo out of the mansion. He turned to En.

"Again, Zhang, I apologize for my son's actions, it was-,"

"Pin-Mei was correct. Ren did not debauch her of his own free will. Fan Kai put a curse on him. We've all fallen into Suo's trap."

En looked away, thinking about his words. Zhang continued.

"If you want proof, go look at your son's back. Now that the curse has been lifted, there is a large scar where the curse seal was burned into him and held him captive. Do not worry; the scar will fade within a day or two." He turned to leave. "I'll be sending Pin-Mei back to you soon enough, whether you choose to reinstate their engagement or not. I will not deny my daughter the happiness she found in your son. If she is anything like her mother, she will come back to you even before that, and demand to marry him anyway. But then, you know all about that."

He began walking away.

"Farewell, En."

* * *

Out in the courtyard, Pin-Mei sat in the horse-drawn carriage, waiting for her father to appear. She turned to him as he got in.

"Do you want it?" he asked her. He removed a small liquid-filled vile from inside his robe.

She stared at his knee, too tired to think about anything. By this time, she had been awake for close to twenty-two hours. After a time, she finally nodded, making an affirmative moaning sound.

"Very well. Come here, my daughter."

He opened the vial and took some of it into his mouth. She leaned as much as she could towards him, barely able to support herself on her hands. He put his hand on her shoulder and gave her what seemed to be a passionate kiss. When they pulled apart, Pin-Mei's eyes were bright and open, and she looked extremely alert. He smiled at her.

"I see it worked."

She gave a subtle nod. The carriage began to move, and she turned to the window and stared out of it.

"Pay close attention and remember all that you see," he told her as they passed through the gates and away from the House of Tao.

She nodded as she took one last look back at the house where her everything slept.

From the reflection in the window, Zhang could see a flood of silent tears falling down his daughter's face.

_Don't worry, Pin-Mei. You'll be back. I'll make sure of it._


	26. Sweet Dreams My Love

I recently infected a friend with the Shaman King virus. She fell in love with Ren. My job is done.

I kinda imagined a closing theme-type animation using "Omokage" with Ren and Pin-Mei and Hua, in contrast to Anna and Yoh and Hao. Of course, he was doing more masculine things than playing with a piece of cloth. I have such an odd mind. Whatever, it helps me think.

**Notes: Some may find this chapter quite disturbing. It's violent and pretty graphic. You've been warned.**

**It's a dream by the way.**

**************Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story**** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Six: Sweet Dreams My Love**

* * *

Ren opened his eyes and looked around. Darkness was all that was around him. The void was so big that he couldn't see a single thing. He tried to call out only to find that his voice had left him. He grabbed his throat, his eyes full of alarm.

_What's going on?_

"Niisama!" a tiny voice called.

Ren turned to see a four-year-old Pin-Mei running to him, smiling and giggling. He knelt down as she approached him.

"Niisama!" she cried again as she jumped to wrap her hands around his neck.

Ren gently wrapped his arms around her, and as he looked over her shoulder, he saw something he recognized. She was wearing the butterfly pins. He pushed her away slightly so he could look at her. She was still smiling.

"Niisama got really big! Before, you were this high." She reached her hand up above her head, and then she reached on her tip-toes as high as she could, even jumping. "Now you're this high!"

Ren just stared at her. He didn't understand why she was here. If she was really four, then why would she have the clips? While he was occupied, she gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

"Mwah!"

She giggled again, then looked like she remembered something. She brought both of her ponytails from under her hair in front of her and took off the clips. He watched as she took his hand and placed them in it.

"You can have these back," she said casually.

Ren looked down at them. It felt like he was being stabbed through the heart. She had loved these so much…why was her younger self giving them back? He wanted so badly to ask her why, but not being able to talk made it impossible. She tugged his free hand.

"Come play with me!" she cried. She tried to pull him along, but eventually ran off by herself. She looked back at him, still trying to get him to follow her.

Ren squinted as he thought he saw something glisten in Pin-Mei's direction. It shined more. His eyes widened.

It was a sword.

Again, he couldn't call out to her, so he started sprinting toward her instead. The sword started flying toward her at an alarming speed. At the last moment, he dove and brought her to the ground, covering her with his body. He looked down at her, happy to see her safe, but then felt what he thought was a pinch on his back. His expression turned to that of horror.

The sword had gone through him and through Pin-Mei. Her heart began to bleed, and her eyes looked heavy. Still, she smiled.

"Niisama…please don't sleep on top of me…I don't like it…" Blood began to trickle from her mouth.

He couldn't stop shaking. He felt no pain. He wasn't bleeding. But the child under him was suffering, and he couldn't do anything about it.

"Niisama…I'm really tired…I'm going to go to sleep now, okay?" She closed her eyes and her head fell to the side.

He went numb. She had died, even when he thought he was saving her. This all seemed so unreal…

Her body melted into a pool of blood and vanished along with the sword in his back. He collapsed to the floor. If she was gone, did that mean that her older counterpart was, too? He couldn't stand the thought of her leaving, of never seeing her again. In anguish, he slammed his fist against the ground, harder and harder each time.

"Get up, Tao Ren."

He looked up to see a girl dressed in a black halter top and a long black skirt with slits up the side. Bracers were on her arms and small black shorts could be seen under her skirt. Her hair was chin-length and dark purple with a clip on top of her head holding her bangs from her face. As she moved toward him, he noticed two long thin braids trailing behind her.

_Pin-Mei?_

He staggered as he ran to hug her tight. Although he couldn't voice his relief, he was just glad to know that she was okay. She gave a sad look over his shoulder before gently pushing him away. He looked at her, confused.

"I'm not Pin-Mei," she said in a remorseful but stern voice.

That was when he looked at her more closely. Her eyes were blue, and their look was sadder with less innocence. She was a little taller, and she was not as flat as Pin-Mei was.

The girl gently placed her fingertips on his lips, then removed them. "You can speak now," she said.

Ren blinked, then grabbed her shoulders. "Where is she? Where's Pin-Mei?" he yelled at her. "And why do you look like her?"

Her expression didn't change. "You're afraid she's gone, aren't you?" He just stared at her, uneasy. "Your suspicions are correct, she has left you. You cannot follow her. Your parents will not tell you where she is. You won't see her tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after…"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm saying that you have two choices: You can keep trying to find a way to get to her until you die, or you can forget about her and move on. It's your choice."

He grasped her harshly again. "If you know so much, then when WILL I see her?"

She still remained placid. "That is not for me to decide. Whether you really want to waste the time and energy going after her is your own choice. It has nothing to do with me."

He was getting angrier by the second. "Then why the hell are you here?"

"To give you this." She handed him the pink rose ring.

He gawked at it. Another present given back. He clutched it and glared at her. "Why do you have this?"

"It came into my possession upon entering. Pin-Mei must have discarded it."

"She wouldn't! She loved it!"

She shrugged. "Again, not under my control." She looked behind her. "If you have anything else you need to take up with me, you should do it quickly."

He looked at her skeptically. "Why?"

"Because…"

A sword came from behind her drove through her, slamming her against Ren, who again felt no pain nor bled. The girl looked up at him, and he looked down at her with pained eyes.

"Have you made your decision?…Will you go after her?" Her voice was beginning to give out.

Ren gave her a muddled expression, then suddenly softened. He was beginning to understand why she was being harsh.

"Yes…if she really is gone, then I'll go and bring her back."

She smiled. "Good…That's what I was hoping for. I don't want her to be unhappy…You'll be a good husband…"

The sword disintegrated and she fell to the floor. He turned his head to the side and tried not to look as her body melted into a pool of blood. She resembled Pin-Mei so much that it felt like she was the one who was died, and not this stranger.

The sound of crying met his ears. He snapped his head up.

"I'd know that sound anywhere…"

He bolted in the direction the noise was coming from. It kept getting louder until he finally saw her, kneeling on the floor, her hair long and spread about her, her back turned to him. Cream colored ceremonial robes were draped over her shoulders. He was half-smiling, half-worried as he approached her; happy to see her, but not to see her crying.

"Pin-Mei, what's wrong?" He reached out to put his hand in her shoulder, but she quickly turned and pushed him away.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" she screamed.

Ren stumbled back and stared at her. The robes slid off her shoulder to reveal scars on her back. As his eyes fixed on them, she glared at him.

"Don't act like you don't know where these came from," she said in a hateful voice. "You did this to me."

He tensed. "What do you mean?"

She scoffed at him. "Tch…Always hurting me…Being cold to me…but still having the gall to tell me you love me…Grandmother was right…I should have just gone home." She threw something at him. "I don't need nor do I want this anymore. You can have it back."

His heart stopped. He swallowed hard as he bent down to pick up her engagement ring. It glistened before the diamonds shattered in his hand. His eyes showed the projection of an excruciating pain that no human being could ever live through on their own. He looked up at her. She had a pleased look on her face.

"Maybe now you've felt about ten percent of the pain you've inflicted on me."

He could barely breathe. She had never shown him this side of her. "…Pin-Mei…why?"

Her face was hard and cold again. "Don't insult me by acting like you've been perfect this whole time. I gave you everything I could, and even then it wasn't enough…you felt the need to take even more from me!" She smirked at his further confused and pained expression. "You want to see the latest masterpiece you've carved into me?" She stood up and allowed the robes to drop as she moved her hair to the front. Ren gasped.

He was staring at her bare back, a large scar resembling his emblem was cut into it, still bleeding. She turned around to face him, her long hair covering her disrobed body. Scars covered her torso, legs, and every other part he could see.

"I hope you're pleased with yourself. These scars will never fade. My body will always remember how you've wronged me. I will always have this ugly scarred body, for the rest of my life, a symbol of your "love"".

His head drooped to cover his eyes. "…I'm sorry…I didn't think I was hurting you," he said. She saw a tear roll down his cheek. "I **do** love you. I told you to never forget that, but you obviously have." He looked up at her, and she could see more tears coming. "Your body isn't ugly, so stop saying stupid things. I'm sorry if I put those scars on you, but they don't make you ugly. Nothing could make you ugly to me."

Her eyes quivered and tears fell. "Ren…" She covered her face with her hands and knelt down again as she cried. He smiled weakly at her.

Then his eyes shot open. Three swords were hovering over her body. He started running toward her.

"Pin-Mei, move!" he yelled.

"What?" She looked up as they fell and sliced through her. As she bled, she collapsed to the ground, her eyes faded and soulless. Ren knelt down next to her.

"Pin-Mei! Pin-Mei, wake up!"

Her hand twitched. She spoke to him in a gargled whisper. "Will you hold my hand before I go?"

As the tears streamed down his face, he nodded and carefully held her hand.

She smiled. "Thanks…" She closed her eyes. "I love you, Ren…"

The hand went limp.

Ren screamed.


	27. Suddenly Alone

I never mean for Ren to look like the bad guy when they're young. Ren's just being "old" Ren. Any grammar errors in chibi-Pin-Mei's sentences are intentional.

**Disclaimer: I don't own Shaman King. If I did, Ren wouldn't have lotuses covering him up. I also do not own Bowflex. I have no desire to own that company. Unless Ren was the mascot. Then I'd own that thing faster than Hao pwnt his opponents in the Shaman Fight. **

**Notes: The italicized section is a flashback to ten years before. It's a continuation of the flashback from chapter five.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Seven: Suddenly Alone**

* * *

Ren sprang awake, breathing heavily. It had all been a dream. He breathed a sigh of relief before turning to tell Pin-Mei about the strange nightmare. As he looked to his left, his eyes widened.

She wasn't there.

Then he noticed his closed fist and opened it. Some of it hadn't been a dream. He looked at the clips, rose ring and engagement ring that lay in his hand. He kept shaking his head.

_This isn't happening…_

He leaped out of his bed and bolted to Pin-Mei's room.

* * *

_Ren slammed the slider door open and ran out into the rain. It poured down on him, and his tongari soon fell. He looked around, but all the rain made it impossible to see anything._

"_Pin-Mei!" he called out. _

_He could barely even hear himself over the sound of the rain hitting the roof and stone walkway. His skin was already beginning to feel raw. The rain was already creating large, deep puddles. Even the koi pond's level had risen. It was too dangerous to be out here, but that was all the more reason to find her._

_He ran to his training spot and looked to her sitting place on the rock. It was vacant. Uneasy, he looked toward the koi pond. If she had jumped or fallen in there, there was virtually no chance that she was alive. All the same, he ran over and called for her. Hearing nothing, he looked around for the next place to search._

_The closest thing to him was the armory, so he ran over and tried to open the door. It was locked. She couldn't be in there. He was running out of places to look. It didn't look good for Pin-Mei. There wasn't much time left. If he didn't find her…_

"_Shut up, don't think about that. I'll find the little brat, then put a cowbell on her so I'll know where she is all the time, then she can't run away."_

_He ventured into the bushes. The rain was partially filtered out through the trees. His vision and hearing improved as he walked further and further in. As he was walking, he spotted a piece of navy blue cloth on the ground. He picked it up and examined it._

"_Definitely hers. She has to be close by."_

_Surrounding him were the thick trunks of the many trees in the yard. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a piece of cloth quiver. He ran towards it and looked over, then breathed a sigh of relief._

_There was Pin-Mei, curled up in a ball, crying like a little baby, soaked to the bone. He kicked the root she was huddled near and she looked up at him. She looked scared, but then clung to his legs._

"_Wahhhh! Niisama!"_

_Ren rolled his eyes. "You cause a lot of trouble for me, you know, you little brat?" He suddenly got angry. "Do you have any idea how long I've been looking for you, huh? Now I'm soaked and my hair's a mess, not to mention how much my clothes are killing my skin right now. If I get sick, you're really gonna get it!"  
_

"_I'm sorry, Niisama! But…I was so scared! I thought the water was gonna eat me! I thought I was gonna die! I…I love my mom, but I don't want to be with her yet!" She continued to cry into his legs._

_He looked down at her, then straight ahead. For a moment he thought he saw someone standing off in the distance, but as he blinked, they vanished. He discarded the illusion and looked back down at her. He had had it with her clinging to him, but he knew that if he kicked her off, she'd just cry more, so he manually removed her and placed her a few feet in front of him. She ran back and hugged his legs again._

"_What is it with you?" he yelled at her. "You're always around me! You follow me everywhere! I hate it! And then you throw a goddamn barbell at me! I'm just so sick of having to take care of you!"_

_She stared up at him, then took a few steps back. "Niisama, come here."_

_He glared at her, but then bent down. She cocked her head as she looked at the dried blood around his nose. A look of extreme guilt appeared on her face. "Close your eyes," she said. After a groan, he did. She smiled and then kissed him on the nose. He flinched and grabbed it as if she had hit him instead. _

"_What do you think you're doing?"_

"_Daddy says that mommy used to kiss places that hurt, and they got better. I wanted your boo-boo to get better."_

"_It's a cut, so call it a cut. Only two year-olds use the word boo-boo."_

"_I wanted your cut to get better."_

_He stared at her. "Get up. We're going inside."_

"_I **am** up."_

"_Be quiet. Just come on." _

_He stood up and started heading for the house. She ran up next to him and held his hand. He shook her off. She frowned, then ran to grab his hand again. Again, he shook her off. When she tried for a third time, he slapped the hand away and turned around angrily to face her._

"_Why won't you just leave me alone?" he yelled._

_Pin-Mei looked slightly hurt, but tried not to waver. "I really like Niisama," she said quietly. "Niisama pays attention to me. Niisama takes care of me. Niisama was the only one who came to find me. I know that Niisama is a good person even though he's mad all the time."_

_The last thing she said was a little surprising to him. Ren turned his head so he didn't have to look at her. He wasn't going to soften for this brat._

"_I'm not going to be here for a lot more time…but I want to spend the rest of the time with Niisama. I know that Niisama doesn't like me a lot, but I like him…"_

"_You still haven't told me why."_

"_Niisama is really kind."_

"_Pshhh…"_

"…_And cute too."_

_He stopped. She didn't just say that, did she? Isn't four too young to go around saying people are cute and that you like them? Honestly, she was so weird. All the same, he finally turned back toward the house and let his right hand dangle at his side._

"_Come on, let's go. I'm sick of being wet," he said harshly._

_After a moment, Pin-Mei smiled and ran up to him, gripping his hand once again. _

_He looked over at her._

"_Brat…"_

* * *

Ren threw Pin-Mei's door open.

"Pin-Mei?"

She didn't reply.

Refusing to believe she wasn't there, he desperately searched the room as he had done only a couple days before. He ripped the sheets off, hoping to find her there. Nothing. Her wardrobe was bare, as was her bureau. All traces of her had been erased from the room. Not even a single strand of her hair could be found. He ran outside.

_She'll be there_, he kept telling himself. _She was there before. She's almost always outside. I'll find her there. She'll jump out, say something stupid like 'I got you!' or 'Just kidding!', I'll get mad, but then we'll go back inside, and it'll be just like before…_

He ran to his training area. Not there. She wasn't in the armory, either. He ran into the woods, getting a little frantic. He searched among the trunks, and, not finding anything, darted toward the beach.

_She'll be there, throwing rocks again…_

But when he arrived, she was nowhere in sight. He looked around, turning this way and that, walking backwards at times as he turned.

"Pin-Mei!" he kept calling out. "You've had your fun, it's time to come out! This isn't funny anymore!"

A rock came up behind him and he tripped, falling onto the sand. He lay there for a few minutes, trying to take in the situation and decide what to do next. Slowly, he got up and went back inside the house.

As he walked by the hall leading to the weight room, a sudden glint of hope appeared before him.

_Of course! I didn't check there!_

He ran and opened the door, expecting to see her sitting on her bench with her cooler of milk, waiting for him. It was empty. Still he had to look. When he went to look on the left side of the room, he froze.

A machine that he didn't recognize was sitting in the corner. He walked over to it and set the rings and clips and slip of paper on a nearby window sill. He ran his hand over the metal and the padding. It was one of those all-in-one home gym systems. A Bowflex. It had pullies for lifting weight as well as structures for bicep curls and rowing, and everything else he needed.

"How did this…"

"That was Pin-Mei's gift to you."

Ren turned to see his mother standing in the doorway. He could tell she was trying to smile, despite the situation. She walked toward him.

"As she left, Suo ordered her to take it back, but she insisted that it stay here. She really wanted you to have it. She said that she knows nothing about gym equipment, but she thought this was a good one since it was expensive."

Ren couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "She's so naïve." He snapped back to reality. "Where is she? Where's Pin-Mei?"

Ran gave him a remorseful look. "She's gone, Ren. She went back home."

"What?" He took a step toward her. "Why? If she was leaving, then why didn't she wake me up?"

She looked at the floor. "Ren, darling, turn around."

He didn't understand, but did as she said. Then he felt her gently run her fingertips down his back.

"Mom, what are you doing?"

She shook her head sadly, then retrieved a mirror from her sleeve. She turned him so his back was to the mirror-lined wall, then handed him the hand mirror.

"Move it so you can see your back." He did, and then he saw it.

The scar from curse brand.

"What the hell is that?" he asked as he lowered the mirror.

"It is the remnants of a curse brand." She sighed, knowing what she had to say next. "Last night, according to Xu Zhang, Xu Kai placed a curse on you. As a result…you…you tried to rape Pin-Mei."

CRASH

Ren dropped the mirror and stared at his mother. "Don't…don't even joke about that…I would never do that…Never…I promised her I'd wait…no matter how long it took…I'd never try to take that away from her…"

She looked at him sadly. "Jun broke into your room after she heard Pin-Mei scream. When Zhang, your father, and I arrived, you were on top of her. Her robes were undone…she was practically naked in front of you…You were holding her wrist to the mattress, and she was crying. You both were.

"The guards pulled you off of her, and she came over and touched your face. You said her name, and the guards knocked you out and were taking you away when she pleaded with En not to throw you downstairs. …We put you in your bed…and Pin-Mei went into her room and cried all night until they left.

"Suo demanded that the engagement be annulled, and at the time, we didn't understand what was going on, so we had to comply with her. As they left, Pin-Mei made your father promise not to throw you in the torture chamber. She looked awful…circles under her eyes, her eyes themselves were red and puffy, her face was tear-stained…I think she knew what was going on from the very beginning."

Ren swallowed. It was hard to take all of this in. "…What do you mean?"

"She knew you didn't mean to take her. She kept saying that she forgave you, that you didn't mean it, and that it wasn't right for you to be punished. In her eyes, those tears you cried came from the you inside that knew that what you were doing was wrong. She wouldn't leave until she knew that you'd be safe from any punishment whatsoever."

Ren by now had drooped his head so that his bangs covered his eyes. "I see…"

Ran tried to comfort her son. "Please take comfort in the fact that she cared about you very much, and that your well being was very important to her."

He stood rigid for a moment. "I'm going to her house." He walked past her on his way to the door.

"You can't Ren."

He stopped. "Why not?"

"Zhang made us promise that you wouldn't come looking for her. It's dangerous for the both of you. This is Suo's doing, and if you go to take Pin-Mei, a lot of danger could befall her if Suo knows you're coming."

"THEN WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?" he yelled, turning to her.

"Wait."

"Wait?"

"Wait. They aren't even home yet. Wait and see what unfolds. Maybe things will work out on their own."

"You expect me to sit here while that witch goes on controlling the life of the person I love!"

"I'm sorry, Ren, but there isn't anything else that can be done right now. Please, if you really love her that much, you'll wait."

He stared at her for a few moments, then went back and sat on the Bowflex bench. "Fine."

"Ren…"

"Can you leave, please?"

"Of course…" She looked at him sadly before she left and closed the door.

The moment it closed, Ren released all the anguish that he had held inside from his mother. He put his face in his hands and let the few tears that were allowed to escape come, although they did not accurately show the amount of grief he held in his heart.

As he collected himself and prepared to go back to his room, if not only to place Pin-Mei's discarded jewelry somewhere in a drawer, he noticed the slip of paper. It had never occurred to him to read it, so he picked it up and unfolded it. As he read it, his eyes became more pained.

He dropped it and punched the wall as hard as he could, making a large hole. He slumped down the wall to the floor and put his forehead against it, a few more tears escaping. The slip of paper fluttering down to the floor, its writing facing toward the ceiling.

"_Keep the promise you made me on the beach._"


	28. Hua and the House of Tao

Pin-Mei's natural hair length is about to her thighs. In Ren's dream, her hair was a lot longer, like spread out over the floor (think Emeraude from Magic Knight Rayearth or Hinoto-Hime from X/1999). Just to make it clear, since Pin-Mei's hair has a part in this chapter.

Zhang was originally supposed to be a bad guy. After I had decided that Ren was going to be controlled, I had originally planned for him to meet with Zhang in order to formally tell him that he was going to marry Pin-Mei and that as Zhang left and passed him, he would put his hand on Ren's head and that would start it. I don't know why I decided that he would be a good guy. I guess I needed to have Pin-Mei have another person in her corner. If everyone was mean to her, she'd probably have killed herself before she even had the chance to meet Ren.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Eight: Hua and the House of Tao**

* * *

"Ah, here we are. So good to be back home," Suo said as she exited her carriage. A footman lent her his hand as she stepped onto the ground.

She looked to her granddaughter and son-in-law's carriage with a smirk on her face. Then she frowned.

Zhang got out and quickly walked to his daughter's side of the carriage. The door opened and Pin-Mei stood in the doorway to begin her descent to the ground. The light in her eyes had faded, and the circles under her eyes were darker than ever. It seemed that she was oblivious to everything around her.

"Go slow," he said to her.

She nodded slightly and began stepping down the small steps. As she stepped onto the second step, she slipped and fell forward, hitting the ground. Zhang hurriedly picked her up and handed her to a young footman.

"Put her in bed immediately; she hasn't slept in almost three days."

The servant nodded and carried her into the mansion. Suo watched them, then approached Zhang.

"You gave it to her, I see," she said in a sly voice. "That old Xu family potion. It keeps her awake for two whole days."

He turned away from her. "I have no idea what it is you're referring to."

She turned toward him. "I know what you're planning. You had to transfer it through your mouth because of how exhausted she was already. You wanted her to watch the scenery around her so she could ultimately find her way back to that savage lover. I'm telling you right now that I won't allow it. You know she'll be needed soon."

"She is not your daughter, so you cannot control her as you did with your own. Accept as I have that Hua is gone. No matter how much you control Pin-Mei, Hua isn't coming back."

"We'll see, won't we?"

He narrowed his eyes at her even more. "Do you really think that Hua would tolerate you tearing her daughter's life apart? Denying her the person that makes her happiest?"

"Hua had no time to know what it felt like to be a mother, all thanks to that wretched child. You should have listened to me when I told you to kill her the moment Hua closed her eyes. In fact, you should have never impregnated her in the first place."

"Aren't you forgetting that YOU were the one who wanted to continue the family as soon as possible? You weren't even thinking about Hua's health. Even after the complications began, all you could think about was her giving birth to a strong, healthy son. Hua knew it was going to be a girl, but she kept her anyway. Because of this whole thing, she wasn't the carefree, innocent girl I fell in love with anymore. All she could talk about was the baby and how excited it made her, and what she was going to name her, and…how glad she was that it was with me." He turned his face away as he remembered her voice.

"_I wouldn't have picked anyone else in the world to father this baby. It has to be with you, or not at all." She smiled, then laughed. "Or something like that."_

She scoffed at him, a cruel smile on her lips. "How very touching, Zhang. I was so sure that all those years with concubines had nullified your feelings. If you had really loved Hua as much as you say you did, then you would have never fallen into that despicable state. Grief can only go so far until it turns you into a boor. You didn't even begin to care about what Pin-Mei did until early last year. You ignored her for thirteen years, then suddenly decided to be a father to her. She probably thinks even less of you than I do."

"Believe what you like."

"Is that all?"

"Oh, just one thing. It would be in your best interest to release Pin-Mei as soon as she is better."

"Oh? And why is that?"

"Ren. From what I hear, the wrath of the Tao family is equal to that of a raging storm. Hua told me to do all in my power to have Pin-Mei marry into that family because she knew she'd be safe there. If the scion of Tao comes for her, you won't be spared."

"You can't scare me with your "knowledge" of the Tao family. He is but a boy, he means nothing in the grand scheme of things."

"Then I suppose I shall instruct the servants to stand by with mops to wipe your blood off the floor."

He walked past her and into the house. She stared after him, then smiled maliciously to herself.

"In short while, none of that is going to matter."

* * *

Pin-Mei woke up about two days later. It was dark outside as she sat up in bed. She looked to her right. The space was bare. She laughed quietly at herself for being so foolish as to think that he would be beside her.

_That's right…That's all in the past…Tao Ren is no longer my fiancé…I know he promised to come get me, but he doesn't even know where I am. He'll probably forget about me soon…_

She held in a few tears, then got up and left her room, heading outside.

As with Tao Castle, her courtyard ultimately led to a beach. After looking out over the water, still in her navy blue nightgown, she began to walk straight into the water. It soon reached her chest.

"Now kick your legs," she whispered to herself.

But as she tried, her body, still tired, sank underwater. She watched the surface get farther and farther away.

_Is this how I'm going to die?_ She closed her eyes and accepted her fate.

Ren's face flashed in her mind - how he had looked concerned when she almost drowned about two weeks before. Pin-Mei's eyes shot open and she pulled herself to the surface. After a few gasps of air, she swam up and down the shore, trying to retain all that Ren had taught her. An hour had passed by the time she went back to stand on the shore.

_I have to believe that he'll come_, she thought as she looked at the moon's reflection in the water. _I have to have faith that we'll be sleeping together again soon, that I'll be able to touch him, and kiss him, and hear his voice, and tell him how much I love him…and all the other things I love doing with him._

She thought of the last time she had touched him, and he, her. She placed her hands over her heart as a warm feeling radiated from it, and closed her eyes as she felt its quickening beat.

_Ren…_

* * *

Suo was waiting for her when she came back into the house. She eyed her angrily.

"Why are you wet?"

Pin-Mei looked down at her soaked nightgown. "I went for a swim," she replied, and continued on her way to the bathroom.

Suo grabbed her shoulder, turning her around, and slapped her across the face. Her wet skin only added to the pain.

"What do you think you're doing?" Suo yelled. "Going near the water! You can't swim!"

Pin-Mei stopped nursing her cheek. "Yes I can! Ren taught me!"

Her grandmother glared at her. "Don't you dare mention his name again!" She grasped Pin-Mei's loose hair and tugged on it. Pin-Mei screamed and was brought to her knees. "I'm not going to let go until you promise to forget about that boy!" She tugged again, eliciting another scream.

Pin-Mei's eyes were shut with tears of pain in their corners. She opened them slightly only to shut them again as yet another pull came.

"Say it!"

She whimpered.

"Say it and I'll stop!"

Another pull. Pin-Mei was gripping her hair, her head pounding.

"I…I…"

"Go on, child; Grandmother's listening…"

Pin-Mei shut her eyes, the pained tears rolling down her cheeks.

In her mind, she saw herself and Ren; when he had surprised her by being in her room, teaching her to swim, their snowball fight, how he had fought to protect her, their first kiss, his proposal, both of them cuddling together in bed (even if he had insisted he was not taking part in the cuddling)…

"_I need you to be with me…I want to claim you for myself…Will you stay with me forever?"_

"_Yes."_

She stopped crying, her eyes narrowed, and her voice got low. Suo's eyes widened as she looked up at her.

"Tug on my hair as hard as you possibly can."

"What?"

"I'll never betray Ren. Never. He loves me, and I love him. He's taken care of me since I was little, and I have no right to break faith with him. So do your worst. I won't give in."

"You ungrateful child!"

As she had requested, her hair was pulled as hard as it could be. Pin-Mei bit her lip and refused to scream or cry. Suddenly, it stopped. She looked up to see her father with Suo's wrist in his hand. He released her, shoving her into a wall.

"Don't touch my daughter again."

"Papa…"

He looked down at Pin-Mei and took her wrist.

"You must be hungry. Come." He pulled her up and patted her head gently, then began leading her into the dining room. She looked at the floor and stopped.

"No…I'm not…" She wriggled from his grasp. "I'm…going back to my room."

As she closed the door behind her and leaned against it, she spied her calendar on the back wall. She walked over to examine it.

January 1st was encased in a heart with a smiley face. "REN!" was written in large characters. Pin-Mei touched it as she remembered how excited she had been. Her old calendar from the previous year, since July 15th, had crosses on each day, a countdown in the corner, just to remind her how far away that day had been at one time.

Before she knew it, she was on the ground sobbing.

* * *

After taking a shower, Pin-Mei curled up on the ground, her hair still wet, and cried some more. At that point, it was the only thing she could think of doing. A knock on the door interrupted her pity party.

"Who is it?" she called, her voice hoarse.

"Us!"

Her voice dropped. "You may enter."

Rong, Ling, and Shu walked over to her in a single file line. She sat up and tried to make herself look presentable. "What is it?"

"We wanted to welcome you home!" they cried.

"We haven't seen you since that afternoon,"

"And since… 'that night,'"

"Um…we wanted to see how you were doing…"

Their mistress looked down. "Sorry…I'm not going to be any fun to be around…for a really long time…" Her bangs covered her eyes. They looked at her, concerned.

"Can we at least dry your hair?" Rong asked.

"I want to brush it," Ling said.

"Um…I'd like to do you nails…" Shu mumbled.

Pin-Mei looked at them. "Do what you want…"

They assembled around her, armed with hairdryers, brushes, and nail files. She stayed silent, as if she was in another dimension from them. After a while, Rong decided the silence was too much.

"Lady Pin-Mei, are you upset over that boy?"

Pin-Mei bit her lip. "What makes you think that?"

"Because of what happened…now you're home, but you're so depressed…you won't smile. Even if he did that to you, you miss him, don't you?"

She started crying again. "Yeah, yeah I do. You have no idea. Those two days in the carriage were torture, not being able to be with him. I still love him. I don't even think I could stop if I wanted to. It's been this way since I was four. I've always loved him. Even if I was too young to understand at the time…"

The three girls leaned in to listen better.

"He's been so good to me. He's done so much for me. Much more than I could ever do for him. Trying to save him from punishment was the first time I saved him in any way. He's saved me at least five times…and I can barely save him once! Even then, I have no way of knowing if I succeeded. I just…I need to go back to that house…to be with him…That's where I need to be...it's the only way I can sleep at night…with him holding me in his arms."

She realized what she had been saying and looked at the other girls. "I'm sorry," she said, wiping her tears away. Ling stopped her.

"Lady Pin-Mei, we believe in your judgment. If you believe that he is a good person, then we will stand behind you in believing that. Even if it kills us."

Pin-Mei looked at her. "Ling…"

Rong patted her head from behind. "Yeah, well, even though boys suck, he seemed nice enough, so yeah, you have my blessing and all that crap." Despite her words, her voice sounded reluctant.

"Rong…"

Shu started crying. They looked at her.

"Shu, what's the matter?"

Shu hid her face. "I…I did it…It's my fault…"

"What do you mean?" Pin-Mei asked, her eyes wide.

"I'm the reason that Lady Pin-Mei and Lord Ren are separated…"

"How…"

"I…I…" She looked up, taking her fogged glasses off.

"I told Mistress Suo about the party."

They all stared at her. Pin-Mei looked about ready to say something, but Rong moved first.

SLAP

"How dare you!" she yelled at the frightened girl. "We're Lady Pin-Mei's handmaids. We're supposed to protect her! You have no excuse for revealing the party to Mistress Suo!"

Pin-Mei looked from Shu to Rong and back to Shu. She reached out to her, and the girl flinched, expecting another slap. But a soft hand cupped her burning cheek. She looked up to see a kind smile.

"What happened?"

Shu just kept crying. "When…When you sent for us, Mistress Suo saw me and demanded that I tell her. She had her bladed fan at my neck and…and said that she'd have my family back in the country killed if I didn't tell her…I'm so sorry Lady Pin-Mei! I cannot be forgiven for this!"

The young Lady shook her head. "Incorrect. I would rather this happen than have your family slaughtered. You did the right thing." She looked down. "This is just more reason to go back to Tao Castle…no evil grandmothers…just an old guy with a pistol."

They stared at her. "That sounds a bit worse."

"He never pointed it at me. Ren got it a few times though."

"Scary…"

She hid her face behind a sleeve. "I'm going to need your help, you guys…it may be a while before I'm able to go back…so I'll need you all to help keep me strong…I want to be stronger…just like him…"

They all jumped on her. "You got it!"

"Ow…"


	29. Now, Then, and Soon

I tend to get anxiety in the dark sometimes, only when it's quiet. Lately, the Iron Maiden from Resident Evil 4 has been making me think he's going to come get me. (For the record, it is not related to Jeanne) Thus, I enlisted Ren to walk with me and make sure I wasn't killed. However, he's all depressed about Pin-Mei, so I had to call up Hitsugaya to lend a hand also, because depressed people might get occupied, and that means we have a dead Jezebel on our hands. The Taicho has some free time since in the fillers he's been relieved of operational duty (I don't really know what that means, but I think it means he's having an unwanted vacation).

You might think I'm weird, but if I didn't have such an active imagination, we wouldn't have this looooooong story on our hands.

Did I mention how much I love you guys?

**Notes: The first italicized section is a dream. The second one is a flashback to after Ren and Pin-Mei returned from their trip.**

**There's an implied-but-not-outright-said Spoiler in this chapter from episodes 59 and 60. You've been warned.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Twenty-Nine: Now, Then, and Soon**

* * *

"_Ren! Please! Don't go! Please come back! Please don't leave me alone! I love you!"_

_She was kneeling on the floor cradling Ren's limp body in her arms. There were five deep wounds on his body; one on each of his wrists and feet, and one in his chest. His body felt cold._

"_Ren…"_

_She brushed back his bangs to look at his face, which had a content smirk on it. Her tears fell on his face and down his cheeks. She clutched his body tighter, his head against her chest. Then she did the only thing she could do at that point: scream._

"_REEEEN!" _

_His body vanished._

_That was when she heard a voice. It was one she had only heard a few times, but didn't who it belonged to, only that it was a woman's._

"_Pin-Mei…listen to me…"_

_She looked up from her crying and stood. "Wh-Who's there?"_

"_I can't tell you right now…I apologize. But I need to make sure you know this."_

"_What? Know what?"_

"_Very soon, Xu Pin-Mei, you will have to make a life or death decision. This will not only affect you, but Ren as well."_

"_Do you…Do you mean I'll see him again?"_

"…_Yes…"_

"_Soon?"_

"…_Yes…"_

_A bright smile spread across her face. _"_I'm so happy! Thank you!"_

"_You're missing the point. You will have to make this decision on your own. No one, not even Ren will be able to help you. It will be your choice and your choice alone. It may not be easy for you, but I know you'll make the right decision…"_

* * *

Pin-Mei quickly sat up. She slowly touched her heart, which was beating fast. "What was that?"

It had been almost a month since her return home. There had been no word from Ren, and Suo was still determined to inflict as much emotional and physical pain on her as possible. Rong, Ling, and Shu had decided on their own that they would sleep on the floor around Pin-Mei's bed, reasoning that it would help them protect her.

A head appeared from the ground to her left. "Lady Pin-Mei, what is it?" Rong asked.

Pin-Mei touched her temple. "It was nothing…just a dream…" _That's right Pin-Mei, it was just a dream._

Rong crawled onto her bed. "You mean a nightmare." She sighed. "Lady Pin-Mei, we can't help you if you keep everything inside. C'mere." She laid Pin-Mei back down on the bed and got behind her, wrapping her arms around her master. "Just pretend I'm him, okay?"

"Rong, I really don't think…"

Pin-Mei fell silent. Rong, the strongest and least ladylike of the three, had amazingly well-toned arms. Even if just a little, they _did_ remind her of him. They may not have been as strong or large as his, but just the thought provided her with at least a little bit of comfort. She wondered if this is what he felt like when he was her age. Calmed, she quickly fell asleep again.

When she was sure her mistress was asleep, Rong gently let her lips graze Pin-Mei's neck. "I show you...You don't need him," she whispered. "I'll love you more than he ever could."

Pin-Mei let out a sigh as her eyes twitched. It was obvious to Rong who was the one filling her dreams.

* * *

"_I wish I could have seen you compete in the Shaman Fight."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because I want to know what you were like a few years ago."_

"_I wasn't much different from how I am now."_

"_HoroHoro said that you acted a lot like how you did when you came to rescue me."_

_He looked at her, uneasy. "…He told you that?"_

_She nodded. "Uh-huh. He said that you killed some people when you cut their car in half, and you tried to kill Yoh and Ryu, and you killed your Shaman Fight official, and-"_

_He covered her mouth. She looked over at him, his hair hid his eyes._

"_I don't like to be reminded of that…" he said quietly._

_She stared at him as he moved his hand away. He rested it on his knee, then clenched it as he stood up._

"_I'm going to take a shower…" He walked away from her. _

_After thinking about the situation for a few minutes, she clenched her own fist and tried to punch herself in the face._

"_Dummy." _

_She could still hear the water running from the weight room's shower. She got up and ran over to enter the room. As she quietly closed the door behind her, she tiptoed around the shower to the towel bin. Opening it, she took the softest, warmest, and largest one she could find. Then she sat and waited for the water to shut off._

_Once it did, she stood against the clouded fiberglass walls near the door, facing away from where Ren had been bathing. As she heard it open, she closed her eyes and thrust her arm out to her left, towel in hand._

"_Here!"_

_Ren blinked at the cloth, then slowly took it. "Thanks." After he wrapped it around him, he came out and saw her staring at the floor, her fists clenched in front of her. He looked at her quizzically. "What is it?"_

_She looked up at him with shameful eyes, then quickly hugged him._

"_Hey-"_

"_I'm sorry!"_

"_What?"_

"_I'm sorry I said those things about killing people! I shouldn't have! It was a dumb! I wasn't thinking about how you felt! I'm sorry I hurt you!"_

_He looked down at her, then sighed. "You say a lot of stupid things, you know that?"_

_She looked up at him like a beaten puppy. He put his hand on her head. _

"_Don't dwell on things. They lead to grudges. And grudges can be a horrible thing."_

_She put her forehead against his chest. "I'm still sorry…It's just that…he was telling me all about it because I asked him to, and when I asked about you, he said that stuff." She squeezed him. "But then, he said that you became a better person, and that he knew that you cared about everyone, even if you acted like you didn't. He said that you saved his life once."_

_He was silent for a moment. "He didn't…tell you what happened, did he?"_

"_What?"_

"_Like…details?"_

_She blinked. "No. Why? What happened?"_

_He breathed a sigh of relief. "Never mind."_

"_No! I wanna know!"_

"_And I want to get dressed, so I'm going now."_

"_HEY! I'll take that towel back!"_

_He looked back at her slyly. "I bet you'd like to." Then continued walking away. Pin-Mei huddled in the corner, trying to figure out where her innocence had gone._

* * *

"Ren, darling, you have some mail," Ran called as her son walked in from training outside. She handed him a thick envelope.

Ren examined it as he walked down the hall to his room. At first, he had no idea what it was. Then he saw the address: it was from Japan. A photo studio in Japan. They were the pictures of Pin-Mei. He stopped, turned around, and headed for the study instead.

Once inside, he sat down in one of the large armchairs and carefully opened his precious parcel. He took a deep breath. The first time he'd been able to see a real picture of her in almost a month. This was going to be painful. He slipped the photos out and laid them on the table.

They were beautiful. Nearly every one was a scene of perfection.

_At least it wasn't a waste of money._

He began separating them by which ones he liked best. To his surprise, he actually liked one of the mistakes. In one shot, Pin-Mei had turned to look at him and wave, exposing her profile. He remembered them getting irritated at her and threatened to make Ren leave if she wouldn't pay attention. He smiled.

When he was done, he looked around the room absentmindedly. His piles of books were still on the tables. After a sigh, he decided he should put them back. He was surprised to discover that the books were already in order.

_Whatever…just makes it easier for me…_

As he was putting away the stack containing the most recent records, he wobbled and a couple of the books fell to the floor. He groaned and put away the ones in his hands, then went to retrieve the fallen ones.

Ren stopped.

On the floor, wide open, was the photo album. Its pages were turned to show the pictures of the couple as children. In the corner was their photo club sticker.

"Pin-Mei…"

He picked the book up and returned to his chair. Flipping through the pages, he found the photos of himself and his family, things he had never seen before. He flipped the page with the sticker on it to find a picture of him with everyone from Japan the night they had come to help him defeat his father.

They sat around a table eating. Ren at the head, HoroHoro next to his right, sniffing the food to make sure it wasn't tainted; Yoh to his left, then Jun, his mother and grandfather, and Ryu and Manta.

_I think I need to go back there. To Japan._

He was about to get up, but first he took his favorite picture from one of the piles. After looking at it and smiling weakly, he placed it in the album. She was kneeling in a field of flowers with her hands in her lap. Her smile was sweet, not too big, and not too small. She looked almost delicate, a quality she didn't usually possess. After placing it in, he took a picture of the both of them and added it also.

Pin-Mei had demanded that Ren be in at least a few of the pictures, but instead they gave her a few minutes with him, telling them to go for a walk. Little did they know that some candids had been taken as they did so. The result was a picture of them standing on the small bridge hugging, her head on his chest and his head on hers. A content smile was on both their lips.

"The clever bastards…"

He shut it and left the room.

_I need to get away from here…at least for a while._

So it was off to Japan.

* * *

Back at the Xu/Fan mansion, Pin-Mei awoke as her body was shaken by a warm hand. At first, she rolled over and tried to ignore it, but it persisted and she finally had to answer it.

"What the heck…is it?"

Her father came to whisper in her ear.

"It's time, Pin-Mei. Rong, Ling, and Shu are already prepared. Rurikka has been readied as well. Put on your mother's training uniform so you can ride her."

"Whaaaa?"

"All is ready…

Tonight, you're going back."


	30. Clipped Wings

Pin-Mei really isn't all that strong. She has a 1000 Furyoku level at most. However, the Fan family will be changing that a few chapters from now…

On a random note, have you guys heard the new ending theme to Nana? "Starless Night" by Olivia? It's such an awesome song. It also kinda fits because of how Ren talks about the stars and stuff. They also say in plain English "endless love". I use it as an "ending theme" for this chapter. Yes, I DO do that opening-ending theme that I spoke of in the chapter 26 notes for most chapters. Helps me think. This is the "we're still separated, but we still love each other zomgangst" theme. Haha. I love my mind.

**Notes: Pin-Mei's horse's name is Rurikka. It's my poor attempt at making a name. It means "Red Snow."**

**If Hua were still alive, she would presently be 28 (her birthday is June 10). Kai is about 25. If you're confused about Pin-Mei's family tree, this chapter should clear it up.**

**Kai's wind and fire wheels are the exact same thing as Axel's weapons from Kingdom Hearts. Yes, they ARE actual weapons.  
**

"**Niisan" is a step down from "Niisama". Pin-Mei acknowledges that Kai is her older brother, but obviously doesn't respect him as much as she does Ren.**

"**Imouto" is "younger sister".**

"**Neesama" means… you guessed it: "older sister."**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty: Clipped Wings**

* * *

"You're going back tonight."

Her eyes shot open. She looked up at him. "Going back? You mean…"

He nodded. "I'm sending you back to Ren. You've been here long enough. I think it's time for you to go back where you belong."

"Papa…" She wiped away a few tears.

He patted her. "Come now. This isn't a time to be crying. Hurry and get dressed. You need to leave before Suo comes back."

She nodded and he left as she got dressed. When she emerged, she was wearing a dark purple tunic with cloth straps on her wrists and matching pants. Her handmaids met her as she exited her room.

"You ready?" Rong asked, a small smirk on her face.

Pin-Mei nodded. "More than. Come on, Ma Ying."

Ma Ying appeared next to her. "Yes, Mistress."

Zhang approached them. "Then hurry to the gates. There isn't much time."

They ran until they had exited the house and were at the stables. Pin-Mei went up to a red mare and patted its face. "This is going to be a long journey. I hope you're as ready as Papa thinks you are." The horse nuzzled its nose against her cheek. She giggled. "I guess I'll have to take your word for it. Thank you, Rurikka."

As she made her way back to the gates, she saw her large bird cage. It contained small white birds that she had taken care of since she was little. They apparently had been her mother's at one time. She looked at it, then put her hands on the door.

"I'm flying away, so you all should do the same." She pulled the cord and the door opened. They wasted no time flapping their wings and escaping. Pin-Mei smiled as they vanished from sight.

She guided her steed to the edge of the gate and looked past the long stone bridge toward the mountains. They were dark and foggy. She looked behind her to see her three companions on their own horses, her father choosing to remain on the ground.

"Papa! Aren't you coming with us?"

He shook his head. "No. I will remain here."

His daughter ran to him. "Why? I need you to be there! How am I supposed to get back without you there with me?" She thrust her arms around him, refusing to let go. He gently pushed her away.

"Someone needs to distract Suo when she returns. That job is mine."

"But-"

"This is how your mother would have wanted it."

She looked at the ground. He bent down to kiss her forehead.

"You'll be fine. Be strong. Think about your goal: reaching Tao Castle. That should be the only thought in your mind."

"You're wrong! I'm not strong! Not like you, or Mother, or Ren!"

"Ah, now I see why…" He pulled a DaDao from his robe sleeve and held it out to her. Pin-Mei looked up at it with wide eyes.

"Minbouken…" she whispered.

Zhang nodded. "Yes. Hua's…your mother's precious sword. Minbouken- the Blade of the People's Hopes. Let it give you strength as it gave her." He released it into her hands.

She kept staring at it, then looked up at him. "I promise to honor my mother's memory!" she declared. She ran and mounted Rurikka, then turned the horse to give her final farewell to her father.

"I'll be waiting for you, Father!" she cried. Then she turned the horse and started down the bridge, Rong, Ling, and Shu following her. Ma Ying trailed behind.

Zhang smiled weakly as his daughter disappeared from his sight. "Things are going just as you said, my dear Hua."

"_Zhang, in about fifteen years, our families will be no more. The Xu and Fan families will have died out. I'll die soon. You'll die. Mother will die, as will my brother."_

"_Hua…what about Pin-Mei?"_

_Hua gently caressed her stomach, a sad look in her eyes._

"I suppose it is time I join you, my love."

A sword impaled him from behind. Still smiling, he fell to the ground, blood spilling everywhere.

"I'll be with you soon…Hua…"

Suo stepped next to his body. She looked down at him in disgust. "Silence him." A nearby guard brought a sword straight down. She breathed a sigh of relief. "Ah, much better."

An army of men appeared behind her. She laughed behind a fan. "It's time to put the bird back in its cage."

"Right you are, Mother." Kai appeared beside her. "I hope you don't mind that I would like to hunt down my "sister" myself."

She laughed again. "Not at all. Go right ahead. Have fun, son."

He smiled, baring his teeth maliciously. "You're too kind."

* * *

"Lady Pin-Mei! At the rate we're going, we should reach Tao Castle in about a day!" Shu called up.

"'Kay!" she nodded. She turned to Ma Ying, who was floating beside her. "I wish Suo hadn't put that spirit barrier up around the mansion. Then I could have at least sent you there so you could have spoken to Ren."

"I apologize. If I could have made it past our gates, I would have."

"Don't worry about it. Everything's going to be as it should soon." She smiled. Ma Ying looked at her sadly. Pin-Mei didn't notice. She just continued to smile as she thought about being able to be with the one she loved most once again.

Then, she was reluctantly snapped back to reality.

"Lady Pin-Mei! We have trouble!" Ling called.

_Trouble?_

She looked back and gasped. An army of Kyonshii soldiers was quickly gaining on them. She looked forward again, trying to decide what to do.

_But…only Ren's family has Kyonshii…Don't tell me…Suo used the time she spent at the party to steal the charms used to bind them…then make a massive army…She was never away from the start!_

She directed a death glare back at her pursuers.

_First you hurt Ren…now you're using his family just to get to me…that's something I just can't forgive…_

She stopped Rurikka and turned around. Rong, Ling, and Shu mimicked her, but only out of disbelief.

"Lady Pin-Mei! What are you doing?" Rong yelled.

Pin-Mei dismounted and brandished Minbouken. "I'm not going to tolerate things like this anymore! Excuse my French, but I'm sick of this crap!"

They stared at her. "That's not French."

"Yeah, for it to be French, you'd have to say shi-,"

Rong and Shu covered Ling's mouth.

Pin-Mei's eyes narrowed. "Doesn't matter. Assemble and get ready for offense!"

"You got it!"

Ling went to Pin-Mei's right, Shu to her left, and Rong behind her. Ma Ying appeared above her.

"I am ready mistress."

"Excellent." She watched the approaching soldiers. "Everyone, oversoul."

They nodded and did as she commanded; Rong with a whip, Ling with a chakram, and Shu with meteor hammers.

Pin-Mei raised her hand palm-up to the sky. "Ma Ying! Hyoi Gattai! In Minbouken!"

The sword glowed a purple shade and seemed to have small wings at the hilt as she stood firm and waited for the opportune moment to attack. As they drew closer, she charged. Her bodyguards followed her lead.

She found it surprisingly easy to cut through the Kyonshii. It didn't bother her of course. She just shrugged it off as them being imperfect copies. When all of them had been defeated, she knelt on the ground, panting.

"We…did it," she said. The other girls nodded through their own panting.

As the dust settled, Pin-Mei looked up and saw something moving within the clouds. Her eyes widened as Kai emerged and stood about ten feet in front of her. She slowly stood up.

"Nii…Niisan…" she whispered.

Kai chuckled. "Niisan? Is that all that I get? You're making your older brother sad, Imouto."

"You…came back…"

He smiled sweetly. "That I have, Imouto. However…" His pair of wind and fire wheels appeared in each of his hands. "Unfortunately, your brother is going to have to punish you."

She tensed. "For what…?"

He assumed a throwing position, his eyes wild. "FOR KILLING MY NEESAMA!"

He thrust the wheels at her. She was paralyzed as they shot towards her.

"Mistress! We must move!" Ma Ying cried.

At the last moment, Ling and Shu stepped in the way and took the full force of the blows. They fell to either side of her in a bloody mess. Pin-Mei could only look down at them.

"Ling…Shu…" She looked at Kai. "Why, Niisan? Why?"

He laughed. "You still don't understand, do you?" He caught the wheels as they came back to him. After admiring their bloody coating, he licked one, his eyes still on her. "No matter…I suppose you don't need to understand anyway. Now, Imouto, let's go back home. Suo says she won't punish you as harshly if you just come back now."

Pin-Mei looked terrified. "Suo…she…she's back?"

He nodded happily. "Oh yes. And you made sure to say goodbye to Father, right?"

"What…?"

He only laughed.

"What's wrong with Papa? TELL ME!"

Rong stepped in front of her, barring her from charging. "Lady Pin-Mei, get back on Rurikka and continue on to Tao Castle. I'll deal with Kai."

"But…"

"Lady Pin-Mei…he isn't your brother at all. He may only call himself that because you look like Lady Hua, but he is Lady Hua's younger brother. You were made to believe otherwise so he could hide and work on their fourteen-year-old plan. He didn't run away at all. He's been in the deepest part of the mansion, plotting this entire thing."

"…Plan?"

Rong turned to her. "Yes, what they want is-,"

The wheels sliced through her and she fell to the ground. Pin-Mei knelt by her side.

"Rong! Rong! Please say something!"

Rong turned her head and smiled weakly. "Run…" she whispered. "Go so you can be with Ren…That's what will make you happy, right?" _As much as I hate to admit it..._

"Rong…" Tears fell down her cheeks. "Why?"

"We were chosen to protect you, Pin-Mei. We all came to love you. We want to see you happy. You hardly smiled after you came home. We just want you to be with the one who makes you happy…"

"But that's no reason to kill yourselves!"

Rong ignored her. "Pin-Mei…may I see your smile…one last time?"

Through her tears, Pin-Mei tried to think of something happy and smiled as best she could. Rong smiled again.

"That's it…that's the smile…the three of us…loved so much…Make sure…you smile…for Ren…I'll bet…he…loves…it…too…"

Her eyes closed, the smile still on her face. Pin-Mei was at all loss. All she could do was stare. She had never been so close to death. It scared her. She wanted to get out. She wanted to go home…

She stood. _If I want to go home, I have to defeat Kai. I won't rest until I'm in the place I belong…with Him._

She pointed Minbouken at her uncle. "I can't forgive you…" she whispered.

He placed his hand near his ear. "I'm sorry, I didn't catch that."

Her oversoul grew as she hid her eyes.

"They were the only friends I had…For killing them…I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!"

She charged at him. He brandished a simple sword and challenged her. Their blades pressed against each other, Kai pushing down on her and she pushed up. The difference in their height was easily seen, and visibly left her at a disadvantage. She gritted her teeth as she tried to overpower him. Kai smiled.

"Look at you, Pin-Mei. Running around in my sister's clothes, using her most cherished weapon. Why, you must think you ARE my sister, after all."

Pin-Mei pushed against him harder. "No. Being your sister is a position that is too shameful for me to take."

He frowned. "Pity."

He easily overpowered her and kicked her away. She hit the ground and continued rolling away. When she stood, he noticed blood covering the left side of her face.

"Whoopsies, my mistake. Mother made me promise I wouldn't damage your face any more than it is already. I'm going to be in so much trouble…"

She panted a few times, the gritted her teeth again. "Don't make fun of me!"

"I'm only stating the truth. Your beauty pales in comparison to Hers."

His words stung her. She looked at the ground. "He…He never said I was ugly…He never said I was beautiful without makeup on...but it wasn't like him to say things like that anyways. His opinion is the only one that counts! Not yours!"

She charged and leaped up into the air. He met her as she attempted to bash him into the ground.

"You love that Tao boy too much," he commented.

She smirked. "Don't get jealous just because I have someone who cares about me."

His face surged with anger. A blast of Furyoku came from the sword and Pin-Mei was blasted up into the air, then hit the ground with a sickening thud. Her oversoul shattered, and Ma Ying floated above her motionless body.

"Mistress!"

Kai walked toward her and picked her up by her hair, bringing her to her level. She winced in pain. Tears fell down her face, though she was in too much agony to open her eyes or react to anything he was about to do.

She found enough strength to whisper, "Ren…"

Kai sneered. "If you love him that much, then I suppose it's only right…" He removed a talisman from the inside of his jacket. "…that I give you both the same treatment."

* * *

"You're staying in Japan for a while?"

"Yeah."

"…Where's Pin-Mei?"

"Do I smell food?"

Ren walked into the dining room. Plates of food were sitting on the table, and Anna, Manta, and HoroHoro were sitting around it.

Yoh came in behind him. "I don't know what's going on, but you're welcome to eat with us."

Ren made his way to his seat across from HoroHoro, careful to not sit in the place Pin-Mei had occupied the last time he was there.

Horo looked at him. "Hey, what's going on?"

Ren twitched.

"Time to eat!" Yoh cried.

Ren looked relieved and took a roll and some stew onto his plate. "You have any milk?"

"Yeah, in the kitchen. Help yourself."

He got up and walked over to the refrigerator and took a bottle and opened it. For a moment, he was reminded of when Pin-Mei had come home from Yoh's house with three bottles for him, but tried to push it from his mind. He put the bottle to his lips and began to take a sip.

Suddenly, a dark, disturbing feeling shot through his body.

Yoh and the others were still eating when they heard the sound of glass shattering on the floor. They ran in to see Ren standing in the kitchen. Glass and milk covered the floor around him. He looked as if he was still drinking, but his eyes were wide in horror, as he had just been stabbed.

Yoh tried to approach him. "Ren, are you okay? What's going on?" He didn't get a reply. Then he thought he heard a hoarse whisper. He tilted his head toward his friend. He heard it.

"Pin…Mei…"


	31. Shattered Dreams

A friend of mine who doesn't read/watch Shaman King reads this (as she does with all my fics, because she just rocks that hard), and she finally got past chapter one (hey, school is a biatch, what can I say?) and read chapter two as I worked on a computer next to her. She started asking all these questions about Ren, then finally asked to see what he looked like (I totally forgot she'd never seen him). Then she asked why he was so mad at chibi-Pin-Mei for pointing out his emblem, so I basically talked her ear off for about ten minutes about why he was so angry and how much he hated his dad, and stuff like that. Then she thought Bason was his teacher. So I had to go around finding pictures and stuff to make sure she understood. I actually enjoy explaining things to people (Within reason. Don't ask me a stupid question that no one knows the answer to, then I just get annoyed), so if any part of the story confuses you, feel free to ask in a review or a PM. I'd rather explain things than have you go on reading with a sense of "WTF?"

I ended my explanation of Ren by saying "Did I mention that he is totally awesome at math?" "Yes, Jezzy, you did. Five times." "182,621 nights equals 500 years- including leap years." "Yes, you told me." "Well, _Ren_ told _me_."

I finished rewatching the anime last night. I feel so empty inside…

**Notes: The last scene is a flashback to when they are back in Tao Castle. They're laying in bed before they fall asleep.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-One: Shattered Dreams**

* * *

Yoh took a step back and studied his friend. Then he grabbed his shoulders and shook him.

"Ren, snap out of it!"

Ren blinked, then shook his head a few times, touching his forehead.

"Ren, what happened?"

He stared into nowhere for a few moments before answering. "It's nothing. I'm fine."

Yoh looked at him doubtfully. "You said Pin-Mei's name, and she's not here, so there must be something going on-"

"Don't remind me that she's not here!" he yelled. Then he came to his senses and looked at the ground in shame. Yoh gave him a sympathetic look.

"Ren, I want to help, but I need to know what's going on."

Ren slowly nodded, his eyes not leaving the floor. They cleaned up the mess he had created, then made their way back to the dining room and sat around the table. This time, Ren sat between Yoh and HoroHoro. After a little prodding from Yoh, Ren began to recount what had happened.

"Pin-Mei is gone."

Sounds of disbelief sounded from around the table (Anna stayed emotionless). HoroHoro was the first to speak.

"Dude, what happened? You two break up or something?"

Ren kept staring at the table. "Yes…No…I don't know. I was sleeping when it happened."

"What the hell? Sleeping through a break up? How did you manage that?"

"Well, what happened before then?" Yoh asked, ignoring HoroHoro's comment.

Ren sighed. "After we arrived home, our parents announced that they were going to have a party to announce our engagement. Pin-Mei was scared that her grandmother, Fan Suo would show up, and didn't want to have it. I promised her that I wouldn't let anything bad happen.

"But Suo did show up. I have no idea how she even knew about it. But we got into a big confrontation with her. She berated Pin-Mei, and even slapped her, right in front of me. I didn't protect her. I couldn't.

"Suo uses words to control people make them think what she wants them to. She tried to convince Pin-Mei that I didn't love her, that I only wanted her so I could control her. She ran away, and when I went to follow her, Suo told me that she was going to take Pin-Mei home that night, no matter what I did. I ignored her and finally found Pin-Mei at the beach near my house. I promised her that even if she was taken far away from me, that I'd always come and find her. Then…"

He clenched his pants in his fists, which rested on his knees.

Yoh looked at him, concerned. "Then what?"

"I…I told her to go wait near my room while I went to command that Suo be thrown out…but Kai, Pin-Mei's older brother, he put a curse on me. I don't remember happened next, but Ran told me later…" He trailed off and fell silent.

"…What happened?"

Ren hid his pained eyes from his peers.

"Under that curse…I tried to rape Pin-Mei."

"WHAT?"

They stared at him. He didn't move or react.

"Ran said that when she, my father, and Pin-Mei's father got to my room after hearing Pin-Mei scream, I was on top of her, pinning her to the mattress. The dress robes that she had worn that night had been ripped wide open, her body was exposed to me. If Jun hadn't come in with Pyron when she did, I would have…"

Immature as ever, HoroHoro couldn't help giggling. "Are you SURE you don't remember anything about that?"

Ren snapped. He stood up and grabbed him, lifting him into the air with both hands and grasping the front of his shirt. His yellow eyes glared at him in rage.

"You think this is funny?" he growled at the Ainu. "You think I WANTED that?"

"I-I was just kidding!"

He pulled the boy's face close to his. "Do I LOOK like I'm in a funny mood?"

Horo shook his head furiously. Yoh grabbed Ren from behind.

"Ren, just let go of him! You'll strangle him!"

The young heir stared at the boy for a few more moments, allowing him to gag a little more.

"Don't you ever make a 'joke' like that EVER again," he warned.

Horo nodded and Ren dropped him to the floor. He sat back down and went on, as if the last two minutes hadn't happened.

"She was crying. Even though I was still held by the curse, Ran claims that I was crying too. Pin-Mei told everyone that I didn't want to do such a vile thing to her, and the fact that I was crying was proof.

"Suo did this so she would have an excuse to break the engagement. Who would allow their son to marry someone he raped? It was all so she could take Pin-Mei away from me. I was told that she refused to leave until she had En's word that I would not get any punishment of any kind."

He covered his face.

"But that's a punishment in itself. I would have rather been chained and tortured like my father wanted rather than live with the fact that even though I violated the very person I was supposed to protect with my life, she forgave me and made sure I'd be safe before she left.

"When she did leave, she left her clips, a rose ring I gave her, and her engagement ring in my hand. There was also a note. It told me to keep my promise to her, to go and find her, and bring her back."

He slammed his fist on the table.

"I don't even know where the hell she is!" he yelled. "I don't know where she lives! My parents won't tell me, and there's no other way for me to find out!"

He replaced his fist with his elbow and put his forehead in his hand.

"I have no way of knowing if she's alright, if she's healthy, if she's happy or sad, if she's in pain…I don't even know if she's still alive! That feeling I got just now told me that something's happened to her…and I can't do a fucking thing about it!"

He lightly yanked his bangs. His face bore an exasperated expression. Yoh gently put his hand on his shoulder.

"Ren, I have no doubt in my mind that she's alive. If you really have a bond with her that lets you know if something's happened to her, don't you think you'd know if she died? Besides, her parents will take care of her, won't they?"

Ren was about to correct him and say that she only had a father, but he was too tired and apathetic to do so.

"Everything will be all right. You'll find her."

"Yeah…"

"Bocchama…" The spirit sat in the corner next to Amidamaru.

"It's alright. I just hope that bitch Suo hasn't laid a hand on her…but that's just wishful thinking."

"Bocchama!"

Ren was slightly annoyed. "What is it, Bas-,"

He stopped. That voice wasn't Bason's.

"Ren-Bocchama!" the voice came again.

Ren looked behind him. Ma Ying was floating in the doorway. Feelings of happiness, astonishment, guilt, and hope were flooding through him all at once.

"Who's that?" Manta asked pointing at her.

"It's Ma Ying- Pin-Mei's main spirit…" Ren replied slowly. He studied her. "What are you-?"

"Please save Lady Pin-Mei!" she suddenly cried.

"What…?"

"Mistress Suo and Master Kai are holding her captive!"

Yoh tried to calm her down. "Hold it, slow down. Maybe you should tell us what happened, from the beginning."

She nodded. "Yes, I apologize."

She took a moment to gather her thoughts, then spoke.

"Lord Zhang was sending Lady Pin-Mei back to Tao Castle with her handmaids to protect her. An army of Kyonshii appeared, and the mistress decided to deal with them so they could move on without any more burdens.

"They were able to dispose of them, but then Master Kai appeared. He quickly took down all three of her guards, leaving only her. Using myself as an oversoul along with her mother's cherished sword, Minbouken, she attacked him, but was just no match. She was soon on the ground, bleeding profusely. Master Kai picked her up and took her back to the castle."

She bowed her head. "Please forgive me, Ren-Bocchama, I was not able to protect her."

Ren wasn't paying attention at that point. He was just staring into space with that same expression he'd had in the kitchen.

"She called out for you, Master Ren…I know that you are the only one who can save her."

Ren's fist showed signs of bleeding. He had been clenching it so hard that his nails had dug into his palms. His body became heated with an anger he could barely control. He finally looked up at her.

"You'll show me where she is?"

"Y-Yes of course!" she cried, smiling with hope in her eyes.

He stood up. "Bason."

"Yes, Bocchama!"

"We're going to make a stop at home, then we're going to save Pin-Mei."

Yoh stood up behind him. "How can you be sure that this isn't a trap?"

Ren glared back at him. "At this point, I couldn't give a fuck if I wanted to. I'm going to save the thing that's caused me to be so lonely for the past month. Trap or not. I'll kill whoever I have to at this point."

"Ren…"

Ren turned back around and walked out. Yoh suddenly reached out to him.

"Ren, you promise you'll call us if you need help?"

Ren gripped the door frame. "If it'll let me leave, then fine, I promise."

He broke out into a sprint as he made his way to the airport to get on his jet. All he could see was Pin-Mei's face and everything they had done together.

_That bastard…_

He thought of how he had taught her to use the Kwan Dao.

_I'll kill you for taking her away from me…_

He thought of that brief moment he had seen her before being knocked out.

"_I forgive you."_

He winced.

_Once I get her back, I'll never let her out of my sight again._

* * *

"_Ren, what do you want most?"_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_What's one of the things you want most in the world. Like, if you could have anything."_

_He hadn't given it much thought. "Well, I guess a giant refrigerator of milk would be great. No. Three of them. Perfect." He smiled to himself thinking about it. She giggled. He looked at her. "What do you want?"_

_She blushed. "Promise you won't think I'm weird?"_

"_Of course."_

"_Umm…I really want twins."_

"_Twin what?"_

"_Twins. Like…baby twins…I want a boy and a girl…I want the boy to be just like you…I even kinda want to give him your name…and um…stuff…" She trailed off, her face turning red. He looked into her eyes._

"_That's the thing you want most?" She gave a shy nod. He smiled. "I can't promise twins…that's beyond my control. But if you want a couple little brats, then I suppose I can help with that." He squeezed her. "But not now. I want to have you all to myself for a while."_

_She smiled. "I can't wait until that day that I get to be yours."_

_He brushed back her hair, giving a small smile. _

'_I don't her to have kids so quickly,' he thought. '…I'm afraid of losing her… like Zhang lost Hua…'_


	32. Hidden Motives

I had a hard time starting this chapter. I don't know why. I'm just trying to make sure Ren isn't more concerned about his battle attire than saving Pin-Mei. But he also needs some cool duds. Bling bling yo! –awful picture in mind- Ren, you are never going to wear street clothes. Ever. –is still thinking about a diamond encrusted Kwan Dao-

I wanted to have Ren go to the stables to mount Hakuoh, but then find him slaughtered instead. Then I realized that he'd have to be a huge idiot not to notice a slaughtered horse for a month. Thus, Hakuoh lived to oversoul another day.

I call Pin-Mei's house a castle because Fan Castle is an actual place. Or was. It was in Dynasty Warriors at least –sweat drop-

**Disclaimer: I don't own the book _Where the Red Fern Grows_, or Shaman King for that matter.**

**Notes: The flashback is to when they're chibitized…I mean little kids**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Two: Hidden Motives**

* * *

Ren threw his bedroom door open and ran over to his wardrobe, opening it in the same fashion. He began tossing clothes out like mad until he found his old yellow and black battle garb with the hole in the chest. Luckily, it had recently been resewed in order to accommodate his growth, so it was an easy fit. He went back and forth as to whether he needed his cape or not, but ultimately decided against it; he was going to the Xu/Fan Castle to rescue Pin-Mei, not show off his expensive clothes.

Next he ran out to the armory to make sure he had his best Kwan Dao at his disposal. He soon realized that his best one was covered in club photo stickers.

_How ironic._

He was about to go to the stables to get Hakuoh when he suddenly thought of the engagement ring that was in his drawer. Although it would cost him precious time, he decided that it was necessary to bring it.

_I want to give it back to her as soon as I can._

As he picked up the trinket, a low voice came from behind him.

"You're going after her, I see."

Ren tensed, then turned around. Xu Zhang stood in front of his wardrobe on the opposite side of the room. Looking closer, he could see that his figure was slightly transparent. He knew that the man before him was dead.

"Yes, I am."

The man looked at him sadly. "Ren, believe me when I say that although I wish for happiness for you and Pin-Mei, Fate may deal you another hand. A bad one."

"What do you mean?"

"It can be a cruel thing, Fate. I'm sure you know that."

"I do."

"Are you prepared for a life or death choice?"

"What?"

"You'll have to make a choice while you are fighting this battle. It will affect not only you, but Pin-Mei as well. But you will have to make this decision on your own. No one can help you, especially not Pin-Mei. It will not be easy for you."

Ren narrowed his eyes. "A decision about what?"

Zhang just looked away from him. "Are you prepared to kill her?"

His eyes widened. "What?"

"Are you prepared to kill Pin-Mei?"

"Why…are you even asking me this?"

"Because it may come to that."

Ren looked at the floor and put the ring on the inside of his shirt. "No, I'm not." He looked up at him. "But it doesn't matter, because I won't have to. Even if it's something I have to do, I'll find a way around it. I refuse to hurt her again. If one of us has to die, it'll be me." He turned to walk out of the room.

"Have you ever read that old American book, _Where the Red Fern Grows_?"

Ren stopped, then turned back around, confused. "What?"

Zhang ignored his expression. "It's one of Pin-Mei's favorites. Rong used to read it to her all the time. It was about a boy who bought two dogs so he could go hunting, a boy and a girl; Old Dan and Little Ann."

Ren nodded slowly just to let him know he was listening, although he didn't think it had anything to do with their present situation. The spirit seemed amused by his perplexed expression and continued.

"As the two dogs grew up, they became a formidable team…However, in the end, they get into a fight with a mountain lion. Little Ann gets cut in the shoulder, and when Old Dan joins the fight to save her and their master, he sustains wounds that lead to his demise."

He paused for a moment.

"But that is not the only tragedy. After the death of her beloved partner, Little Ann loses the will to live, and dies shortly after."

He gave Ren time to think about it. "Do you understand?"

Ren nodded. "I believe so."

"Do not go in there saying that you will sacrifice yourself in order to avoid killing Pin-Mei. While men can often times carry on, women sometimes would rather join their lovers in death than live alone until they find a new love. So if you die, remember that you will, in essence, be killing her." He looked up at the ceiling. "In reality, you are the only "family" that she has left. I am gone, as are Rong, Ling, and Shu. I alerted your parents about them, but with their wounds, it is doubtful that they'll survive." He looked at him. "People with nothing left will have no trouble taking their own lives. So don't let yourself die."

Ren nodded. "I won't." He turned. "I'm leaving now, whether you have something else to say or not. There's someone who needs me right now." Without waiting for a reply, he left the room.

Zhang watched the door slam shut.

"Do you really think they'll be all right?" he said aloud.

There was no reply.

* * *

Ma Ying and Bason were waiting for him by the gates. He trotted up to them and looked to Ma Ying.

"Lead the way," he said.

"Yes, Ren-Bocchama!" she floated off in the direction towards the Xu/Fan castle, and he followed.

_Just hang on until I get there, Pin-Mei. I'll save you._

* * *

"_Bocchama, forgive my ignorance, but what are we doing?"_

_It was late at night, and Ren and Bason were walking through a graveyard near his home. He looked over some gravestones, checking the names and dates._

"_I'm getting that brat a spirit so she'll leave me alone," he said. "I just need to find any old female spirit, then I can finally have some peace and quiet."_

_He approached one memorial and read the name. "Ma Ying Taphan. Yeah, this'll do. Spirit, show yourself!"_

_The female soldier's spirit appeared over her grave. She looked at him with slight annoyance. "Yes? What business do you have with me?"_

_He removed a small mortuary tablet from his pocket. "You're going to become a little brat's main spirit."_

_She frowned. "I apologize, but I do not wish to participate in this."_

_The young shaman raised the tablet in the air. "It wasn't a request," he said. It glowed and sucked Ma Ying in. He lowered it and sighed. "Finally. Now that that's done, I'm going to bed. Starting tomorrow, I won't have to worry about being disturbed during training."_

_The next morning, he tossed the tablet at his little shadow. She stumbled and caught it, then looked it over._

"_What's this?" she asked, holding it up._

_He groaned. "Don't you know anything? I got you a spirit just like you wanted. Now you can go train and leave me alone."_

_Her face lit up. She ran and hugged him. "Thank you, Niisama!"_

_He pushed her away. "Yeah, whatever. Just don't bother me anymore."_

_Ren went to train with Bason while Pin-Mei sat on her usual rock. She placed the tablet beside her and stared at it. Nothing was happening._

"_Niisama!" she called over._

"_What do you want?" he yelled._

"_It's not coming out!"_

"_Just tell it to come out. Gods, do I have to do EVERYTHING?"_

_She blinked at it, then poked it gently. "You can come out now." Pin-Mei smiled in awe as her new spirit emerged and floated next to her. "Hi! I'm Pin-Mei!" she cried raising her hand._

_Ma Ying looked at her, confused. "Ma Ying…" she said slowly. She looked around. "Where am I?"_

_Her master giggled. "At Niisama's house!"_

"_Who?"_

"_Niisama! Tao Ren!"_

_Ma Ying's eyes narrowed. "Tao, you say…"_

"_Uh-huh!"_

_She looked to the young boy practicing Kwan Dao movements about twenty feet away. Her look turned into a glare of anger, pain, and malice._

"_Kiet…I'll avenge your death."_

* * *

It was later the next night in the Asakura home. After a day of chores (Yoh and HoroHoro) and television (Anna), they were finally able to sit and have a nice evening meal.

"I wonder how Ren is making out," Yoh wondered aloud.

HoroHoro took a bite of food. "He's fine. You know him. He wouldn't ask for help even if he needed it."

Anna sat calmly across from them. "It was a nice visit we had from that spirit," she said after a sip of her drink.

They looked at her.

"It's too bad we couldn't have met her when Pin-Mei came over."

The boys kept staring at her. This wasn't like Anna at all.

"Come to think of it, if she didn't come here when Ren and Pin-Mei did, how did she find her way here? I doubt that if Pin-Mei was barely conscious she could tell her how to get here. Hm…how did she even know Ren was here? Wouldn't she have just sent her to his house?"

The boys thought about her words. Yoh's eyes widened.

"Ren's in trouble!"


	33. Die Die My Darling

I had neglected to mention to the friend I gave the whole Ren Lecture to that Ren isn't the "main" main character of Shaman King. I whipped out volume 8 which has Yoh on the cover and she was like "who's that?" "Oh, that's Yoh. He's the main character." "What? I thought Ren was the main character!" "He is. He's **A** main character. Yoh is **the** main character. You know, the guy that takes all the bloody credit for beating the bad guy in the end." (Yeah, you PAY ATTENTION to how much damage Ren takes as opposed to Yoh during the battle with Hao. Ren is most obviously stronger.) "Woah…I thought that by the way you were talking about Ren that he was **the **main character. So what does he do then?" "He basically goes around being all 'I can pwnt you all because even though the anime hints that I'm weaker than Yoh, I can so totally kick his ass in the manga. Not that I can't in the anime too. I basically do. Check episode 58. Biatch.'" "…I see."

So yeah. I love infecting people. And talking about things I know about. I also like cookie dough, taller men who aren't younger than me, nerds and silent types, and long walks on the beach. Call me –winks and blows kiss-

This chapter was kinda iffy. I use some scenes from the manga/anime, which I'm sometimes just feeling "eh" about. Whatever. It's one chapter. Then we'll see how much progress Ren and Yoh are making.

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Three: Die Die My Darling**

* * *

"**NO! STOP IT! DON'T TOUCH ME! IT'S NOT YOURS! MY BODY ISN'T YOURS! JUST STOP TOUCHING ME! STOP IT! JUST STOP IT AND GET AWAY FROM ME!"**

Screams like this could be heard echoing inside the Xu-Fan Castle. Pin-Mei, her wrists chained with her arms spread on either side of her, continued to cry out with closed eyes and a flood of tears falling down her face. Blood ran down her arms from her constant struggling against the iron restraints.

"Oh Mother," Kai said in faux concern, "don't you think Pin-Mei has had enough? She's screaming in her sleep."

"Maybe you're right," Suo said in the same fashion. "The poor dear."

She looked over at her granddaughter. Pin-Mei's wounds had healed and she had been dressed in her mother's battle garb- a black orient halter, bracers on her wrists, a long black skirt with slits up the side, and black pants underneath. Her body twitched and her face was creased with agony as she tried yet again to free herself from the nightmare she had been thrust into.

Kai looked also, genuinely interested. "What is she dreaming about?"

"Many things…" Suo studied the tormented face before her. "Right now I'd say she's reliving her last night with that Tao boy…with a few changes I put in." She sneered.

He faked a look of shock. "Mother! You didn't!"

She laughed. "I would have never imagined how valuable that boy would be to us. Pin-Mei's fragile spirit and naïve heart will soon be broken – shattered into a million pieces. So broken that she will be an empty shell. She'll barely have a soul. It will be the perfect opportunity to fill that shell with another spirit, and it's all thanks to him. Without even knowing it, he's destroyed her. His past alone is going to crush her."

Pin-Mei screamed again before her body went limp. Her breathing staggered, and her eyes were wide open and staring at the ground. Sweat ran down her face as they wandered about the room, as if possessed by paranoia. Suo walked over and touched her cheek. She flinched.

"Oh my darling…my poor little girl…you were having a nightmare about that night again. Those horrible memories won't leave you alone, will they? I'll never forgive that wretched boy for defiling you," she said in a soothing voice.

A few more tears fell from Pin-Mei's eyes. "But…he…he didn't…he didn't do it…Jun came in…he didn't even get to start…I…I'm still clean…I'm still clean…"

Her grandmother shook her head sadly. "It's only natural that your mind is trying to block that awful incident from your memory. When we found you, my dear child, he'd thrown you out into the rain, left you to die. Your whole body was swollen and bleeding, child. He had his fun with you, and when he was bored, he decided to get rid of you. If we hadn't found you…" She fake-cried into her sleeve. Pin-Mei looked at her with her now large and hollow eyes.

"Grandmother…"

Suo finished her act and touched her face again. "Rest now, dear. Your body still hasn't recovered. We have to prepare for the aftermath of his actions."

She placed a tag on her forehead and whispered a word into her ear. Pin-Mei's eyes closed again, another nightmare spell being put into effect.

Kai smirked. "You're sending her to meet with his past self, aren't you?"

She gave a malicious smile. "Clever boy."

"Will he notice her?"

"She has to call out to him by name five times. The fifth time she calls out to him, he'll become aware of her and react as his past self would." She opened her fan and attempted to stifle a laugh. "This is what will make her snap. Once she experiences all the pain and bloodshed he caused, she'll have no choice but to denounce her love for the scion of Tao. Then everything will be ready."

* * *

_Pin-Mei opened her eyes and looked down at herself. She felt different. Her body seemed smaller. She touched her chest._

'_Even less than I had before…if that was even possible.'_

_One of her long ponytails came in front of her. 'This is supposed to be braided…I haven't worn my hair like this since…I was eleven…'_

_She heard the honking of a car horn and looked to her left. Her eyes widened._

_She looked just in time to see a short boy use his Kwan Dao to slice the car into two equal halves. They exploded behind him. The three-quarter length pants she wore allowed the heat of the fire to burn on her skin. Despite the heat, she was frozen._

_A shiver went up her spine as she watched him turn to the driver of the car and get ready to kill him. Foolishly, she started running toward the scene._

'_There must be some sort of mistake…Ren wouldn't do this…'_

_She skidded to a stop when she saw Yoh grab the end of the boy's weapon. She smiled. 'Yeah, Yoh will talk some sense into him.'_

_But she watched in horror as they soon fought and Ren nearly sliced his arm off. She could do nothing but fall to the ground and watch. It was only some time later that she realized she was shaking._

"_Ren! Why are you doing this? Isn't Yoh your friend?" she called out in earnest._

_He didn't seem to hear her; he was occupied with wiping the blood off of his face. She looked down at the ground, lost in both thought and heart. Nothing was making sense to her._

"_Have I been sent back in time? Is that why they're fighting?" She looked down at herself again. "And why I have even less boobs than usual?" She sighed, then looked up again. "I don't know why I'm here or what I'm supposed to be doing, since they can't hear me, but I guess I'm stuck here for the time being. I mean…I shouldn't get too worked up, right? This is all in the past, so nothing bad is going to happen to them."_

_No sooner had she spoken was Ren hit by Amidamaru's attack. He hit the ground, his clothes torn, and now his own blood on him instead of Yoh's. She stood up immediately and ran to him._

"_Ren! Wake up!" she cried as she went to nudge him. Her hand went right through him. "But he'll die if I don't do something!"_

_Before she could come up with an idea, everything went black, as if the lights had been shut off. When they were turned on again, she found herself in hotel. She blinked._

"_Why would I be here? At least put me in a place where I know people, sheesh."_

_She jumped as she heard glass shatter on the floor._

"_Jun! I'm out of the bath! I need a towel! AND WHERE'S MY MILK?"_

_She nodded, acknowledging that she was at fault. "Yup, I know that."_

_Without thinking about what he had just said, she turned to walk into the bathroom. She froze, stared involuntarily for a few seconds, then left again to hide somewhere (not that he could see her anyway). In another room, she sat down and tried to stop acting like a giggling schoolgirl. _

"_Okay, just calm down. There's nothing odd about what you just saw. Nothing at all. Fact of life." She thought about it again, and blushed, hiding her face in her hands. "Naked boys are a part of life. Nothing wrong. Absolutely, positively, one hundred percent, perfectly normal." She kept repeating similar statements until she had gathered herself enough to stand up and walk back toward the room._

_When she was about to look into the room, Ren exited it, walking through her. As his body touched hers, she felt an icy pain. It left when he was away from her._

"_What was that?" she said shivering. "It was so cold…Hey Ren! Are you cold? Maybe you should put a coat on or something."_

_Again he ignored her. She followed him and watched as he sat in a throne-like chair. She squinted at his back._

"_It's still there…" she whispered, referring to his emblem._

_While she was lost in thought, Ren and Bason had been carrying on a conversation. Pin-Mei snapped back to attention at his next sentence._

"_I hate my family…I was born to exact **their **vengeance. But "revenge and restoration" will only beget more hatred, and the cycle of bloodshed will continue forever."_

_She sat down on the floor in front of his chair. "That was deep, Niisama." She figured she could call him that since it was before he had told her use his name. "He always was good at making speeches and things like that." She gave a little giggle and a blush as she watched him put on his shirt._

"_But I will put an end to the cycle of hatred…Even if I have to destroy the Tao family to do it."_

_Pin-Mei, who had been rocking back and forth in a cross-legged position, froze. She wanted to rewind and play that last sentence back. Kill his family? He wouldn't do that…He loved his sister, and she was included in that. She determined that he was just having a "day" and that he didn't mean it. At least…that's what she kept telling herself._

_It went black again. When she could see once more, she was back outside. It was nighttime, and the moon hung over what seemed to be a park. Pin-Mei looked around and spotted a vending machine. She hopped over to it. _

"_This is the hot cocoa machine!" she said excitedly. Then she heard a yell of agony and turned around._

_By the light of the moon, she could see Ren standing over the body of a Shaman Fight competitor. It was chopped up, almost seemingly empty of blood. With wide eyes she slowly walked over to him. As she got closer, she could hear his laughter and his little murmurings to himself._

"_AH HAHAHA HAH! What a laugh that you even believed that you would stand a chance against me! This is what you get for going up against the future Shaman King!"_

_She just stared at him. He was covered in blood again. At least when he fought the syndicate, he didn't seem to be enjoying himself. Right now, it was almost as if this was all a game, that the person he just killed was fake and meaningless instead of innocent and undeserving of such a gruesome fate.  
_

"_Ren…You obviously won…why did you have to go so far as to mutilate the body?" she whispered, still aware that he couldn't hear her._

_After another laugh, he raised his Kwan Dao again. Scared, but still having enough courage to know she had to stop this senseless act, she sprinted over to him._

"_Ren! Stop it! That's enough!" she cried wrapping her arms around him, her head on his chest._

_There was a flash of light. Ren stopped and looked down at her, then harshly pushed her away._

"_Who the hell do you think you are, touching me?" he yelled at her with a disgusted look on his face. "A vermin like you shouldn't even have the right to look at me, let alone touch me!"_

_She just blinked at him. "You can see me?"_

"_What did you think you were invisible or something? YES I CAN SEE YOU."_

_She looked momentarily pleased, then remembered what was going on. Rather timidly, she stepped in front of the bloody body. She was visibly shaking._

"_No more. Just stop and go home. He's…" she looked behind her. "He's dead, alright?" She turned back to him. "Ren, isn't that enough?"_

_He laughed. "You expect me to follow the orders of a complete stranger? How do you even know me anyhow?"_

_She looked at the ground. She couldn't tell him the truth. He'd never believe her._

"_I…I…"_

_She couldn't come up with anything plausible. _

"_I…I just do, okay?"_

_He frowned at her. "Hmph. Impudent bitch." He noticed her ever-visible shaking, which had gotten worse when she had looked back at the body. He smirked. "Scared, little girl?"_

_After a moment of hesitation, she gave a slight nod. "I…I'm afraid of blood…"_

"_Oh I see…well then maybe you should close your eyes so you don't have to look at it."_

"_What?"_

_She blinked and he thrust the blade into her chest. Looking down, she could see the blood starting to pour out. She could swear she felt the pain. Whether it was from being impaled or of a broken heart, she didn't know._

_The last thing she saw before things went hazy and finally black was the malicious smile on the face of Tao Ren._

* * *

Suo and Kai turned as they heard Pin-Mei begin to choke behind them. The chains had been rattling due to her shaking for the last five minutes. Her grandmother raised her eyebrows with an apathetic expression as her granddaughter began coughing up blood.

Kai walked over to the chained maiden and wiped a bit of blood off her chin with his fingers, licking them. He looked back at his mother.

"I'd say Pin-Mei is ready for a little revenge."


	34. First Loves

I recently went back to look at the meanings of the names I chose for all the OCs in this story. I remember wanting to chose a name for the female protagonist that complimented Ren's "benevolence, edge of a knife, tough", and somehow chose Pin-Mei, "high morals." Kinda missed the mark, ne? Ah well. It was either that or one with an X in it, and I wanted to keep it simple. Then I realized I should have been comparing it to "Lian" and not "Ren", and now none of it matters.

"Hua" was just a random name. I was like "oh, that's pretty," and chose it, which is unusual, because I always want to choose names that fit the character well. A great example of this is "Fan Suo". To the best of my knowledge, Suo isn't an actual name. However, Fan is a real surname meaning cage/fence. Suo in the third tone means "to lock (up)". So, Suo cages Pin-Mei, and locks her up and controls her. I'm so clever. Kai…is just Kai…and my favorite character from Beyblade when I used to watch it. Actually it means "victorious", since I was originally planning to have Kai be a good guy.

Good news. I finally drew a picture of Pin-Mei, and it turned out pretty well if I do say so myself (or at least that's what people tell me). Bad news. Since my comp has a virus, I don't have a lot of ways of getting it online. –sighs- I'll figure something out

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Four: First Loves**

* * *

"Oi! Anyone home? C'mon! Open up!"

Yoh and HoroHoro pounded desperately on the door of Tao Castle as Anna and Manta stood back and watched. Finally, Jun answered.

"Yes? What is it? What are you all doing here?"

"Where's Ren?" the boys cried.

She looked at them quizzically. "Up in his room or out training most likely. Why?"

"We _really need_ to talk to him!"

Another questioning look. "All right. I suppose you can come in," she said and led them inside.

But when they searched the house, he was nowhere to be found. Jun looked around frantically.

"Ren! Ren, where are you?"

"He's not here."

The group turned to see a tall girl with red hair coming out of the shadows, her waist and torso heavily bandaged under a thin plate of armor.

"Master Ren left a half day or so ago. He's going after Lady Pin-Mei." She looked Yoh's group over for a few moments. "You must be those friends from Japan Lady Pin-Mei spoke of."

"Hehehe, yeah, that's us!" Yoh replied with a smile. The girl didn't return the gesture.

"If you're planning on going to help Lady Pin-Mei, then hurry up and get a horse – and you better know how to ride one because I don't have the time nor the patience to teach you. I'm going to Xu/Fan Castle. Dawdle and I'll leave you behind. Lady Pin-Mei is in grave danger, and Ren alone will only make the situation worse."

Jun looked slightly worried. "What do you mean?"

"I mean Suo and Kai are using them and their feelings to their advantage and carry out a plan that was devised nearly the moment after Lady Pin-Mei was born. The rape alone proves that their plan is working."

She stared at her. "They did that? That was them? I…I doubted him…I thought it was his decision…I can't believe it…"

The red head tightened some bandages on her wrists. "I hate to be frank at a time like this, but rescuing Master Ren isn't on my priority list. I only care about Lady Pin-Mei's safety." She looked at them. "Tao Ren is your responsibility if you decide to come, not mine." She began walking towards the door.

HoroHoro got in her way. "Hey, lady, where do you get off acting like a bitch at a time like this? Sure Ren is a jerk sometimes but he deserves to be saved just as much as Pin-Mei! Why not save them both?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I live only for Lady Pin-Mei. No one else matters to me as much as she does."

"What?"

"The only reason I exist is to protect her. I have guarded her since she was born, and I will be put to death when she dies, just as my sister was."

Yoh's eyes widened. "Put to death?"

"That's right. The girls in my family are assigned to protect a member of the Fan family as they are born. When that person dies, the guard dies also. With that person dead, they have no other reason to live." She clenched a fist at her side. "I'm going because protecting her is my duty and my joy. I will never forgive myself if she dies, but I request a slow painful death if I stay and she dies without me even trying."

"How sad," Yoh said. "So let's go save them both." He smiled.

She scoffed at him. "Like I said, I'm only going to protect Pin-Mei. She would be better off if he doesn't come out of this alive."

Jun was horrified. "How can you say that?"

"Face it. All that he has caused her is pain. All she did for a whole month was cry and she barely ate anything. He did that to her, and I'll never forgive him for it."

SLAP!

Everyone looked at the girl, whose left cheek was burning red. Her eyes were wide, and she touched it before looking forward again to meet the eyes of Anna.

"Jealousy is such an ugly thing, especially when it's so visible."

She clenched a fist angrily. "Shut up!"

Anna's eyes narrowed. "Rong is it? Pin-Mei mentioned you on several occasions. You come from the Wei family, who has served the Fan family for centuries. The women are trained since birth to have undying devotion for the one that is born and assigned to them. But I feel that your feelings go farther than simple devotion to protect her."

"How would you know?" Rong yelled at her.

"You hate Ren because you protected Pin-Mei since she was born, and she looks at you as a friend, but then Ren appears and she instantly shows her feelings for him. He starts to get all the attention that you were used to getting. Now he's the one protecting her and not you. You hate the thought of losing her to him. You feel that she doesn't have any room in her heart for you anymore. Somehow you think she'd forget that you protected her when the kids in town harassed her, that you were there when Suo abused her and her father was too lost in sorrow and other women to notice her. How foolish. You're hoping that if he dies that Pin-Mei will search for comfort in you and fall in love with you instead."

Rong just stared at her. Anna's gaze didn't waver.

"If you really loved her at all, you'd realize that it's a cruel thing to let her be unhappy just so you can potentially benefit in the end. You'd be happy for them, instead of being so selfish." She turned to go back to Yoh and the others, then turned. "Pin-Mei once said she wouldn't tell Ren she loved him until she was mature enough, until she could show him that she did with all her heart. I think maybe you should follow her example."

Rong stared at the floor. There was silence as she digested the itako's words.

"What are you doing? You have to lead us to the castle so hurry up," Anna called.

Rong looked up, her eyes full of shame, but then put on a face of strong resolve and nodded.

"Get a horse everyone. We have some lovebirds to save."

* * *

"There it is. This is Xu/Fan castle - where Lady Pin-Mei is being held."

Ren looked up at the massive building. This was what he had been waiting a month for. It was his chance to get revenge on the two people who had caused so much pain, who had separated him from the one he loved. This was going to end. Now.

"All right, I'm going in. Come on, Bason." He dismounted and started walking toward the massive front doors.

"Yes, Bocchama!"

Ren placed his hand on the door and with one forceful push, blasted it open. The room he entered was dark with only a chandelier in the center to light it. Every step he took echoed throughout it. He was constantly turning around to make sure nothing was behind him. Suddenly, he heard a cackle. He turned to see Suo standing in a spot of light near the stairs. She had a menacing grin on her face.

"You know, it's very rude for a guest to let himself in."

Ren readied his Kwan Dao. "Screw manners. Tell me where Pin-Mei is!"

She smiled again. "On the bottom floor."

"Then move. Now." He gritted his teeth.

Suo shook her head. "Such anger, Tao Ren. You're not any better than your father. How could I ever give Pin-Mei to you with an attitude like that?"

"I said MOVE!"

She sighed. "I suppose the only way to make you understand is to show you the truth."

She opened her fan. Three small parchments were attached to it. Ren could see the characters for "Dream", "Death", and "Pain" on them. He braced himself for her assault. Suo waved the fan in a circle, causing the parchments to glow.

"ZHUI DAO!" she cried and pulled back to swing it at him.

The room went completely black. He looked around. Nothing but darkness.

He closed his eyes as a blinding light flashed. When he opened them, he was standing in a courtyard. The sun was shining and birds sang as they flew past large, beautiful flowers.

A small child with red hair ran past him, his hands cupped and tears in his eyes. Ren watched him as he ran to a bench where a girl, who looked to be about ten, sat reading.

"Neesama!"

The girl looked up from her book as he approached her.

"What is it, Kai?"

Kai held his hands out and opened them. Ren walked over and could see a small bird in them.

"Neesama, I found this bird on the ground… please save it!"

His sister tilted her head, then took the bird in her hands. "Well, I'll see what I can do."

She cupped it and closed her eyes. Her hands glowed for a moment, and as she opened her eyes, she opened her hands and the bird took off into the sky. They watched as it flew out of sight. Kai smiled and looked at his sister.

"You're so amazing, Hua! How did you do that?"

She giggled. "Thanks. But it's really simple. All I did was use some of my furyoku to give its heart enough strength to keep beating. It should be fine now."

The spirit of a flower guardian appeared next to her. She wore a pink dress and had pink curly hair. Her skin was chalk white. "But Mistress, it really was amazing! You can bring life to dying creatures! Think of all the lives you could save with this ability!"

Hua shook her head. "As I am now, I can only save small things," she said looking at her hands. "If Kai were in the same situation, I would not be able to save him. My furyoku alone would not be enough."

Kai looked at the ground. She put her hand on his head.

"But don't worry, I'd find a way to save you. You're my only brother, after all. For now, I'm going to get as strong as I can so I will be able to use this power to save people someday." She smiled.

They vanished and the sky suddenly darkened. A few drops of rain fell. Then a few more. Steadily, the volume of rain grew until it was pouring. Large puddles formed and the water rose until was at the stairs of the house.

The scenery changed to that of a village. People appeared at a nearby stone wall. It must have been at least twenty or thirty feet high. The men pushed against it with all their strength.

"All the sand bags are wet!"

"It won't hold much longer!"

"We have to hold on!"

"If we let the water get through, countless people will die!"

"Stand firm, men! Stand firm!"

The group surrounding the wall parted as a small cloaked figure made its way to the front. Even the men holding the wall stopped to look. Hua flipped down the hood to reveal her face.

"I'll take it from here."

A man who seemed to be in charge of the group approached her. "You're one of those shamans, aren't you?"

She nodded. "Yes, I am."

He chuckled. "Heh. I know about you shamans, your ability to heal and control the weather. You think you're so much better than all of us."

Hua shook her head. "That is not true. We're regular people just like you. Hardly any of us can heal or control weather anymore. That ability was somehow lost over the course of history."

"Yeah, whatever! The point is, you caused this flood, now you've come to "save us" so you can get some glory and control us by reminding us how we owe you our lives. You can't fool me, you little witch!"

She stood firm. "Actually, witches and shamans are almost nothing alike. We do not use familiars, like black cats; we have spirits to aide us. Furthermore-"

The man grabbed her by the throat and raised her into the air. "Don't get saucy, girl! Don't go acting all high and mighty! I'll snap your neck, you little freak!" His hand grasped her even tighter.

A sinking feeling came over Ren. This was the backlash that shamans had begun to receive once technology developed, and their services were rendered useless and looked down upon as works of the devil. Hua had come with the intention of helping the town that had shunned her family for so many years, but they still expected the worst from her. Now she was about to be killed because of her kind heart. He knew he had to stop this.

"Hey!" he shouted as he ran up to them. "Let her go! She didn't do anything wrong!"

They ignored him. As he approached them, he went to bash into the man who was holding her. He didn't feel the impact of hitting him, but instead hit the ground. Confused, he looked up at the people around him. Standing up, he punched the man, only to watch his fist go through his head.

_There's nothing I can do…_

He watched as the man continued to strangle the young girl. Suddenly, one of the men at the wall called out to his leader.

"Sir! It won't hold much longer- five minutes at most!"

"What?" The man looked back at his team, then at Hua. He gave a disgusted look and threw her to the ground. "Do it."

She nodded slowly and got up from the muddy ground. Ren could have sworn she looked over at him, but thought it was impossible, since no one else seemed to be able to see or hear him. She walked over to the wall and placed her hands on it. Interested, Ren stood behind her and watched as she wrote the character for "wall" in the mud with her finger. She began murmuring to herself, but it was loud enough for him to hear.

"Gun…Da-Yu…I come to thee as a willing servant…Please lend me your power to drive away the evils of the demon Gong-Gong! I ask of you now – strengthen this wall and shield this town from the demon's evil intentions!"

The wall shined seemed to solidify into stone and the chunks of earth ceased falling. The civilians showed their awe at the feat that had just been performed before their very eyes. Hua looked up the wall, breathing heavily and smiling weakly. She knelt on the ground, gasping for air. A girl about fifteen years of age ran up behind her.

"Lady Hua!" She held an umbrella over her mistress's head. Hua looked up at her.

"I'm fine, Shan," she said.

All the same, her maid helped her off the ground. "Lady Hua, you know that if you overexert yourself like this that it'll only make your body weaker."

Hua kept her weak grin. "Whoops…must have forgotten."

The man stood in front of them. "How do you know it'll hold?" he growled.

Hua looked up at him, exhausted. "It should until the flood subsides."

He narrowed his eyes. "You stay here and make sure it does."

She looked at him questioningly. Shan looked at him angrily. "That's an inane request! Can't you tell she's exhausted? She used most of her furyoku repairing that wall, and you want her to remain here where she can die of pneumonia? Can't you just thank her and let her go home and rest?"

"I'm not giving you a choice. Leave her here. If the wall fails, she can pay for it with her life."

Shan was about to protest again when Hua stopped her.

"It's alright, Shan. They're right; it's my duty to maintain this wall. It wouldn't be right if we went home and it broke…" She turned to the men, still being supported by Shan. "I'll stay."

The man smirked. "Good. We weren't planning on letting you decide anyway."

Hua chuckled. _They'll never change._

Shan frantically turned to her master. "Lady Hua, you don't have enough furyoku to rebuild the wall even if it broke! Besides…" She looked about their surroundings. "You'll become gravely sick if you stay out here! Just please! We can find another way!"

Hua raised a hand to silence her. "Enough, Shan. I appreciate your concern, but I'm staying here. I've already given my word, and I can't go against it. Retire to the castle and await my return."

"My Lady, I refuse to leave you alone with these men!"

"Oh, we're going home," the man said.

Shan looked at them, bewildered. "What?"

"Why should we stay around? "Madame Shaman" has it taken care of. We're going home to our families." They started walking away. She stared at them.

"Humans are such treacherous creatures…" she muttered.

_That's exactly what I used to think_, Ren thought bowing his head. He lifted it after hearing a cry.

"Sir, wait!"

The man turned to see a young man of about eighteen standing in front of the girls. His dark brown hair was tied in a short stub of a ponytail, soaked by the rain. He had brown eyes to match. They pierced the heartless man in front of him.

"What is it, boy?"

The youth swallowed and stepped forward. "Sir, this isn't right! This girl came here to help us; we can't just leave her here alone!"

The man glared at him. "Are you saying that you care about that…that devil spawn?"

Hua and Ren both flinched.

The boy lowered the fist he had been clenching. "Well…I…I can't go home with such a guilty conscience."

The men before him laughed. The boss laughed hardest. "Alright, Zhang, you can stay and protect the girl. She's all yours." He smirked. "Have fun."

Zhang was taken aback. He looked behind him at Hua. She was staring at him in disbelief. He stared at the ground, then back at her.

Ren looked back and forth to each of them. Pin-Mei's father hadn't been a shaman…

Zhang finally walked over to her and smiled.

"Xu Zhang," he said holding out his hand to her. "Eighteen."

She blushed and stood up on her own so she could grasp his hand. "Fan Hua…" she whispered. "Twelve."


	35. My Little Flower

It's really hard to make Zhang fall in love with Hua without making him seem like a perv. I mean, we don't meet a lot of people who are in their right minds who fall in love with a little girl six years their junior. –shrugs- Well, I guess we could go into the relationship between Nadeshiko and Mr. Kinomoto in CCS, I guess that's not completely off the mark. (Why are all my analogies CLAMP ones? I don't even read CLAMP manga that often…)

**Notes: I plan on having this history lesson be a three-parter. This is part two. The next chapter will be the last part, and then we get to the bloody battles. Go blood! (I think)**

**Yen-lo-Wang is the Chinese ruler of Hell**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Five: My Little Flower**

* * *

"Miss Hua, you don't have to stand so far away from me. I'm not going to hurt you."

"No, I'm fine right here."

Zhang was standing under a small stable-like structure, while the small shaman stood almost thirty feet away from him in the rain. She wouldn't look at him and had hidden her face under her hood. He sighed and shook his head.

"Why don't you come over here with me? You won't get as wet if you sit under the shelter I made. That girl you were with earlier wanted you to stay out of the rain, so standing over there doesn't make sense."

"I…I'm fine…I can stand by myself."

"Apparently, but wouldn't you rather stand where it's drier?"

She shook her head. "I'm fine."

He sighed again and marched out to where she stood. Without saying a word, he threw the small girl over his shoulder and walked back under the shelter. He placed her down on a dry mat and draped a blanket on her shoulders. She looked up at him and blinked as he threw back her hood.

"I brought you some dry clothes," he said handing her a pair of pants and a blouse. She rubbed her fingers on the fabric. Cotton. "It may not be what you're used to, but at least you won't have to wear those wet clothes."

She blinked at him again. "Pervert."

His eyes became wide. "What?"

"You just want to see me naked. Pervert."

"No! No! That's not it!" He was telling the truth, but his reddened face didn't say that. "I just don't want you to get sick, alright?"

She smiled at him. "I know, I was kidding. I just wanted to see how you would react. You're funny." She laughed.

Zhang recovered and stared at her. After his boss had said those awful things to her after she had just helped them, she was freely laughing and teasing him, and she seemed to trust him, considering that she didn't seriously call him a pervert for giving her the clothes. He smiled at her. She continued smiling at him.

"No seriously, get out. I don't want an old person looking at me."

"What?" he practically shrieked. "I'm not old! Eighteen is NOT old!"

"Compared to me it is. I still have the capacity to be 'cute'. You don't. Boys your age are either handsome or ugly." She flipped her hands out as she considered each option.

He looked at her uneasily. "So what am I?"

She folded her arms in deep thought. "I haven't decided yet."

"So you're saying I'm ugly."

"No. I honestly haven't decided yet. I have my own fiancé to think about. I don't usually look at any men besides him." She nodded with her eyes closed, as if to affirm this statement to herself. "I'll let you know when I make my decision."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Fiancé?"

She unfolded her arms and looked at him. "That's right."

He patted her. "Oh you little kids are so cute. Playground love, eh?"

She looked up at him. "No. My parents told me he's the one I'm going to marry. We're getting married when I turn thirteen."

He stared at her. "But you're so tiny…"

She shrugged. "That's the way the cookie factory crumbles. My family needs a son to carry on, so I need to get married soon and start having 'em. No big deal."

He looked worried. "Do you know what that involves?"

"Of course I do. I lay an egg and then it'll hatch. Duh."

Zhang slapped his face with his palm. "No, not exactly."

"That's what Shan told me, and she's really smart."

Ren sweatdropped. _Why do I feel like I've been through something like this before?_ He watched as Zhang patted her and sat in the corner of the shelter.

They sat in silence for a while. The only thing that could be heard was the crackling of a small fire in the center. Zhang poked the fire with a stick every so often. When he looked up, he caught Hua staring at him. She blushed and turned her head. He raised his eyebrows at her then turned back to the fire.

"Um…are you sure your wife won't be upset that you're out here?" she asked suddenly.

"No, because she doesn't exist."

"What? My mom said almost everyone's married by the time they're eighteen."

He threw the stick into the fire. "Do you really believe everything that everyone tells you?"

"No."

"Seems like it to me."

She smiled. "When people tell me I'm Satan's child, I don't believe them. That's just silly." She laughed.

"Doesn't it hurt when they say those things?"

Her smile faded. She turned her head away from him. "Of course it does, but I can't control other people, so why worry about it? It'll just give me a headache, and I have enough problems with my body to have to worry about that." She tried to laugh again.

"But…"

"Let's talk about something happy," she said brightly. "I have a little brother his name is Kai he's 9 he's so cute when he's not being annoying but he clings to me a lot his hair's red and he refuses to cut it so I started braiding it but my mom doesn't like it I still think it looks cute but-,"

She stopped. Her eyes widened like she was a normal person who had seen a ghost. Zhang waved his hand in front of her face.

"Miss Hua? Are you in there?"

Hua didn't reply, but looked to the outside.

"Someone's going to drown…" she whispered.

"What?"

Without warning, Hua got up and ran back out into the rain. She stopped at a nearby stream and looked across it. The water level had been steadily rising, and must have been at least eight feet deep. She kept looking around until she spotted some waving hands above the water. Squinting her eyes, she could make out the body of a small child.

"What are you doing out here?" Zhang cried running over to her. He saw her shiver, cough, and then jump into the water. He skidded to a stop at the bank. "Miss Hua! What the hell are you doing?"

She didn't reply, but only floated down the stream after the child. He found the way that she was practically flapping her arms an awkward way of swimming, but couldn't make a connection yet.

As she reached the child, she held onto it for dear life, then placed it on a wide ledge above the shore. Before she could pull herself out, the wild current grabbed her and pulled her under. Now she was the one with her arms in the air.

Ren stared at her, remembering his experiences with Pin-Mei.

_She can't swim!_

He ran up beside Zhang. "What are you doing, you idiot? Go save her!" Of course, his words fell on deaf ears. He again watched helplessly as Hua was carried further and further away from them.

Zhang clenched his fists. "The little idiot! Why would she try to save that kid if she can't even save herself?" He started sprinting down the bank toward her. When he felt that he was close enough, he dove in.

The moment he hit the water he could feel the strong current try to overcome him as it did Hua. He let it carry him until he was able grab her and pulled her tightly against him. With all his strength, he fought back to the shore and carried the young girl to the safety of the shelter after making sure the child had gone back to its mother.

He laid her down by the fire and tried his best to get her warm. When there seemed to be nothing more he could do, remembering she had already used the dry set of clothes, he became frantic.

"Why did you do that you idiot?" he yelled at her. "You knew you'd just get wet again! Now everything's drenched and I can't leave you here to get anything else! If you pretend to be so smart then why don't you think things through?"

She opened her eyes and looked at him, trying to smile. "I did…I considered the options, and I chose the best one…"

"How the hell is that the best one?"

"I didn't want to have that vision come true…I didn't want that kid to die…"

"Vision?"

Her eyes closed and she began to shiver again. "I…I didn't want to know he was going to die and not even try…I didn't want to give them another reason to hate shamans…"

Zhang pounded the ground. "Is that all you could think about? What other people would think of you?"

She tried to shake her head. "I just don't want my children to live in a world where shamans are hated…I want them to have friends." She coughed as the shivering intensified. "Is that really a bad thing to want?" She began a coughing fit. His eyes widened.

"Shivering…coughing…" He put his hand on her forehead. "Fever…" He stared at her. "Pneumonia! Miss Hua! Look at what your recklessness has done!"

She attempted a smile again. "Oops…sorry…Heh heh…"

"Dammit!" He picked her up. "There's no choice, I have to take you to my family's clinic. If you start having breathing problems, things'll get really bad."

She lightly clutched his shirt. "Sorry if I'm heavy."

He shook his head, almost in disgust. "You're too light for someone your age. My mom's going to have a field day with you."

Ren watched as the scene went completely black. After a few moments, the light of a lamp appeared and soon he was in a room where three people were surrounding a small bed. He looked past them and saw Hua laying there, her eyes closed, and breathing through a small respirator that rested on a nightstand.

A middle-aged man in the room, who he presumed was Zhang's father, rummaged through the nearby medicine drawers while his wife placed a wet cloth on Hua's head. Zhang looked at them earnestly.

"Will she be all right?"

"It's still too early to tell," his father, Sun, replied without looking up. "We don't know her past medical history or why her body seems so frail. We don't know if she's allergic to any antibiotics or medicines… She's going to be difficult to treat."

His wife, Na, sighed. "Don't listen to your father, dear. He's just being dramatic. She'll be fine once she gets some rest and a little medicine."

Zhang breathed a sigh of relief. "That's good to hear."

"Still…I don't understand why she put up the wall in the first place," Na murmured.

"Why?"

"See that castle up there past the mountains?" She motioned out the window. "That's Fan Castle, where this girl lives. The flood does not affect them due to the castle being in an elevated area. She had absolutely no reason to come down here to help. So I wonder why…"

Zhang looked at the patient. "I think she's hoping that people won't hate shamans if she does enough to help them."

His mother looked down at her. "That's too much of a burden for someone her age to carry. Besides…considering who her mother is, changing the minds of the people here is nearly impossible."

"Her mother?"

She nodded. "Almost fifteen years ago, Fan Suo found her three-year-old daughter Yan slaughtered and dismembered on their front doorstep. Apparently, she was supposed to marry into an illustrious shaman family, and her death undoubtedly ruined those engagement plans. Suo flew into a rage, as any mother would, and cursed nearly a third of the town. The cursed all suffered horrible and painful deaths.

"No one could give any other explanation for the horrible and bloody disease that felled the villagers, so they concluded that it was Suo's doing. She neither admitted to nor denied the allegations, so in the eyes of villagers, she was guilty. That's when their hatred of shamans truly began. The Fan family and this town had always tried to keep to themselves, but with that tragic incident, the animosity just went to a new level." She stroked Hua's cheek. "It really is a shame. It's not this girl's fault her mother killed them."

Her son looked at her. "Mother, do you hate shamans?"

"It doesn't matter," Sun interjected. "A doctor doesn't discriminate, whether his patients be humans, witches, angels, or shamans."

The next scene Ren saw was a week later. The rain had dried up, and Hua was still with Zhang at his house. She was following him down a hall that would lead them outside.

"Where are we going?"

"We need to go feed the animals."

"You have cats?"

"No."

"Dogs?"

"A couple."

She looked at the sacks they were both carrying. "This seems like a lot of food for just a couple of dogs."

"We have a lot more than that."

"What?"

He opened the door and she saw a small farm in the backyard. A small chicken house sat to the left, while some dogs went about patrolling the cows, pigs, sheep, and horses in various pens. She dropped her sack and stared at them.

"WOW!"

Before Zhang could stop her, she ran out towards them and began looking at all the animals. She bounced from pen to pen, emitting squeals of wonder and delight. He shook his head.

"We have to feed them, you know."

She turned to him, a huge smile on her face. "I can't help it! I've never seen anything like this before! We don't have these things at my house!"

He watched her go around and pet the animals for a couple minutes, then handed her the sack she had dropped and made her get to work with helping him feed them.

"This is so much fun!" she exclaimed as she threw corn meal to the chickens.

He chuckled. "Try doing it for eighteen years, then see how much you like it."

Later on, they were walking back home from the marketplace, each with bags of food in hand. As they neared the house, a group of townspeople blocked their path. Zhang urged Hua to run home with what she had, and that he would be fine. When she was out of sight, he turned to the small mob.

"Um…can I help you all with anything?" There was a hint of fear and uneasiness in his voice.

A mother stepped forward. "How dare you allow that devil child to stay in this town!" she cried.

"She could make our children sick!"

"Or kill our families and livestock!"

"Have you sided with a daughter of demons, Xu Zhang?"

A man silenced them, then looked him in the eye. "Look Zhang, I know that girl put up that wall that kept the flood at bay, but her kind simply can't be trusted. How can we sleep at night knowing how close a descendant of Yen-lo-Wang is to us? I think it would be in the best interest of your family if you got rid of her as soon as possible."

Zhang's grip on the bags tightened. "She's not a devil, or a demon, or anything like that! She's just an innocent girl who wanted to help us when she didn't have to! You have no right to talk about her like that! My family isn't going to throw her out until she is one hundred percent better. Even then, we'll keep her as long as she wants to be with us, and there's nothing you people can say or do that will change our minds!"

The man shook his head. "Zhang, that girl will only bring you misfortune." He turned and left the group. "Proceed."

"What?"

"You heard Ping! Get him!"

Zhang braced himself for a beating, but only heard gasps. He opened his eyes and saw Hua standing in front of him. Her stance was rigid and he could see her holding something in her hands.

"…Miss Hua?"

She didn't answer, him, but instead addressed the crowd.

"Listen up, all of you. I want you to leave the Xu family alone."

Her tone of voice almost made his heart stop. It was so deep and dark, such as none he had heard before. For a moment, he almost wondered if that really was the little Hua he had been taking care of for the past week.

"Who do you think you are?" a cry came from the crowd.

"We'll kill you too if you don't watch it!"

"You're just a plague to this town."

Hua didn't flinch, but instead took some slips of paper in each of her hands, spread them out like fans and crossed her arms on her chest. "I bet you can all guess what these are."

"Curse tags! Like that bitch Suo used on our loved ones fifteen years ago!"

Hua gave a low chuckle. "That's right. And I have enough for all of you." Her face hardened again. "If you all don't want to die in pain like the others, you should leave. Now. I'm giving you ten seconds."

"We don't believe you!"

"Oh really? Try me. Ten…"

"She's bluffing!"

"Nine…"

"She wouldn't dare!"

"Eight…"

"There's no way she'd kill us after building that wall!"

"Seven…"

"She…She's crazy!"

"Six…"

"She really **IS** the devil's daughter!"

"Five…"

"She's taking even more out!"

"Four…Not much time left…Three…"

"Miss Hua! Please stop!"

"Two…"

"RUN!"

In a few seconds, the whole crowd that had surrounded them was gone. Hua stood up straight and sighed.

"Good they ran…I don't know what I was going to do if they didn't."

Zhang looked down at her sadly. "Miss Hua…why would you even think of doing something like that…you're acting just the way they are accusing you of acting…of wanting to hurt people."

She looked at the tags in her hands. "Oh these? Pfft. I couldn't hurt a fly with these. They're bookmarks."

"What?" He looked down at them to find the names of famous books and the town bookstore on the back of them.

"Uh…yeah. I can't use curse tags. Never wanted to learn how." She put her arm behind her head and laughed. "So yeah, if they didn't run, we'd be in a whole lot of trouble."

He stared at her, then dropped his bags and hugged her. She stopped.

"Hey, what is it? It's not like you to be this touchy feely."

"I was so afraid…"

"What?"

"I was so afraid that you were really like they said, that the girl I had treated like a sister for the past week wasn't the sweet, funny, and cute person I had thought her to be."

She smiled at him. "You're so silly Niisama."

He smiled back at her weakly. "I told you before, call me Zhang, not Niisama."

She giggled. "Oh right, sorry."

He stood up. "Let's just go home. My parents might be worried if you put the bags in and then ran back out."

Later that night, as they were finishing dinner, there was a knock at the door. Sun went to answer it. When he opened it, a tall man with long jet black hair stood in the doorway. His clothes were red and black and visibly expensive.

"I've come to take Fan Hua off your hands," he said gruffly.

The family turned to look at Hua, who had a sad, shocked look on her face. Zhang touched her shoulder. "Hua, who is it?"

She swallowed, not losing eye contact with the man at the door.

"Jiang Yin…my fiancé."


	36. The Flower Wilts

I promised only three parts, so this chapter is going to be hella long. There's a lot that needs to be done. –starts going down checklist – Evil fiancé; check.

I guess it should be noted that Hua is slightly taller than Pin-Mei by the time she's 14, at 5'3", and she has an actual bust line (yea, she's 12, get over it). Pin-Mei's 5'1". She'll grow, no worries. I've made Ren 5'10". Zhang is about 6'.

Yes, I did sort of change Zhang's personality. He's more brash and short-tempered. We'll just say that he has a very dynamic personality; when he's nice, he's so sweet, but when he's pissed, he's a ticking time bomb. I'm still deciding on who would be their voice actors. Believe it or not, I'm actually thinking of Miyano Mamoru for Zhang, who does Suoh Tamaki on Ouran High School Host Club. Not definite.

**Notes: Jiang Yin means "adultery/rape/seduce" in Chinese. Yes, it does have significance. **

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Six: The Flower Wilts**

* * *

Zhang stared at the stranger on his doorstep. They made eye contact, and he felt a chill run up his spine as the man's red eyes pierced through his.

_This guy's a shaman…He's like Hua…but…there's something so evil and rotten about him_. He looked to the man's fiancée. _She doesn't seem too excited to see him…Why? If they're going to get married soon, shouldn't she be throwing herself at him after not seeing him in over a week?_

Yin extended a hand to Hua. "Come, darling. It's time for us to go home. Your mother is anxiously awaiting your return."

Hua looked at the floor, but picked her head up again, a smile on her face. She ran to him and thrust her arms around him.

"Of course, dearest! I've missed you so much! Thank you for coming to get me!"

Ren looked from the couple to Zhang. Xu's expression was surprised, but had a certain sadness, and even a tinge of jealousy. He watched as the mortal walked over to them and pulled Hua back by the shoulder. Yin looked at him with an insulted and annoyed face.

"Yes, human? Can I help you?"

Hua looked up at Zhang, confused. She could feel his grip on her shoulder tighten slightly.

"If you were so worried about her, why didn't you come sooner?" he said in a challenging tone.

Yin's eyes narrowed. "What are you suggesting, Zhong?"

"It's Zhang, and I'm suggesting that if Hua really meant anything to you, you would have come here at least five days ago, not wait a whole week later."

"Things like that are none of your concern. Hua belongs to me, and when I come to rescue her from peasants is my own business."

"I'm not giving her back to you until you give me a valid reason. I won't let her go back to a man who doesn't seem to give a shit about her." His tone was intensifying, his face getting creased with anger.

"Why you-"

Yin reached into his jacket to remove a tag. Hua saw this and frantically tried to get between them.

"Yin, don't let the human get to you. He's not worth it." She seemingly glared back at Zhang. His eyes widened and he fell silent.

"Please…just let her stay one more night…" he said finally, bowing his head. "It'll give her time to gather her things."

Yin scoffed at him. "Why would I ever do something like that?"

Hua looked at Zhang sadly, then turned to Yin. "Darling, why not indulge the mortal for a night? It may assure that he will not cause trouble later on."

He looked down at her skeptically. Then he looked at Zhang, who still had his head bowed. "Very well…" He pulled her close to him, her wrist in his hand and nuzzling her in the crook of her neck. "…But you'll have to repay me." His hand slithered up and cupped her breast. She inhaled sharply, trying not to flinch.

"Yes, dear…" she said finally. Her breathing returned as his hands left her body.

"Very good, then," Yin said with a fake smile. "I'll come back for her tomorrow. Take until then to say your goodbyes. See you tomorrow, dearest." He kissed her passionately, then left. She gave a small wave with an equally fake smile.

After the door closed, there was silence in the room. Hua was still standing with her back turned to Zhang. He had picked his head up in time to see the kiss, but nothing before that.

"Well, I guess that's that," Hua said, trying to sound happy. "Let's just enjoy tonight, okay? It won't help if we're all sulking." She turned around to see Zhang staring at her. Her smile weakened. "I'm sorry I had to act like that. I didn't mean any of it…but he would have hurt you if I didn't…I'm sorry…I still shouldn't have done it…"

Zhang just kept staring at her. It made her feel uneasy. His parents looked at each other and slipped out the back door, saying something about checking the chicken coop, leaving the two of them alone.

He took a step closer to her, and she looked up at him. "What?"

He grabbed her wrist. "Let's go to bed."

Not waiting for a response, he dragged her to his room and shut the door. She stood in the middle of the room with him to her right. She stared at her folded hands, then at the floor.

"You're not leaving tomorrow," Zhang said suddenly.

She snapped her head up. "What?"

"I'm not letting you leave this house. You're staying here."

She still didn't understand. "Zhang, what are you saying? Your family's clinic will do much better once I'm gone. The townspeople won't harass you about having a she-demon in your house. Me leaving will be a good thing."

He turned around and grabbed her shoulders. "No. It won't be. I don't care what those bastards out there think. They can imprison me for treason and burn me at the fucking stake for all I care. I just…" He knelt down in front of her and looked into her beautiful blue eyes. Part of him wanted to smile, but couldn't muster the strength.

She blinked at him. "What?"

With an exasperated look in his eyes, he put his forehead on her shoulder. "Hua, think. I know you're smarter than this. Why would I want you to stay here?"

"Um…You like being around me?

"Yeah, I do, but there's more to it than that."

"…You'd be sad if I was gone?"

"Yeah, really sad, but there's still more."

She made a thinking sound. "…You'd miss me?"

"More than you know. You're almost there, one more step."

She looked at the ceiling, shook her head, and looked at the ground. "I can't think of anything else."

He picked his head up and looked into her eyes again. She blushed and tried to avoid his gaze, shaking her head once more.

"Please don't say it…"

He ignored her and turned her head back to look at him with his left hand. After admiring her once more, he couldn't contain himself any longer. He gently cradled her face in his hands, keeping her in place as he moved in and kissed her. Her eyes went wide, then closed as a tear rolled down her face. Her small hands quivered as she clung to his sleeves.

When he finally pulled away from her, he lost himself in her eyes, just so he could resist the urge to kiss her again. Despite the simple kiss he had just given her, his breathing was heavy and staggered, as was hers.

"Do you understand now, Hua?" he managed to say.

She nodded, her face cloaked in a veil of red. "You…You love me."

He smiled. "Finally. I was beginning to think you were never going to get it." He put his forehead to hers. "Yes. I love you." He quickly kissed her again before placing her on his bed. Her body became stiff as her eyes widened even more, then silently trembled. He sat at her right on the edge of the bed and leaned over her, holding her hands.

"Call me a fool, but I won't let him take you away from me. I want you with me forever. I can't stand the thought of someone like him having you. Even if you're younger than me, I can't help these feelings…I just hope you don't hate me for it."

Hua stared at the ceiling, trying to take in the events of the past five minutes. Her eyes watered and she closed them to try to make it stop.

"Hua…please…sleep with me tonight."

Her eyes opened again, and a few more tears fell. "Alright."

She sat up and got off the bed, standing where she had been before. Slowly, her back turned to him, she began unbuttoning the cotton blouse they had given her, throwing it to the floor when she was done with it. Zhang watched her skeptically, then went to his drawers and rummaged around in them.

Hua removed her pants and tossed them aside. She took her braids out from under her chin-length violet hair and undid them, allowing her hair to drape itself over her body. Finally, she reached up and took out the clip from on top of her head, the hair falling and covering her eyes. Quickly, she created a messy part in her hair to clear her vision. She sighed, then tried to cover herself with her arms as she turned to him. "Alright, I'm rea-,"

"Arms up!"

"What?" But she quickly did as she was told. A large shirt was slipped over her, undoubtedly one of Zhang's. She looked down at it, then at him.

He laughed at her. "Hua, you goofball. You forgot we weren't in your room, and that you didn't have your pajamas right where you could get them." She stared at him as he came over and patted her head. "Think next time. You're a smart girl, you know."

She stared up at him. _That wasn't what he wanted…He didn't mean the same thing that Yin always meant. He only wanted…_ She jumped and hugged him.

"Hey, woah! What is it?" He gently touched her shoulders and pushed her away so he could look at her. When he saw the tears in her eyes, he instantly became worried. "Hua? What's wrong? What is it?"

She shook her head. "Nothing…I'm just so happy…that's all…"

He smiled at her. "Come on, let's go to bed."

He wiped her tears away as they got into his bed. He threw his shirt off and held her close.

"Handsome…"

"What?"

"I've decided. You're handsome."

"Took you a week to decide that?"

"Not really. I just kept forgetting to say it."

He smirked. "Is this your way of telling me you love me?"

Her cheeks burned. "Um…well…yeah…I…guess…"

He chuckled, and they soon fell asleep.

Ren had mixed feelings as he watched them. He was happy that they loved each other, because it meant that Pin-Mei would be born soon and that they'd meet a few years after. But seeing them sleeping together reminded him of what he was missing. Her. The girl whose mother bore such a striking resemblance to. Pin-Mei.

The next night, Zhang and Hua stood together in the dining room waiting for Jiang Yin to appear. As the door flew open, his malicious smile and glowing eyes could be seen in the darkness of the night. Like the night before, he extended his hand to his fiancée.

"Come darling, we have a very busy night ahead of us."

Hua looked up at Zhang, then at Yin. Slowly, she started walking over to him. Zhang put his hand under one of her small braids as she left. It trailed over his skin, and he clenched his fist when he could feel it no more. He looked up, his eyes flared with anger.

Yin was clutching Hua again, his right hand on her right breast. Zhang went to march over to him, but Sun grabbed his arm.

"Son, don't do anything rash. You have no idea what he's capable of."

Zhang shook him off and continued on his way. Without warning, he pulled his hand back and punched Yin in the face. He pulled a shocked Hua away from him and hid her behind his back.

As Yin recovered, he glared at Zhang, who showed no fear or remorse. "What do you think you're doing?"

"I could ask you the same exact thing. What kind of pig forces himself on girl like that? And even if she wasn't against it, she's too young for that crap!

"Who are you to decide that?"

"Anyone would say that! Twelve? Are you fucking serious? Her body wasn't made for you to put your grubby hands all over, whether you're her fiancé or not. If you really loved her at all, you'd wait until she was old enough before you even thought about doing that to her. You'd appreciate the privilege of being able to touch her, you sick bastard!"

Yin raised his eyebrows. "Oh dear, Hua. How could I have ever let you stay another night in a house with such disgusting individuals in it?"

"What did you say?" Zhang took a step toward him.

Yin sighed. "I guess I have no other choice." He reached into his jacket.

Hua's eyes widened. "No Yin! Don't!"

Before anything could be done about it, Yin pulled out a tag and threw it at Zhang. It landed on his forehead and began to glow. A second later, surges of dark energy came out and engulfed his body like electricity, crippling him and forcing him to the ground. He screamed as blood came from his ears, nose, and mouth. Hua knelt beside him and tried to take the tag off, but the waves coursed through her body, and she quickly retracted her hand. She looked at it; it was smoldering, burned by the dark energy. She jumped up and grabbed Yin's arm.

"Please, Yin! Stop this! He's not worth it! Let's just go home, please! I'm sick of being here!"

"Why do you care about what happens to this trash?"

"Well…I…," she looked down at Zhang, whose body was still writhing in pain. "J-Just stop it! He'll die! Stop it!"

When he ignored her, she knelt beside the cursed boy again and braced herself. After a quick breath, she clutched his body close to hers, allowing the energy to engulf her as well. She tried to hold back cries of pain as it burned her body, but her grip never weakened. If anything, it only made her hold him tighter against her. Her actions finally caught Yin's attention.

"Hua, you fool! What do you think you're doing?" he cried.

She opened her left eye through the pain so she could look at him. "I won't let go until you release the charm."

They stared at each other, Hua giving the best glare she could manage in her state. Finally, he sighed and snapped his fingers. The tag fell to the ground, splitting in two. She breathed a sigh of relief and ran her hand across his face, then his chest, arms and hands.

"I'm so sorry…" she whispered.

Yin walked over to her and yanked her off the ground. "We're leaving – NOW." He dragged her toward the door. Zhang weakly lifted his head off the ground.

"Hua…"

She looked back at him frantically. "June 10th!" she cried. "June 10th!"

"What…?"

"It's your last chance! June 10th!"

Yin covered her mouth. "Be quiet, darling." He pulled her outside and slammed the door.

Sun and Na rushed to their son, who still lay on the floor.

"Zhang! Zhang! Oh goodness…I…Sun, is he badly burned?"

He turned his son's arms over in his hands, then looked at his face. "The burns…they're gone."

"What?"

Na looked at his skin, and sure enough, the burns were no longer there. "How? Did they disappear when the curse was lifted?"

"…No…that's….not it…"

The couple looked down at their son. "Zhang!" Na cried. "You're alright!"

Zhang made no effort to get up from the ground. He just kept looking at the ceiling. "It was Hua. She did it."

"What?"

"When she touched me…some sort of warm feeling came over me…She touched me so the burns would heal. It was her. She said that shamans can't heal anymore, but she can."

"Zhang…" Na put her hand on his shoulder. "She's gone, Zhang, she's not coming back."

"Don't tell me that. Once I figure out what that date means, I'll be able to save her."

Days later, Zhang was still contemplating what the significance of June 10th was. He tried to think about past conversations, anything that could be have some sort of other meaning. She wouldn't have said that if she didn't think that he could figure it out. Finally it dawned on him.

"_We're getting married when I turn thirteen."_

"Could it be…?"

The scene faded out. "But what did it mean?" Ren wondered aloud. "He didn't say, so how the hell am I supposed to know?"

He found himself in a cathedral. He heard murmuring, and turned around. His eyes widened.

Hua and Yin stood on the altar facing each other. Both were smiling, but Hua's seemed sad and forced. Her dress was red, and lilies were in her hands, but they were held loosely below her stomach.

"A wedding…" he whispered. He looked around. "Zhang, where the hell are you?"

"If there is anyone who has reason that these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Hua looked around, as if hoping that someone would. No one said anything. Sadly, she turned back to the minister. Yin nodded at him.

"Well then, I now-,"

"NAY! FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS – NAY!"

Hua whipped around to the front doors of the church. She smiled. Ren turned also.

Zhang was in the doorway, panting. He was dressed in red silk dress top with black pants, obviously the best clothes he owned. Not waiting until he caught his breath, he sprinted down the aisle and up to the altar. He grabbed Hua and held her close to him, giving her a quick kiss.

"I didn't think you were coming…" she whispered, a few tears in her eyes. "I thought you forgot about me."

He gave her a sly grin. "I don't forget things easily. Mom says it's my worst quality, because I tend to hold grudges." He glared at Yin. "Like the one I have against that bastard."

Yin looked back and forth between them. "What is the meaning of this?"

Suo stood up. "Yes, Hua. What is going on here?" A man who Ren presumed was her husband and Hua's father stood up next to her. He said nothing, and kept an expressionless face.

Hua looked around, a little scared. Zhang held her closer, showing no fear.

"Hua doesn't want to marry this guy," he said.

Suo glared at him. "What?"

"This guy's a pedophile anyways. Having sex with a twelve year old is disgusting."

"Um…"

He looked down at her. "What is it?"

"I'm thirteen now…today's my birthday."

"Oh…Well, having sex with a thirteen year old is still disgusting! How old is this guy?"

"Twenty," she whispered.

"Like I said – disgusting."

Suo's glare didn't waiver. "Is this true, Hua?" Hua hesitated, then nodded. Her attention was turned to the man holding her. "And who's this?"

He stood up straight. "I'm Xu Zhang. I took care of Miss Hua when she was sick. My family owns a clinic in town."

She looked disgusted. "I see…"

Yin shook with anger. "Yao! Suo! We already agreed on the engagement! Nothing can be changed!"

"Like hell!" Zhang turned to Hua's parents. "Listen, I know I haven't met the two of you, but I wish to have your blessing. I…" He clutched Hua and held her hand. "I'm in love with your daughter, and I-,"

He didn't finish. Hua looked over at him. His pupils were dilated. "Zhang, what is it?"

Then she saw it, a blade sticking out of his chest. She followed it up to Yin, who now stood behind him. She watched helplessly as he fell to the floor. Her body was frozen for a moment.

"ZHANG NO!"

She knelt down and turned him over. He wouldn't even speak to her. She grabbed his wrist. _There's still pulse. I can save him!_ She placed her hands over the wound, covering it, and concentrated. Suddenly, Yin pulled her off of the body.

"Darling don't touch that, it's rotten," he said with a smirk.

Hua fought against his grasp in an effort to continue the healing process, but he wouldn't loosen his grip. She eventually hung in the air, supported only by his hold. Tears streamed down her face as she kept whispering to herself. He scoffed at her.

"Can we finish this now?" he said looking back at the priest. He felt a jab. He looked down to see a sword in his chest. The holder: Fan Yao.

"Lord Yao…" he whispered. Yao only glared at him.

"Don't make my daughter cry again. Don't touch her. I'm making sure that you won't." He pulled the blade out and pushed the body back. Hua fell to the ground. Yao stroked her hair. "Finish what you started," he said softly.

She nodded silently at him and placed her hands over Zhang's wound once more. Her hands glowed as she went to work closing the hole in her beloved's body. _WORK!_

Minutes later, she had to support herself with her palms on the ground, panting. She looked to Zhang. _Please…_

Zhang blinked. He looked up at the ceiling, then sat up, shaking his head quickly.

"Ow…What happened?" He turned to see Hua with tears in her eyes. "Hua? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

She threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

"Hey… come on, what's up?" he said, returning her embrace.

"Nothing…it's nothing…"

"Hua,"

She stopped. Slowly, she let go of him and stood up to face her father. "Yes, Father?" Zhang stood up behind her. Her father looked at the both of them.

"Hua, is this the man you want to be with?"

She looked back at Zhang, then broke out into a bashful smile. "Yes," she said as she turned back to Yao. "He's the one I want."

"I see…"

Zhang looked at the floor, slowly trailing his eyes up to the lord's face. He put on a determined expression, then took a few steps in front of Hua.

"Lord Yao, I know I'm just a human, and I can barely use the five senses I'm born with, never mind a sixth. I can't see spirits, and I still don't understand a lot of things about shamans, but I…" He felt Hua hold his hand from behind. "I still love her. She's beautiful. She makes me laugh. She always thinks of others. I love her smile and her laugh. And…she never looked down upon me for being normal…for not having any spiritual powers.

"These last couple of weeks without her have been torture. I need her. I want to have her with me until the day we die. I want to marry her."

Yao raised his eyebrows. Zhang pulled Hua up beside him so he could hold her again.

"My family isn't rich, so I can't promise that I'll be able to give her the extravagant life she's been living here. But I can promise that I'll take care of her for her whole life. Even after I die, I'll take care of her."

She looked up at him, his words making her cheeks burn.

"Alright."

They stared at him. "What?"

"You have my blessing." He smiled at them. "We already have a wedding underway, so Zhang, why don't you just take Yin's place since he seems…" he looked behind him. "…unable to continue."

"But darling! He's a mortal!" Suo cried running up to him.

He shook his head. "It doesn't matter. They love each other. If we pull them apart, they'll just want each other more. Besides, isn't the fact that Hua's happy the most important thing?"

She glared Zhang. "I suppose you're right…"

The couple looked at each other. "Lord Yao, are you sure you aren't against this? I mean after all-,"

"I've never known someone who questioned a blessing. Are you trying to get me to say no? Haha!" He looked at him and knew what he meant. "If you can look past the barrier and see my daughter as more than just a shaman, then I believe I can feel at ease putting her in your care."

Neither of them complained.

Despite usual protocol, Zhang went to live in Fan Castle. It was then that "Xu" was added to the title, and thus became known as Xu/Fan Castle. His parents chose to remain in the town, reasoning that they needed to be close to the people so they could treat them.

However, there was a dispute arising over the subject of an heir to the family. Zhang reasoned that it didn't make sense for Hua to have a child at this point. She was still only thirteen, and her body was barely developed. Suo insisted for months that she should, and finally, the couple knew that they couldn't refuse any longer.

Strangely enough, Zhang had actually refused to sleep with Hua after their wedding. After saying that Yin was disgusting for taking her at such a young age, he would only be a hypocrite if he did the same. But now they found themselves with no other choice.

As they lay on their large bed, he had looked down at her sadly through his long hair, unruly when out of its ponytail. She reached up and cupped his cheek.

"Zhang, it's all right. I want this…I want you…This isn't my first time…but it's the first time I've actually wanted to do this, so please, don't feel ashamed. I wouldn't have picked anyone else in the world to father this baby. It has to be with you, or not at all." She smiled, then laughed. "Or something like that."

He finally smiled at her, then captured her lips, gradually trailing kisses down her body. The room went black.

Ren just stood with his head turned to the side. _Awkward…Very, very, awkward._

"Zhang! They're here! They're here! Come on!"

"Hua! You can't run!" He grabbed her gently to stop her.

She giggled. "Sorry. I'm just really excited to see her."

"I know, but you can't bounce around like that." He put his hand over her stomach.

"Yeah…I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking…"

He sighed. "It's okay, just think a little more next time, okay? You don't want to harm the baby."

He let her go and held her hand. They stood on the steps of their front door, Hua staring at a carriage that was making its way up the hill. She squeezed his hand.

"I'm so excited! I can't wait to see her! And him, too!"

He looked at her. Her smile was as bright and innocent as ever. Even though the baby would be born in less than a month, her personality had not suffered one bit.

Finally, the carriage stopped, and the door opened.

"Look look look!"

* * *

**Anything the Ren of the present says/does will be in italics.**

* * *

Ren turned his head forward to look at occupants of the carriage. His eyes widened.

A younger version of his mother daintily stepped onto the ground, a one-year-old Ren in her arms.

"Ran!" Hua called over waving her arm in the air. She broke into a speed walk and quickly made her way over to her. "It's so good to see you!" she said smiling. She looked at the baby in her arms, eyes wide in awe. "He looks just like you, Ran! So pretty!"

_P-P-Pretty?_

"Can I hold him? Please?"

Ran looked from her son to the mother-to-be. "You can try…but he hardly likes it when _I_ hold him." She handed Ren to her. Hua eagerly took him in her arms.

"Oh he's so cute!" she squealed and nuzzled her cheek against his. He didn't look amused. He seemed to look over the side of her arm at her stomach. When she pulled away from him, he looked straight at her. "Oooh, what pretty eyes…"

"Fat," he said bluntly, pointing at her.

"Eh?" She had a look of utter bewilderment on her face.

_Ren had a slight look of shock on his face as well. "Uh…sorry Hua…"_

Ran gave her a sympathetic look. "I told you. He doesn't like people."

Hua shrugged. "Whatever. He's a baby; he doesn't know what he's saying." She began walking away as her husband came up behind her.

Zhang went and shook hands with Ran. "Your husband didn't come?"

She shook her head. "I suppose he still has ill feelings over her sister."

He waved it off. "Nah, if he did, I'd say he wasn't worth it." He looked behind him where Hua was still walking away. "She's so excited, you know. I'd say seeing Ren's made it worse."

Ran took out her small paddle fan and laughed behind it. "Well, when she requested the engagement, how could I refuse?"

They both watched her turn the corner around the house to sit in a whicker chair in the back patio. She set Ren down on a small table to the left of it.

"Alright, Ren, we're going to have an heir-to-heir talk here."

He looked away from her. She looked slightly annoyed, but carried on.

"I'm not fat you know. I'm pregnant. I'm gonna have my baby soon. Your future wife." She smiled.

He looked back at her, and her spirits lifted.

"Ugly."

"_Double sorry."_

"Why you little-,"

She looked around to make sure no one was watching, then smacked him on the head.

"_Ho. Ly. Crap. That would have killed any other baby. Maybe she wasn't so fit to be a mom…"_

While he was recovering, she stole his right hand and placed it on her stomach. He stopped, his small yellow eyes becoming wide.

Hua sighed. "That's where she is. Where Pin-Mei is. She's going to be born next month. I know it's going to be a girl, even though mother wants a boy. I had a vision about it. It'll be a girl, and Zhang will name her Pin-Mei." She smiled sadly, staring into space, knowing she wouldn't have the opportunity to name the baby herself.

She was brought back to attention when she felt Ren place his ear in her stomach. This surprised her, but she accepted it. There was a slight vibration, and he flinched, snapping his head up and looking at Hua as if to ask her what happened.

She smiled. "She kicked. Babies do that." She giggled. "You should see what happens when she gets the hiccups!"

Ren looked at her, then down at her stomach again. He smiled, then giggled. She was, again, surprised, but followed his lead.

"_I'm…smiling…That's right…this was before…all that happened…"_

Hua suddenly brushed the baby Tao's bangs back. "You're going to grow up to be so handsome, I can tell." She kissed his forehead.

_He felt himself blush._

"Promise you'll protect Pin-Mei?"

He stared at her blankly. Her lips gave a little pout, then she retrieved a cookie from a small basket next to her.

"Okay, once again: Promise you'll love and protect my daughter?" She moved the cookie up and down. He followed it with his eyes. "Good enough. Here you go, Ren."

He took it from her and stuffed it in his mouth. Hua smiled, her head leaning on her fist, her elbow on the arm of the chair. She reached over and pulled out a miniature bottle of milk.

"Wash it down, now."

He stared at it, as if to say 'This lady's got everything!', and then grabbed it, chugging it down within ten seconds.

"Dankyuu," he said.

She took it from him before he could drop it, her eyes soft and serene. "What a cutie." She looked in the older Ren's direction, smiled, then kissed his infant counterpart on the cheek.

It went black again. An extreme sinking feeling came over Ren. He knew there was only one possible scene that could be next.

Sure enough, screams filled the room. All he could see was a small slit of light, like a door that was cracked open. He walked over to it and looked inside.

Hua was on the floor, lying on her back. Zhang, their parents, Kai, and Ran sat with the doctors around her. She screamed again, and Zhang squeezed her hand. She looked at him with tired eyes.

"Okay, I'm exhausted, let's switch now…" she said with a weak laugh.

He just looked at her. She had already told him what was going to happen after this was over.

"Hua…" He wiped the sweat off her forehead.

"Thanks…" she smiled at him, then her face twisted in pain again.

Finally, she stopped screaming. There were cheers in the room as the doctor held up the newborn baby.

"What is it? It's a boy, isn't it?" Suo said excitedly.

The doctor shook his had. "No, it's a girl."

"WHAT?"

Hua's breathing staggered. "Let me…see her…"

Zhang nodded at him, and the baby was placed beside her head. She smiled, tears in her eyes.

"I…I did this…I made her…It's so amazing…Isn't it, Zhang?"

He nodded.

"She's so beautiful…" she whispered.

He squeezed her hand. "Yes, just like you."

She looked at him and smiled, then looked at Ran. "Where's Ren? I want him to see her…" Ren waddled over to her. She smiled at him. "This is her…Pin-Mei…your wife…"

"Baby," he said.

She smiled. "That's right…Baby…" She brushed his bangs back again and turned to Zhang, tears streaming down her face. His face mirrored hers.

"I love you Zhang…with all my heart…"

"I love you too…"

"Promise me…you'll take care…of Pin-Mei…?"

"Of course, yes, anything…"

"Can I have one more kiss?"

He leaned over and gave her a passionate kiss, still careful of her frail body.

"Thank you…"

"It's nothing…I was always happy to do it…"

"Zhang…"

"What is it?"

"I…I don't want to die…"

Every single tear that was inside of him came out. She was only fourteen. Her birthday barely a month ago. Now she was leaving. Dying. He stroked her face. She turned to Pin-Mei.

"Pin-Mei…I love you…I want you to know that…Mommy's not mad at you…This isn't your fault…I promise…I'll protect you…from heaven…" She looked up at the oblivious infant Ren. "Remember…our promise…okay…?"

"Cookie?"

She laughed weakly. "Ran…give him…a cookie later…with some milk…it's in…the patio…"

_Stop it…_

She looked up at the ceiling.

"I have…no regrets…I'd…do it all…this way…again…if I had…the choice…"

_STOP IT…_

"I…will be…watching…all…of you…I…promise…I…love…you all…Thank you…so much…I'm…so…happy…"

_STOP IT!_

She closed her eyes. Her hand fell from Ren's cheek. He stared at it, then crawled over to her and started hitting her on the forehead lightly with his hand.

"Laydee! Laydee! Wake up laydee!"

"THROW HIM OUT!" Suo screamed.

"I'm sorry…" Ran whispered and gathered Ren in her arms and started to stand. "Come on, honey..."

"No…"

Everyone looked at Zhang. He was still clutching Hua's limp hand.

"She loved that boy…" He lifted his head, showing the rivers of tears that ran down his face. "She would have been okay with him doing that…She would have laughed and said something like 'He's a baby, he doesn't know any better'…"

_JUST FUCKING STOP IT!_

Everything vanished. Ren stood in the darkness, gripping his head and hiding his face.

"You see now, don't you? What that girl did?"

He lifted his head. Suo was standing in front of him. She circled him, touching his face, neck, chest, and shoulders.

"All Hua wanted to do was bring another life into this world, and that ungrateful life stole hers away from her. She killed her mother. Then her father. What would be next? The "love of her life"? What's after that? Your family? Your friends?"

Ren just stared wide-eyed into the darkness.

"She was beautiful, wasn't she? Nothing could compare to her. She wasn't capable of speaking ill of anyone. She hardly ever got angry. She loved life. Zhang loved her innocence. She had a gift we shamans all wish we had – the ability to heal. She was working on taking that ability a step further – bringing the dead back to life. Wouldn't that have been wonderful? You could bring back loved ones and… those you regret killing."

Ren flinched.

"She didn't deserve to die…my poor Hua…"

Ren clenched his fist and gritted his teeth. His bangs hid his eyes.

"Hua shouldn't have died."


	37. Tension Rising

Okay, for anyone who's still a little confused about why Suo wanted to show Ren Hua's past, this message is for you. By showing Ren all the times when Hua was happy, helping others, basically living what seemed to be the perfect life, she wanted him to "fall in love" with her. Thus, sympathizing with her and mourning her death as if he had known her personally when she died. Suo knows that Pin-Mei isn't at fault for the death of Hua, but she wants to make Ren believe it. She knows that he can easily kill her (Pin-Mei) if he doesn't hold back, so if she can set him loose on her, it's basically checkmate.

By now you're probably like "Hua is SUCH a Mary-Sue!" Well, yeah. That was my intention. At least, that's what Ren saw. He didn't see her life from beginning to end, so of course things were left out – at Suo's discretion. Of course her life wasn't perfect. Will Ren find that out, or will he fall victim to Suo's control freak complex? Nobody knows… -gets shot-

I kinda like how Ren treats Pin-Mei when they're little. I wish I had made them meet sometime immediately before or after the series, just so she could get a dose of the before and after. And see his short shorts. –nods-

**Notes: Last flashback chapter. Promise. –gets doubly shot-**

**Just to reiterate, Ren and Pin-Mei are a year and a half apart. I usually have her be two years younger because we're assuming her birthday hasn't arrived yet, leaving her two years behind.**

"**Tension Rising" from the Kingdom Hearts II soundtrack totally makes the final scene in this chapter.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Seven: Tension Rising**

* * *

Ren raised his fist, his eyes still lowered.

"Hua shouldn't have died…" he said again, his voice low and dark.

Suo stroked his cheek, gradually bringing it under his chin. "That's right. It's all HER fault. Hua could have helped you repent for your sins, bring back the innocent that you killed."

His breathing quickened. "Repent for my sins…"

"Yes, child…Kai and I are going to bring her back, but we need your help..."

"My help…?"

"I need you to get rid of Pin-Mei. We just need one last bit of furyoku to bring Hua back – hers. Once we have that, Hua will return. Then you can begin your penance…"

"I can repent…"

"Yes…yes, that's right." Her hands were creeping up his cheeks. "Will you help us with your power, Tao Ren?" Her fingers began to cover his eyes.

"I…"

"Well?"

"I…w-,"

"Ren stop!"

He felt Suo's cold and clammy hands being slapped away, and replaced with smaller, warmer ones from the front.

"Don't give in, Ren!" the voice cried. It was younger, like a woman in her twenties. It sounded familiar to him.

"Who are you?"

"I can't tell you right now, I'm sorry. But Pin-Mei needs you. You must go to her!"

His face stiffened in anger. "But she killed Hua!" he yelled.

He could see again for a split second, then was met with the intense burning of a slap. Then his eyes were covered again.

"SNAP OUT OF IT REN!" the voice said again. "Think about it; how can a baby who can't even defend itself kill someone? Even if she did, would Hua have wanted revenge? Did she seem like that kind of person to you?"

His face twitched. "She told Pin-Mei that she loved her, that she wasn't mad at her..."

"What else did she say?" the voice coaxed.

"She said…that…that it wasn't Pin-Mei's fault!"

"That's right."

The hands lifted and Ren looked around. He was back in the town where Zhang had lived. A school was beside him. A bell rang and kids ran out. A small group of preschoolers formed off to the side.

"So what do you guys want to do?

"Go to the park!"

"Yeah and play kickball!"

"Can I come?"

The tallest boy looked behind him and rolled his eyes. "Great, it's Pin-Mei." He turned around. "Oh hey."

She smiled with hopeful eyes. "So can I come too?"

He put on a thinking face. "No way."

Her smile fell. "Why not?"

"You cheat."

"Wha? No I don't!"

"Yeah, you get your little ghost friends to help you!"

"No I don't!"

The girls in the group hid behind the boy. "Watch out Gen! She might put a curse on you!"

"She's so creepy!"

"Don't shamans worship the devil or something?"

"My mom told me I'd go to Hell if I played with her!'

Gen stared down at her, arms folded. "You heard 'em. You can't come."

"But why?"

"CAUSE YOU'RE A FREAK!" the group cried in unison.

Pin-Mei looked completely devastated. She started crying and ran down the street, her small ponytails trailing from under her hair.

Suddenly, he was in Xu/Fan castle. Pin-Mei, still crying, ran down the halls toward her father's room. Loud voices came from it as she approached. She pounded on the door.

"Daddy! Daddy!" When no one came to the door, she called a few more times, then left to go to her room.

Ren watched as she opened the door and walked into a large room lined with dolls and stuffed animals. She took a large panda and hugged it, then curled up against another one that was at least five times bigger than her.

"Gang," she said looking at her smaller panda. "I wish Mommy was here, then Daddy wouldn't be so sad." She clutched it and buried her face in it. "Maybe Mommy would play with me. I just wish someone would." She started crying again.

Ren looked at her sadly. _This is why she's so used to crying._

Pin-Mei suddenly stood up and stomped over to her dresser. She snatched a porcelain egg from the top of it and smashed it on the floor. She did the same with two others, screaming at the top of her lungs. Panting, she collapsed to the floor and curled up into a little ball of misery.

"I don't want this…" she said, hiccupping tears. "I don't want to be a shaman! I don't want to be a freak! I want to be normal! I hate shamans! I hate them! I wish they never existed!"

Ren knelt on the floor next to her. He didn't take her words to heart. He didn't remember ever feeling like that, that he didn't want to be a shaman, but he knew it was because of the way his father had buried him in the idea of Tao family pride from such a young age. It was all he ever knew. He didn't have the chance to regret being a shaman. He had always thought he was above humans. Being alone at school had never bothered him. In his mind, they were all too stupid and simpleminded to have an intelligent conversation with.

The door burst open and a young Rong ran in. "Lady Pin-Mei! Welcome home!" She skidded to a halt when she saw the smashed porcelain on the floor. "What happened?"

Pin-Mei turned over so her back faced her. "Fell," she said, not even bothering to give her a full sentence.

Rong, at nine years old, had learned to deal with Pin-Mei's moodiness. It was brought on by the realization that she had no friends except for a stuffed panda, and that her father spent all his time with women in order to forget the wife he had lost. She knew that Pin-Mei was just lonely, and with no one to turn to, she took her frustration out on the people who dared to talk to her. Overall, she was the textbook definition of a bratty heir.

Rong calmly left and brought back a dust pan and a broom. She swept the broken remains into the pan and threw them away. When she had put the pan and broom back, she came back and stroked the tiny girl's hair.

"They made fun of you again, huh?"

"What do you think?"

She bowed her head. "I guess it was a dumb question. Sorry." She lifted it again and scooted over so she could look at her. "But I have some news that might cheer you up."

"What?" her master said in a sharp, snappy voice.

Rong smiled. "You and Lord Zhang are going on a trip!"

"Oh. Awesome. How many women is he taking with him?"

"None."

Pin-Mei sat up. "None?"

Rong smiled and nodded. "None."

Pin-Mei's mouth turned up slightly, then fell again. "Wait, where are we going?"

"To visit some friends of your parents. Well, actually, they were closer to your mother than your father. I can't go with you right away, but I'll be joining you later on."

"My mother?" She looked over at a framed photo of Hua, who was smiling away without a care in the world. She smiled. "Maybe this won't be so bad…"

Ren stood as things went black again. _I only have one guess as to where they're going._

Sure enough, he found himself in his front hall.

"She's grown so big!" Ran exclaimed. She bent down and smiled at the little girl. "Hello there, Pin-Mei. I'm Ran. I was a friend of your mother's."

Pin-Mei looked at her skeptically, but then smiled a little and raised her hand at her. "Hello Miss Ran!"

She laughed and patted her head. "Just like her mother," she said standing up. Pin-Mei looked up at her and blinked.

"Just like Mom…" she whispered.

Ran looked to either side of her. "Where is he?" She turned around. "Ren! Come over here and welcome our guests!"

Ren held his breath and waited for his younger self to appear. _I'm never going to get used to this._

* * *

**Again, present Ren will be in italics**

* * *

"I'm coming! Gods…"

Pin-Mei squinted as she looked into the shadows. She tilted her head as she saw the six year-old boy emerge from the darkness, his eyes cold, his arms crossed in annoyance.

Ran waved him over, putting her hand behind him as he approached. "Pin-Mei, this is my son Ren. Ren, this is Pin-Mei, the daughter Xu Hua. Remember her?"

"No," he replied bluntly.

Pin-Mei looked up at him. He stared down at her in disgust.

She raised her hand in greeting. "Hi Ren!"

"…Hi." He turned his head away from her.

She kept staring at him in awe. "He's…so cool…" she whispered.

Ran looked at her and smiled. Then she looked at Zhang. "How have you been?"

"…Fine," he replied in an airy voice.

At twenty-four, Zhang was a shell of a man. He had isolated himself from Pin-Mei and everyone else in the house, but especially her. He didn't want to look at her. It reminded him too much of what he had lost. Now, as he stood in front of Tao Ran, he looked years older, almost withering away.

"Zhang, we're going to have dinner now, and I want you to join us. It'll do you some good to spend time with your daughter."

Pin-Mei looked up at him. He looked down at her for a moment, then looked away. "I suppose."

"I'm going." Ren turned and began walking away. Pin-Mei stared after him.

Ran turned to watch her son leave. "Honestly…"

After another moment of staring, Pin-Mei ran past her and started walking behind him. He looked back at her.

"What do you want?" She just stared at him with her big black eyes. "What?" When she still didn't answer, he walked faster so he could get away from her. She walked faster also. He broke out into a run, and she followed. "GRAH! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

_Ren smiled a little bit. She really had been following him around since they first met. He shook his head, still smiling. "Brat."_

A new scene. This time in Ren's room. It was during the night and the young scion was sleeping soundly in his bed. The door opened, and Pin-Mei peeked her head in. She entered and closed the door quietly behind her.

_He looked closely at her. She was obviously upset. Scared maybe._

Sure enough, she was hiccuping, biting on her lip to try and muffle her whimpers. She walked over to where he lay, reaching her hand out to touch his wrist or shoulder, but hesitating. She looked back at the door, considering leaving, but turned back to the bed.

"N-Niisama…" she said in a loud whisper, shaking his wrist. He moaned and turned over. She started to lose it. "Niisama," she said a little louder. She shook his shoulder.

He groaned and flipped back over, groggily opening his eyes. He rolled onto his stomach and reached for the clock on his nightstand. After looking at it, he slammed it down and wiped his hand down the front of his face.

"Niisama, I-,"

"Do. You. Have. ANY. Idea. What. Time. It. Is?"

"Um…"

He grabbed his clock and stuck it in her face. She blinked at it.

"I can't tell time, Niisama."

He growled and slammed it back onto the nightstand. "IT'S 2:47!"

"I'm sorry! I just…"

"This better be a helluva good reason." He cracked his knuckles subconsciously.

She stiffened. "I-I-I-I-I had a bad dream."

He stopped. "THAT'S IT?"

She started full-on crying. "I had a dream that a bad person with long hair killed Mommy and you and me. I'm scared! I don't want to be alone!"

"So what the hell am I supposed to do about it?"

"Can I sleep with you?"

He face-palmed. "You can't be serious." He put his hand down and went back under the covers. "Go sleep with your dad."

"I can't. He locked his door. He doesn't like being around me…because I look like mommy."

Ren, who'd had his eyes closed, opened them and stared at the wall with an expression even his older self couldn't fully understand. He sat up.

"Come on. Get up here, brat."

He watched her face light up as he scooted over to let her jump up onto the massive bed. She blushed when he lifted his arm and she crawled under it.

"Thank you Niisama," she said as she clung to him, her eyes closing.

"Yeah, yeah. Just don't get used to this." But his face wasn't as harsh as his tone. Still, he wasn't smiling, more like reminiscing events of the past.

The two children faded.

"What's next?" Ren asked, hoping the voice would answer him.

"What you're about to see may hurt you, but you _have_ to see it. I wouldn't show it to you if I didn't feel the need to."

A questioning look was on his face as he saw his bedroom door open. Pin-Mei walked in, followed by Ren. He didn't look any different from the one watching the scene.

"_Wait…when was this?" _

He noticed the formal robes that he was clad in.

"_No…don't tell me…"_

He watched himself yell at her, then take his shirt off, revealing the curse seal. Pin-Mei sadly and reluctantly raised her DaDao against him, only to throw it away. He smirked at her then slammed her into the wall by her neck.

"_What am I doing…?"_

He threw her onto the bed.

"_What are you doing? She hates that!"_

She was kissed forcefully, the privacy of her body beginning to be invaded.

"_Don't touch her like that!"_

Her robes were opened.

_He shut his eyes. "I can't watch this…" The hands forced them open. _

"_Ren, you HAVE TO watch this. I know it hurts, but this is what happened. You need to know what you did, and you need to remember what that curse seal looks like."_

_He tried to squint, but his eyes wouldn't close. "DAMMIT!"_

His hands touched her hips, then slid down her legs.

"_Pin-Mei! Why aren't you struggling? Why don't you run?" he screamed at her._

"_Because she knew she had no chance of escaping from you. You're faster and stronger than her. You could have easily caught her, and then you would have just been rougher with her."_

"_So she just gave up?"_

"_No. She accepted that it was going to happen, that she was powerless to stop it. She decided to just close her eyes and hope it would end quickly."_

Ren saw Pin-Mei raise her hand to touch the face of his cursed self.

"_Pin-Mei..."_

"_She believed in you, that you didn't want it to be this way."_

He pinned her wrists to the mattress.

"_No…"_

Jun burst in. Their parents followed. Ren was restrained, and Pin-Mei stood in front of him to touch his face once more.

"_Why don't you hate me…?"_

The scene ended. He fell to his knees, shaking his head. "I can't believe this…" He covered his face. "What have I done…She'll never be able to trust me again…I saved her from people who were going to do that exact same thing to her, then _I_ go and do it! I still don't understand why she wanted to save me from being tortured."

Arms draped over him from behind. "Did you see what else you did to her?"

He looked up? "You mean there's MORE?"

There was a giggle. "You already saw it. You saw how lonely and bitter she was at home. When she met you, do you remember any moment when you two were young that she was like that with you? Forget the weight-throwing thing."

He thought for a moment. "No. No, I don't."

"_You _did that to her. _You_ made her forget those feelings. _You_ made her genuinely smile when all she used to do was cry. _You _let her know she wasn't alone, that someone else felt her pain. That was all _you_."

"_Me_?"

"Yes. In her eyes, you saved her. She began to admire you, she wanted to be like you."

"Pfft. That's a laugh."

"No it isn't. She admired your strength. Your bravery. Your kindness. She saw those qualities in you and wanted them to be hers, and by experiencing those qualities through you, she felt at ease. That's when she began falling in love with you. You're the only person she's ever openly hugged. She trusts you. She won't let one incident ruin that perfect picture of you that she has in her mind."

He didn't reply, just seemed lost in thought. A blindfold was wrapped around his head, covering his eyes once more.

"It'll just be easier this way."

Ren simply nodded.

"You know what you have to do?"

"I have to save her. I owe it to her. I have to tell her I'm sorry. I have to bring her home. I have to make up for this. I need to repent."

His hand was brought up to a face, and he could feel it as it shook from side to side a few times.

"Penance is a stupid idea. What's done is done. No matter what you do, Ren, it won't undo what happened. Now, just concentrate on getting her back and letting her know how much you love her so she'll know that she was right to believe in you."

He slowly nodded again.

"Promise to save her?"

"Yes, I promise."

There was a giggle. "Good boy."

A cookie was stuck in his mouth. He blinked under the blindfold. A hand touched his cheek and turned it. The other one was kissed.

"Good luck, cutie."

"Wait…"

He blinked. He was back in Xu/Fan Castle. Suo was behind him.

"So, Tao Ren, are you going to lend us your power or not? Will you help me bring my beautiful daughter back to life?"

Ren stared at the ceiling, his eyes closed.

_Thank you._

He opened them. "You're right, Hua was pretty." He turned to face her, a smile on his face.

"But not as beautiful as my Pin-Mei."

She scowled at him. "You wretched boy! How could you resist her?"

"It's unfortunate that she died, but I don't think she wants to come back. It was _because_ of her that I was able to resist her."

"Impossible! Hua said she didn't want to die!"

Ren looked at the ceiling again. "I'm not sure what made her change her mind, but I'm not going to help bring her back-," He brandished Houraiken. "—especially if it means killing Pin-Mei." He narrowed his eyes and pointed the blade at her. "For the last time, MOVE!"

Suo looked phased for a moment, then hid behind her fan. "Alright, Tao Ren. I'll allow you to go see your dear Pin-Mei. I hope you two have a lovely reunion." She cackled and vanished.

Ren looked around. "Bason!" he called.

"Here, Bocchama!" The spirit appeared behind him.

His master put on a confident grin. "Perfect. Let's go."

He raced down the stairs, Bason not far behind him. Suddenly, he realized they were short one spirit.

"Bason, where's Ma Ying?"

"She disappeared without my knowledge. I apologize, Bocchama."

"Tch. Don't worry about it. She's probably gone to Pin-Mei."

When they reached the bottom, Ren skidded to a stop and looked at the large door in front of him. It was iron, and a double door set. The Fan family seal was in the center.

_This is it. Don't worry, Pin-Mei. I'm coming for you._

He pushed the doors open. The room behind them was larger than a ballroom. Thick pillars were on either side of the room, with a small, slightly elevated stage in the back. He could make out Suo and Kai's forms. Carefully, he began walking across the room.

"So nice of you to come, Renny," Kai called.

"Thanks for inviting me," Ren replied. "And don't call me Renny. I have enough reason to kill you as it is. I don't need one more."

"Hmph. I don't think my sister would like you threatening to kill me."

"Threats and promises are two completely different things."

"That they are…Still, Hua never tolerated anyone harassing me…"

"So?"

Suddenly, a blade was under his chin. Ren lowered his eyes, not believing what he saw.

A girl in a black orient halter and skirt with black pants stood in front of him. A clip on the top of her held her black bangs from her eyes, and black braids could be seen behind her. Nothing seemed to bounce as she moved closer to him, Minbouken still at his throat, until her face was in front of his. Faded blue eyes glared at him.

Ren's eyes were wide in disbelief. "Hua?"

Her eyes narrowed even more.

"Tao Ren, for your sins, I will kill you."


	38. Who's Suffering Now?

I hate chapters like this because I need to be picky and choosy about when I let Ren cry. I mean, **he's Ren** - I can't have him crying every time something bad happens.

I bought the Shaman King GBA game "Master of Spirits". The dub names are killing me. Apparently, I have to defeat some person named Len Tao –twitch-

I seriously don't think I've had Bason say anything besides "Bocchama!" this whole story. Go one-word vocabularies!

I won't feel offended if some of you write reviews that include "I HATE PIN-MEI!" after this chapter. Go crazy.

**Notes: There's going to be sex talk in this chapter, because the "rape" is going to be a hot topic. Nothing horribly explicit, like organs or anything, but this is still a warning, just so you can't say I didn't warn you.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Eight: Who's Suffering Now?**

* * *

"Hua…why?"

She only pushed the blade closer to his throat.

"I'll never forgive you for what you did – NEVER!"

She swung at him. Ren dodged it by jumping backward, then flipping across the room. Just as he regained his footing, she was in front of him again, swinging madly. He dodged them, then met her with him own blade. They pushed against each other until Ren overpowered her and hit her across the room. He stared at her.

_Why is she doing this? Wasn't she just telling me to come and rescue Pin-Mei? Wait…How can that even be her if Suo was just asking for my help to bring her back?_

He smirked. "Nice try, Suo," he called over to the evil woman. "Even I know that can't really be Hua since she's dead. Don't insult my intelligence." _It must be a fake of some kind. Like they created a body that resembled hers and stuck a spirit in it. _"Bason! Hyoi Gattai! In Houraiken!" He got ready for the next assault.

To his surprise, Suo was laughing behind her fan. While he was distracted, Hua almost got a clean cut on him. He blocked and shallowly slashed down the center of her chest. Then he gave a tremendous kick to her midsection that sent her flying backwards and into a wall. Her back hit it in full force. A cloud of dust rose as she slumped to the ground.

Ren panted as he looked at her. Before the dust could settle and allow him to have a clear view of her again, Suo's laugh made him snap his head in her direction.

"What's so funny?" he yelled over.

She acted like she was trying to stop herself, but obviously wasn't. "Forgive me, I just find this fight so entertaining! I couldn't have asked for a better show! Now that I've seen you in action, Tao Ren, I understand why my daughter ran to your mother the moment she knew she was pregnant. She somehow knew she was going to have a girl, although a boy would have been so much better. A gift of foresight it would seem."

"Foresight?"

"Of course. Hua was exceptionally talented. In addition to healing, she had a foresight ability that showed itself every so often. Of course, the effect that those talents had on her body was…unfortunate."

Ren gripped the sword tighter. "What do you mean?"

For a moment, Ren thought he saw a look of genuine sadness on her face.

"Her body was frail. It didn't take much for her to get tired to the point of collapsing. It's the curse that comes with receiving powers that most shamans don't have these days."

"And knowing that, you still forced her to have a baby!"

"You're complaining? Would you rather not have met Pin-Mei?"

He stopped, then stared at the floor.

"Ha! You didn't think of that, did you? If Hua had not become pregnant, you'd still be back at your castle – by yourself. Alone, just like a good little shaman should be." She smiled at his further pained face. "You think I wanted my daughter to die? She was supposed to win the Shaman Fight. With her abilities, it would have been easy for her."

Ren chuckled and lifted his head. "If you really believe that, you're even more ignorant than I thought," he said. "There was one opponent there capable of killing all the other participants. Unless Hua had the power of a god, or goddess, she would have been no different."

Suo gritted her teeth, then softened and let out her own small laugh. "You still forget that I hold the winning hand, Tao Ren. I still have Pin-Mei."

He clenched his fist, realizing she was right. "Where is she?" he yelled.

She put on a look surprise. "You didn't notice her? She greeted you as you came in."

"Lord Ren, are you aware of the phrase, 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?'" Kai said laughing.

His eyes widened. "What?"

More faux shock. "Hm? Shouldn't a husband at least know what his wife looks like, even if her hairstyle is slightly different?" She looked as if she were deep in thought. "Wasn't Hua's hair violet and not black?"

It was then that Ren remembered why Hua had looked slightly different. She was shorter and had black hair. The only person who could pass for Hua and had black hair…was Pin-Mei. Then why were her eyes blue?

"_Pin-Mei, where are the blue contacts I told you to wear?"_

He snapped his head to the wall where the girl had fallen to the ground. The clip on her head had broken and fallen out to bring Pin-Mei's bangs back into place. He suddenly felt like he couldn't breathe. He could see red on her chest. Blood. He had slashed her chest. The very person he was trying to protect. He had told Zhang he refused to hurt her again, and now he had.

"PIN-MEI!" he screamed as he ran over to her. His mind was racing. All he could think about was making sure she wasn't dead.

As he got closer, he could see her pulling herself up and supporting herself with the wall, seemingly removing the contacts. He felt a wave of relief wash over him.

"Pin-Me-,"

He stopped short as she lifted Minbouken and pointed it at him. He stared at it with wide eyes.

"Pin-Mei, wha-,"

"STAY AWAY FROM ME! DON'T TOUCH ME!" she screamed as loud as she could. The look in her eyes wasn't that of fear, but of pure hatred.

He reached out to touch her, thinking that he could calm her down if he did. "Pin-Mei…"

She swung her blade and pointed it at him again.

"I'LL KILL YOU I SWEAR! DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!"

He did anyway, and she swung at him again. Nimbly, he dodged and was up against her, his hand over hers, which held her weapon. He removed it from her hand and threw it to the ground. With her right wrist in his left hand, and his right hand against the wall, he leaned in and kissed her, trying to recreate their first back in Tokyo.

At first, Pin-Mei was frozen, her eyes wide in surprise, but then she regained her senses and pushed him away. She pulled back and slapped his left cheek. Ren took a few steps backward, his head still turned from the impact of the slap. He squeezed his eyes shut for a few moments, breathed deeply, and opened them again.

"How do YOU like being slapped, huh?" she yelled. She touched her own cheek, the one he had slapped the last night they were together. The hand turned into a fist. "I'll never forgive you, you hear me? No matter what you do I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! I'LL KILL YOU IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!"

He rubbed his eyes lightly with his right hand and slowly turned to her.

"I'm sorry, Pin-Mei…" he said. "If I had done a better job protecting you, then this wouldn't have happened…I just don't know how I can make you understand how much I wish this hadn't happened…I know I hurt you…I know you've been suffering, and I came here so I can take you home and make that suffering stop…Pin-Mei…I want to make things right…I want to take that pain away, but you need to let me do it…"

"I've let you 'do it' enough."

"…What?"

She gave him the most piercing glare. "Forgotten what it feels like to be inside me already? Was I that worthless that you can't even bother to remember the experience? Am I not as good as your concubines?"

He stared at her. Hua had told him and shown him that Jun had come in and stopped him from…doing it. But now Pin-Mei, the victim, was telling him he _had_ followed through with it. Was he supposed to tell her that she had imagined it, that she was still a virgin? How was he supposed to tell her that she was wrong when she had obviously lost all faith and trust in him? Had Hua been wrong about everything?

She scoffed at his surprised face. "You still don't remember? Well then I'll tell you. You pinned me down on that bed and ripped my clothes off, then your own. You covered my mouth so I couldn't scream when you broke into me. You must have done it at least two or three times. I was in pain the whole time, but you didn't care. All you cared about was yourself and your own pleasure. Because of what you did, I'll probably be pregnant soon."

His eyes widened.

"But I can't stand the thought of having a child with your blood coursing through its veins inside of me, so after I kill you, I'll do the same to myself." She glared at him, his face even more disturbed. "I would have given it to you if you waited, but you just couldn't do that. You felt the need to take it from me."

She bowed her head so he couldn't see her eyes.

"No matter how many times a day I shower, no matter how long I'm rinsing myself under the water, I come out feeling as dirty as I was when I went in. You've stained me. The only way I can be clean again is if I kill you. Even if it's only for a few moments before I'm dead also, I want to be pure again."

She raised her head.

"So if you really love me at all, you'll let me kill you."

Ren was the one with a bowed head now. "It's true that I love you, and that I'm willing to die for you, but this isn't what I meant. I meant that I'd sacrifice myself so that I could protect you. If you're just going to kill yourself after you kill me, then I can't do that." He looked at her. "Pin-Mei, I don't want to fight you. Let's just talk."

"…I hate you…"

"…What…what did you say?"

"**I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU TAO REN! I HATE YOU!"**

Ren's eyes were wide with an unfamiliar feeling- horror. He couldn't breathe. He just wanted to throw up. The words kept repeating themselves over and over in his mind. She had said she wanted to kill him, but he wasn't ready for those three words.

"_I love you, Ren…I love you so much…"_

Inside, he felt himself crumbling. He was alone again. No one loved him. He thought he'd never have to worry about loneliness again after she had told him she loved him. He felt as if he had taken it for granted. Now, she hated him and wanted him to die.

"You can't mean that…"

She glared at him. "Do I LOOK like I'm kidding?"

He stared at the floor, his eyes still wide. "No…"

"Bocchama!"

"What?"

He snapped his head up just in time to see her picking up her sword. Ma Ying appeared next to her.

"Ma Ying, you have to stop her!" he called over.

The spirit looked at him apathetically. "Why would I do that? If Lady Pin-Mei wishes for you to die, then why would I deny her that pleasure?"

"What?"

A look of extreme anger grew on her face. "This is not only her revenge, but mine as well."

He stiffened. "Revenge? For what?"

Her eyes pierced him. "One hundred years ago, your family was sent to murder the emperor of Siam. I was the leader of a group of his guards, and my husband led another. Your ancestors killed him. You took my love away from me, and I died hoping that I could someday avenge his death." She grinned. "My chance came ten years ago when you awoke me from my grave and trapped me inside that memorial tablet and gave me to Lady Pin-Mei. Once she told me you were of the Tao family, I knew that my chance for retribution would soon be arriving. And now, thanks to Lady Suo and Lord Kai, and of course Lady Pin-Mei, my chance has come." She laughed. "Prepare yourself, scion of Tao. This basement shall be your tomb."

Ren couldn't believe all these things being thrown at him at once. Pin-Mei hated him and wanted him dead, and now Ma Ying had revealed she wanted the same. A fight was inevitable. One of them was going to bleed, if not both.

"Ma Ying! Hyoi Gattai! In Minbouken!"

He looked down at Houraiken. With its power, if he used it, he would surely kill her. He put it away and took out his Kwan Dao, taking a moment to look at the stickers of him and Pin-Mei.

_I'll bring you back, Pin-Mei. Then we can go home._

"Bason! Hyoi Gattai! In Bason-tou!"

He had barely looked up when she was right in his face. He quickly blocked and they went into a deadlock. Ren was simply blocking, but Pin-Mei was trying as hard as she could to break his guard and move in for the kill. Their blades shook under to force being exerted on each of them.

"We don't need to do this, Pin-Mei."

They jumped apart, and she charged at him again. As they crossed blades again, she began bashing him as hard as she could, trying to push him backwards.

"Yes. We. DO!"

She jumped back and charged yet again. He blinked and she disappeared. Surprised, he looked around. He couldn't see her. Suddenly, he could feel cold steel on the back of his neck. He stiffened.

"I didn't think it'd be so easy to get behind you. Have you gone soft, Ren?"

He ran and turned so he could face her. She had a smug look on her face. He couldn't comprehend her increase in speed.

_How was she able to get behind me? Did she get that much better in a month?_

Suo smiled at Kai. "He thinks she got stronger," she whispered to him, trying not to laugh. "He doesn't realize that he's just being weak right now. He's holding back more than he realizes. As a result, Pin-Mei currently has the upper hand. He'll keep losing confidence until she finally kills him. Then she'll kill herself, and our precious Hua will be back with us."

Kai smirked. "I can hardly wait."

Pin-Mei looked at her former lover the same way he had when he was able to get behind her during their last duel – as if he were a fool. "Ren, darling, if you come over here now, I'll make it nice, quick, and clean. I can't promise it'll be painless, but three out of four isn't bad, right?"

Ren just continued staring at her. The Pin-Mei that he knew would never talk like that. He had told her to never call him "darling" again. At this point, he would have taken any affectionate word she had for him, but this wasn't what he had in mind.

_It's almost as if she's…_

Then he saw it.

Where he had slashed her shirt, the fabric was ripped open down the center just enough so he could see a picture of a bird locked in a cage – the Fan family curse seal. Everything she had said, everything she had done to him here was the result of a curse. Pin-Mei was a prisoner in her own body. But he couldn't figure out why she wasn't crying like he had. She was more in tune to her emotions than he was, so she should have started crying by now. So why…

"You finally see it."

He looked behind him where Suo was standing on the stage. She was fanning herself.

"Ooh, what a show! Great entertainment! You two have such great chemistry! How else could a show be this enthralling?"

He gritted his teeth. "SUO!"

"Oh goodness, there's that temper again."

"Release Pin-Mei NOW!"

"I'm afraid I can't do that. You see, if we did, then you two would just run off together, and I simply can't have that. However, you could free her yourself…"

"HOW?"

She laughed. "The only way for an outsider to break the curse is to stab the cursed in the center of the seal…she might die, though."

He looked at Pin-Mei, who was seemingly frozen, as if awaiting instructions. _What a fucking choice._ Then he realized something.

"Pin-Mei isn't an outsider, so why can't she just break it herself?"

Suo sighed and shook her head. "Pin-Mei IS an outsider. Her father is a mere human. It has contaminated our bloodline. She's weak because only one of her parents was a shaman. Have children with her and your bloodline will become impure as well. I don't know how your mother convinced your father that the blood would still be pure with children from that girl, but she must have a way with words. In a way, I'm saving your precious Tao bloodline - you should thank me."

"SO WHAT?" he yelled.

She was startled. "What?"

"I don't give a damn about bloodlines." He looked at Pin-Mei, clenching his fists. "I'd rather mess it up and be with someone I love rather than keep it pure and be with someone who couldn't care less about me. And she's NOT weak. She has to be pretty damn strong to put up with all the shit you put her through. Anyone else would have committed suicide by now."

She sighed again, dismissing him. "The short of it is, Tao Ren, Pin-Mei hardly has any of the Fan family qualities. It took a level 10 charm to fully place you under the curse; it only took a level 2 for Pin-Mei – one level above a normal human being. Unlike you, she won't be coming to her senses anytime soon. Her soul is totally encased and her will is in my hands. Speaking of which…"

She turned her attention to her doll. "Pin-Mei, darling, you may continue. Kill him."

"Yes, grandmother." She charged at Ren.

He jumped over her, but failed to notice that she had stabbed Minbouken into the ground, wires attached to the hilt. She skidded about twenty feet away and spun around. Still in the air, he looked at her from over his shoulder. She smirked.

"**AYWER'S REDEMPTION!"**

She pulled the wires as hard as she could. Her sword began spinning, starting off slow, then getting faster and faster until a cyclone formed and engulfed him. He was tossed around inside, his furyoku being stolen from him. It ended when he was tossed out. He slammed into a wall and fell to the floor.

He felt so tired. The vortex had taken every last bit of furyoku he'd had inside him. Bason appeared next to his master, obviously concerned.

"Bocchama!"

Ren turned to him. "I think this might be close to the end. I don't know what that attack was, but it was pretty damn effective. I'm exhausted…I couldn't make an oversoul now even if I wanted to." He looked up as she approached him.

"Well, well…Look what we have here," she said with an evil grin. "And here I thought you were strong. My mistake."

He just looked up at her, not saying anything.

"Aww, don't look at me like that. I almost feel bad for you. Don't worry, it'll be over soon."

She raised Minbouken over him, getting ready to slice through his heart. He tried to protect himself by raising his Kwan Dao to block, though his arms still felt weak.

She laughed at him. "Silly boy."

With that, she brought the blade down. Ren closed his eyes and waited. Nothing happened. Slowly, he opened one eye, then both. He looked up at her, his eyes wide.

She was frozen, her eyes just as wide as his. He looked at his Kwan Dao, and noticed the club photo stickers. They had stopped her. Something in her had remembered that night.

"_Can we do it? Pleeeeease?"_

"_Fine. ONE SHEET."_

"_Will you smile? I want to be able to look at it and think I made you happy."_

"_Yeah...fine…but only because you asked me to…"_

"Pin-Mei?" he whispered to her earnestly.

Her eyes darkened and became their usual black again. "What…what am I doing…?" She looked at him, and then at her sword. "Ren…" She started crying. "What have I been doing?"

Suddenly, she grabbed her chest and screamed. He could see the crest glowing. Behind her, Suo was putting more furyoku into the seal to regain control over her. Pin-Mei clutched her body and stared at the ground.

_Pin-Mei…Can you hear me, Pin-Mei?_

She looked up. "Yes I can hear you."

Ren looked at her. Who was she talking to?

_Pin-Mei…Your time of decision…it's now._

"You mean that choice I have to make?"

_Yes…You can save yourself, or you can save Ren. Which will you choose?_

"Myself or Ren…" She screamed as more pain came to her chest.

_You must decide quickly. Suo will soon regain control over you, and then Ren will inevitably die. One of you has to. Will it be you…or him?_

"Me or him?" More pain.

_DECIDE!_

She gave a weak smile and picked up Minbouken and raised it. He watched her. "What are you doing?"

"Well…If only one of us can live, I choose…"

Ren's eyes widened.

"**PIN-MEI!"**


	39. The Many Wrongs of Rong

This chapter provides some insight on Rong's relationship with Pin-Mei. Yes, some more flashbacks, but not for the whole thing. This is just to get the group to the scene so they can deal with the upcoming events. Yes, Jun came. I don't know if she brought Pyron yet. I just needed her there for a later scene. No, she isn't my 2nd fave character (that spot belongs to Hao), but she deserves more respect than she gets. So yeah, Jun's here.

When I came up with the Ren vs. Pin-Mei fight about a month and a half ago, it was oh so different. Originally, Pin-Mei didn't say anything, only attacked. The "Aywer's Redemption" attack didn't exist. At that time, the curse seal didn't exist, so no cutting shirts open. Yoh and co. didn't arrive until the VERY END. Jun wasn't there. And a later scene with Pin-Mei didn't exist. So yeah, a LOT of changes.

**Notes: It is a really really bad thing to give someone a clock as a gift in China. The word for clock in Chinese sounds similar to "death", so it is to be avoided. Giving scissors or anything sharp symbolizes severing the ties of a relationship. Also, don't wrap gifts in white, blue or black paper, or write in red ink. All have connotations to funerals and/or death. Finally, don't give gifts in single or odd numbers, and don't give it in fours either. Odd numbers signify loneliness or separation. The number four also sounds like the word "death." **

**In China, it's customary for someone to decline a gift at least two or three times before accepting it. The giver is expected to insist until the receiver accepts the gift. The gift is not opened in the presence of the giver unless they are instructed to (this rule isn't followed in this chapter, just to show how bratty Pin-Mei is).**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Thirty-Nine: The Many Wrongs of Rong**

* * *

"_Rong, today you will begin tending to Lady Pin-Mei. It is your duty to protect her with your life. Do not dishonor the Wei family name."_

_A seven year-old Rong nodded. "I understand." _

_She walked into her master's room and found her sitting with a tiger plushie. She was in a navy blue jacket and pants, and her long black hair draped over her shoulders. Her black eyes were narrowed in anger, as if permanently. Despite the army of cute and cuddly stuffed animals that surrounded her, she had the potential to look evil._

"_What do you want?" she snapped at her._

_Rong blinked at her curt attitude, but knew she could do nothing against it. After all, she was just the maid servant. Instead, she bowed._

"_Lady Pin-Mei, I am Wei Rong. From this day forward, I am your maid servant. I will do anything you desire and protect you with my life."_

_The two year-old stared at her. "Whatever. I don't care." She turned over and away from her._

_Rong, not knowing what else to do, sat on the ground and waited for Pin-Mei to need her._

_She soon learned why a girl so young was already so cold and heartless. Suo had told her from a young age that she killed her mother, and that it was her fault her father was sad and always kept away from her. The servants in the house ostracized her as well. They moved out of the way when she walked by them. Not out of respect, but almost out of fear. She was cursed. A half-breed. It was unlucky to be around her._

"_I feel so sorry for you, Rong," one servant said to her. "You have to follow her everywhere she goes. Her bad luck will rub off on you."_

"_She's not so bad. She just doesn't know how to show her emotions," she had replied._

_When Suo's birthday came around, Rong found herself wrapping a clock in white paper – Pin-Mei's present to her. She knew it was wrong, but Pin-Mei threw a tantrum until she got her way. When she was done, Pin-Mei took a red marker and wrote the number four on the package._

_Pin-Mei gave it to Suo that night. The crowd gasped, but the toddler just smiled sweetly. _

"_The child probably doesn't know any better," her grandmother said while a smile. _

_But after the guests had left, Suo took out one of her fans and began beating her._

"_How dare you give such an awful present to your grandmother!" she yelled. "You should honor me for allowing you to stay in this house! You COULD just go live a poor life back in town, but your mother would haunt me if I threw you out. You're only here because of your mother, but your mother isn't here because of YOU!"_

_Pin-Mei was bleeding on the ground. Her body ached so much that she couldn't move. She could feel the bruises forming as she looked up at the evil woman before her. The fan was raised again and she shut her eyes._

_Suddenly, she felt a body cover hers, taking the blows for her. She looked up and saw Rong's face twisted in agony. She was shielding her from the pain._

"_Why?" Pin-Mei asked._

"_Because a baby like you doesn't need to be in so much pain."_

_After that day, Pin-Mei began to treat Rong a little better than everyone else around the Xu/Fan castle. Not much better, but better still. _

_On her third birthday, Rong noticed that Pin-Mei now had long pigtails hidden under her hair in the back. She found it odd, as her mistress had always loved her long hair and never let Rong do anything with it but brush it. Now it had been cut so only the back was longer than her cheeks._

"_Why the sudden change?"_

"_Grandmother's orders." She snapped her head away from her. "Where's my present?"_

_Rong left and came back with a bag. "Here it is."_

"_I don't want it."_

"_Won't you please take it?"_

"_No."_

"_I promise you'll like it."_

_The heir snatched the bag from her and opened to it. She lifted a large stuffed panda from the tissue paper. Rong held her breath as she looked it over._

"_I like it, it's soft," she said finally. Her mouth turned up slightly. "Thank you."_

_Her servant blinked at her, astonished at the sudden use of manners. "I'm honored that you like it."_

_Pin-Mei walked over to her giant panda and set her new one on its leg. "This is good. Now he has a friend." She turned to the other stuffed animals and pointed to her new one. "Everyone, this is Gang. Be nice to him, okay?"_

_Rong watched her lower the arm slowly, and then wipe her eyes._

"_Go away. I want to be alone."_

_Rong stood in her place. "Mistress, why are you crying?"_

"_Leave."_

"_Why are you crying?"_

_She turned to her furiously. "Why do you care?"_

"_Because you are my reason for living. You are the only thing I care about."_

* * *

_More than a year later, Rong arrived at Tao Castle to do her duty by watching over Pin-Mei. After hearing she had almost drowned, spent a night in the rain, and was attacked by a dog, she cursed herself for having to deal with the family obligations that had kept her at home._

_She sprinted outside to see her sitting with a boy who seemed to be about two years older than her. A small basket of milk bottles was between them._

"_Niisama, can I have one?"_

"_No. These are mine."_

"_But I want one too!"_

_He took a sip. "Well, that's just too bad. I brought these out here. Go inside and get your own." The bottle was now empty, and he took another one from the basket._

_A hard blow came to his head. As he grabbed it in pain, the bottle was taken from his hand. He looked up to see Rong looking pissed, milk bottle in hand._

"_A host should treat his guests with a lot more kindness. He shouldn't be selfish and not give her what she wants." She walked over to hand the bottle to Pin-Mei. "Here La-,"_

"_Niisama!" She stood up and ran over to him. Not knowing what else to do, she started rubbing his head. "Are you hurt? I'm sorry, Niisama! I didn't think she'd do something like that!" She glared at Rong. "How could you? Niisama is really important to me, Rong! Don't do that stuff to him!" She turned back to Ren. "Niisama, are you okay?"_

_He pushed her away. "Yeah, yeah, just stop it. You're messing up my hair." He hadn't even given a slight reaction to his future fiancée's words, as if he already knew that, or that it was old news._

"_Hehe, okay." She smiled._

_Rong just stared at them. Pin-Mei almost never smiled for her. Now she was smiling for this…this STRANGER. This person seemed to barely care about her existence, and she was infatuated with him. She had shown Pin-Mei kindness for over two years, and she had never gotten that reaction. She clenched her fist._

"_FINE, I'LL JUST GO BACK HOME!"_

_She threw the bottle at the ground. It shattered and glass flew everywhere. A large piece flew by Pin-Mei's cheek and cut it, drawing blood. She whimpered and put her hand over it. Rong's eyes widened as she realized what she had done._

"_Ow…" Pin-Mei whined still clutching her cheek._

"_Milady, I-" But the boy cut her off._

"_Let me see," Ren said in a commanding voice, not one hint of a caring attitude. She obediently removed her hand. When she saw the blood, she screamed and began shaking. "Stop it or I can't see, brat." She couldn't stop trembling, but cooperated enough to let him look at it. "It's just a scratch. You're so high maintenance." He stood up and took her wrist. "Come on. Let's put something on it so you'll stop freaking out."_

_She smiled again. "Thank you Niisama."_

"_Just come on." He pulled her inside. _

_Rong could have sworn he glared at her before going in the house._

_That night, Rong slipped into Pin-Mei's room, only to find that she wasn't there. She panicked and started searching all the rooms on the floor. Finally, she turned to Ren's room. She had been told not to go in there, but she felt that she had a justifiable reason to disobey that order. Slowly and carefully, so she wouldn't make a lot of noise, she turned the doorknob and looked inside the room. She covered her mouth in order to muffle a gasp._

_Pin-Mei was in Ren's bed, snuggled close to him, his arm around her, and a content look on her face._

"_Niisama…" she murmured in her sleep. He stirred at this, clenching his fist and squeezing his eyes shut. His arm curled, as if he were stretching or flexing, and inadvertently pulled her closer to him._

_Again, she was finding comfort in this boy she had just met. She was being tossed aside, like she wasn't needed. _

'_Lady Pin-Mei…what is so special about this boy? He hates you.'_

_Rong shut the door and went back to her room._

_After breakfast the next morning, Rong cornered Ren while Pin-Mei was being bathed._

"_Stay away from Lady Pin-Mei," she said in a low voice. Her intention had been to scare him into leaving her alone, but he just stared at her with his sharp yellow eyes._

"_I do, but she comes and finds me. Nothing I can do about it. I'd be thankful if she just left me alone. What makes you think I want her around anyway? She's a crybaby. She's always smiling and giggling, and the sound is so goddamn annoying. She follows me everywhere I go. She even waits outside of the bathroom for me. I'd be oh so grateful if you'd take her off my hands."_

_Rong stared at him. He was so ungrateful for her master's company. She wanted that attention so much, and it was being wasted on this pigheaded jerk. Unable to contain her anger, she slapped him._

"_You little bastard!" she cried. "How can you be so ungrateful for Lady Pin-Mei's company? Even worse, she's happy around you, but you hate her. You have no idea how lucky you are. You know who you remind me of? You remind me of her, except so much worse. You're so coldhearted it makes me sick!"_

_He turned to her apathetically. "When did I say I hated her?"_

_She knew that he hadn't. "You act like it! She crawls into your bed at night just to be closer to you, and you don't even care!"_

_He gave her another hard stare. "Think what you want, you little bitch," he said, returning the favor of being called a bastard._

_She gritted her teeth and slammed her fist into the wall. "I'm not giving her to you!" She towered over him, almost eight inches taller. After a moment, she smirked. "I'll concede when you're taller than me – like that'll ever happen." She laughed, and then patted his head. "Aww, Renny's so cute."_

_Ren's eye twitched and he clenched his fist. He was a little short for his age, but luckily, so was his little shadow, so it hadn't bothered him since he had someone smaller than him around. Now this…towering monster was picking on him. Was he going to take it? Hell no._

_He punched her in the stomach as hard as he could. She fell on her hands and knees, the wind having been knocked out of her. He scoffed at her and walked away, his arms folded across his chest. She looked up at him._

"_I'll get you, I swear…"_

_He stopped and turned around._

"_Don't be all pissy with me because Pin-Mei seems to like being around me. I probably understand her a lot more than you do."_

_Rong's eyes were wide as he kept walking away._

* * *

"_Rong, is it December yet?" Pin-Mei asked._

"_Look at the calendar. What month is it?"_

"…_September."_

"_Is that December?"_

"…_No."_

"_There's your answer."_

_Pin-Mei sulked and looked at the floor. Ling came up behind her and touched her shoulders._

"_Rong, don't snap at Lady Pin-Mei! She's just excited! She hasn't seen Lord Ren in ten years! Don't get cranky just because you don't like him."_

_Pin-Mei stopped and looked up at her with a hurt expression. "Rong…you don't like Ren?"_

_Rong looked at her face and instantly felt sorry for her actions. She was almost nineteen, she should be able to put on a smile and wish her luck, even if she'd rather push her fiancé off a cliff._

"_Yeah, because his name begins with R. It bugs me. Only one R person can be in your life."_

_Pin-Mei looked at the floor again. Rong rushed over and patted her head._

"_Jeez, I'm kidding. Don't be so serious, Milady. I'm happy for you."_

_She smiled. "Thank you, Rong." Then she looked as if she had realized something. "I need to buy him a present!"_

_Rong frowned. "You have plenty of time for that. You don't need to buy him one now."_

_Pin-Mei shook her head furiously. "I have to do it now or else I'll forget." Her face twisted in thought. "Ooooh!" She turned to Ling and Shu. "What should I get him?"_

_The three girls thought for a moment. Rong tapped her foot on the ground, not wishing to take part in the brainstorming session._

"_A cow!" Ling said excitedly._

"_Um…a book?" Shu suggested quietly._

"_A clock with some scissors…" Rong muttered._

_Pin-Mei looked at the ceiling. "…A new dinnerware set?" They looked at her. Her face burned red. "I don't know! I don't remember him ever saying things he liked or didn't like." She thought a little more. "Oh I know what he didn't like!"_

"_What?"_

"_He didn't like..." she slowed down as she said it. "Annoying little brats like me…" She sulked in the corner._

_Rong cracked her knuckles. "Hopefully he's grown a pair and is at least a little more mature."_

"_Ooh! Rong's mad!"_

"_Um…I'm worried she'll get violent with Lord Ren again."_

_Ling and Shu hadn't been in Pin-Mei's service at the time, but when Zhang had revealed Ren and Pin-Mei's engagement, Rong had wasted no time ranting on and on about him to them. They might as well have been there, they knew so much._

_Pin-Mei's sulking grew. Rong went over to her._

"_Come on, Milady. We'll go and get something. Just don't sulk anymore, alright?"_

_Pin-Mei sprang up, a bright smile on her face._

"_YAY!" _

_She grabbed a small pouch of money from her dresser, which housed a picture of her and Ren as children. He had his head turned away from the camera, his arms crossed, and looking very annoyed. Pin-Mei was hugging him around the waist, a blush and a smile on her face. Rong watched her as she admired it, her eyes shining._

"_Come on. The stores will close soon."_

"_Yeah okay." Pin-Mei turned to go, but then went over to her telephone._

"_What are you doing?"_

_She dialed a number and turned to them._

"_I'm calling Ran. I want to get Ren's measurements and stuff in case I end up getting him clothes." She was silent for a moment. "Hehe. It's ringing."_

"_Hello?"_

_She took a breath to speak but stopped._

"_Hello?"_

_It was a boy's voice. A teenaged boy's voice. There weren't many of those at Tao Castle the last time she was there. That left only one possibility._

_Ling looked at her with a tilted head. "Are they not home?"_

_Pin-Mei turned around to face them. Her face was beet red. _

"_What is it, Lady Pin-Mei?"_

_She didn't answer, but only shifted her eyes toward the receiver as the voice came again._

"_Damn crank calls. GOODBYE."_

_The dial tone sounded. Pin-Mei took the phone away from her ear and stared at it. She turned her head to the three maid servants._

"_I think Ren answered the phone."_

_Ling and Shu's eyes widened. They shrieked and ran over to her, each grabbing a hand._

"_What did he sound like?" they cried._

"_He was deep, but not too deep. Not too high, either. The tone of his voice was exactly the same, though!" She laughed._

"_Wow! Love at first listen!"_

"_Um…I guess you'll find out if it really was him when you go visit him for his birthday."_

_They shrieked again and jumped up and down. Then Pin-Mei suddenly stopped._

"_PRESENT!" she cried and ran out of the room. The three remaining girls stared after._

"_But she didn't get the measurements!"_

"_Um…how will she know what size he needs?"_

_Rong unfolded her arms and heaved a heavy sigh. "I'll try on the shirts. If he's grown at all, my size shouldn't be too far off from his. Come on."_

_She dragged them out. She just wanted to get this over with. _

* * *

Rong ran through Xu/Fan Castle's massive front door. The others followed her. She glanced at the floor and noticed some new footprints on the otherwise immaculate tile.

"Lord Ren must have already been here," she said aloud so they could hear her. "Let's just hope that nothing bad has happened yet. There's no telling how low Suo and Kai will stoop in order to get what they want."

Jun looked worried. "Do you think he's alright?"

"I can't say for certain. Although I had full knowledge of the plan, I have no idea how they're going to use those two." She eyed Manta. "It would be best if you looked out for shorty over there. He's an easy target." He pouted.

"Don't worry about him," Yoh said. "I'll look out for him." He smiled.

"Yoh-kun…"

"Okay, I hate to break up this tender moment, but if we don't get there fast, those two may be dead by the time we arrive."

"Oi lady, you don't need to be so pessimistic," HoroHoro said with narrowed eyes.

Rong turned away from him. "I'm not pessimistic, I just know Suo's ways. She'll kill one or both of them as she sees fit. I've had to watch Lady Pin-Mei suffer under her tyranny for twelve years – far too long. I've waited for this day, when I can get my hands on Fan Suo and Fan Kai…"

Her head drooped slightly.

"But Anna made me realize that revenge on her behalf isn't my responsibility. It's Ren's now. And it seems as though he's accepted that responsibility. As much as I hate to admit it, he's a lot stronger than I am."

"Derr," HoroHoro said. Anna punched him, and he crippled to the ground.

Rong's head drooped a little more. "Maybe I thought it was my job to be her mother. That's why I felt so threatened by him. All the same, she sent for the three of us to help her when she could have just used the servants there." She raised her head. "I know now that it was stupid and cruel of me to hold such a grudge against him, one that I don't think he even knew existed. He was just being himself, and caring about her like she wanted. How can I deny her that? Even though I was supposed to protect her, I was hurting her. That goes against the law of the Wei family."

Yoh cocked his head. "'Law of the Wei family?'"

Rong gave a slight glance, then bowed her head again. "Look at my back."

They did and saw "Xu Pin-Mei" written in large characters in a circle in the center of her back. "Wei Rong" was written over and over around the circumference of it.

"What does it mean?" Manta asked.

"This seal was carved into me the moment Lady Pin-Mei was born. What it means is that my world revolves around her, and it does. Everything I've done up until now has had some sort of tie to her. This might be the last time I have to defend her. If I die, as long as she's safe, I'll have no regrets."

"Wow, the psycho has a soft side."

"Shut up blue boy or I'll kill you." She turned to them. "The basement is most likely where they're keeping Lady Pin-Mei. Lord Ren is probably there also. It's this way. Come on!"

She began running down the steep staircase, occasionally just jumping and skipping many steps in order to keep from tripping. Her mind raced as she saw the light of the room in the distance.

"There are a couple things you need to watch out for," she called back to the group. "One is Suo's ability to curse using tags. She can control, she can kill, and she can disease the healthy, among other things. She also uses illusions. Her specialty in that area is dream manipulation. She can take any past event the victim has lived through and alter it to fit her needs. There's almost no doubt in my mind that she has taken advantage of the attempted rape that tore the Lord and Lady apart. That's going to make things ugly.

"Her son Kai is unfortunately a lost cause. Suo even manipulated her flesh and blood to carry out her plans. She convinced him that it was Lady Pin-Mei's fault that Lady Hua died, and he's been in a rage ever since. She was his world. He looked up to her. Losing her killed him inside, and that's where his madness began."

The light was getting closer. They were almost there.

"Everyone, get ready." She skidded into the room.

Rong froze. Her eyes widened. She echoed Ren's scream.

"**LADY PIN-MEI!"**


	40. Beautiful Goodbye

This is the chapter you've been waiting for. Or at least, I think you have. The results of the battle between Pin-Mei and herself; the one who loved Ren and the one who wants him dead.

Yes, this chapter has two titles. I couldn't choose. Each are inspired by songs that helped me write this chapter, as well as Passion (After the Battle Mix). "Beautiful Goodbye" by Amanda Marshall and "She's All I Ever Had" by Ricky Martin (yeah, I don't like him either, but the song is beautiful).

I was a little iffy about twisting the history of Ren's parents for the sake of the story, but owell. It's one small detail. Shouldn't ruin it for you. If it does…then…just wow.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty: Beautiful Goodbye/She's All I Ever Had**

* * *

The others came in behind her and saw the scream-worthy scene. After more cries, they started rushing to the couple. Rong put her arm up to block them.

"No…Let them be alone." Her voice began shaking. "If she dies, I want Ren to be the last one she sees. Him and him alone." As the group stopped, she lowered her arm and watched the horrific scene unfolding before them.

"**PIN-MEI!"**

Ren was frozen as he watched Pin-Mei thrust the sword into the center of her chest, through the curse seal. She stood there for a moment, seemingly stunned by her own action. Then blood began pouring out of her mouth and onto the floor. She looked at him with tired eyes and grinned, then ripped the sword out and tossed it behind her. He got up and ran to catch her as she began to fall to the ground.

Gently, he held her close to him as he slowly knelt on the cold floor. He cradled her as she looked up at him with half-open eyes. Tears formed at their corners and fell down her face.

"Ren…I'm sorry, Ren…"

It was like he had forgotten the last ten minutes. "What do you mean? What for?"

The tears continued to flow. "I hurt you…I told you I hated you…I lied to you…I made you cry…I told myself that I never wanted to do that again…I'm so sorry Ren…Please forgive me…"

"…It's ok," he said, quietly. He took off his shirt and folded it, then pressed it against the wound in her chest. She let out a weak laugh.

"Watch what you touch there."

Although she was trying to be funny, it only brought back memories of the rape. "Pin-Mei…about that night, I-"

"It's okay…I know you didn't want to…It's not your fault…Don't worry about it…"

She closed her eyes, sighed, and then opened them again.

"But you know…if you hadn't been cursed and you had wanted that, I don't really think…I would have minded…"

His eyes widened. "What…what are you saying?" He shook his head. "No…you're delirious, you don't know what you're saying."

Then she looked at him with eyes he didn't remember seeing before. They were listless, full of longing. He swallowed as she refused to take those eyes off him. Finally, they lowered and stared into space.

"If you say so…" Her face went pink. "No…I meant it." She looked up at him with those eyes again. "I meant it. I really did… I wish I had that chance again. Because I love you so much, Ren…"

He stared down at her. "Pin-Mei…"

Silence. He pulled her even tighter to him, pressing his shirt harder against her bleeding chest.

_I can't let her die…No I WON'T let her die!_

"Ren…do you have the ring with you?" she asked suddenly.

He nodded and quickly took the ring from his shirt, then held it so she could see it. "It's right here."

She lifted her left hand. "Can I have it back?"

A tiny smile appeared on his face. "Of course." He took her hand and gently slipped the right back into its rightful place. After they both admired it, he kissed her hand and held it.

She coughed. More blood came out. Gasping, she leaned her head against his chest, and then reached up to touch the skin.

"I love you…" she whispered.

He clutched her tighter. "I love you too…more than you'll ever know."

Another small laugh. "Look at what I've done to you…you're spewing out all this mushy stuff now. You would never have said something like that before…"

He kissed her forehead. "That's just how powerful you are."

She smiled. "Like I said…you're a hopeless romantic now…sorry…"

She began coughing again, this time with a wheeze. Ren looked down at her. This wasn't happening…

A few tears fell on her face. She looked up to see more falling from his eyes, which had softened in a way she had never seen. Then she put on the best smile she could.

"Please don't cry, Ren…I wanted this…I did this…for you…I wanted you…to be safe…"

"You're such an idiot! I told you that being selfless never solves anything!"

She chuckled. "Looks like this time it did…If I didn't…then I would have killed you…and I want you to live…I want you to be happy…I want you…to find someone else who can make you smile…I want you to be happy…if you are…then I can rest in peace…but I'll always watch over you…"

His eyes widened. "Don't talk like that…There isn't anyone else…" He was panicking. He had to do something, anything to keep her talking, to keep her alive. "Don't you remember when we were little? When you wanted to sleep in my bed because your father wouldn't let you in? And I let you? And I even put my arm around you? It's because I understood your pain, and you understood mine…No one else can do that, Pin-Mei, only you can! It would be impossible to find anyone who could make me feel the way you do. So don't talk about someone else…because…because I…I NEED YOU! You can't just stroll into my life and then waltz right back out whenever you want to!…So you're not leaving…I won't let you!"

She was still looking up at him, tears rolling down, her eyes dulling. Another small smile surfaced.

"I'd ask you to kiss me…but I don't think you want to taste all the blood…"

Without hesitation, he leaned over to softly place his lips on hers. Her eyes widened for a moment, then went back to their half-closed state, a happy light in them.

The kiss was just like all their others, as if nothing was wrong, as if they were about to go to sleep in Ren's bed, and they were having a last-minute cuddling session. Ren didn't hold back. His heart wouldn't allow him to. She needed to know. She needed to know what she meant to him, and kissing her was the only way he could show her right then.

As they came to the ending kiss, she held his face steady with the little strength she could muster. He felt like there was a warm energy flowing from her mouth to his. Whether it was real or he was imagining it, he didn't know. She smiled as she pulled away from him.

"I…gave it back to you…"

"Gave what back?"

"…The furyoku…I stole…from you…and mine also…I won't…be needing it…"

"Stop talking like that…"

She touched his cheek again, caressing it with her thumb. He closed his eyes and placed his hand over it, as if to savor the feeling. They shot open as he heard her cough again.

She had turned away from him, allowing the blood that left her body to fall to the floor instead of on him. He touched her chin to bring her face back into his view. She was taking heavy breaths, almost gasping. Again, she tried to smile.

"I love you…" she whispered. "You…were the first person…to tell me…they loved me…You…were the first person who…made me feel…important…n…needed…loved…happy…like…I can…do anything…Even after…seeing…your past self I…believe…with all my heart…that you're…the kindest person…I've ever met…"

"Pin-Mei…Stop it…don't talk anymore…we have to get you home…"

Her eyes smiled. "Why…do people think…that if a dying person…doesn't talk that they'll…live…?"

"YOU'RE NOT DYING!" he screamed at her.

"I'm sorry…Ren…I'm…so…sorry…"

Her hand had slipped from his cheek, and she mustered all of her strength to put it back and stroke him again. She closed her eyes, then opened them slightly.

"Please…one more…kiss…?

"Pin-Mei…I know I didn't say this enough…but I love you! I love you…I always will…no matter what happens…I promise I'll always love you!" The tears were pouring down his face. "I can't do this…don't do this to me Pin-Mei…you can't…you just can't…you…" He stopped as her finger reached up to brush away some of his tears.

"I…wanted so badly…to help you…revive…your family…to…have sons who…could carry on…the Tao name…I wanted…so badly…to be able…to be called…Tao Pin-Mei…It was…my dream…"

"It'll happen! I swear it will! I'll call you that right now if you'll just stay!" He stroked her hair and her cheek. "Tao Pin-Mei…that's your name now, alright? You're my wife now…and as your husband, I ORDER YOU TO STAY!"

_I'm so sorry Ren…_

She smiled. "Alright…darling…" He didn't correct her. "Don't we…have…to kiss?"

"Of course…"

He leaned over again. "...I love you."

"I…I know…I love you…too…always…and…forever…"

He kissed her again. He savored it. In his mind, it would always be like this. Kissing her whenever he wanted to, helping him feel complete. It gave him the warm happy feeling that used to be a void only a few months before.

When he pulled away from her, her head didn't support itself. It tilted to the side, towards the ground. Her lips couldn't even mold to fit his. The hand that had been on his cheek slipped under his that was holding it, not able to grasp him anymore. He slowly opened his eyes, then they became wide in horror.

Her eyes were closed, a serene smile on her face.

"_I am honored, Lord Ren."_

"Pin-Mei?"

"_Thank you for the clips – they're beautiful! I'll wear them always!"_

"Pin-Mei…?" He shook her; there was no response.

"_Can I sleep with you tonight?"_

"PIN-MEI?"

"_Will you marry me?" "Yes."_

"PIN-MEI!"he screamed at her.

His breathing staggered as he surveyed her body. No movement whatsoever. He put his ear to her chest. Nothing. He checked her pulse. No rhythm. He stared at her, shaking his head.

"No…no…no…" he whispered. "I told you that you couldn't leave…you're supposed to listen to me…You were supposed to listen!"

"_I love butterflies because they make me think of you!"_

He looked at her again.

"_Niisama is very important to me!"_

"This isn't happening…This isn't fucking happening…"

"_I couldn't sleep without you there…"_

"She can't die…she can't…she…she's too young…"

"_REN! It's been ten minutes and I haven't dropped the Kwan Dao! I rock!"_

"No way…she's faking it…right…? Pin-Mei…"

"_I love you."_

"Pin-Mei!"

"_I love you Ren, I love you so much…"_

He clutched her body tightly, placing his head on top of hers, the tears pouring out of him like a flood of anguish.

"**PIN-MEI!"**

He kept screaming as everyone watched. But he didn't care. He didn't even notice. His "wife" had just died in front of him. She was gone. There was no way to bring her back. He would never hear her voice, her laugh, he would never see her smile ever again. There was not a single breath left in her.

He covered her lips again, trying to get some air into her, get her breathing again, trying to give her a chance at life. It wouldn't work. Still, he refused to let go of her body; to let go of the hope that she would somehow start breathing again. He held her limp hand, hoping that she would squeeze back. She didn't.

His body was shaking. This was so much like his dream. She hated him, then came to her senses, now she was dead. He tried to wake himself up, only to come to the horrific realization that this was real. She was really gone. She had just kissed him a few minutes ago. Now she was gone.

"I love you…"

More of his tears fell on her face. The sadness was building, like a horrible pressure that would make him explode.

"No…no…"

He threw his head back and then let out one last horrible and almost inhuman cry.

As it faded and he looked down at her motionless body again, he gritted his teeth as he heard Suo's evil laugh from across the room.

"Not what I had in mind, but it's one way to get things done. We were going to kill her anyway - we need that furyoku after all - but she was foolish enough to do it on her own. Ah well, just makes it easier for us."

Ren laid Pin-Mei's body on the ground and stared down at it. Her bangs were damp with sweat, pieces of her hair sticking to her face. The sight of her corpse shouldn't have bothered him as much as it did. It wasn't like he had never seen one before. No, he'd seen hundreds, if not thousands, in his lifetime. But the sight of hers affected him more than the first he had ever seen. An image of her with cold, purple skin and stitched arms flashed in his mind. For once, the thought was enough to make him sick.

"But there's no need to be sad. Xu Pin-Mei was just a copy of Fan Hua anyhow. She didn't have her own personality, only my dear daughter's. You could say that you were in love with Hua and not some girl named Pin-Mei. That's the only reason why we let her live all these years – so her soul could be used to bring Hua back.

"From birth we bred her to be just like her mother, wearing only navy blue, wearing her hair in twintails and eventually braids. She was given the facial cream that Hua used daily in order to keep her skin soft, as well as contacts to make her eyes blue, which I understand she never wore around you, as per Zhang's command. We made her learn the DaDao, her mother's weapon of choice. We did our best to make her believe she was lactose intolerant, but thanks to you, that failed. However, you made up for it. Hua was afraid of water, having almost drowned at a young age. We didn't know how to make Pin-Mei have that same fear without killing her, but luckily, your inattention to her allowed her to fall into a pond, almost drowning, and thus making her afraid of water.

"Her engagement to you was an unfortunate obstacle. I had planned on telling your parents that the engagement was null and void, but then Zhang somehow decided to go ahead with it behind my back. Despite wasting away in his room with concubines for almost 14 years, he took her to your house ten years ago. He claimed that Hua had come to him in a dream and told him to take her. Then, he kept finding excuses not to bring her over again. Maybe he didn't want to let go of someone who reminded him of my beautiful daughter…

"But again, Hua allegedly intervened and told him to do as she had wanted him to. That was a year ago. At the New Year celebration of that year, Zhang came out of his room and gave Pin-Mei two new sets of clothes, one red and one purple; a red envelope as always, and a framed picture of when the two of you were last together. As if following the festival's theme of "rebirth", Zhang completely changed. He dismissed every courtesan in the castle and decided to spend more time with his daughter. He had looked so old before, but he regained his youth, despite being in his thirties. On her fourteenth birthday, he told her of the engagement between the two of you.

"So many people worked so hard so that the two of you could be together. However, we could not let that happen. You see, we were going to kill Pin-Mei anyway, so having a fiancé would cause trouble. So when you two went to Tokyo, we hired the Fork-Ids syndicate to capture her and bring her back here to us. When you slaughtered them, we tried to same technique in London, but again, it failed. We were getting worried that she would be at your house forever, as Zhang had not told anyone when, if ever, they were returning.

"But then we overheard the maid servants discussing something. I cornered the weakest and most pathetic of the three and threatened her until she revealed the party plans. That's when our chance came. The plan was simple: Put you under a curse and have you rape Pin-Mei. This would cause a scandal, and the engagement would HAVE to be broken. After all, who would approve of a marriage in which the husband had a history of raping his future wife? It worked, needless to say, although, sadly, you didn't actually go through with it, so Pin-Mei wasn't as broken as we had hoped she would be. In fact, she was stronger.

"After she tried to run back to your house, we captured her and manipulated her memory, making her think you had actually raped her. The results were stunning. The screaming, the crying, the flinching…it was beautiful. Not only that, but we sent her to go meet your former self."

Ren's eyes widened.

"She was horrified. In the end, you killed her, and the illusion was so strong that she coughed up blood in her sleep. She was so easy to mold then that it was comical. All we had to do then was wait for you. And here we are.

"Oh, that's right. You don't know how Hua knows your family. About thirty-one years ago, my first daughter, Yan, was murdered by the people of the nearby town. She was supposed to marry your father. Of course, after she was killed, the engagement plans were useless. Your grandparents refused to wait for me to bear another child, and thus he married your mother instead."

She laughed. "You understand now, Tao Ren? You've lost. You've failed. Pin-Mei is dead. Her soul will be used to revive Hua, and then she will kill you and we will live happily ever after. What an embarrassing loss for the Tao family. You couldn't even protect someone you claimed to "love". How very shameful."

Everyone was surprised when Ren chuckled.

"What the hell would you know about shame?"

She glared at him. "What?"

"You manipulated those around you to accomplish your own selfish goals. You killed your son-in-law. You killed three servants. Worst of all, you watched your own granddaughter DIE. You don't care about your daughter's well being. All you want are her powers. If you loved Hua at all, you would have loved Pin-Mei and treated her as if she was your daughter, not abuse her and make her life hell."

Kai's eyes narrowed. "Watch it, boy. You're in our territory, and without a guide. You have no chance of winning."

Ren stood up, his feet firmly planted. He brought his right hand to his face to wipe away the last of the tears he had cried over the girl who now slept eternally on the ground. After wiping them, he whipped his arm out to the side, Houraiken in his hand.

"Wrong."

They all stared at him. He turned around, his eyes wild with rage.

HoroHoro froze. "Those eyes…"

Yoh looked at him. "What?"

"I haven't seen those eyes since…"

"_Unforgivable…THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY I'M GOING TO FORGIVE YOU!"_

"…since we fought Hao…He had those same demonic eyes."

Ren grinned menacingly at Suo and Kai.

"I haven't felt this sort of powerful rage in a loooong time. It's different from when I killed that syndicate scum. I can control this power. Pin-Mei helped me keep my rage in check because it was a little hard to be mad at an innocent brat like her. But because you were so determined to take her away from me, and piss me off like this…"

His eyes flashed as every hint of kindness left them.

"**I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"**


	41. Mortis

Did I…just really kill off my own OC? … I have such a sick mind. Poor Ren. I was surprised at the reaction to Pin-Mei's death. I'm happy that she was embraced by you guys. Makes an author feel good. The utter show of emotion was surprising also. I feel blessed…and I probably sound like a ninny so I'll stop.

One part I hate is that now I don't whether to refer to Pin-Mei as his fiancée or his wife. Ah well, we'll use both…since you guys know they can't really be married since there wasn't any sort of ceremony or anything. Ren will call her his wife because of that "Tao Pin-Mei" scene (which is my fave part btw), and everyone else will call her his fiancée. Sorry if you get confused. I just squirm every time he calls Pin-Mei his wife. Makes them sound old.

**Notes: Spoilers from eps 59-60. You get a cookie if you can guess what it is before we get to it.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-One: Mortis**

* * *

Rong stared at Ren. His arms, hands, and chest were covered in the blood of his beloved. His smile was malicious, his eyes a reflection of the rage, pain, and sadness that were swirling around inside of him. Both were on the brink of psychotic.

Rong lowered her eyes. "Is Lord Ren able to control his emotions?"

The group looked at her. "What?"

"He said he can control the power he has now, but is he able to have all that rage inside of him and still fight without a clouded mind? If he can't, then he'll be joining Lady Pin-Mei soon."

Jun ran up to her. "Why? What's going to happen to Ren?"

Rong turned to her. "They will use that anger against him. They're masters of manipulation, remember? They can put so much doubt in his mind that he'll end up destroying himself. If that happens, our chances are looking pretty bleak."

"Then let's go help him!" HoroHoro cried and began running toward his friend. Rong slapped him in the chest to stop him.

"If I know anything at all about Lord Ren, it's that he wouldn't allow it. You'll just be a casualty in the crossfire." Her eyes shifted to Pin-Mei's lifeless body. "But we need to get Lady Pin-Mei out of there. I won't let that one glimmer of hope vanish from Lord Ren's eyes."

Jun looked at her, confused. "Glimmer of hope?"

She nodded. "Before he wiped away the last of his tears, I saw a light in the corners of his eyes. Even if it's in vain, he's hoping that she'll somehow come back." Her eyes narrowed. "As long as he believes that, I'll do everything I can to make that hope become a reality."

Yoh walked up to her and smiled. "You've become attached to him pretty quickly."

She shot him a glare. "You better not have meant that the way it sounded."

"Hehehe, no. I just mean that you're already so loyal to him."

A slight blush appeared on her face, but then quickly disappeared as she looked back at her master's body.

"I am bound to Lord Ren because he is Lady Pin-Mei's first and only love. She loved him enough to _die_ for him. I won't let her sacrifice be in vain. I will help him any way that I can. But first…" Her eyes shifted between the two lovers in front of her. "I have to figure out how I'm going to get in there and get Milady's body away from harm."

About thirty feet away, Ren was grasping Houraiken tightly, his own blood running down the hilt. Suo sneered at him.

"What a pathetic human being," she said. "He believes he can beat you with force alone. His anger will be his downfall. You should have no problem with him, dear."

Kai grinned darkly. "Of course not. He's weak. He's lost himself over Pin-Mei. He can't think straight right now."

His mother nodded. "So go kill him, or distract him at the very least. I need time to prepare the ritual."

"Certainly, mother." He chose a sword from the rack next to him.

"Mistress, what should I do?"

Suo turned to her right. "Oh, Ma Ying."

Ren glared at the spirit. "MA YING YOU TRAITOROUS BITCH!" he shouted over. "HOW COULD YOU ALLOW SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO HAPPEN TO PIN-MEI? I CHOSE YOU BECAUSE I THOUGHT THAT YOU'D BE LOYAL TO HER, NOT STAB HER IN THE FUCKING BACK!"

She looked at him, her eyes sad and fearful. "Master Ren, you don't understand! I did love Pin-Mei, but some things were more important to me…"

"You bitch…" he growled.

Suo turned to her. "Thank you for offering your services to us, Ma Ying Taphan. You will help us greatly…"

She removed a tag from her sleeve and slapped it on Ma Ying's forehead. She froze, then glowed before exploding. Suo gathered the spirit particles in her fan and then waved them to the ground, where a fire appeared.

Rong's eyes widened. "Ma Ying was…extinguished…"

Suo cackled with delight. "She was so foolish! I told her that she would be able to complete her revenge if she helped us, and she BELIEVED me! After all these years of watching her master deal with me, she actually thought that I would help her! It's too good! So rich!"

Ren stared at the ground, his fist clenched even tighter. "How many more people do you have to kill before you're satisfied?"

He let out a cry and charged at them. Kai smirked as he headed toward him. Suddenly, Ren was stopped in his tracks. Everyone watched with wide eyes. Even Suo raised her eyebrows.

Rong had stepped in, her nine-sectioned chain whip wrapped around Houraiken. Ren's eyes flared at her.

"Rong, let go - NOW."

"Forgive me, Lord Ren, but I cannot do that. The way you are now, this is a losing battle. I know what I'm asking for seems impossible, but please, calm down. You can't fight with a mind this clouded. You're doomed to lose!"

He shook with anger. "Calm down? You want me to CALM DOWN? DID YOU SEE WHAT JUST HAPPENED? MY WIFE IS DEAD! PIN-MEI IS DEAD! IF YOU THINK I'M GOING TO SHOW THESE DIPSHITS ANY MERCY, YOU'RE WRONG! **DEAD WRONG!**"

She lowered her head until her bangs covered her eyes.

"Milord…I…I know that Lady Pin-Mei is gone, and I know that you feel as if something inside of you has died…and I'm sorry to say something so selfish…but you're not the only one who misses her…"

"_This is perfect! Rong, I couldn't have done this without you! He's going to love these, thank you!" She smiled. "You're always there to help me, no matter what. Thank you."_

She lifted her eyes to show him the tears that had begun to fall. "I do too…and so do they…" She looked over at Yoh, Anna, Jun, Manta, and HoroHoro.

He followed her eyes. His eyes widened.

"Manta…"

"_Doll!" She picked him up and cuddled him. "I'm NOT A DOLL! Put me down!"_

"HoroHoro…"

"_Squeee! Ice! Do it again! Make ice again!" "I've done it twenty times already! Kororo's tired!"_

"Anna…"

"…_Is that even humanly possible?" "You think I'm lying to you?" "Um…no…but…um…" Her face went completely red. "It's just weird to think about…especially with him."_

"Neesan…"

"_Would he use this?" She held up a Bowflex catalogue and pointed to one of the machines. Jun studied it. "I suppose he would. I don't see why he wouldn't." "How do I know which one to buy? There's a lot of them…" "I'm not quite sure…I don't know much about these things either." Pin-Mei looked at the catalogue again. "I'm getting this one." She pointed to it. "That's the most expensive one!" "But that means it's good, right?"_

"Yoh…"

"_So what does this thing do again?" "You take this black thing, called a record, and place it here, then put the pin on it. Then you put on the headphones and the music starts playing." "Wooooah…I've never seen one of these before!" She put the headphones on. "I can hear singing!" "Yeah, isn't Bob great? Hehehe."_

"They're suffering too…We know our pain is nothing compared to yours…but please…don't make her sacrifice be in vain. Don't rush in there with anger as your only weapon. If you do, they'll kill you. We'll think of something, just don't let yourself die."

He hid his eyes from her.

"I'm not saying that she wouldn't want you to kill those two. She wasn't usually a person for revenge, and even though she would never say it out loud, I'd seen it in her eyes once or twice. She wanted them dead. You can do what you want with them, but you need to have a plan."

As they both straightened, each releasing their weapons, Rong looked at Ren's head. She couldn't see over it. She smirked at herself and shook her head. He looked at her.

"What?"

After another small chuckle, she went to walk past him.

"You're finally taller than me. Took you long enough." _She really is yours now. I give up._

"PAY ATTENTION, FOOLS!"

They both looked at Kai, who was now holding Pin-Mei's body. He smirked and pressed a talisman to her forehead. Her spirit rose from it and he dropped the body to the ground.

"How very careless, Tao Ren," Suo said. "You were so consumed with anger that you didn't even notice him retrieving the body." She looked over to the fire, which now contained a small pile of female bodies. "We have all the ingredients we need. I will begin the ritual."

Ren's eyes widened. "NO!" He rushed at them.

"Milord, wait!"

It was too late. Ren had snapped. Again.

Kai quickly wrapped the spirit in restriction beads to keep her tangible and threw her over to Suo's feet. He brandished a sword and met Ren head-on.

"I really think you should listen to the Wei girl. She has already fought with me and may be able to give you some tips," he taunted.

"SHUT UP!"

Ren over souled Houraiken into a Kwan Dao and swung at Kai. He blocked it and gave a quick thrust at his chest. Ren quickly tried to dodge, but the blade grazed his left shoulder. He flinched and grabbed it reflexively.

"YOU'RE WIDE OPEN!" Another thrust, this time at his face.

_Shit!_

At the last moment a chain wrapped around it and tossed it away. Ren looked up to see Rong, Yoh, and HoroHoro standing between him and his adversary.

"Pretty careless of you, Ren. You're usually better than this," HoroHoro said looking back at him and grinning.

"Shut up!" he yelled.

"Just a joke, man. Just a joke."

Yoh looked at Ren. "Hehehe. Don't worry, we came to help. We're not going to let you die, Ren."

"Yoh…"

Rong glanced at him over her shoulder. "It's my duty to protect you and help you reach your goals, Lord Ren. That's what I've been raised to do."

"But you're Pin-Mei's-"

"I am, but I also have to protect the things important to her. When the person I am supposed to protect dies, until I am put to death, I protect the one they loved most. And that's you."

He was silent. She turned her body slightly.

"You seem convinced that there's a way to bring her back, and I'll trust you on that. That's a mission I'll gladly give my life for. I will help you in any way I can." She smiled at him.

"Rong…"

"That being said," she turned to face the Fans again. "What do you want us to do, Milord?"

Ren stared at the floor. _I may have to use it. No. I think I have to. I promised Zhang I wouldn't die…but I don't think it really matters anymore. As long as I kill them. That's all that matters._

"Time," he said. "I need you guys to buy me some time. I have an attack that can kill them, but I need time."

HoroHoro looked at him quizzically. "What sort of-"

"Understood," Rong cut in.

"Hey! I wasn't-"

Rong grabbed him by the shirt. "A good soldier never questions his lord's orders," she said coldly.

He tried in vain to detach her hand from him. "He's not _my_ lord, so I can question him if I want! I _am_ older than him anyways."

She yanked him close to whisper in his ear. "Number one: Age has nothing to do with anything. Lady Pin-Mei was almost five years younger than me, and I followed all of her orders without fail. Number two: Do you mean to tell me that he has never done anything for you that you owe him for? Has he ever helped you in a pinch? Saved your life? Maybe just been a friend?"

The Ainu stared blankly at her. She was right. He had. Ren had almost died because of him. Now here he was, complaining because Ren had asked them to buy him some time so he could get revenge for the death of his fiancée. He realized that he owed him at least that much.

Seeing the revelation on his face, she grinned. "Alright, then." She unhanded him and turned back to Ren. "Just tell us what to do."

Ren nodded. "I'll be in the back of the room. Just make sure I'm not disturbed." He was about to turn to go, when he heard the sound of a body hitting the ground. Slowly, he turned around. He felt like he had just been stabbed.

Kai had picked up Pin-Mei's body and thrown it at him. She was like a rag doll on the floor, her limbs just landing in whatever position they happened to. The wet blood from her chest smudged the floor. Her braids were coming out, and her clothes were disheveled, the rip in the shirt now becoming a little more revealing. He clenched his fist and looked up at him.

Kai smiled at him. "Thank you for letting us borrow the body. We're done with it, so you can have it back." He smirked. "Have fun with it."

Ren clenched his fists as tightly as he could to restrain himself. He stiffly walked over and picked her body up, cradling it once more. Up close, he could see how pale her body was now. Her body was already getting cold. He hated the feeling. Without a word, he turned to walk over to where Jun, Anna, and Manta were. After clutching it once more, he set her down on the ground, resting her against the wall. He stared at her before turning to Jun.

"Watch her for me," he said walking away.

She nodded. "Of course." She looked at Pin-Mei, then saw that Ren's shirt was still in her lap, attached to her clothes by the dried blood. She looked at it sadly. "Pin-Mei…"

Kai chuckled, and Rong whipped her head around to face him.

"You won't be smiling in a few minutes, you bastard." She turned to the other two. "This one's mine. Concentrate on protecting Lord Ren." They nodded and ran after him.

"You'll regret that, Wei Rong," Kai said.

She grinned. "I have a score to settle with you, and I won't regret spilling your blood just as Lady Pin-Mei's was."

They readied their weapons and lunged at each other.

* * *

"Ren!"

He turned to see Yoh and HoroHoro rushing up to him. "Why aren't you two with Rong?"

"She wanted Kai to herself for a while," HoroHoro said.

Ren nodded and looked at the fight before him.

"Okay, do your thing so you can kill these guys!"

"Don't worry, we'll be right here," Yoh said grinning.

Ren went to stand near the back of the room, his eyes hidden behind his bangs.

_I'll kill them for you, Pin-Mei. And if this guy can't help bring you back, I'll come join you._


	42. Inyou no Chigiri

Some people tell me that last chapter didn't affect them as much as the one before. It wasn't really supposed to. If I made every chapter like that, people would get insensitive, and thus other events would not be as effective as they should be. Besides, we have to get Ren away from the whole "she's dead boohoo" stage and move on to the "time to open up a can of whoop-ass" stage. –nods-

This chapter took me a while to write. I kept getting overwhelmed by the rituals. Just thinking about explaining them made my head spin. Even though I've been told I'm pretty decent at writing fight scenes, I don't feel that they're my forte, and I struggle with them. They're not my favorite thing. Why I decided to write a fic with a lot of fighting in it is beyond me. And we still have about 3 ½ fights to go in this arc alone.

**Notes: A Taijitu is what people call a "yinyang". "Yinyang" is the incorrect term for it. A Taijitu is the _balance_ of Yin and Yang. Some people call it a "Tao" because it represents the central principal of Taoism, but that is also incorrect. And it's not Taijutsu. This isn't Naruto, people…**

**The hand seals and stages Ren uses are based on the Kuji-in system. Yes, a lot of them look similar to what you may see in Naruto, but know that they originated in that system first. I mixed the stages up in an order that I thought would be most befitting to the nature of the ritual.**

**I'm sure you've noticed that Ren still talks about Pin-Mei in the present tense. We'll chalk it up to his optimism that she can be revived.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Two: Inyou no Chigiri (Pledge of the Taijitu)**

* * *

Ren stared at the blood on his hands, then looked at his shoulder, which was bleeding minimally. He wiped his hand over it, taking the blood into his hands.

_This should be enough._

He was about to get down on one knee when Suo called from across the room.

"You better work quickly, Tao Ren. Once I complete my ritual, any hope you had of reviving Pin-Mei will be lost. Her soul is being used to complete Hua's body. Once her soul is inside of Hua, there is no way of getting it back. There will be no way to resurrect her. Not that you would know how to anyway." She laughed. "Just give up. I might even let you leave here alive if you choose to now. You can find someone else to carry on your family. Someone who has a decent furyoku level."

Ren was staring at the floor, the new restriction hanging over his head.

"Pin-Mei was a bland, normal girl. A boring, imperfect copy of Hua, alike in almost every aspect sans fighting prowess and beauty. You can find so many more exciting people to love. It's not hard. I'm sure even you, with your poor social skills, can manage it. How she ever fell for a murderer like you is beyond me, but the fact that you loved her back is even more perplexing. Honestly she-,"

"She is nothing like Hua."

"What?"

Ren was still looking at the floor, his fists clenched.

"She isn't a copy. She has her own personality. She likes purple, not navy blue. She hates the DaDao. She isn't afraid of water. She's not all that graceful; in fact she's incredibly clumsy. Her voice sometimes cracks when she sings. She's the worst morning person I've ever met. She likes milk, but she contaminates it with chocolate. She hates sleeping by herself. She's so naïve and innocent that it's clear you never let her out of the house. I've never heard her swear. Her ability to remember things is uncanny. She tries hard not to hate anyone, and she's very forgiving. She cries over every little thing, whether she's happy or sad. She's obsessed with butterflies. And…"

"_What do you want?" _

_She blushed. "Promise you won't think I'm weird?"_

"_Of course."_

"_Umm…I really want..."_

"…she wants twins. A boy and a girl. And for whatever reason…" His head was dipped low so it could hide a small blush. "…she wants to name the boy after me, and wants him to be just like me. She knows that isn't possible. Maybe she was joking. Maybe because she knows what it's like to be treated like a copy. Either way…"

He lifted his flaring eyes again.

"I'm going to take her back. I'll save her and then beat the ritual out of you. She WILL live again.

"On my way here, I decided that I would kill you quickly, just to end this so she and I could go back home. But now, after all that's happened, I've decided that I'm going to do just the opposite. I'm going to make it as slow and painful as possible. I'm going to make you suffer for the ten minutes that she did. I'll make you gasp for air until your last moment of life."

A look of surprise flashed in her eyes, but then she gathered herself. "Oh you'll revive her, will you? Well, you better hurry then, because as I said before, once my ritual has been performed, Pin-Mei's soul will be lost to you forever. You won't even be able to see her spirit."

Ren gritted his teeth. She was right, he had to work fast. All the more reason not to waste any more time. He got down and put his palms a few inches off the ground on either side of him. He inhaled deeply, and then closed his eyes.

_Please let this work…_

He opened his eyes and slapped his palms together.

"Hé tong! CONTRACT!"

A circle of light about thirty feet in diameter traced itself around him. A Taijitu glowed inside of it, then faded. Ren quickly clasped his hands together, his fingers inside.

"Stage one! Awareness!"

Slowly, from the very outside of it and moving in circles toward the center, ancient Chinese characters glowed and appeared on the ground. Yoh and HoroHoro looked back at him. He was chanting the words as they lit up.

"This…is going to take a while, isn't it?" HoroHoro said.

Yoh just smiled. "If it takes so long to prepare, it must really be something. It'll be alright. Ren knows what he's doing."

They watched as the first outer circle was completed. It flashed and what seemed to be a wall of iridescent light rose to the ceiling. Ren separated his hands, and then spread them out in front of him, his thumb and index fingers touching.

"Stage two! Creation!"

Yoh and HoroHoro looked at each other.

"I wonder how many stages there are…" Yoh wondered aloud.

HoroHoro just folded his arms, disgruntled. "There better not be too many more. I mean, we don't know how long Rong is going to hold out." He looked over at her.

* * *

Kai slammed Rong against the wall. She quickly recovered and sidestepped to avoid his thrust. His sword went into the wall, and she took the opportunity to wrap her chained whip around his wrists. She smirked as she yanked him closer to her, dropkicking him when he was close enough. As he hit the ground she retracted her chain and kept it in a ready position.

To her surprise, as he sat up, he was grinning. He wiped his mouth of the blood that had trickled out and licked his finger. He sighed.

"Still not as tasty as hers."

Rong was confused, but then noticed he was looking past her at Pin-Mei. She gritted her teeth. "You sick bastard."

She went after him as he pulled his sword from the wall. With a flick of the wrist, she wrapped her weapon around his.

"Gotcha twice," she declared with another smirk.

He returned the gesture. "Not quite."

"Wha-?"

He gave a tremendous pull and she flew across the room. She landed fifty feet from him, her skin cut up from skidding on the stone floor. As she slowly stood, she unclipped her bracer to reveal a line of small vials. She took one, opened it with her teeth, and poured it on her wounds. She threw it behind her when it was empty and clipped her bracer back on.

Kai chuckled. "Fully equipped as usual. You Wei women never cease to amaze me."

She wiped the blood from her mouth with her fist. "Thanks but I don't need your empty compliments, Kai."

"What happened to 'Lord Kai'?"

She smiled at him. "My allegiance isn't to you; it's to Lady Pin-Mei and Lord Ren, so I really couldn't give a shit about you even if I wanted to. I wish you a slow and painful death."

"Oooh! That's not what a good little servant should say. You need to be punished."

"Awesome. You gonna tell me I've been a bad girl?"

He licked his blade. "Oh yes, and so much more."

Rong looked at him with a disgusted face. "What is it with you and licking things? Creepazoid…"

He shook his head, as if to tell her she didn't understand. "Don't you have a favorite flavor?"

"Yeah, and it's cinnamon – a SPICE. BLOOD and STEEL are NOT SPICES."

He sighed. "You'll never understand…"

She spun her whip with her right hand. "Sorry, but I really don't give a crap." She lashed it out at him.

Kai scoffed at her. "Silly girl. That won't work on me again."

He caught the chains with his bare hand and pulled her towards him again. When she was close enough, he wrapped it around her neck, tugging it tightly. She gagged, and some blood fell from her mouth. He scraped some off with his finger and tasted it. Rong cringed.

He wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Too salty." His sword was suddenly at her throat. "Maybe it'll taste better mixed with that boy's…"

* * *

"Stage Five! Energy!"

Suo frowned as she continued her own ritual on the opposite side of the room.

_He's more than halfway through the nine stages, and I'm less than half done with mine!_

She stared into the fire.

_Pin-Mei's soul hasn't disappeared yet. What could be taking so long? Is it because Ma Ying's soul is already in there?_

She looked up at Ren again, who had moved on to the sixth stage.

_If I don't do something quick, he will finish before me, and it'll be all over! We need a distraction…Perfect. _"Kyonshi!"

From the shadows of the room, hundreds of kyonshi appeared, some armed with guns, some knives, and some just their bare fists. Suo saw them out of the corners of her eyes and beamed.

Yoh and HoroHoro just stared at them.

"Oh…Shit…"

"Come on, HoroHoro! We have to get them!"

"But what about Ren? Won't Rong be mad if we leave him here?"

"He should be fine, at least until we can clear some of these guys out."

They raced until Kai and Rong could be seen clearly.

"Rong!" HoroHoro cried. "Nipopo Punch!"

Seeing the blast of ice heading toward him, Kai jumped out of the way, dropping Rong to the floor. It flew over her, hitting the already cold corpses behind her. The attacker rushed to stand near her, looking around for more enemies.

"You alright?"

She coughed and sat up, removing the chains from around her neck. "Yeah, but getting chocked by my own weapon hurt my pride a little bit."

"You macho chicks and your pride…"

"Don't make me choke you."

Yoh turned and noticed their quarreling. "Hey, concentrate on fighting the kyonshi, not each other!"

Both glared, and then pointed at each other.

"Well if he wasn't such a jerk!"

"If she would stop being so damn macho!"

They stopped and looked behind them, where one large kyonshi was preparing to attack. Both glared at it, and then attacked, quickly toppling it. They exchanged small smirks before running to attack other groups.

Kai looked out from behind a pillar. "Perfect. The fools are so occupied with the kyonshi that they won't notice little old me…"

Remaining in the shadows, he crept closer to where Ren was still chanting, now up to stage eight: Power. Kai could see the eighth ring of characters being near completion. He had to act fast.

He touched a row of coins, a thick piece of leather strewn through their holes to hold them together. Untying the leather, he removed the biggest coins, gold 2001 and 2002 commemorative mints with the pictures of the snake and the horse carved into each respectively. He smiled at them.

"I've been waiting to try these one out."

He stared at Ren, who still had his eyes closed, only about ten characters away from completing the eighth stage. After careful aiming, with a flick of his wrist, he sent the coin flying at him.

* * *

_Almost there…Just one more stage…_

As he was finishing the Power stage, his fingers clasped together with the middle fingers up and pressed together, Ren heard the faint whizzing of approaching projectiles.

_What?_

**SNAP! CRACK!**

"AAAAAGGHHHHH!"

He fell to the floor, landing on his still-intertwined fingers. He screamed again. It hurt so much. His fingers hurt so much…What had happened? He sat up.

_Just one more stage…I can worry about this later. I'll ignore the pain for now._

But as he went to pull his hands apart, he found that he couldn't. He looked at them and nearly choked on his own breath.

His middle fingers were bent in ways they shouldn't be. The rest of his fingers were bent as well. He couldn't pull them apart.

"Milord! What is it?" Rong cried, running over after hearing his cries.

He stared up at her with wide eyes.

"My fingers…they're broken…I…I can't finish the ritual."


	43. Muge

I apologize that I confused some of you with the rituals (although some of you probably don't realize you're confused). The ritual that Ren is performing is not a revival ritual like Suo's is. As Suo (correctly) stated in the last chapter, Ren doesn't know how to perform one. Thus, his promise to "beat it out of her".

The coins Kai threw were what broke Ren's fingers, not his falling on top of them (that just made it worse). I chose coins because I needed a projectile that would break his fingers, but not slice them off. In a wikipedia article about shurikens, it was mentioned that shurikens and things like that stemmed back to early China with the "art" of coin throwing. Throwing coins is an art? Whatever works.

If you didn't catch on to Kai's comment on Rong's use of the liquid in the vial to heal herself, the women of the Wei family almost always wear bracers and greaves on their lower arms and legs, hiding and protecting small vials of medicines, potions and other substances to aid them. Vials are also kept in a flap under their armored shirts. This is so that even after being injured, they can either heal the wound or at least numb the pain so that they can keep fighting and protecting the female they are designated to. This is also how Rong saved herself after Kai took Pin-Mei and left.

A fellow anime fan at school asked if I was going to make this into a doujinshi. I was contemplating it. It would take so long to finish, plus use up so much paper that I don't know that I'd be up to it. I mean, yes, I would love to be able to do that. Except my drawings of Ren never come out the way I want them to. If I did, it would probably only be for my own enjoyment. Plus, I can't milk this story out for all it's worth. You guys have other things to do with your lives, ne? Still, it would give me the opportunity to change things that I did wrong (like the whole London trip –sweatdrops-). Ah well, I'll think about it. Are doujinshis even supposed to be this effing long?

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Three: Muge (No Obstacles)**

* * *

From behind the wall of light, Rong stared at her master.

"Wha…what?"

Ren looked down at his fingers again. "I can't even pull them apart, let alone form the final seal. There's nothing I can do…The ritual's useless now…"

He lowered his head in shame. Rong did the same, then looked slightly excited. She opened her left bracer and scanned the vials. Not finding the one she needed, she quickly checked her right one, then opened the front flap of her shirt, revealing even more healing substances. She finally chose one, and then looked back to Ren.

"Lord Ren, I have something that will help this situation." She went to cross the wall and run to him. He looked up at her, then suddenly looked alarmed.

"No, Rong! Don't! Don't come over here! Stay back!"

It was too late. Rong screamed as the light began burning her skin.

"Rong! Just go back! I'll figure something out!"

But she just bit her lip and clenched her fists, and then practically crawled over to him. She opened the vial and poured it on his hands. He tensed.

"I'm losing the feeling in my hands."

"It's okay. This is numbing your fingers and dulling the pain." She winced under her own sores and then put her hands on his fingers. "The potion may not have taken effect yet, but we obviously don't have time. It will take full effect soon, but for now, Milord, brace yourself. I apologize for any pain I cause you."

Ren nodded and inhaled deeply, closing his eyes. Rong gave him a remorseful look, then took his middle fingers and snapped them back into place. He gritted his teeth as he held in screams of pain. It was almost too much. It was so painful that he almost felt sick. Even his pride was beginning to slip. He wanted to tell her to stop, but knew he couldn't.

This wasn't about him. This was about revenge. There was no room for selfishness at this point. He had to bear the pain for now. He had to avenge her. But the pain…

Suddenly, there was a soft, warm sensation around his neck and back. He stopped, momentarily ignoring the pain, but as he heard another crack, he grunted as he once again tried to keep his cries inside.

The warmth moved from his neck to his chest, as if it was reaching around his back. He looked down and thought he saw the extremely faint outline of a small pair of arms and hands. It was fainter than a regular spirit's. As if the soul was almost gone…

He looked up and across the room at the fire of Suo's ritual. His eyes widened.

Pin-Mei's soul had moved. Despite the restriction beads, her arms had moved to a position that made it look like she was hugging herself. The peaceful smile she had died with was still on her face.

Almost as if she had felt his gaze, she opened her eyes and looked straight at him. A shiver went down his spine. She gave him a bright closed-eye smile, and then opened them again. After giving him a nod, she assumed her position again.

The warmth left him, but not before he felt it on his cheek.

"I love you," came a whispered voice.

He reached up a restored hand to touch it before it left. "I love you too."

Rong looked at him quizzically. "What?"

He looked at the ground and smiled, despite himself. "Nothing…It's nothing."

After giving him a sad look, she snapped the last of his fingers into place. "Okay, everything's back where it should be."

_No, not yet_, Ren thought. _I have to get her soul back to her body. Only then will everything be back in its place. _

He looked up at Rong as she stood up, pouring liquid on her arms and face. "Are you going back?"

"Of course I am. My job isn't finished yet."

Ren stood up, cracking his knuckles. There wasn't any pain. She stared at him.

"That medicine suddenly kicked in huh? It's one of the strongest ones I have."

He looked over at the fire again. "Yeah, something like that."

Another stare. Rong motioned to go back through the wall, but was burned again.

"You were safe because you were with me," Ren said. "But once you step outside this inner circle, the burning will be back in full force. Here."

He offered her his hand. She studied it, then cautiously gave him hers.

"Hold on, and brace yourself."

"What?"

He gripped her wrists tightly, and then spun in a circle. When he had gained enough speed, he let go, flinging her across the circle and to the ground outside. She tumbled to a stop, hoisted herself up and dusted herself off.

"Jerk!" she yelled despite herself. His mouth turned up slightly. She couldn't tell if it was a smirk or a smile.

He kneeled down and assumed to eighth position once again. He looked down at the characters. Some had vanished. He had to start the stage over again.

"Stage Eight! Power!"

* * *

Suo smiled as she looked into the fire. Pin-Mei's soul was finally beginning to disappear. This meant that her ritual was almost finished. Kai had succeeded in derailing Ren in his ritual, giving her enough time to get ahead. Once the soul disappeared, all she had to do was say the last of her incantations and Hua would rise again.

"Just a little longer…"

The fire flashed and she spread her arms.

"Hua…I give you these bodies to create your own, and this homely soul to fill that body. Use them to come back to us!"

* * *

Ren formed a circle with his hands, his thumbs on top and his fingers on bottom, and his right hand overlapped his left up to his knuckles.

"Stage Nine! Absolute!"

The final circle of characters began to light up as Ren felt an adrenaline engulfing his body. When it was completed, the circle flashed and the Taijitu appeared again. He stood spread his arms apart.

"From the tiger to the horse; seventeen years of spirit and strength. The power to bring Mother Nature to her knees…The power to make the wilted flower bloom once more…The power to give the dead new breath…May I be the humble one to ask for your strength, your abilities, your body, until I am pierced through the heart. May I become a spirit at your command, only speaking to guide you in order to complete my mission. Lend me your power…my ancestor…

"Allow me to integrate with you!

TAO YI!

**FIVE SWORD PENALTY!**"

Almost immediately, a column of light covered him. He seemed to vanish.

* * *

"Hua, now is the time to exact your revenge on the one who took your life, to make hell of the lives of her loved ones. Join us now and fight!

Fan Hua! Rise! Rise and walk among the living to follow the Fan family's destiny!

**RESURRECT!"**

The fire crackled and swirled. Feathers filled the air around it. Suo smirked.

"Good-bye forever, Xu Pin-Mei."

Both rituals exploded.


	44. Tamashii Kasanete

I apologize for the break. Like I said, I'm not confident with fight scenes, and since that's basically what this chapter is, it took a really long time to decide what exactly was going to happen and how to execute it. Plus, some British people are staying at my house, and they're sleeping where the computer is, and it's hard for me to type during the day, since I type better at night, but they're sleeping when I want to type. (I asked the younger British girl how she felt about Ren having a British accent in the dub. She said it was dumb. "I bet there aren't even Chinese people in Britain!" "Yes, there are a lot in fact.")

This one's long…so please don't kill me for being late –cowers-

You guys are going to be screaming by the end of this chapter. Will it be from joy? From sorrow? Let us find out…

Here is my explanation of the **Five Sword Penalty** ritual: An ancestor is chosen to integrate with. This person must be similar in age, stature, and overall body shape (Gender is a given). The ritual is performed and must go through the nine stages before reaching completion; Awareness, Creation, Healing, Intuition, Energy, Dimension, Harmony, Power, and Absolute. Once these stages are all completed, then the caster calls out to the ancestor to request the integration. If it is approved, the caster is sent to a dark void, chained to a cross, and blindfolded. They cannot hear or see anything that happens in the outside world, only what the ancestor says and does. The ancestor appears in the real world using the caster's body as a proxy. The abilities of the ancestor are carried over into the proxy body, but the physical attributes depend on the condition of the proxy body. In Ren's case, the physical abilities could even be better than what Tao Yi's actual body had, considering how well he takes care of himself. As for appearance, the ancestor's head is basically on the caster's body (it is proportioned of course. No Picasso paintings here). From the moment the ancestor appears with the proxy body, a time limit starts. Depending on how well the technique is mastered, it will be longer or shorter. Ren's limit is 40 minutes. Every eight minutes, a sword will appear and strike a place in his body; starting with the right wrist, then the left, through the crossed feet, chest, and throat. If the caster is still attached to the cross when the fifth sword hits, he dies. The limit is not a goal, so it is advised that the battle be fought and won as quickly as possible.

Interesting fact: There actually was a Tao Yi around 245 AD or so. I only realized this after I had already picked the name.

**Notes: "Aibou" means "partner, companion," or "pal".**

**This chapter has Ren/HoroHoro implications. **

**I apologize if the use of the cross in a crucifixion-type manner offends anyone. Not my intention.**

**There is a rather gory description of Tao Da-Xia's death. You've been warned.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Four: Tamashii Kasanete (Souls Overlap)**

* * *

As the light covered him, Ren felt himself being sucked into another dimension, a void.

The sound of rattling chains met his ears for only a split second before they wrapped themselves around his arms, so quickly that it almost made a snapping sound. He was slammed against cold stone, his arms stretched out on either side of him.

A cross.

More chains wrapped around his neck, holding him in place. Another set held his midsection against the stone. His feet covered each other, pinned to the cross by iron clamps. Finally, a blindfold wrapped itself tightly around his head, covering his eyes.

Sweat dripped down his body as he breathed deeply.

_No turning back now._

He stiffened as he heard a semi-deep voice fill the air.

"So, you're the one who called out to me."

Ren raised his head. "Yeah, that's right."

"Hm…"

He felt rough hands on his arms, feeling his muscles before moving down to his chest. They traveled down to touch his abs and a tasteful six-pack. Still, they went lower.

"HEY!" Ren cried.

The hand retracted and he could hear a chuckle.

"Just a joke, Aibou. Just a joke. I wouldn't really do that. I'm a married man, after all."

The blindfold was lifted onto his forehead, and Ren got his first glimpse of the man he had summoned to aid him. He had dark green hair that was tied back in a thin ponytail. His bangs were parted in the center of his head, unruly and slightly spiky. His eyes were a soft amber, contrasting with his descendant's yellow. He seemed to be about the same height, but his features were a little bit softer than Ren's.

Ren sighed. "Why do a suddenly feel like I should have picked someone a little more serious?" he wondered aloud.

Yi looked at him with a jokingly pained face. "Now that just hurts!" He laughed. "Believe me, you're not the only one to say something like that, but everyone bites their tongues when I go into battle." He folded his arms and grinned. "But you must already know that. Why else would you choose me over everyone else in our family's history?"

When Ren said nothing, Yi smirked kindly and continued. He rubbed his chin in deep thought.

"So, what is it we're dealing with here? The enemy outnumbers us and we need a desperate strategy? A spy mission? Or maybe the recovery of a precious artifact…?"

Ren allowed his head to fall. "…The same as you."

Yi stopped and looked at him almost sympathetically. "I see…" He patted his head gently.

Ren clenched his fists. "Don't pity me…I'm over it."

The older boy took his other hand and reached under to touch his face. He sighed. "Of course you are…" He stepped back and looked at him.

"One thing I learned from Da-Xia's death was that the more I pitied myself, and the more I dwelled on the fact that she was gone, the lonelier I became. But when I put on a strong face and acted as if I didn't care, my heart hurt even more. Before I was finally able to gather the strength to go after her killers, her relatives, I had decided that I would take some time to myself every day and think about her. To remember her smile, her laugh, and how beautiful she was, even when she cried, inside and out. I would cry, but I wasn't sad. I knew that Da-Xia wouldn't be able to rest in peace if I was. I didn't know your fiancée, but from what Xu Zhang told me, I don't think she would want you to be sad either."

Ren looked up at him. "You spoke to Zhang?"

Yi nodded. "We both still have to find the people important to us, and with that common goal, we met. You don't meet your lover immediately after you die. You have to search for them. It could take centuries…like it has for me. So dying isn't the easy way out."

Ren smirked. "What makes you think I was contemplating that?"

"Remember, we've both been through the same thing." He closed his eyes and sighed again. "That being said, I'll help you, but know this: Don't push this to its limit. Only go until the fourth sword hits you. Then you can recover and we can try this again. If you die, then your revenge is going to come to a halt. Understand? Quit before the fifth sword hits you."

The caster practically glared at him. Yi glared back.

"Understand?"

"Fine. We'll stop after the fourth sword."

Yi smiled and patted his cheek. "There's a good Tao."

His eye twitched. "Don't. Touch me. Again."

"Alright, gosh. Touchy aren't you? Haha! Touchy! I'm so witty…"

"I really should have picked someone else…"

* * *

**Italics in quotes will be Yi conversing with Ren. Bold italics is Ren conversing back. (or whatever)**

* * *

Jun looked at the two large clouds of dust on either side of the room. "Ren…"

"I think we can trust his judgment," Anna said suddenly, causing Jun to almost jump at her voice. "Like I've said before, he has problems with his personality, but he's not stupid, right?"

Jun nodded and tried to smile. She looked back to the clouds, and then behind her at Pin-Mei. Her skin was now chalk white, and her smile was gone. She turned around and looked at her more closely. Anna looked back at her also.

"If Suo's ritual was successful, then Pin-Mei really is gone. Even a spirit can't survive without a soul."

Jun nodded slowly. She knew she was right. It was all the more reason for her to watch the battlefield closely. Maybe some sign of hope would appear and make it possible to bring her brother's beloved back. Right now, it was all she could do.

She squinted her eyes as the cloud where Ren had been cleared. A figure was standing in the column of light. "…Ren?"

The figure brandished Houraiken and glared at the cloud opposite him as the light disappeared. A strange wind blew through his hair as the look in his eyes intensified. Surges of lightning could be seen covering the sword. Without warning, he rushed toward the other cloud. He almost seemed to skate across the floor.

"_Bason knows to listen to me, right?"_

"_**Right."**_

"_Good. That's going to make this a little easier."_

"_**Just hurry up and stop Suo's ritual! I want to make sure we can save Pin-Mei!"**_

"_I hear you - you don't need to yell…honestly…kids these days…"_

"_**JUST DO IT!**_

Yi sped up, trying to make it in time to possibly stop the sinister ritual before it was too late. He stopped short a few meters in front of it.

"_**What is it? Why the hell did you stop?"**_

Yi didn't reply. He just stared into the cloud, where a shadow could be seen. It raised its left arm midlevel and snapped its fingers. Yi looked behind him just in time to dodge as Minbouken came rushing toward him. It flew into the shadow's hands. The dust of feathers and flower petals began to clear.

There stood Xu Hua, dressed in her black battle attire, but there was now a lavender cloth tied around her waist, making a bow in the back. She opened her eyes and looked at him. Her expression was very upset, clearly angry, but there was also a hint of sadness.

Yi stared at her. _"Shit…"_

"_**What? What is it?"**_

"_There's a girl here, and I'm pretty sure that she's not the one you lost."_

"_**Hua? Hua's really here? But that means…"**_

"_Yeah…I think your girl's gone."_

He lowered his head as he heard Ren go through every single curse word he could think of, repeating some when he had run out. His eyes shot wide when he addressed him again.

"…_**Kill her."**_

"_What?"_

"**_Kill her. It's HER fault Pin-Mei's gone…This was all so that SHE could be brought back. She's not even supposed to be alive! So send her back where she belongs…and maybe she'll release Pin-Mei's soul..."_**

"_Aibou, I know you're upset, but even if she's just a resurrected, imperfect being, she's still human. You can't just take her life away like that. I won't, and you have no say in what I do with this body. I'm not going to kill her. She didn't ask to be brought back."_

"_**How the hell would you know that?"**_

"_If you could see her eyes, you'd say the same thing."_

Yi looked up and could see Suo over Hua's shoulder. She looked him in the eye and laughed.

"My, my. You Taos just can't seem to get a break. Another loss. Ah well…what should I expect from _men_ any how?" She fanned herself.

Yi watched as a spirit with pink curly hair and chalk-white skin appeared next to Hua - the flower guardian.

"Hyoi Gattai! Li-ling in Minbouken!"

With a flash, Minbouken was surrounded by a white light. What looked as if petals were falling from the blade. She looked up at Yi.

Suo snapped her fan shut. "Hua! Attack!"

After a slight moment of hesitation, Hua charged at him. They clashed and a large wave of furyoku spread throughout the room.

As it hit Rong, she felled the kyonshii she was fighting and looked back. Her eyes widened. "Lady Hua…but that means…Pin-Mei…" She began shaking so hard the chains of her whip rattled. "No…She…she's really gone…" She fell to her knees and wrapped her arms around her head. "NO!"

HoroHoro punched away a kyonshii that was about to attack her. "This isn't the time to take a break! Get up! We still have a hell of a lot more of these things to kill – again!"

"You…you don't understand…There's absolutely no hope now…There's no way at all to bring her back…It was the only reason I kept fighting…Nothing even matters anymore…"

HoroHoro yanked her up with his free hand and then smacked her. "Get a grip on yourself, Rong! Yeah, Pin-Mei's dead, we get that, but are you just going to stand by and watch Ren die too? Just because the person you care about died, doesn't mean you can watch the person someone else cares about die too!"

Rong looked up at him with dull eyes. He wasn't looking at her at all. He was looking over at Yi, at Ren. As she made the connection, she gave him a sympathetic smile and stood up.

"Alright, alright, I'm up. You owe me one, Blue Boy."

He smirked as they stood back to back. "Just keep telling yourself that, Macho Chick."

Meanwhile, Yi and Hua were still pushing against each other in the center of the room. Sparks flew from their blades as they glared at each other.

"Usually, it's against my principals to go after beautiful girls such as yourself, but I have my reasons," Yi said with a cocky smile. "You understand, right?"

She pushed him away. "Just shut up. I'm not in a very good mood right now." She slashed Minbouken down and a crescent-shaped light flew from it. It knocked Yi down and sent him across the room.

"_**What the hell are you doing?"**_

"_Leave me alone, it's just one hit. I can-,"_

"_**AAAAGGHHH!"**_

"_What is it, Aibou? What-," _

Then he looked down at his wrist. Blood was dripping from it. He felt no pain, but he knew that eight minutes had already gone by. He lowered his hand, almost in shame.

"_Okay, I was holding back, but for your sake I'll go all out. I can't have you joining me. You'll cramp my style."_

"_**How…very kind of you."**_

Suo came behind Hua. "My daughter! I have missed you so! I'm so happy to have you with me again!" She reached out a hand to her, but her feelings were not reciprocated.

"Don't touch me, Mother."

Suo quickly retracted her hand, startled. "Hua…"

Hua looked at her from over her shoulder. Her blue eyes shot through her mother's heart with an almost killing intent.

"You told me as a child that I should honor the dead and help them find their place of rest… You did not do that for me. I had a child like you wanted, and it killed me. I told Zhang to take care of Pin-Mei, but you got in the way of that. You did not honor my passing, mother."

Suo looked slightly nervous. She almost seemed to cross her arms across her chest, as if to guard herself from her own daughter. Hua's eyes just narrowed even more.

"_Zhang, I know what will help you feel better…there are some women in your room who know the just the thing to ease your pain…"_

Her eye twitched.

"You berated Zhang for staying in his room with the courtesans all those years, but it was you who introduced him to them. You drugged him so that he would allow it to happen. Because of that, he became so intoxicated, so poisoned, so tainted by sex that he forgot his responsibilities as a father. Because you forced Pin-Mei to live her life as me, I was all he saw when he looked at her. It pained him so much that he couldn't stand being around her. I don't blame him for that. He made up for those years by becoming the father I wanted him to be. However, you tried to tear Ren and Pin-Mei apart even before they met. If I hadn't spoken to Zhang in his dreams, they never would have met, and my daughter would have lived a life of hatred similar to Ren's. The only exception would be that she would not have found friends that would change her. She would have remained a cold and heartless person her whole life, hating the world for her own sadness. Now how, dear mother, is that like me?"

No response.

"Is that so? I personally don't see any connections."

She turned around fully. Suo took a few steps back.

"You're afraid of me? You waste my daughter's life bringing me back here and now you're _afraid_ of me? There's just no pleasing you, is there, mother? I watched you abuse my daughter for over fourteen years. I had to watch Ren fall into despair as well. I found myself wondering if this would have happened if I had lived, but living would have meant not having Pin-Mei. That would lead to Ren losing that month of respite that they had ten years ago. I realized there was no way for everything to work out perfectly, but the least you could have done was take care of the child that I died bringing into this world!

"You hurt the two children most precious to me: my daughter and her future husband. You hurt Zhang, the only person I could fully trust, the only person I could ever love. Worst of all, you did it on purpose. Now my daughter is dead, and Ren is ready to throw his life away to avenge her. This is not what I wanted, Mother. I wanted those two to live in happiness together, without having to worry about the cruel world that awaits outside. I didn't know that cruel world was within my own family…If I had known that, I would have just stayed with the Xu family in their home and lived my life there.

"You're hurting the people I love, Mother…and I'll never forgive you for it."

She whipped back around to wait for Yi to come at her again. With a shaking hand, Suo reached into her sleeve to take out a tag.

"I hope you aren't trying to curse me, Mother. I promise you'll regret it," her daughter said, her back still turned.

She dropped it as Hua charged toward Yi.

Hua pulled back and threw Minbouken like a boomerang. Her blade traveled around Yi, who was going to dodge, but then noticed it was nowhere near hitting him. Instead, it took out some kyonshii that were in the process of surrounding him. He stared at her as she caught her sword and continued charging at him.

"Did you do that on purpose or is your aim just **really** bad?" he asked as they crossed blades again.

She smirked. "I was never very good at being evil. As long as I'm here, I might as well help all of you." She parried his next thrust, aiming it at the ground. She touched his chin. "Da-Xia said she was okay with me doing this."

Yi's eyes widened. "Da-Xi-?"

He was muffled by her lips on his. He could feel himself getting slightly weaker, but couldn't escape her touch. When she let go, there was a slight blush on his face, and all he could do for a few moments was blink. Hua giggled.

"I just took some of your furyoku. I hope you don't mind. I need it for some upcoming events." He nodded dumbly.

"_**What's going on out there?"**_

"_N-Nothing…"_

"_**Sure…"**_

Hua took hold of his wrist, which held Houraiken, and raised it to the level of her waist. "I need to borrow Houraiken for a few moments," she said.

Before he could react, she grasped the hilt and forced herself onto the blade. Her former opponent stared at her.

"Why?"

She smiled. "Because I love the both of them very much, and unless I do this and carry out my plan, they can't be together." She looked serious. "Now, I need you to fling me across the room, preferably behind you."

"I don't understand why you need to do this, but alright…" He lifted the sword, with Hua still on it, and gave a mighty heave. She was launched behind him, and he watched as she hit the ground and rolled for a few meters, landing on her left side. He squinted and saw her slip her right hand over her wound. He smirked. "Clever witch."

He turned back around just in time to see Kai coming at him. His eyes were wild with psychotic rage.

"DON'T LAY ANOTHER FINGER ON NEESAMA!"

Yi moved to block his attack, but was distracted by another pained cry from Ren. He looked at his left wrist. A new wound had appeared. "Dammit…two swords already?"

"_I'm going to finish this quickly, Aibou, don't worry."_

"_**Take your time."**_

"_Don't give me that crap. I'm not letting you die."_

"_**Who's in charge of this ritual?"**_

"…_you."_

"_**Right. Now cut this guy down, and then go after Suo. After that…"**_

"_No. We're stopping right there. You're going to stop the ritual and recover."_

"_**Sure…"**_

Yi clenched his fist. "Stubborn bastard."

Kai swung at him. Yi met it and they entered a deadlock. The two glared at each other, thinking about the things they were fighting for.

"How dare you lay a finger on my Neesama after she has only just returned to me! DIE!"

The elder Tao grunted. "Listen buddy, I have my own problems to take care of. I hate to say it, but I don't give a shit about you right now. In fact, I only care about killing you, and ending this madness. Then the scion of the Tao family can be released from this cursed ritual."

Kai smirked. "You're going to find that I won't die so easily."

A smirk returned to him. "We'll see about that.

Kai swung at him once again, and he ducked. Yi planted his hands on the ground, quickly sheathing his sword and putting it in his mouth, and then pushed himself up, launching his feet at his face. His opponent was phased, taking a few steps back.

Yi crouched on the ground, taking Houraiken from his mouth and drawing the blade. He pulled back to swipe at him, but when he did, Kai regained his composure enough to bend backwards, avoiding his attack. As he came back up, Yi rushed at him and grabbed his wrists. They struggled until the forefather's foot slipped.

He looked down to see blood through his socks. He panicked slightly. _ALREADY?_

"_Ren, what's going on? Why is it happening faster?"_

"_**I don't know…it's almost like I lost some furyoku somewhere or something…"**_

Yi's eye's widened. It was because of the furyoku Hua had taken. Had she done it on purpose? She wouldn't…would she?

"_Whatever! I'm ending this NOW!"_

But as he went to move, Kai gained control of his wrists and used his feet to deliver a swift and painful blow to his stomach, sending him backwards. As Yi regained his footing, a blast came at him. He pushed off the ground and jumped high into the air, avoiding it. Knowing time was limited, he pulled out Houraiken and flipped it around him, making hand seals with his left hand. He held the sword sideways in front of his face and then pointed it at Kai.

"LEI-GONG! AID ME! LIGHTING!"

There was a resounding rumble that shook the castle. Above the ancient shaman, a hole was opened in the roof, exposing a darkened, stormy sky. Thunder boomed and lightning surged into the room, surrounding Kai and encasing him in a cocoon of electricity. There was a loud crash, and the lightning vanished. Kai was left standing, visibly burnt. After a few moments he collapsed to the ground.

As Yi landed on the ground, Hua walked past him and knelt down next to her younger brother. Rong followed behind her. Kai looked up at her with innocent and confused eyes - eyes that he had lost fourteen years ago.

"Neesama…please…help me…Make the hurt…go away…Neesama…" he whispered.

Tears in her eyes, Hua stroked her brother's hair. "It'll be over soon, Kai. I promise." She turned to Rong and nodded. The guardian opened her left bracer and took out a vial. She yanked the cap off and poured it all over the tortured body.

He smiled. "Neesama…The pain…is… going away…"

Hua smiled and continued to stroke him. "I'll be there soon, little brother. Just wait for me…"

"…Promise…?"

"Yes…I promise."

Kai smiled once more before his eyes slowly closed. His sister covered her eyes, still trying to smile. She reached into his pocket and took the talisman he had used on Pin-Mei before her arrival, then stood and walked away.

"Put the body somewhere safe, Rong,"

"Of course, Mistress."

Yi looked down at the body. Then he saw the blood dripping from his own chest. He had no idea how long it had been there. Again, he began to panic.

"_Ren! Stop the ritual! NOW!"_

"_**No."**_

"_What the hell do you mean, 'no'?"_

"_**I mean, NO. We still have to kill Suo. Do that quickly and I'll stop the ritual. Not a moment before then."**_

"_Listen, we can do this again later. I'm not letting you die."_

"_**You don't have a say in the matter."**_

"_YOU STUBBORN SON OF A BITCH! YOU CAN AVENGE HER ANOTHER DAY!"_

"**_I doubt you would stop on your quest to avenge your wife."_** He smirked.**_ "Can you even remember what that felt like?"_**

Yi stopped, the memories suddenly flooding to him.

* * *

"_Alright darling, I'm leaving," Yi said, kissing Da-Xia on the forehead._

_She smiled at him. "Good luck. I'll be praying for your success." _

_Her husband couldn't help allowing his smile to brighten even more as he looked at her. He gently touched her slightly rounded stomach. _

"_You be good, little guy," he said to it. _

_Its mother giggled, causing her stomach to jiggle slightly. When she looked back up, Yi was looking at her seriously. He kissed her again, this time on the lips. _

"_I'm so worried…I don't want to leave you alone…" he said. "You know how much your family despises mine…for our history…Things are getting more and more violent. I'm…scared for you…"_

_She smiled and touched his cheek. "You don't need to worry about me, little one," she said with a small laugh. "Everything will be fine. I promise."_

_He groaned. "Just because you're a few years older than me doesn't mean you can call me that. I'm the husband here. I have more power over you..."_

_She smiled again. "I apologize. You're right darling." She touched his chest. "I'll be fine…just be safe…"_

_He nodded, and turned to leave. She grabbed his sleeve. _

"_Will you...show me that power?"_

_He looked back at her and looked into her eyes._

_He left a half hour later._

* * *

"_WHERE IS SHE? WHERE THE HELL IS MY WIFE?"_

_Yi had opened the doors of his castle to see blood on the floor. Da-Xia had not been there. Now, his family members were trying to restrain him as he flew into hysterics. _

"_LET ME GO GODDAMN YOU! LET THE FUCK GO!"_

_He overpowered his relatives and ran out into the garden. As her body came into view, he stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes wide with inexplicable horror._

_Her body was sprawled on the stone ground, her long lavender hair was cut off. The murderers had cut her stomach open and mutilated the defenseless fetus inside. There was blood between her legs, signifying the trauma of rape. Knives were stuck into her chest. Worst of all, her eyes were open. Her soul had been incapable of finding peace._

_He looked to the ground where "LEARN YOUR LESSON?" was written in her blood._

_Quivering, he knelt down beside her, using his hand to close her eyes. He clutched himself in anguish as the tears cascaded down his face._

"_**DA-XIA!"**_

* * *

Ren smirked again. He knew he had struck a nerve.

Yi gasped for breath as he tried to control his anger.

"People like you…" he growled to Suo. "People like you…who are like her family, who sacrificed their own daughter to fulfill their "destiny"…DESERVE TO FUCKING BURN IN HELL!"

He charged at her. Her eyes were wide, still frozen with the fear her daughter had distilled in her.

Suddenly, he stopped, his eyes wide. The body reverted to that of Tao Ren's. He dropped his sword. Blood sprayed from his throat. He fell to the ground.

"_You idiot…"_

"_**Is it wrong that I'm not in the least bit sorry?..."**_

"_Good luck finding her…"_

"_**Heh, thanks…"**_

The chains loosened, and Ren fell.

"_**Hell…here I come…"**_

* * *

Jun watched in horror as her brother fell to the floor.

"**REN!"**

Everyone stopped, able to hear the blood curdling scream from across the room.

HoroHoro looked up. He saw Ren's bloody body on the floor. His eyes widened.

"No…No…NO!"

He bolted over to him, skidding on the floor to stop at the body. He took Ren into his arms like he had done with Pin-Mei only hours before.

"Ren! REN! Open your goddamn eyes!" he screamed at him.

They opened, albeit slightly. He looked at the boy holding him. He gave him a cocky smile.

"Oh, it's only you…"

"Ren…just hold on, okay? Rong'll give you some medicine, and you'll be okay!"

He smiled, knowing his friend's words were all in vain. His breaths were limited.

"H…Hey…"

HoroHoro leaned in closer. "What is it?"

"I'm…I'm sorry I hurt you…"

The Ainu stared at him for a moment, perplexed. Then his eyes widened. "No…Don't you…" Tears began falling down his face. "Don't you DARE think about something like that at a time like this! You idiot!"

"Well…At least I said it…" He looked up at the ceiling. "Tell Jun…and everyone else…I'm sorry too…"

His friend shook his head furiously. "No way! You never say you're sorry! Don't start now!"

He chuckled. "…You're right…Seems like…I can only…end things…at this…point…" He closed his eyes.

HoroHoro stared at him. "Hey!" He shook him. "Hey!" He got hysterical and slapped him. "HEY!"

"REN!"

Jun knelt down next to him and took the limp body from his arms. Tears poured down her face as she tried to talk to her brother, urging him to reply. It was no use. He wouldn't respond. Everyone else surrounded them, with the exception of Hua.

They stared, they cried, everyone pinched themselves. It was impossible for both of them to die in one night, right? The two people everyone had come to save: dead. They didn't hear footsteps as they tried to comfort each other.

"What's wrong with Ren?"

Everyone looked up.

Their eyes widened.

"You…"


	45. Yomigaere

Last chapter, Rong was pouring painkiller on Kai. Hua loved her brother, despite him being led down a horrible path by Suo. She knew he was going to die, so she brought Rong over to make it as painless as possible. Yes, Hua pretty much hates Suo at this point.

I hope you guys aren't mad at me for Ren not carrying on as much as Pin-Mei did when she died. Seeing as the last sword went through his throat, his ability to breathe/speak is going to be severely limited. I have always tried to put Ren at least one step up from Pin-Mei, since I consider him the main character more than I do Pin-Mei. She's just the damsel in distress. –gets shot-

I adopted a Ren plushie. Damn they're expensive (I paid $70 for mine). Yeah, I'm obsessed. I wear my Ren pin everyday. What do you expect?

**Notes: Pin-Mei speaks lyrics from the song "If I Never Knew You" by Joe Secada and Shanice (yes I like it because it's a duet)**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Five: Yomigaere (Revive)/Pin-Mei Snaps**

* * *

_Pin-Mei stood on the roof of Xu/Fan Castle watching the night sky. She gazed at the stars as if she was looking for something. Her arms were folded across her chest, clutching a plush doll about 12 inches in length. She held it tighter and nuzzled her head against its._

_Suddenly, she looked up to see a star streaking by her. Her eyes lit up and she excitedly ran back into the house._

"_RongRongRongRongRong!" she cried as she ran over to her. _

_She slipped on the floor and fell to the ground. Getting up, she looked to her doll and saw that the right arm had begun to fall off. Forgetting what she was originally going to her oldest friend for, she got up and ran in the opposite direction, hysterical. Rong seemed to understand the situation, shrugged, and went back to lifting her weights._

"_LingLingLingLingLing!"_

_Her maidservant looked up from playing her Gaohu. "What is it, Lady Pin-Mei?"_

_On the brink of tears, Pin-Mei held the torn doll out to her._

"_Please Ling! Please fix Lián! PLEASE!"_

_Ling gently took the doll from her and looked it over. She smiled. "No problem."_

_Her master watched intently as she sewed the arm back onto the body, her eyes never leaving her precious doll. When Ling was finished, she handed it back to her. Pin-Mei clutched it as if it were a crying child._

"_I'm so sorry Lián! Please forgive me! I'll be more careful from now on!"_

"_You better, you brat. That's the third time my arm's fallen off this month!" the doll replied._

_Rong sighed. "Milady, why are you giving that doll a voice again? Even worse, why are you making it berate you?"_

_Pin-Mei looked back at her, slightly embarrassed. "Um…well…He WOULD say something like that…"_

_Her servant shook her head. "Ling, you never should have made her that doll. I think she's planning on being impregnated by it."_

_Her face went completely red. "N-No! It's just until I see him again…"_

"_You're eleven, Milady. You shouldn't be carrying a doll around with you everywhere."_

"_But I'm going to see him soon, so it won't matter anyway!"_

"_Hm? How do you figure that?"_

_She had an epiphany. "OH RIGHT! I didn't tell you!" She smiled._

_Rong looked at her quizzically. "Tell me what?"_

_Pin-Mei could barely contain herself. "I SAW IT!"_

_The three servants looked at her (Shu had been reading in the corner). "What?"_

"_The star! The star! I saw the star!"_

_Their eyes widened. "You mean THE star?"_

"_Yes!"_

_They stared at her, and then suddenly ran up to her, screeching and hugging. It were starting. The Shaman Fight was starting._

"_All you need to do now is fight hard and win!" Ling said hopping._

"_Yeah! Then I can see Ren!" Pin-Mei cried._

_Rong's smile faded slightly. "...How can you be so sure he'll make it?"_

_Pin-Mei's eyes sparkled. "Because he's Ren! There's no way he can't!" She giggled, but then stopped. "Guess I won't be winning then…" She smiled. "I don't care though. As long as he wins, I'll be happy."_

_Rong gave her an uneasy smile. 'If you only knew what that family is really like…'_

* * *

"_Darn it…Darn it…DARN IT!" Pin-Mei yelled as she slammed her fists on the ground. "I can't believe this!"_

_She was out in the middle of a clearing near the woods. Misty rain fell on her, but that wasn't what was on her mind. Ma-Ying hovered over her._

"_Mistress…"_

_Rong, Ling, and Shu ran out to see their master sitting on the ground. She alternated punching the ground with each of her fists, her head bowed in shame. It wasn't in a spoiled, bratty type of manner, but one that showed utter disappointment and contempt with herself. They rushed over to her._

"_Milady," Rong said kneeling beside her. "What is it?"_

"…_I lost…" she whispered hoarsely._

_The three guards looked stunned. "What?"_

"_I LOST! I couldn't even land one blow on the stupid priest- so I can't be in the Shaman Fight! I failed! I suck! I absolutely suck! I trained so hard! I wanted to impress him! I wanted him to see that I could be a good shaman too! I…I wanted him to notice me…"_

_The two other girls knelt beside her also and wrapped their arms around her._

"_Don't worry about what he'll think about you," Rong said, her tone holding a hint of jealous defiance. "He should commend you for having the courage to try. It's not easy to gather the courage to take on the shamans of the world like that. Not every shaman is participating in this. If he berates you, he's just not worth-,"_

"_You don't understand!" Pin-Mei cried. "It was all he'd talk about whenever I mentioned being a shaman! He couldn't wait for this! Why would he want to be around a weak girl like me? I can't even help him with the thing most important to him! Compared to him, I might as well be a regular human!"_

_Rong seethed with anger. She grabbed her shoulders and looked her in the eye._

"_Don't you dare compare yourself to him!" she yelled. "He's so cold! Heartless even! He was so nasty to you when you were last over there! He didn't care about you. You were so nice to him, so sweet, but he never gave that same kindness to you. You're polar opposites- you're nothing alike!"_

_Pin-Mei looked at her, tears in her eyes. She was shaking her head slowly. "You're wrong. We are alike. We were both sad. We both were forced to do things we didn't want to do. People hated us. We had no friends. We…we…just wanted people to see us for who we really were…and we gave each other that chance at one point or another."_

_A blush formed on her cheeks._

"_And besides…I really **really** like him."_

* * *

"_I'm so excited! We're leaving in three days!"_

_Pin-Mei hopped around the room, putting things in suitcases and pausing sometimes to look at the picture of her and Ren on her bureau. She'd smile at it and continue hopping. Ling and Shu watched her with amused smiles. Rong was folding her arms and pretending to ignore her. Suddenly, the phone rang._

"_I'll get it!" Pin-Mei hopped over to the phone and picked it up. "Hello? Oh hi, Ran! I'm so—What? Oh. Oh I see. No, no, it's alright. I understand. Don't worry about it. Yeah, some other time. Thanks for calling. Bye."_

_They watched her as she put the phone down, her shoulders drooping._

"_What is it?" Ling asked._

_She turned to face them, trying to smile. "We can unpack the suitcases. We won't be needing them."_

"_Wait, why?"_

"_Ran said there are family problems right now and I shouldn't be there…So that's that…"_

_Ling and Shu looked at her sympathetically. "Lady Pin-Mei…"_

"_I'm fine…really."_

"_Um…You're crying."_

"_Huh?" She touched her cheek and realized Shu was right. "Oh, allergies…Darn those lilies…Haha…"_

_Rong walked over and began wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. "Don't lie to us. We've known you long enough to be able to see right through you. You're upset." She reluctantly picked up Lián and handed him to her. "Now take the proxy plushie and go cry."_

_She did._

* * *

"_HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"_

_Pin-Mei blushed as her father, along with her maidservants, sat around the dining table, a chocolate cake in front of her. She smiled and looked to her right at a picture of Hua she had placed on the table._

"_Thank you, Mom."_

_There was a moment of silence. Pin-Mei looked up at Zhang._

"_Oh Daddy…don't cry…"_

_He turned his head away from her. "I'm not crying."_

"_At least now we know where she gets her stubbornness from!" Ling cried. The table laughed._

_They had cake and Pin-Mei opened a few presents: clothes and an angel plushie from her father and all three maidservants chipped in to get her a new copy of her favorite book, as well as a large white plush seal._

"_I have one last surprise for you, Pin-Mei," Zhang said as the servants were beginning to clean up._

"_What is it?"_

_He sat down on a nearby sofa and patted his knee, signaling her to sit on it. She happily complied._

"_Well," he said. "I recently spoke to Ran."_

_Her eyes lit up. "You did?"_

_He smiled and nodded. "Yes. We decided that you and I would visit them for Ren's 16th birthday. He doesn't know about it, so I guess you could say that you're a special present for him."_

_She giggled, but then her smile faded. "But what if something happens again like all the other times…?"_

"_It's set in stone. No changing it. It'll happen for sure this time. I promise."_

_There was a moment of silence. Then Pin-Mei shrieked. Zhang flinched and tried to cover his ears, but Pin-Mei threw her arms around his neck before he could do so._

"_Kyaaaaaaa! Thank you Daddy! Thank you so much! This is the best present ever!"_

_He smiled. "I'm not finished yet."_

_She blinked. "There's more?"_

_He nodded. "Before you were even born, your mother called Ran, knowing she had had Ren about a year before. She requested that the two of you be married. Ran agreed, and so I later brought you over there so we could see how the two of you got along since Ran questioned Ren's ability to accept others. He did better than the both of us expected. So it was decided that the engagement would go as planned. This visit is important because it will give the both of you time to get to know each other again…and hopefully fall in love."_

_Pin-Mei just stared at him. "You mean…the reason I got to meet him at all was for just this purpose?"_

"_Yes."_

"_And this is for real? No joke?"_

"_No joke."_

_He could feel her body get hotter as a deep blush covered her face. She was staring dumbly, trying to take it all in. The Ren who had saved her thrice, who had noticed her and allowed her to follow him around, who had given her Ma-Ying, who had allowed her to sleep with him since the night she went into his room…she was going to marry that person…_

_A small smile formed. "Thank you…that…makes me so happy."_

* * *

"_Please! Teach me how to cook!"_

"_What?"_

"_Please! I want to be a good wife!"_

_The chef stared at her. There was a desperate, pleading look on her face that was hard to ignore. He finally sighed. "Alright, but you have to do everything I say. Don't complain, and don't get in the way when I make my meals. One chance. Don't blow it."_

"_Thankyouthankyouthankyou!"_

_This is how it was after her birthday. Pin-Mei ran around the castle to ask servants and others in town to teach her how to do their trades, all in the name of becoming the perfect wife. Soon enough, she offered to cook for her father when the servants were away and she was able to heal Lián when he tore a limb._

'_I'll show him…that I'm good enough to be his wife.'_

* * *

_Hua walked to her daughter's body as Jun, Anna, and Manta rushed by her. She looked back and saw Ren on the ground, but tried to tell herself that he was all right and continued on her way._

_When she reached her, she placed her hands over Pin-Mei's chest wound. When she lifted them a minute later, it was healed. She took Kai's talisman and pressed it against her own forehead. With a flash of light, Pin-Mei's soul was pushed out of Hua's body. _

_She quickly turned her head and coughed, allowing blood to fall to the floor. Now her body was only being held together by Ma-Ying's spirit. Pin-Mei's soul had been the thing that kept the imperfect body stable. She could feel her health failing already._

_She shook it off and took her daughter's soul in her arms. Gently, she laid it back into the lifeless body. _

_A few seconds passed. Suddenly, Pin-Mei bolted upright, gasping for air. She put her hand on her chest, checking her heartbeat. She looked around frantically, her eyes widening when they fell on Hua. _

"_M…Mother?"_

_Hua smiled. "That's right."_

_Pin-Mei stared at her, her eyes welling up with tears. She suddenly threw herself at her._

"_MOM!" she cried. Hua held her tightly, doing the one thing she had longed to do since she knew of her pregnancy. _

_They parted, and Pin-Mei looked around the room. She spotted the group that had congregated in its center._

"_What's going on?"_

_She stood and saw Ren's shirt flutter to the ground. Slowly, she stooped to pick it up. Clutching it, she quickly made her way over. As she neared them, she saw Ren's head resting on his sister's lap. She stared at him._

* * *

"What's wrong with Ren?"

Everyone looked up at her, her hair down and out of her usual braids. Their eyes widened. HoroHoro pointed at her with a shaky finger.

"You…"

Rong jumped up and ran over to hug her. Pin-Mei stayed still.

"I have no idea how this happened, but I'm glad to see that you're alive! I missed you so much!"

Pin-Mei wouldn't reply. She just stared over Rong's shoulder.

"Ren…"

Rong let her go and stepped out of her way, knowing now wasn't the time to celebrate. Pin-Mei stiffly walked over and fell to her knees in front of Ren's body. She held her hands out and Jun allowed her to take the body and hold it close to her. He was heavy, and she laughed nervously.

"Ren, you muscle-bound jerk…I can hardly move you like this…You could help me a little bit, you know?" She shook him gently. "You're supposed to wake up before me, remember? You're the morning person…not me…" He wasn't talking. "I'll put more stickers on your Kwan Dao if you don't wake up! I'll do it, I really will!"

Everyone stared at her. Jun started crying again. Pin-Mei started shaking. This wasn't real, was it?

"You know I'm afraid of blood…so you should have cleaned yourself off before going to bed…You like being clean, don't you? DON'T YOU?"

The tears began falling from her eyes.

"Ren, this wasn't how it was supposed to be…_I_ was supposed to die- not you! You have a family! You have responsibilities! You can't just leave like this! Who's going to continue your family? I bet there's a lot of milk in the fridge that will go to waste since you usually drink it all. Your equipment is going to get dusty, you know…"

"_Don't cry so much. You're much prettier when you smile."_

The shaking got worse. She was beginning to lose it. "You…You…YOU IDIOT! YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT! You can't leave me like this! You're all I have left! Everyone else is gone…so you can't go too…it's…it's not nice…"

"_Don't you dare go back to sleep." "But even if I do, you'll stay here beside me, next to me, right?" He smiled. "Of course."_

She started shaking her head.

"You can't be dead, Ren…you can't…you…you're so strong…Strong people like you aren't supposed to die…No…It's…You're…This…No…No…NO!"

"_Why, do you think, I'm going to do **this**?" He tilted her head up and kissed her._

She clutched his body close to her and screamed. "**REN!**" She cried into his shoulder. "Ren…"

She let the corpse slide to the ground. She grabbed her head and continued screaming. Her eyes were wide in horror, she was gasping for air, she continued shaking her head, refusing to believe this.

"_I don't want to be without you."_

"Why did I have to come back if he was going to die?" she screamed. "I want to die again! I just want to die!"

Everyone hid their weapons.

"Honey…"

Pin-Mei looked to her right to see her mother smiling. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" she screamed.

Hua ignored her and slapped her across the face. Her daughter grabbed her cheek in pain.

"Don't EVER wish to die," she said firmly. "It's a foolish wish, and it will only insult those who had their lives taken from them."

Pin-Mei calmed down slightly and looked at Ren again.

"_I want to show you how much I love you…someday."_

"You…You don't understand…He was my world…He was the only reason I wanted to live…He was the only reason I tried so hard to be a shaman…He was the only one who noticed me…He was the only one who cared…He never asked for anything from me…He didn't care about sex or anything like that…He gave me so much…Taught me so much…He protected me…He made me laugh…He was so warm…He let me sleep beside him…He made me feel special…He…He…was the only person other than Father to tell me they loved me…"

She clenched her fists on her knees and stared at the ground. "Ren is the only reason why I am who I am. He changed me. If it wasn't for him, I would…I'd be just like Suo…Angry, bitter and alone…I wouldn't have a heart at all…It's because I met him ten years ago that I was able to be happy and be as nice to people as I could…He was the only one who could make the hurt go away…but now that he's gone…it hurts even more…"

Yoh looked at her fists. Blood was trickling from them and onto her skirt. He could tell that something inside her was building, and sooner or later, it was going to come out. Explode.

"I thought…I would finally be able to get my way…That I would be happy…" she whispered through her tears. "I thought our love would be so beautiful…I thought we could turn the darkness into light…But we…I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong…but still…my heart tells me…we were right…"

Yoh tilted his head sadly. "Pin-Mei…"

Every one looked at her. She just continued staring at the ground, not saying a word.

Suddenly, she stood and ripped her halter off.

After a moment of shock, the girls scrambled to cover the male eyes (Anna decided slapping Yoh to the ground was easier). Pin-Mei ripped her skirt off as well, her black pants still on.

"What the hell?" HoroHoro cried. "This is NOT the time to strip, Pin-Mei!"

"SHUT UP, HOROHORO!" she yelled at him.

Rong stared at her. It had been so long since she had heard her yell. The last time would have been a tantrum when she was four. She watched Pin-Mei throw the shirt to the ground and look at Ren's. After clutching it, she opened it and put it on.

It was big on her, so she pulled the strings as tight as they would go. Satisfied, she produced four yellow clips and began clipping them into her hair. Suo watched her curiously. Her granddaughter's back was to her.

"Ren lived a hard life," Pin-Mei said as she snapped the first clip in, not looking up. "He felt guilty for the bad things he had done. He was searching for peace. Even though he never said it, I could tell. I was hoping I could help him find that peace. I wanted to make him happy. Forever. I wanted to wake up next to him until the day I would sleep forever. I was happy. I think he was too. No…I know he was. I can say that without feeling pompous. I made him happy, and that made me happy. I loved him more than anything. I would do anything for him, no matter what."

"_Here, I brought you some milk." He patted her. "Thanks. I know I can always count on you for that."_

"But now, you've taken him away from me. From us. You forced him to have his life taken away."

She snapped the last clip in and messed up her bangs. Jun's eyes widened. Her hair was fashioned to imitate her brother's. She was a shorter, feminine version of him. Even her stance reminded her of him. That stance of silent anger, which soon turned to one of pride and determination.

"Ever since I met him, I was able to smile when things went wrong. I never got angry. Just sad…"

"_If any of you dirty bastards even THINK about touching her, I will make sure you regret it."_

"But now, Suo, for the first time in my entire life…"

"_I love you. I always will. No matter what happens, I promise I'll always love you!"_

She turned around, her eyes piercing her grandmother's soul like they used to when she was a small child. Her face was creased in anger. Her voice was sharp and low.

"**I'M REALLY FUCKING PISSED!"**


	46. Ryuuro

Hua revived Pin-Mei by first healing her wounds, the cause of her death, and then placing her soul back into her body. However, now Hua only has an incompatible soul within her – Ma Ying's. Her body is now very unstable, so she won't be able to fight. She'll keep coughing up blood until she dies.

For some triumphant sounding music for Pin-Mei to battle to, we will turn to Ayumi Hamasaki's "still alone". It's a sad song, but it is masked by a powerful instrumental.

I recently spoke to a friend I went to a Japanese camp with (not in Japan. Japanese girls came and stayed with us at a sister academy of theirs). She's basically the person that made this fanfic happen. She started talking about Faust and Manta and how under appreciated they are. So I went home and said, "Well, I'll go rewatch Shaman King." And I did. Then, lo and behold, this came into my head (of course it was much different). So yeah, go her!

**Notes: "jouchama" is the female form of "bocchama".  
**

**Hua is going to talking a bit harshly to Pin-Mei in this chapter. It's not that she doesn't love her, she just knows that she needs a little tough love right now.**

**For the record, whenever chibi-Pin-Mei says she loves Ren, she basically thinks it's a synonym for "like".**

"**Renmei" in Japanese means "alliance".**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Six: Ryuuro (Revelation: Pin-Mei's Version)**

* * *

_Pin-Mei woke up and looked to her right. She smiled. Ren was still there beside her. He had said that she would only be waking up like this, with him next to her, once, and then he was going to kick her out, but here she was, two weeks later, still sleeping next to him._

"_Niisama…" she whispered as she inched closer to him._

_His eyes suddenly opened and he glared at her. "Don't get so close to me. It's weird."_

_Pin-Mei looked over her shoulder at his arm, which was still wrapped around her, and giggled. "Okies, sorry."_

_Ren realized his fault and moved his arm away. He sat up and got out of bed. She sat up also and watched as he put on a pale yellow shirt. As he did the last tie, he turned to leave the room, ignoring her. She scampered after him._

"_Niisama! Wait for me!"_

_He picked up his pace. She skipped after him. Ran came into view and stopped the two children. _

"_Are you ready, Pin-Mei?" she asked bending down to her level._

_The little girl cocked her head. "Ready for what?"_

_Ran forced a smile. "You and your father are leaving today. You're going back home."_

_Pin-Mei stared at her. "No…no…NO! I'M NOT GOING BACK! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" She ran over to Ren and latched herself onto his arm, burying her teary face into it. "I'm not going home…I wanna stay here instead…"_

_Ran looked her sadly. "I'm sorry sweetie, but you have to go. En won't let you stay here. He doesn't want you to distract Ren anymore."_

_Pin-Mei lifted her head. "I won't anymore! I promise! I'll be really quiet! Just PLEASE don't make me go home!" She looked up at Ren with pleading eyes. "Please Niisama! Don't let them take me!"_

_He just stared down at her with apathetic eyes. They made her even more upset._

"_Please Niisama! I want to stay here with you! I love you! I love playing with you! Please help me!"_

_He just kept staring down at her, emotionless. Suddenly, she was picked up by the collar of her shirt by Zhang._

"_We're going," he said bluntly._

_Ren watched him carry her away, his name still being called. He and his mother watched until their visitors were out of sight. His mother looked at him._

"_Ren, darling-"_

"_Don't talk to me. I want to be alone – again."_

_He went back to his room and slammed the door, the sound echoing through the long and empty halls. Ran stared at it._

"_Oh Ren…"_

* * *

Rong stared at Pin-Mei. This was a side of her that even she had never seen. She had yelled. She had sworn. Someone who was so embarrassed about her body had ripped off her clothes as if she didn't care who saw her. Then she had fashioned herself to look like her fallen fiancé. Now, she stood over Ren's lifeless body, a look of bloodlust in her eyes. Rong found herself slowly inching away from her. It wasn't until she bumped in HoroHoro that she realized she had moved at all.

He looked down at her. "What?"

She blinked a few times and swallowed. "…I think…I think I'm nervous."

He cocked an eyebrow. "For her?"

"No…for us. The few times Lady Hua became enraged, the results were staggering. Since I've never seen Pin-Mei in this sort of rage before, I have no idea what's going to happen."

He looked up at the heartbroken girl. "I guess it will depend on whether she's simply paying homage to Ren by looking like him, or if she's trying to _be_ Ren."

"Rong."

Rong snapped her head up to look at her master. "Yes, My Lady?" she replied in a shaky voice.

Pin-Mei didn't turn to face her as she spoke. "I'm sorry if I scared you. All you guys need to do is watch. I'm not letting anyone else get hurt because of me. You're all important to me. You were important to Ren, too. I could tell. I'm going to protect the people important to him…I wouldn't be honoring his memory if I didn't."

She clenched her fists.

"Justice needs to be served. A few months ago, I wouldn't have known what justice was…but when Ren came to rescue me, I learned it. Sometimes, what seems to be malice can be justice in disguise. He killed the syndicate in order to save me, and to punish them for touching me. Destroying the evil…that was his justice. And now…" She lifted her head. "It's my justice as well."

She looked to Bason, who was hovering over his master's body.

"Bason," she began. "I know that we've never worked together…and that it may go against your usual practices, seeing as I'm not from the Tao family…but to avenge Ren, it's something we must do. I don't have Ma Ying anymore, so I need you."

Before the spirit could reply, a tag landed on his forehead. He disappeared. Pin-Mei's eyes widened. She ran over and picked up the tag.

"Bason!" she cried. She stared at the characters on it. "… 'Seal'…No…I need him…I can't fight without a spirit…"

Hua knelt down and took the tag from her. She examined it, then put it in her robe. "He'll be fine. Once Suo is defeated, he'll come out again. No harm will come to him." She stood and looked down at her daughter, who still knelt on the ground in anguish. Hua sighed and pulled her up by the scruff of her neck. "Dry your eyes, Ren-Mei. Don't shame your fiancé's memory by crying when you said you would fight."

Pin-Mei's arm was still covering her eyes. "But what am I going to do? I don't have a spirit to help me…"

"…Jouchama?"

She removed her arm, still looking to the ground, to see Li-Ling looking up at her. Her pink eyes were soft and beautiful, full of concern. As Pin-Mei straightened up, Li-Ling kept her eyes on her.

"Jouchama, maybe I could be of service?" she offered gingerly pointing at herself.

Pin-Mei's eyes widened once again. "You're a spirit!" she cried pointing at her.

Rong and HoroHoro blinked.

"Not as sharp as Ren," he said.

"Unfortunately, no," she agreed.

Pin-Mei gave a half-smile. "Great. Now we're on to something." She looked around and saw Minbouken on the far side of the room. "Aw crud."

Yoh blinked. "Are you going to go get it?"

She shook her head. "No need to."

They watched her extend her hand, which was in a gentle fist, and snap her fingers. Minbouken leaped into the air and sailed toward her. The grip landed perfectly in her hand. The three boys and Jun stared in awe. The boys clapped a few times.

"How did you do that?" Manta cried.

"That's my ability," Hua piped in. "Before I died, I wrote down my abilities in a book and gave it to Zhang to give to Pin-Mei. It had instructions for how to learn each of the different spells and attacks. I wanted her to be ready in case something like this ever happened."

Pin-Mei let out a Ren-like sneer. "Like she said, I learned it from that book."

"The ability is based on the will of the weapon you want to fly to you. If that weapon wants you to use it, it will comply, if not, it will remain where it is. Minbouken has part of my will in it since I wielded it before Ren-Mei here, that's why it didn't hesitate to fly to her."

Her daughter twitched. "Stop calling me that."

Hua grinned. "You'll have to deal with it. It sounds cute."

She scoffed at her. "I'm going. Come on, Li-Ling." She began walking away.

"Of course, Jouchama!" She floated after her.

"Ren-Mei, what page did you get up to?" Hua called.

"Ten," Pin-Mei called back, not bothering to stop or turn around.

Hua looked slightly worried. "That's three or four spells at best…"

"Why? How many pages are there?" Yoh asked.

"…285," Hua said softly. "That's not going to be enough…Suo will easily defeat her."

"Li-Ling in Minbouken!"

As the rosy petals dripped to the floor, Pin-Mei glared at Suo. "Finally, for once in your life, dear grandmother, you're going to feel pain that can be compared to nothing else." She sprinted toward her, her blade raised. "The pain I've been living with all these years…You're going to feel it!"

"I'm shaking in my robes."

Suo waved her fan, sending a strong wind at her attacker. Pin-Mei halted and braced herself against it, resuming her charge when it had subsided. She leaped up into the air and aimed her sword at the vile woman. As it looked like she was about to connect, Suo caught the blade in the fan. She smirked.

"Fool."

Pin-Mei watched in horror as Minbouken shattered.

"No…"

Suo snapped the fan shut, turning it into a dagger. "It's a good thing you aren't really part of the Tao family. They don't need any more embarrassment."

She stabbed her through the stomach. She took another fan from her sleeve and sent another strong wave at her granddaughter. Pin-Mei flew across the room and slammed into the wall. She coughed up some blood and fell to the ground.

The group stared at her. Rong started running toward her, but Hua held her back.

"Don't. This is her fight."

Rong looked back at her angrily. "So I'm supposed to sit here and watch her die…AGAIN?"

Hua shook her head. "She'll be fine." She smiled in Pin-Mei's direction.

Rong turned back around to see Pin-Mei standing up, removing her hand from her stomach. "She…she can…"

Hua smiled again. "Page one."

The look on her daughter's face was that of pure determination and anger. She slowly walked to the middle of the room. Suo sneered at her.

"What are you going to do now, Pin-Mei?" she scoffed. "You have no weapon anymore. I doubt you can use your fists, so what's next…Ren-Mei?"

Pin-Mei twitched. She had no idea what to do next. It was true that she had no weapon she could use. She squeezed her eyes shut.

_She's right…What should I do?_

Then she looked up at the ceiling.

_My room is above this one…_

She smirked and raised her head, lifting her left hand to the ceiling.

"Come."

The ceiling opened up and hundreds of stuffed animals floated down and hovered next to and behind her. Pin-Mei looked forward again as one plushie flew down in front of her. She opened her arms and it glided over to her. With a small smile, she embraced it tightly.

Rong stared. "I can't believe this…"

HoroHoro came up next to her. "What? What's so special about that one?" He squinted to get a better look at the plushie. It had purple hair with a small tongari, shining yellow eyes, and a disgruntled frown on its face. His eyes widened. "Why is that..."

They watched as Pin-Mei let go of the plushie and it perched itself on her shoulder.

"That's…Lián…"


	47. Seigi no Shisha

I miss Ren –cries-

Believe it or not, I used the song "Advent: One Winged Angel" while writing this. That song owns my soul. Entirely.

**Notes: There can be some dispute as to whether or not spirits can touch people. For all purposes, we're going to follow the anime's lead and say that they can (Bason puts his hands on Ren's shoulders in the last episode, and they don't sink through). And even if this is wrong, I say that people can manipulate the age of their spiritual appearance once they die…cause I want to do that when I die. **

"**Di Yu" is the Chinese realm of the dead. There are 18 levels which correspond to the different crimes people committed. Look it up in wikipedia. It'd take too long to explain here, but I will tell you that in The Chamber of Avici, the condemned stand on a platform above an inferno. The unlucky ones fall in and their souls are forever lost. The "lucky" ones stay on said platform. These souls will never be reincarnated.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Seven: Seigi no Shisha (Messenger of Justice)**

* * *

_Rong smiled as she exited the carriage, breathing in the fresh air. "Ahh…It's so nice to finally get some clean air. Everything at…**that place** smelled like death. I wanted to absolutely hurl. Right, Lady Pin-Mei?"_

_She turned to see the little girl trudge past her and into the house. Rong could only stare after her for the first few moments. She finally followed her to her room. As they opened the door, they saw a girl straightening out the stuffed animals and the various dolls that were around her room. The girl stopped for a few moments when she came to two life-size dolls. One had very short light green hair dressed in a short, modern version of traditional Chinese robes, and the other had red-violet hair tied back in a long ponytail and armor-like robes, complete with bracers. She soon realized they had entered and quickly turned around to greet them._

_She had turquoise buns in her hair and wore a magenta blouse with matching pants. She smiled as she sweetly held out her hand. "Hi, Lady Pin-Mei! My name's Ling! I'll be helping take care of you starting today!"_

_Pin-Mei looked at her with disinterested eyes. _

'_She's going to throw a tantrum. She hates it when someone other than me tries to take care of her.' Rong braced herself for yelling, but none ever came._

"_Oh…Thank you…Nice to meet you…" Pin-Mei weakly shook the girl's hand and walked past her on her way to the bed._

_Rong just stood gaping at the situation. 'What? What happened? Why didn't she throw a fit? Who are you and what have you done with the bratty Pin-Mei who was here a month ago?'_

_Ling was still smiling, convinced that her new master would if she did it enough. She watched her get into bed and hide under the covers, and then went to go sit near her. She rubbed her back gently through the covers. The small girl's body shook under the blanket as she cried._

"_What's the matter, Lady Pin-Mei?" Ling asked._

"_I…I miss Niisama…"_

_Her new servant blinked at her. "Nihao?"_

_Rong groaned. "Niisama. She means this bratty kid from the Tao family. Rotten personality. Ego the size of the Great Wall." She hit her palm with her fist. "Riles me up just thinking about it."_

_Ling turned back to Pin-Mei. "I'm sure you'll see him again soon."_

_The lump under the bed seemed to shake its head. "Father said we're not going back. I'm never going to see him again!" She started wailing into a pillow._

_A few minutes later, when her bags arrived, she went and took out the few photos Ran had given to her. She sat on her bed and went through them. Once. Twice. Three times. Four times. Ling eventually lost count. She finally reached out her hand._

"_My Lady, may I look at them?"_

_Pin-Mei studied her, then cautiously placed them in the older girl's hand. Ling sifted through them, finally taking out one in particular. _

"_May I borrow this one?" she asked holding up a photo of Ren and his little shadow sitting on the porch with his precious basket of milk. Pin-Mei was confused, but nodded. Ling smiled and excitedly jumped off the bed. "I'll be back later tonight! You're going to love this!" She ran out and shut the door._

_That night, as Rong was putting Pin-Mei to bed, Ling rushed into the room, panting. There was an accomplished smile on her face. She walked over to the little girl, who was now under the covers, getting ready to turn in for the night. Her arms were behind her back as if she was hiding something._

_Pin-Mei's tired eyes were only half open as Ling approached her. She looked up at her as if to say 'Am I dreaming yet, or is this real?'_

_Her new servant just smiled and produced a 12 inch plush toy. "I spent the whole afternoon making this for you, My Lady," she said. She handed it to her._

_Pin-Mei took it and squinted her eyes at it. She was so tired that it was hard for her to see anything at this time of night (it was nine, a half hour past her bedtime). But when the image finally registered in her brain, her eyes became enlarged with shock and disbelief. She turned to Ling._

"_This is Niisama!" she cried._

_Ling giggled. "Yeah, I know. I used that picture you gave me so that I could make it. I thought it'd bring you comfort until you get to see him again."_

_Pin-Mei looked at the plushie again. She smiled and hugged it. "Thank you."_

_Rong gave a small smile as she rolled over, clutching the doll. _

"_What are you going to name him?" Ling asked._

_Pin-Mei opened her eyes slightly, then closed them again._

"_Lián."_

* * *

The group stared at the ensemble of stuffed animals in the center of the room. They hovered behind Pin-Mei ominously with glowing eyes. Lián showed no sign of life, however; he only sat on her shoulder, observing.

HoroHoro pointed at the scene in disbelief. "WHAT THE HELL? She has a _doll _of him? That's so creepy! She's friggin' obsessed! Dude!"

"Regardless," Rong said. "She found comfort in that doll, and that's the only reason why I didn't burn it."

Hua put her hand on her shoulder, smiling. "And because I told you I'd haunt and possess you for the rest of your mortal life if you did."

The Wei heir flinched, then sweatdropped. "Yeah, that too."

"But what is she going to do with that doll?" Yoh asked. "Is she going to use oversoul on it?"

"Actually-"

"Shh, Rong! Don't spoil it!" Hua giggled. She turned discreetly as she coughed up some blood.

They looked up to see two life-like dolls floating down from the ceiling. One with lime green hair; the other with red-violet hair. Rong recognized them right away.

"Lord Zhang gave her those dolls…"

"That I did."

Hua froze. The others turned. Rong and Jun's eyes widened.

"Lord Zhang…"

Zhang's spirit stood before them, seemingly in his twenties. He smiled and raised his hand. "Hello Rong, Jun, and all these new faces." He tilted his head to look past them. He smiled. "Who's that beautiful girl I see over there?"

Hua was still tense, shaking, her arms grasping each other. She was paralyzed. She couldn't turn even if she had the courage to.

"Miss Hua, you don't have to stand so far away from me. I'm not going to hurt you."

Hua lifted her head slightly, remembering that these were some of the first words he had spoken to her. She practically jumped when she felt his hand on her shoulder. He gently turned her to face him. There were tears in both their eyes.

It had been fourteen years since he was last able to see her. After her death, he had begged Suo to help him develop any sort of sixth sense so he could see her spirit, but she refused. After a while, he lost all hope and fell into his deep depression that lasted over a decade.

"Heh. I'm here ten seconds and I've already made you cry. What a wonderful husband I am."

Not knowing what to say, she just buried her face in his chest and cried. He chuckled and patted her head. "How old are you now?"

"T-Twenty-eight…you know that…"

"And yet you still cry like you're twelve."

"Don't make fun of me…"

"And still sensitive, too."

Rong let a small smile through, but then looked serious again. She stepped forward, knowing what she was about to do was out of line.

"I apologize Lord Zhang, Lady Hua, but your daughter is fighting what could potentially be a losing battle…"

They looked at her and, amazingly, laughed. The group stared at them like they were crazy.

"Forgive me, but why are you two laughing? Your daughter could die!"

The couple stopped and looked at each other, smiling.

"Pin-Mei won't die," Hua said, her voice full of confidence.

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because," Zhang said. "Pin-Mei has a gift that few people possess. And it is that gift that will keep her alive."

"What gift is that?" Yoh asked.

"The gift to gain power from your emotions."

Hua nodded. "Most people are clouded by anger when they fight. Ren was, despite what he said, but Pin-Mei deals with her anger like Ren dealt with his pain. She kills the anger and keeps it inside, turning it into pain, so as not to hurt others. She's been doing this for more than ten years, and she's mastered it."

"Pin-Mei hates fighting, which is a reason why I never forced her to learn the DaDao. Sometimes I would pay her teacher off when Suo wasn't around so she didn't have to do it," Zhang said. "But she knows that there are things that can't be solved by running away from them and hiding, nor from talking it out, and right now, she is fighting for a lot of things."

"Yeah, cause she's pissed that Ren's dead," HoroHoro said, trying to sound intelligent.

Zhang gave a half-nod. "Yes, but there are other things."

"Like what?"

"She's fighting to save his pride, for him dying before he was able to kill Suo. She's fighting to avenge myself and Hua, as well as the others Suo has killed. She's fighting to free the village from the fear they've had to live with all their lives." He paused, giving a small smile. "But for the first time in her life, she's fighting for herself."

The boy tilted his head. "Herself?"

He nodded again. "She's finally able to let out all the pain and anger she's bottled up over the past ten years. It hurt her so much to do it. She'll finally be able to break free of the shackles Suo put on her the moment she was born. She'll finally be able to be her own person. It'll be her chance to bloom."

The team looked back over at Pin-Mei, who was still staring at Suo, stone-faced.

"But really, what's she going to do with that Ren doll? Is she going to use it to fight?" HoroHoro asked again.

The couple both shook their heads.

"If this were a few centuries ago, Pin-Mei would probably be the example of how a wife should treat her husband," Zhang said. "She respects Ren, you all know that. She worships the ground he walks on, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. She honors him like a wife of that time would have been expected to. Because of the respect she has for him, she would never use Lián to fight. Never. She knows that the mere fact that she has a doll version of him is something he would not approve of or appreciate. She's trying to do something by herself. But again, why do people have plush toys like that? For comfort. Even now, she still needs his comfort, and that's why Lián is there."

"I see now."

"SUO!"

Everyone snapped their heads back to look at Pin-Mei, whose face with creased with anger. "I don't need a stupid sword to kill you! You're weak enough as it is! Anyone who had any sort of strength wouldn't take their sorrow out on others like you have!"

Suo glared at her, but then smiled. "I was weak enough to have a hand in killing your precious fiancé…"

Pin-Mei's eyes quivered, as if remembering the pain she had felt.

_She clutched his body close to her and screamed. "**REN!**"_

Pin-Mei clenched her fist and gritted her teeth. Her eyes flared, but then her head drooped to the ground. Lián seemed to poke her head, and she lifted it again. She spread her arms out, palms up.

"FAN YAN! WEI SHAN! SPIRIT BALL MODE!"

Suo and Rong froze as a spirit ball appeared in each of her hands.

"HYOI GATTAI!"

Pin-Mei ran a few feet, jumped, and slammed each of the spirits into one of the two lifelike dolls. The dolls opened their eyes and she smirked.

"Go have your revenge."

Both rushed toward the stunned woman on the far side of the room.

"Y-Yan…? How…" She blinked and finally realized that she had to block. Her fan opened 360 degrees and shielded her. The green-haired doll pulled out a pair of bladed fans, three times larger than her adversary's, while her partner opted for a Song sword.

They charged at her, but some kyonshii got in their way. They quickly disposed of them and continued toward Suo.

"Yan!" Suo cried putting on a nervous smile. "Please, darling! You don't want to hurt Mommy, do you?" Before she knew it, Yan was in her face.

"Mommy, you left me outside by myself…I screamed for you…but you didn't come. They touched me, Mommy. They hurt me, Mommy. Mommy…why didn't you save me?" she whispered, her voice full of child-like innocence.

Her mother's eyes widened as she remembered standing by the window, too frightened of the mob of men to go and save her daughter. She shook. The sight of her daughter's small and bloody body filled her mind.

Yan raised her fans to strike her, but Suo sidestepped out of the way. She took out a tag, but Yan grabbed her wrist and twisted it.

"Are you going to make me go away again, Mommy?"

Suo screamed and slapped the charm on her, exorcising Yan's spirit from the doll's body. As she sat on the ground panting, Wei Shan stood in front of her.

"You killed my mistress," she said. "You killing me is not my biggest problem, but because you forced Lady Hua to give birth, you cut her life short. I refuse to tolerate that." She raised her blade.

Suo screamed and backed away.

"Woah, Pin-Mei's dolls are even creepier than Ren!" HoroHoro exclaimed.

"Lián," Rong corrected him, her voice airy. Pin-Mei was using her sister's spirit to combat the evil mistress. It was something she was having a little difficulty swallowing.

"I bought her those dolls for her third birthday," Zhang said. "I was foolish and hoped she would leave me alone after that…" He looked at the ground with shameful eyes. Hua put her hand on his cheek.

"It's alright, darling. It's all in the past. No use worrying about it now."

He sighed. "You and Pin-Mei; forgiving to a fault."

They looked back to Suo and Wei Shan. Pin-Mei was standing on the opposite side of the room, her arms folded, and her hands cradling her elbows. She was smirking with dark malicious eyes as she watched the doll torment her grandmother. Suo kept leaping away, her eyes wide with horror as she stared into the doll's vengeful visage. Shan's sword almost made contact numerous times, but her target always seemed to slip away.

Suo's back hit the wall. She was trapped. There was nowhere to run. Shan raised her sword over her head and went to bring it down. Suo let out a blood-curdling scream and desperately threw the tag. It landed on the doll's forehead, causing it to freeze. It collapsed, dropping the sword. She stared at it with wide eyes, panting, trying to calm down.

"Oh, Grandmother…you broke my dolls…Father gave them to me…they were very special…"

She looked up to see Pin-Mei come and squat in front of her. Her eyes were malicious with what seemed to be a tint of red. She patted the middle-aged woman on the shoulder.

"You seem a bit shaken, ne? Well, I should be the one upset. You broke my favorite dolls." Lián poked her again. "Except for you, of course, Lián." She turned back to the quivering mess against the wall. "Well, I guess I'll just have to break something of yours…"

She looked around and spied Kai's body. She smirked again and stood up, making her way over to it. As she approached it, Hua's eyes widened. She tried to run to her daughter, but collapsed and started coughing up more blood. Rong turned to her.

"Lady Hua, what is it?"

Hua looked up, obviously trying not to cry. "Don't let her hurt Kai's body! Please Rong! He has nothing to do with this!"

Rong held her stare for a few seconds, trying to decide whether to interrupt her master's revenge or to honor Hua's wishes. Finally, she turned to Yoh and HoroHoro.

"You two, come with me. We have to stop Pin-Mei."

The boys nodded and began to run after her. Anna held Yoh back.

"Yoh isn't going to get into this any more than he already has. Sort it out yourself," she said coldly.

"Anna…" Yoh whispered, too timid to argue.

Rong glared at her, then nodded to HoroHoro. "Prove to me that you have a pair; let's go."

Pin-Mei had yanked Kai up by his hair and pulled a small dagger from his shirt and held it to his neck. Suddenly, her hand was frozen. She looked down at it, not amused, and turned to see Rong and HoroHoro.

"What's this for?" she asked in a bland tone.

"Pin-Mei, stop this. You're going too far. Suo's your target, not Kai. Your mother wants you to stop. He has nothing to do with this," Rong reasoned with her.

Her eyes flared in rage. "Nothing to do with this? NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS? DID YOU REALLY JUST SAY THAT?" she screamed. "HE MADE THIS HAPPEN! HE CURSED REN AND CAUSED US TO BE SEPARATED! THIS IS **ALL** HIS FAULT!"

She shook the ice off and went to slice through Kai's throat. Rong grabbed her hand. Pin-Mei glared at her and grabbed the guard's biscep. With a flick of her wrist…

**SNAP**

Rong looked down at her limp arm, the pain surging through her. She slowly looked up at her mistress, who didn't seem the least bit remorseful. "Pin-Mei…What's happened to you?"

Her master laughed. "I've come alive."

She was about to stab Rong through the heart when something cold punched her. Stumbling, she looked up to see HoroHoro standing in front of her bodyguard.

"That's a lousy reward for all those years of service."

Rong studied his back, seemingly astonished that he was defending her. "Aokun..."

Pin-Mei gritted her teeth and grabbed the dagger. "Piss off." She charged.

Suddenly, a hand grabbed her. She looked back to see Yoh glaring at her with cold eyes.

"Pin-Mei, I know you're trying to avenge me, but stop."

Her eyes widened.

"…Ren?"

* * *

"Has the jury reached a verdict?"

"We have, your honor."

"What say you?"

"We, the jury, find the defendant, Tao Ren, guilty of all the sins he has been accused of."

The judge nodded. He looked down at Ren, who had his hands bound in front of him. Ren's eyes showed neither fear nor shock at the events, as if he were expecting them.

"Tao Ren, in accordance with the jury's verdict, you will atone for the over three hundred innocent lives you stole throughout your thankfully short life in the human world. Your sentence: You will spend one century in The Chamber of Oil Cauldrons for your crime of attempted rape and other offenses of that sort. Then, you will serve five centuries in The Chamber of Pounding for your numerous murders. After two centuries in The Chamber of Heart-Digging, you will spend all eternity in The Chamber of Avici. And I pray to the Great Spirit you fall in."

Ren lowered his head to hide a smirk. _At least they can't give me the death penalty._

"Do you have any last requests?"

Ren thought for a moment, then looked up. "I want five minutes in the real world. Someone needs me."

The judge studied him, then talked with his officials.

"He _did_ have that one girl."

"But don't forget the crime he committed against her."

"What more harm could he do?"

"Just let him go as a spirit. If something happens, we pull him back and push him straight into the inferno."

The judge sneered as he looked at Ren. "I like that idea."

"Alright, Tao Ren. You'll get your five minutes. Make it quick."

The chains on Ren disappeared, then so did he. He found himself running down a dark tunnel. A light at the end never seemed to get any closer. Frustrated, he tried to run faster.

_Pin-Mei…I'll be there to help…just wait…_


	48. The End of the Xu Family

Well, there was a pairing I was hinting at since 43 or 44. Now, it's blatant.

Gah…so tired…I posted this at 2 AM. Imagine…when this is done…I can sleep again…

**Notes: "Roulect" is a neologism meaning to select something from many options, but still being able to choose what you want.**

**More Ren/HoroHoro implications.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Eight: The End of the Xu Family**

* * *

Pin-Mei looked at Yoh. The stern, cold look in his eyes resembled Ren's so much that it was nearly impossible to deny him.

"…Ren? Is that really you?" she whispered.

He seemed to pay no mind to her awe at his appearance. "Pin-Mei, you can't go on like this. You're not acting like yourself. You lose when you try to do things you're not used to and not capable of. You'll begin to waver, and your power goes down when that happens." A small smile appeared on his proxy's face. "Just be Pin-Mei and you'll win. I know you will."

"Ren…" She wriggled from his grasp and hugged him. "I'm sorry, I'll do better…I won't act like this anymore…I'm so sorry."

He looked slightly uncomfortable. "Don't apologize to me, apologize to Rong. You broke her arm."

Pin-Mei looked behind her to see HoroHoro attempting to tend to Rong's arm, but failing miserably.

"Um…how about if I…"

"OW! DON'T FREEZE IT JACKASS!"

"AT LEAST I'M TRYING YOU OLD HAG!"

"I'M NOT A HAG! I'M ONLY A YEAR OR TWO OLDER THAN YOU!"

"HAG HAG HAG! RONG'S A HAG!"

"IF MY ARM WASN'T BROKEN, I'D RING YOUR SKINNY LITTLE NECK!"

They went back and forth, and Yoh did his best not to giggle, forcing himself to regain his stern gaze when Pin-Mei turned back to him.

"I have to go now. It was hard enough to get over here, and I can't maintain this state for long. Just remember to be Pin-Mei and not someone else, alright? You'll win that way. I'm positive you will." He patted her head. "And no more swearing alright? You're supposed to be the innocent one."

She stared at him for a few moments before burying her face in his chest. "Ren…"

Suddenly, she was knocked to the ground. She looked up to see a rather perturbed Anna.

"You can get away from my husband now," she said, her voice still cold.

Pin-Mei looked up to see her dragging Yoh away, who was seemingly free of Ren's possession. She clenched her fist on the ground.

_Pin-Mei…You're such an idiot, _she said to herself.

She stood and snapped her fingers. Shan's Song blade flew to her and she took it.

"Yet again, I've strayed from my path. I say I'm going to do things, and I don't do them. I just screw up again. I'm disgracing Ren…And I can't handle that. From now on…" She looked over her shoulder at Suo. "I'll make him proud…I'll keep myself. I refuse to let him down…to let everyone down."

She looked at Rong, who was still bickering with HoroHoro about how to treat her arm. Sheepishly, she shuffled over and knelt down in front of her. She gently took Rong's arm and ran her hand down it. She sighed and stood up.

"Sorry."

She walked away. Rong stared at her, then suddenly found she could move her arm without any pain. She rubbed her wrist, trying to get the feeling back in it. The Ainu blinked at her.

"Is it really okay?"

"Yeah."

"She could have given a more heartfelt apology."

"She's embarrassed. It's alright, I know she didn't mean it." Rong stood and began walking back to the group. He followed. "To tell you the truth, her heart is still really confused. She doesn't know how to act right now. She wants to be strong like Ren, but she doesn't know how. She doesn't get that Ren's Ren, and she's her. Pin-Mei can't be Ren, and Ren can't be Pin-Mei. The only way she'll know is through trial and error, and as long as she isn't in any mortal danger, I'll stand by and watch."

"I guess…" He smiled slightly. "But it was kinda cool how he stopped her like that."

"Who, Ren?"

"Yeah."

She laughed.

"What?"

"That wasn't Ren, you fool. It was just Yoh _pretending_ to be possessed."

He fumed. "Hey, lady, I've been around Ren a hell of a lot longer than you, and I know when he's there and when he's not."

"Wow, what a lousy friend. It blatantly wasn't him. For one thing, his eyes were still too soft. Yoh isn't capable of keeping Ren's constant eagle-eyes. And he looked really uncomfortable when Pin-Mei hugged him. Not only that, he didn't tell her he loved her before he left. Plus, he "left" so suddenly. It was Yoh."

"It was Ren! I'll bet you anything it was!"

"Fine, your headband. You have to give it to me if I'm right."

"And WHEN I'm right, you have to treat me to a Chinese buffet."

They stopped, shook on it, and continued on to join the group. When they got there, Rong put on the sweetest face she could muster.

"Why, Yoh! That was a lovely performance! You had me fooled for a minute there! Awesome job!" She gave him a thumbs up.

There was a moment of silence. Finally, Yoh blushed slightly and put his hand behind his head.

"Hehehe…Thanks, it was really hard."

HoroHoro's jaw dropped. Rong smirked and held out her hand, and he meekly put his headband in it.

"Nice doing business with you."

"Shut up…Hag…"

She slapped him with the headband. As he fell to the ground, she examined it. "Hm, guess I actually _will_ have a use for this after all."

"But why didn't you just channel him for real?" HoroHoro asked as he got up.

Anna folded her arms. "There's no way even I can reach him right now. He must have already been condemned."

His eyes widened. "What do you mean, 'condemned'?"

"His fate in the afterlife has probably already been decided. Depending on how he's judged, we may never be able to contact his spirit."

"But why?"

"Because of the way Ren used to be…"

Everyone looked back to see Jun with her right hand on her left arm, which hung straight at her side.

"Because of the many people Ren killed, and the kind of lifestyle he led before he met Yoh, he may not be able to escape Di Yu…"

"You're kidding…" HoroHoro whispered. He looked around. "That's a lie! We'll be able to get Ren back, right? Pin-Mei came back! Why can't we bring Ren back too?" No one looked at him. Zhang was on the floor trying to comfort Hua and both seemed to ignore him. "Right?" Everyone just stared at the ground. "COME ON!"

Rong put her hand on his shoulder. "HoHo…the only reason why Pin-Mei was able to come back was because Lady Hua extracted her soul from her own body and put it back into Pin-Mei's after healing it. We…we don't have that sort of option with Ren. Unless there's something here I don't know about, which I doubt, there's no way for Ren to come back. He's gone, Horo, he's gone."

He angrily shrugged her hand off him. "Don't tell me that. It's bullshit," he said in a low voice. "Ren's coming back, whether you have faith or not"

He began walking away from the group and over to Ren's now cold and almost grey body. Rong clenched her fist and followed him. She stood behind him and watched as he stared down at the body. She opened her mouth a couple times, but always closed it when she realized she didn't know what to say. Finally, she found the words.

"I know that you probably don't want to hear this, but I know what you're feeling," she said in a loud whisper.

His head turned slightly, then looked down again. "Sure you do."

"No, I really do. I was feeling the way you are now when Pin-Mei died," she asserted. "I wanted to give up. I honestly did. The only reason I kept my chin up and fought was because Ren believed that she'd come back. Even though I said I believed him, in the corner of my heart, I doubted him. I didn't believe in his ability to defy destiny." She chuckled softly at herself. "I guess that's just the power of love. It just makes it all the more clear to me that I was just possessive of her, that I must not have loved her at all. If I did, I would have been the one telling everyone that she'd come back…"

"…Yeah…"

She gave him a sad smile, one that he couldn't see. "I know that you're in the same boat as me, HoroHoro," she said. "You cared about Ren, but he didn't feel the same way. It's written all over your face."

He flinched slightly.

"_I…don't feel the same way…What a foolish thing to say..."_

"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone…but I want you to know that you don't have to be alone, alright?"

He didn't say anything. Rong rolled her eyes a little bit, acting as though she didn't care.

"If you ever want to cry to me about this sort of thing, I'll be willing to sit down with you and let you bitch and moan all you want, but only every once and a while. If you do it all the time I'll smack you."

She waited for some sort of reaction, but got none. Feeling a little awkward and stupid, she rubbed the back of her neck as she looked at the ground.

"Well…um…I'll give you some time to be alone, because I'm guessing that's what you need-slash-want right now…So just…take your time."

She turned and started walking away, but was stopped. She looked back to see HoroHoro's hand on her wrist. His head was lowered, but she could still see a veil of red on his face. Rong watched as he let his hand slip from her wrist to grasp hers.

"Hey…Will you stand with me a little while longer?"

She stared at him, then at their hands, and then back again. A faint shade of pink covered her cheeks as she turned back around to take her place beside him.

"Sure."

* * *

Pin-Mei finally lifted her head.

_The last attack I have…I've never used it before…I didn't learn it from Mom's book, so I don't know if I even developed it right…Please…just work…_

She called Wei Shan's spirit over to her, as well as Yan's. Spirits came from the plushies and surrounded her in a circle of small flames. She took a deep breath and held her hand out.

"Li-Ling!"

The flower guardian appeared before her. "Hai, Jouchama!"

"Hyoi Gattai in Song Blade!"

She looked up, taking another breath.

_Here goes everything…_

"ROLL!"

The spirit flames swirled around her like a twister, eventually congregating on the ceiling in a pool of light. Pin-Mei raised Shan's blade in the air.

"SOUL ROULECT!" She held her hand out. "WEI SHAN! HYOI GATTAI!" The ball of flame landed in her palm and she forced it into her chest, allowing it to integrate with her body. When she raised her eyes, they were cold, like Shan's.

She charged toward Suo with the sword held at her waist behind her. Suo waved her hand over her fan and it changed into a blade as well. They clashed, although Suo seemed to be putting next to no effort into the deadlock. She pushed her off and Pin-Mei fell to the ground. As she was getting up, Suo's blade glowed and she propelled her high into the air.

The spirit left Pin-Mei's body and she raised her hand again. "Tao Da-Xia! Hyoi Gattai!" she cried as another spirit entered her.

As her eyes opened, she somersaulted and landed on her feet. She gracefully raised her sword with a Tai Chi style stance. Her eyes were warm and calm, despite not having a smile; an obvious influence of the spirit possessing her.

In the blink of an eye, Pin-Mei was right behind her opponent. As Suo gasped and turned to look at her, she was met with a swift roundhouse kick that sent her to the floor.

The others watched with wide eyes.

"How did she suddenly get so fast?" Yoh wondered aloud.

"It's Da-Xia…" Jun whispered. "She was known as one of the only women in Cathay to master the Taoist Tai Chi sword style…That was one of the reasons why she married into the Tao family…but…she was killed by her own family for marrying Tao Yi, the heir at the time, because of the ongoing feud between Tao and Qiao families…"

"How sad…" he whispered.

"But that's the style she's using now, and that's why her speed is so great."

As they looked back over, Pin-Mei was yanking her grandmother up by her robes, her sword at the woman's throat. She glared down at her.

"Although Tai Chi is not supposed to be used to take another person's life, I'm sure an exception can be made for you…"

Horrified, Suo looked around for something to help her. Her hand moved behind her, and she felt something wet. She looked at her hand and saw blood, realizing that a small puddle of it was there. Quickly, she grabbed some and threw it in Pin-Mei's eyes.

Pin-Mei dropped the sword and stumbled backwards, trying to clear her vision. When she finally looked up, her grandmother slapped her face with her fan, sending her to the ground. Da-Xia's spirit left her as she tried to sit up, only to have her face stomped on.

"Hm…you seem to be dominated by people against your will a lot, don't you?" Suo cackled. She took her fan, the blades exposed, and cut off the faux tongari.

"Learn your place, Pin-Mei," she continued. She stepped on the girl's throat, causing her to cough. "You're a disgrace to the Xu family. You can't mix medicine, and your other medical skills are below par, and that's being too generous. I could never allow you to wear the Fan family name. You can't do curses or illusions. You're an outcast, Pin-Mei. Now what family do you think will be willing to take in a failure like you? Does that family even exist?"

"T...Ta…" she coughed, gasping for air.

Suo let her foot up a little bit. "What was that?"

"THE TAO FAMILY!" she shouted. "Ren already gave me my name…so I'm as good as in now…That's the family I belong with!"

Suo frowned, then sneered. "Tao Ren is DEAD Pin-Mei. They have no further use for you. All you were needed for was to produce heirs in an effort to revive the family. They were using you. It was just luck that he developed feelings for you. You're not welcome in their house anymore. Not without Ren."

"Ren's coming back…"

"What did you say?"

Pin-Mei lifted her head. "He's coming back. I'll bring him back, even if I have to spend my whole life finding a way, I'll bring him back. Too many people will miss him. This is where he belongs."

_It's a promise, Ren…_

* * *

The light still wasn't getting any closer. Ren's legs were getting tired. Part of him wanted to stop, but he knew that wasn't an option.

_I have to make sure that Suo's defeated. I can't let her screw up people's lives anymore.  
_

Suddenly, he saw a flame. He skidded to a stop as it grew and took shape.

Asakura Hao.

"Ah, Ren. It's been a few years. How have you been?"

Ren clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. "MOVE HAO – **NOW!**"

"Your explosive temper hasn't changed. I wonder what _has_ changed about you."

Ren tensed. Hao just smiled at him.

"Oh, Pin-Mei is it? How cute…You're willing to ruin your legendary family bloodline for that bastard child." His smile grew wider. "So she's the reason why you're here."

Ren's fists were bleeding. "What the fuck do you want?" he half yelled.

Another wicked smile. "It's gotten a little lonely in the Chamber of Avici as of late. No one is on the platform with me, so I can't have you leaving me all alone. I need company."

"That's because you PUSHED them in! Isn't that right?"

"Maybe, but I don't like sharing my space with humans. Speaking of which, I don't want you to go back and make a mistake. Just allow your family to die. It's so much better than to have a half-breed like her bear your offspring." Hao laughed. He knew he was getting under Ren's skin.

His eyes flared. "DON'T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT PIN-MEI LIKE THAT!" He ran and lunged at him, but Hao nimbly dodged and singed his back.

He shook his finger at him. "That's no way to treat someone who's trying to do you a favor."

"Sorry, but the Tao family doesn't accept favors."

Ren's eyes widened. That hadn't been his voice. He looked behind him to see Tao Yi with his Houraiken pointing at Hao.

"Yi-!"

"Go Ren!" he cried. "We can take care of this little twerp!"

Ren's eyes widened. "'We'?"

He squinted and saw Faust and Eliza appear from the shadows. The doctor smiled.

"Nice to see you again, Ren-kun."

"Faust…"

He squinted some more. His eyes widened in what could have been horror.

"Ch-Chrom…"

The priest appeared behind his friends. Ren froze. Why would Chrom help him after how he had mercilessly killed him during the preliminaries?

"It's alright, Ren," Yi reassured him. "Chrom volunteered. Something about how priests must not be biased against anyone or some spiritual mumbo-jumbo like that. Now GO! Pin-Mei needs you!"

Ren backed up a few steps. He looked at Hao, then Yi, then Faust, then Chrom. _How can I leave like this?_

"Go, Tao Ren,"

He looked up to see Chrom nod at him. He nodded back.

"Thanks."

Yi smiled. "Great. Go get her, Lover Boy!"

"You'll pay for that!" Ren yelled as he ran past Hao.

Hao glared at them. "Foolish souls."

Yi shrugged as he readied his Houraiken. "Family trait, what can I say?" He looked at his team. "Okay, kid, it's time we put you in time out."

Hao just smirked.


	49. Braveheart

Don't forget! Ren's birthday is next Monday! -totally DOESN'T have a huge party planned for her plushie, complete with cupcakes and Pin-the-Star-on-Hao…-

**Notes: Just to make sure everyone knows this "Chuuka" as in "Chuuka Zanmai" means "Chinese", (leaving "Zanmai" as "deadly dance). "Kanpai" is what you say in Japanese instead of "cheers!". It can also mean "complete defeat".**

**To tell you the truth, I think Ren's ambidextrous. He holds Houraiken in both his right and left hands, and it's hard to tell when he uses his Kwan Dao. **

**I take some ideas from the manga here, thus some spoilers for the end of it.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Forty-Nine: Braveheart (Moonlit Version)**

* * *

Pin-Mei hit the wall. The stone around her crumbled and she fell to the ground. Yoh and HoroHoro moved to go help her, but Rong stopped them.

"Don't help her. She hasn't asked for your help, so don't help her," she said sternly. "If she wants so much to be like Ren and be part of the Tao family, then treat her as such. Respect her pride. If she wants your help, she'll ask for it."

Pin-Mei stood slowly, panting slightly. She winced as she touched her left arm.

"Darn it…"

She stared across the room at Suo, whose mouth was turned up in a devilish grin.

"Where was that killing intent that you had a few minutes ago, Pin-Mei? Hmmm?" She laughed. "Honestly, the two of you really ARE meant for each other. Instead of your feelings for one another making you stronger, they only make you weaker! Ren's resolve was so much greater before Rong stepped in, and so was yours before Ren himself stopped you! Honestly, can't you children do anything right?"

Pin-Mei ignored her and looked around for a weapon. The shattered pieces of the Song blade lay in front of her, the second weapon to be disposed of.

_Darn it…I'm running out of swords…Come on! Just give me something with a stupid blade on the end!_

She turned to her right, and then she saw it.

Ren's Kwan Dao.

She stared long and hard at it, trying to bring back the day he had shown her briefly how to use it.

"_First hold it -. Then - to attack. - to defend yourself. Make sure you -."_

_And I'm supposed to have a GOOD memory._ She sighed and looked at it again. It was more than a hundred yards away. _How can I get it, though? There's no way… _Her eyes widened.

_My only hope is to snap…and pray that it comes over._

She raised her hand in the direction of the weapon. It quivered.

_I don't think I can do this…What if it doesn't come? Then what'll I do?_

She let the hand fall. Rong saw this and cupped her hands on either side of her mouth.

"Hey, Ren-Mei! What with all this 'I'm not sure of myself boohoo' crap?" she yelled over. Pin-Mei lifted her head and looked at her, slightly stunned. "Be a man and kick the shit outta that old hag!"

"And we don't mean Rong!" came HoroHoro's voice.

"That's right! We don't mean Ro—HEY WAIT A MINUTE!" She turned and wrapped a leather whip around his neck. "Behave, slave!"

He gurgled in reply.

"Heh, good dog." She turned back to Pin-Mei. "If you want to be like Ren, then you've got to dispel that doubt from your mind! He sacrificed himself without a second thought, and you have to be the same way!"

"Wait…what if she dies again?" the whipping boy asked glancing up.

"Then they get to be together. But Pin-Mei has to do as her heart tells her, or she'll have no chance against her grandmother, who embodies all the hate and sorrow and anger, and all the darkness she has in her heart. As long as she has no regrets, then I don't have any either." She lifted her chin as she cupped her mouth again. "So do it! Give her hell like Ren would have wanted you to!"

Pin-Mei still stared at her. Then she gave a small grin and lifted her hand once more.

_If you don't come over here, I'll snap you in half, you stupid sword-stick._

She snapped her fingers.

The whole room seemed to stand still. Every second seemed like an hour to her. Finally, she smirked.

The blade shook and rose from the ground. It sailed towards her and she snatched it.

She smiled slightly. _Thanks, Ren._

Hua had finally stabilized herself and stood next to Rong. "It seems that Ren's been watching over her the whole time. Or at least, the part of his soul that's remained in Bason-tou has."

Yoh cocked his head slightly. "What do you mean?"

She turned to him. "Remember what I said about the will of the sword? The previous user's soul is emblazoned into the weapon, but the more recent the death, the slower the reaction. That's why it took a few seconds for Bason-tou to respond. Ren's in there, even if it's just a little bit." She smiled

Pin-Mei yanked the clips out, her hair only falling to her hips, where they had reached her thighs before. She tossed her head and put the clips back in, the tongari reappearing.

"Ren liked my long hair…Cut it again and I'll make your death even more painful than I had planned," she said in a dark voice.

She charged and swiped the Kwan Dao at her target. Suo sidestepped it.

"Give her a Chuuka Zanmai, Pin-Mei!" HoroHoro cried.

"A Chinese what?" she called back before promptly being hit with a blast of wind.

Anna scoffed at him. "What makes you think that just because she has his weapon she can perform his attacks? Would you expect her to be able to use Nipopo Punch if she had your Ikupasuy?"

He stared at the ground. "I guess you're right."

Another swipe. Another sidestep. No matter how many times she swiped at her, it never made contact.

"Grrr…What is it with you old people and being able to sidestep my attacks?" she growled angrily.

Suo laughed. "The boy is so much faster than you, dear. You might as well be walking towards me." She nodded to a kyonshii, who appeared and landed a blow that sent Pin-Mei against the wall once again.

"Dammit, dammit, FUCKING DAMMIT! Why can't I do a fucking thing?"

"Ren said no swearing!" Rong called over.

Pin-Mei snapped her head over at her, her eyes filled with angry tears. "Shut up! Just SHUT UP!" she screamed. "I know it was only Yoh pretending to be him! You think I couldn't tell the difference between Ren and someone else?" She clenched her fists as she looked at the ground and closed her eyes. "I knew it was only Yoh! Ren never told me how to act!"

"Fine, then I'll say it now: Stop swearing. It doesn't sound right in your voice."

Her eyes shot open. She looked up. The spirit of her fiancé was standing before her, leaning over and supporting himself with his hand on the wall. "R-R-Ren?"

He smirked down at her. "Hey."

She quickly stood up and threw her arms around him. "I can't believe you're here…But still, I'm so glad…Everything seems so much harder without you here…"

He slowly wrapped his arms around her. "That's because you made it that way. You're trying too hard. You began doubting yourself the first time you hit the ground," he said softly, knowing he had to be firm, but at the same time only wanting to soothe her muddled heart.

"Please help me, Ren…I…I don't know what to do anymore…"

He sighed and placed his hand on her head. "Alright, brat. I'll help you, but only if you stop crying."

She instantly stepped back and wiped her eyes. When she was done, she stood rigidly in front of him in a saluting position, smiling. "Yes Sir!"

He couldn't help but give a small smile. This was the Pin-Mei he knew and loved. "Alright. Let's go." He became a spirit ball and entered her.

She freaked out, her face turning red. "R-Ren! Don't you think this is a little…um…?"

"Listen, if you want my help, then you're going to get it, so don't complain about the methods. I can't feel your body, and you can't feel mine, so just settle down," he said firmly.

"O-Okay…" she replied, her voice still shaky. She gripped the Kwan Dao tightly as she took a battle stance.

"There's your first problem."

"What?"

"You're holding it the wrong way."

"Again - what?"

"You're left handed so you have to hold it left-over-right, not right-over-left like I do." He moved her hands to the correct position. "There. Much better."

She stared at her hands. She could see the outline of his on top of them. "But won't it be harder for you?"

"This weapon was practically my baby rattle; I'll be able to adapt."

"Okay…"

"Enough hesitation. What I want you to do is charge."

She looked confused at the lack of game plan. "Charge?"

"Did I stutter? CHARGE!"

The sound of him shouting made her jump slightly and she obeyed, sprinting across the room. A kyonshii appeared in front of her.

"Left!"

She went left.

"Now turned back around and jump. Then cut down the center of its back!"

Pin-Mei back flipped and rode the blade down the ground. The two halves fell on either side of her. She stared at them in awe.

"Wow…I'm amazing!"

"Heh." Ren sensed others around them. "Hope you're done with the warm-up exercises, because there are a few more to go."

With a new found confidence in herself, she smirked and resumed her stance.

He looked down at her hands, and then cleared his throat. She looked also and saw her error. "Left over right, right!" she declared proudly.

"GO!"

Following Ren's instructions, she sliced through the four Kyonshii that had presented themselves. As she breathed a sigh of relief, a shadow fell over her. She looked behind her and saw one last kyonshii making its way over to her.

"One more for the corpse pile?" she said with a grin. She rushed at it, holding the Kwan Dao like a jumping pole.

"Wait what are you doing?" Ren cried. "You don't use it like that!"

She ignored him and jammed the blade into the ground in front of the cold corpse. It hoisted her into the air as she pulled the weapon from the ground. She did a somersault and cut down the center of it. The kyonshii turned to dust. Ren said nothing.

She landed and brushed off her shoulder. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Don't get too haughty, Pin-Mei dear. You haven't won yet," came a cackle from across the room.

Pin-Mei turned to glare at Suo as Ren left her body. "'Yet' being the key word," she said sharply.

Ren narrowed his eyes at her. "At least now I know why you're so determined to destroy the Tao family, after talking to Yi that is."

Suo looked shocked. "What?"

Yi appeared next to Ren. "Yo, Aibou! The crew and I finished with that fire guy. We smoked him! Haha! I'm so good…"

Ren shot him a death glare. He flinched.

"Honestly, if you weren't about to say something important, I'd kill you."

Yi cautiously looked up over the shield of his hands. "But I'm already dead…"

"Doesn't mean I can't kill you twice."

Pin-Mei sweatdropped. "Wasn't he going to say something important?"

Yi straightened. "Ahem. Yes I was." He stood tall and proud. "I knew there was something familiar about you when I first saw you here. Your face, your vendetta against the Tao family…It all makes sense. Doesn't it…Qiao Suo?"

Suo flinched.

"That's Mother's maiden name…" Hua whispered. "What are you saying, Yi?"

Yi smirked. "What I'm saying is that she's carrying on the legacy of hatred that's been held by the Qiao family towards the Tao family for more than a millennium. THAT'S why she originally wanted Yan to marry En, and that's why she's so intent on destroying the Tao family now."

Suo was shaking in anger.

"But then…" Pin-Mei whispered. She took a few steps toward her mother. "Mom! That wasn't the reason why you wanted me to marry Ren was it? Please tell me it wasn't!"

"It wasn't, Pin-Mei. You have no need to worry," Zhang reassured her as he allowed his wife to cry into his chest. "Your mother met Ran through the relations the two families shared. She honestly felt that you'd be safe with Ren and his family. There was no malicious intent whatsoever."

Hua lifted her head to the couple, her eyes filled with tears. "Please believe me, Ren! It wasn't my intent to have something like this happen! I never wanted to hurt you or your family! I just wanted the two of you to be together! That was my honest intention!"

Ren studied her, then gave a very slight smile. "Both you and Pin-Mei…over apologetic to a fault." He held her daughter's hand. "Even if it was, I know that Pin-Mei would never agree to something like that."

"Ren…"

A spirit flame floated over to Pin-Mei and made some noises at her in an attempt at verbal communication. She raised her eyebrows.

"Yeah, of course you can take your real form. You don't need me to tell you."

The flame made a happy noise and glowed, taking shape as it floated over to Yi. When the light dimmed, Da-Xia stood before him. They stared at each other. Yi finally reached out a hand to cup her cheek.

"Da-Xia…How long has it been?"

"Over one thousand, seven hundred years," she whispered.

They embraced tightly. As they kissed Pin-Mei looked at the ground, reminded of what she could no longer do.

"It's because of the both of you that the hatred was made stronger!" Suo yelled.

Yi and Da-Xia looked up. "What do you mean, 'because of us'?" Yi growled.

"Because Da-Xia married into your family, she was killed! If the defenses of the castle had been stronger, she wouldn't have died!"

"Wait, wait, HOLD ON," he said, releasing his wife. "Are you saying it's _my family's_ fault Da-Xia died?"

"Exactly! If you had protected her better, she wouldn't have died!"

Yi bowed his head and clenched his fist, his eyes wild. "You are so lucky I'm not alive right now." His head snapped up. "If I was…I'D WALK RIGHT OVER THERE AND RIP YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF!"

The whole room jumped. The young man who had been submitting to Ren since he arrived was now appearing as ruthless as it would be expected of a member of the Tao family. It was a most sudden, unexpected change.

"You have NO FUCKING IDEA the type of hell I came home to. NONE!" he yelled. "My wife was lying on the ground, cut open…our child who hadn't even gotten a single chance at living was cut up on top of her…That child had NOTHING to do with us going against our families! It was innocent! It had done nothing wrong!" A few tears fell from his eyes. "I tried to stay behind! I really did! I didn't want to go on that mission! I tried so hard to get out of it! No man would ever want to leave his pregnant wife behind by herself…YOU killed her! Her own family killed her! So don't preach to me about who's at fault!"

Da-Xia touched his face. "Don't cry, Yi. It's so unbecoming for a man of your stature." She smiled.

He just stared at her. "Da-Xia…" He turned back to Suo. "You targeted Ren and Pin-Mei because you saw the two of us in them. That's why you're so determined to kill them!"

Suo smirked. "True. I used Pin-Mei to lure Ren here. I knew he'd come. Why wouldn't he? I knew that Pin-Mei would sacrifice herself to save him. Seeing her die would cause him so much pain…It was exactly what I wanted. Then Ren would die somehow. Pin-Mei would return by that same chance and see her beloved dead on the ground…" Pin-Mei winced as she looked over at Ren's body. "…but unlike Ren, Pin-Mei wouldn't be able to fight properly, and would die in the process of avenging her one and only love. Then, the circle would be complete. With no heir to carry on family, the Tao legacy would finally come to an end."

"How dare you go after Ren you bit—I mean witch!" Pin-Mei cried.

Suo smiled at her. "Pin-Mei, would you like to know something interesting?"

Her stance wavered. "What…?"

"Three years ago, after the threat faced at the Shaman Fight was over and done with, do you know who had the lowest furyoku level of Ren and his little friends?"

Pin-Mei stiffened, as did Ren. "Wh-Who?"

"Ren," Suo said with a laugh. Pin-Mei looked back at him, their eyes meeting. His lowered in shame after a few moments. "His heart wavered so much that his furyoku refused to grow. The level of furyoku someone has depends on the determination in their heart. Since Ren was so confused, he was unable to get stronger. Yet here he is telling you to cast doubt away from your heart! HA!"

Pin-Mei had looked away from him and was now looking at the ground.

"How does it feel to have such a weak man as your fiancé?" she laughed.

"It feels…fantastic."

"WHAT?"

Pin-Mei looked up, smiling. "Ren's not weak at all. I was confused up until a few minutes ago, but that doesn't mean I can't be sure of myself tomorrow." She looked back at Ren. "I can feel it. Ren's the strongest now. He grew up and he learned how things were and where he wanted his heart to be. He wouldn't try to guide me if he didn't."

He looked at her, shocked.

"No matter what actually happened, in my heart, Ren will always be the Shaman King to me." Her smile brightened. "I love him with all my heart. Nothing could ever make me feel otherwise, especially not something as small as that."

She coaxed him and he integrated with her once again.

"His strength is so warm, that if I were to deny its existence, it would mean that I had no sense of feeling at all." She looked down, her hand on her heart. "I trust you with all my heart, Ren…Tell me what to do next."

"Pin-Mei…" Then he heard a voice.

"**Thirty seconds, Tao Ren."**

_I can't tell her…_ "Charge!"

"Right!" She sprinted towards Suo at full speed.

"She'll probably try to get you with her fan, so when that happens, I want you to…"

Pin-Mei didn't noticed his unfinished sentence, nor the sudden lack of warmth in her body.

"Strategies won't work for you any longer! Zhouy-,"

She stopped and looked down. Pin-Mei was on her knees, Bason-tou impaling Suo through the stomach.

"Chuuka Kanpai…bitch."

Pin-Mei brought the blade straight up, slicing through her, then sliced her again at the waist. The halves fell back in a bloody mess. Despite this, she jumped up, looking pleased with herself.

"How was that, Ren?"

No answer.

"Ren?"

She looked around.

"Ren!"

He wasn't there.

"**REEEEEENNN!"**


	50. Omokage

If this was a real anime, this is the part of the story which would spawn all the Ren/Hua fangirls. Haha. -shot for pretending her fic is anime, and thus canon- Ow... -shot again for good measure-

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty: Omokage (Face, Look, Vestige, Trace)**

* * *

Pin-Mei ran from side to side, her eyes wide.

"Ren! Where are you? Where'd you go? Ren! Please answer me!"

The others watched her with grim and sympathetic faces. They had seen him leave, and most of them knew he wasn't coming back.

She collapsed on the ground. "No…not again…I don't want to lose him again! COME BACK!" She put her head in her hands and cried, though the sound was hardly muffled. "Please come back to me Ren…Please…"

Da-Xia nudged her husband. "Darling, say something to her."

"What? Why me? You're at least ten times better with children! You know that!" he protested. "She needs another girl right now, not me!"

"But darling, I think you can comfort her because of your connection with Ren. Please, just try…For me?"

He looked into her pleading eyes, and finally relented. "Alright, but only because you asked me to."

Yi strode over to the now crying girl, scratching the back of his neck, searching for the right words.

"Listen…Pin-Mei is it?...I'm sorry about Ren. I know that you two were-,"

"It's okay, Yi," she whispered interrupting him. "I'm alright…It's times like these that Ren would have wanted me to be strong and do what I have to do, not cry like some little baby…but…" She turned to look at him, tears streaming down her face. "…I really don't think I can do that right now. Pathetic isn't it? Not the way the wife of the heir to one of the most powerful families in China should act, right? Yeah…" She turned back around and looked at the ceiling. "Ren…"

"We can go look for him together, if you'd like."

"What?"

Pin-Mei looked down again. In front of her stood a demon with long hair and a pompous, if not simply fake, smile. Yoh stepped forward, an uncharacteristic anger on his face.

"HAO!"

Hao turned and acknowledged him. "Hello, little brother. Nice to see you again." He shifted his attention back to the distraught girl in front of him. "I'm also very eager to find Ren," he said. "Just as eager as you are. So doesn't it make sense for us to look for him together?"

He held out his hand to her. She stared at it.

"But doesn't that mean that I'll…have to die again?"

"Well of course, but not to worry, I can take care of that. Now what do you say? Shall we go?"

She motioned to put her hand in his, but then flinched and retracted it.

"I…I'm not sure…" She looked away slightly.

Hao gave her a faux confused look. "Don't you want to be with your beloved?"

"I do...more than anything…but…"

His eyes narrowed in annoyance. "But what?"

"But…"

"But you're supposed to clear it with her parents before you ask for her hand." Zhang stepped in front of his daughter as the rest of the shamans surrounded Hao. The pyro shaman spun angrily as he looked at all their faces.

"Guess I didn't beat you enough to make you learn your lesson. I guess you can't teach an old shaman new tricks," Yi said cracking his knuckles. "Ah well, I'm all set for another round."

"We won't let you have Lord Ren OR Lady Pin-Mei," Rong said as she tugged on her sectioned whip.

Beside her, HoroHoro over souled Ikupasi. "You just don't know when to quit, do you Hao?"

Yoh glared at his brother. "I don't know how you got back here, but you're not staying long." He integrated Amidamaru in Harusame and pointed it at the fiend before him. "I'm going to make sure of it."

Hao scoffed at him. "While I would enjoy the nostalgia of another battle with all of you, I have to decline. I have other things to do, as you may have heard." He grinned. "But be sure that I'll see you all again. And don't worry about Ren...I'll keep him company...until he bores me." He laughed and vanished.

Hua sighed. "Why do the evil ones have to be such cuties? Not fair."

"Hua…" Zhang whispered.

"Hm?"

He motioned to Ren's body, where Pin-Mei was now sitting and clutching it.

"I'm sorry, Ren," she whispered. "I don't know how to bring you back right now…I'm so sorry." She lost all the composure she had feigned and cried into the cold shoulder. "I don't know what to do anymore without you here…It doesn't seem worth it…I…I…"

She stopped as she felt something cold on her cheek.

_What?_

She looked up. Her eyes widened.

It was snowing.

"But it never snows here…" she whispered. "What does this mean?" She looked down at Ren. "It's impossible…" She let out a small gasp. "If this is happening…and it's impossible…then…does that mean that the impossible…is actually possible?"

She stroked his hair, giving a slight smile. Then she stopped.

"No, I was wrong. There IS a way. I AM going to bring you back. I promise."

She stood and produced two small knives. "I'm going to do this."

Pin-Mei positioned her arms so that a blade was against each wrist. She inhaled before quickly slashing them. Rong and the others ran over to her.

"What are you doing, Milady?" Rong yelled to her.

Pin-Mei dropped the knives and knelt beside Ren again. She smiled at her mother.

"I'm going to do it, Mom," she whispered, tears in her eyes. "I'm going to use the Soul Search."

Everyone looked at Hua, whose eyes were wide.

"Hua, what is the Soul Search?" Zhang asked.

"The Soul Search," Hua whispered. "A resurrection technique where the user uses their blood to make a connection to the otherworld and goes to search for the soul of their beloved. The price is if they find the soul they're looking for, the life of the user is sacrificed to bring that one back…If they, by some chance, do survive, memories of the person may be taken away. Maybe a few, maybe all of them."

Pin-Mei smiled at her. "Just be sure to tell Ren I love him when he comes back, okay?" She turned back to the body as she got ready to hold it. "Now…SOUL SEAR-"

She stopped as she was stabbed through the chest. Pin-Mei looked across from her where Hua had grabbed Bason-tou and thrust it into her own daughter.

"Mom…why…?"

"If you do this, then the cycle will never end, and you two will never be together. I can't let this go on. I'm ending it now. You're staying." She smiled sweetly. "Mother knows best." As Pin-Mei closed her eyes and collapsed, Hua grinned. "I've been waiting for a chance to say that."

Rong took Pin-Mei in her arms, splashing some elixir on the wound to tide her over. Everyone watched Hua take the knives and slash her wrists, gathering the blood in her hands. She looked at them, still smiling.

"I trust that none of you have any objections?"

No one said anything.

"Good, because I want it this way. I'm not supposed to be alive to begin with. I'm only putting things back the way they should be." She looked at Pin-Mei's now sleeping form. "The whole time I've been here, I have only caused my daughter more pain. I thought I could be a great mother just like I had wanted, but it's apparent that it's not what I'm meant to be. For once, I'm going to do something to my make my only daughter, my only child, happy." She looked at Ren. "And that's bring back the boy I loved like a son."

Zhang looked at her sympathetically. "Hua…"

She smiled at him, a few tears in her eyes. "Think she'll ever forgive me?"

"She will, if she was ever mad at all," Yoh grinned. "She never got mad while I was around her anyway."

Zhang nodded. "She always put a picture of you next to her at dinner when Suo wasn't there, but always on her birthday. There's also a picture of you on her nightstand. She loves you Hua because she knows that you love her back. She knows you could have decided not to have her and live, but you chose her over yourself. She thanks you for that."

Hua nodded, more tears coming. "I wish I had gotten to know her better, like a mother should…but now…I have to bring back the person who knows her better than I ever could." She gave a small wave. "Goodbye. Nice meeting you all." She looked lovingly at Zhang. "See you soon." She smiled at Jun, who looked a little guilty. "Jun, smile. You were so much prettier that way. Besides, Ren will be back soon."

With that, she knelt beside Ren and held his hands. She suddenly looked back at Rong and HoroHoro. "Take care of one another. You both need each other." They both blushed.

"Wait," Yoh said. "Pin-Mei's blood is already on his hands. Does that mean…the thing about the memories…?"

Hua looked shocked as she gazed at Ren's hands. They were already red with her daughter's blood. She had no way of washing it off.

"I…I don't know, but if it does, I'll try to make sure it's something minor. I can't promise anything, though." She dipped her head. "I'm sorry."

"Ren would be so heartbroken if Pin-Mei didn't remember him…" Jun whispered.

"Like I said, I'll try," Hua said again. "I don't want that to happen either. I know how much it would hurt Ren." She nodded to them once again. "So long."

She held Ren's cold hands tightly. She took a deep breath, her last. "SOUL SEARCH!"

Hua's eyes rolled back and she fell on top of his body.

* * *

Ren could feel himself falling agonizingly slow towards the depths of Hell.

"_You assisted in a murder, so we've decided that it's straight to the Chamber of Avici for you. The world will be safer this way."_

If he had a heart anymore, it probably would have felt sad, but the court had allowed a pit stop in the Chamber of Heart-Digging and removed it, taking with it any feelings he had. As it was now, he was finding it hard to remember who he had left behind on Earth, and who was responsible for the deep wounds in his limbs, chest, and neck. It was getting to the point where he could hardly recall his own name.

_Mao…Bao…Dao…Was it Tao? Tao Ken? I can't remember…All I know is that I've sinned…and this is where I belong…I can't be where that person is…Where that person will be once they've died…That person I can't remember…_

Down, down he went, falling ever deeper into the despair which houses the eternally damned.

The falling suddenly stopped with a jerk. Someone was clutching his elbows, trying to bring him closer to them. He flailed his arms.

"Don't…don't touch me…" he murmured.

"I'm sorry, Ren, but I have to. Someone will be upset in the long run if I don't. Please, let me. I promise I won't hurt you," a gentle voice said. A soft hand stroked his cheek. The muscles in his arms relaxed as he felt something warm go inside his chest, and he allowed himself to be pulled against someone's bosom.

"Ren…Ren…"

He didn't shift his head.

"Ren…Ren, darling…" Fingers lightly tapped his head. "Ren…That's you…Ren…"

"Ren…" he whispered back.

"There's a good boy. Look at me, Ren."

He gazed up at her with child-like innocence. Hua looked into his faded eyes sadly.

"It's okay, Ren," she whispered. "You have your heart back. You'll regain yourself soon…"

"I lost myself…?"

"Yes…When they took your heart, you began to lose yourself. Now that you have it back, you'll return to normal. I promise."

"Promise…I have an important promise to keep…To someone…two people…look the same…Can't remember…"

"It's alright, honey. It's still too early for that." She stroked his hair again, trying to calm him down. "Just relax…everything will come back on its own. Just wait."

"No…someone…someone…'I love you'…to someone…who…?...I don't know…"

Hua could tell just who he was trying to remember. She had been the first thing he thought of. _Oh Ren… _"Did someone say that to you? Or did you say it to someone?"

"To me…To her…Both…To me first…Then to her…"

"Good boy…Do you remember anything else about this person?"

"Long hair…smile…ring…butterflies…pictures…on a bridge…"

"Did she do anything for you that you liked?"

"Smiled at me…used my name…kissed me…slept beside me…She didn't care about who I used to be…"

She noticed how complete his thoughts were becoming. He had gone from one word, to two, to three, then a whole sentence. _That's right…Keep going…Keep going_

"I miss her…" he whispered.

She smiled at him. "Be strong. You're going to see her soon. Be strong, like you usually are." She touched his face again and looked into his eyes, which were regaining their light. "What was her name?"

"Name…?"

"The person who told you they loved you…What was her name? Who did you say 'I love you' to?"

"I…I love you…P…P…Pi…Pin…Me…Mei…Pin…Mei…" His eyes shot open. "Pin-Mei…Pin-Mei…Pin-Mei!"

"Yes! Yes, Ren! That's right!"

He wriggled from her grasp and stared at her. "Hua? Why are you here?"

She smiled at him as she brushed back his bangs. "I came to release you from the unlawful binds those judges put you in. They were abusing their power…again. You don't belong here. You're going back."

He looked at her quizzically. "To limbo?"

"No, you're going back home. To China. To Tao Castle. To your family…"

"To Pin-Mei…"

She smirked slightly as she nodded. "That's right." She giggled. "I'm just glad you're back to your old self again. Although the helpless you was pretty adorable."

He blushed. "Don't be absurd. I'm never helpless." He softened as she laughed at him. "You know…Your voice…it sounded so familiar when I heard it. Almost like I had heard it years ago…like my conscience or something…"

She giggled again. "Like when?"

"Like when Pin-Mei was drowning…"

"_Go save her! She's drowning! Please! If you don't save her, she'll die!"_

"…or when I was going to go inside when she was crying…"

"_Comfort her…she's in pain…you're all she has right now…"_

"…and when I was looking for her in the rain…"

"_She's in the woods, hiding among the roots of the trees…go there, now!"_

"Even as recent as the night of our banquet…"

"_She's at the beach…"_

He stared at her. She was smiling again. "It was you all along, wasn't it?"

She looked innocent and shrugged, then giggled again.

"You've been watching over us the whole time. Even when we were fighting Hao."

"_Ren, you have to keep fighting…keep their hopes alive…lead them…"_

"Well, I don't know about _that_. That could have just been your own determination."

"My determination doesn't sound like a woman."

She shrugged, then pulled him close to her again. He blushed, uncomfortable with the position he was in. "But I meant what I said. You're going back. You don't belong here."

He looked away from her. "I do…I killed so many people…Even though I've tried to repent my past actions, the judges wouldn't forgive me, and I don't blame them. I'm a horrible human being…No…I'm not even human…Anyway, there's no way a sinner like me can escape hell."

She smiled at him again. "You can always get around the big guy if you go to his boss," she said.

His eyes widened. "What are you saying? You mean you spoke to…"

She nodded. "The King of Spirits. No one's controlling him now, so he's free to make his own decisions. I told him about you, and he wanted me to pass something on to you."

Hua pulled on Ren's arm so his left ear was near her mouth. She whispered something in it, and his eyes widened more, then quivered and glistened. A tear fell from each one as she released him. His right hand motioned to cover his mouth, but never made it there. Before more tears could come forth, Hua wiped his eyes.

"Hey, hey, now. Don't cry. You may want to save those tears for when you get back to the living world. I know there's someone who's going to use up all of hers on you."

She looked into his eyes, still smiling that kind smile of hers, happy tears in her eyes. She knew how much this meant to him. Those words he had been longing to hear for three long years. Thanks to her, he had heard them. She touched his lips.

"You won't be able to say anything else until you get back there, but I want you to know that even though you're not my son, I'm really proud of you. I couldn't have hoped for a better son-in-law." She kissed his forehead. "Thank you for loving my daughter."

Ren thrust his arms around her. Surprised, she hugged back, then gently pushed him away and watched him vanish. Hua turned as she heard her name called.

She watched as a young Kai ran and hugged her.

"Neesama…"

Hua smiled down at him, then to herself as she remembered the words the King of Spirits had asked her to deliver to Ren.

"_For your sins, Tao Ren, you are forgiven. Walk on Earth with a cleansed heart and care-free spirit. I say again, **you are forgiven**."_


	51. If You Are My Love

**Notes: The italicized section is a dream Pin-Mei has.**

"**Fufufufufu" is the traditional Japanese bad guy laughter.**

"**Ti liàn" means "purify".**

"**Bakana" means "nonsense/impossible/that's stupid", a phrase Ren uses many times in the anime.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-One: If You Are My Love**

* * *

HoroHoro gazed down at Ren's motionless body. He sighed.

"You better wake up soon. There's a cute girl who's going to be real sad if you don't."

"…Don't call my fiancée cute."

"Oh, sorry about that." He blinked, and then looked down again. Two yellow eyes stared up at him. "REN?"

Ren squeezed his eyes shut. "Shut up. I have a headache, and you're being obnoxiously loud."

"Sorry…" He turned to the others, waving his arms. "HEY YOU GUYS! REN'S AWAKE!"

Ren squeezed his eyes shut again as the others ran over.

"Ren!" Jun cried. She knelt beside him, wanting to hold his hand, then cradle him, but doing neither because of the overflow of emotions hitting her all at once. She just kept whispering his name over and over again.

Ren ignored her for a moment as Rong came into view.

"Rong."

"Yes, Milord?"

"Shut him up please." He used his head to motion to the blue-haired boy on his left.

"WHAT? WHAT DID I DO?"

Ren closed his eyes and grunted again. "As soon as possible."

"Ren, c'mon!" He started, but was stopped by the audible cracking of knuckles. He looked up to see Rong with a devilish look on her face. "Rong, Rong, come on. You wouldn't really hit me, would you?"

"You're making My Lord uncomfortable, HoHo. You know how I feel about that."

Ren looked from one to the other. _HoHo?_ "On second thought, I think the intimidation's enough. You can stop."

Rong sighed and lowered her fists, not saying anything except, "Yes, Milord." Ren studied her, and found what he was looking for, a look of relief in her eyes. He smirked, then made a move to get up.

"Hey, not so fast!" HoroHoro cried as Ren put pressure on his wrists in order push himself up.

He winced as his weight hit his ankles and his legs trembled. He looked at his limbs and saw simple red dots, like ink from a permanent marker, where the swords had hit him. His breathing came in gasps as the pain hit him. Alive or not, the pain he felt when he died was still there. Pain…in his heart.

"Where's Pin-Mei?" he asked, the words almost reluctant to leave his mouth, afraid of some sudden catastrophe.

Before anyone could say anything, Anna spoke first.

"She's dead."

Ren snapped his head up, his eyes wide.

"That's what you were afraid I was going to say, right?" She gave a small smile and stepped aside, revealing Pin-Mei's body on the ground behind her. "Well, she's not."

"Oi, Anna, that was harsh…" Yoh whispered.

Ren just stared at the body on the floor. He tried to run, but staggered, tripped, and headed for the ground. Rong swiftly slid across the floor and in front of him, catching him. He regained his footing, nodded at her, and continued on. When he finally reached Pin-Mei's body, he allowed himself to fall to his knees as he studied her. Her hair was down, released from the faux tongari. Her stomach was taped up, recovering from the wound her mother had inflicted on her. Suo's blood was splattered on her face, and Ren's shirt was drenched in it.

Ren took his sweatband off and carefully wiped the crimson liquid from her face. For a moment, all he could do was stare, but that quickly wore off. He held his hand near her mouth to affirm that she was, in fact, alive, and smiled faintly when he felt her moist breath against his fingertips. He wanted so much to hold her right then, but with the limited strength in his wrists at the moment, he doubted that he would even be able to drag her. Rong saw the yearning in his eyes and placed Pin-Mei in his lap, allowing him to cradle her.

Tears almost came, but he promised himself that he'd save it for when she could actually see him. Besides, he wasn't going to cry in front of the whole group. Alas, one snuck out, and he lowered his head and hid it behind hers, burying his face in her hair.

The group smiled, knowing that the battle had finally ended, and that the two lovers would be able to go home and finally be together. As Rong thought of this, her smile faded slightly. She knew there might not be a happy ending just yet. Knowing what she had to say, she knelt in front of him, clenching her fists on her knees.

"Um…Lord Ren?"

"What?" he whispered, his face still hidden behind his fiancée's head.

"There's something you need to know…"

His eyes peeked over Pin-Mei's head. "What is it?"

Rong stared into yellow mirrors of silent happiness. She felt like a mother who was about to return all of her son's birthday gifts.

"She…Lady Pin-Mei…She might not remember you…"

His head left his beloved's quickly, staring at her with wide eyes. "What the hell are you talking about? What do you mean she might not remember me?"

"Well…because…"

"It's alright, Rong. I'll explain this." Zhang came to sit before the boy, his face serious. "The reason you came back was because Hua used a sacrificial resurrection technique which allowed her to take your place and send your soul back to your body." He motioned to his wife's lifeless body a few meters away.

Ren stared at it. "She's not…_actually_ taking my place is she? She's not going to the Chamber of Avici, right?"

Zhang solemnly shook his head. "I don't know. I'll find out when I go back to look for her." He straightened. "Back to the subject at hand. In order to use this technique, she had to put her blood on her hands, and hold yours so a connection could be established."

Ren looked at his hands, not noticing them before. They were covered in dried blood.

"Before her, Pin-Mei was going to attempt to use that technique herself. Her blood is also on your hands. Hua stopped her before the connection was fully made, but because Pin-Mei's blood is already on you, there may be some side effects on her. Her memories of you may be lost forever."

Ren stared down at Pin-Mei's sleeping face. All those memories they had shared…gone? The time they had spent together ten years ago, his birthday, Tokyo…his proposal…all gone? A void made its way into his heart, leaving him with a dark and hollow feeling. He looked at her sadly.

"It doesn't matter," he said finally. The group watched him, confused. He smiled weakly. "It doesn't matter if she has no idea who I am. We'll do everything all over again. I'll treat her like the brat she is. I'll take her back to Tokyo and recreate those memories. I'll tell her what we are to each other. I'll do it all over, again and again until she remembers.

"No matter what happens…I won't give up on her.

**I never will.**"

"That…was so…beautiful!"

Ren looked up to see Yi bawling his eyes out in a comic fashion. Da-Xia patted his shoulder gently, looking as though she was used to his sensitivity. Ren glared at him.

"Now I'm beginning to think you were adopted."

Yi wiped his eyes. "Now that's just mean! Come on, Aibou, it's time to be HAPPY! You have your fiancée back and everything's going to be all hunky dory!" He laughed, but when he noticed that his descendant wasn't, he stopped abruptly. "Oi, Aibou, don't go emo on me now." He grabbed his shoulders and shook him. "YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!" he cried in a dramatic tone.

Ren punched him in the face. "You're really annoying."

Yi grinned. "Yeah, she said that when we first met." He used his thumb to point over his shoulder at his wife. "But she learned to love me, and you will too! We're going to spend quality time together and be bestest pals! Oh Aibou!"

He went to put his arms around him, but was met with a foot to the face.

"What did I tell you about touching me?"

"Do it, and do it often?"

"NO! NEVER DO IT! THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN TOUCH ME IS—"

He stopped and looked at the girl in his lap.

"…Pin-Mei…"

* * *

"_Hello? Someone? Anyone? Can someone tell me where I am?"_

_Pin-Mei wandered around in the darkness looking for any sign of life. Suddenly, a spotlight appeared behind her. She looked to see a toddler with long black hair and cruel eyes._

"_Why are you being so loud? You're so annoying…"_

_Pin-Mei stared at the girl. "Who are you?"_

_She scowled at her. "Do we really look that different?" When Pin-Mei didn't answer, the girl let out an annoyed sigh. "I'm you. I'm the darkness you try to hide from everyone. But that darkness came out when you fought that bitch."_

_Her older self could only hold her slightly frightened stare._

"_Do you think xxx is still going to love you after seeing that darkness?" the young heir questioned. "I doubt it. You blew it. Nice job. Now you're just going to have to live all alone and die an ugly old hag. You already have the ugly part down, now we just need the old part to kick in."_

_The young heir grabbed Pin-Mei's hand and led her further into the darkness._

"_Where are you taking me?" Her voice was shaking._

"_Fufufufufu…Don't you want to get out of here?"_

"_Y-Yes…"_

"_Then just keep quiet and follow me."_

_Pin-Mei swallowed and allowed the three year-old to lead her further into the darkness. They stopped when they came before some bubbles. In each one, Pin-Mei could see a memory. The lighter bubbles had happy memories, and the black ones had sad memories._

"_What are these?_ _Why are they here?" she asked turning to the little girl._

"_They're memories. Duh. They're here because it's with in that pea-brain skull of yours."_

_There was a popping sound. She whirled around and saw that the light colored bubble in front of her had vanished, a black one rising in its place. A dark feeling appeared in her heart, causing her to wince. Another pop, and another good memory was lost, replaced with an awful one. Pin-Mei fell to her knees as the popping continued. When it finally ceased, she looked at herself._

_She was four years old again._

"_What's going on?" she shrieked. _

_When she looked behind her, her fourteen year-old self came into view, a malicious grin on her face._

"_So where are those precious memories of xxx that 'kept you alive' now, hmm? What of xxx, who suddenly made your darkness fade away and made you toss me aside?" she cackled. She shoved Pin-Mei's head and she fell to the floor. The evil spirit laughed "So where is xxx now, hmm? Is He coming to save you?"_

_Pin-Mei looked at her, perplexed. "Who's 'He'?"_

_After staring at her for a moment, the spirit fully burst into laughter. "He used to be so important to you, but you can't even remember Him now! If only He could see this! How absolutely hilarious!"_

_More dark bubbles appeared. Pin-Mei was pinned to the ground in pain. "Stop it…it hurts…"_

_Her dark self flashed another evil smile. "You forgot these bad times because of Him. Now you can relive them all!"_

_Just as she felt as if she was going to suffocate, a soft, warm hand caressed her cheek._

"_Calm down," a voice said. "You'll be fine. He told me to come save you because he can't be here right now, and I would never disobey him."_

_She looked up to see a woman in her twenties with warm black eyes. She helped Pin-Mei stand up and stroked her again. Pin-Mei could see her long black hair that hung just above her ankles and elegant purple robes that trailed on the floor._

"_What are you doing here?" the evil Pin-Mei yelled over, her face creased in anger._

_The woman smiled. "I'm just showing her the way out. You were helping her find her way, weren't you? At least, that's what you told her, isn't it?"_

_Minbouken appeared and the spirit grabbed it. She smirked. "Without a weapon, you're as good as graveyard dirt, you old hag!"_

_The kind smile remained on the woman's face as the impostor charged at her. Calmly, not taking her eyes off her attacker, she reached into her sleeve and produced a fan. She spread it waved the fan at the spirit._

"_Ti liàn," she whispered._

_White light shined from the silk weapon and the specter dissolved with a pitiful scream. The woman knelt on the ground, a tired look on her face. Pin-Mei rushed to her side._

"_Are you alright?" she cried._

"_Yes, don't worry about me. You have to run from here."_

"_Why?"_

"_He's waiting for you. There are trials that may present themselves along the way, but you must overcome them. He's eager to see you, so you must get there as quickly as you can."_

_Pin-Mei cocked her head. "Who's 'He'?"_

_The woman looked at her sadly, but then forced a smile and put her hand on the shoulder of the four year-old body. "Just go. Don't worry about it now. You'll remember Him eventually." She pointed behind them. "Run along now, Pin-Mei."_

_Pin-Mei nodded slowly and ran in the direction the gentle finger told her to. As she vanished, the voice of a small child echoed in the darkness._

"_Mommy!"_

_The woman turned and smiled. A little girl with long navy blue hair ran to her and threw her arms around her. "Mommy! I was so worried about you! When you ran off, I got scared you'd get hurt!"_

"_I'm fine, sweetheart."_

"_Yeah, she's old enough to take care of herself. Both you and Father seem to forget that."_

_They looked behind them to see the girl's brother, a boy with firm limbs, purple hair and piercing yellow eyes. As he moved into the spot of light the two females were in, a tongari came into view._

"_Honestly, though…Tell her next time you have to go somewhere. She gets so damn worked up."_

_His mother smiled. "Alright I will." She giggled a little. "When you act like that, you remind me of your father."_

_Her son blushed. "B-Bakana…Foolish woman…"  
_

* * *

_Pin-Mei ran through the darkness, avoiding the creatures and ill spirits that appeared along the way. She felt the floor give way and she fell, landing in a pool below her. It wasn't until some of the liquid made its way into her mouth that she realized what it was._

_Blood._

_She screamed and flailed, but her limbs were suddenly captured by strong hands and pulled her deep into the pool. With the small, fragile body she was in now, she had no chance of escaping. She screamed, hoping help would come in some form. _

_The hands suddenly released her. Another one grabbed the collar of her shirt and yanked her up. After the blood was promptly cleared from her eyes, Pin-Mei examined the figure before her._

"_Rong?"_

_The maidservant smiled. "I'll always be here for you, Milady."_

_Her red hair was slightly longer, as if she had forgotten to trim it, and she was older, maybe thirty. As she set her Jouchama on the ground, she turned and pushed her in the direction of a spot of light. "Go there! Go! He's waiting for you, Milady!"_

_She obeyed with a confused nod. She followed the light and arrived at a plane full of grass and hovered over by a darkened sky. As she took a step forward, a bolt of lightning landed in front of her. Pin-Mei yelped and cowered, her instincts refusing to let her up just so she could find a better hiding place._

_She heard something between a roar and a groan, causing her to look up. A large yellow and purple spirit stood over her. Lightning came from the large spike that protruded from its head and its body seemed to be constantly sparking. Its large claw-like hands reached for her. She whimpered, building up to a scream and curled up into a ball, a poor defense mechanism._

"_Spirit of Lightning! That's enough!" a deep voice called._

_The elemental obeyed its master and flew over to him, its energy spiraling into a jewel of thunder. Houraiken. Pin-Mei cautiously looked up. The skies were clearing and the plain now seemed calm. Flowers and trees graced its landscape, and small animals scurried here and there. Only then did she notice the calm lake in front of her._

_She squinted as she stood up. There was a figure on top of the water. Not laying on it, not standing in it, standing **on top** of it. With cautious curiosity, she inched closer to the bank of the lake._

_It was a man, his back turned to her. Black and gold robes covered his body and he held Houraiken at his side. Squinting a bit more, she could see his long navy blue hair falling past his shoulders, some of it being held up in a clip. Part of her was still curious and wanted to examine the seemingly regal man before her, but as she looked down at the water, dread overcame her. She remembered she couldn't swim._

_The man suddenly spoke to her, causing her to look up again._

"_Come here, Pin-Mei."  
_

_His voice washed over her like a warm breeze, wrapping her in a tight embrace and calming her confused heart. She almost took a step towards the water, but looked down at herself. Her clothes were still covered in blood, and it was still wet._

"_I…I don't want to ruin your expensive clothes, sir," she whispered meekly._

_He sighed. "Fine. I'll make it so you don't have to worry about that." In one quick movement, he threw off the robes, allowing them to dissolve into the air. He now stood in a dark purple shirt with gold fasteners, black pants, and black slippers. "Now you have no excuses. Come here, Pin-Mei. Now."_

_The child fidgeted. "I can't swim. The water's gonna eat me!"_

_There was a slight chuckle. "The water won't harm you. I promise." He turned around to face her. A kind smile was on his face as he held his hand out to her. "Come."_

_Allowing her inhibitions to leave her, Pin-Mei took a deep breath as she slowly stepped onto the water. It rippled under her feet, but supported her without the slightest fault. Reassured, she began running toward her caller. With each step, she could feel herself returning to her true body. By the time she reached him, her fourteen year-old body had been restored._

_The man apparently had expected her to land in his arms, a look of slight disappointment on his face when she stopped in front of him. He dismissed the feeling as he pulled her close to him. Her eyes widened slightly, her body frozen, unable to return nor reject the embrace._

"_Why are you holding me?" she whispered._

_A barely audible sigh escaped him. "You really did forget. It's alright. It's not your fault."_

"_Forget? What did I forget?"_

_He looked into her eyes. "I don't look the least bit familiar to you?"_

_She studied him, then shook her head slowly. "No…No, I'm sorry, but I don't know you at all."_

_After a moment, he smiled weakly. "It doesn't matter. We'll just do everything again. Like we did before. Just us. With no one to take you from me…"_

_She inhaled as he kissed her neck. "This feels…familiar…"_

_He smirked at her. "You would remember that."_

_They looked around. Everything was going white. He smiled at her._

"_Good, you're finally waking up. Make sure you remember." He stroked her hair. "Now you'll be able to fly away like a butterfly without that woman around…I knew there was a reason why I bought those clips."_

"_Wait, but who are you? Can't you at least tell me?"_

_He looked into her eyes again. "You already know. I can see it in the way you're looking at me. Inside, you know who I am. I have nothing to fear…He has nothing to fear…"_

_She was beginning to vanish. "But wait! How do you know me? What am I to you?"_

_A cocky smile. "I know you better than anyone else. Because you…"_

_She vanished._

"…_are the best birthday present I ever received."_


	52. Her Feelings

I think this chapter is worth waiting for. It's nice and long, and loaded with fluff. Oh RenMei fluff, we missed you so.

One of my past ideas had been that in order to bring Ren back, Pin-Mei had to knowingly give up all her memories of him as a way of payment. Then I decided it would make the fic waaay too long to get all her memories back and scratched it. Plus, it was too Tsubasa-like.

**Notes: The Chinese New Year lasts for fifteen days. The last day is also known as the Chinese Valentine's Day (to some, but not all).**

**I recently changed the Cantonese at the end of the chapter since I thought it was a tad excessive...if I've messed up, please let me know.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Two: Her Feelings**

* * *

Slowly, Pin-Mei opened her eyes. A blurry picture quivered, then was finally brought into focus. She looked down at herself and the black over-sized silk shirt she had on. Definitely not hers. After quickly scanning the room, her eyes fell to her right. They widened.

Her elbow was bent, her lower arm off the mattress. She noticed her bandaged wrists.

_What did I do to myself?_

She looked closer. Two hands were grasping hers almost desperately. She followed the hands to their wrists, then arms, then to the body of a young man, his face down against the mattress. Wisps of his navy blue hair fell across his arms, and his tongari gently leaned against her hand. His eyes could not be seen under his bangs, and his breathing told her that he was somewhere between slumber and the living world.

All she could do was stare. Her mind was trying to register the sight before her, but nothing was coming up. Sadly, she looked at the boy before her. "I'm sorry." She felt her hand inadvertently squeeze the ones holding hers.

Instantly, his head snapped up, eyes wide awake and alert. He stared into her eyes, but she could only look back at his shocked expression in confusion. Before she could even think about speaking, Ren grabbed her and held her close to him, burying his head in the crook of her neck. Her eyes remained wide and oblivious.

"Pin-Mei…" he whispered.

_How does he know my name?_

"Your body's still cold, like it's always been…It's alright though, I don't mind…"

_Always been?_

"I've been worried, you know…"

_No…I don't know…_

"Part of me thought you weren't going to wake up…"

_Why do you even care?_

"But somehow I knew you would…"

_Get…_

He squeezed her tighter.

_Get away…Stop touching me…_

"Pin-Mei…"

_I don't know you…So don't touch me!_

She was about to push him away when she felt drops of water on her skin. Pin-Mei froze.

"Back there I was scared…no…I was so fucking terrified that I was going to lose you. You and your stupid selflessness…I should hate you for it…You make me a wreck when you do that." Ren raised his head to show her the few tears that were falling from his eyes. She seemed confused at his show of emotion, but he acted as though nothing was wrong, trying not to look even weaker than he already did.

He looked at her bandaged wrists. "If you ever do anything like this again." His eyes darted to her in an almost threatening glare. "I'll make you very sorry for it. I don't know what I'll do, but rest assured you won't like it. Don't scar yourself again, do you hear me?"

She just gave him a dumb stare, and he softened. He pulled her left arm to bring her closer to him and kissed her, putting his left hand on her back to keep her in place. For some reason, she allowed him to, not even attempting to fight his gentle touch. Even when his tongue pleaded entrance into her mouth, she permitted him to explore. When he released her, her eyes widened at the flow of tears falling down his cheeks.

_Why is he so upset?_

"Do you know what sort of hell I went through to get you back?" he asked her.

Another dumb stare.

"This month alone after being with you was so goddamn quiet that I couldn't concentrate for a single second. Some nights I couldn't even sleep. And it's your fault, you stupid brat."

He took her left hand which bore the ring he had given her and held it. She looked at it as though she had never noticed the glistening diamonds on her finger. "Still though…I couldn't be mad at you right now if I tried…I…"

He looked into her eyes again. He had had enough of trying to act tough. There wasn't a reason to be. With a reunion such as this…there was no room for a protected heart, only one with no walls or gates to guard it, one to let out raw emotion at its fullest.

Ren buried his face in her chest. "I'm so happy that you're back here. With me. I can't even say how much it means to me…After watching you die…"

_I…died?_

"All I could think about was you and avenging your death and getting you back…But it consumed me, and I was taken away from this world. When I was given those few moments to come back, I had to spend them with you and help you win the battle you were fighting. When they took me back and sent me to hell, I thought that was the end. I couldn't remember anything. But Hua…if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be here.

"You're the only reason I needed to come back here. If you had died bringing me back, I'd just kill myself again. Life just isn't complete anymore without you. You've infected me, I'm addicted. The only thing that will make it better is to have more. Without that, I can't go on."

She still made no move to hold or even touch him. Not a single word came out of her mouth. No emotion whatsoever. She was like a vegetable. Still, he had one more thing to say.

"Even if you never remember me, it doesn't change the fact that I remember everything about you. About us. I remember it all. I proposed to you on a beach in Tokyo on January 9th, 2002 at 9:48 PM. I could never forget a moment like that. You're my fiancée. In a few years you'll be my wife. And I love you more than anyone or anything in this world. Even milk. Memories or not, that will never change. Never. I promised you I'd always love you, and I'm going to keep that promise until my body turns to dust."

Then it hit her like a bullet to the head. Everything flashed in her mind like a high speed slideshow. As it got to the end, tears began falling.

_This person…This man is…_

"_**You don't understand! He was my world! He was the only reason I wanted to live!"**_

…_my world…the reason I'm alive…He's…He's…_

She crumbled over and wrapped her arms around him.

"Ren…"

He looked up at her in awe. "Pin-Mei…?"

Her forehead came to rest on the top of his head. "How could I ever forget even for a moment?" she whispered. "It's…unforgivable…After all you've done for me…For me to forget you…I can't forgive myself for it, but I'm hoping that you can."

Her tears dripped onto his cheeks as she took his face into her hands and kissed him. For the moment, she gave him no power, leaving him only able to take in the feeling of her lips against his. When she ended the kiss and slowly pulled away, she smiled at him sadly and wiped his eyes.

"No more crying, okay? It makes me nervous when someone as strong as you cries. It feels like something's really wrong."

He smirked. "Remember, I'm older than you. You can't order me around."

She smiled. "You're right. Sorry."

They stared at each other. A solid month had passed since they had been able to enjoy each other's company. The moments in that dark basement couldn't possible count. It was the first time since that fateful night that they were able to look at the other one and know that they would be alright, that they were in no danger whatsoever.

Her eyes welled up with tears once more as Ren straightened to her level. The sheets under her hands were balled up tightly as if she was trying to keep some emotions inside. Without warning, she leaped at him, knocking him over and sending both of them to the ground.

"Hey! What are you-"

"I'm sorry!" she whimpered. "It's just…It's just…" But whatever she was going to say was lost as her voice quivered and she began sobbing shamelessly into his chest. He sat up and eventually smiled down at her, then wrapped his arms around her.

"Heh…Fine, cry all you want. This isn't my good shirt or anything."

She sniffled. "M-Meanie…"

Suddenly, she was released and Ren flopped back down on the floor. Frantically, she sat up and shook him.

"Ren! Please say something!"

There was a chuckle.

"Don't worry, Milady. He's just exhausted."

Pin-Mei looked to see Rong leaning against the door frame. The guard smirked and left her post, making her way over to the now sleeping lord.

"How long was I sleeping?" the younger girl asked softly.

"Nearly a week," Rong replied. "Your mother must have stabbed you harder than we thought."

Pin-Mei looked down at the bandages around her midsection. When she tried to touch them, a sudden pain surged through her and she winced. Then she realized something. "Wait, why is he so exhausted?" she asked looking to the maidservant.

"He hasn't really slept since he came back to life," she said, a small grin on her face. "The whole carriage ride home, he held you. He didn't sleep at all. He'd close his eyes for a while, but then open them at any sudden movement, like he was making sure nothing was coming after you.

"Once we got back here, he immediately took you up here, got his chair, and sat beside your bed holding your hand. He refused to move."

"_Milord, shouldn't you have something to eat?"_

_Nothing._

"_Lord Ren?"_

"_No. I'm staying. Give the servants my share."_

"It was kind of weird seeing him suddenly worrying about us lower class folks. He did that for nearly two days. I didn't agree, but I let him carry on as he wished until about three days ago."

"_Okay, HoroHoro, hold him down!" _

"_What the…? HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU BASTARDS DOING?"_

_Rong finished tying him to the chair. Her accomplice grabbed the young scion's dinner and a utensil and readied himself._

"_Okay, Ren! Open wide!"_

"_HELL NO! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"_

_Rong slapped him. "Stop being such a spoiled brat! If you carry on like this, you're body's going to suffer, which would be a real shame considering all the work and effort you've put into it. Don't you want to look good for her when she wakes up?"_

_He glared at her. "Fine, but you're untying me. I don't need to be fed like an infant."_

"When it came time to change your bandages, he insisted on doing your wrists."

Pin-Mei looked at the ace bandage that covered the slashed skin. She remembered the madness she had been feeling at that moment, the desperation to be with him again, to the point of forgetting the price that would be paid to bring him back. As she lowered her eyes, Rong grabbed one of her wrists.

"He'd take the bandage off, then stare at it for a while." She imitated him. "His eyes would lower, and then…" She kissed the scarred skin. "…he'd kiss it, like it was going to make it better or something." She released her master. "He'd turn away slightly when I changed the bandages from the wound Lady Hua inflicted on you. He seemed as though he'd feel guilty if he looked. It was quite something."

Rong took Ren's body and cradled it in her arms, getting ready to transport him to his bedroom. "He never left your side, Lady Pin-Mei. No matter who tried to disturb him, here he stayed." She sat in his chair and stared straight ahead of her. "Just like this. Doing nothing but staring. Part of me wonders what he was thinking about." She smiled a little. "But it was about you, I know that much. He'd smile or let out a chuckle every once in a while, like he was thinking about the times you'd spent together."

Pin-Mei was still staring at the sleeping boy, looking as though she was about to cry. Rong stood and put her hand on her shoulder.

"He loves you. You're never going to find another guy like him, I can assure you," she said. "He acts tough and protective, but he still shows when he needs you. Take good care of him, Lady Pin-Mei. Something tells me that with the war-torn life he's lived, he needs it."

Pin-Mei nodded as she used her palm to wipe away the tears that had formed in her eyes. She took a deep breath. "I…I just feel like this is all my fault…"

Rong looked at her quizzically. "Why is that?"

"If I…" she sniffled. "If I had been stronger, I wouldn't have been cursed, and I wouldn't have made him kill himself for me…It's all my fault Rong…It's all my fault!"

Rong sighed, then put on her best Ren face and dropped her voice an octave. "Don't say stupid things." She chuckled as the girl cocked her head at her. "That's what he would say, right? It's not your fault. That would be like blaming Lady Hua for marrying someone with no shamanic powers. Love is love. Things are going to happen to you as you walk through life. Good things…bad things…But you two will be there for each other, and it will make the bad things more bearable. I'd say if anything else, this will bring the both of you closer. The both of you now know what it's like to lose the other one, and with something like that hanging over you, you're going to make the best out of everything without even knowing it. So there is some good that will come out of this. He doesn't blame you, I know he doesn't, so don't blame yourself, okay?"

Pin-Mei nodded silently, still looking at her beloved. She stroked his cheek, catching a tear before it could fall on his face. Rong was right; she felt more attracted to him than ever before. The small, simple things like watching him sleep were enough to make her fall in love all over again.

"It seems like you're awake."

The two girls turned to see Anna in the doorway.

"Good, because I want dinner, and one of you has to make it happen. So get to it."

The maidservant frowned. "You don't need us for that. The Tao family has plenty of cooks, I can assure you. Go away. Lady Pin-Mei is having some private time with Lord Ren."

"I suppose having you in here makes it 'private'?" the itako retorted. Rong tossed her head at being shot down.

"It's alright Rong…" the Lady whispered. "T-There's…um…something I want to…um…talk to Anna about anyways…"

* * *

About a day later, when Ren finally opened his eyes, Pin-Mei was right there waiting for him, smiling.

She giggled. "I guess this means _I_ have to go to sleep now because we can't both be up at the same time."

He stared at her. She had probably the oddest sense of humor…next to that blue-haired freak, that is. Still, he smiled.

"No, you can stay awake." He reached out and took her into his arms. "I'm just glad that you're back here with me."

She smiled and nuzzled her head into his shoulder. As she looked over it, she squinted at a calendar on the wall. The days up until February 27th were crossed out.

"KYAAAAAAAAAA!"

"OW! WHAT?"

She pushed away from him as he covered his ears and ran to grab the calendar, then jumped onto the bed and shoved it in his face.

"IS THIS RIGHT?"

He blinked as he removed his hands from his ears and examined it. Then he looked to his clock which aptly told him the date. "Yes, it's the 27th. Why?"

"DO YOU SEE THIS DATE?" She pointed to the 12th.

"What the hell is your…" He stopped. The date was circled in red and "NEW YEAR" was written three times in the small box. His eyes widened. He grabbed the calendar. "What the fuck is this about?"

"New Year's is over! We missed it!" Pin-Mei cried. She paced the room. "How could this happen? The New Year celebration is my favorite holiday! I MISSED IT! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!" She fell to the ground in comic despair.

Ren went and patted her on the head. "It's alright. It's just New Year's. No big deal."

She shot him a glare. "JUST New Year's? ARE YOU CHINESE OR NOT?"

He frowned at her. "If you're going to insult me then leave. I want to put on some clean clothes."

He was telling her to leave? "Ren…"

"I said get out."

"But Ren-!"

"Don't. Make me. Repeat. Myself. Out. Now." He pointed at the door.

With the look of a hurt puppy, she obeyed and left, giving him many backwards glances as she closed the door. Bewildered, she walked briskly down the hall, passing Rong on the way.

"Closer my hide," she said in a choked whisper.

* * *

"Milady, it's dinner time."

"I'm not going."

"Why not?"

"Ren hates me."

"Why do I find this_ extremely_ hard to believe?"

"He told me to leave."

"The castle?"

"His room."

Rong sighed. "You're too sensitive sometimes. He just woke up, he was probably cranky. Come on, let's go."

She threw Pin-Mei over her shoulder and walked to the banquet hall. When she set her down, she was next to Ren at the head of the table. Pin-Mei turned her head so her hair masked her face, not wanting to look at him. He sighed and took her head in his hands and turned it. She looked down the table at the meal plates before her.

"Tangyuan…Zong zi…Man tou…Meat dumplings…" Her eyes widened. "But this is…New Year's food…"

Ren smirked. "You really thought I'd forget that tonight's the last night? For it being your favorite holiday, you sure forget the details."

But his fiancée was busy clapping her hands with delight as she gazed at the dishes before her. He smiled.

"Which reminds me, I forgot something. I'll be right back." He got up and left. She stared after him quizzically, then looked back to see Manta rolling a large television screen to the center of the room.

"What's that for?" she asked.

Manta grinned. "It's New Year's, so you know what that means…"

"SHAMAN FIGHT VIDEO!" the Japanese boys cried.

Pin-Mei blinked and cocked her head. "What's a video?"

The shorty cleared his throat. "Actually, it isn't a video anymore. With the new technology in Japan, I've got it all on DVD!" He held up the circular disc.

Silence.

"So can you throw that?"

"NO! YOU CAN'T!" He slipped the DVD in the player and turned it on.

She leaned over to Yoh. "What is this?"

"It's a video of what happened three years ago during the Shaman Fights," he explained. "There are some parts I think you'll really like…"

She made a small sound of confusion, but then he nudged her.

"Look."

Pin-Mei turned to the screen, and her eyes widened.

A thirteen year-old Ren was fighting Yoh in the final preliminaries of the Shaman Fight, dressed as she had seen him in her dream. The group chuckled as she skittered to be as close to the screen as possible, having to look straight up to see anything. Rong ran up and pulled her a few feet backwards so she could watch the fight without hurting her eyes or neck. She didn't seem to notice as she was mesmerized by the moving picture in front of her.

Ren finally returned. "Okay, since you whined, I went out and got you something…"

No one was at the table. He looked up and saw the television – and himself. He dropped the bag he had, then remembered its contents and swiftly grabbed it before it hit the floor, gently setting it down. Finally, he turned his attention to the horrid technology before him.

"What the hell is this?" he yelled.

Everyone sans Pin-Mei turned to look at him. She was still transfixed on the image on the screen.

"Oh hey, Ren!" Yoh called raising his hand. "We're just watching the Shaman Fight video. It's our tradition to watch it on New Year's, remember?"

Ren clenched his fist. This was true. However, now he had someone there that he was a little self-conscious about letting see his past behavior.

"Don't taint her mind with your blasted Japanese technology! Turn it off – **NOW!"**

Yoh scratched his head. "Sure but…" He looked behind him. "She really seems to be enjoying it."

Ren looked past them to stare at her back. She leaned toward the television, her expression similar to that of a little boy watching Batman cartoons. She was silently cheering on her hero, ever confident that he would prevail.

Yoh grinned at him. "Do you really want to take that away from her?"

After more staring, Ren grumbled and went to sit behind her. He watched her slight movements until she made a small squeal.

The two fighters had dealt one last blow to the other and were now standing on opposite sides of the battlefield. Pin-Mei watched eagerly to see who the victor was. As the last of Ren's furyoku faded away, she gasped.

"EHHHH? NO WAY!"

Yoh laughed. "She really seems dismayed about Ren losing."

She listened as Ren began his speech about his inability to cut the wind, her shoulders drooping. "No way…" The serious words seemed to flow over her head as she seemingly paid them no mind.

The rest of the group, however, didn't miss a beat in pointing out the cheesiness of his actions.

"No one can cut the wind," Rong said in her Ren voice.

"I feel lighter," Manta said.

"Asakura Yoh, it's painful to say, but you are the winner," Amidamaru mocked.

As they laughed, Ren could feel himself and his pride shrinking. It had sounded so good in his head…

An uneasy sound came from him, and Pin-Mei finally turned her head. She saw the dejected look on his face and the laughing boys behind him, then put the two of them together.

"Siu meh ah da-boon-jao? Sow deh lar!" she yelled turning around for a brief moment.

The laughing stopped. The Japanese boys just stared at her, as did Rong and Ren.

"Yoh, what did she say?" HoroHoro whispered.

"I don't know…That was Cantonese. Ren only taught me Mandarin."

Rong stared at the couple. "Lady Pin-Mei…"

Pin-Mei suddenly seemed to realize what she had said and looked at the ground. Slowly, she turned back around. "S-Sorry…"

Ren still couldn't believe what she had said. Usually he wouldn't have welcomed an outburst like that in his defense, but with her…it was almost cute, if that word was even in his vocabulary. He half-smiled and went to sit beside her. Then he discreetly took her hand and held it.

"Thanks," he whispered in her ear. "But no more swearing, alright?"

Her face went completely red and she nodded sheepishly. He kissed her forehead and they continued watching the video.

"Rong," the Ainu whispered. "What did she say?"

Rong ignored him and smiled softly as she watched Ren put his arm around his defender.

"_What are you laughing at, you stupid pigs? Shut the fuck up!"_


	53. More Than Words

My friend asked why I call my pairing "RenMei" and not "PinRen". Well, number one, I don't think PinRen sounds as good as "RenMei" which, as I've said, means "alliance" in Japanese. Number two, some believe that the name that comes first indicates who is more dominate in a relationship. The day Ren submits to Pin-Mei is the day Rong submits to HoroHoro.

The Adult Fanfiction version of this chapter has been posted also (and is finally up to date with past chapters).

**Notes: FLUFF ALERT - This chapter has some lime in it. Nothing horribly explicit, but just as a warning (I'm trying so hard to keep this within the rating). I also make reference to the Adult Fanfiction version of chapter 33 (the dream Pin-Mei has of the rape).**

**Spoilers for the end of the anime.**

**I'm going to pose a rather interesting/controversial theory/idea in this chapter, possibly two, about the "hero" of the story and Ren's past. This is all coming from a Ren fangirl. Brace yourselves.**

**China has no drinking age. It only recently (2006) enacted a law for an age to buy alcohol, (18) but nothing for drinking has been mentioned. (Even the age law is being challenged by seniors who send their grandchildren out to buy alcohol when they are unable to leave the house, so it is not enforced.)**

**I hope you all "get" the sound effect that HoroHoro makes in this chapter, because I don't really know how to explain it without giving it away. O.o Put it this way, if you don't figure it out, look it up on Urban Dictionary (dot) com and look at the second entry. **

**I think it should also be noted that from now on Pin-Mei's hair is down; HoroHoro's hair is also, since Rong still has his headband.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Three: More Than Words**

* * *

They continued watching the video, and nothing more was said in jest about Ren. They had obviously learned their lesson.

A few hours passed, and they soon came to the near end of the fights. Team the Ren, along with Ryu and Faust were battling the last of Hao's minions. Pin-Mei was leaning closer and closer to the screen, obviously on the edge of her seat. As Ren went to pull her back, he looked at himself and remembered what was coming up next.

"Give me the remote, runt."

"Why?"

"We're skipping over this part."

"Why?"

"BECAUSE I—"

He was stopped by a small shriek. Slowly he turned around to see Pin-Mei covering her mouth, tears in her eyes. The video showed Ren laying deathly still on the ground in a pool of his blood.

"That's why, you idiot."

He grabbed the remote and began to fast-forward it, but she stopped him.

"It's okay, I'm fine, I was just surprised that's all."

He looked at her, but continued to speed up the scene. "It's just them fighting anyway. Boring."

"What did you say?" HoroHoro cried.

"You heard me. You did absolutely nothing this whole fight. That's the reason I ended up in that embarrassing situation."

"STOP!"

Pin-Mei grabbed the remote and pressed play as Lyzerg came on the screen. She stared at it.

"He's so adorable," she sighed. She felt Ren glaring at her. "Adorable isn't the same as cute or handsome," she said quickly. She smiled. "He's like 'Oh I want to add him to my doll collection' cute."

His eyes narrowed at her. "And what am I?"

She blushed. "You're…um…I…I want…to…um…"

Rong sensed her uneasiness. "Yo! Down in front! Be quiet!" Pin-Mei looked back at her in thanks and she nodded.

As Yoh dealt the final blow to Hao, and he split and disappeared, the DVD was shut off.

"And that's how Yoh saved the world from certain doom," Manta said, eyeing Ren maliciously. Ren could only glare back at him. He hadn't killed Hao, his hated rival had. He knew it made him look weak in the eyes of the girl sitting next to him. The whole thing made him sick.

"No…No, that's wrong…"

Everyone looked the small girl still sitting in front of the television set. She was shaking her head slowly.

"It's wrong…"

Looking slightly pained, Ren knew what he had to say. "You saw it; Yoh killed Hao, not me. He saved humanity…not me…"

"I said it's wrong!" She stood up and planted her feet firmly on the ground. "If it wasn't for Ren, we'd all be dead!"

They stared at her wide-eyed. Ren tried to read her harsh expression as she glared at her fiancée's rival.

"Yoh, you needed to win against Ren in order to advance to the next phase of the Shaman Fight, correct?"

Yoh seemed slightly surprised. "Well yeah…If I didn't win, I would've been out."

"Yes, but you tied, and both of you advanced. But consider this: what if you hadn't won? Would you have ever met Hao, do you think? The chances of you going to the Patch Village would have been pretty slim if you weren't a contestant, right?"

"I guess…"

Her arm snapped up and she pointed at the headphones boy threateningly.

"Face it, Yoh. Ren could have easily crushed you if neither of you spoke. But you chose to be dirty and played with his emotions so you could make him get angry. It distracted him, and his fighting became sloppy. If you hadn't done that, he would have snapped you in half. You can't even compare to him. If he had done that, you would have lost and never been able to fight Hao. You never would have beaten him!"

HoroHoro scratched his head. "I don't get it."

Pin-Mei looked annoyed. "If Ren had beaten Yoh, not tied him, BEAT HIM, then Yoh would not have moved on to face Hao, and Hao may have taken over by now. Ren and his anger are the reason the world was saved!"

Ren ran over to her and covered her mouth and put her arm down. "Did you guys give her the New Year's wine or something? She's not usually like this." He knew they hadn't. He was only trying to cover for her, worrying that someone, namely Anna, would challenge her and a war of words would begin.

Instead, stifled laughter was heard, then it was unrestrained. He looked up to see Rong and HoroHoro rolling on the floor, tears of laughter in their eyes.

"Oh God!" Rong cried. "She's been infected! The pride has taken over! She's becoming a Tao right before our eyes! HoHo what are we going to do?"

"How are we going to survive if she becomes a pompous, pig-headed jerk like Ren? Rong we've got to save her before it's too late!" her partner howled.

But they both remained on the floor, rolling around until their ribs ached. Yoh started laughing also, and Manta joined in.

Ren loosened his grip on her and stared at them, then at her. Pink had christened her cheeks once again. This was the second time tonight that she had defended him, going up against the rest of the group. Was this the real Pin-Mei? The one that had been inside all along, that was now able to be free with Suo's chains dissolved?

"Come on, while these idiots are busy." He pulled her over to the table, took a small box from the bag, and shoved it at her. She blinked at stared down at it. It pink with gold ribbons.

"Thank you for the box. It's really pretty."

"What do you take me for? I wouldn't just give you a box," he grumbled. "Open the damn thing."

She did and took out a large, claw-like hair clip with a pin through its center. A string of pearls dripped from the pin and the clip itself was adorned with rubies. Small wings in the form of crystals graced the sides of it, making it look as though the clip would fly away if she did not hold onto it tightly enough. Her eyes sparkled with the reflections of the jewels.

"It's beautiful…"

Quickly, she twisted her hair and put it in the clasp. The pin gave her difficulty, and after watching her struggle with a smirk on his face, Ren slipped it into place for her.

"Heh. Of course you can't even put the pin in. The rest will fall apart without it."

Rong came up behind her and inspected the gift. "It looks fine, Milady." She smiled at Ren. "And don't mind him. You should know by now that he's doing that because he's happy to see you."

The recipient smiled. "Thank you, Ren."

"Yeah." He turned away from her before an inevitable streak of red crossed his cheeks. Rong smirked.

"Anyway, it looks like the servants brought in desert while we were watching the TV. Let's eat before it goes bad."

Pin-Mei turned plopped down in front of a plate of Nian Gao and took one as everyone else sat around the table; Rong at her right, Ren at her left. She took a bite, and her eyes lit up.

"Kyaaa! It's so good! It's so sweet! It's so…so…" She stopped. Her bangs were covering her eyes.

The people on either side of her gave her differing glances. Rong seemed to almost be expecting this, while Ren seemed utterly confused.

A few airy gasps came from Pin-Mei's throat as the cake slipped from her hands and onto the floor. Ren looked alarmed and touched her shoulder.

"Are you choking?"

She hurriedly shook her head as she brought up her right index finger and bit down on its curve. He watched as a flood of tears began cascading down her cheeks. She let out a few high-pitched whimpers before Rong grabbed her and held Pin-Mei against her chest. The girl howled as Rong desperately tried to stifle her cries.

"Is she having a seizure?"

The caretaker glared at him. "NO SHE'S-," She stopped, collected herself, and looked at the crying girl in her arms. "No, she's not." She looked at Ren. "The New Year's Festival was her favorite holiday, but now I fear it will only cause her pain from here on."

Ren narrowed his eyes quizzically. "Why?"

"Last year, someone was there who shouldn't have been. This year, someone who is supposed to be here isn't."

"What?"

"Ren, think about Pin-Mei. Who's missing?"

He frowned slightly as he looked around the table.

_Who's supposed to be here? Someone came last year when no one was expecting them…Now Pin-Mei is expecting them, and they aren't here…Who?...Wait…_

"Zhang…" he whispered.

Rong nodded. "Last year was the year that Lord Zhang left his room during the New Year's celebration and began treating Pin-Mei more like a daughter than he ever had. This year, against his will, he is unable to be here." She looked at the sobbing Pin-Mei. "She's in pain. Even if Lord Zhang never treated her like a daughter a year before this, she still misses him…She misses that warmth she received from him. The warmth you receive from a parent and the warmth you receive from a lover are different. Sometimes, love fades, but a parent's love is unconditional." She locked eyes with Ren again. "But I feel that yours is also. Show me."

Her arms loosened around the girl and Ren could only stare for a few moments. This wasn't the same as when he had comforted her in her room. This kind of hurt was permanent. A hurt that would always be with her. He didn't know if going about it the same way would work.

_Show me._

It was a challenge. When he looked at it that way, there was no chance that he'd back down.

He grabbed her and held her against his chest, allowing her to cry into his shoulder. He put his right hand on the back of her head and his other around her waist. Blood dripped from her finger, and he took it from her and replaced it with his mouth.

He suddenly realized that everyone was watching, so he then picked her up and carried her out of the room. Rong and HoroHoro stared after them.

"Bow chicka WOW WOW!"

Rong slapped him.

"Shut up, HoroHoro. He knows not to do that. Unlike you, he has the ability to be a gentleman when he wants to."

The boy fake-cried into his arm. "You don't love me at all do you?"

She sighed, stood up, and then left the room.

"WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?"

"Stop making things up," she mumbled to herself.

* * *

Ren sat on a stone bench outside with a still sobbing Pin-Mei in his lap. He resumed the position that he had held at the table and allowed her tears to fall on his shoulder. For a moment, he just looked over her shoulder at the ground, trying to collect his thoughts and remember how to comfort her.

"I'm sorry that I didn't think of it," he said softly. "Suo told me what New Year's meant to you, but I forgot. I'm sorry. That's all I can do right now - apologize. I can't bring him back. I wish I could, for your sake, but I can't. But I think if you can be happy about anything right now, it should be because Zhang and Hua can be together now. We were only apart for a month. They were for over fourteen years. Once they find each other in the afterlife, they'll be together forever, and I promise you, they'll be happy.

"Zhang wouldn't want you to be sad right now, and I don't want you to be either. I would have been nicer if I knew you were having a tough time."

He had hardly noticed her decrease in volume. He looked down to see she had again taken to biting her finger, her chest still heaving occasionally. Sighing, he removed it and replaced it with his own.

"Sooner or later, you would have bitten through it," he said.

She turned away from the digit. "I don't want to bite you."

"What? Am I not good enough?"

"No…I just don't want to hurt you…"

"HA! As if you could," he said giving her a cocky smile. He bent his finger and stuck it in her mouth. She swatted him away.

"Bleh! You're choking me! You're trying to kill me!"

"No, if I was going to kill you, I'd just poison you remember? So much easier. Plus, I don't have to actually watch you die. I just slip it into your food and down you go." He snickered as she trembled. "Calm down, you know I wouldn't do that."

She nodded. Suddenly, a box flew and hit her in the head. After a whimper, she picked it up and looked behind her to see Rong giving her a salute. Ren blinked as she handed the box to him.

"Um…This was…is…your birthday present. I forgot it when we came the first time because Rong hid it, but here."

"Thanks." He untied the ribbon and opened the simple white box. Removing the tissue paper, he lifted up a black and gold oriental shirt with a dragon seemingly wrapping itself around the back. It was made out of fine silk, nothing cheap about it. He smiled at her. "Thanks. I like it."

Pin-Mei beamed. "Hehe."

Before she knew it, he had taken off his shirt and was now putting his new one on. When he was done, he lifted his hands slightly, signaling for her to come to him. As she began to make her way over, a smaller box hit the back of her head and she grabbed it as it bounced into the air. She opened it, looked inside, then slammed it shut, a blush streaking across her face, and put it in her shirt.

He narrowed his eyes. "What's that?"

"N-Nothing…" She looked at the ground. "I…I'm going to go to bed."

He went to walk her inside. "I'll see you in there, then. I'm going to stay up a little longer and then-,"

"No, Ren. I'm not going to be in your bed when you get there. Not tonight…I want to…be alone right now." Her eyes watered as she looked away from him.

He stared at her. It was their first night together in a month and she wasn't going to even sleep in the same bed with him? Had his teasing gone too far? Had it hurt her that he hadn't noticed her pain? All the same, he nodded slowly, knowing that he could do nothing to change her mind without being selfish. "Okay…"

He leaned in to kiss her, but she went into the house and shut the door. With wide and slightly hurt eyes, he watched her until she disappeared. A few minutes later, he followed, but went into the weight room instead. As he stood under the shower head, water dripping from his face as he turned the knob off, he tried to figure out just what had gone wrong.

_What's going on? Something's not right…_

"Trouble in Paradise, huh?"

He tensed.

"Here, catch."

A towel flew over the top of the shower wall and he caught it. After wrapping it around himself, he opened the shower door to see Rong leaning against the wall.

"What do you want?" he said in an annoyed voice.

She walked over to him. "For the next few minutes, you get no titles to your name. We're going to talk as equals."

He walked past her. "I have no equals."

"What about Her? Why doesn't She have to call you Lord Ren?"

He stopped, his fist clenched. "Because I love her, and you don't make loved ones call you by such titles."

"Well, then. I'm going to be a step below that." She handed him his clothes. "Now get dressed."

He grumbled and walked back into the stall. "Put your head against the back wall. Not even Pin-Mei sees me like this, so you sure as hell won't."

"Yes, yes."

When he emerged, she led him out of the room and outside to the beach. They stood on the sand silently for a few minutes before Rong spoke.

"Have you ever seen a ballet?"

He gave her a look that told her she was crazy. "What? No, of course not. I don't have time for such trash."

She chuckled. "When Pin-Mei was really young, there was a small ballet performance of _Swan Lake_ that her school went to. I was told to accompany her in case there were problems with other students. We had just come back from your house, so she was caught in a slight depression. I was expecting her to fall asleep if I was lucky. I never thought something like that would interest her." She turned to him. "Do you know the story of _Swan Lake_?"

He was slightly irritated. What did this have to do with the current situation? "No, I don't know the goddamn story."

She ignored him. "It's about a prince, Siegfried, who must choose a woman to marry by his birthday banquet. Upset that he can't marry for love instead, he runs off into the woods to go hunting. He is about to shoot down a swan, but notices that it moves more like a woman instead of a bird. The swan was a princess named Odette who had been placed under the curse of a warlock after she was kidnapped years ago. A woman by night, a swan by day.

"They fall in love, and he decides that she will be the one he marries. The curse on her would break upon hearing a vow of everlasting love, so everything seemed fine. She could be normal, and they would live happily ever after.

"But the warlock prevented Odette from attending the party, sending his daughter Odile in her place, who looked almost identical to her. Siegfried accidentally made his vow to Odile, only realizing his fault when Odette appears." She paused.

Ren looked at her expectantly. "The end?"

Rong smirked. She had gotten him interested in a ballet! Such a wonderful story to tell afterwards…

"Luckily, the version the Chinese adopted has a happy ending, but it is not the same in all countries. Here, the love of Siegfried and Odette defeats the warlock. Odette's human form is restored, and they live happily ever after. In every other version, Odette is either locked in her swan body or dies. I'm just glad that they showed and allowed the children a happy ending. It's cruel to show a four year-old that true love doesn't always triumph."

"Why are you telling me this again?"

She nodded to herself. "In the ballet, there is a special dance for two people, a pas de deux. They move with each other in perfect harmony, as if they share one mind, one heart, one body. Siegfried and Odette danced a pas de deux in the performance that Pin-Mei and I saw. Pin-Mei couldn't take their eyes off of them. She was absolutely mesmerized. At one point, she looked back at me and said…"

"_Hey Rong, do people move like that when they really like each other?"_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_Before, they were dancing alone, but now they're dancing together, and they look really happy. Is that because they're in love?"_

"_I guess you could say that…"_

"_I want a prince."_

"_What?"_

"_Ne, ne, Rong, do you think Ren's a prince?"_

"_No. He's not royalty, even if he thinks he is."_

"_Don't you just have to be rich and live in a big house?"_

"_No…There's more to it than that…_ _You have to be kind, brave, noble, selfless..."_

"_But I bet Ren can be all of that. He can be the prince and I'll be the swan, and we can dance together! It'll be so much fun!"_

"It was all she could talk about for weeks. 'Ne, Rong can we go see Ren again? I wanna dance with him!' 'Ne, Rong, will you practice dancing with me?' 'Ne, Rong, how do you become a swan?' On and on…I have to admit, I was about ready to scream. But the thing is, as naïve as she was, she understood what a pas de deux such as that meant. Two people in love, moving together in perfect harmony, expressing that love without words."

Ren stared across the water, the fleeting image of Pin-Mei wearing a feathered tutu in his mind. Rong stood in front of him.

"If you couldn't simply say 'I love you' to Pin-Mei, how would you let her know how strong your feelings are?" When he said nothing, she turned and started towards the house. "Let's head back. We can finish this inside."

Strangely obedient, he followed. Perhaps because he was so deep in thought. As they neared the hallway leading to his room, Rong stopped, her back still turned to him.

"I know something you've been keeping from Pin-Mei."

He stopped and looked up at her. "What did you say?"

She looked at him from over her shoulder.

"You're not a virgin, are you?"

He involuntarily tensed. "What makes you think that?"

She swiveled and walked up to him, putting her face mere inches from his and looking him in the eye.

"It's in your eyes. Almost all the innocence is gone from them." She took a few steps back. "Your eyes and Pin-Mei's eyes are different. Hers sparkle because of the innocence she possesses. Since you have barely any left, your eyes are dull in color, yet sharp enough to pierce hearts."

"What makes you think you can read me?"

"I can read almost anyone. You took longer than most, but it was possible. I was raised to protect Pin-Mei, and that meant reading people. If there are two men about to attack, I have to figure out which one will attack first, or how they will swing or throw their weapon just by looking at them." Her eyes narrowed. "I'm right aren't I? Three years ago, you were like Zhang."

He clenched his fist. "Shut up."

"You were in pain because of what your father did to you-,"

"Shut up!"

"And that was your only way out-,"

"SHUT UP!"

"So even when you told Pin-Mei how important it was to wait, you were only being a hypocrite. The truth is that you're afraid that if she finds out, she'll think less of you or stop loving you altogether-,"

"I SAID TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

He grabbed her by the throat and threw her against the wall. As she hit it, she slumped down slightly, taking in the pain on her back.

"What the hell is going on?"

The two of them looked behind Ren to see HoroHoro standing there with a worried look on his face. His eyes darted to Rong, then to Ren, then back to Rong. He squinted and saw the beginnings of finger-shaped bruises on her neck, causing him to run over to her, his eyes slightly panicked.

"What happened?" He pulled her from the wall and touched her shoulders. "Wait…" He turned to glare at Ren. "Did you touch her?" He moved to go after him, but Rong pulled on his wrist.

"It's okay, Horo. I deserved it."

"Damn right you did."

"HEY!" He tried to move towards him again, but he was still held back. "Let go, Rong. He has to learn that you don't put your hands on girls like that."

"I'm fine. Really. You just go."

"But what if he-,"

"He won't, I promise."

"Still, I don't-,"

"Just. Go."

"Fine…But first I'm going to…" He began to run at his friend, fist in the air.

"HOROKEU!" Rong cried grabbing him by the wrist to pull him back. With one tug, she spun him around and raised her hand near his face. He flinched, as if expecting a slap, but instead she placed it on his cheek. "I'm going to be fine, so go, okay? He and I still have some things we need to talk about. I'll be there soon, promise."

He looked at the floor. "Fine." He spun to glare at Ren. "But he has to apologize first."

Ren smirked at him. "I have no reason to. She was out of line, and I was simply putting her back in her place."

The Ainu returned the gesture. "Then I'll be sure to treat Pin-Mei the same way."

Yellow eyes shot open with burning rage. "Don't you even dare!"

He laughed. "If the roles were reversed, you'd be beating me up right now. Even if she said something that offended an entire country you wouldn't want anyone touching her." His eyes were hard again. "Now you know how I feel."

Ren stared at the ground for a moment, placing Pin-Mei in Rong's place. He looked away from her. "…Sorry…"

"Hmph." HoroHoro turned back to the woman behind him. "Don't take too long, okay?" He walked away from her, allowing his hand to brush against hers, but nothing more. As he passed his friend, he stopped for a moment beside him. "Don't touch her again." Then continued on to his room. After he was out of sight, Rong and Ren stared at each other.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I went too far."

He only nodded. A couple beats went by before he gestured his head to the dark space behind him where the footsteps had faded. "What was that?"

She looked past him in the direction the boy had left. "Even I need to be taken care of sometimes…" Her gaze returned to her lord. "But that's not the point."

"So hurry up and get to it."

"Alright, fine. I will." She sighed and crossed her arms. "How much do you think Pin-Mei has been affected by all of this?"

He thought for a moment. He hadn't considered it before. "Why?"

"In the long run, it may make both your lives a little harder."

"How so?"

She started walking towards him. "The last time you two were together, you were cursed and tried to rape her. She told you she forgave you, but don't you think that image of you being boorish enough to do something like that stays in her mind?"

He shifted. "Well…"

"And she told me that Suo made her have a nightmare where you followed through with the act. Four times. It was so real to her that she could almost feel the pain. Don't you think something like that is going to have an effect on her? On the both of you?"

He shrugged. "She's just not going to want it for a while. So what?"

She smirked. "Noble, but in this case, not quite enough."

Ren narrowed his eyes at her. "What are you talking about?"

"Picture this: It's your wedding night. After a wonderful, heartfelt ceremony, the two of you are getting ready for what should be a very special night. But when you go to remove her robes, she screams and starts crying. What would you do?"

He was silent as he looked down, his eyes invisible to her. "I wouldn't go on. Of course not. What do you take me for? I'd wait until she was ready."

"What if that's never?"

He stared at her. "What?"

"What if that never happens? What if she never recovers and you can never be that intimate with her?"

He was quiet again as he looked away from her.

"You wouldn't be able to have children with her. And without an heir, your family would end."

To her surprise, Ren started laughing.

"I don't know where she got the idea that I care one bit about restoring my family, but I don't. I was raised to have that be the only thing I think about, my only goal, but I couldn't care less about it. I only want children because she does. It doesn't matter to me. None of this sex shit does."

Rong had been staring at him, her eyes wide in astonishment. Then she smiled. "Thanks. That's all I needed to know." She walked past him, patting his shoulder. "Good night, Lord Ren." When she was a few steps behind him, she stopped.

"You know, I've heard that it feels better when you love the person."

"What?"

"Nothing. Good night." And after a small chuckle she added, "Sleep well."

She walked down the hall in the direction her advocate had and stopped in front of his door, then rapped on it thrice.

"I told you that you don't have to knock."

She opened it slowly, as if to make sure he was decent. "Force of habit."

HoroHoro was sitting on his bed, but got up as she closed the door behind her and leaned on it, staring at the ground.

"You okay?"

She nodded slightly, but he saw few tears fall from her eyes. He walked over to her and allowed her to lean against him. She buried her face in his chest and her hands finally grasped the back of his shirt.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm happy for them, I really am. But at the same time, to have to be in that room, the one so close to theirs tonight…I can't do it…Even if I shouldn't be able to, I don't want to listen…"

_Rong…_

She looked up at him, her cranberry eyes filled with tears. "This is a dream come true for her. To Pin-Mei, Ren falling in love with her was like the football captain falling in love with the class outcast. She thought it would never happen. I shouldn't still be this selfish. Not about her…" She clutched him again. "Help me, Horokeu…I don't want to go back…"

He grabbed her shoulders and kissed her deeply. Their foreheads touched as he released her. He wiped away her tears and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight and he put his mouth to her ear.

"Then just stay here."

Her eyes widened, then shrunk again as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Okay…"

* * *

As Rong's footsteps faded, Ren took a deep breath and rather reluctantly walked down the hall. He wasn't looking forward to yet another night of sleeping by himself, especially when Pin-Mei was finally back home.

"_If you couldn't simply say 'I love you' to Pin-Mei, how would you let her know how strong your feelings are?"_

_I don't know…Why wouldn't I be able to say it in the first place?_

He opened the door to the dark and dreary room. As he closed the door, he reached for the light switch on the wall to his left. But before he could flip it on, a hand quickly covered his and brought it down, preventing any light from shining in the room. The only lamp was that of the moon, which shone through the large twin windows on the far wall.

"Keep the lights off," a whisper came to his ear. "We don't need them."

His eyes widened. "Pin-Mei? I…I thought you wanted to sleep in your room tonight."

There was a giggle. "I never said that. I said I wouldn't be in your bed when you came in, and I'm not. I'm standing here in front of you."

She giggled again and stroked his cheek as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. Before he could react, she walked over to the windows and basked in the moonlight. His eyes widened as he saw the cream silk nightgown she was wearing under a sheer robe. She turned to him, smiled, and beckoned him over.

"Come here, Ren."

After staring at her for a few moments, he made his way over to her. She pulled him down and held him in a deep kiss. When she let go of him and he regained his posture, she took his right hand in both of hers and caressed it. This was so unlike her to be this forward…what was going on?

"Pin-Mei…why are you dressed like that?"

She placed her index finger on his lips. "Shh…It's my turn to talk right now." She let go of him and turned away.

"Since we came back here, I bet we've both been thinking that this means that things are back to normal, they're the way they should be, right?"

"I guess…"

She looked over her shoulder at him. "But there's something wrong…Something's missing…Something…You did it last time…Now, it's my turn."

Ren watched as she faced him and reached into her nightgown, pulling out the small box from before. She knelt down in front of him and opened it.

Inside was a gold engagement band.

All he could do was stare at it. This was so unexpected, especially from her. She smiled at him.

"You know I love you. I did even before last month. I loved you when you insulted my cooking, when you dunked me underwater, when you stuffed snow down my back, and when…you weren't yourself…

"I could barely breathe after I left here. I can't even remember breathing at all when you weren't. You're like air to me - I can't live without you.

"Our engagement was broken, but that means nothing to me. I still love you and I don't care if they understand or not. I need to be with you. Tonight just made it more clear to me that you're all I have, and I want you to have all of me. I want to be yours until the world is gone. I want to sleep next to you and wake up next to you." Tears dripped off her cheeks. "I want to have your children. I want to die at the exact second that you do so I don't have to be without you - ever.

"From the moment I met you, you've been changing my life. For the better. You've made me so happy…and I want to do the same for you…because I love seeing you smile. I feel like it gives me a purpose.

"So, Ren, please, will you-,"

He knelt down in front of her and captured her in a passionate kiss, sending the box to the floor. As he ended it, he looked deep into her eyes, not daring to blink.

"Yes."

When she just kept staring at him, he smirked and put the ring on himself, tossing the box behind him. She was as still as stone as he kissed her again.

"It's nice," he said. "You know I like gold more than silver."

"I knew you'd only take the best."

He chuckled at her. As he looked up from his hand, her eyes stood out to him. They had that different stare that he had seen somewhere before, but couldn't remember when. They were glossy, almost dream-filled. She crawled the two feet over to him and laid against his chest.

It was unusual for her. She knew that he didn't like being touched, so she usually waited until he gave her some sort of signal that it was okay. There was a muffled sound and he looked down at her.

"What?"

Pin-Mei looked up at him with those listless eyes again. "Ren…Will you…sleep with me tonight?"

He studied her, then smiled. "Yeah, it's getting late anyway." He stood, bringing her up with him, and walked over to his dresser to take off his shirt. She just stood there looking at the floor, not moving. As he hung his new shirt up, he made his way over to her and touched her robe. "When did you get this? I don't remember Rong packing it."

She didn't look at him. "She bought it while you were sleeping."

"Oh, I see. Well, we're going to bed, so you don't need it right now."

When she didn't move, he slipped the sheer material off her shoulders and let it fall to the floor, and then pulled the pin from the barrette he had given her, catching it as it fell from her hair. Still, she didn't respond. Ren finally picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. He carried her to the bed and set her down. Slightly annoyed, he snapped his fingers in front of her face a couple times. She seemed to jolt back into reality and looked up at the galled expression on his face. Ashamed, she looked at the mattress.

"Sorry…I was just lost in thought…that's all…"

He instantly softened as he remembered Zhang and wrapped his arms around her. "It's fine, space out all you want. You have my permission." He was slightly surprised when she gently pushed him away.

"I'm fine. Let's just go to bed."

Not knowing what else he could do, he went to the other side of the bed and got in, laying on his back. As they got under the covers, she scooted over and put her head on his chest.

"You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah…"

"I'm going to be pissed if you're lying."

"I'm not…" Her left hand crept onto his chest.

He eyed her. "Fine." He wrapped his arm around her. "Good night."

"Good night…"

As he closed his eyes, Pin-Mei took her finger and began tracing the outline of his pecs, eventually trailing down to his abs. He stirred and breathed deeply, but said nothing, allowing her to continue. She inhaled sharply and closed her eyes. Ren's tongari stood on end as the hand dipped lower. He grabbed her wrist.

"What the hell are you doing?" he cried.

Her gaze didn't waver as pink covered her cheeks. "I'm doing what I want to, now that I have the chance. You can't tell me that you don't want this."

A blush streaked across his face. "Pin-Mei…" She was looking at him earnestly. They held each other's gaze as he seemed to be deep in thought, conflicted with himself. "You don't have to-,"

"I know. But I want to."

"But what about…that dream?"

"That man wasn't you. It was someone Suo sent to hurt me. I know that you would never do that to me…"

He shook his head and looked away from her. "No…I can't…"

"Ren." Pin-Mei put her hand on his cheek and turned his face back to her. She took his right hand and placed it on her chest. She could hear his acute intake of breath as his hand fought against the rest of him. "I love you, and I want to show you that. I thought about it, like you said to. It has to be with you, Ren, or not at all."

He stared at her, then leaned in to kiss her passionately. His mouth trailed up to her ear.

"Are you sure?" he whispered.

"More than I've ever been in my life," she whispered back.

He kissed her again as he rolled on top of her, his mouth still near her ear.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

They hugged for a really long time.


	54. A Knight in Disguise

Phew! I'm glad last chapter went over smoothly. I was a little worried people would be like "Ew! Smex! Yucky!" But luckily you guys are mature enough to notice that I didn't just throw it in there because I felt like it. O.o

I based a little bit of this chapter on an experience I had with a teacher from China in fourth grade. She smacked me on the head because she thought I was making a mess with the calligraphy ink. –cries-

And I just wanna say…I really love Ren in this chapter.

**Notes: Some sexual talk/humor.**

**Some flashbacks to the night before are taken from the AFF version of this chapter and the one before it.**

**It might also be worth noting that Pin-Mei is the youngest in her class because of cutoff dates for entering grades.**

"**Gōng xì" means "congratulations".**

"**Biăo zi" means "prostitute/whore".**

**This may feel like Pin-Mei is being victimized, but you must also remember that a similar situation, while it would have had a different topic, could have happened to Ren as well.**

**It's Japanese superstition that if you sneeze, someone's talking about you.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Four: A Knight in Disguise**

* * *

Ren opened his eyes and looked down at himself. Pin-Mei was sleeping with her head on his chest, a content smile on her face. He brushed her hair from her face and kissed her forehead, then gently began rubbing her left shoulder with his arm around her.

Scenes from the night before were playing in his mind. It was almost too unreal. He had never thought it would come so soon. Even as he moved above her, a slight twinge of guilt had swept through him. What if she regretted this tomorrow? What if it was too soon?

But last night, she had smiled.

_He looked down at her to see tears falling down the sides of her face, her eyes closed. He panicked slightly._

"_Are you okay? I'll stop if you-"_

_She shook her head and smiled brightly. "No…No, it's not that at all…I'm just…so happy."_

She stirred next to him, then moaned quietly and opened her eyes. He stroked her hair and she looked up at him. He smiled at her slightly.

"'Morning."

She was about to reply when she looked down and saw how the blankets were barely covering his body. It reminded her of what had happened only hours before; his body moving over her, sweat falling from his brow, dripping down his chest and back, and…what had happened when she had driven him so far as to awaken his chauvinistic, controlling side.

Her face burned red as she remembered how he had completely dominated and had his way with her. It only became hotter as she looked up at his smiling face, the one that had given her a spine-tingling, monopolizing glare only a few hours before. She dove under the covers on the opposite side of the bed. He stared at the large, shaking lump that seemed to be trying to hide from him.

"It's not like I don't know you're under there," he said sighing. He crawled over to her and was about to rip the sheets off her when the lump made an embarrassed sound. "What?"

"C-Can you...um…p-put some p-pants on please?"

Some would have taken this as an insult, like she didn't want to look at him, but he just gave her a cocky smile. She was back to being the submissive, meek, bashful girl she had always been. As he humored her, whispering could be heard from under the covers.

"Perfectly normal, nothing wrong with it, naked boys are a part of life…You're going to be living with it for the rest of your life so get used to it…Nothing to be embarrassed about…"

"Are you chanting under there?"

Pin-Mei looked up to see that Ren had lifted the covers up and was staring down at her. She frantically curled up into a ball, trying to cover herself up as best as she could. A jacket was draped over her and she looked up. A large shirt of Ren's was now covering her, seeing as how her nightgown was out of commission.

The night before, when it was being removed, Ren failed to see that ribbons tied it closed in the back. Even after Pin-Mei had shown them to him, his patience with the wretched material was already rail thin. He had reached around, grabbed all the ribbons, and, with one powerful tug, ripped them out, taking most of the back with them.

She was staring dumbly at him, so he put her arms through the sleeves and buttoned the shirt up for her. As he looked at her blush stained cheeks, he couldn't help but tease her. He went behind her and wrapped his arms around her.

"You were so cute last night," he chortled in her ear.

He immediately felt her tense, her body getting warmer.

"R-Really?"

"Oh yes. Trying to dominate me when I came in the room, wearing that nightgown…You must have been planning this." When she said nothing, he nipped her neck as a warning. "Answer me."

"Yes! Yes! I was!" she cried frantically.

He smirked. "That sounds eerily similar to what you were saying last night."

"N-no! I-I didn't!"

"Oh that's right…" he whispered in a sultry voice. "I think I heard 'Ren!' instead. You and your cute little moans…"

If she wasn't red before, then she sure as hell was now.

"T-thank you…I think…"

He turned her around and hugged her against his chest. "But I hope I made you happy last night."

She looked up at him. "Were you happy?"

"Of course I was."

"Then I was too."

She suddenly fell onto her back on the mattress, taking him with her. He felt her undo the knot in his pants.

"I thought you wanted them on."

She had those eyes again.

"I changed my mind."

* * *

Later that morning, everyone was awake and breakfast was in progress. As usual, Ren and Pin-Mei sat at the head, with Rong and HoroHoro to their right, and Yoh, Anna, and Manta to their left. It was quiet as the rest of the Tao family sat down at the table, but it wouldn't stay that way for long. Ran smiled at the couple as they both took a sip of their milk.

"So, how did the two of you sleep last night?"

They both spat out what they had been drinking and looked at each other. Pin-Mei bowed her head to hide a red face. Their friends sported cat-like grins.

"Is there a problem?" En asked, a look of suspicion on his face.

Luckily, his son was a quick thinker.

"You're damn right there is! This milk is sour! I finally wake up and you give me SOUR milk?" He grabbed his fiancée by the arm and dragged her away. "Come on, Pin-Mei. We're going to find some drinkable milk."

When they were out of earshot, Ren turned to her, irritated.

"You said something didn't you?"

"What?"

"Why else would she ask that? Did you go ask her for advice or something?"

"Oh yes, of course. 'Excuse me Ran, but I plan on seducing your son tonight and giving him my virginity, and I was wondering if you were aware of any turn-ons he might have. While we're at it, can you tell me about your and En's first time? I just need some tips.'"

"GOD YOU CAN STOP NOW!" he yelled covering his face. "Thank you for giving me such an awful picture of my parents having sex. That's just what I want to think about right now." He felt her lean her head against his chest.

"I'm sorry," she whimpered. "I don't know how she found out, but if it's because of me, I'm sorry."

He sighed. "Forget about it. Just come on. We have to at least pretend we're getting new milk." He began walking down the hall, but stopped and turned around when she didn't follow him. She was staring at the ground grimly. "What is it?"

"Ren…" She walked over to him and held his hand. "I have to go back home for a while."

His eyes widened. She was leaving him again. He grabbed her shoulders, shaking her. "Why? I finally have you here with me again, and you want to go back there?"

She stared at the floor. "I have to figure things out…"

He looked at her quizzically, his grip slacking slightly. "Figure things out?"

She nodded. "I'm the only one in my family who's alive, so I have to clean up the house and decide what to do with it." She laughed sadly. "Selling it isn't really an option. Since a family of shamans has been in it, no one's going to want to live in it." She looked genuinely sad now. "Besides…I want to give my parents a proper burial." She dipped her head. "Please let me go, Ren. I have things I need to do there."

She leaned against him again and he held her.

"Alright, I'll let you go. But I'm coming with you."

* * *

"It's nice to actually walk through this place leisurely when I'm not looking around for you frantically."

"Yeah…It really is a nice house. I just never took the time to appreciate it…"

Pin-Mei walked down the dreary halls, her footsteps echoing throughout the deserted area. Ren followed a few feet behind her. Whether she was showing it or not, she was in pain. She stopped in front of a door and opened it.

"What's in there?" he asked.

"This is my room," she said softly.

They entered the room to see that the hole the stuffed animals had fallen through only a week and a half before had repaired itself. The plushies themselves were back in their places. Fan Yan and Wei Shan's doll proxies were on the ground, as motionless as ever. Ren watched as she walked over to the over-sized dolls and leaned them against the wall.

Pin-Mei looked at her plushies. "There's no way I can bring them all," she said sighing. When he didn't reply, she said, "I'll just bring my favorites." She began digging through the mountain of stuffed animals.

He watched the cotton-filled entities whiz past him as she sorted them. When she was done, there were about thirty plushies on her bed.

"What makes those so special?"

"Papa bought them for me last year, so I at least need to take these ones. The rest are ones Rong, Ling, and Shu bought me." She smiled at him. But then she noticed that he was staring past her. She looked down. Her eyes widened.

Lián was poking her.

"What the hell is that?" he asked pointing at the doll version of himself.

Pin-Mei grabbed the doll and held it against her chest, embarrassed. "I-I-I can explain."

"What the hell is that doll?"

She dipped her head so she didn't have to look at him. "Ling made it when I got home from seeing you ten years ago…I had trouble sleeping…So she made Lián for me so I could pretend that you were there…"

She felt his hand on her head and looked up. To her surprise, he wasn't mad. There was a small smirk on his face.

"I hate to say it, but that's a little…cute."

"You're not mad?"

He chortled. "No, I'm not."

"You…You wouldn't mind if I took him?"

"…As long as you kept him in a separate room. I don't want you sleeping with him. I'd feel like I had competition."

She smiled. "I'll just keep him for if you're ever not there…like a mission or something."

He paused, thinking of Yi. "Yes, it's possible that might happen at some point, but I promise it will never be when you're pregnant. If someone tries to make me go, I'll snap their neck."

She blinked, then gave an excited smile. "I'd love to see you do that. It sounds neat."

He stared at her. "You're so weird." _I don't think she realizes that it means that I would kill them._

* * *

They were soon walking through the halls again. Pin-Mei opened another door and swiftly went inside. The sheets of the giant bed inside were blood red. Fans of various sizes were hung about the room, along with a few picture frames. A mirror hung over a large antique bureau. She squinted at the bureau and saw a long box laying on its surface, and then went over and opened it.

Ren watched her lift a large bladed fan from the box and open it.

"So this room is…"

"Yes, it's Suo's."

"Why are we in here again?"

She looked back at him. "I'm taking the fans with me. I wanted to learn how to use them so badly before, and now I will."

He looked at her quizzically. "Why?"

She gave him a malicious glare that seemed to have a hint of guilt and sadness in it.

"Years ago, I decided that I wanted to kill her with her own weapon."

He stared at her. She smiled sadly.

"Not what you were expecting from me, huh? I'm supposed to be the innocent one, right?" She turned away from him. "I wanted to kill her. I wanted to so badly. I was afraid of what she would take from me. She killed Grandfather, and then Mother…She took Father away from me for so many years, then killed him, too." She was clutching the iron fan tightly. "There was almost no other feeling in my body that was as strong as the desire to see her dying on the floor before me."

He could hear her voice shaking. "Pin-Mei…"

"The scary part is…when I finally killed her, when I finally got my revenge, when I was covered in her blood, I didn't feel sorry at all. It didn't affect me. I had just killed someone, and I didn't even blink."

He touched her shoulder and turned her around, allowing him to see the many anguished tears that were cascading down her cheeks.

"I would cry every time I killed a spider…and I can't even feel a bit of remorse over killing a human being!" she screamed as she fell to her knees. "What kind of person am I becoming? Soon I'm going to be totally heartless and just kill people when they annoy me! How can you love someone like that?"

Ren sighed as he remembered his former self. She was upset about killing one person when he had killed hundreds. He knelt down in front of her.

"There's a difference between killing someone because they're a bad person and killing someone just because you feel like it. Believe me, I know," he said quietly. "And you should also believe me when I say that you're not a cold-hearted person. If you ask me, that's nearly impossible. You had your reasons for killing her, and they were pretty damn good ones. If you hadn't killed her, then you would have just kept suffering, and I don't think either of us wants that."

"But…But…"

"But nothing. I'm right and you're wrong." He stood. "If you insist on beating yourself up, then go right ahead, but I'm going to help everyone else pack your stuff."

She watched him with wide eyes as he made his way to the door, and then got up and followed him.

"Wait!" she cried grabbing his wrist.

He had to smile. He loved it when she came after him like this, when she needed him. "What is it?"

"There's one more room I have to go in, and I don't want to do it by myself…Will you come with me?"

He let her grasp his hand. "Alright. Let's go."

Ren followed her down the hall yet again until she stopped in front of a large door. Pin-Mei squeezed his hand tightly as she put her hand on the doorknob. He looked at her quizzically.

"What is it?"

"I've just never really been in this room like this before now…It was so dark..." she whispered. With that, she swung the door open and looked inside.

A large luxurious bed with blue satin sheets was in the middle of the room. Vases of flowers were on pedestals around the perimeter, and pictures were everywhere; hung on the wall, set on nightstands, low tables, anywhere there was room.

Ren stepped in after her and stared at the pictures. All of them were of Hua. No…not all of them. When he looked closer, he could see that the wall closest to his bed was adorned with pictures of his daughter. Her days as a newborn, her years as a toddler, all her years up until now. Pin-Mei walked up to the frames and touched them.

"W-Why are these here?" she whispered. She looked to see one from a New Year's celebration when she was six. "How does he have pictures..._Why_ does he have pictures from when he didn't pay any attention to me?" Her eyes darted about the wall, noticing how many of the pictures she remembered having been taken by Rong. She fell to her knees, sobbing. "Daddy…"

She felt Ren's arms around her, and closed her eyes as she leaned against him, eager to find some comfort in him.

"Looks like he loved you all along," he said. "I think that maybe he didn't know how to father you without you having a mother. He didn't know how to tell you that she died giving birth to you. Maybe he was scared. Last year, he finally realized how much you needed…how much you wanted his love and attention and left his fears in the past."

He looked up at the pictures of her in the last year, which were plentiful due to the spotlight he had placed on her. She was smiling. In many of them, she was sitting on his lap and hugging him. He smiled.

"Just remember the past year and how happy you were. How happy he was."

She nodded, the tears still flowing.

* * *

"I have a couple things I need to do before we go back. I want to say goodbye to Grandma and Grandpa Xu…I have to tell them about Daddy also…And I need to return my school uniform."

She was clutching the outfit with trembling hands. It was evident that she was not looking forward to facing her classmates.

"I'll go with you."

They walked through the dirt streets of the small town that Zhang had once called home. People stared at her, while some attempted to wave with a fake smile. Pin-Mei seemed to play along, eager to just get her task over with.

They were soon at the small farm Ren had seen in the visions Suo had shown him. Meekly, she walked up the front stairs and used the doorknocker to alert her grandparents of her arrival. A few moments later, the door opened. Xu Na stood before them, her hair with traces of white and gray.

"Pin-Mei?" she whispered. Her granddaughter nodded with a smile. The old woman wrapped her arms around her. "We haven't seen you in so long!" She looked behind the girl, confused. "Where is your father?"

Pin-Mei's eyes lowered. "Grandma, let's go sit down."

The couple could see the hearts of the Xu parents break as Pin-Mei told them everything that had happened; how their son was dead. Na cried into her husband's chest.

"Na, he died doing what he felt was right," Sun reassured her. "He always wanted Hua to be free, and what he wanted for his daughter was no different. He is happy now, Na. He is with Hua, and we can only be happy for him."

His wife nodded as she wiped her tears from her eyes. She seemed to finally notice the young man her granddaughter had brought.

"Who is this gentleman, Pin-Mei?"

Her face went red and she bowed her head. "Um…He's…He is…my…That is…"

"I'm Tao Ren, her fiancé," Ren cut in, knowing they'd be waiting a long time for an answer from Pin-Mei.

The older couple stared at them. "Engaged already?"

The younger couple nodded.

After a moment of silence, Na chuckled. "Just like Hua and whoever that person was. At least _you_ picked a handsome one."

* * *

"I really don't want to do this…"

Ren looked up at the building that was Pái Chì Academy. Its stone walls were spotless perfection and a picture of purity. He glanced at Pin-Mei, who was staring at the doors as if they were the gates of hell.

"Go on," he said to her.

She buried her face in the black fabric for a few moments and breathed deeply. She nodded. "Yeah."

Her hands shaking, she opened the glass doors and stepped inside, and he followed. They walked down the halls in silence until Pin-Mei suddenly stopped short, causing Ren to crash into her.

"You're never going to change, are you?"

"This is my homeroom," she whispered. She turned around, her back to the door. "I really don't want to do this."

He folded his arms. "Well, what's the worse that can go wrong? Tell me that."

"They're going to laugh at me."

"Why?"

"Because I'm me."

"Well, then they're not worth listening to. Just go in, hand the uniform over, and then we can go home."

She hesitated, shut her eyes tight, took a deep breath, and nodded. "Okay."

Ren gave her a small smile and patted her on the head. "I'll be right here. If they start pulling out clubs and pitchforks, I'll step in."

Pin-Mei smiled. "Okay." She turned around, took another breath, and opened the door.

"…Okay class repeat after me: ichi, ni, san…"

It was Japanese - notoriously her worst subject.

The teacher was writing on the blackboard, her back turned to the class and Pin-Mei. A couple students looked back at her and snickered. One by one, the students noticed their returning classmate. They began whispering to each other. Uneasy, Pin-Mei looked behind her to see that Ren had hidden himself outside the room. She swallowed. The fear was coming back.

"What is all this chattering?" the teacher yelled.

She turned and saw the cause for all the noise standing near the door. She forced a smile, but it was obvious that she was angry that her class was being disturbed, and by such a student no less. When she found that her smile had no effect on her pupil, she dropped it.

"Xu Pin-Mei!" she yelled, causing the young girl to cringe. "Where on Earth have you been? You've been gone almost two and a half weeks without notice!"

"M-Ma'am! Ms. Chin! I have a good expla-,"

"First you leave for over two weeks, come back, stay for barely a month, and then take off again! Do you think that you can just go on vacation whenever you please? With an attendance like this, you'll never get into high school! What sort of school would accept a child with you record anyhow?"

_Record?_ Ren thought. _What, is she secretly a yanki who steals kids' lunch money and spray paints the walls? Give me a break._ But as he thought about it, he couldn't help but chuckle a little bit. She'd ask permission to take the money and paint the walls, not just do it.

Pin-Mei cringed as she heard his small laugh. Was he making fun of her too? She pushed the idea out of her mind. _He wouldn't do that_, she reassured herself.

"I…I'm transferring to a school in Guizhou," she said confidently. "I came here to return my uniform, then I'm going to my new home – in Guizhou."

Her class stared at her as did her teacher. They obviously had been expecting to be able to criticize her for skipping school, maybe give her extra homework or keep her after for detention. But no, their little toy was leaving. Her teacher gathered herself and formulated a way to possibly make her student spill the details involving her departure.

"Oh, Pin-Mei! This is certainly a sad turn of events. What is causing you to leave us?"

Pin-Mei could feel the tears coming already. She didn't want to remember one of the reasons why she was leaving this town.

"My…" She breathed deeply to stop from crying. If those tears fell, it would leave an opening for her classmates to attack. "My father passed away last week. My grandmother did a short while later as well, so without anyone at my house to mind me, I'm going to live with-."

She stopped. What would they say if they knew she was already engaged to be married? Surely it wouldn't be anything good. Being betrothed at her age was something so old fashioned that they couldn't possibly understand.

But wait, wouldn't that be the same as denying Ren? Denying that they were together? Denying that she loved him? That she would hide their relationship because of what others would think? She thought of when Suo had pulled on her hair, commanding that she say that she would never utter the name Tao Ren for as long as she lived. She had said that she had no right to betray him. Had that changed? No, not at all. If anything, she owed him more now. He had come and rescued her. To deny him now would tell him that she didn't appreciate him saving her life.

Her teacher narrowed her eyes. "Living with who?"

"I'm going to live with my fiancé," Pin-Mei said firmly. There she had said it. She dared someone to laugh; she would laugh right back at them.

One girl giggled. "Engaged? I bet it's some ugly old coot! Like, forty!"

The boy next to her started clapping. "We thought it wasn't possible with your face and all, but you were able to shack up! Congrats on becoming a biăo zi!"

"Gōng xì! Gōng xì!" the class chanted. They laughed.

A biăo zi. That's what Ren had called her in the nightmare Suo had woven for her.

"_My little biăo zi…"_

She hadn't known what the phrase meant. But now, coupled with the one phrase she did know, "to shack up", she finally understood; she would have sex with anything that had a pulse.

"Children, children, settle down," said Ms. Chin, obviously trying to fight her own laughter.

Pin-Mei shook her head as she took a few steps backward. "It's not true!" she screamed. She dropped the uniform and covered her face, trying to hide herself from the cackling faces of her peers. "It's not true…I'm not like that," she kept whispering, as if trying to convince herself that it was the truth.

"I know you're not."

She looked up through her tears to see Ren standing beside her, his hand on her shoulder. She quickly calmed down, comforted by his presence, and he turned to glare at her teacher.

"A teacher unable to control her own class? You really don't have the respect of these children, do you?" he said, his mouth slowly turning into a smirk.

She frowned at him. "Who are you, young man?"

"I'll tell you what I'm not – a forty year-old coot." He shot the girl who had originally said the statement a death glare. She cringed and shrank in her chair. Ren turned his attention back to his main enemy. With a venomous leer, he stepped in front of Pin-Mei. "I'm Tao Ren," he said in a voice that matched his glare.

"Charming," the instructor said in a flat voice. "Do you have a pass to be in this building?"

Ren smirked and held his left hand up so he was looking at his palm. The gold band on his ring finger flashed with the same anger his eyes did. "This is the only pass I need."

She stared at it, then gave her own smirk. "So you're the fiancé our little Pin-Mei is serving. Well, I hope you find some use in her, though that may be a hard task to accomplish."

"I've had enough of your bullshit," he said sharply. "When Rong mentioned Pin-Mei having problems with classmates, I assumed it was a little name calling. I figured fourteen year-olds would have at least a little bit of maturity to stay away from such raunchy subjects, but I'm sadly disappointed."

"I really don't appreciate your vocabulary," Ms. Chin said angrily. "I must ask you to leave."

"Gladly. But first, you're going to give me her files so that I can hand them over to my school and have her transfer there." He held out his hand to receive them. When she didn't move, he snapped his fingers. "Come on, lady. I don't have all day."

Ms. Chin glared at him before stomping over to the file cabinet, removing a manila envelope and slamming the drawer shut. She grinned.

"I'll give this to you on one condition: I'm going to write a sentence in Japanese on the board. Pin-Mei must read it out loud in Chinese and then write a response in Japanese. If she succeeds, I'll give you the envelope. If not, she won't be allowed to transfer, and must remain here with me and my students." Her pupils snickered.

Without hesitation, Ren nodded. "We accept your challenge."

Pin-Mei's eyes widened. She grabbed his arm. "Ren! You shouldn't have done that! Japanese is my worst subject!"

Ren gritted his teeth and looked at the board where her teacher was writing a sentence in Japanese kanji.

"I have faith in you," he said finally.

"You do?"

"Of course I do. I'm supposed to support you when you need it, aren't I?"

She gave a small smile. "Yeah. Thanks."

"ALL RIGHT!"

The couple looked up to see the sentence Ms. Chin had crafted on the board. Ren read it quickly and frowned. He looked at Pin-Mei, who was biting her lip as she stared at the characters.

_Does she not know it?_

After about thirty seconds, she finally opened her mouth.

"'Write…'" she pushed the words out. "'…a…fact…about…your…little…boyfriend…"

She took a deep breath and looked at Ren. He nodded, and she walked up to the black board and picked up the chalk. After thinking for a moment, she slowly began writing. Ren carefully followed the movements of her hand, mentally correcting her sentence. When she was finished, she stepped back, looked at it, and put the chalk down. She walked back up to stand with her fiancé.

"Well, let's see what we have here," Ms. Chin said strolling in front of the board. She mumbled the new sentence to herself. She turned to the class. "It would seem that Miss Xu has a sense of humor."

"What does it say?" one girl asked.

"'He is the heir to a family of assassins.'"

The heir chuckled. "Damn right." He walked up to take the envelope. As he grasped it, he leaned in to whisper in the foul woman's ear. "She wasn't kidding…And I would double check that water of yours." He eyed the pitcher on her desk that had been behind her back while she was writing the sentence.

She released the envelope instantly and stared at the pitcher, shaking slightly. When she looked up again, the couple was about to walk out the door.

"Nothing good will come out of being with a girl like her!" she cried pointing at the girl beside him. "She comes from a family of shamans, you know!"

Ren grinned. "Yeah, I know. I do too." He put his hand on Pin-Mei's shoulder and began to guide her out the door. Suddenly, he stopped and turned her around again. He grabbed her hand.

"Make a fist."

"What?" she questioned, but did as she was told. He took her middle finger and stood it up. Then he displayed it for her teacher and classmates to see.

"Sayonara."

He took her hand guided her from the room. Confused, she looked up at him.

"What did that mean?"

"I'll tell you later."

Ms. Chin shook as she stared at the pitcher.

"What is it, teacher?" a student asked.

She pointed at the jug of water. "Th-That brute didn't touch my water did he?" she stammered.

"Um…" The children scratched their heads. "None of us were watching him. We were watching you write."

The woman let out a small screech as she grabbed the pitcher and poured the supposedly tainted water down the sink. She ran to refill it.

"Is it time for history yet?" one boy asked.

She nodded furiously and told the students to open their books.

"Now, to continue with what we were studying yesterday, the Tao family was known throughout China for their vast ability to assassinate any target. Their specialty was using poison…" She stopped and stared out the door, dropping the chalk she was holding.

"What is it, teacher?"

"Cl…Class dismissed…"

Ren sneezed.

* * *

_He looked down at her and smiled. Her eyes were closed, and her face was decorated with a deep blush as she panted, trying to stabilize herself. He leaned down and kissed the crook of her neck, then allowed his teeth to gently graze the skin before kissing it again. He grasped her hand as her chest continued to heave._

"_You're all mine now…No one can take you away from me – ever. You belong to me."_

_She smiled._

"_Yes…Yours…Forever…"_


	55. I'll Never Fall in Love Again

I'd been a little afraid to ask this before, but I'm doing it now. I have a proposition: No I don't want to marry any of you, sorry. But I was thinking (note the thinking) about writing a short story (20 chapters max) involving Tao Yi and Qiao Da-Xia; their meeting to their getting married to the end of Yi's revenge. Kind of a "Kakashi Gaiden" type thing. If you think it's too much, then just say so and I'll drop the idea. If you want it, same deal. Just thought I'd run it by you guys since you're awesome enough to read up to this point.

**Update 2/19/2010:** I'm really REALLY sorry about the tone of this chapter. Upon reading it again, I sense a distinct Pro-Life/Anti-Choice "Author Tract" within this and other chapters containing Hua. That, and the supposed aversion to premarital sex. I just want you all to know that this was completely unintentional, and I'm sorry if I ever offended anyone because of this. I sincerely hope that neither of these elements made the story any less enjoyable for any of you.

**Notes: This is a very HoRong heavy chapter. **

"**Aokun" means "blue boy"**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Five: "I'll Never Fall in Love Again"**

* * *

After everyone helped pack Pin-Mei's belongings, they all traveled back to Tao Castle. When they got back, the Japan crew would spend one last night there, and then they would return to their own country.

"Hey, Ren…" Pin-Mei whispered, her head on his shoulder.

"What?"

"I think I've decided what I want to do with the house."

"Oh?"

"I'm going to keep it."

He gave her a confused look. "But who's going to live in it?"

"No one just yet. But our family will eventually."

"What?"

She started playing with her fingers, a small blush on her face. "The children we have will grow up and have their own children, who will grow up and have children, who will grow up and have children…soon Tao Castle will become too small. Xu-Tao Castle will serve as their home when more space is needed." She smiled. "For that purpose, the servants will remain and Rong's family will live there for now."

Ren just blinked at her. She sure was thinking ahead.

"And…um…As the heir of her family, Rong says that the Wei family will serve the Tao family since the Fan family is gone."

He just stared at her again. "You come with quite a few extras don't you?"

She giggled and put her hand behind her head. "I guess so."

* * *

Rong and HoroHoro were sitting together in their own carriage at this time. She stared out the window at the town she was leaving. She didn't know if she would go back or not. For now, she wanted to stay with the boy next to her.

"Hey…Aokun…"

He was looking out his own window. "What?"

"Can we talk about something? Promise you won't freak?"

He shrugged. "I guess…"

"What do you think about Ren and Pin-Mei having sex?"

Silence.

"What?"

"I mean…What do you think it's done to them? Like, how it's affected them?"

"I haven't been paying attention."

She sighed. "He's been more protective of her. Like, more sensitive about what people say to and about her. I heard about what happened at her school. He didn't act as protective when we got back to his house. Not even when Pin-Mei was sleeping and he was guarding that room like a fort full of gold. But now he's defending her at every hint of danger. I can't think of a moment since then when he wasn't at her side or only a few steps behind her. It's almost as if he loves her even more now."

He mimicked her. "Any guy would act nice to a girl he just had sex with. Nothing new."

"It's been about a week."

"Well then, I'm just an idiot."

"We agree on something."

He finally turned away from the window. "What was that?" But he stared down at her as she scooted over to him and held his hand, then put her head on his shoulder. He blushed and looked away. "Why were you talking about that anyway?"

"No reason…Just thinking about it."

She took his arm and threw it behind her before leaning over and putting her head against his chest. He looked down at her for just a moment before quickly looking away again.

_I wanted a girlfriend for so long…and now…I have to push her away._

He looked down once more. Rong, whose feminine side had been awakened because of him, smiled with pink cheeks and closed eyes.

* * *

That night, her smile was gone as they stared at each other across HoroHoro's room. They could no longer run away from the reality of the next day.

"You're going back home to Japan," she whispered, her eyes beginning to burn.

He nodded. "And you're staying here."

She nodded, but then shook her head. "No, I'm going with you."

He looked away from her. "You know you can't do that. You have to run your family."

"No! My sister Li can do that! She's only two years younger than me, she can do it fine!" Rong screamed.

"Rong, calm down," he said making a downward motion with his hands. Then he shook his head. "You can't. It would be hard for you to adapt to the Ainu way of life, there's no guarantee that you would at all."

"No, please!" she cried. She ran over and thrust her arms around him, clutching his back. "Please take me with you! I can do it, I swear! If you just give me the chance-!"

"I SAID NO!" he yelled. "You're not coming to Japan with me! Look, it was fun while it lasted, but we both knew it would come to an end. I'm going, you're staying. That's all there is to it. Nothing you say is going to change my mind."

She pulled away from him, her eyes filled with tears. His hair was hiding his eyes from her. She clenched her fist and gritted her teeth in anger. But still, she softened as she looked at him.

"I love you," she whispered.

He seemed to flinch.

"There I said it. I've never said that to anyone, you know. Not even my parents. N...Not even Pin-Mei. You're the first person to hear those words. The only person to hear those words…"

He said nothing, only continued to stare at the floor. She took a deep breath, her voice choking up again.

"But that doesn't mean anything to you, does it?" Silence. "DOES IT?" More silence. "ANSWER ME DAMMIT!" She closed her tear-blurred eyes as her arm swung back and slapped him across the face. Almost as it she had taken the force of the blow herself, she fell to the floor, her body continuing to twitch with every choked breath that came out of her as the tears fell from her eyes. "I've never cried so much in my whole life…But you don't care about that either, do you?" When he continued his vow of silence, she just allowed her head to fall on the rug as she curled up into a ball like she had watched her mistress do so many times.

She felt him fall on his knees next to her. His hand came up to stroke her hair.

"Don't touch me…" she sobbed. "If you don't love me, then don't touch me."

But the hand continued to run through her burgundy locks. She shook her head violently in an effort to throw it off, but when she had stilled, it resumed its caresses.

"Stop it…You don't love me, so just stop it…"

"I never said that."

"You don't want me with you…"

"I never said that."

"By not taking me with you, you're saying it."

"I'm doing what I have to, not what I want to."

"Shut up…Just shut up…I don't believe you…"

"If that's what you want."

"I want you to take me with you."

"I can't…I'm sorry…"

She started crying again, biting her lip in an attempt to stifle herself.

"Please don't cry, Rong…You'll learn to forget about me…Then you won't be in pain anymore."

"But I…I don't want to…I'd rather be in pain than wake up one morning wondering whose headband I have."

"I'll take it with me then."

"No…I want it…"

They were silent again. All that could be heard were the soft hiccups of Rong's tears. Suddenly, she stood up and turned away from him. He soon followed.

"Horokeu…"

"What?"

"I want to make the most of tonight."

"What?"

"Even if it's just tonight…I want to make the most of it."

"Rong, you can't possibly-"

He was cut off as she kissed him and then threw him onto the bed. She loomed over him, the last of her tears falling from her eyes. With wide eyes he frantically crab-walked up the bed in an attempt to get away from her, but she was soon kneeling between his legs with her arms around his neck, her lips on his.

"Rong, don't…"

She just covered his mouth with hers again. As she pulled away, she straddled his legs and looked down at him.

"I know this makes me look 'easy' and maybe I am, but please, just give me tonight…" she pleaded with him. "If I'm never going to see you again…If you're going to go home and fall in love with someone who truly deserves it, then please just give me this one night. Because I know that I'll never fall in love again."

He looked up at her with sympathetic eyes.

"I'll be gone when you wake up," he whispered.

"I know…" she whispered back. "That's why I need this now."

He closed his eyes, fighting the last of his conflicting emotions. To do this and leave…he knew it was wrong, but he couldn't stand to see her cry anymore.

"Tonight…That's all," he whispered.

She nodded. "Thank you…"

As a pile of clothes accumulated on the floor, they switched places; Rong now on the mattress, and HoroHoro leaning over her.

"Horokeu?"

"What?"

"I know this may be too much to ask, but can you lie to me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Will you tell me you love me?"

He stared deep into her eyes. They were filled with pain, like someone who had been forced to throw away their childhood to take care of someone whom she had claimed to love. He knew it was only because she had never experienced what love was; that she thought what she had done all her life for a small girl named Xu Pin-Mei had been "love". He shook his head.

"I can't lie, Rong. Not about something like that."

Her eyes lowered. "Oh…I understand."

To her surprise, he kissed her.

"I love you," he said, smiling down at her.

For a moment, she was confused. He had just told her he couldn't lie about love, so why…?

As he watched it dawn on her face, he cupped her cheek.

"I love you," he said again.

She touched his hand as the tears came again. "I love you," she whispered hoarsely.

Just as he wiped the tears away, she pulled him down against her in a tight embrace, which he reciprocated when he was able. Then he let her go and looked down at her with a mischievous grin.

"Let's do this."

For the first time in almost two weeks, she gave him her famous cocky grin.

"Talk big after you've shown me what you can do, Aokun. Impress me."

The grin got wider. "Oh, you'll be impressed alright."

Famous last words.

* * *

HoroHoro glanced at the clock. Five in the morning.

He glanced down at Rong, who was sleeping soundly, a very happy and content smile on her face. A few pieces of hair were in her face and he brushed them back and tried to smile. As his hand settled near her face, she moaned and grasped it. Sadly, he leaned down and kissed her, then began gathering his things.

As Yoh called from the other side of the door, he shushed him and put the piece of wood he had been whittling on his pillow. He shook his head quickly as a tear threatened to fall. Guilt overcame him as he looked down at the woman who had spent the night satisfying his every desire. He was leaving without a goodbye.

"HOROHORO! COME ON OR WE'LL MISS THE PLANE!"

He ran to the door and opened it. "I'm coming. Don't yell or you'll wake Pin-Mei up, and Ren'll be pissed."

He looked back once more, fighting the urge to cuddle her one last time. Another weak smile.

"Wei Rong, you're the bitchiest headstrong macho chick I've ever met...But you're also kind, romantic, and giving...A real puzzle." He chuckled and shook his head. "All the same, you're the first and only girl I've ever loved...and who loved me back...Thanks for loving me.

Sayonara."

He stepped outside and slowly closed the door, looking until he could no longer see her face.

* * *

The next morning, Rong woke up and looked to her left. He was gone, just as she knew he would be. She squinted at the pillow he had used and saw a small wooden stick. She quickly grabbed it and examined it.

There was a note attached. She unraveled it and quickly read its short phrase.

"_I'll come back for you."_

She stared at it.

"But you said I couldn't go with you, that I couldn't live like you…Why are you promising me something that you've already said won't happen?" she whispered hoarsely as if he could hear her.

She looked down at the stick. It looked much like his Ikupasuy, yet the carvings on it were clumsier, less refined. A message seemed to be written on the back in Ainu. She stared at it for a few minutes, then frowned.

"You asshole, you know I can't read this."

There was a knock at the door. Rong panicked and searched for a shirt. She stopped for a moment as she saw one of his on the floor along with his shorts, but threw them on just so she could answer the door.

"Yes?" she called as she zipped up the black bottoms.

"Rong? You're in here?"

It was Pin-Mei. Her breathing stopped for a moment, then she tried to regain the brash part of her that had been lost.

"You must have known _someone_ was in here since you knocked."

"Hehe, yeah, I guess." Then her smile faded. She held Rong's hand. "Are you okay?"

Rong blinked. "About what?"

Pin-Mei looked away slightly. "Well, HoroHoro went back home, and…um…"

The guard jerked her hand away. "Me? I'm over it already. He's probably the one on the plane crying. He'll come crawling back, and I'll just stomp on him. I don't have time for infantile behavior such as him. I'm…I'm glad he's gone!"

Her mistress looked up at her sympathetically. "If you say so…" She walked away down the hall, Ren meeting her around the corner.

When she was gone, Rong went back into the room and fell on the bed. She hugged the pillow with her face in it, trying to take in the last of his scent that it contained. It soon became wet.

"If you lied to me…I'll hate you forever…"

* * *

**Three months later…**

* * *

"I'm kinda worried about Rong," Pin-Mei said suddenly as she and Ren were walking down the hall.

"Why?" he asked turning to her.

"Well…She's been sick for a long time…And um…I think she's gotten a little chubby. She sometimes seems much more tired than usual. She's not acting like herself."

Ren turned the information over in his head. An idea popped into his head, but he dismissed it. _No, that's not even possible._ "Like you said, she's probably just sick. Maybe she's still depressed about HoroHoro going back to Japan and leaving her here. Who knows?" He sighed. "Just remember, she'll be twenty next year; she's perfectly capable of taking care of herself."

They passed a door which lead to the bathroom. Pin-Mei stopped. Ren looked back at her.

"What is it?"

She looked afraid. "Didn't you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"I thought I heard gagging…"

He gave her a weird look. "You're hearing things."

But as he said that, he heard it too. He looked at the door with alarmed eyes. She moved out of the way as he grabbed the door knob and turned it. Locked. He grunted and pounded on the door.

"Rong! Are you in there?"

He put his ear to the door so he could hear her from the other side of the large bathroom.

"Yes, but I'm fine, Lord Ren," she replied, her voice muffled before she gagged again.

"Open the door! I need to use the bathroom!" This was a lie.

"Can you please use the one in the next wing? I may be a while…" But this was true. Ren could have easily run down the hall for about thirty seconds and reached another bathroom.

"Don't disobey me! Open the goddamn door!"

More gagging.

"I'll be out soon, I promise."

He hit the door again before backing up and aiming his shoulder at it. Pin-Mei was confused, but went over to him.

"Ren, what are you doing?"

"Breaking down the door."

"WHAT? Why?"

"Look, I'll tell you when we get in. Rong might need us right now." She looked worried. "I won't hurt myself, and we can get someone to fix the door, alright?"

She took a few steps back. "Okay…Be careful…"

He nodded at her before taking a quick breath in and charging at the door. He used his shoulder to ram into it, the force busting it open, giving them entrance into the lavatory.

Ren stared at his fiancée's keeper, who was on her knees in front of the marble toilet, leaning over it, pale-faced. She looked up at him with a face that had only one possible sentence to go with it: "Oh Shit."

"Rong, it's time you stop hiding this and tell me before I have to drag it out of you," he said folding his arms.

Pin-Mei came in behind him. "Rong…What is he talking about?"

Rong looked at her with pained eyes, then they rolled back and she began falling sideways.

"Shit." He ran and then slid across the floor to catch her before she hit it. After repositioning her, he picked her up and carried her to a guest room. A servant skeptically brought a bucket to them as he laid her on the bed. He stood over her as she opened her eyes.

"Okay, last time, tell me what's going on."

She looked away from him, seemingly ashamed. Pin-Mei kept looking at them, confused.

"What's going on?"

Ren looked at her, then back at Rong. "I'm telling her."

She looked at both of them. "Telling me what?"

"Rong's pregnant."

Pin-Mei's eyes widened as she silently covered her mouth. "How…?"

Ren ignored her and looked back at the woman on the bed. "How far along are you?"

She breathed. "Three months."

Now Ren's eyes widened. He stared at his fiancée, then ran over to her and grabbed her shoulders. "You haven't been acting sick either, have you?"

Pin-Mei, with a scared look on her face, shook her head quickly. "No, no I haven't."

"As she is right now, Lady Pin-Mei is infertile."

Ren looked back at Rong. "What do you mean?"

"Lord Zhang was from a family of doctors, so he knew all about mixing herbs and making medicine." Her voice was tired, her left arm crossing her face and over her eyes. "He feared that Suo would harm Lady Pin-Mei if she knew that she had the potential to become pregnant, so he came up with a pill for her to take that would prevent that from happening. In the month you two were separated, he taught her how to make it because he knew he was going to die soon. So Lady Pin-Mei has been making it herself once a month to silence the hormone that would otherwise cause her to become pregnant. I do not have such a medicine because I never planned on needing it, thus, the differing results." She slowly sat up and folded her hands staring into space.

Ren looked at Pin-Mei, who was looking down at the ground in shame. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

He shook his head. "Don't be sorry, it's alright…I wish you had told me, though." He heaved a heavy sigh. "But it's a relief. I don't want that strain put on your body. We already know what could happen…"

She nodded slowly, and they turned back to the Wei heir.

"So when did this happen?" Ren asked, becoming serious once again.

She looked away. "My Lord, I do not feel comfortable disclosing such information."

He narrowed his eyes. "You refuse?"

She squeezed her intertwined hands. Personal or not, she was disobeying an order, something had very seldom done before.

"It was HoroHoro, wasn't it?"

Her head lifted slightly, shocked. Then she leaned her forehead on her hands. "Yes."

He shifted his weight as he studied her, a quiet grunt escaping him. It was no secret that he had seen them together since the very moment he was revived. All the same, it seemed a tad fruitless to engage in such an act right before his departure. Despite this thoughts, he remained silent.

But Rong saw his gaze, immediately able to deduce what he was thinking. "I know...it seems foolish to you. We did it knowing that we might never see each other again. I wanted to do it _because_ of that...I wanted to...I wanted him...I don't know..." She grabbed at her hair.

"Remember you."

She looked up. "What?"

Ren did also. Pin-Mei sat next to her on the bed and held her hand, tears in her eyes.

"You didn't want him to forget about you. You weren't thinking about this. You just wanted him to know, even if he was leaving, that you love him." She looked down. "I've heard about similar things with people going into the military. Girlfriends who would normally refuse to give their virginity to their boyfriends give in when they find out they're going away, with the possibility that they won't return. I know that if it were me…" she looked back at Ren. "…I would feel the same way." She returned to Rong. "It doesn't make you a whore or anything silly like that. You did it for love. You weren't trying to trap him in any way. You wanted him to remember how strongly you felt about him. I only hope that his feelings were just as strong."

"Pin-Mei…"

"You have to go to him."

Rong shook her head. "I can't…I can't face him knowing I've just stolen his life from him. I've just taken away the best years of his life…And he didn't get to experience any of it." She stared at the sheets. "I'm going to get an abortion."

"No! You can't!" Pin-Mei cried, her eyes filling up with tears again.

"Pin-Mei!" Ren yelled, silencing her. "You are not the mother of that baby, so you have no say in what happens to it." He looked to Rong. "Just make sure you think about that before you do it. Think until your brain hurts, and even then, keep thinking. That baby is only the size of a cherry right now, but it has nearly everything we do, right down to fingernails. It can move its arms. It may not be breathing, but right now, it looks more human than you think."

Rong stared at him, then covered her face and began breathing deeply as she tried to control her crying. Ren looked down at her apathetically. Pin-Mei gave him a hurt glance, which he responded to.

"Don't you think it's better that she knows now, than do it and then find out that by this point it wasn't just a mass of cells without a heartbeat?"

She nodded sadly. Rong wiped her eyes and stood, only to get into a kowtow position in front of Ren.

"Lord Ren, I humbly ask for a leave of absence so that I may go and take care of some business in Japan. I do not yet know how long I will be gone, but I would let you know when that information became available to me," she said in the most formal of voices.

Ren looked down at her. Her forehead was touching the floor, the deepest form of respect.

"Permission granted."

* * *

"Lord Ren, Wei Li has arrived."

Ren, Pin-Mei, and Rong turned to see a tall girl walking towards them. Like Rong, her hair was boyishly short, but maroon. In fact, the color of her hair seemed to be the only thing that made it possible to distinguish the sisters from each other sans an inch or two in height difference.

She dropped to one knee in front of Ren, her right fist making contact with the floor while her left arm rested on her left knee.

"Lord Ren, I am honored-"

"Li, kowtow," Rong said stiffly. She watched her seventeen year-old sister blush and quickly flop down into the formal bow as she was told.

"Lord Ren, I am honored to be able to serve you and your family. I will perform my duties perfectly and expect punishment for anything I fail to do."

Ren gave Rong a raised eyebrow. It seemed as though Li was raised to expect punishment at any point in time, and may very well be numb to the sensations of said punishments.

"Rise." He gestured at Rong with his head and she stepped forward.

The sisters stared at each other. Li had followed Rong since she could walk, and would watch her perform her duties in awe and admiration. She wanted nothing more than to have her own person to guard and protect - to earn the respect of her elder sister.

"Your back," Rong said in a commanding voice.

Without hesitation, Li turned to show her the tattoo that had been cut into her only days before. As with Rong's tattoo, "Wei Li" was around the circumference of a circle in the center of her back. " Pin-Mei" and "Tao Ren" were carved into her.

"Why isn't Pin-Mei's surname there?" Ren asked.

Rong turned to him. "I asked that it be left out until you both get married so we can write "Tao" there. It would be a waste to write "Xu" at this point."

Pin-Mei looked down, blushing.

"Face me," Rong commanded. Her sister obeyed. "Be prepared to go out for random milk trips when it 'suddenly' runs out. Have fresh towels ready at a moment's notice. Ignore any voices you hear from their room at night. And lastly…" She turned to the couple. "Be ready to give your life for the two of them. Lord Ren and Lady Pin-Mei's safety comes before all else." She leaned in to whisper in her sister's ear. "Don't fall in love with anyone in this house. Don't fall in love at all."

Her sister nodded. "I understand my duties and will perform them-,"

"And don't act like a mindless drone. Sometimes, you need to have a sense of humor with these two."

"Gotcha."

"Much better."

Rong slowly turned to walk back up to the couple.

"Well, I guess I'll be going." She looked at Pin-Mei. "It was an honor to care for you. I'll miss that smile of yours." The girl started crying. Rong chuckled. "The tears as well."

Pin-Mei leaped and hugged her, careful of Rong's special passenger. When she was released, Rong looked to the man who she had once looked at as a rival for her Lady's attention. They said nothing. He nodded at her, and she nodded back.

"Take care of her."

"I will." A beat of silence. "Good luck."

Rong looked shocked for a moment, then accepted it with a smile. "Thank you."

She walked to a carriage that was waiting for her. With only one small bag, she got in without looking back. The carriage soon left the gates of Tao Castle. As Ren and Pin-Mei watched it disappear, he remembered the tone of her last two words to him.

He knew it was for more than his wish for good luck.


	56. Hall Om Mig Nu

It was pretty dramatic last chapter, ne? I hadn't really planned on turning the fact that Rong's pregnant into a whole big thing. I was just going to have a few years pass and then have the kid show up with the age of how many years had gone by, so you could piece it together yourselves. Ah well. Things change. But it sounds like one of those teen drama shows. "ZOMG Marsha slept with Jimmy but she's having Tommy's baby! LAWLS!" I was also originally going to have Ren "banish" Rong from the castle as a way of making her go to Japan. Then I remembered that the idea was stupid.

**Notes: I am taking a little creative liberty with the Ainu. According to research some dude did, in 1996, only 15 people could speak the Ainu language fluently. FIFTEEN. I'm making it so everyone knows it.**

**It should be noted that the amount of weight Rong has gained is 5-10 lbs. So she has a little bit of a belly…it makes her oh so cuddly xD**

**I don't actually know if a special Ainu drink exists. It just sounded like a good thing at the time. We're ignoring HoroHoro's parents. Because we never see them in the anime, which is the canon I'm using. And they'd just throw a hissy fit if they knew what's going on.**

**I think by now you've noticed that Rong only calls HoroHoro by his real name when she's being serious.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Six: Håll Om Mig Nu (Hold Me Now)**

* * *

Rong stood on the side of a mountain in Hokkaido where she could see the Ainu village up ahead. The cold, brisk wind was stinging her ears and tossing her bangs every which way. She slowly reached into the pocket of her coat and pulled out HoroHoro's headband. After clutching it, she slipped it on over her ears, pushing her bangs back and away from her face. Once again, she looked up at the village.

"I feel nauseous…and it's definitely not morning sickness."

Slowly, she started walking up the hill, hoping that she would have the courage to tell the man she loved what was happening to her. She finally reached the top, and paused before walking in the direction of a column of smoke.

An elderly couple clad in Ainu robes sat near a bonfire carving wood and making jewelry. Taking a deep breath, Rong strolled over to them, trying to act as cool and casual as she could.

"Excuse me?"

They looked up at her with suspicious faces.

"Um…I'm looking for Horokeu…Usui Horokeu…Do you know where I might find him?"

They stared at her and she instantly felt uneasy. She should have known better than to ask senior members of the tribe for assistance. Of course they would be the most suspicious of outsiders. She sighed and was about to turn away when the woman murmured something to her husband while pointing at the headband Rong was wearing. Almost as if on cue, the mock-Ikupasuy HoroHoro had carved for her fell from her jacket. The woman took it and showed it to her husband. They conversed for a few moments.

"Could you tell me what it says?" Rong asked earnestly.

But the woman seemed to ignore her. "Pirika!" she called.

Rong just stood there blinking. "Pirika?"

"What is it, grandmother?"

She turned to see a teenaged girl with long blue hair walking over to them. Her grandmother handed her the piece of wood and began speaking to her in Ainu. Rong heard "Horokeu" in the dialogue, and her headband was pointed at once again. When they were done, Pirika turned to her.

"What do you want my brother for? And why do you have his headband?" she asked putting her hands on his hips.

'_I just need a couple minutes to let him know I'm pregnant with his child,' wouldn't go over well._ "I'm a friend of his, and he invited me to come see him."

"Oh." She looked irritated. "He could have told me, the idiot." She sighed. "Come on, I'll take you to our house."

Rong followed the girl to a small house with a hut nearby; the living situations of the modern generation of Ainu. Pirika opened the door and looked around.

"Oniichan! There's someone here to see you!" she called. There was no reply. She looked down at the mat near the doorway. "His shoes aren't here. He must have gone out." Another annoyed sigh. "Honestly, he never tells me anything. Just make yourself at home until he comes back."

Rong fidgeted. "Where do you think he went?"

Pirika looked around again. "His snowboard is gone, so he's probably goofing off with Kororo on the snow cliffs."

Rong nodded slightly. _Another thing I'm taking away from him. _She stumbled and grabbed the door frame for stability. _Shit…not here…Not in front of his sister…_

"You okay?"

Rong tried to smile. "Yeah. Sorry, just a little tired."

"Oh, well, just go sit on the couch then."

"…Thanks."

The minute she sat down, she blacked out.

* * *

She woke up what she heard the front door close. At first, her vision was blurry, but it slowly came into focus. She could hear muffled voices.

"There's a girl here to see you. Says she's friend of yours."

"A friend? I don't have any girl friends, you know that. Besides, what would they come all the way out here for?"

"Like I would know. She fell asleep as soon as she got in here. At least act like you know her so she'll be satisfied and go home."

"Okay, okay, I hear you…"

He groaned as he dropped his snowboard at the door and threw his boots off. Rong could feel her heart racing as his footsteps got closer and closer. She hurriedly tried to stand up, but felt dizzy and fell back into her seat. In a last ditch effort, she stood slowly, gaining her footing just as he entered the room.

He froze. She looked at him shamefully, then lowered her eyes.

"Rong…"

She forced a weak smile. "Hey, Aokun."

"You…You…"

_I'm about to ruin your life…_

"You gained weight," he said flatly.

A vein popped. Rong's eyes flared as she pulled back and punched him, sending him across the room. He hit the wall, blood trickling from his nose.

"You jackass! You're supposed to say something like 'How have you been?' or 'I'm so glad you're here,' or 'I missed you,' not point out negative things like that!" she yelled shaking her fist at him.

HoroHoro wiped his nose. "Jeez, you haven't changed. Still a macho chick."

Rong was about to pick him up and continue beating him when he wrapped his arms around her. He leaned his forehead down to touch hers.

"How have you been?" he whispered.

She stopped.

"I'm so glad you're here,"

Her eyes quivered.

"I missed you."

She clutched the back of his shirt. "I needed to see you again," she whispered. "I couldn't be by myself right now…"

He smiled at her. "Well, if you were looking for company, you came to the right place."

Pirika walked in as their lips touched and he slipped his tongue into her mouth.

"Hey Oniichan, what's going on with that-,"

She froze as she took in the scene before her.

"I-I'm going shopping, bye!" She grabbed her purse and ran out of the house, leaving her brother alone with his lover. Neither seemed to notice.

HoroHoro pulled her tighter against him. As her stomach was pressed against his body, she flinched and pushed him away hastily, clutching it. He blinked at her, then smiled.

"You must be hungry after coming all the way from China, is that it? Come on, I'll make you something."

As he headed to the kitchen, she reached out, almost as if to stop him, but retracted her hand. She followed him silently.

_I have to tell him…_

"Let's get you something to drink first."

Rong took a few steps toward him as he headed for the cabinets.

"Aokun..."

He hummed an annoying tune as he took down a couple glasses from a cabinet, then a pair of bowls as well. "So what do you want?" She said nothing. "I'll get the 'special guest' drink. I call it 'Ainu Juice'. Pirika punches me every time I say that."

"HoroHoro…"

He took the cork off a bottle. "I think you'll like it though. There isn't alcohol in it, so it's fine for us to drink."

"Horokeu…"

He began pouring the drinks. "It gets fizzy though, so watch it out…"

"I'm pregnant."

HoroHoro dropped the bottle. It smashed on the floor, sending glass and liquid all over the room. He slowly turned to look at her, his eyes wider than any look of horror she had seen before. He smiled nervously.

"What…What did you say?"

She desperately tried to keep her voice steady. "I…I'm pregnant…Because of that night…"

He stared at the floor, obviously trying to take in what he had just heard. He seemed to almost be shaking his head slowly. The look in his eyes finally made her lose control.

"I'm sorry Horokeu…I'm so sorry…" she whispered as collapsed on the floor. She landed on some glass, but she didn't care. "I never meant for this to happen…I'm so sorry…"

When he said nothing, she got even more upset, even a little scared.

"I…I was going to get an abortion, but after what Ren told me, I can't…I just can't! It's not the baby's fault I made the mistake of sleeping with you! I'm keeping it…I have to…I have to give it a chance at life!"

She quieted down for a moment, getting ready to suggest the one option that killed her to even think about.

"If you don't want to be in the baby's life, then tell me now, and I'll go home and never bother you again. It's your life, and I have no right to ruin it because of what I did and the choice I'm making." She closed her eyes and her head drooped towards the floor. There was silence.

"The Ainu believe that all life is precious," came a whisper.

Rong slowly lifted her head. "What?"

"We worship the trees, the animals…To us, everything has a spirit, and we respect and protect that spirit."

He turned and walked over to her, using his foot to clear the glass from in front of her. He sat cross-legged in front of her and held her hand.

"I'm glad you chose to keep it," he said. "It would kill me to know that you allowed something so innocent to die."

She looked at him, guilt still swelling in her eyes. He smiled weakly and pulled her into his lap so her back was against his chest. She flinched as he carefully pulled a few pieces of glass from her legs.

"You have to take better care of yourself now," he said. "Someone else is depending on you to protect them." He put his hand on her stomach.

She turned her head away. "This is because I was reckless. I don't want to cause trouble for you because of my stupidity."

She shuddered as she felt his lips on her neck.

"Why are you talking like what we did was a mistake?"

"Because…this happened. Neither of us wanted this. If I hadn't pushed you, this wouldn't have happened."

He hugged her close to him. "Know what I think?"

"What?"

"I think it would have happened anyway."

"What? Why? How?"

He smiled. "Think about it. I could have easily said no. But I didn't, did I?"

"Apparently not."

"I didn't make love to you out of pity. I did it because I wanted to. I wouldn't just throw my first time away like that."

Rong heaved a heavy sigh. "A couple of virgins have sex and one ends up pregnant. Why didn't I see this coming?"

He chuckled and then gently hugged her tighter. "I don't regret that night. I don't regret it for even a second. I'm glad I chose you…and kinda flattered that you chose me."

She blushed. "Yeah…well…whatever…"

HoroHoro held both her hands. "But I won't leave you." He squeezed them. "I promise."

She hesitated. "…Even when I become a beach ball?"

"Especially then."

She looked back at him, her eyes shimmering. "Horokeu…"

"…I hear that's when your sex drive goes through the roof."

Rong fumed and poked him in the eyes. "I really hope you aren't expecting sex for another six months. It'll kill the baby."

He rubbed his eyes and blinked many times before his vision returned. "Jeez, Rong. I'd rather you just punch me instead." She glared at him. "Anyway, no, it won't."

"Yes, it will."

"No, it won't."

"YES IT WILL!"

"No, it won't."

"You're a boy – what the hell do you know?"

He stared at her. "More than you apparently. I'm taking you to a library or a doctor or something…It's more than a little sad that I, and according to you, Ren know more about being pregnant than you do."

She puffed her cheeks. "Screw you."

He sighed. "The mood swings are already settling in…"

Surprisingly, she let this slide. She turned on her side and leaned back against his chest. "Can I stay here a while? …I don't want to go home right now."

He rubbed the shoulder that wasn't against him. "Of course."

He forced Rong to sit in a chair while he cleaned up the mess of glass and "Ainu Juice" on the floor.

"Why can't I help you?"

"Here, we basically "baby" the woman who's pregnant because, more often then not, they're just as stubborn as you are and refuse to take it easy."

She nodded slowly. "Fine…I just don't want any pity from people. I won't allow it."

"No one's pitying you…"

"Because I made sure they wouldn't."

He put the glass in a series of plastic bags, then put it in the trash. "What does your family think about this?"

Rong froze. "They don't know yet. I _did_ call my sister Li to take over my duties, but I had to do it behind my parents' backs. I don't know how to tell them…Chances are they'll disown me…"

He looked at her sympathetically. Part of him wanted to know more, but he wasn't willing to ask her. Instead, he took out some cookware.

"I'll make us some dinner and then we can go to bed."

"Alright…"

* * *

That night, Rong put on the clothes HoroHoro had left in their room three months earlier.

"Nice PJs," he said grinning.

She blushed and looked away. "A lot of my clothes just don't fit anymore, okay? You don't need to rub it in. I'm getting new ones tomorrow." When she looked at him again, he was sitting on the loveseat.

He patted his knee. "C'mere."

She frowned. "I'm not five."

"Never said you were, now get over here."

She finally did as she was told and sat on his lap. With her body so close to him, he could feel her cold skin as she shivered uncontrollably.

"Why didn't you tell me you were cold?" He reached over and grabbed a soft blanket, and then wrapped it around her. "Remember, we have someone else to think about too."

She nodded subtly and then leaned and put her forehead in the crook of his neck. "Will you…just hold me for a while?"

He smiled. "Of course."

"Thank you…"

As she lay in his arms, he kissed her ear. He began trailing more kisses down her neck, but she suddenly craned it so it was out of his reach.

"I'm sorry…I just…have a lot on my mind…"

A twinge of pain flashed in his eyes, but he quickly dismissed it. He gently ran a hand through her hair. "Can I do this?"

She smiled. "Yeah."

There was silence for a few minutes until HoroHoro decided it was too much.

"Will you tell me what's going on?" he asked.

Rong hesitated. She didn't know if he'd understand. She didn't know if she wanted him to know about her family. But…

_What does it mean when I can't even trust the father of my child?_

"I'm worried…no…scared…of how my parents, especially my father, are going to react to this."

"Yeah, you said something about being disowned. I don't think they'd do that. Yeah, it's shocking, but once they get over that, they'll be just as excited as I am."

"You don't understand…No woman of Wei blood is allowed to be pregnant."

He shifted her so he could look at her face. "What? How can they do that? How does your family carry on?"

Rong lowered her eyes. "The sons…they marry strong women arranged for them by the parents. Those women are the ones who give the family children." She smiled sadly. "I'm not supposed to be pregnant…I'm not even supposed to be in love. It's against my family's rules." She lowered her eyes, her voice unsteady. "It's such a serious offense, that they may cast me out."

"But you're the head of the guards, aren't you? They can't disown you so easily if you have such a high position!"

She shook her head. "There's a simple reason why my sisters and I aren't allowed to become pregnant."

"Which is…?"

"How would I be able to protect Pin-Mei if I was worried about caring for my unborn child, making sure it wouldn't get hurt?"

He fell silent. "I see…"

She looked away. "I told Li to never fall in love...But really, for her, it would be allowed. There are no Fan or Tao children that need guarding, so another sister can easily take her place if she were to become pregnant. For me, though…"

"…It's different since you have Pin-Mei."

She nodded. "But also…because of what you are, I'm afraid that they would try to force me…us…into handing over the baby if it turned out to be a girl."

He cocked an eyebrow. "What I am?"

Rong hesitated before speaking. "Many, many years ago, an Ainu woman from one of the Chinese tribes was forced to marry into the Wei family. It's because of your build, your athleticism…They want those qualities for the daughters, for the guards. If they found out about you, male or female, they may try to take the baby away."

"Don't they understand that it's your child?"

"Don't misunderstand. They're not evil, they're just…loyal…obsessed. Throughout our history, protecting the daughters of the Qiao family, and then the Fan family was the only thing on their minds. I know how important it is to them to have strong daughters to fight for their chosen ones and strong sons to carry on the family, but this…" She put her hand on her stomach. "This is mine! Why should I have to hand over their childhood, their freedom to people who never even tell their children they love them? Can't they appreciate the dedication I have to raising this child and making it feel loved and helping it grow up to be a good person?"

He kissed her. "Even if they can't, I can," he said. "You knew there would be hardships, you knew it meant coming here and telling me, even seemingly preparing to take care of the baby yourself if I rejected it. You knew you could have taken the easy way out and said "I'm not doing this." But you didn't. You chose to keep it, even though it meant going against your family. In my eyes, that makes you extremely brave. You could even say that I sort of admire you for it." He blew gently in her ear. "Just another reason why I love you."

Her face turned beet red. "Don't spew out stuff like that…It's nothing special."

He nuzzled her. "After the baby is born, you'll understand."

Silence.

"Will you come with me?"

"Where?"

"To tell my parents…"

"I was going to whether you invited me or not."

She looked up at him. "You were? Why?"

HoroHoro smiled and cupped her cheek. "Because you didn't make that baby yourself. I have a large part in this, and I'm not backing out. Even if they can't understand us, and they can't accept you, I'm going to take care of you."

"Horokeu…"

"And baby you so much that you'll forget you're the mom."

"Ugh…"

He laughed, then his smile turned malicious. "Your family is about to fall victim to my pigheadedness and stubborninity."

"At least use real words. Dummy."

"What happened to 'jackass'?"

"You don't deserve that title anymore."

"I don't know whether to be happy or sad."

The conversation ended abruptly as she suddenly fell asleep on his chest. The Ainu sighed and shook his head. Then he picked her up and set her down on the futon they would be sharing. He gently removed her (his) headband from her hair, then his own and set them on the floor near the futon.

"Pirika won't be here for the next few days. I asked her to stay with some friends so we could be alone," he said, knowing she couldn't hear him. He stroked her cheek. "I know you're scared, but I meant what I said; I'm not backing down. I'm going to stay with you and help you through this." He kissed her forehead and then laid down behind her and wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you,"

* * *

"Are you sure this is safe?"

"Of course it is. I wouldn't do it if it wasn't."

"It's not like I can't walk on my own."

"I just don't want you to slip and fall, okay?"

"Somehow, I feel that falling by myself would be better than this."

"Well, let's go."

"Wait, wait, WAIT!"

HoroHoro leaned forward, sending his snowboard down the hill, Rong in his arms. He had insisted that this was safer than her walking down the hill, for fear of her falling and hurting herself and her passenger. So now she had her arms around his neck, clinging for dear life as he flew down the hill. There were no obstacles to get in their way, so he had no trouble reaching the bottom.

"See that wasn't so hard, was it?" he said as he smiled down at her.

Rong looked like she was within two inches of death.

"Never. Again. NEVER."

"Oh, come on. It was fine. You're fine. The baby's fine. I'm ALWAYS fine. We're all fine."

He put her down and started detaching himself from his snowboard. After he had put it on his back, he looked up to see that Rong had left him in the dust.

"RONG! WHY DIDN'T YOU WAIT FOR ME?" he yelled as he ran up to her.

"You're trying to kill me! Why wouldn't I want to get away from you?" she cried.

No sooner had she finished her sentence did she fall to the ground. HoroHoro discarded the snowboard and ran up to her. He quickly got her to her feet and frantically began brushing the snow off her.

"Are you okay? You're not hurt are you? Neither of you, I mean…"

Rong looked at him for a moment, almost confused. Then she smiled as she watched him gently brush the snow off the midsection of her coat.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Let's just go to the store and get out," she said softly. "I don't like shopping."

She walked past the Ainu and he grumbled something as he went to retrieve what he had left behind. After he had gotten his snowboard and caught up with her, he looked away from her, annoyed because he thought she didn't appreciate his efforts to help her. Rong smiled and slipped her hand into his. He snapped his head back to look at their hands and then at her. She was looking forward, still smiling.

"Don't let me fall, okay?"

He smiled. "Alright."

They walked to the closest city and Rong began her (hopefully quick) search for clothes. She hurriedly tried things on in a department store, bought them, and left, and then bought two shirts in a maternity store, not even bothering to see if they fit her or not.

HoroHoro stared at her. "Oi, if you're going to spend money, shouldn't you at least make sure you're buying the right stuff?

She didn't look at him. "I don't like trying things on. It stresses me out. Especially now."

"Why?"

"I don't like it when things don't fit. It makes me nervous. It makes me feel like I'm not taking care of myself…I'm always scared that when I try something on, I'll be a larger size…and now I am. Even if it's for a different reason, I don't like it."

He sighed. "What is it with you girls and being so fussy about what you look like?" He gestured to the leather fitted trench coat, which covered her stomach before flowing out to either side of her. "I mean, look at yourself. With that coat of yours, I can't tell that you look different at all. On the other hand, some girls just wear things that scream 'I TOTALLY PIGGED OUT ON OREOS AND POCKY LAST NIGHT! LOOK AT ME!'"

She covered his mouth as some people on the street stared at them. "Shh! Don't be so loud! You're embarrassing me!"

"See? There you go. You're afraid of what these people think. You're afraid that at dinner tonight, those people are going to say, 'Today, there was this total jackass and his girlfriend, who looked like she weighed 3000 lbs., on the street today. He was being totally loud. I'm going to remember their total idiocy for the rest of my life.' Well, guess what – these people will have forgotten all about us by the time they go get something for lunch. You have to stop worrying about what other people think."

She looked away from him, uneasy.

"Every time you do, you have to buy me lunch."

"What? No way!"

"Now who's being loud?"

She stopped and looked down, her face red. He chuckled.

"Come on. Let's get some lunch. I'll pay this time."

"I really want some chilled milk pudding…" Rong said listlessly.

"What the hell is that?"

"My favorite dessert back home…" She looked at the ground. "I want pickles…"

"What about the pudding?"

"Watermelon…"

"DECIDE!"

"Ice cream…"

"Okay, I'm getting you a cheese burger with pickles, watermelon sherbet for dessert, and a drink of milk."

"Alright…"

HoroHoro let out a heavy sigh. _Only another six months of random cravings left to go…_

* * *

"A movie theatre?"

"Yeah, haven't you ever been to one?"

She shook her head. "No. The town that Pin-Mei and I come from doesn't have things like that. It's not very modern."

He grinned and pulled her inside. "You're going to love this!"

"Wait, what?"

He sat her down and handed her a bag of popcorn as the lights dimmed. The movie started playing and she stared at it.

"What's this about?"

He smiled to himself. "Snowboarding."

She rolled her eyes. "Predictable…"

"Just kidding. I actually don't know. I just liked the title."

"What was it?"

"Can't remember."

She groaned. But as they watched it, she actually found herself becoming immersed in the story.

A girl and boy traveled with four other people so that the girl could pray at shrines and save the world from destruction. At the final shrine, the hired bodyguard betrayed the group and stole the girl's soul. The rest of the movie dealt with the four remaining members of the group traveling to another world so that they could recover the soul of their beloved friend.

Toward the end of the movie, the girl's soul was returned. The boy had been by her side the whole time, fighting tirelessly to save her. They stood together on the balcony at the inn of a town they were staying in at the time. Snow fell around them

"_**I'm so glad you're back to normal," he said.**_

**_She nodded and smiled at him. "Yes. Thank you for taking care of me."_**

"_**You knew?"**_

"**_Of course I did. I can always tell when you're around. I get a happy feeling. Even without a soul, I constantly felt that warmth, so I know you were there."_**

HoroHoro looked to his left at Rong as she unknowingly placed her right hand on the armrest – where his was. She was watching the film intently, her left hand in a loose fist and resting on her sternum.

"**_I was scared…Scared that I had lost you…" He took her hand. "You're all I could think about. All I could dream about."_**

"_**Oh Lucian…"**_

"_**Cornelia…"**_

_**They moved toward each other.**_

Quickly, he scanned the theatre. Empty. He looked at her again. She looked even more worked up than before. Smiling with soft eyes, he reached across and used his right hand to gently turn her face toward him. They moved in a synchronized motion with the movie as they leaned toward each other and kissed. He took her into his lap as it intensified.

"Horokeu…" she moaned as he kissed her neck. Her breathing was becoming irregular. "I love you so much…I'm so glad I came here to find you…"

"I know…Me too…" he whispered, his hands beginning to roam. "you have no idea how much I was thinking of you…"

"I think I might…All my dreams were of that night…And how I let you have all of me…"

He kissed her again. "Yes…You're mine…I'm yours…I love you, Rong…and you're mine…"

* * *

Back at the Usui house, all was quiet.

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-RING**

**RING-**

"Oi! You've reached HoroHoro and Pirika. We're not home right now, but leave us a message after the beep and we'll give you a call back – if we feel like it…BEEP. Hehe, sorry. Here's the real thing."

**BEEP**

"It's Ren. Look, even if you two haven't figured things out yet, you have to get back here – NOW. Something must have slipped - Wei Dúo and Wei Tāi are here…and they're **NOT happy**."


	57. The Way of the Wei

I was going to include En and Ran in this, but I couldn't figure out why they would really care that much. The Wei family would only begin serving Ren's daughters (if any at all), so it really doesn't concern them.

**Notes: "Dúotāi" means "abortion" in Chinese.**

**Special thanks to Hikari for her insight on Chinese culture.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Seven: The Way of the Wei**

* * *

HoroHoro looked at the girl to his right as they entered Tao Castle. Rong was clutching his hand as she stared at the ground, her eyes low and blank. He'd never forget the look of horror on her face as they listened to Ren's message. She had been so happy after coming home from the movies, but the news of her parents' arrival had killed that happiness.

"_This is it," she said. "Either they're going to force me to have an abortion or claim the baby for themselves. You may have nothing to worry about." She smiled weakly._

He had tried to reassure her that everything would be okay, that he didn't mind taking care of her, but she had kept shaking her head.

They walked down the entrance hall not speaking. Rong looked like she could cry at any moment.

"_I had finally gotten used to the idea of being a mom…"_

HoroHoro looked forward as the thoughts raced through his mind.

_I'm going to have to step it up. No jokes. I have something to protect now. I won't let either of them down._

A set of large double doors was in front of them, and Rong looked up. Her hand pushed against one of them, opening it, and they walked in.

A man with choppy dark red hair looked at them. He was dressed in light armor of grey and red with the Wei family symbol on his back. Beside him stood his wife, a tall and slender woman with a beautiful face, blonde – almost white – hair, and red and white robes. Ren and Pin-Mei stood to the left of her parents. Li was standing to the right.

The couple stood just past the doors. HoroHoro looked at her face. It was pale. Either she was feeling sick, or the reaction of her parents really did terrify her. He looked at the icy stare of her guardians. They didn't look like people who would tuck their children in at night with a loving kiss on the cheek.

"Rong," the man boomed. "Come here."

Rong swallowed as she gave HoroHoro's hand one last squeeze and made her way over to them. As she stood in front of them, she looked up, her red eyes full of fear.

Out of nowhere, her mother's hand appeared and slapped her across the face, sending her to the floor.

"Rong!" HoroHoro cried. He ran to go help her, but the woman saw him out of the corner of her eye.

"Li, restrain him."

"Yes, mother." She appeared behind him and held him in a full nelson.

"Let me go!" he shouted as he struggled against her.

Even Pin-Mei tried to run to her, but Ren held her back.

"Don't interfere," he said. "I'll step in if she's in danger. Until then, stay back. You'll only cause her more trouble."

Reluctantly, she nodded. She looked on with fear in her eyes. This was the person who had cared for her since she was a toddler. Who had washed her, dressed her, and coaxed her into eating when she refused. Now, when this person needed her, she could do nothing to help.

Rong slowly stood, ignoring the stinging in her cheek. Another hand came and slapped her other cheek, sending her to the ground again. Again, she slowly got up, trying to ignore the pain.

"How dare you…" her mother growled. "Are you trying to set a bad example for your sisters? If their eldest sister won't follow the rules, why should they?"

Rong said nothing.

"Rong," he father said, seemingly attempting to sound reasonable. "Why have you done this? Do you have any idea of the severity of your actions?"

Rong said nothing.

"Speak."

Her mother was seething with anger. "You used to be so obedient. Who are you and what have you done with my daughter?"

Rong's eyes widened in pain. "I'm still here, mother," she whispered.

"My Rong would never disobey the rules. She carried out her duties like a member of the Wei family should. What's happened to you?"

"I'm sorry," her daughter said. "I didn't expect this to happen. I was just as surprised as you are."

Her father was still trying to make sense of what was going on. "It was rape, wasn't it? Just tell us who did this to you, and we'll have him executed. Then we'll 'take care' of the baby, and things can go back to the way they were."

"No…"

"'No' what? Don't worry about that wretched man's life. Rapists don't deserve the same treatment as normal people."

"No…It wasn't rape…and I'm keeping the baby."

He smiled nervously. "Rong, what are you telling us?"

Rong looked him in the eye, suddenly fearless. "About three and a half months ago, I fell in love with someone. I wanted that person to know how I felt about him, so I gave him all of me until there was nothing more I could give him. Because of that, I became pregnant. That is all."

Her parents looked at her, then at each other.

"Tāi…she's ending up like Shan…" her mother whispered. "What are we going to do with her?"

Tāi looked past his daughter and saw the blue-haired boy that was being restrained. "Is that the father?"

Rong stopped herself from looking. "No. He's no one. Just an escort."

"Really?" He looked to his other daughter. "Li, bring him here."

Li did as she was told and threw HoroHoro to the ground in front of her father. Tāi went to his belt and unsheathed a sword that hung there.

"This boy means nothing to you?"

Rong's breathing hitched. She knew denying him was wrong, but she justified that she was trying to save him. If they knew he was the father, he might be susceptible to punishment – even death.

"Absolutely nothing."

HoroHoro looked up at her. He seemed to understand what she was trying to do, but the pain was still present in his eyes. Tāi raised the sword.

"Then you won't mind if he dies, will you?"

Rong's eyes widened as the blade began to fall. Ren's did as well.

_Shit!_ He grabbed his Kwan Dao and began running over. Then he skidded to a halt. The blade had stopped as well.

Rong had dropped to the ground on top of HoroHoro, using her body to protect his head and neck from her father's blade. She was breathing heavily with tears in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Horokeu…I didn't think he would do that…I'm sorry I denied you…I'm sorry…Please forgive me…I love you…I'm sorry…Just please forgive me…"

"It's okay…I know you were trying to protect me," he whispered. "But don't be reckless like that again, alright? You have to protect the baby." He felt her nod lightly.

Tāi sheathed his sword. "At least now we know the truth," he sighed.

"Rong, this boy has given you a child as well as the ability to lie? Why are you associating with someone like this?" Dúo asked.

Rong and HoroHoro stood. She stepped in front of him.

"The only thing he has given me is the ability to know that what I'm doing is right…and I don't care what you think."

Her parents' eyes widened. Tāi studied the boy.

"An Ainu…" he whispered. "You, boy, do you honestly think you're capable of taking care of a child?"

HoroHoro thought for a moment. "Yes. Yes I do. Even if we aren't, the people in my village always band together to help each other. I'm going to take care of her and the baby. I'll put everything I have into them."

"Are you sure?" the Wei head asked.

HoroHoro tensed. "What do you mean?"

"Do you have any idea, the slightest notion of what being a father entails?"

"I…"

"Waking up every two hours to feed the child, listening to their cries knowing you can do nothing to silence them, raising them to act how you want them to, teaching them what is right and what is wrong…dealing with their rebellion," he growled, glancing at Rong. "You're still a child yourself. You don't have what it takes to be a father. Once things get tough, you'll run away and leave her. This is an unwanted pregnancy. You never asked for a child, so why carry on this charade any longer? Just allow the child to die. Having mere children as its parents will only cause it to suffer."

HoroHoro was silent as he stared at the ground. Rong lowered her eyes. The thought of him leaving, the thought of her waking up one day to find the space beside her empty while a baby cried on the far side of the room…it was haunting.

"Yeah, I'm not even eighteen yet, so what? It doesn't change the fact that I have a commitment to someone," her lover said. "Yeah, I'm the reason Rong's pregnant, but as I told her, I don't regret sleeping with her, not in the least. If you want to keep talking shit about our choice, then just keep in mind that we won't be listening."

He clenched his fist harder and his eyes flared.

"And don't you dare call this child unwanted. Unexpected? Yes. Unwanted? No way in hell."

Tāi sighed and looked at the ground, closing his eyes. "I suppose then that we will end up raising the child ourselves. Now Rong, after the child is born, we will come and…"

There was a flash of light. He looked up to see what looked to be almost a shield of ice in front of him. Eyes looked over it at him, full of hatred and malice.

"If you want to get anywhere near them, you're going to have to go through me," HoroHoro said in a low voice.

Rong stared at him. "Horokeu…"

He looked back at her. "This is what a father's supposed to do, right? Protect his kid?" He turned back to her parents. "Sure, I was scared at first. I still am. But I'm staying with her, whether you believe in us or not."

Rong stared a few moments longer before looking at the ground. Her bangs fell to cover her eyes as she walked past him.

"Oi, Rong! What are you doing?"

She didn't reply, only looked up at her father.

"Father, why does it matter to you if I have this child or not?" she asked softly.

He got an uneasy look on his face, as if he himself didn't know. "Well…"

She turned to Dúo. "Mother, if you loved your children, wouldn't you want me to experience that same joy?"

Her mother just stared at her, not saying anything. Rong lowered her head again.

"Shan wanted children. I saw it in her eyes every time she looked at Lady Hua. She even told me once that she envied her. Not in a malicious way, but in a way that said she wished she could have that same happiness as well. To be able to bring a new life into this world and care for it."

"Rong, she knew the rules, as you do. It's forbidden," her mother reasoned.

Her daughter ignored her. "In the weeks before her death, Shan fell in love with one of the guards at Xu-Fan Castle. They had an affair. It was one more reason why you approved of her being killed."

"_Sister! Where are you going?" Rong cried as she ran up to her._

_Shan turned and smiled at her sadly. She was in chains. The guard with her pretended to ignore her so that she could have a few last moments with her sister. She knelt down, tears in her eyes._

"_I'm not coming home tonight," she said._

_Rong looked up at the guard. "But what about Yunxu? Where are you going with him?"_

"_He's taking me on a trip," Shan said after some hesitation. "We're going very far away, and you won't see us for a very long time." She couldn't tell her four year-old sister what was really going on. Instead, she kissed her forehead. "Never fall in love…Just follow Mother and Father's rules and you'll survive."_

_Rong blinked. "Okay…"_

_Shan reached to her belt and removed a sectioned chain. She handed it to her sister. "Take this. I know I wasn't able to spend time with you and teach you how to use it, but I know that you will find some way to fight with it."_

"_Thank you," Rong said solemnly. She had a feeling something wasn't right._

_Shan stood and forced a smile, then waved. "Goodbye, little sister."_

_Rong watched her sister and her lover walk into a steel cell. She couldn't see into it or hear any sounds that came from it. Patiently, she waited for her sister to emerge._

_She never did._

"When you went into the cell, you found not only my sister dead, but Yunxu as well," Rong said. "He was given the job of killing the woman he loved. He could no longer live knowing what a crime he had committed, and took his own life as well. That was the worst sort of punishment you could give two lovers."

She waited for her parents to say something. There was silence.

"Why doesn't that story make you cry, Mother? Knowing that your own daughter was killed, and you could have done something to stop it?"

Dúo looked away from her.

"Don't you miss her?"

"I do…"

Rong clenched her fists. "Don't bullshit me. You don't love me. You didn't love Shan. You don't love Li. Or Yu-lan. Or Geming…"

"Silence, Rong! You're upsetting your mother!" Tāi cried.

"Or Ju. Or Mei. Or Ru…"

"SILENCE!"

"Or Heng. Or Qiao…"

"SILENCE I SAID!"

He slapped her across the face, sending her to the floor once again. Rong stood slowly, a smirk on her face.

"I landed on my back to protect my child," she said. "Would you have done the same, Mother?" Silence. "You have nine children…How many times have you told them you love them?"

"Ch…Children don't need their parents to tell them that! They should already know!" her mother cried, obviously uneasy.

"Maybe, but then why don't I believe that the both of you love me?...I'm getting sick of all this silence. The both of you obviously don't have anything to say."

Her father's face creased with rage. "Rong…if you wish to remain a part of this family, I suggest you bow right now and beg for forgiveness. Your mother and I will not tolerate this insolence any longer!"

"Fine. Disown me."

"Wh-What?"

_Rong reached up into the cabinet and got down a glass, then moved toward the sink to fill it with water. As she turned the faucet on, arms gently wrapped around her midsection. She pretended to ignore it as the glass was filled. When she turned around, he took it from her and placed it on the counter, then kissed her gently. When it ended, he gave her a quick squeeze._

"_I love you," HoroHoro whispered in her ear._

_She blushed as she pushed him away. "What was that for?"_

_He smiled and hugged her again. "'Dunno. Just felt like saying it."_

Rong looked at the ground. "I don't want to be in a family where it's considered wrong to have someone come up to me and hug me and tell me they love me for the sole reason that they 'felt like it.'"

"What _is_ this nonsense?"

Rong closed her eyes. "I grew up raising Lady Pin-Mei on my own. Her father had isolated himself from her. She never received words of love from him. I thought that that was the way it was supposed to be. I never questioned it. I never told Lady Pin-Mei I loved her because I figured that since I thought I was fine without hearing those words, she didn't need to hear them either. But my outlook began to change when I came here ten years ago to be with Milady…"

"_Ren, darling, where are you going?"_

"_Outside." He started speed walking towards the door._

_His mother smiled at him. "Alright, then. Be careful." She bent down and grabbed him, pulling him close to her. He struggled as she planted a kiss on his cheek. "I love you, sweetheart."_

_He slipped from her grasp, his face red. "Yeah, yeah, whatever…"_

_Ran was still smiling as he ran outside._

"As I watched them, I wondered how a mother could tell someone I thought was undeserving of it that they loved them," Rong said looking at Ren. He looked back, understanding the point she was making. "I questioned if I was doing something wrong. I couldn't think of anything. I had done everything my parents told me to. Still, this boy who seemed to disobey his parents without a second thought was told daily that he was loved. It only confused me more last year…"

_Zhang held Pin-Mei's hand as he walked her to her bed. After she had gotten in, he brought the covers up to make sure they were covering her and tucked her in. Then he removed his long coat and set it on his lap as he sat on her bed. She blushed as he gently stroked her hair, smiling down at her. _

"_I hope you enjoyed the New Year's celebration," he said in a soothing voice._

_She nodded. "I did…Thank you for your gifts, Father."_

_Zhang shook his head. "There's no need to be so formal with me."_

"_Alright…Papa…"_

_He smiled. "That's better." He let out a little chuckle as she turned her head away to yawn. "You get tired so easily, it seems."_

"_M-Maybe…"_

_Zhang looked down at her lovingly. "Well, I suppose I'll let you sleep then." He leaned down and gave her a quick peck as he grasped her hand. "Goodnight, Pin-Mei."_

"_Goodnight…Papa." She was unused to this._

"_I love you."_

_She stopped. Her eyes quivered as tears slowly filled them. "Do you…really mean that?"_

_He smiled. "Of course I do. I wouldn't say it if I didn't feel so strongly about it."_

"_But…But Mom…"_

_His eyes lowered, the smile trying to stay in place. "Yes, your mother is gone…but that's all the more reason for me to take care of you. You're her gift to me. She wanted you to live so much that she chose you over herself." He looked at her again. "I'm sorry I neglected you all these years, Pin-Mei. I shouldn't have. You were in pain, just as I was, and I didn't help you, I didn't protect you like a father should."_

_She gasped as a tear fell down his face. 'Men aren't supposed to cry…' she thought._

"_If you just give me the chance, I'll show you how much I love you and care for you. I'll show you how important you are to me, how much you mean to me. I'll make up for all these years. I promise you, I promise!"_

_Pin-Mei looked up at him, then used her thumb to wiped away a few of his tears. "Papa, please don't cry." She smiled. "I love you too."_

"Suddenly…It felt like I was the only one in that house who wasn't loved," Rong said bowing her head. "Ling and Shu's parents would send them letters; 'I love you honey, hope you're doing well. Work hard. Love, Mom and Dad.' I never got any of that. I was told to train, work hard, and protect Lady Pin-Mei. To die protecting her was my destiny." She lifted her head suddenly, tears in her eyes. "And then…"

"_I can't lie, Rong. Not about something like that."_

_Her eyes lowered. "Oh…I understand."_

_She was surprised when he kissed her._

"_I love you," he said, smiling down at her._

_For a moment, she was confused. He had just told her he couldn't lie about love, so why…?_

_As he watched it dawn on her face, he cupped her cheek._

"_I love you," he said again._

_She touched his hand as the tears came again. "I love you," she whispered hoarsely._

"And then…"

"_**I love you, Cornelia Brunel…"**_

"_I love you, Wei Rong…" He continued kissing her as the credits rolled._

"When those words were finally said to me, I cried. I had started to think that I would never hear them. That I would die without being loved." She looked to her left as HoroHoro grasped her hand. "Horokeu alleviated the pain that I was feeling. For the first time, I'm doing something for myself. At the same time, I'm doing something for someone else, too. I'm happy. I don't know when I could last say that and mean it. _I'm happy_. I have a family now, one who needs me more than you do. More than Pin-Mei does. My services are to them now."

Tāi clenched his fist. "Rong! Can you even grasp the volume of the mistake you're making? If you're going to keep this child, the two of you must get married as soon as possible! Are you aware of the amount of shame this could bring our family?"

Rong shook her head. "HoroHoro and I didn't expect this to happen, and I will not take this opportunity to trap him and force him to stay with me."

"He'll run off on you someday, you know that, don't you?" Dúo cried.

Her daughter remained complacent. She and HoroHoro looked at each other, then at the floor. "If that does happen, if it means that he'll find someone else to love him and make him happy, then so be it. All that I would want would be that he remain in the child's life and let them have a father."

"HoroHoro's not that type of person," said Ren. "But yes, if it did happen…"

"She'd stay with us. We would help her," Pin-Mei said smiling.

Tāi furiously turned back to his daughter. "You're Chinese! He's Japanese! It's crossbreeding! The child is going to suffer!"

"The Ainu already have to deal with racism. It's nothing we can't handle," HoroHoro said.

Rong smiled a little bit. "Yeah, plus, I have Shan's whip, and I know how to use it." They both laughed.

"How can you two laugh about something like this?" her parents cried.

"Because," HoroHoro said. "Kicking and screaming didn't help."

"Honestly!"

Rong smirked. "Well, to be perfectly honest, it's because you two are so worked up about it."

"What?"

"Yeah, I mean, most people would be ecstatic to know that they were going to be grandparents. You guys are just spazzing," HoroHoro said with a grin.

Tāi couldn't help stomping his foot. "We could have you drowned! The both of you! Executed! Stoned! Water torture! Something worse!"

Suddenly, a blade was at his chin. He looked to his left to see Ren holding his Kwan Dao at him, a fake smile on his face.

"L-Lord Ren! What is the meaning of this?"

"I believe you've made your point. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like they'll be listening to you. Kids these days…" He sighed. "But if you're going to make such violent threats, I must ask you to leave."

"But-But-!"

"I think you should move quickly. My hand has been known to slip every now and then, and I don't want blood on the floor. It was just cleaned a few days ago."

Tāi gritted his teeth. He threw down Ren's weapon and walked over to his daughter.

Before anyone could react, he pulled back and swiftly punched Rong in the stomach.

She crippled to the ground, clutching the place where she had been hit. Her breathing heaved and staggered as she fell to her knees. HoroHoro stared at her, then at her father.

"You bastard…" he whispered in a low voice. "YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"

With a cry, he charged at the Wei head and tackled him, knocking him to the floor. He relentlessly started giving him all the right and left hooks he could muster. Tāi soon threw him off and stood up. Dúo rushed to her husband.

"Dear, how could you do that? Even if this is against the law, how could you punch your own daughter like that?" she said in a timid voice.

Her husband slapped her. "Don't talk back to me! Now I can see where she gets it from!"

She held her cheek, a few tears in her eyes. "Yes, dear…Forgive me…"

Rong looked up slightly. _But this is the first time Mother has ever gone against anything Father has done…_

The Wei head glared over at her. "You're no daughter of mine. You'd best find a new surname, because it surely is not Wei." He turned to his other daughter. "Come, Li."

She stayed where she was.

"Li, COME."

"But Lord Ren has not dismissed me."

Ren smirked. "You train your daughters to obey the people they serve to the point where they won't even obey their own father. You did this to yourself."

Tāi seethed and then quickly turned, grabbing his wife's wrist and practically dragging her with him. She kept trying to look back at her daughter, but soon was yanked out of sight. Ren turned away, seemingly regretful that his hand hadn't slipped.

HoroHoro had recovered and was gently touching Rong's shoulders. She was coughing nearly uncontrollably.

"Rong, just try to breathe," he said, though he seemed to be having trouble himself.

Rong covered her mouth, and then coughed once more toward the ground. She whimpered.

"What? What is it?" he asked, his voice frantic. Rong lifted her head. He saw it.

A large pool of blood was on the floor.

Too much for just one person.


	58. Suteki da Ne?

**Notes: Nothing really.**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Eight: Suteki da Ne? (Isn't it Wonderful?)**

* * *

Ren walked out into the hall and shut the door. HoroHoro, who had been sitting on a bench, quickly stood, waiting for him to speak.

"Well?"

"She's going to be fine."

"And what about…"

"They don't know yet."

HoroHoro fell back down on the bench. "Come ON!"

"We're doing everything we can," Ren said. "We have 33 doctors, each with 3 different degrees in medicine. If anyone can help her, they can."

A few more hours went by. Finally, the door opened, and a doctor waved Ren in. HoroHoro looked up as Ren came out and beckoned him in. Slowly, he stood and walked into the room. His mind was racing as Rong's bed came into view.

_Please don't tell me…_

The doctor walked over to the right of her bed and gently lifted her wrist. HoroHoro squinted at it. It was black and blue. He looked to her left one. It was the same.

"What happened to her?"

"Maternal instinct," Ren said simply.

"What?"

"She knew what her father was going to do, and, at the last minute, covered her stomach with her arms. That is what he ended up punching. She was still hit hard, hence the blood, but she was able to cushion it. If she hadn't, without a doubt, the fetus would be dead."

Pin-Mei, who had been sitting in a chair next to the bed, looked up. "One would think that despite her skills to read someone, her father, a warrior in his own right, would be the hardest to read," she said. "They don't think the baby's going to die. If she rests, it should be okay."

The Ainu breathed an audible sigh of relief. "Thank God…"

"You'll never guess who called," Ren said as he leaned against the wall.

"Who?"

"Wei Dúo."

"What?"

"She asked how Rong was doing. She actually sounded worried." He looked over at her. "I guess the things that her daughter said got to her." He looked away. "Either way, I'm changing the rules of that family once they come into my services."

Pin-Mei cocked her head. "Can you do that?"

"I can now."

"I'm not really sure if Tāi would allow that…"

HoroHoro rushed over to the bed and kneeled next to it. "Rong! How are you feeling?"

She smiled at him. "I'm okay. My wrists hurt a little, though." Her head turned to the ceiling. "Then again, what do I care? I'm not part of that family anymore." She closed her eyes.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

"I'll take my mother's maiden name; Lao."

"Why your mother's?"

"Because I think I can forgive her. Even though she didn't say it out loud, I know she cares about me, seeing how she reacted to what he did." A faint smile appeared on her face. "It made me…happy."

Ren glanced over at them. "So what are the two of you going to do now?"

Rong and HoroHoro looked at each other. She nodded at him, and he nodded back.

"We're going back to Japan," he said. "She's going to stay with me. We'll break the news to the tribe at some point. We'll have to ease into it."

"Because of the Chinese/Japanese thing?" Pin-Mei asked.

He shook his head. "There are a few Ainu in China, so that's not the real problem. It's just the fact that she's not part of the tribe at all." He held her hand. "But it'll be okay."

The doctor looked at her clipboard. "Still, we want to keep her here for another day or two. We're not one hundred percent sure if the baby is okay. It will be easier to decide if there will be any lasting trauma if she rests here for a few nights. I'm sorry to say, but neither she nor the baby is out of the woods yet."

Rong sadly looked down at herself.

"I'd like you all to leave the room so I can continue testing."

Rong grabbed HoroHoro's wrist, flinching as her own throbbed.

"Please, can he stay? He's the father and…I don't really want to be alone…" She put on her best sad puppy eyes (which weren't very good since it was her first time using them).

The doctor sighed. "Fine, the father can stay, but the rest of you, please leave." Ren and Pin-Mei left, and she sighed once more. "I'll be right back. Don't let her move." HoroHoro nodded and she left.

He looked back to Rong, who had a few silent tears dripping down her face. He looked away for a moment, then turned back, a bright smile on his face.

"Hey, you know-"

"It's okay HoroHoro…I know you're trying to cheer me up…but sometimes…you just need to deal with the sadness instead of running away from it…"

He looked at her again. Her eyes seemed blank, like she was just a shell.

"Rong, I think you should go back to sleep. You're just going to upset yourself."

She shook her head. "Not until I know the baby's going to be okay…"

He moved to hug her. "Rong, you need to calm down…"

"Don't touch me!" she screamed as she shoved him forcefully into the wall. As he hit it, she put her head in her hands and started crying as hard as she possibly could.

He got up, his eyes flaring. "What the hell did you do that for?" he yelled at her. "I'm just trying to help you and you pull this shit on me! What the hell did I do to you, huh? Here I am, just TRYING to be supportive of you, and you push me into a wall! I don't need to be here, you know! I could pretend not to give a shit! I could just leave right now! I could-,"

"Something inside me is **DYING!**" she screamed at him. "You can't possibly understand how I feel!"

He glared at her.

Outside, Ren was leaning against the wall, waiting for the Ainu to emerge. His eyes shot open and he grabbed Pin-Mei's wrist.

"Come on," he said sternly.

"Wait, what?"

He threw the door open and ran in. His eyes widened.

Rong's head was turned to the right, her cheek red. HoroHoro was in front of her, staring at his hand in utter horror.

"What the hell just happened here?" Ren said in a low voice.

But he knew full well what had happened. He looked at Rong. She wasn't responding in the least. Before Pin-Mei could stop him, he grabbed his friend by the collar and slammed him against the wall. His eyes were filled to the brim with rage.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he said slowly, his voice low.

HoroHoro just stared back at him. "I…I…"

"I'm not someone for chivalry…But considering what she is to you, I would have expected more. You say you love her. You made love to her, taking something from her that she'll never get back. You got her pregnant. You told her you'd stay with her and take care of her and protect her. She put her body on top of yours to protect you. She was **DISOWNED BY HER PARENTS** because of this pregnancy, and now, because of them, she might lose this child, the source of all the agony she's been experiencing the past few months."

HoroHoro's eyes went wide. "A…Agony?" Ren's grip on him got slightly tighter.

"That's right – agony. Do you know how many days before you Pin-Mei and I knew she was pregnant? Four at most. She has been suffering in silence for **three long months** all by herself, probably scared to death because she knew what her family would do if they knew about this. She was probably afraid my family would throw her out since she wouldn't be able to do her 'job'. She's sacrificed everything for this baby, and for you to get irritated because to pressure is getting to her is unacceptable. This is when you should be there for her the most! Put up or shut up. Just know this…" He grabbed the boy's left wrist and pretended to examine it as he spoke, his eyes still like daggers. "You touch her again, I'll make damn sure there won't be a third." He looked at him to make sure he knew what sort of punishment he was referring to. "Got it?"

HoroHoro nodded, his eyes small. "Yeah…Got it…"

Ren dropped him and left the room.

Pin-Mei stared at them and then went over to Rong and laid her back down on the bed. She took a small heating pad and turned it on to a low level and put it under pillow, hoping the warmth would help her fall asleep. Next, she picked up the overturned chair and turned it right-side-up. It fell over again. One of the legs was broken. She found another one by the window and set it up next to the bed. She had wanted to put the HoroHoro in the chair, but found that she couldn't lift him; he was still petrified by Ren's threats. Instead, she found a blanket and covered him with it. She took off his headband and put in on the nightstand.

After surveying the room and deciding that everything was in order, she turned to leave. But she turned around again, her eyes falling on Rong. A look of intense longing was in them. She shook her head quickly to get out of the trance, then left.

Ren was waiting for her outside. "You didn't need to do all that stuff, you know. You're not their mother."

She looked at the ground, a small smile on her face. "Maybe…But Rong was like a mother to me, so when I'm able to help her, I do. I want to be able to repay her for taking care of me."

He studied her for a moment before walking away. "Come on."

She stared after him, then ran to catch up with him. His arms were folded across his chest, and she removed one and held it. He looked over at her.

"Remember-"

"I know…No children until I'm twenty-one…"

* * *

That night, when everyone else had gone to bed, Pin-Mei opened her eyes and carefully looked to her right. Ren was sleeping soundlessly beside her. She smiled. No matter how many times she saw him like this, however few, she couldn't get over how cute and innocent he looked. She ran her hand through his bangs before kissing her right index and middle fingers and lightly touching his forehead with them. Then she slipped off the bed and out of the room.

She ran down the halls as quietly as she could, stopping at each corner to make sure no one was coming. Eventually, she reached the medical wing. Being even more cautious, she found Rong's room and went in.

HoroHoro had moved to the chair and was now peacefully asleep, holding her hand. Pin-Mei smiled, then carefully walked over to the patient laying in the bed. She slowly pulled the blankets down so that her stomach was exposed. After rubbing her hands together to make sure they were warm, she slipped them under the medical tunic Rong was wearing and rested them on the battered womb.

"Please work…" she whispered as her hands began to glow.

Seconds went by. Then a minute. Then five. Then ten. Twenty. Thirty. Forty-Five. After nearly an hour had passed, Pin-Mei, her furyoku nearly depleted, stood and started to make her way back to her room. Her steps were wobbly and she had to hold on to the wall to keep herself from falling.

"Maybe I should have stopped sooner…" she whispered to herself, unable to have an inner monologue. She stopped at a corner and thought for a moment. "I don't think I'm going to make it back to the room…I still have four more wings to go…or is it three? Darn…I'll never make it back…I'm too tired to even know where I am…"

With that, her legs buckled and she headed for the ground. When she didn't hit the floor, she glanced up to see Ren looking down at her.

"Brat."

He picked her up and began carrying her back to their room.

"Next time you're going to go out, at least tell me. It's a little unnerving to wake up and find you gone for so long. And be smarter about using your furyoku."

She looked down. "Sorry…I was just trying to help…"

He sighed. "I know. Still, it wouldn't hurt to let me know what you're up to."

"Sorry…" She fell silent, deep in thought. Her eyes closed as she spoke. "Will you…train me? Make me a better shaman? So our children will be strong?"

Ren looked down at her curiously. "If that's what you want."

"I do…Hey…"

"What?"

"Were you worried about me?"

He was silent for a moment.

"A little."

She giggled lightly and leaned her head against his chest. "Thanks."

* * *

The next morning, at 7am, HoroHoro burst into their room.

"You guys won't believe this!" he cried. "The doctor just said that the baby's perfectly fine, like nothing ever happened! Come on!" He ran out of the room.

Ren sat up and looked at Pin-Mei. "No credit, just the way you like it, right?"

"Yeah," she whispered, her eyes still closed.

"You're still exhausted, aren't you?"

"Yeah…That's why I want you to train me…"

"I will. Just don't expect me to go easy on you."

She smiled. "I know."

* * *

**Six months later… November 3, 2002**

* * *

Pin-Mei woke up and hurriedly threw her clothes on. She went into a drawer in her room and opened her pillbox, taking one of the small capsules and popping it into her mouth. Nervously, she counted the remaining ones.

_I know I shouldn't be taking them this frequently, but I want to make sure **it** doesn't happen. I…don't want him to be mad at me… It's okay, I'll just tell grandma and grandpa to send some more. _

She quickly shoved the pillbox in the drawer and shut it as Ren opened the door. He looked at her curiously.

"Didn't you take it last week?"

She smiled and shook her head. "Time flies, doesn't it?" _Yes, and the week before that…_

He shrugged. "Well, HoroHoro just called. Rong's in labor, so if you want to see her, let's go. It's a long flight."

"Okay!" she cried and bolted out the door.

When they arrived, Rong was sitting up in her bed holding a baby in her arms. She looked tired, but she was smiling. HoroHoro was sitting in a chair beside the bed, his eyes transfixed on the newborn and a smile on his face. Pin-Mei looked at the baby in amazement. It was looking around the room with large dark brown eyes. Wisps of black and blue hair sat on its head. She dumbly walked over and sat in the chair on the opposite side of the bed.

"C-Can I…?"

Rong nodded and put the infant in her arms. Pin-Mei marveled at it. "She's so cute…What's her name?"

"Usui Xue," Rong said. "Even though we're not married or anything." She looked at HoroHoro and smiled. He tried to act cool and looked away, blushing.

"Will you?" Ren asked.

"Who knows?" the mother said shrugging. "Like I said…I'm not going to trap him just because of Xue." HoroHoro looked at the ground.

"Xue…Snow…" Pin-Mei whispered. She smiled. "You gave her a Chinese name."

"Of course," Rong said as she smiled back at her. "She should remember where some of her heritage is, after all."

"I wanted to name her Cori, but my ideas don't matter," HoroHoro said, snapping his head away angrily.

"Only when they suck," Rong grumbled.

"It did NOT suck! Cori is an awesome name!"

"Giving your daughter a name derived from your spirit is NOT awesome."

As the two went back and forth, Ren looked over at his fiancée. She was looking at Xue with those eyes of longing he had seen a few times before. She usually gave him those eyes, but now, the baby was getting them.

"_I really want twins! And I want one to be a boy, and I'll name him after you!"_

"Isn't she cute, Ren?"

She was looking up at him, beaming. Xue was giggling as well.

"Yeah…"

"_I don't want you pregnant before you're twenty-one, understand?"_

_She looked down sadly. Then she nodded. "I understand."_

* * *

**Three years later…**

* * *

Rong waved at him as he walked across the yard toward them. "Glad you could make it."

"Yeah…Well…With Pin-Mei not feeling well, I figured that I should at least make an appearance."

"Such a shame. Xue was looking forward to seeing her. It's her birthday after all."

Ren looked away, uneasy. "Yeah…Well…"

"Hey…What is-"

"Mama! Xue wants cake!" the three year-old cried as she ran up to them. She saw Ren and smiled. "Hi Uncle Ren!" she cried lifting her hand.

Ren looked down at her. Two long pieces of hair were on each side of her face, and the rest was boyishly short like her mother's; the top blue, the underside black.

"Hey," he said unenthusiastically. He looked to Rong. "Where's the halfwit?"

Rong's smile faded. "Out." She looked down. "Can we talk?"

"I suppose."

She led him inside, and, after busying Xue with some toys, sat next to him on the couch.

"I get the feeling this isn't something happy," Ren said.

Rong shook her head as she folded her hands and rested her forehead on them. "I think Horokeu's going to leave soon."

"What?"

She looked up. "He's been working lately…a lot more than usual. He's hardly home anymore. I keep telling myself that he's at work…but…sometimes he doesn't come home until two in the morning. I don't even think his work is open that late." Her eyes were quickly filling up with tears. "And then…last week…"

_RING RING_

_Rong walked over and picked up the phone. "Hello, Usui residence?"_

"_Is Horokeu there?"_

_Rong's eyes widened. A woman's voice._

"_No…No, he's not."_

"_Oh, I'll just call back later then." _

_-CLICK-_

"…So you think he's cheating on you."

She nodded. "If a man called asking for Pin-Mei, and she had been out late at night, what would you think?"

He lowered his head. "I suppose you have a point." He raised it again. "Still, you don't have any solid proof. It could all just be a big misunderstanding. I've known him a long time; he wouldn't do something like that. I promise you."

She wouldn't look at him. "Hey, Ren…"

"What?"

"We're friends, right?"

He blinked and looked at her. He hadn't thought about it before. "I guess."

She leaned against him. "Can I stay like this for a few minutes?"

He looked down at the floor between his legs. "If you honestly feel like you need to. But remember, I have a fiancée back home, and I'll willingly burn in hell before I betray her trust."

He felt Rong smile against his shoulder. "Good. Be sure to tell her I said hi."

His heart dropped. "Sure."

* * *

A few days later, Rong was tidying up the apartment she and her family had moved into when Xue called for her. She walked over to where she was, holding a teddy bear that she had yet to put away. Her daughter was standing near an open window. The cold night air blew through it, and the moon shone into the room.

"What is it, sweetheart?" Rong asked with a smile as she knelt down in front of the small girl.

Xue smiled at her mother. "Daddy was talking about Mommy last night."

Rong froze. Children were observant. They never held things back. If HoroHoro had said anything about leaving around Xue, the little girl would have no trouble repeating the words to her like a parrot. She forced a nervous smile.

"Oh? And what did he say?"

Xue kept smiling. "Daddy said that he really likes Mommy. Really REALLY likes her. He said that he likes it when Mommy smiles. It makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside."

Rong stared at her.

"He said that Mommy is the most beautifullest girl in the world. He said that he's reeeaaal lucky to have Mommy. He said that Mommy makes him feel nice."

Rong blushed slightly.

"Daddy said that he loves sleeping with Mommy. He likes when Mommy holds him like this." Xue hugged herself. "He said that Mommy's good at kissing too."

The blush deepened. "Did…Did he say anything else?"

Xue nodded. "Daddy said that Mommy makes him really happy. Really really REALLY happy. Daddy loves you, Mommy. And…"

"Daddy wants to spend the rest of his life with Mommy."

Rong jumped to her feet and looked to the window, dropping the toy. HoroHoro was squatting on the windowsill, a small box in his hand. A ring nestled inside it.

"Horokeu? What are you doing? I thought you went to work!" she cried.

He smiled at her. "Not tonight. If I'm working at all tonight, it's going to be for you."

She watched him jump into the room. He handed his daughter a doll and sent her away with a pat on the back.

"Thanks, squirt."

She giggled and ran into her room. He looked at Rong, who was close to tears.

"You mean…All those things she said…You told her to…?"

He nodded, his smile still on his face. "Yup." He got close to her. "I meant every word of it, too."

He knelt down in front of her.

"Marry me?"

She stared down at him.

"Sorry it took a while. I wanted to be able to get you a decent ring."

Her eyes widened. "That's why you were working so much…"

He chuckled. "You got it."

"But…But that woman on the phone…"

He raised his eyebrows. "Woman on the phone…Oh damn."

"What?"

"There was a female worker at the jeweler's. I told them not to have her call here if they needed to talk to me because I knew you would get worried. Sorry…I didn't mean for that to happen."

_Everything I was worried about…for nothing…_

"So, Rong, will you marry me?"

She started crying. "You jerk!" she cried. "Do you have any idea how scared I was?"

He cocked his head. "Scared?"

"Yeah, scared! Be…Between you staying out at night…and…and that woman…I thought you were going to leave me for some sexy Japanese girl!" She looked away and tried to hide her eyes.

"Rong,"

She choked a little bit. "What?"

"Don't you remember what Xue said?" He smiled at her again to show her he meant what he was about to say. "You're the most beautifullest girl in the world to me."

"Be…Beautifullest isn't a word, you stupid dummy…" she whispered, but the blush was deep red on her face.

"Rong,"

"What?" She looked at him, but he was suddenly standing in front of her.

"I'll ask all night if I have to. Will you marry me?"

As she looked at him, the months they had spent together, which had turned into years, flashed through her mind. The smiles, the laughter, the punches, the screaming, the crying…

_How in the world can I deny myself of the man who taught me how to love? Who's been such a great father to our daughter? …Who's made me so happy?_

"Of course I will," she whispered.

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Geez, that took long enough. Hehe. Doesn't matter."

HoroHoro took the ring out and slipped it on her finger. "It looks nice on you."

She looked at it. "Thanks…"

He embraced her. "Let's put Xue to bed, and then we can 'go to sleep'."

She smirked. "Sounds like a plan."

* * *

**One month later…**

* * *

"Yo! Ren! Pin-Mei! We're here!" HoroHoro called as they entered. Rong was carrying Xue in her arms as they walked down the halls.

They had practically invited themselves over. The couple had wanted to share the news of their engagement, and found it unfit to say over the phone. For some reason, Ren had seemed against it. But he soon came into view from down the hall. Again, Pin-Mei wasn't with him.

Rong blinked. "Is she still sleeping or something?" she asked the Tao heir.

He looked at the ground. "Well…you see…"

She placed Xue on the ground and patted her. "Go find Auntie Pin-Mei, Xue!"

The girl saluted, accepting her mission. "Okay, Mommy!" She turned around in the direction in which her search would begin. "Ready or not, Auntie Pin-Mei, here I come!"

She began sprinting across the room. As she passed Ren, he scooped her up and sent her back to her parents.

"Sorry, Pin-Mei doesn't feel like playing right now."

The couple eyed him, confused. "What's wrong with her?" Rong asked.

Ren turned his head to the side, still eyeing the ground. "She's…not doing well…"

"What do you mean?" HoroHoro inquired.

Ren's eyes became sadder. After a few moments, he looked at them, an expression of despondency in his eyes, one that the Tao Ren they knew would never have.

"Pin-Mei…she…tried to kill herself last night."


	59. broken

I used "Broken" by Seether featuring Amy Lee of Evanescence to write this. I know, another duet. I just can't deprive myself of them. xD

**Notes: I just want you all to know, suicide is NOT something I take lightly. It's very serious. It's something that so many people have to deal with that it's horrifying. I hope that none of you ever have to experience those types of feelings. With that said...**

**Trigger warning for depression/suicidal actions.**

**I'll just re-establish the ages at this point: Ren – 19; Pin-Mei – 18; Rong – 22; HoroHoro – 20; Li – 20; It is currently mid-December 2005. **

**Underage swearing. (what?)**

**Sex talk.**

**************Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Fifty-Nine: …broken…**

* * *

_The night was dark and rainy. Only black could be seen out the windows as Ren looked around the castle for Pin-Mei. She had been staying in her own room as of late, but she wasn't there when he went to see her. Finally, he went to the room he should have searched first – his own. _

_He opened the door, allowing light from the hall to seep in and give the room some illumination. She was standing in the middle of it, her back turned to him._

"_There you are. I was looking for you." His voice was gentle. It had been for months now._

_She turned to look at him, tears streaming down her face. He squinted at her. She was holding something in her hands. _

"_Pin-Mei? What is that?"_

_Some light reflected off of it. His eyes widened._

_It was his Kwan Dao._

"_I'm sorry Lord Ren…Please don't hate me…" she whispered. "I don't want to cause you any more trouble…I'm sorry I'm not of any use to you anymore…that I can't do the thing that I was chosen to do…" She seemed to try to smile, but couldn't. Those muscles had weakened months ago. "Goodbye…"_

_She turned and started bringing the blade closer to her neck. Her eyes closed as she held it and swung it back._

"**_NO!"_**

_He ran over to her and grabbed the hilt of his weapon. She refused to let go, holding onto the pole as tightly as she could. Realizing he couldn't be gentle if he wanted to separate her from the tool that almost caused her death, he shut his eyes and put his foot on her chest in the valley between her breasts and pushed her away. She tumbled backwards, falling to the floor and rolling into a shelf of porcelain. _

"_Oh shit…"_

_He watched helplessly as it fell on top of her, the small figurines shattering on the floor._

"_Pin-Mei's turtledove was on that shelf…"_

_He looked at the Kwan Dao and, not knowing what else to do, thrust it out the window. It hadn't been open, so it smashed the panes of glass as it fell to the ground outside. Cold wind and rain rushed into the room, but he ignored it. Relieved that she couldn't hurt herself with it anymore, he ran over and threw the shelf off of her._

"_Pin-Mei…Oh God…"_

_Ren knelt down and started helping her up. Her face was bleeding where the glass had cut her. He looked down and saw the small porcelain bird laying near her. Its right wing had broken off._

"_Why…Why did you stop me?" she sobbed. "I want to die…"_

_He stared at her. This wasn't the cheerful Pin-Mei he knew and loved. She had been stolen, replaced by an impostor. Where was his Pin-Mei? The one who could smile and laugh about everything, even when things weren't going her way? The one who cared so much about her friends? The one who told him she loved him whenever there was a moment of silence between them?_

_The sound of moving porcelain brought him back. He looked down and saw her holding a large, sharp piece over wrist. He watched as she drove it down into her skin, the blood instantly spilling out onto the carpet. She took it out, holding it in position to bring it down a second time. Ren swatted it away from her._

"_What are you doing?" he screamed at her. "How could you do something so stupid…so selfish…SO FUCKING RETARDED?"_

"_I'M NO GOOD TO YOU ANYMORE!" she screamed back. "JUST LET ME GO AND BE WITH MY PARENTS!"_

_His eyes widened and he struck her in the neck, knocking her out, her body going limp in his arms._

_He stared at her before his eyes welled up with tears, but he tried to keep them in. He failed.  
_

"_This is…just a nightmare…Pin-Mei wouldn't do this…She wouldn't want to leave…want to leave me here…by…my…self…" He felt like screaming to let out his angst, but he knew he had to find another way to calm down. He breathed deeply and stroked her hair, his cheek pressed against the side of her head. "Please…Come back to me, Pin-Mei…Be your happy self again…Please…"_

_His parents burst into his room._

"_We heard smashing," his father said._

"_And screaming…" Ran added hesitantly._

_They looked around the room at the shattered porcelain, the broken window, and the blood coming from their future daughter-in-law._

"_Ren…What happened here?"_

_Ren looked at his father in horror, then at the still body in his lap._

"_Pin-Mei…She…"_

* * *

"WHAT?" Rong cried. "You're kidding! Lying! Pin-Mei would never do something like that! It was just a nightmare, like you said! There's no way in hell…"

Ren shook his head. "No matter how many times I tried to wake myself up, the shelf was still empty, and the servants were still replacing the window."

"Wow…" HoroHoro whispered. "What the hell happened to her?"

Ren bowed his head. "It's…It's my fault. I kept telling her that she couldn't get pregnant before she was twenty-one. I pushed her. I made her afraid to even get pregnant. She started taking her hormone-negation pills twice a month. Then every week. Then three times a week. Eventually, she was taking them every single day. Because of that…" He clutched the knees of his pants.

"No…" Rong whispered. "You can't mean…"

"The doctor said she's permanently infertile," he whispered. He covered his face. "If I hadn't been so hard on her…I wouldn't have driven her to this…Her dream is ruined because of me…"

HoroHoro looked at them as if they were stupid. "So just have her stop taking the pills. She'll go back to normal eventually, right?"

Ren shook his head. "She realized there was something wrong after she ran out of them one day. Her grandparents said it would take three months to grow enough herbs to accommodate for how much she was taking per month. During those three months…she didn't menstruate once. That was six months ago. She still hasn't. At first, she was a little excited, thinking it meant that she _had_ become pregnant, but every test she took came out negative. It devastated her when she realized what was going on. She won't eat, won't sleep, and hardly ever leaves her bed. She's withering away. I would go see her, but she would just cry, apologizing to me for not being able to have children. She feels like it was her sole purpose in our relationship, like that was why we were set up in the first place; she would give my family children to continue on. I don't think Zhang put that idea in her head. I think she may have just assumed that it was her duty as the female in the relationship to have children."

"I don't get why she's so dead set on that, though," HoroHoro said. "I mean, I guess it's important, but it seems like she's making that more important than you loving her. I mean seriously—,"

"Shut up, Japan boy. Mommy and Daddy are talking," Rong said putting her hand over his nose and mouth.

"Mommy, Daddy's face matches his hair!" Xue said giggling. Her mother sighed and let go of him.

"China's different, HoHo," she said turning away. "In many families, the job of the wife is to give birth to a strong, healthy son to continue the family. Girls aren't wanted as much. There's a 'one child only' rule in effect because of overpopulation. Each family can only have one child. So the parents always want a boy. Families like the Wei and Tao family can get away with having more than one because they live away from other people, so it doesn't really matter how many children they have. But to Pin-Mei…not being able to have children…she feels like without that ability, there's no reason for Ren to keep her around."

"Shit…" the Ainu whispered looking down.

"Shit…" Xue repeated as she mimicked her father.

"HOROKEU!" Rong roared. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING TEACHING OUR DAUGHTER LANGUAGE LIKE THAT?"

He panicked and looked around for a way out.

"R-Rong! I didn't mean to! She'll probably forget it in five minutes!"

"Shit shit shit shit…" the toddler said in a singsong voice. "Uncle Ren, wanna sing the Shit Song with me? I just made it up!" She beamed.

Ren sighed and looked at the floor. "Not right now, Xue. Some other time."

Rong looked back at the HoroHoro, eyes flaring. "YOU DUMMY!" She grabbed his arm and whipped him across the room. Then she stomped over to him and grabbed him by the collar. "You aren't going to stop until she knows all of them, are you? First it was 'fuck', now it's 'shit'. What's next?"

"Bitch."

"That better not have been directed at me!"

Ren sighed. "Will you guys shut up and get back over here? If you're going to fight then just go home. I have enough of my plate." He looked at Xue. "Are they always like this?"

She nodded. "Only it's usually at night."

He looked at her questionably. "At night?"

"Yeah-huh. I'll be in my bed, and I can hear them yelling in their room."

"How utterly horrible."

Rong strolled up to them dragging her fiancé. "She's in her room, right? I'm going to talk to her…"

Ren shook his head. "She's not there."

"Where is she, then? Your room?"

He looked away. "The bottom floor – the underground."

"The…bottom…floor…?" she whispered, her eyes widening. "WHY THE HELL DID YOU LOCK HER UP?"

"It was En. He decided that she should stay in there until she 'snaps out of it.' It's so she doesn't hurt herself."

"The hell…" She walked over and slapped him. "How. Dare. You." she said looking him in the eye. "How the hell could you allow your fiancée to be chained up like that? Don't you love her? Or are you falling out of love because she's going through a depression?"

"Of course I love her!" Ren cried. "I had no idea what else to do! I didn't want her to hurt herself! Even if she has to live down there, at least she'll be safe and far away from anything that could cut her!"

There was silence. Rong was pacing, nodding her head angrily. She stopped in front of Ren.

"When you were locked up down there, what had you done to deserve it?"

He looked at her, a little confused. "I was going against my father…Why?"

"Is that the same as trying to commit suicide?"

"What?"

"You were doing something you knew would get you in trouble. Are you on the same level as Pin-Mei? Did she not save you from that hell hole even after you tried to rape her? And you can't even do the same when she's in trouble?"

"What…?"

"Aokun, cover Xue's ears."

He nodded and did as she said.

She turned back to Ren and slapped him again, obviously irritated. "If someone feels so low, so crappy, so shitty that they feel the need to end their life, how do you think it makes them feel to be chained up like an animal in a dark, cold dungeon without a comfortable bed to sleep in? Without anyone to hold their hand? TO BE ALL ALONE?"

His eyes widened. He clasped his right hand over his mouth. "Shit…what have I done…"

Rong smiled at him. "Get some food for her. I've dealt with her 'I'm not going to eat' tantrums before. I'll get her to do it. Promise. Now, let's go." She looked around. "Call Li."

He looked at her quizzically. "Why don't you?"

"I'm no longer her sister. She won't listen to me."

"Oh…What do you want her for?"

"I want her to watch Xue while we go see Pin-Mei."

Li was called, and Xue was handed over.

"Hey Auntie Li! I haven't seen you in a real long time!" the toddler cried hugging her leg.

The Wei guard looked down at her. "I'm not your Aunt," she said robotically.

Xue stared at her for a few moments. "Silly Auntie!" she cried.

Rong looked at Li with a anguished expression on her face, obviously missing the sister she had once been so close to. When a servant brought some food for them to bring to Pin-Mei, she quickly took it and left the room. Ren and HoroHoro followed.

"Which cell is she in?" she asked.

Ren paused. "She's in the Ryuyou no Ma."

She glared at him as if she was about to tell him off, but he was staring at the ground with those despondent eyes again as he walked. She knew that smacking him around more wouldn't change anything. He already knew he had done the wrong thing. No…not that…he knew that he should have done more to protect her.

"Move aside," Ren said to the kyonshii blocking the entrance. They obeyed him and opened the door.

Rong was only a little surprised when he sprinted into the room toward the dragon shaped chair on the far wall. Pin-Mei was chained to it, her arms locked over her head. He ran and knelt on it before her. She was clad in a black satin nightgown with long flowy sleeves. Her body was thin, her skin chalk white. She was also taller from when Rong had seen her last, now about 5'3".

Slowly, he touched the bottom of her chin and gently tilted it up so he could look at her face, which had been hidden by her hair, which now reached her knees. Her eyes were faded, as if there was no longer a soul.

"Pin-Mei…" He quickly clutched her and held her close to him. "I'm so sorry…I never should have allowed this to happen…I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry," she mumbled.

He pulled back and looked at her. New tears were falling from her eyes.

"I made you mad, right? That's why you hit me last night. It's alright…I deserved it. I'm sorry that I displease you, Lord Ren. I'll try harder... Just please don't hate me."

He shook his head. "I'm not mad, don't worry," he whispered stroking her cheek. "And I've told you before, you don't have to call me Lord Ren. Just Ren is fine." She wouldn't even look at him. When he kissed her, it was like when she died; her lips wouldn't mold to fit his. Grief stricken, he leaned in so his forehead was touching hers. "Can't you understand that I love you regardless of what you can and can't do?" She didn't reply.

"_Lord_ Ren?" Rong repeated as she came up behind him. "When did she start calling you that?"

He looked at her sadly. "A few months ago. It's the only thing she calls me."

She sighed. "Oh Pin-Mei…" She turned to Ren. "May I?"

He nodded slowly and got up as she took his place. She set the plate down between her and her former mistress.

"Good afternoon, Milady. It's chow time. Let's see what we have here…" She picked up the plate and pretended to smell it. "Wow! The cooks have really outdone themselves this time! Check it out! It's all your favorites!"

Pin-Mei didn't even look up. Ren looked over the former maid servant's shoulder doubtfully.

"Are you sure this is going to work?"

"Of course," she replied. "I know Pin-Mei like I know Xue. She's like my first child. I know how to get to her." She took some chopsticks out and picked up a small piece of meat with them. With a careful, steady hand, she brought it up to the girl's mouth, the tender cut of food pushing against her lips.

When they didn't part, Rong leaned up to Pin-Mei's ear and began humming a hauntingly beautiful tune into it. Ren watched in amazement as her eyes opened a little more and she looked up at the ceiling. When Rong resumed her position and again tried to feed her the meat, she accepted it slowly, chewed it, and then swallowed.

Rong smiled and stroked her cheek. "There's a good girl. I bet Ren's proud of you."

He tensed.

"He…He is?"

"Of course. You're being such a good girl after all," Rong said in a soothing voice.

"I'm a good girl…"

"That's right. You'll be an even better girl if you eat everything on this plate."

"I will…?"

"Oh yes. So let's get going."

"O…Okay…"

Twenty minutes later, the plate was empty.

"Geez, Rong! How'd you do that?" HoroHoro cried.

She looked at the scion. "I actually have Ren to thank for that little trick."

He looked surprised. "Me?"

She nodded. "When she came over here the first time, she found a music box in your mother's room. She loved the melody, but it would sometimes make her fall asleep." She smiled. "Whenever she was bothering you, you would get the music box and open it so the music would play and she would fall asleep.

"When we got back home, she refused to eat unless we took her to your house again. It was my job to make sure she ate, so I was worried that I wouldn't fulfill my duty. Then, I started absentmindedly humming the melody from the music box, and she suddenly ate whatever I gave her. Remember that."

He nodded. Rong walked over to him and took out a vial. He blinked at it. "You still wear your Wei armor?"

She froze, then chuckled. "Force of habit I suppose…Anyway, drink this and then transfer it to Pin-Mei through her mouth. I won't be able to give it to her otherwise." She handed it to him.

Ren studied it. "What is this going to do?"

"Make her go to sleep."

"You…sure it's safe…?"

"Oh course it is. Ren, she needs it. Look at her. I can't even tell when the last time she slept was. If you don't give this to her, she may die of exhaustion."

The moment the word "die" met his ears, he chugged the liquid and walked over to his fiancée. He gently opened her mouth and then covered it with his. As it flowed from his mouth into hers, she swallowed it obediently. When he pulled away, her half-lidded eyes were looking up at him with childlike innocence.

"Lord Ren…Am…Am I a good girl?" she asked softly.

He looked at her with pained eyes, then tried to smile as he leaned over and cupped her cheek. "Of course you are. That's just one of the many reasons why I love you."

He kissed her softly. When he looked at her again, he saw that, ever so slightly, the corners of her mouth were trying to turn up. She closed her eyes and her head fell as she drifted off to sleep.

"Your voice is so gentle with her," Rong observed.

"I have to be," he said. "If I raise my voice even a little, she thinks she did something unforgivable and starts crying."

She studied his face. "You're so tired."

"It's hard to sleep when the person you love is so unhappy."

She put her hand on his shoulder, shaking it a little. "Then be her strength, Ren. You have the ability to make her happy. I've seen it before, and I want to see it again. Work your magic."

"The magic's run out."

"Luckily, I have plenty of Ethers."

Ren smirked and looked at the miracle worker. "Now what?"

"First off, get the key and unlock her. Being in this damp and dirty place will only make her sick and her mood worse. Then…" She stopped as she watched Ren stroll over to where the chains were bolted into the stone wall and began pulling on them. "What are you doing?"

"En is the one with the key," he grunted out as he concentrated on separating the metal and stone from each other. "He won't give it to me if I ask, so I'm improvising."

"Ren, that's impossible, even for you," Rong tried to reason with him. "You're just going to hurt yourself. At least _try_ asking your father for the key before you go off like this."

"I've done it once for her, and I'll do it again, Goddammit!" he yelled. But it wasn't budging.

_Last time I broke chains, the wall was plaster. Stone is so much different…so much harder. No, I'm going to do this._

But as he tried even harder, the bolts still wouldn't budge.

_Why can't I do this? I'm so much stronger now than I was then…_

Adrenaline. The sense of urgency to save her wasn't there. That time, she was about to be raped. Now, she was in no real, immediate danger.

_I have to remember how I felt then…_

"_LIKE HELL I'M GOING TO LET THAT HAPPEN!"_

His eyes shot open as he began pulling on the chains once again. HoroHoro watched as a vein in his arm looked about ready to burst.

"Ren! Stop it! You're going to hurt yourself!"

"SHUT UP! I'M GOING TO DO THIS!"

A few moments later, the bolts snapped and the first cuff fell from her wrist. Not stopping for an instant, he went to the other chain and began pulling on it just as hard, if not harder, than he did the first one. Sweat dripped down his forehead as his gritted his teeth. His arm sockets felt as if they would give way at any moment, but he wouldn't give up.

Finally, the plaque holding the chain to the wall broke away, freeing his fiancée from her shackles. Rong caught her as she fell forward, no longer being held up by the iron confines.

Ren staggered and fell into the chair. He withstood the pain in his arms for a few more moments as he reached out to Rong, wanting her to lay Pin-Mei on his lap. She did, placing the girl's head on his chest as if he were sleeping next to her. He smiled weakly as he tried to breathe normally again.

"Pin-Mei…"

Rong smiled for a moment, then let it fade.

"If she's staying in bed all the time, how is she being bathed?"

Ren breathed deeply a few times before he answered her. "Servants come in every other day and take her to be washed."

"When was the last time?"

"She should have one today."

"Perfect. You're going to be the one bathing her."

"Oh, okay…" he said as he looked sleeping girl beside him. Then he snapped his head up. "WAIT, WHAT? I can't do that! Do you know what everyone here would say if they knew I did that?"

Rong folded her arms. "Stop acting like you've never seen her naked before."

"I…I haven't."

She looked at him as if to ask him if he was serious. "How dumb do you think we are? You two had sex the night we watched the Shaman Fight. Don't deny it. I even helped her seduce you, so I know all about it." She sighed. "While we're on the subject, when was the last time you-,"

"I don't see how that's any of your business."

"AKA, a really long time ago," HoroHoro said nodding.

She cocked her eyebrow. "What makes you Dr. Love all of a sudden?"

He folded his arms and grinned. "I'm a love machine. We know everything."

She tossed her head away from him. "Of course you do…"

"Do not question my knowledge, mortal!"

She motioned to her belt. "I'll use the whip."

He cowered. "Yes 'um. Shutting up."

"Good boy. You get a treat when we go home."

Ren stared at him. _Is this relationship even **remotely** healthy?_

"Six months," she said.

He stared at her. "What?"

"That's how long it's been."

His eyes were wide. "H-How did you know that?"

She laughed. "It was a guess. You only confirmed it."

He looked away from her sheepishly.

"Holy shit! Dude! How are you surviving?" the blue boy exclaimed. He cried into his arm. "It's so sad!"

Rong started detaching the whip. He whimpered.

"Behave."

He looked at the ground. "Yes, dear."

She cleared her throat. "Anyway, yes, I want you to wash her. As weird as it may sound, it can be viewed as a bonding experience of sorts. She has to trust you to be gentle with her body. After that…see if you can get her to…"

"BOW CHICKA WOW WOW!"

She punched him. "SHUT UP!"

He grabbed his head in pain. "Wasn't that what you meant?"

She suddenly softened. "Oh yeah. It was."

Ren stared at her. "You want me to force her to have sex with me after all this shit she's been through?"

Rong shook her head. "You misunderstand me, Ren. I mean it as a way for you to tell her that you love her no matter if she can have children or not. I think it would be the ultimate way of showing her. …Shan once told me that it's an act that's meant to bring two people that love each other even closer together. Both of you need that. By no means am I asking you to force her. Make some advances and see if she lets you. If not, then don't. You just have to make sure she knows that you're doing it because of what it means emotionally.

"For now, take her up to your room and let her sleep on her side with you behind her. She won't be instantly cured after just some food and a little sleep. She's still going to be weak and sad. What she needs, more than ever, is you by her side. Put your arm around her. Let it be the thing she wakes up to. After that, give her the bath. Have some of the maid servants dry her hair and such, then bring her back to your room and see what happens."

He looked away. "I don't like this…It feels cruel to ask that of her."

"Then don't do it. I can't make you listen to me; all I can do is offer you advice. I just…hate…seeing you two like this…" She covered her face with her hand.

HoroHoro leaned over, trying to look at her eyes. "Rong?"

She finally removed it, revealing a few tears. "Sorry…It's just…It's not fair. Nothing is ever perfect for long with them, and it's not fair. Something always happens, they always get torn apart somehow…What couple deserves that? Why can't they just get their happy ending like we did?" She wiped her tears away with her palm, sighing. "Oh God…I'm hopeless."

Ren looked to Pin-Mei, who was still fast asleep. "I'll just see what happens. But I feel better since you guys have been helping. After last night, I was so fucked up that I could barely think. Now it's not as cloudy. …Thanks…"

Rong laughed. "'You guys'? This idiot didn't do a single thing!" she said pointing at the man beside her.

"Well, EXCUSE ME for not contributing to this therapy session!"

She sighed sarcastically. "So much for Dr. Love." She looked over at Ren to see that he was standing up, Pin-Mei in his arms. "HoHo, we're leaving."

"What? We just got here!"

She pulled him close to her. "They need time to work this out. That can't happen easily if we're here. Besides…" She looked at the floor. "I want to go see my mother. I want her to meet Xue."

After a few moments, he nodded. "Alright."

They walked with him upstairs to his bedroom.

"Good luck, Ren," Rong whispered. "Contact us if you need anything, alright?"

He nodded slowly. "Yeah."

HoroHoro looked a little conflicted. Finally, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around his friend. Ren seemed to be trying not to blush.

"H-Hey! What are you doing?"

The hugger remained calm, trying to give him something he probably hadn't received in months. "Take care of yourself." He patted him on the back twice before letting go. "See ya." He waved and they left.

As the couple walked down the hall, Rong let out a small laugh.

"We're getting married soon and we're still so loyal to the people we loved first."

HoroHoro shook his head. "I don't see it like that. We're all friends. We're just helping each other out."

She looked at him serenely and held his hand. "You're right."

"For once."

They retrieved Xue and left.

* * *

Back in his room, Ren was changing bandages on Pin-Mei's wrist. He looked at the deep wound she had inflicted on herself.

_This is definitely going to scar…You're so stupid, Pin-Mei._

He quickly put some ointment on it and wrapped it up. Partially because he wanted it to heal. Partially because he couldn't stand to look at it.

He laid her down on the bed and got behind her in a spoon position. As he wrapped his arm around her, he couldn't help but notice how cold her body was. On that night three years ago, when they were finally together again, her body had become much warmer, almost as if he made her that way, like it meant that she was happy. But now, it was back to being cold.

They had been on top of the covers, but he moved her under them. It was December; the air was cold enough without her body adding to it. He thought better of it and joined her, reassuming his position.

"I love you," he whispered in her ear, knowing he would get no reply. As he held her tighter, about to fall asleep, a thought came to his mind.

His heart broke.

His breathing hitched.

His eyes closed.

He fell asleep.

_I can't remember the last time she said "I love you"._


	60. Lilium

**Notes: I'm not mentioning it in this chapter, but Ren did not end up taking Rong's advice.**

**In rehab centers, caretakers will often engage the patients in activities at least once a day, even if they are almost 19, like Pin-Mei.**

**I never mentioned this before, but the shower is a rather large one. Like a bath house one, except just for one person. Oops. I've been deceiving you all this time! XD**

**I guess this is a good time to warn you that there's a shower scene O.o;;**

**************Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty: Lilium**

* * *

_Ren opened the door slowly and peered inside. Pin-Mei was in bed, curled up in a ball._

_"Why did you go to bed so early?" he asked in a rather commanding voice. Then he smirked. "Did you want me to come after you?"_

_He rid himself of his shirt and tossed it to the floor. Then he sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over his fiancee's thinning body. His hands crept up her back and rubbed her shoulders before carefully turning her body over._

_His eyes widened as he saw the tears rolling down her cheeks._

_"Pin-Mei? What's wrong?"_

_"I...I..." she whispered, her eyes brimming with sorrow. She wiped them away as if she were embarrassed by them. "Just...not tonight...I don't want to..."_

_Of course, he was slightly disappointed, but it wasn't in his nature to force such an issue. There was always tomorrow, wasn't there?_

_...Of course...there are no such guarantees in life that tomorrow won't be worse than the day before it._**  
**

* * *

Ren woke up and looked at the calendar. December. The past year had gone by so slowly that had been almost painful. Soon after Rong and HoroHoro left, Ran had brought in a woman who she claimed could help Pin-Mei get better. He was thankful, but to him, talking could only do so much. There was no way she would be cured just by that.

That's what he thought anyway.

* * *

His twentieth birthday had been a solemn reminder of how much she had changed. She only made a brief appearance, handing him a small box with a new turtledove inside. She didn't smile, only nodded when he thanked her. He had tried to make a bigger deal of it than it actually was, hoping that the praise would help improve her self-esteem. She had merely turned away and walked up the stairs again.

"Will you at least come to bed with me?"

She only ignored him and vanished into the darkened hallways of the medical wing. It was crushing to have her not even give him any sort of acknowledgment, but Ren calmly went to bed by himself.

Just as he was about to fall asleep, cold hands touched his back. He quickly turned to see her laying next to him, seemingly nervous.

"Pin-Mei..."

"She...She said that I should sleep beside you like you asked because it's your birthday, Lord Ren...She said it would be a good present..."

He smiled at her. "It is, you have no idea." He had been sleeping by himself for the past five months.

"But I have one more present I want."

"What...What is it?"

"Just call me Ren, alright?"

"If it will please you..."

But the next day, things went back to "normal"; Pin-Mei and her doctor, Jiuhuo, shut themselves up in the medical wing, only letting servants in when it was time to eat.

"There's something that bothers me a little, Pin-Mei," Jiuhuo said as they were eating dinner one brisk February night.

Pin-Mei didn't look at her. "What?"

"Why do you feel the need to call your fiancé 'Lord'?"

She stopped. "I don't know. I just do."

"Yes, but why? Why can't you just call him by his given name?"

"Because he's older than me."

"I'm told that you didn't do it a year ago."

"...It doesn't matter. He doesn't care. He likes being in control anyway."

"Pin-Mei...it makes him really uncomfortable when you call him that."

Her patient stared at her, a twinge of anger in her eyes. "What, did he tell you that?"

"He did, actually..."

She got visibly angry. "I'll call him whatever I want to!"

"Pin-Mei, you can't do things that you know people don't like," Jiuhuo reasoned with her. "He's trying his best for you, telling you he loves you all the time when you never say it to him." She sighed. "Valentine's day is coming up soon, and for your activity today we're going to practice making chocolate, and you're going to give it to him."

"But...I've never made it before..."

"That's why it's called 'practice', Pin-Mei."

"But I don't..."

"Are you saying you don't love him?"

"N-No! I didn't say that!"

"Then why are you so hesitant to give him a gift?"

"...Because he always looks sad afterwards...I don't like it..."

Jiuhuo couldn't help but smile. Progress. Ever since she had been here, Pin-Mei had isolated herself from Ren. She had never said why. Jiuhuo had asked once, and Pin-Mei had ignored the question. She knew no good would come from forcing an answer out of her, so she didn't ask again.

Pin-Mei looked at her right wrist, which was clad in a dark scar. "Are you sure he doesn't hate me for what I've put him through?"

"He asks about you three times a day."

"I don't believe you."

"Fine, don't, but you're not helping yourself by being so negative." She drummed her fingers on the table. "Do you _want_ him to hate you?"

Pin-Mei seemed phased by the question. "No...I just wouldn't blame him if he did."

Jiuhuo looked at her sympathetically. "Sweetheart, he knows that you're sick, and he knows that the real you is in there somewhere. But if you keep pushing him away, eventually he's going to leave."

Pin-Mei let out a short whimper as she snapped her head over to look at her.

"Well, it would seem as though you don't want that."

She shook her head, slowly at first, as if she couldn't picture it happening. But as her mind began playing a cruel trick on her, the scenario became more visible, and she shook it faster.

Jiuhuo sat back in her chair "It's been nearly two months, and we've barely made any headway. Tonight is actually the greatest leap of progress we've had, and that's not a good thing. Things aren't going to get better unless you _want_ them to get better."

"I do..."

The doctor sighed once more, then leaned forward and looked Pin-Mei in the eye. "You don't show it. You refuse to talk to me when I ask you why you're crying, you hardly ever leave this room, you hide in the closet when Ren comes to the door..."

"Stop it! You don't understand!" she screamed covering her head.

"Then _make_ me understand."

Pin-Mei slowly looked up at her. _Ren said the same thing the night before the engagement banquet..._ She started crying again.

Jiuhuo was about to sigh again when Pin-Mei interrupted her.

"I...can't do anything for him..." she whispered. "I...I'm inferior...He's the one who does everything...He always has been."

The woman stared at her. Outside, she was blank, but inside she was jumping for joy. Finally, after two long months, she may finally be able to get the story behind the girl's sudden depression.

"What do you mean? What has he done?"

"EVERYTHING!" she screamed. "It's always him! I never do anything anymore except bring him milk and hand him towels! The servants won't even let me cook for him anymore! Whenever I've achieved something, he's behind it!"

She was given a quizzical look and a tilted head. "You're saying your achievements are his?"

Pin-Mei nodded furiously. "When I was able to stand up to Suo, it was because he _gave_ me that strength. It was the reason why I was able to withstand having my hair pulled and remain faithful to him! When I killed her, it was because he showed up and guided me; without him, I would have lost! When we found out Rong was pregnant, Ren was the one who took care of her and reassured her and helped her make the right decision. I barely did anything! He defended Rong when her boyfriend got irritated at her...There are just so many things over the past three years that have been piling up...

"And then...and then...the one thing that I can do...that he can't...is taken away from me. Now I can't do anything. I thought that I could at least do the thing that a wife is supposed to do and give him a son to continue the family...But I can't...my usefulness is gone...Now I'm just a trophy."

When she looked up, Jiuhuo was staring at her own crossed legs, deep in thought. "Do you know what it means to be a trophy wife?"

"Of...Of course I do...It's a wife who can't do anything and just stands there looking pretty."

She sighed and shook her head. "Bzzt. Wrong. A trophy wife is a very young woman who is married to an affluent, older man, and often is not his first wife. And when I say older, I mean in their forties, fifties or sixties."

"_I'm not a forty year-old coot!"_

Pin-Mei gave a small smirk, then quickly hid it.

"Are you saying that Ren is an old man?"

"No, of course not. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't do anything."

The shrink leaned forward. "Okay, say that's true. You're useless. Why would Ren keep you around?"

Pin-Mei thought for a moment. "Because I have sex with him."

Jiuhuo raised her eyebrows. "Alright. Again, let's assume that's correct. Now, in the past eight months, how many times have you had sex with him?"

Pin-Mei blinked a few times and looked at the floor. She finally drooped her head so her face couldn't be seen and held up her hand. Her fingers were in the shape of a zero.

"Well, now, I think that means that your theory's wrong." She pretended to think. "Hmm...now, why in the world would he keep you around?" The girl looked away from her. "Gosh, it couldn't be because he loves you like he's been telling you for the past five years, could it?" Her patient was shrinking away from her. She looked at her watch. "Let's ask him, shall we?"

No more than two seconds later, there was a knock at the door. Pin-Mei turned her head toward it curiously as her psychiatrist stood and walked over to the door. As she watched Jiuhuo open it, her eyes widened.

"Ah, Master Ren. On time as always."

He seemed to ignore her greeting. "How's she doing?"

"Well..." she looked over her shoulder. "Why don't you ask her yourself?"

Ren looked into the room as a slam was heard. "Where is she?"

"The closet most likely."

He blinked and slowly made his way to the closet in the back corner of the room, then he stopped. He sighed. "I won't force her to come talk to me if she doesn't want to." He turned and started walking out of the room.

Jiuhuo grinned. "Maybe you should give up, Lord Ren," she said. "It's been two months, and not a bit of progress. I bet you can find another fiancée easily. Why don't you just leave Pin-Mei and move on? Why even keep her here?"

Ren turned and glared at her. "Obviously you've never been in love before," he said in a low voice. "If you had, you would know that when you love someone, you don't give up on them so easily."

"Yes, but I just don't see how you can love someone who hides from you like she's scared of you. You aren't able to carry on a normal relationship with her. Again, what's the use of keeping her around?"

"She's not a pet, like a dog or cat. I don't keep her around because I have to. I do it because I want to. I'm the only family she has left, if you can even call it that. And how would me kicking her out improve her condition, hm?"

She looked at the ceiling mischievously. "I suppose you're right, Master Ren."

"Damn right I am." He went to leave. She turned to him.

"When _will_ you give up?"

He mumbled and walked out, slamming the door. Jiuhuo seemed to giggle a little as Pin-Mei emerged from her hiding place.

"Wh-What did he say?"

"'Never'" She sighed. "Adorable, really." When she looked over at Pin-Mei, she was wiping her eyes. "Hm? Something the matter?"

Pin-Mei shook her head quickly. "Let's just do the activity..."

Jiuhuo smiled. "Of course. We have plenty of time to practice."

* * *

**September 1, 2006**

* * *

"_H-Here..."_

_Ren looked down and took a small box wrapped in pink and gold from her hands. He carefully pulled the ribbon at the top and opened it. Inside were a few heart shaped chocolates. He looked at them, then at her._

"_Did you make these?" She nodded slowly. He smiled. "Thank you." She leaned her forehead over and he kissed it. _

_That night, she followed him to his room, and, to his surprise, got into bed with him. "As a present," she reasoned. The improvement was slow, but it was there nonetheless._

Ever since that day, the memory had begun gracing his dreams, giving him hope that "His Pin-Mei" would be returning soon. But again, when February 15th came, she went back to her room in the medical wing, isolating herself once again.

When White Day arrived, he gave her his present and the corners of her mouth turned up a little more noticeably. When she thanked him, he heard a little more emotion in her voice. By the end of May, she had given him a small wave when he came to the door, no longer retreating in shame. Little by little, her smile was returning, now at half-mast.

But one morning…

"Master Ren! Master Ren!"

Ren woke up to his shoulder being frantically shaken. He groggily opened his eyes and looked over it. Jiuhuo was looking back at him, worry apparent on her face.

"I'm sorry to wake you up so early, but Pin-Mei is gone!"

His eyes shot wide open and he sat up. "What do you mean, gone?"

The doctor played with her hands. "I went to go wake her up, and when I went to her room, her bed was empty."

Ren jumped out of his bed and ran to throw some pants on.

"I'm so sorry for my incompetence, Master Ren. I shouldn't have let my guard down. I'll accept any punishment you wish to give me." She turned away as he removed his silk pajama pants and traded them for his regular black ones.

"Don't worry about it," he said flatly.

Still, she grimly looked at the floor. Since Pin-Mei had seemed to be overcoming her depression, Jiuhuo had given her a small amount of freedom; allowing her to sleep alone in her room and not constantly looking over her shoulder. Now, Pin-Mei had taken advantage of that freedom and escaped. If anything happened to her, it would be her caretaker's fault.

She looked up as Ren speed walked past her. "I'll go with you!" she cried, trying to be of use.

"No!" he said sternly. "It'll be quicker for me to do this by myself. Go back to her room and wait there in case she comes back." He vanished, leaving a still-guilty Jiuhuo to stare after him.

He ran from room to room frantically. For some, he couldn't even justify why he was looking there at all. Once all the hiding spots in the castle had been exhausted, he ran outside. He discarded his training area, the armory, and the small wooded area. He knew where to go. As his feet touched the sand, he looked out over the ocean, quickly scanning it until he saw her.

Pin-Mei was standing up to her hips in the water, doing nothing but staring out into the distance. He breathed deeply as looked at her, trying to figure out her reason for coming here.

"Pin-Mei," he said rather loudly.

She seemed to jump as she turned to look at him. A small smile crept onto her face and she waved at him gracefully. He ran down and stood at the water's edge, staring at her. She slowly stretched her arms out in front of her, as if beckoning him to come to her.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked, slightly annoyed, but relieved at the same time.

She just smiled. "I knew that you'd come and find me if I did."

He blinked a few times and then looked angry. "Why didn't you just tell Jiuhuo or somebody that you wanted to see me? I was running around the whole damn castle looking for you! Don't do this again!"

Her smile fell, and her arms lowered slightly. Her eyes quivered and she broke down crying, covering her face with her hands. Ren suddenly felt guilty. After all those months of using a gentle voice, his anger had broken through. He slowly waded into the water and wrapped his arms around her. She struggled a little, then gave in. He sighed into her neck.

"I'm sorry I got mad. I was just worried."

"I...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." she whispered. "I'm sorry Ren, please don't hate me."

"It's okay, don't wo-"

He stopped and his eyes grew wide. He grabbed her shoulders and stared at her.

"What...did you just call me?"

She wiped her eyes and looked up at him. "Ren...?" She suddenly looked afraid. "I only called you that because Jiuhuo wanted me to! I'll call you Lord Ren again if you want me to!"

He shook his head. "No. 'Ren' is just perfect." He smiled at her for a moment, then turned guide her back to shore. His arm was yanked down, and he looked back to see that she had fallen into the water.

"Are you okay?"

She looked up at him innocently. "Will you carry me?"

It took him a few moments to realize it, but she was quite fine. It was just an excuse for him to touch her. He nodded and picked her up, then started walking back to the castle.

When they got back, Jiuhuo ran up to them. "Where was she?" she asked in an exasperated voice.

"The beach," Ren replied.

"What? Why would you go there?"

Pin-Mei's eyes sparkled. "It was one of the first places we went together, and where one of the first nice things he did for me happened."

"Whenever she runs away, that's where she goes most of the time." He chuckled lightly to himself. "I should have gone there from the start."

Pin-Mei sneezed. The other two looked at her.

"Pin-Mei…how long were you out in the water?" Ren asked.

She looked up, then shook her head. "I don't know the exact time, but it was still dark out."

He groaned. "That was at least two hours ago. You're going to get sick."

"…Oops."

They went inside and Pin-Mei was warmed up and put into bed. After she had drifted off to sleep, Jiuhuo took Ren into another room and sat down. She seemed to be quite pleased with the situation.

"What are you smiling about?" asked Ren, who had by now put a shirt on.

"This morning could be seen as another instance that progress is being made."

"How so?"

"Think about it. She used to hide from you, but now she's pulled a stunt like this in order to get your attention, as if she were a child. While the feeling is immature at this point, she may be well on her way to recovery. The Lamictal and the Budeprion seem to be doing their jobs. Her mood is a little more stable, and she's talking more; more willing to open up."

A small smile slowly appeared. "Good." It faded. "But you never told me why she was like this in the first place. What did this to her?"

The psychiatrist crossed her legs tilted her head. "You did."

Horror flashed on his face. "What do you mean, me?"

She shook her head. "Sorry, that was a little too blunt. What I meant was that she developed anxiety because she felt that she could do nothing for you. Infertility was just the straw that broke the camel's back. After that, she felt ashamed, and that's why she hid. She felt as if she couldn't show her face around you."

"So why did that change?"

"I basically told her that if she wasn't going to try, I wasn't going to either. I can't help her succeed if she doesn't want it. It motivated her. If she keeps going like this, she'll be "cured" for the most part in the not too distant future."

"You used finger quotes…"

She sighed and looked at her feet for a few moments. "There's just no guarantee that she won't relapse or that her body may get used to the medicine and will cease to have any effect on her. On the flip side, there's a chance that, yes, she may be completely cured someday, even to the point where we can wean her off of the medication. Only time will tell."

He just nodded.

* * *

**December 10, 2006**

* * *

Ren took his eyes away from the calendar and instead stared at the ceiling. It would do him no good to dwell on how long it had been since Pin-Mei had given him a full, bright smile. He got out and threw some clothes on, then headed down to the weight room.

For the past two weeks, Pin-Mei had isolated herself. Although Jiuhuo didn't say it, in his mind, it was clear that it was the relapse in full effect. She had been so close to being her old self again…

He sat at the machine Pin-Mei had bought for him for his nineteenth birthday, still lost in thought. She had slapped the catalog down in front of him and demanded that he pick one, saying that she was just curious, nothing would come out of it. Of course, she had pushed him into the weight room the moment he had woken up and proudly shown off her present to him. She had been so pleased with herself, as if she was expecting a pat on the head for the wonderful trick she had performed.

After he had worked out for about ninety minutes, he tossed his clothes on the floor and went into the shower. He stood under the water, his head drooping towards the tiled floor.

Despite the fact that Valentine's Day was more than two months away, he found himself thinking of a present. He needed something big, something that would bring a smile to her face. He found himself lost in the dilemma of the aristocratic; being so affluent that there was little she didn't already have.

Except a child.

That was the one thing she wanted that money couldn't buy. True, he could let her adopt one, or arrange to have a surrogate mother, but it wouldn't be the same. She wanted the experience, the excitement of being pregnant herself. That was almost as important as being able to raise the child.

He knew that thinking about it would make it no less unattainable, so he quickly tried to distract himself by coming up with other ideas, which were poor in quantity and quality.

_Present…I need a present…_

As he tried to think of a suitable gift, he thought he heard the door to the shower room open, then close. He looked up for a moment, listened, then went back to thinking, reasoning that he had imagined the sound.

The small sound of walking in puddles reached his ears moments later. Before he could react, small arms wrapped around him from behind, hands touching his chest.

"Sorry…Next time I decide to take a year-and-a-half-long vacation, I'll get your approval first."

At first, all he could do was stare at the floor. Then he reached up and held one of her hands.

"Yeah…You're in a lot of trouble for doing that without even telling me," he said quietly.

She giggled. "You can punish me for that later."

"Oh I will, believe me."

He took the hand he was holding and swung her around so that she was standing in front of him. He was slightly taken aback as he realized that she was wearing no more than he was, except for her long hair that was now matted against her body. She was smiling up at him, not showing a hint of embarrassment at her appearance. He tensed as she reached up and wiped his eyes.

"Don't cry, Ren. I won't go away again, I promise."

He turned away from her. "I'm not crying. We're in the shower and the water's dripping down my face. Men my age don't cry."

She laughed and tilted her head. "If you say so."

"I **DO** say so."

His head was turned by her small hands, and she leaned up to kiss him. She pulled away and looked deep into his yellow eyes.

"Thanks for waiting for me."

He was desperately trying to keep his cheeks from turning pink. "Yeah…Well…What else would I do?"

He grinned at her and then gently half-pushed-half-lowered her onto the floor. She stared up at him with wide eyes as he leaned over her.

"R-Ren…I don't think I…"

He shook his head. "No, I know. I just want to make sure **you** know…" He grasped her left hand, which was next to her head. "As long as you want children, I'll keep trying to make that happen. It may seem like I can't do anything, but I'll try my damn hardest for you so you can get what you want.

"I told you before that you giving birth to an heir isn't important to me in the least. But having children is important to you, so it's important to me too." He kissed her. "And that's the truth."

She was looking up at him as if he had just said he had a cure for cancer. As he brought his left hand up to cover her right, she glanced over and saw his engagement band. She threw his other hand away and moved his ring slightly so the skin under it was uncovered.

Ren looked at her quizzically. "What are you doing?"

Pin-Mei stared at the skin. It was slightly paler than the rest of his finger.

"You…wore your ring the whole time…"

"Of course I did."

_Even after all I put him through…_

She released his hand and then wrapped her arms around him and pulled him down on top of her.

"Thank you Ren…I love you," she whispered.

The words swept over him, sending tingles throughout his body. He hadn't heard them in so long…They were like a breath of fresh air to him.

"I love you too."

After their shower and spending the day together for the first time in a year and a half, they retreated to Ren's bedroom when it was dark.

As promised, Pin-Mei was punished for her absence.

However, Ren quickly made the pain go away.

* * *

**March 14, 2007**

* * *

The last three months had been passionate ones. It was similar to when they had been reunited five years before. Since their first night together, Ren became protective of her once again, sensitive to anyone or anything he felt was a threat to her.

They now sat on their bed, holding hands. Tonight was the night that they would address Ren's family and tell them that they had set a date for their wedding.

"…I'm nervous."

"Don't be. It's not like they're going to say no."

"I guess…"

"Well, let's go." He stood and began walking out of the room. "You look a little pale. It's a good thing I asked the chefs to make your favorites tonight. I think the food will do you some good."

She nodded, but didn't say anything. They walked down the hall in silence, her following him in a single file line. Before she noticed it, Ren stopped.

"Why are you being so quiet?" He turned to face her as she ran into him. His elbows swung and stabbed into her right breast.

Pin-Mei let out a small yelp and turned away, frantically rubbing it as if she had just hit her funny bone. "Ow…Ow…Ow…Ow…Ow…"

Ren walked over to her and watched her try to nurse her chest back to health. "Are you okay?"

She nodded. He took her left hand and began guiding her down the hall again. She made an effort to talk more, trying to prepare herself for what she had to say.

"So um…what are we having?"

"I already told you, zhajiang mian, xiao long bao, zongzi, and niúròu miàn – Your favorites, remember? I was even able to convince them to make Suzhou-style snow-skin mooncakes with strawberry ice cream in the center. How could you forget? I just told you three minutes ago."

Her face went red. "Oh yeah, sorry!" Then she tried to look smart. "Heyyy, did you know that niúròu miàn was created by the Hui people of a Chinese Muslim group during the Tang Dynasty?"

"Yes…I was the one who told you that."

"Oh…I was um…just making sure you were paying attention, and I guess you are! Darn, there's no fooling you, is there? You're just too smart for me!"

He glanced back at her with a concerned look on his face. _She must really be sick._

As they reached the dining hall, Ren was about to lead her in, but she held him back.

He looked back at her. "What is it? You okay?"

She hesitated, then nodded. "Ren…"

"Yes?"

"Ren…If…If I tell you something, will you promise not to be mad?"

He looked at he suspiciously, but nodded. "Yeah, sure. Why would I be mad?"

She took a deep breath. "Ren…" She opened her mouth, but then opted to pull him down so she could whisper in his ear.

As she spoke, his eyes widened. Pin-Mei's voice left his ear, and she looked at him, trying to gauge his reaction. He stared at her, his eyes still wide.

"Are…Are you mad…?"

He softened, his eyes returning to their normal size. He smiled at her and hugged her.

"Not in the least. I couldn't be happier." He kissed her. "That's wonderful Pin-Mei." His voice was airy as he was still trying to digest her words. "That's wonderful…"

She smiled back at him with tears in her eyes. "I'm so happy, Ren…"

"I know you are," he said as he stroked her hair. "Now we have one more thing to tell them."

She nodded and they went into the dining hall.

* * *

As dinner came to a close, Ren cleared his throat.

"Father, Mother, Zhen, Jun…Pin-Mei and I decided that we're going to get married this year…on the eighth of October."

A dull roar of cheers and congratulatory phrases filled the room as the servants walked by. Li just nodded her head.

Ren looked at Pin-Mei, whose cheeks were a brilliant red. He clutched her hand and squeezed it.

"And we have one more piece of news also…"


	61. Simple Love

This chapter is dedicated in loving memory of my beloved puppy Riza, who I had to put to sleep on the morning of March 16, 2007 due to seizures. Yes, it's the second dog in the course of six months. Yes, it was my decision to put her down. I miss her, but in my mind, a mother thinks of her children's pain before her own. Riza was like a daughter to me, so I chose her pain over mine. Now I know, all too late, that life is precious, and you never know when the ones you love most are going to leave. If I had known her time was near, I would have done so many things differently. I would have cuddled more, spent less time on the computer and more time with her. We have one dog left, my sister's. My mom rushed out and bought me a puppy, Reira, though I felt it unfair to seemingly replace someone who was like a child to me. I'll give her the same love and affection that I gave Riza, though she won't be able to replace my little girl. Being a mother is a draining, tragic, joyful, yet emotionally daunting task…I highly recommend it.

**Notes: The wedding customs are going to be tweaked so that I can work with them more easily. But I kept much of them in place.**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Shaman King. If you haven't figured that out by now, I weep for you. I also don't own Jay Chou, whose lyrics appear in this chapter.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-One: Simple Love**

* * *

**March 23, 2007**

* * *

"Ren…Ren…"

He opened his eyes as Pin-Mei's choked whispers met his ears. He turned over to look at her. "What is it?"

She whimpered. Her eyes were red with tears, which were falling down her face with wild abandon.

He gave her quizzical look. "What?" Then he looked past her at the mattress. His heart stopped as he sprang up and stared at the sheets she was sitting on.

They were covered in blood.

"Oh my God…"

He looked back at his fiancée as she let out a horrible howl and covered her face with her hands. As his attention shifted back to the blood-soaked bed, he tried to make sense of it all. How could this have happened? What went wrong? He had been taking such good care of her, protecting her and the baby…So why…?

"I'm…I'm such…a…horrible…mom…" he heard her choke out. He turned to her and placed his left hand on her back.

"Hey, don't say stupid things. There's nothing you could have done that would have stopped this."

"It's because I had that piece of cake…I know it is…"

"What?" He wrapped his arms around her. "That's just stupid. One piece of cake wouldn't do this. It's not your fault."

"Yes it is! I MUST have done something wrong!" she screamed.

Ren forced her head onto his shoulder and held it there. "You did everything you could…It's cruel that this happened…but it should just make you even more determined to be a mother. We'll just keep trying, alright?"

"But what if I can't get pregnant again? What if the baby died because I'm still infertile? What if it never happens again?" She was still hysterical.

Before he could speak, the door opened and Ran peeked in, dressed in her morning robes.

"What's going on in…" She looked down at the dried pool of blood on the bed. "Oh no…don't tell me…"

Ren nodded slowly and looked at Pin-Mei. "Miscarriage."

His mother looked at them sympathetically, then walked over to Ren's side of the bed and sat down next to them. She gently rubbed Pin-Mei's shoulder.

"I know it hurts," she said softly. "I know how excited you were. But you need to realize that things like this do happen. Life is cruel, and it isn't always going to deal you a fair hand. What's happened is unfortunate, but you need to find the strength to try again. If being a mother is something you truly want, that is."

"It is!" Pin-Mei sobbed.

Ran smiled. "Then all you can do is try again."

Ren mimicked his mother as he felt Pin-Mei do the same against his shoulder. It faded slightly. "What are we going to tell En?"

"We're not."

"What?"

"Ren, you know that your father would only make this into a bigger ordeal than it already is, and I don't think Pin-Mei needs that."

He gave her a slightly exasperated look. "So then what are we supposed to do?"

Despite her son's glare, Ran remained calm. "After Pin-Mei's next cycle is over, try to conceive again. It will give her body time to heal. If you can do it within the next few weeks, then En won't know the difference." She smiled at them. "So don't lose hope."

Pin-Mei looked up at her and smiled. "Okay." She looked behind her. "Sorry about the sheets."

"I hated those sheets," Ren grumbled.

* * *

**October 7, 2007**

* * *

"Okay, Pin-Mei it's time for your cleansing bath."

"I'm coming!"

"Hey, hey! Slow down! You'll fall and hurt yourself!" Rong grabbed her arm and stopped her. She sighed. "You have to be more careful."

"Oh…Sorry…I wasn't thinking."

"Damn right you weren't. Now come on."

She slowly lowered Pin-Mei into the heated water and some servants dumped a bucket of water over her head. She spit some of the water out.

"Pin-Mei, come on. Be a little more mature than that."

"I didn't want to swallow it!"

"Well, be more discreet next time."

"Okay…I will…"

Rong sighed, then smiled. "It's hard to believe that tomorrow's the big day. It seems like only yesterday that I was the one bathing and dressing you. And now you're all grown up…"

Pin-Mei cocked her head at her. "Are you going to cry?"

Rong quickly turned away from her. "Of course not. I never cry."

Pin-Mei smiled. "Of course."

"Finish your bath quickly. You don't want to get all pruney, do you?"

As Pin-Mei watched her walk away, she realized that part of this must be painful for her. Despite the fact that her duties as a maidservant had ceased years ago, to Rong, caring for Pin-Mei would always be her task. True, she had a daughter to take care of, but it was caring for the bride-to-be that had prepared her for it.

"Milady, it's time to get out. We have to start the hair-combing ceremony," one of the servants said to her.

"Alright." She was wrapped in thin silk robe and a few of the servants helped her get out of the water.

* * *

"Why the hell do we need this special bed anyway?"

"Ren, it is one of the customs, and therefore must be obeyed."

"It's not like it's going to be our first time."

"It doesn't matter."

"I'm not sleeping in it."

"Fine. But it would be unfortunate to have the bride sleep here by herself."

"…I hate tradition."

Ren and En stood around a large bed in the center of his room, known as the bridal bed. It was supposed to be installed by a 'good luck' man or woman, but Ren still failed to see the point of such a thing. They were supposed to scatter fruit around it and have small children run around and preferably on top of the bed as an omen of fertility – something he deemed quite unnecessary at this point.

HoroHoro and Yoh stared at the bed.

"So what's the point of this 'bridal bed' again?" the Ainu asked.

Ren sighed. "Something about fertility or whatever. Apparently if some children come in and mess up the sheets, Pin-Mei will have a lot of sons."

"Well, it's tradition isn't it?" Yoh said smiling. "Why not just do it?"

"Because it's a waste of time."

The Japanese boys looked at each other and grinned.

"I think I know why he's irritated," HoroHoro said in a fake whisper. "It's because he hasn't seen Pin-Mei in two weeks, so he hasn't been getting any."

They laughed, but suddenly a blade was at his nose. He looked up to see Ren holding his Kwan Dao, anger burning in his eyes.

"If you're going to talk about me, don't do it in a place where I can easily get a weapon and kill you."

His friends fell silent, nodding their heads furiously until he retracted the weapon. He sighed.

"Wow! Fruit!"

The three men looked behind them as Xue, now almost five years old, skipped into the room. She looked around at the bits of fruit and sweets on the bed before her, her eyes wide and bright. She licked her lips subtly, obviously wanting to make the treats her own.

"Uncle Ren! Uncle Ren! Can Xue have some? Xue wants some!" she cried pointing at her prey.

With a blank look on his face, he picked up the small girl by her underarms. "As a matter of fact, yes. We need a kid to mess up the sheets." He tossed her onto the bed. "Go crazy."

"YAAAAYYY!" She scampered about picking up all the treats she could hold. When her hands were full, she ran back over to the adults and offered the groom a few pieces of her loot. "Here Uncle Ren!"

He put his hand in front of him and shook his head. "No, thanks."

Xue's smile faded and her eyes began filling up with tears. "Why?"

"I don't want any."

"Is it because it's from Xue? Do you not like Xue's candy?" The little tears were falling from her eyes.

Ren panicked slightly. "No, no, it's not that, it's…"

HoroHoro elbowed him. "Just take it. It'll satisfy her. When you're a father sometimes you just have to make your children happy and accept what they want to give you."

Ren slowly bent down and held his hand out. "On second thought, I think I'll have some."

Xue smiled brightly. "Okies! Here!" She handed him some of the sugared fruit candies. "Merry Wedding!" she cried.

He smiled listlessly. "Thanks."

* * *

"Oh doesn't our little Renny-poo look adorable?"

Ren shot HoroHoro a death glare as a servant straightened his cap. He knew that the scion hated dressing up like this, and he loathed the cap the most. It had been his father's, and the thought of having to wear such an accessory belonging to the man he once hated with a murderous passion was not very attractive.

"You're ready, Lord Ren," the servant said finally.

The groom heaved a sigh. "Finally. Let's go."

Yoh and HoroHoro grinned at each other and followed Ren to a carriage that was waiting outside. They were riding a short distance to the other side of the Tao property where Pin-Mei had gone into seclusion along with Rong, Jun, Ran, Anna, and Dúo in order to prepare for this special day. Finally, after over two weeks of separation, two weeks of sleeping in a bed that felt larger when she wasn't there, he was going to retrieve her…and make her his forever.

As soon as the small cottage came into view, Ren threw off his cap and robes, getting ready to run in and steal her. This plan would have worked in the West, but in China, it's not as easy.

As he neared the door, it opened and Rong appeared. The spirits of Ling and Shu were on either side of her, all wearing red. He stood rigidly.

"I've come for Pin-Mei," he said. He went to enter the house, but Rong blocked his way.

"You can't enter yet, Lord Ren."

"You have to earn her!"

"Um…Please answer our questions…"

Ren smirked. He was more than ready for this. HoroHoro and Yoh came up behind him.

"What's this about?" Yoh asked.

"Lord Ren must answer our questions about Lady Pin-Mei and her relationship with him. Incorrect answers must be paid for in cash. If he refuses to answer a question or do any of the tasks we ask to perform, he again must pay for it." She looked at her husband and the boy next to him. "Aokun, Yoh, the both of you are responsible for making sure that Ren answers his questions correctly and completes the stunts we assign him. His financial future counts on it." She grinned as if she was counting the money in her head. "Make sure you answer them correctly…or else Xue's going to have enough college money for Tokyo University."

Ren looked back at his groomsmen. "I'm not going to need your help. Pin-Mei and I have been together for almost six years, and I know her like the back of my hand. There's nothing about her that you know that I don't." He smirked. "Come on. Try me."

Rong returned the smirk. "Okay, Milord, we'll start with some easy questions."

"What is Lady Pin-Mei's favorite color?" Ling asked.

"Purple. You're insulting my intelligence."

"Um…What is Lady Pin-Mei's favorite book?"

"_Where the Red Fern Grows_ by Wilson Rawls. Yawn."

The two spirits turned to their leader, whose composure was not the least bit shaken. "They were giving you the easy questions," she said, her smirk still firm on her face. "From now on, you'll be dealing with me. Mine are much more in depth."

She walked up to him and stared him down. They looked like heated rivals about to throw wild punches at each other. To a certain extent, this was true. Ren wanted his bride, and Rong was standing in his way.

"Tell me the first Japanese phrase Lady Pin-Mei learned."

Ren grinned. "That's easy it's-,"

Yoh and HoroHoro grabbed him from behind, covering his mouth. He shook them off and looked at them angrily.

"What the hell is your problem? I told you, I've got this. I don't need your help."

The boys shook their heads. "The phrase, it's not what you think!" HoroHoro cried.

"What were you going to say?"

"'Your face is kind of like what stupid people have.' What else would it be?"

"It's 'I want to be the Shaman King so I can live an easy life'!" HoroHoro cried.

Yoh shook his head. "Ren's right."

"Then why the hell did you grab him too if you knew he was right?"

"I just wanted to make sure. Hehe."

Ren turned to Rong. "You face is kind of like what stupid people have."

"Correct." She blinked once. "What is the technique that you use for comforting her that is most effective?"

Ren stared at the ground. One hell of a question. He'd comforted her so many times in so many different ways. At what times did she quiet down the most?

He remembered how she had retreated to her room after Feng had slapped her milk away; how she had run away to the beach after Suo's appearance; how she had become upset when visiting her home.

This was something the other two couldn't help him with. If he didn't get this right, he'd gladly hand over his inheritance. He finally looked up at Rong.

"She…She likes it when I'm speaking harshly or cynically or seriously, but I'm touching and kissing her as well. She knows that even if my tone is cold, I still love her."

Rong raised her eyebrows and nodded. "Very good. Say Pin-Mei was in bed after a long and tiring day. She had been very lethargic, but not enough for you to notice. As you get into bed with her, you initiate a love making session. What does she do?"

Ren blinked and looked at the ground. He suddenly felt guilty.

One night about a month and a half ago, she had gone to bed early. But he hadn't noticed that there had been a real reason behind it. He had gotten into bed, started kissing her, and it eventually lead to sex. She had appeared even more lethargic than usual, but had joked saying it was his fault. It was…in a different way, maybe.

"Nothing…She does nothing…She just lets me do what I want with her."

Rong could see the guilt in his eyes as he spoke. "That's right. I think that question served its purpose." A small grin appeared on her face. "State her cup size."

His eyes shot open. "What? No way in hell!"

"Fine. The toll is thirty thousand yen."

"WHAT?"

"It's your choice…Pin-Mei told us the answer herself."

Ren glared at her before dipping his head to hide his face. He grumbled something.

Rong leaned over, her hand to her ear. "Sorry, I didn't hear you. What was that?"

"D! SHE'S A FUCKING D!" he yelled at her. "YOU HAPPY NOW? I JUST SOLD OUT MY BRIDE!"

Rong grinned. "No. I'm glad that you actually know and don't just ogle at them. I bet she is too." Her eyes narrowed. "Final question: Tell me her favorite position."

Ren's face turned deep red. "You-You've got to be kidding me! She still gets embarrassed when we have sex! There's no way she'd tell you something like that!"

"Oh, but she did."

"And she blushed! So cute!"

"Um…She's afraid of how she looks…"

"Well, of course she may feel insecure. She looks different," Rong said. "I mean, HoroHoro and I went through the same thing, but…" She grabbed Ren by red silk shirt he was wearing. "It's your job to make her feel sexy, and you better be doing a good job!"

He looked at her in disbelief. "I refuse to answer that question! My and Pin-Mei's sex life is none of your business!"

"Okay." She put out her hand. "One hundred thousand yen. Pay up."

He stared at her. "Are you fucking serious?"

"I'd like to know the answer about the fucking if that's what you mean…"

"FINE FINE FINE! OKAY YOU WANT TO KNOW SO BADLY? I'LL FUCKING TELL YOU! IT'S—,"

He looked behind him and saw Yoh and HoroHoro leaning over and listening intently. His face went red again, and he grabbed Rong by the collar of her red qipao dress and sheepishly whispered in her ear for a few moments. After her let go of her, Rong straightened, a devious grin on her face.

"Ooo lala," she said in a slightly high pitched voice. "Ren, you stud, you!"

"Did he get it right, Rong? Did he? Did he?"

"Oh yes. With even more detail than Lady Pin-Mei gave us."

"Um…So that means…"

All three girls gave him a thumbs up.

"Trivia test – PASSED!"

Ren breathed a sigh of relief. No more questions about things he didn't like sharing. The rest would be a piece of cake.

"Okay, Lord Ren," Rong said calmly. "For your first task, you must sing a song that convinces me that you really love Pin-Mei."

"…What?"

"Go on. Belt it. I'm listening."

"What makes you think I sit around listening to music? I don't know any songs!"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, come now, Milord. Pin-Mei hasn't been moving around as much, so I know she's been listening to music. And I know that you've been right there with her. It's your job to protect her, especially when she is in such a vulnerable state…Of course…you could always pay me…one hundred twenty thousand yen."

He glared at her. "You're a wretch, you know that?"

"Just sing or pay up."

Ren turned to his groomsmen. "Okay…This is not good."

"You mean you don't at least listen to what she's listening to?" HoroHoro cried.

"It's okay, Ren. I bet if you calm down you'll think of something."

Ren took a deep breath and closed his eyes. There was that one song by one of those pop sensations that she kept playing. She'd look at him while it played, smile, and then return to what she had been doing.

_What was that stupid song…?_

He opened his eyes and turned around. Rong raised her eyebrows.

"Okay, let's hear it."

_This is so embarrassing…_ "Couldn't really say why I became very initiative-taking / If you fall in love with someone, anything is worth doing / I want to announce loudly that I can't bear to be apart from you…"

Everyone stared at him. Rong looked slightly disappointed.

_I can't bag on him for having a bad voice…dammit…_

"…I want to just hold your hand like this and not let go / Can love be forever innocent without sadness / You leaning on my shoulder / You sleeping on my chest / Like this kind of life, I love you, you love me / I want a simple, simple love…"

"Okay, that's enough." Rong sighed.

"Dude, that was so beautiful!" HoroHoro cried as he wiped his eyes.

Yoh just smiled. "Wow, I never would have expected that from you, Ren."

He turned away to hide his face. "I only did it so I could get Pin-Mei alright? Shut up."

He heard some rummaging and looked up to see Rong removing a tape recorder from the chest of her qipao. She took out a tape and handed it to Ling and Shu.

"Take this to Lady Pin-Mei," she said, then looked at Ren and grinned.

"That isn't…"

Her grin became larger.

"RONG YOU BITCH! GIVE THAT BACK!"

He charged toward her to retrieve the tape, but was grabbed from behind. He looked over his shoulder to see HoroHoro looking at him with dagger-like eyes.

"Don't call my wife a bitch EVER again."

Ren just glared back at him. Rong shooed Ling and Shu away to deliver their parcel before tending to the boys before her.

"Aokun, thanks but I can take care of myself. Let go of him." He looked at her with almost hurtful eyes, but obeyed her. "Come on, you two. This is supposed to be the happiest day of Ren and Pin-Mei's lives. I won't tolerate either of you throwing punches over an ambiguous word like "bitch"."

Ren looked up at her hopefully. "You're going to let me in?"

She looked at him like he was stupid. "Hell no. Get back down there." He glared at her and did as he was told. She grinned, as if thinking about her next malicious task. "A good husband should be strong enough to protect his wife. Prove it. Handstand pushups. Right now."

Ren carefully removed his shirt and handed it to HoroHoro, who pretended to smell it, then sigh. He looked back at him, obviously weirded out.

"I was just kidding…"

"Sure you were."

He bent over and put his hand on the ground, then pushed off and balanced himself for a few moments.

"Okay," he said nonchalantly. "How many?" Rong was an idiot for making him do something having to do with strength. This was an easy win.

"333," she said smirking.

He glared at her, then began his task, not faltering in the slightest. Rong watched for a few moments, then went over to the groomsmen.

She handed HoroHoro some money. "Go get me some chilled milk pudding."

He stared at her. "Where the hell do I get that?"

She shrugged. "Go find it. If you can't, Ren fails his task and has to pay me fifty thousand yen."

He and Yoh looked at each other. "Rong, can't you at least give us some help."

She shook her head. "I'll give you some motivation, though." She whispered in his ear. "Remember that thing you wanted to try?"

His eyes widened and his face went pink. "Yeah…"

"Tonight. Get the pudding."

"Y-Yes ma'am." He hurriedly grabbed Yoh and they ran to the carriage. "BE RIGHT BACK!"

Rong smiled, then turned back to Ren. He was on seventy-two. She went inside for a moment, then came back out. He was still at it, not skipping numbers. He wanted to show that he was, indeed, strong enough to take care of Pin-Mei. He had proven it several times, and Rong knew it, but it didn't stop her from testing him one last time. It had been almost six years since Ren had freed Pin-Mei from her grandmother's chains. The possibility that he had slacked off was there, however unlikely it may be.

As she looked up, HoroHoro was rushing at her with a bowl of her favorite treat. She smiled. He slid and knelt in front of her.

"Here, I found it," he panted. He fumbled with the spoon as he scooped some up and, to her surprise, fed it to her.

She took it from him gently, and he sat there wagging his tail, waiting for praise.

"Good job, Horokeu," she said taking a bite of her treat. Then she kissed him.

Ren must have been annoyed, for he started counting out loud. "287, 288, 289…"

"Such a good groom," Rong observed.

But after he hit 300, he started losing steam. By 325, it seemed as though he would collapse at any moment. Rong saw this and squatted next to him.

"Is this all you've got, Ren?" she taunted. "I thought you'd pass easily. My mistake. Maybe you're not strong enough to protect Pin-Mei after all. Anyone could harm her in her current condition, and you wouldn't be able to stop them."

The look in his eyes intensified. "328…"

"Go on, struggle. Struggle all you want. She'll be in pain soon, Ren. Much worse than the pain you're experiencing right now. You won't be able to stop it. That pain's going to be all for you."

"330…"

"If you fail this task, you're worthless. I'll go find her a husband who can do **more** than 333 handstand pushups. And she'll have **his** children."

"331…"

"Oooh, I bet you feel good about yourself now, huh? Almost there. Average. Not special. Why Lady Pin-Mei would want such a bland man for a husband is beyond me."

"332…"

"You were barely able to lift yourself that time. Are you going to be able to do it this time? Will you? Or will you crash and burn?"

"333…"

She smiled and stood up, heading for the house. "Alright, Lord Ren. Let's go inside and-,"

"334…"

She stopped and turned around. His face was red, and she could see the veins in his arm. He was straining himself. If she didn't do something…

She quickly knelt down next to him. "Ren, you can quit, okay? I didn't mean any of the things I said! Just stop before you hurt yourself!"

"SH…SHUT UP!" he panted. "335…"

They watched him in silence as he continued his trial. A pool of sweat was on the ground, but he didn't seem to care or even notice.

"343…" He pushed himself up, then down. "344…3…4…" He collapsed.

Rong stared down at him. "You asshole. What'd you do that for? Now you're all sweaty and shit."

He was too busy panting on the ground. "She…She's not the only one…I need to protect…If I can't even protect her…how can I expect to be able to protect both of them?"

She smiled despite herself. She looked up at Yoh and her husband. "Can you two carry him to the washroom? An ice bath should do him some good."

They nodded and carried their friend inside.


	62. Wo Yong Yuan Ai Ni

I made a couple more voice actor decisions. Though she is no longer in the story, I chose Masako Katsuki to play Suo (she played the Kiishimu in Tsubasa Chronicles eps 9-10). At the suggestion of a friend, I chose Sanae Kobayashi to play Rong, who also played Nyu/Lucy in Elfen Lied, Xing Huo in Tsubasa Chronicles, and Lady Bat in Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch Pure. I chose Tomokazu Seki to play Yi. He was Jun in both versions of Kanon, Shuichi in Gravitation, Sosuke in Full Metal Panic and Kyo in Fruits Basket (haha, I just saw all of your eyes light up – ZOMG KYO!).

**Notes: Again, I'm messing with the wedding customs and adding some Western customs too since that's what I know most about.**

**I never told you this before (and I probably should have), but Xue's name is pronounced "Shoo-EH".**

**Since it's a wedding, some lines will be repeated.**

**In Chinese weddings, it's not unusual for the bride to change clothes as many as five times throughout the course of the ceremony and reception.**

**Lyrics from Coco Lee's "Moonlight Lover" appear in this chapter. (Also known as "A Love Before Time")**

**************Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-two: Wo Yong Yuan...Ai Ni**** (I Love You...Forever...)**

* * *

A half hour later, Ren, fully refreshed and dried off, sat down on a velvet couch to wait for Pin-Mei to emerge from the 'cock loft'. He was still in a little bit of pain, but…

_It's worth it…She's worth it…_

He became alert when he heard a giggle. As he looked to the doorway, he saw a tall woman with long wavy light pink hair and buns on the top of her head. She was dressed in a dark blue and gold hanfu that seemed to be made to display certain favorable features. Ren eyed her suspiciously as she walked over to sit next him.

"You must be Lord Ren," she said in a light tone.

"Yes…"

"Congratulations on your marriage...No one could have asked for a more handsome groom." She giggled again.

"…What do you want?"

She pretended to be embarrassed. "Oh my, you've found me out." She smiled. "I've come to help you."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Help me?"

She nodded. "We both know what sort of state Lady Pin-Mei is in right now. She's so fragile…almost too fragile for love making…"

He didn't let his eyes leave her. "Maybe so."

"You seem so deprived," she said in a sultry tone. "A man of your stature…the scion of such an illustrious family…" She reached out to touch him. He jerked away slightly. "...such a handsome face, such a perfect body...you deserve only the best…whatever you want whenever you want it…"

"Yeah?" He sounded interested.

She leaned toward him slightly.

"To be pleasured how you want..."

The concubine leaned closer to him, allowing him to see the titillating cleavage that seemed to be aching to be fully revealed. He could smell the intoxicating cherry blossoms from her perfume.

"I can give you all of that…and so much more…" she whispered in an arousing voice. "Lady Pin-Mei won't be ready for at least another hour. We would have enough time for at least one or two sessions…and even a few months from now, when her body can no longer bring you pleasure, I can…" She leaned even closer. "And she would never have to know…What do you desire, Lord Ren? Will you let me pleasure you?"

Ren remained still as she placed her left hand on his right thigh and began leaning closer to him. As her lips were about to touch his, he grabbed her from under her chin and thrust her away from him and onto the floor. She looked up at him, astonished.

"Lord Ren…I…I don't understand…"

He stood and glared down at her, his eyes full of rage. "I was fooled by harlots like you in the past, but I won't make that mistake again. Especially not on my wedding day, not when I have someone who more than satisfies my needs. She's my wife, and the woman who's going to bear my children. She's been sacrificing so much these last few months. I could never tire of her. In fact, recently I've become more and more attracted to her. Someone as depraved as you could never understand. Someone with no morals or discrimination of who she gives her body to doesn't turn me on in the least."

"But...But I can do so much more for you than she can! All the things she can't do for you, the things you desire, the things you want to do, that you want to try, I can! I can-"

Ren grabbed her by the throat and lifted her to his level.

"I. Said. No. What part of that doesn't a brainless trollop like you understand?" He started closing the hand wrapped around her throat. "You're better off dead. Then you won't have the chance to ruin anyone's life or relationship."

She started choking. "Pl—Please forgive me, Lord Ren! Please! I—I don't want...to die!"

But the hand was still closing off her windpipe. Tears ran down her face as it started turning a shade of blue.

"Ren! That's enough! You'll kill her!"

Rong grabbed his wrist, trying to loosen his grasp.

"You pass! You pass, okay? Now let her go!"

Ren's eyes widened. He dropped the girl to the ground, then looked at his hand in horror.

_I almost killed another innocent person..._

Rong tended to the girl, who was shaking with wide, horrified eyes. Her face, which had been a shade of blue only moment before , was now chalk white.

"I...I almost died, JieJie...I almost died..."

Rong looked guilty as she held her sister close. "I'm sorry. You were good enough to do this for me, and now this happened...I didn't plan on him reacting that strongly."

Ren stared down at them. "You mean...This was..."

She nodded. "This was a trial to test your fidelity. I asked my younger sister here, Yu-lan, to pose as a concubine and try to seduce you. You exceeded my expectations. I just didn't plan on you becoming violent."

He looked at the ground in shame. Then he knelt down in front of them.

"I...I'm sorry..." he whispered. "I just...In my past I..."

"It's...It's alright, Lord Ren," Yu-lan whispered back, still quivering. She gave a shaky smile. "I'm jealous...Lady Pin-Mei gets a groom who is handsome, kind, and loyal...If only I could..."

Her sister patted her. "It's hard, I know...But you'll find that someone just for you. Someone's missing you right now. They may not have met you yet, but a part of them is missing. That part is **you**."

"JieJie..."

"You don't have any duties, so you would be allowed to marry. Be patient. You'll find him. Or maybe he'll come find you, like Horokeu did for me."

"And how Pin-Mei came to me..." Ren said in a distant voice. He was remembering that fateful night almost six years ago. The night she had come to him as a present. His little gift of love. He looked up. "Where is she?"

Rong smiled. "Ah, yes. Let me go get her." She stood and quickly walked out of the room and up a flight of stairs.

He and Yu-lan looked at each other. She had a baby face. 'Adorable'. That was what she was. She hadn't yet made the transformation from 'adorable' to 'beautiful'. She looked to be about Pin-Mei's age. She blushed as her eyes drifted to his mouth, and then his thighs.

"I'm so embarrassed...Saying and doing those things..."

"It's alright. You were just doing what Rong told you to do."

She nodded slowly. "I...I must go..." She stood and quickly ran out of the room. Ren sighed and sat down on the velvet couch again.

That's when the thought hit him. He had been with Pin-Mei as she grew up, as her body should have showed signs of maturity. But he had spent every day with her, so he never really noticed her transformation. Had there been one? He couldn't remember.

_How could I miss something like that?_

He cursed himself for not paying enough attention. The next time he saw her, he would make sure to look at her more. Maybe even compliment her if he felt like it. She would probably die; Compliments weren't something that he dished out daily.

_The next time I see her...She'll be in her bridal robes..._ He smiled weakly to himself. _It's been so long...It's finally happening...After today, there will be no doubt whatsoever that she'll be with me forever...I'll never have to be afraid of being alone again..._

He heard Rong clear her throat. He looked up to see her standing in the doorway, smiling. She stepped to the side, then looked down the hall that was hidden by the wall of the room he was in.

"Come, Milady. Lord Ren's been waiting a very long time to see you again. Not to mention he passed every trial with flying colors." She suddenly put her hand up to stop her. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT! I almost forgot!" She walked up to Ren and held out her hand. "You must pay me before you can have her."

Ren sighed as he took out a small red envelope. "How much do you want?"

"Eight thousand, five hundred yen."

"No, Rong! I'm not worth that much!" Pin-Mei's voice came from the hall.

Ren stared at the doorway almost hungrily. He hadn't seen her for more than two weeks. At this point, just the sound of her voice was enough to ignite a flame of desire deep within him.

Rong smirked. "You're right, Milady," she said in a loud voice. "You're worth so much more!" She looked him in the eye. "Forty-two thousand yen." (AN: More than $550)

"No, Rong! That's too much!" the voice came again, but it was quickly hushed by Ran and Dúo.

"A good bride stays silent," they whispered.

Ren shrugged and handed her a packet with the requested amount in it.

"I had actually brought over one hundred thousand, but that works too." He smirked. "But if I were you, I wouldn't have sold her for all the milk in China."

Rong stared at him, then smiled. She took the packet. "That's why I'm selling her to you." She walked back to the hall. "Alright, Milady, you can come out now."

"I'm so nervous..."

"Don't be. You look beautiful."

"O-Okay..."

He heard her inhale, then begin to walk towards the door. His eyes widened. Rong had just made the biggest understatement imaginable.

She was wearing long red and gold robes that trailed on the floor. The bust hugged her tightly, but from the hips down, it was free-sized so that she could feel more comfortable. The sleeves covered her hands, but it didn't stop her from holding a fan in them to shield her face.

Rong snatched it away from her. "Milady, you're wearing a red veil, he can't see your face anyhow."

Pin-Mei nodded, remembering that she had to be silent. She met Ren in the center of the room and bowed to him.

"You don't have to do that,"

She nodded furiously. He sighed.

"When is she allowed to talk?"

"After you lift her veil," his mother replied.

He raised his eyebrows. "Well, that's easy enough." He reached for the bottom of the veil.

"HEY!" Rong slapped his hand like he was a child reaching across the table for a cookie. "Hands off. You can't see her face until the ceremony starts."

Ren fumed, then grasped Pin-Mei's hand and began pulling her out of the house. "Let's go. I want the ceremony to start."

Under her veil, Pin-Mei had looked confused at first, but then smiled at his last sentence. _I do too...I want my dream to come true..._

Rong called after them. "REN STOP! YOU HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WITH HER!" she yelled.

He immediately slowed down, remembering her condition. Pin-Mei brought her other hand over to his and held it. He looked down at her.

"Can you not see that well?" She shook her head. He gave a small smirk. "I'm always taking care of you, aren't I?" She nodded shyly.

They got into the carriage. Before they could shut the door, Rong hopped in and sat across from them. Ren glared at her.

"What the hell are you doing in here?"

"Making sure you won't lift her veil."

He grumbled and looked out the window. He felt something land on his arm, and looked down to see that Pin-Mei had taken to leaning on him, her head on his shoulder. Her breathing told him that she was sleeping.

"Don't worry about her. She's just tired," Rong said, seeming lethargic herself. "As you would expect, she was up late worrying about today, going through the whole cold feet thing." She saw his nervous expression. "It's not that she didn't want to marry you, she was just scared about taking on the role as the wife of the scion and eventual head of the Tao family. You know her, she has almost no confidence. Her emotions are a little whack, and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out why. Just do what I said and make her feel desired. Especially today and tonight. Don't be a hardass. Little girls dream about this day, and Pin-Mei's no different." She smiled. "Strangely, neither was I. Just enjoy today. It's supposed to be the happiest day of your life."

Ren nodded as he looked at his sleeping bride. He wanted to yank that veil off and see if she really had changed...Stupid tradition.

* * *

Rong looked out at the crowd that had congregated at the lake. Jasmine petals were scattered around the altar where the priest stood, and small archways were on the far left and right. It was almost time.

She looked down at Xue. "You ready, sweetheart?"

"Yeah-huh!" her daughter cried excitedly.

"You remember what to do, right?"

She nodded. "Don't worry, Mommy," she said. "Xue's 'sperienced at this!"

Rong smiled and tapped her back. "Go on, then."

Xue giggled and skipped down the aisle throwing the petals of cherry blossoms she had brought from home. The crowd watched her, exchanging giggles and coos of endearment. Rong looked at HoroHoro.

"Shall we?"

He smiled and nodded. They walked down the aisle together, separating at the altar. He stood at the priest's right, and she went toward the archway at his left to help the bride with the final preparations.

"This is very modern for a Chinese wedding," Yoh observed from his seat.

"Of course. It's 2007; hardly anyone goes through all the traditions anymore," Anna said. "It's a wonder they even carried out as many of the customs as they did."

Xue twirled in front of her father, who then pointed over to where the Asakura family sat, telling her to join them. She nodded and ran over to them. Still giggling, she plopped herself down next to Hana.

He gave her a wave. "Hey, Xue!"

Her smile faded and she took to staring at her shoes, her face pink. "H-Hi, Hana..."

But everyone quieted down as Ren walked up to the small stage and stood in front of HoroHoro and the master of ceremonies. His friend couldn't help but notice that he was a little pale.

"Oi, Ren, you okay?"

The groom practically tossed his head. "Of course I am. Who do you think you're talk to?" But his eyes weren't as convincing. It was apparent that pre-marital jitters could affect even the strongest of men.

Some faint music played and Ren turned to see Rong slowly leading Pin-Mei toward them. She was holding lilies in her hands, so her guide put her hand on her back in order to direct her. When she was in front of him, Rong nodded, signaling that, at last, he could remove her veil and look at her face.

"Just be careful," she whispered. "She's really shy about how she looks."

Ren looked at Pin-Mei again. Her head was bowed, but more out of embarrassment than respect. He smirked, then gently lifted the veil over her head.

Before he could get the slightest glimpse of her, she grabbed a fan, opened it, and put it in front of her face, not even allowing her eyes to see over it. A few giggles and chuckles came from the crowd. He stared at it for a few moments, surprised, then gently took it from her and closed it. She lowered her head in an effort to hide her face. When he lifted her chin, however, she gave no resistance. His eyes widened slightly.

_How in the world did I miss this?_

Her face wasn't the least bit round anymore. Even her eyes were less wide and full of innocence, but had still retained their warmth. The girl whose looks he had decided weren't all that special nearly six years ago had grown up, and now had a mature face to match.

She blushed as he continued staring at her, making it hard to tell if he had lifted the veil at all.

"Do I...look okay?"

He smiled at her softly. "Of course." He paused, getting ready for her reaction. "You look beautiful."

The surprise in her eyes was priceless. Her face became even redder as her eyes began shifting nervously, trying her best not to look him in the eye.

"Th-Th-Thank you..." She dipped her head toward the ground, her eyes peeking up at him. "Y-You look very handsome..."

Ren blinked, then tried to turn his face away to hide it.

"Thanks..."

Rong and HoroHoro smiled at each other, then went to go sit in the audience. Ren helped Pin-Mei sit on a small cushioned stool that stood at the altar. Then he held her hands as the priest began.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered..."

"I hate this part," Rong grumbled as she an HoroHoro sat down. "Blah, blah, blah. Yeah, they love each other. We know that. Let's just get to the 'I do's and get to the reception."

Finally, the elder turned to the couple, and Pin-Mei removed a red fan from her sleeve.

"What's with the fan?" HoroHoro whispered.

"She's supposed to give it to her parents to symbolize her leaving them to go live with Ren...But since neither of her parents are here, I don't know what they're..."

"Will Usui Rong please approach the altar,"

Rong's eyes widened. She looked at her husband, who just smiled at her.

"Seems like they want you up there. You better go." She nodded dumbly and stood, then walked to stand in front of the couple.

"I...I don't understand..." she whispered.

Pin-Mei smiled at her. "You took care of me for over twelve years...when I had no other adults to lean on, to teach me right from wrong, to take care of me when I was sick, to help me with homework... Xu Hua may have given birth to me, and while I love her, and I thank her for sacrificing herself so that I could live, Rong, you're the only mother I've ever known"

A tear reluctantly fell down Rong's cheek. "Pin-Mei..."

The bride held out the fan as her groom put his hand over hers.

"Thank you for taking care of her, Rong," he said. "I'll take over now."

Rong smiled weakly. "You've been doing that for the past six years."

"Just take the fan and go back to your seat before Pin-Mei starts crying," he said with fake anger.

"Heh. Fine." She looked at Pin-Mei once more, who smiled, before gently taking the fan and going back to sit with her husband. "That wasn't at the rehearsal," she said looking down at the fan wistfully.

"Now we will have the vows." The couple held hands as the priest turned to Pin-Mei.

"Do you, Pin-Mei, take Ren to be your lawfully wedded husband..."

Rong let out a quiet coo. Her husband looked at her.

"What?"

"Look at Pin-Mei,"

He looked up and saw that she was desperately biting her lip to keep herself from crying.

"Why doesn't she just let it all out like she usually does?"

Rong tilted her head. "I'm not quite sure. But I think it might have something to do with trying to prove herself to her new in-laws."

"Prove something?"

"The Tao family has an immense amount of pride, you know that from being around Ren. Now Pin-Mei, who's been like a scared puppy her whole life, is joining that family. I think she feels like she has to prove that she can carry that amount of pride. To her, if she cries now, even on a day when most women cry tears happiness, it will be a sign of weakness."

"Jeez...She's taking a lot more seriously than she has to. She's just getting married."

"It just shows how important it is to her to keep Ren's honor."

He sighed. "You Chinese and your honor."

"You'll bring honor to us all!" Xue sang.

The parents sighed and looked back up at the ceremony.

"...until death do you part?"

Pin-Mei took a quick, yet deep, breath to keep her tears in.

"I do."

The curate smiled and turned to the groom.

"And do you, Ren, take Pin-Mei to be your lawfully wedded wife in a state of holy matrimony? Do you promise that you will love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon her your heart's deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her as long as you both shall live until death do you part?"

Ren looked across him at Pin-Mei, whose lip was almost bleeding. His mouth turned up.

"I do."

"May the tokens of your love be brought forth."

HoroHoro jumped up, and looked like he was just going to toss Ren the small ring box when Rong pinched his waist. He relented and walked up to them, ignoring the pain in his side.

"Here you go," he said, putting the box on a pedestal that stood to the right of them. Ren nodded at him and he went back to his seat.

The cleric placed his hand on the box. "May these rings be blessed as the symbol of this affectionate unity. These two lives are now joined in one unbroken circle. Wherever they go, may they always return to one another. May these two find in each other the love for which all men and women yearn. May they grow in understanding and in compassion. May the home which they establish together be such a place that many will find there a friend. May these rings on their fingers symbolize the touch of the spirit of love in their hearts."

Everyone watched as he opened the box and took out a large gold wedding band, and then handed it to Pin-Mei. She blinked, obviously confused that it was being given to her first.

"Rong, aren't the men supposed to put the ring on first? That's how we did it."

She smirked. "Yeah. Just watch."

"Pin-Mei, in placing this ring on Ren's finger, repeat after me; Ren, you are now consecrate to me as my husband from this day forward,"

"Ren, you are now consecrate to me as my husband from this day forward..."

He just watched her, a seemingly amused look on his face. Though she was still confused, she kept repeating the words she was fed. She only faltered once as she took a deep breath to keep herself under control.

"...as the pledge of my love and as the symbol of our unity and with this ring...I thee wed."

She smiled at him, still trying to hide her fluster at the uncharacteristic smile on his face. True, it was their wedding day, and she wanted him to be just as happy as she was that this was finally happening, but that smile seemed to be telling her something. Though she tried her hardest to decipher it, nothing seemed to come to light

The chaplain nodded to Ren and gave him the other ring. "Ren, in placing this ring on Pin-Mei's finger, repeat after me; Pin-Mei, you are now consecrate to me as my wife from this day forward."

Ren slipped the ring on her finger and held it there.

"Pin-Mei, you are now consecrate to me as my wife from this day forward."

"And I give you this ring,"

"And I give you this ring,"

Pin-Mei tried to calm herself as she listened to him. As much as he loved her, and she knew how much he did, to go off on romantic ramblings wasn't like him; it wasn't his style. He would rather be subtle about saying sweet words to her, almost as if he were embarrassed to say such things out loud. That, or he would simply attack her and show her how much he loved her rather than say it. All the same, her face was turning slightly redder than it had been. She dipped her head slightly to look at her hands, even to get momentary relief from his gaze.

"As the pledge of my love,"

"As the pledge of my eternal and undying love..."

Her eyes widened and she snapped her head up to look at him. He was smiling warmly at her as he squeezed her hands. Knowing that he couldn't touch her more, he leaned in slightly.

"I mean it," he whispered into her ear.

He pulled back to look into her eyes, but found that they had quickly filled up with tears. Some sounds of adoration of the scene came from the onlookers as Pin-Mei tried to discreetly hide her face.

HoroHoro chuckled. "Well, so much for not crying."

Rong looked at him rather wistfully. "It's hard to keep your composure up there. Everyone's staring at you, and you're happy you could burst. I'm amazed she made it this far."

"Yeah, you were crying during the 'I do's."

_He smiled at her. "Hey, don't cry. You're making me feel like I'm doing something wrong."_

She smiled and held his hand. "If only Pin-Mei had been alive enough to see it."

She was referring to the year-and-a-half-long depression Pin-Mei had had less than a year before. Their wedding had taken place that May, and Pin-Mei hadn't been in a state where Jiuhuo had felt that it was safe for her to go out and be amongst so many people. Ren had gone alone, knowing that he had to support his friend in his new marriage, even though he had fleeting thoughts of doubt that he would ever have the chance to enjoy such a ceremony himself.

Yet here he was, standing opposite of her, with her silently bawling her eyes out just because he had added three words to the vow.

"And as the symbol of our unity...and with this ring...I thee wed."

He stroked her hand with his thumb as she tried not to let herself shake from her tears.

"Why are you crying?" he whispered. A soft smile was still on his face.

She still kept her head down. "You...You just don't usually say things like that...unless something bad is happening...like when I died...or...when I was depressed...or...or..."

"Nothing bad is going to happen," he reassured her. "Aren't I allowed to say things like that? Especially today?"

"I...I guess so...It's not like I could ever stop you from doing anything else..."

The cleric had been looking back and forth between them, and finally decided to move on with the ceremony, whether they were ready or not.

"May you always share with each other the gifts of love, be one in heart and in mind; may you always create a home together that puts in your hearts' love, generosity, and kindness. In as much as Ren and Pin-Mei have consented together in marriage before this company of friends and family and have pledged their faith – and declared their unity by giving and receiving a ring – are now joined. You have pronounced yourselves husband and wife but remember to always be each other's best friend."

She finally looked up at him. _Best friend...Rong, Ling, and Shu were the only friends I had until I met him...I never thought of it before...I guess I never considered having children with my best friend. _She smiled. _Ren's my best friend..._

Ren had similar thoughts. _A wife as a best friend..._ He could hear Yoh and HoroHoro giggling to one another at the sappy sight before them. _Yes, definitely better than those two imbeciles._

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife – and may your days be good and long upon the earth...You may now kiss the bride."

Ren wasted no time leaning over and capturing her lips with his own. After being without it for over two weeks, nothing was going to get between him and that sensation he had been longing for – not even the eyes of over one hundred people.

Pin-Mei knew that she should savor the behavior her husband was exhibiting today. Who knew when it would happen again.

_Maybe I should disappear every once in a while, if he's going to act like this._

* * *

They got into the carriage and began the ride to the banquet hall, which was back on the other side of the Tao estate. With no Rong to watch his every move, Ren was finally able to alone with his bride.

He gently placed his hand on her stomach. "How are you feeling?"

She sighed and leaned against him. "Happy. Loved... Tired."

"They took care of you?"

"Of course they did. Duo and your mom really know what they're talking about."

"I would hope so."

Silence.

He leaned over and kissed her; lips first, then her neck.

"I love you."

She smiled. "I love you too."

He kissed her again as he slipped his left hand into her robes.

"D-Don't! They'll hear us!"

He retracted the hand. "You're right. It'll spoil tonight." He brought his face close to hers. "Tonight I'll show you why virgins are always in a rush to get married."

Her face bright red, she turned away. He just smirked to himself. After all this time together, he could still make her blush like the first time they met. She leaned against him moments later.

"We're going to be there soon. This is no time for you to sleep."

Her eyes were still closed. "After all these sleepless nights I've been having lately, I'm sleeping whenever my body lets me."

"Alright. Just make sure you can wake up. You still need to change."

"Mmmhmm..."

"I'm surprised they found a dress that could fit you."

"...That was mean..."

Leaning over, he could see that there was a slightly hurt look on her face. "...Sorry."

"...Whatever..." She fell asleep.

Ren rubbed her shoulder as he thought about what was to come. The reception. The thought of what he had to do was making him sick. Even with Rong's help, he would feel better just skipping the whole thing.

* * *

_Rong kicked him into the banquet hall, a boom box slung over her shoulder.__ She locked the door behind her and stuffed the key in her bra._

_Ren looked up at her angrily. "What the hell is this?" She smirked as she set the boom box on the floor and turned it on._

_"Milord, I'm teaching you how to waltz."  
_

_He looked at her like she had three heads. "What?"_

_She sighed and shook her head. "For a groom you really are dense." She walked up to him, her hands on her hips. "Are you even aware of what Pin-Mei's favorite part of a reception is?"_

_He just stared at her. She sighed again._

"_It's the first dance between the bride and groom. She thinks it's so romantic and sappy stuff like that. So..." Her eyes narrowed. "You have to make her enjoy that dance, and I'm going to show you how."_

"_Hell no. No way. I'm no fruit. I'm not dancing like that."_

"_In case you're unaware of this fact, she's not going to get married again, so this is the only chance she has to dance with you."_

"_Will she even be able to?"_

"_Oh, trust me, she's been practicing ever since she was four."_

_Ren groaned and looked at the floor. The wedding was less than a week away. He had five days to learn how to dance like he drank tea with his pinky out._

"_So, are you going to swallow your pride and dance with me..." She leaned in, speaking in a tone to make him feel horrible. "Or are you going to be responsible for causing Pin-Mei's dream of dancing with her 'prince' to go unfulfilled?"_

_He looked at the floor some more. "Fine. For her sake, I'll do it."_

_Rong smiled and patted his shoulder. "There's a good groom. Always thinking of his bride."_

"_Let's just do it, okay? I want to get this over with."_

_She grinned again. "Alright." _

_She took his right hand and placed it on her waist, then placed her left on his forearm. He pushed her away._

"_I didn't say you could touch me."_

"_Ren, seriously. During a waltz you touch the person you're dancing with. It's going to be something you have to deal with if you want to be able to dance for Pin-Mei."_

_He folded his arms and looked away. "I bet I can dance fine without your help."_

_She cocked an eyebrow. "Oh really? Prove it."_

_He glared at her. "No."_

_She snickered. "That's what I thought."_

_After some coaxing, she got him to resume their position as she began to teach him._

"_You're __**way**__ too tense. Loosen up, or it'll look like she's dancing with a cardboard cutout."_

"_I still don't like touching you."_

"_I'm not asking you to."_

"_And I definitely don't like __**you**__ touching __**me**__."_

"_Apparently not. Now just cooperate so I can teach you and go back to getting Pin-Mei ready for the wedding." They started moving again. "Dancing is a lot like fighting."_

_He frowned at her. "How so?"_

"_Well, you have to move in response to your opponent. In this case, Pin-Mei is your opponent and you have to respond to her in a way so that you can move in harmony."_

"_Whatever."_

_A few hours passed, and finally, Rong turned off the boom box._

"_Believe it or not, that was pretty good."_

_Ren scoffed at her. "Of course. Who do you think you were dancing with?"_

_She rolled her eyes and waved him off. "I'll be back tomorrow. You better retain all that you learned today, or I'll have to kick your ass again."_

* * *

_I did...but it's still going to be so embarrassing...Dancing like a fruitcake..._

He waited in a small room next to banquet hall for Pin-Mei to appear. Finally, the door cracked open and she peered out sheepishly. Rong seemingly kicked it fully open and gently pushed her out. Pin-Mei was now clad in a red satin dress that was free around the hips and waist to accommodate her. She looked over shoulder, defeated, at Rong, who was holding a fan. It was obvious that she had taken it from the blushing bride.

Sensing how self-conscious she was, he smiled at her. "You look nice."

She snapped her head back to look at him, then at the floor, blushing. Rong took her friend's hand and gave it to Ren.

"Go on, before she runs away."

He smirked. "Come on." Pin-Mei nodded and followed him.

As they entered the ballroom, cheers came from every corner. When Ren looked over his shoulder, he found that his new wife was practically hiding behind him. He gently pulled her out and lead her to the table where they would be sitting at the front of the room. The other guests sat at tables that were assembled just along the walls, leaving the center spacious. Once drinks had been poured, HoroHoro stood, glass in hand.

"Well, I guess this is where I get to say my bit," he said. He glanced at his hand, obviously consulting notes, then looked up.

"One of the first times I met Ren, he was sitting across from me, sipping his milk like he always does. Then he insulted me, telling me that I had the face of a stupid person. I gotta say, I thought he was a bastard. He acted like he was better than me. I hated that. We fought a lot." He smiled as he looked down for a moment. "Kinda like brothers." He looked up again. "I guess I never thought of him as a friend. Just this dude who had forced me to be on his team- which he named after himself. But..."

He looked over at Ren, who had a slightly miffed expression on his face. The groom didn't like the rather insulting things his best man was saying about him.

""But...then Ren did something for me that nearly cost him his life. It was reckless and stupid...but it was by far the most that anyone had ever done for me up to that point. At that moment, I knew that, to him, I wasn't just some punk for him to beat up on. He cared about me as a friend. As much as it surprised me, I felt happy...But there was also another time down the road that I became happy because of something he did."

As everyone waited for him to go on, he simply sat down. An awkward round of applause came from the crowd. When it was silent, Rong stood up.

"When I met Pin-Mei, she was a person who was feared, scorned, and loathed. The servants around Xu-Fan Castle kept saying that, because of her birth, she was cursed; that anyone who associated with her would have bad luck. She was someone so angry at the world, that there was no doubt in my mind that she would someday be responsible for the deaths of many. As I got to know her, I understood why she was the way she was. Her father's depression prevented her from having a loving relationship with him, and her grandmother only served to make the wounds in her heart deeper. Children at school harassed her for something she couldn't control. She had no friends except for the stuffed animals that she clutched as she cried alone in her room. Worst of all, she thought that no one cared about her, or what happened to her. She thought that no one loved her. I began to feel as if she had been dealt a bad hand by the dealer of life, and that it would continue until she finally left this world..." A small smile crossed her face. "...But then she met Ren.

"When I came here to mind her after she had been here for a few weeks, she had already taken a liking to him. To this day, I still can't see why she took to him so easily. He was abrasive, to say the least. All the same, whenever I saw them together, she was smiling. Even though it was faint, I saw that, in small ways, that he must have cared for her as well. He took care of her, mending wounds much like his own...Wounds that I could never understand. I...I was jealous of the attention he received from her. When we had to leave, I was overjoyed. I thought 'I have her all to myself again!' But that wasn't how she wanted it."

She looked up at them.

"When we left, all those smiles disappeared. It was like she had been taken off of life support. The days after that were a struggle for her. It's only now that I see how much it meant for her to be with him.

"Even when they met again nearly six years ago, I still hated him. I wanted nothing to do with him...But when they both needed help, I rushed to give mine to her. Still...I wasn't alone..."

HoroHoro stood up. "I, with my friends, went to help as well. It was after everything was peaceful again that I realized the second monumental thing he had done for me. If it wasn't for Ren and Pin-Mei..." He put his arm around Rong's waist. "I never would have met my wife."

Rong smiled, a few tears in her eyes. "I never would have met my husband...or have such a beautiful daughter..." She looked to Xue, who was sitting next to her at the table.

The toddler raised her hand and waved as she smiled brightly. "-Xue!" She looked around at all the faces that were now staring at her. She smiled even more. "Hi, everybody!"

Her parents smiled at her, remembering how it was because of their friends that they had such a blessing with them today.

"So, as the two of you get ready to start a family of your own, we give you our best wishes," Rong continued.

"And I thank you for tolerating Rong long enough for me to meet her." She frowned and pinched him. "OW! I mean, thank you for allowing us to meet each other."

They both sat down as the clapping came loud and strong. As expected, Pin-Mei was crying up at the bride/groom table, while Ren just smiled faintly and held her hand. Then he stood up.

"Come on."

"What?"

"The dance, remember?"

"...No! I can't! I don't want to put you through that!"

"You're going to let those hours I spent practicing go to waste?"

Her eyes widened, telling him that she had been unaware of the lessons that Rong had been giving him.

As the music started, he took the jacket of his robes off and handed it to Li, who went to go hang it up. He stood before her in a red and gold silk shirt, his hand held out in a prince-like manner. "Don't make me say something stupid like 'May I have this dance?'"

She cracked a smile, then put her hand in his and allowed him to lead her to the center of the room. She leaned forward as much as she could in a bow, while he only nodded his head slightly. He took her right hand in his left and held it as he put the other on her hip. Her left rest on his right forearm, taking a moment to trace the muscle with her finger. Once he knew she was ready, he began leading her as they danced across the floor.

Rong sighed. "It's just like Beauty and the Beast..." She took a sip of wine.

HoroHoro glared at her. "Are you calling Ren ugly?"

She blinked. "Of COURSE not!" she cried, but as she turned away, she snickered into her glass. He poked her and she looked up. "What is it?"

"You gotta translate the song for me. I don't know what they're saying."

Rong smirked. It was in Mandarin, and he had failed her "classes" when she had tried to teach him. "Alright." She listened for a few moments. "They're singing about how love comes from the moon, and how the singer thinks about her lover when she looks at it."

They watched Ren twirl Pin-Mei and let her fall, catching her gracefully. After spinning a few times, she uncurled from him, but he pulled her back, looking at her with dominant eyes, as if to tell her not to leave him like that again.

"She's afraid that if she looks away, he'll disappear. She wants the stars to lead her to him. She will cry for him under the moonlight, and, without regret, she will fall into an eternal sleep beneath the moonlight. And for the sake of her love for him, her heart will shatter, and she will die."

"Shi...I mean Gods...That's so deep."

"And..."

As the last lines of the final chorus came, Ren spun Pin-Mei around, then took her into his arms, cradling her.

"_**A night in my dreaming sleep/**__**Is also a year in my memory,**_"

She looked up at him, her eyes full of stars.

"Shou ni ai wo..." she whispered along with the song.

"_**Tell me you love me**_,"

He looked down at her and smiled.

"Wo ai ni," he whispered in her ear before kissing her.

"_**For love's sake, I wish to sink deep in sleep...forever...**_,"


	63. Missions Fulfilled

**Notes: If you never picked up on what's going on with Pin-Mei, I'm telling you in this chapter.**

**Just to remind you, it's currently October.**

********** Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Three: Missions Fulfilled**

* * *

After the dance, Pin-Mei took to circulating around the room and mingling with guests. Ren was supposed to do the same, but chose to just stand off to the side sipping wine with HoroHoro.

"Yes, well, thank you for coming," Pin-Mei said to an elderly couple as she rose from her chair. She began walking back over to the Usui/Asakura table, ignoring the pitter-patter of small feet behind her. As she stopped in front of a chair at the table, Xue kept walking and bumped into her. Pin-Mei turned and smiled down at her.

Ren frowned. "What are you doing, following her around like that?"

The young Ainu smiled. "Xue wants to be like Mommy! Xue's practicing so she can protect auntie's baby after it gets born!"

Rong laughed. "I think she's more like Pin-Mei and how she used to follow Ren around when they were little." She grinned at him.

Ren stared at her, then walked away. "Whatever."

Pin-Mei just smiled again and sat down. HoroHoro followed his friend across the room.

"What's up? You seem a little stressed."

Ren sighed. "Part of me doesn't feel like any of this is happening. Like it's just a dream. Things like that just reinforce that it's not." He stared into his glass. "I'm married now. She finally belongs to me. She's finally all mine...But soon it's not going to be just the two of us anymore."

HoroHoro grinned. "That's right!" They looked over to where Pin-Mei was holding Xue's hand against her rounded stomach. Xue's eyes widened and she giggled, jumping up and down. "She must be due any day, right?" He took a sip of wine.

"The doctor said it'll be about another three months," Ren replied casually.

HoroHoro covered his mouth to prevent himself from spitting out what he had just drank. He looked up at Pin-Mei again.

"You're fucking kidding me!" he cried pointing at her. "Rong wasn't even that big when she was nine months pregnant! Something's obviously wrong here! Either that or that's an awfully big baby!"

"You're overreacting," Ren said, still placid. "It's been five years since you've seen a pregnant woman, so you probably don't have a clear picture of what one at this stage looks like. Nothing's wrong with her." He glanced at his wife listlessly, thinking of what had happened over twenty years ago. "...I've made sure of it."

Pin-Mei looked up from entertaining Xue and their eyes met. She closed hers with a smile and gave him a gentle wave. Ren raised his hand slightly and dumbly waved back at her. HoroHoro grinned and nudged him.

"Look at you! Getting all bashful just because she's waving to you!"

Ren pushed him away, his face slightly colored. "What the hell are you talking about? She's the one who blushes over every single little thing I do to her, even after all this time. Even now, five years later, she gets bashful when we have sex! She can't do the same to me!"

His friend rolled his eyes, the devilish smirk still on his face. He put him in a headlock and began to noogy him.

"I know what it is! You love how helpless she is right now, and you feel all manly because you got her pregnant. Seeing her like this makes you more attracted to her. No need to deny it! I went through the same thing when Rong was pregnant. Better make the most of tonight!"

Ren pushed him off again and tossed his head. "Unlike you, I think about more than just sex when it comes to my wife," he said in a superior tone.

"Suuure you do."

He was about to turn to argue with him when Pin-Mei called him over. She giggled to Rong and the others as he approached her.

"What is it?"

She took his hand and placed it where Xue's had been. She smiled. "You're the only one who hasn't done it yet."

He blinked and looked down at his hand. "What?"

"Can't you feel him?"

"...No."

Her smile faded a little, trying not to seem bothered. "Oh...he must have fallen asleep..." She dipped her head slightly.

"WAKE UP!" Xue screamed, then smiled, as if she had done her job. Her mother narrowed her eyes at Ren.

"At least lie, goddammit," she growled, careful to make sure that neither the bride nor her daughter could hear them.

He looked back down at Pin-Mei again. She looked dejected. However, she was at the point where her moods had become unstable due to her pregnancy, so he tried not to take it too personally. He closed his eyes and sighed.

A sudden vibration tickled his palm, and he looked up at her. She was all excited again, as she always was when this happened.

He smiled warmly at her. "I felt it."

Her smile grew wider and she held his hand. The other couple watched them, their own smiles gracing their faces.

"Well, I suppose this is as good a time as ever to tell you guys," Rong said as she motioned to grasp HoroHoro's hand.

The Tao couple looked up at them with questioning faces.

"I'm pregnant again,"

They just stared at her. Suddenly, Pin-Mei squealed.

"This is fantastic, they'll be able to play with each other!" She clapped her hands lightly.

A few of the other guests heard the commotion and walked over to the table to congratulate the women on their pregnancies. Some of the female guests stayed and a roar of shrill voices soon filled the air.

"You must be so excited about becoming a father, Lord Ren!" one guest said turning to him.

He looked up, then turned his head away. "Yeah..."

Pin-Mei looked at him, seemingly concerned. "Are you okay?"

He put his glass on the table and once again removed his robes and placed them on the chair next to him.

"I need some air."

He turned and quickly exited the room.

Rong cracked her knuckles. "Jeez, what the heck is wrong with him, today? He just keeps leaving." She turned to Pin-Mei. "I'll go get him." She was about to leave when there was a tug on her wrist.

"No...I'm the wife...I'll go."

She turned to see Pin-Mei looking at the floor, a bereaved expression on her face.

"Pin-Mei..."

"But first..."

Rong leaned over. "Yes? What do you need?"

"Um...Can you help me up?"

* * *

Ren stood on the balcony and looked up at the sky. The innumerable stars flashed and twinkled as he searched them for answers. Finding none, he looked down again and sighed.

"Oi, Aibou, why are you so down?"

"What are you doing here, Yi?" the groom grumbled not looking up.

His ancestor appeared next to him, seated on the rail of the balcony. "You don't need to be so grumpy...In fact, you shouldn't be! Your fiancée finally got a chest, you got married, and now you've got a kid on the way! I'd be ecstatic if I were you!"

Ren sighed again. "You're too simple to understand what having a child is going to do to our relationship."

"Oooh! I get it!" the spirit squealed. "You're pissed because you're not going to have her all to yourself like the greedy bastard you are! You're worried that the sex is gonna go down!"

"What is it with you people and sex? Am I the only man alive that thinks about more than that?"

"Um...Ren?"

"What?" he called back in an impatient tone. Then he froze and turned around. Pin-Mei stood just a few feet behind him, a look of concern still on her face. "What are you doing out here?"

She looked at the floor. "Well, you left when everyone came over and started talking about the baby...so I was worried..." She glanced up at him. "Ren...are you upset because of the baby?"

Bingo.

"No, of course not. What gave you that idea? Why would I be jealous of something like that?"

Silence.

"I never said you were."

"Erk-"

"Ren...You're...jealous...?"

"Of course he is, darling. Even the most upstanding men can become jealous when an intruder is involved- and when I say intruder I mean baby. Your father was the same way..."

"Hua, stop telling our daughter lies!"

"You tell him, bro!"

"Hua's right, Yi! You did the exact same thing!"

"Did not!"

"You most certainly did!"

"See, Zhang? I'm not lying!"

"Yes you are!"

"That's ri-"

"ALL OF YOU STOP!"

The spirits froze and looked to the groom, who was obviously low on patience and about to snap.

"All of you. Inside. Now. I'm trying. To have. A conversation. With. My wife."

The spirits trudged into the party as Pin-Mei waved to all of them. Her hand fell slowly as she turned back to Ren.

"Ren...I...I'm sorry if I pressured you into letting me get pregnant...If I had known you were going to feel like this, I would have waited...Honestly, I would have...I..."

"Stop saying stupid things."

She looked up at him.

"It's just going to take time to adjust, that's all. It's something new. You wanted a child, so I gave you one. I could have chosen to wait as well, but I didn't, so don't think that you're at fault." He turned around and placed his hands on the rail as he looked over the balcony. "Maybe I wanted this for my own selfish reasons. To prove that I'm capable of raising a child..." He gripped the banister. "...To prove that I can do it better than my father."

"I know you'll do wonderfully. You've done such a wonderful job taking care me these past few months, not to mention years."

He snapped his head up and then turned around. "Pin-Mei..."

She walked over and embraced his left arm, leaning against it. "If I didn't, I wouldn't have wanted to have children with you in the first place." She nuzzled his arm. "There are so many of your qualities that I want them to have. If I couldn't have them with you, I wouldn't want to have them at all."

Ren chuckled, almost nervously.

"What?"

"Just sounds like something Hua would say, that's all."

_Stop acting like her...I don't want you to end up like her..._

* * *

"Wow! This place is so big!"

"You say that about every country we visit."

"But it's true!"

At Pin-Mei's request, they were spending their honeymoon in the New England region of America, namely Massachusetts. Ren was thankful that it was much quieter than some of the other states, but it hadn't occurred to him until they had arrived that it was one of those states with a so-called "Chinatown" in it. Of course, Pin-Mei was dead set on going there. He was able to put it off until the second to last day of their trip, when he finally relented and took her out into the "mimic town".

"I want to go in this store!" she squealed as she looked into the shop's window.

"Go right on ahead," he said in an encouraging voice. He was indulging her, but there was no reason why _he_ had to go into these stores. Plus, there was an odd smell in each of the stores that just bothered him to no end. He watched her go inside, then leaned against the building and folded his arms.

"It's been a long time, Tao Ren,"

He looked up. "Silva? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question. This isn't exactly within walking distance of your home."

"I have my reasons, none of which I am choosing to disclose to you. Now what do you want?"

The Priest sighed. "As abrasive as ever." Yellow eyes glared at him threateningly. "Anyway, there is something of urgent matter I need to-,"

"REN! Look! They actually had something that fit me!"

Ren turned his head as Pin-Mei walked quickly out of the store.

"Nice," he said stoically as she held up a purple maternity blouse. He was used to this by now. Praise her for buying something she liked and she'd be as happy as a clam.

As she put her findings back into the shopping bag, she looked up and saw Silva. The two blinked at each other.

"Who is this?" they said in unison, pointing.

Ren sighed as he left the wall. "Alright, Pin-Mei, that's Silva, an officiant from the Shaman Fight. Silva, this is Pin-Mei, my wife."

Pin-Mei smiled. "Oh, so YOU'RE Silva. Ren mentioned you once or twice when he was telling me about the Shaman Fight. It's so nice to finally meet you." She held out her left hand, unintentionally showing off her engagement ring and wedding band to show that the scion was speaking the truth. The priest could only stare at it, dumbfounded.

"W-W-W-W-W-W-WIFE?"

"Isn't that what I said?"

The wife in question just blinked again. "'Something wrong?"

Silva quickly tried to regain control of himself. "I just didn't expect you to be able to find a mate so quickly, that's all."

Ren glared at him. "'What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

The priest ignored him and looked to the young woman standing near him. "Now, if you'd excuse us, Mrs. Tao, there is something very urgent I need to talk to Ren about."

Pin-Mei stood there for a moment with a blush. It was the first time anyone had called her that. While she was daydreaming, Ren tugged her over to him.

"She stays," he said, leaving no room for argument. "Anything you have to say to me can be said in front of her."

The native sighed. "Very well." His gaze became more intense. "Ren, I need you to come with me right away. You, along with Yoh, HoroHoro, Lyzerg, and Chocolove are needed for a very important matter. I suppose you could even call it a mission."

Ren tilted his head. "What do you mean, 'mission'?"

"The five elemental spirits have suddenly become unstable. We need you and the others to tame your respected spirits and restore the harmony between them. If you don't, the results could be-,"

"Nope. Not doing it."

"W-What?"

"You heard me. I'm on my honeymoon. I'm not dropping it because of some sudden "mission" you have. You're going to have to find someone else to take care of your problem."

"Ren! How can you say that? You're the only one who can tame the Spirit of Thunder! If you don't come the world could be thrown into chaos!"

"I'm sure it can hold on for another three months."

"What?"

"Can't you tell that my wife is six months pregnant? I'm not leaving her so close to her due date."

The two argued back and forth until Pin-Mei lightly tugged on her husband's arm. He looked down at her. Her head was bowed.

"What is it?"

"Go."

"What?"

"I said I want you to go. If it's something that only you can do...then...just go..."

He turned to face her. "No. I already promised you that I'd never leave you while you were pregnant, and I'm keeping my word. I'm not going to be like Yi."

"Please, Ren..." She looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "If they really need you that much, then please, just go."

"Are you trying to get rid of me or something?"

"No! I...I just...You're so strong now...They need you and your strength to tame the spirits...If the fate of the world really is on the line, then please, go with Silva. I'm fine going home by myself."

"Pin-Mei!"

"Please..." she whispered over and over again as she clung to his arm and sobbed into his shoulder.

He looked down at her. "Fine...I'll go."

* * *

**January 13, 2008**

* * *

Ren jumped off of Hakuoh and raced into Tao Castle at full speed. He raced up the stairs to the room he and Pin-Mei shared, but when he opened it, she wasn't there.

"Lord Ren, the delivery is taking place in the medical wing," Wen, one of Pin-Mei's maidservants, said as she passed him carrying a large pile of red towels.

"Of course!" He spun around and bolted past her, accidentally sending her to the floor, the towels surrounding her. She sighed and began picking them up.

As he ran down the steps, he tripped and found himself tumbling down the large flight of stairs. He landed on the floor with an audible thud.

"Ren, darling, are you alright?"

He lifted his head and saw his mother peering down at him. He quickly picked himself up off the floor and started sprinting past her.

"Ren, darling, you're heading in the wrong direction."

He skidded to a stop.

"The medical wing is the other way."

Ren turned on his heel and ran down the hall in the opposite direction. A few nurses were running around the halls, and he nearly collided with both. Finally, he made it to her room. He threw the door open and approached the threshold.

For a moment he just stood in the doorway, staring at her. She was laying in the hospital bed with her legs propped up. Her face told him that she was already tired, but still, she was able to smile.

"Hey..." she whispered hoarsely.

He walked over and sat in a chair next to the bed, then grasped her right hand in both of his.

"You made it, I'm so glad..."

"Of course I did, fool...Like I'd miss something like this."

"Did you finish what you had to do?" she whispered, seemingly not by choice.

He nodded. "Yes. Everything's alright now. Just forget about it."

"Oh...alright..." She tilted her head and smiled. After a moment, she reached out and touched the hair that now hung past his shoulders. "Hee...You never did get it cut. You were going to when we came back, but..."

"I didn't have time to think about something as trivial as that. I just had to get used to it."

"No barber shops on the way?"

"Don't be foolish."

Ren sighed and pulled out a hair clip. He brought some of the more troublesome pieces to the back, folded them upward, and snapped the clip into place. Pin-Mei smiled and clapped at his new skill.

"You'll have to let me braid your hair sometime."

"No, no, I won't."

"Aww...Ren, you're no fun." She started giggling, but stopped when she noticed how disgruntled he looked. "To be honest, I really like it like that. I think you should keep it like that for a while."

He looked away from her. "I'll think about it." She giggled again, amused by how different he looked.

She quieted as she heard a tapping noise. He was horrified when she placed her hand on his left thigh, stilling it. She smiled.

"You're jittery...I've never seen you like this. Are you really that nervous?"

He removed her hand from his leg and held it. "Silence."

Suddenly she squeezed his hand tightly. He looked at her face and his eyes softened slightly.

"You're in pain, aren't you?"

She said nothing, only bit her lip and nodded slowly.

"You can scream if you want."

"NO!" she yelled, making him jump. She looked up at him, her eyes full of determined passion. "I won't make a sound. I'm the wife of Tao Ren, and I will_ not_ shame myself by screaming."

Ren just stared at her. It had been so long since he had seen such an intense look in her eyes. It was obvious that despite the fact that she was, to him, helpless in her current state and had been when he left her, she had forced his family's pride on herself and made herself more independent. He wasn't daft, obviously. He knew that this was a painful process, and who knew how long she would be suffering through it. After a small sigh, he patted her hand.

"Well, if you ever feel like it, just know that I won't think less of you if you do."

She smiled weakly, then lowered her head and grit her teeth again as another wave of pain washed over her.

It wasn't long before the room was swarming with nurses, running around, getting towels, cold cloths, and other necessities. The dull roar of the women giving Pin-Mei instructions was the only sound that was audible, artfully drowning out the slight whimpers she would let out.

Ren said nothing, only whispered things directed to no one. Even he couldn't hear what he was murmuring. When it seemed as though the pain was at its greatest, he took to putting his forehead on their joined hands, as if to soothe the painful grip she had on him.

He looked up when she fell back against the pillow. Cheers and clapping filled the room as the head nurse held up the tiny baby.

"...What is it?" Pin-Mei asked facing the ceiling, her eyes closed.

"A boy."

Ren watched the smile spread across her face as she opened her eyes. She had done her job, what she had been "chosen" to do. She had given birth to an heir, and the Tao family would continue.

The nurse suddenly handed the baby to Ren in a blanket. He stared at it, almost holding it away from him. He didn't know what to do with this thing. It wasn't his area. Pin-Mei turned her head to look at it.

"He's...beautiful..." she breathed, using the curled index finger of her right hand to stroke its cheek.

He looked at her. She was positively glowing. He could see the huge amount of pride and happiness in her eyes. He almost told himself that he had never seen her happier, but quickly dismissed the thought, not wanting to be outdone by this...thing...

"Ren..."

"What?"

"No...Not you...him...His name is Ren..."

Silence.

"You're actually naming him after me?"

She looked up at him, still stroking her newborn. "Of course. I said I would, didn't I?"

_I want the boy to be just like you…I even kinda want to give him your name…and um…stuff…_

There she was with that memory again.

She let out a weak laugh before suddenly retracting her hand and biting the finger she had been using to caress her son. The nurses rushed back in and surrounded them. Ren just looked around at them, his mind blank. It was over...She had done her job...So why was she still suffering?

"What's going on?"

The nurse from before turned to him. "I don't think she's done yet."

His eyes shot open as the baby Tao squirmed in his arms. He couldn't offer her his hand again because he was holding the infant. She was truly suffering through this all over again, this time by herself.

As his son's cries echoed throughout the room, Ren looked down at the child in dismay. For the first time in years, he was lost. He had no idea what to do. Then he remembered his wife's earlier ministrations. Slowly and hesitantly, his thumb made its way over to the small, chubby cheek and gently brushed over it. Almost instantly, the tiny Tao calmed down, as if comforted by knowing that someone was there. When he went to reposition his hand, a tiny hand wrapped around his right index finger and sucked on it. Ren blinked at the little one for a few seconds, its eyes still closed.

Suddenly, the eyes opened. Tiny yellow eyes so much like his own looked right at him. As he continued to look down at the newborn, his mouth turned up ever so slightly.

_Maybe this father thing won't be so bad after all._

Just then, more cries rang out. Ren looked up to see the nurse holding another baby.

"What is it?" he asked, despite himself.

"A girl."

She laid the baby next to her mother's head. Pin-Mei turned her head slightly to look at her.

"So what is this one's name?"

She looked up at Ren, who was smiling warmly at her. Her gaze fell to the baby beside her.

"...Lien..." she whispered, her voice barely audible.

Ren gazed at the second baby. It was much bigger than the one he held in his arms.

"What a good brother Ren is..."

He looked up and at the nurse.

"Seeing as how much smaller he is, he must have given most of the food to his sister in order to make sure she would be healthy...even at his own expense." She sighed wistfully. "I can tell he's going to grow up to be a brother that takes very good care of his little sister."

Ren looked at his son, then his daughter. He smiled.

His smile faded as he looked past her.

Pin-Mei's eyes were closed.

From what he could see

she wasn't moving.


	64. When I Fall

Don't worry, an actual plot is coming. The last major one of the story. This is just a small intro plot to get ready for that one.

**Notes: "Lien" is a more feminine spelling of "Li****án", which, as you remember, is Ren's Chinese name. So both children are, in fact, named after him. (I used to think it was a different word because of the spelling, but after seeing it on numerous baby name sites, I decided that it is probably correct)**

**This takes place six years later, in 2014, making Ren and Lien six years old.**

**Remember, children, Mei Mei means "little sister".**

**Ren's returned to the tongari. Long hair is too hard to take care of. And uses too much shampoo.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Four: When I Fall**

* * *

"...and then what happened, Papa?"

"Did...Did...Did Mommy die?"

"Of course not, dumb head."

"Waaaaahhh! Papa!"

Their father sighed. "Lien, don't pick on your brother."

"...Fine."

"Good. Now apologize."

"I'm sorry, Ren."

Her brother quickly wiped his eyes and smiled. "It...It's okay." He hugged her tightly. "I love you, Mei Mei!"

His sister gave an embarrassed whimper and gently pushed him away. "So then what happened, Papa?"

Ren sat back in his chair. "Well..."

* * *

"_Pin-Mei...PIN-MEI!"_

"_Shhh!"_

_Ren looked up at the nurse in disdain, but she smiled._

"_She's sleeping."_

_He leaned toward her more closely, and could hear her subtle breathing. Definitely asleep. He leaned back in his chair and sighed._

"_Why am I not surprised?"_

_Pin-Mei didn't sleep long. Soon her children let out hungry cries, and she was forced awake. After Lien was fed, she took Ren and began nursing him as well._

"_He looks just like you," she said, a bright smile on her face. She giggled and pointed at the infant's head, where a few purple hairs were standing on end, already rebelling against the rest._

"_Lien does too," she continued. She laughed again. "I should have expected that neither of them would look much like me. Your genes are just as dominant as the rest of you!"_

_Ren smirked as he looked over at Lien, who was laying in a small cradle by the bed. A small tuff of navy blue hair sat on her head. When she had opened her eyes, they had been the same yellow as her father and brother's._

_The nurse came in. "I just wanted to check and see how everything is going," she said cheerfully._

_She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Pin-Mei and the tiny Ren together. After a moment, she dashed up to the bed, effectively shoving the elder Ren out of the way._

"_What is it?" Pin-Mei asked, taken aback by the aggressive display._

"_I'm sorry Mrs. Tao, but I need to take Ren from you. It looks like he's having a reaction to your nursing him."_

"_What are you-?"_

_But when the nurse took him from her, she saw rashes on his face and body. Small hives covered his arms._

_She froze until the nurse had turned and left the room. Her eyes wide with horror, she lunged forward, reaching out as if she could snatch her child back, but the nurse's hastened footsteps had already faded._

"_NO! GIVE HIM BACK!" she screamed._

_Ren held her back in a distanced hug._

"_Pin-Mei, if something's wrong with him then we can't do anything. The doctors are the only ones-,"_

"_I'M NOT LOSING ANOTHER ONE!" she screamed back. "I REFUSE TO!"_

_Ren stared at her. He had thought that she was over the miscarriage, but no, she had been hiding that pain for the last nine months. Even though that unborn baby had been barely a month old, it was still a child to her. Her reaction was out of pure fear - fear of having to experience that feeling of hopelessness and guilt again._

_She struggled against him. "LET ME GO BE WITH MY SON! LET GO OF ME!"_

_Ren lowered his head and held her tightly against him as she continued flailing._

"_I know you're scared," he whispered._

_She stopped._

"_I understand why. If I were in your position, I would be too...Maybe I __**am**__ a little afraid._

"_I know that as the mother, you have feelings that I can't possibly understand. I didn't go through the pregnancy – you did. But I know you're hurting."_

_He felt her put her forehead on his shoulder._

"_I promise that we'll do everything we possibly can to make sure that the baby...that Ren will be alright. I promise."_

"_Ren..."_

_For a moment he didn't know if she was talking to him or calling out for her son, but when he recognized her tone, he knew that he had put her at ease._

_She pulled away from him. Her eyes were puffy and red, and her exhaustion was more visible than ever. _

"_Go to him..."_

_He said nothing._

"_Please..."_

_He smiled slightly and kissed her. "Alright. But in exchange, you go to sleep. I won't leave until you are."_

_She nodded slowly and he gently lowered her back onto the mattress._

"_Can I have Lián?" she asked softly._

_He motioned to pick up the remaining child, but she stopped him._

"_No, I want Lián, my doll..."_

_He stared at her. "You still have that thing?"_

_She blushed. "Yeah...I slept with him every night when you were gone...It wasn't the same...but I'd rather have him here with me while the both of you are gone."_

_He nodded and retrieved the proxy plushie from their room and gave it to her. She fell asleep almost instantly. He was about to leave, but turned back when Lien started crying. Helplessly, he walked over to her crib and stuck his hand in, playing with her hands and stroking her cheek. She calmed, and he turned to leave, only to have her start crying again._

_He felt defeated. Then he remembered the other stuffed animal that had the ability to calm those who held it. He returned to his room and soon came running back._

_Panting, he stared down at her again. Slowly, he produced a tiger plushie and set it next to her. She gradually quieted down and then joined her mother in slumber. Pleased that he was able to come up with the solution on his own, he left and walked down the cold and dreary halls to the ICU._

_As he opened the door, the nurse from before was coming out. She jumped with a small shriek, then calmed herself._

"_Mr. Tao, good, you're here. I was just about to come get you. Come with me."_

_He followed her into a room where the baby Ren lay in a vented plastic box of sorts. A monitor displayed his heartbeat and an IV cord was attached to his wrist. A young doctor stood next to it. They shook hands. Ren's gaze fell on the newborn._

"_What's wrong with him?" he asked, his voice somewhere between impatience and worry._

"_I believe he's allergic to your wife's breast milk," the doctor replied. "We tested him with regular milk and we got the same reaction. He may be completely lactose intolerant."_

_Ren stared at his young clone in disbelief. How can that be? It was impossible. He was the son of Tao Ren, notorious for his love of milk. How can someone who was his mirror image live without something he loved so much?_

_He told Pin-Mei when he returned. She cried, apologizing as if it was somehow her fault. He assured her that that wasn't the case. Little Ren soon came back to them, and everything was perfect again._

* * *

"...And that's about it."

"Wow! Mom really loves us!" Ren cried, throwing his arms up in the air.

"Yeah!" Lien said joining him.

The elder Ren's eyes softened. _More than the both of you know._ He stood. "Come on, we have to get you two to school."

Lien groaned, nearly whimpered. Her long and thin ponytails, although low in the first place, seemed to sink even lower at the depressing thought of being around her classmates. Ren stiffened, a look of horror on his face.

"I-I-I need a drink!"

He ran past his father and into the kitchen. He threw open the refrigerator and searched the shelves. After messing up the shelves he could reach, he grabbed his purple bangs in anguish.

"Where is it?"

"Looking for this?"

The boy froze and slowly turned to see his father looking down at him and shaking a carton of milk. Busted.

"I-I was looking for juice, Papa! Honest!"

"Oh really? You think I was born yesterday? I know what you're up to, you little imp."

"N-No..."

"Come on."

He left the room, his son trudging slowly behind him. His fingers were suddenly grasped, and he looked down to see Ren holding onto him for dear life, his head lowered. They walked in silence to the door where Lien was waiting.

"Papa..." he said suddenly.

"What?"

"Do...Do you love me...even though I can't drink milk like you?"

Ren looked down at the child again. He was quivering. Crying.

"I do."

"Okay..."

He suddenly let go of his father and ran upstairs. Ren watched as he opened the door and snuck into his parents' room, where his mother lay sleeping as always. He shook her gently.

"Mama,"

Pin-Mei opened her eyes groggily. "What is it, sweetheart?

"I'm going to school now."

She gave him the best smile she could muster, then sat up slightly. She touched his left cheek gently as she kissed his other one.

"I love you. Have a good day. I'll see you when you get home."

He smiled, a tiny blush on his face. "O-Okay!" He turned and ran out of the room and back down the stairs. Pin-Mei stared after him.

"I know it's hard, Ren...Just keep smiling."

* * *

"What happened?"

"Um...I...I...Um..."

Pin-Mei quickly knelt in front of her son, whose left eye had been replaced with a deep bruise.

"He got ownxxorz because he didn't want to give up his lunch," Lien chimed in.

"Lien," her mother said in a threatening tone, then gave up and turned back to the small victim in front of her.

"Mama...Am...Am I a 'freak'?"

For a moment she said nothing, remembering how many times she'd had to suffer such malicious words from the ignorant masses. She remembered how the rumors had flown when she went to school with Ren for the first time. But with him there, she was only harassed when they were able to get her alone, which hadn't been very often.

"No honey, of course not. You're as normal as your father or I."

Almost angrily, she turned to her daughter.

"And what were you doing when this happened?" she cried.

Lien cringed slightly. It was one of those times when she would rather be dealing with her father. When it came to her brother, Pin-Mei would always be looking for an explanation for why Lien hadn't protected her OLDER brother. Their father wasn't so biased.

"I had a lollipop in my mouth! If they had hit me, I woulda choked on it, Mom!"

Pin-Mei sighed and scooped Ren up in her arms. "Come now, don't cry anymore, Ren. We're going to clean that eye up for you. Now smile for me." He gave her a bright smile. She mimicked him and gently kissed his swollen eye, then his forehead. "That's a good boy."

As she turned to bring him to the bathroom to get some cream, she looked at Lien again. "Lien, in this family we protect those who are close to us. That includes siblings. There were times when I had to fight for your father, so you in turn should fight for your brother. That's what love is about."

"...Yes, Mama."

"Please remember that next time Ren is in trouble."

As her mother passed her Lien clenched her fists and stomped her foot.

"And when the heck will HE help ME?" she screamed.

Pin-Mei stopped, then turned around slowly. "Your brother is as noble as your father. He'll repay any help you give him."

"Noble? Like Papa? There's no way in heck he's anything like him! Papa's the strongest in the world! He's fearless! Nothing scares him!" She pointed at the child in her mother's arms. "Ren's a dumb, stupid, wuss who can't even sit next to Papa because he'll get hives if he even SEES milk! He drinks it so he can get out of school and make me go there by myself! He's too scared to even go and exercise with Papa because he's afraid Papa will actually treat him like a boy!"

She put her hand down and squeezed her eyes shut as angry tears fell from them.

"You love him more than me! I know you do! You were probably upset when I was born because you just wanted a boy! Just admit it! If I had gotten sick like Ren had, you would've been happy!"

"That's not true, Lien!" her mother said sternly, trying to keep herself from screaming. "I wanted both of you!"

"Then why don't you carry ME around like that? You ha-"

She stopped when she felt a hand on her head.

"That's enough, Lien."

Lien looked up to see her father, who left her and walked over to his distressed spouse. He took his son from her and placed him on the ground.

"I'll take care of Ren. You go talk to Lien," he told her as he led their son upstairs.

She nodded slowly as he passed her. After the boys had left, she and Lien stared at each other. Pin-Mei fell to her knees and held out her arms.

"Lien, come here and let me hold you."

The small girl stood rigidly, not moving.

"No."

Pin-Mei swiftly walked over to her and picked her up. "I've got you now, my pretty," she said in a cackly voice.

Lien sighed, annoyed. "Mom, you know you can't sound like the Witch."

"Oh really? I would have thought that you were convinced that I _am_ the witch, with you telling me I hate you."

"Well...I..."

"I know, honey. We all get jealous. Even me. I'm just sorry that I was the cause of yours."

She took her to the living room and sat her on the couch.

"I love the both of you equally. I just have more of a reason to worry about Ren," she continued. "When he comes home with a black eye and you don't, who do you think I'm going to worry about?"

The six year-old stared at her feet. "I guess you're right..."

"Your brother loves you a lot, you know. If nothing else, the one way he's like your father is that both of them are very passionate people. I'll do anything for the people I love. Your father is the same. Ren is slowly becoming that way as well. The question is, will you also be like that?"

"I'm...not sure."

She smiled. "There's no rush to find out who you are. It took your father thirteen years to find himself. Me, fourteen, maybe more. Take your time so you'll like the person you turn out to be."

"Ren is probably himself already..."

"What?"

Lien clenched her fists as she became upset again. "He's so smart. When there's only one perfect score in the class, it's always his. And he hugs me and tells me he loves me when I call him names...He...he just makes me so mad!"

Pin-Mei looked at her sympathetically and placed her hand on the small girl's shoulder. "That doesn't mean he knows who he is. As you grow up, you're going to change in the most extreme ways. Don't count yourself out just yet. Just try to be nicer to your brother every now and then and be patient with him. Your father is trying to guide him and make him the best man he can be...I'm just getting in the way."

"Is that why he makes Ren walk everywhere he goes and makes you put him down?"

"...That's right." She put on her Ren face and dropped her voice. "'He'll turn out to be a pansy if you keep carrying him around like he's a cat or a puppy,' or so he says." They laughed.

When the laughter subsided, Lien looked up at her mother.

"Mama, how much do you love Papa?"

Pin-Mei smiled. "I can't tell you that."

Lien blinked. "Why not?"

"Because when you love someone, it's nearly impossible to express it in words."

"That was...mushy..."

"You asked a mushy question."

She looked at her shoes again. "I guess..."

* * *

"Take this," Ren said as he handed his son the plastic Kwan Dao. "I'm teaching you how to use this today."

The boy took it, his hands quivering. "B-B-But what if I cut my head off?"

Ren took it back from him and rubbed the "blade" against his son's wrist for a few moments. "Do you see any blood?"

"...No..."

"See? I wouldn't do something that I know would hurt you. Trust me more."

"Yeah...Sorry, Papa..."

"Don't apologize, just don't be so scared."

"Okay..."

But as they began, it was plain to see that the younger Ren didn't share the same talents as the older one. As with Pin-Mei, the plastic Kwan Dao met the ground many times. Even after an hour of practice the little boy could hardly do a simple twirl with the weapon.

Ren watched him, trying not to let himself feel disappointed. He had started learning the Kwan Dao at an earlier age, but even so, to see his son struggling was just a little disheartening. After the plastic blade was dropped once more, he put his hand on the child's shoulder.

"That's enough. We'll start again tomorrow."

He took both weapons and placed them in the armory, then the two made their way towards the house.

"Um...Father?"

"What?"

"Do...Do you think I can be as good at the Kwan Dao as you are someday?"

He paused. It may be a lie, but if it would get him to keep practicing, it couldn't hurt that much.

"If you keep practicing with me every day then I don't see why not."

His doppelganger looked at the ground and smiled. "Cool."

* * *

A few nights later, Lien burst into her parents' room, a horrified look on her face. She got a running start from the doorway and jumped onto their bed, landing in between them. Ren awoke with a start, his eyes frantically searching the room before they fell on the small girl with a navy blue nightgown that was clinging to his arm, quivering.

"Lien, what is it?"

"It's Ren! It's like he's having a nightmare! He just keeps screaming and swinging that sword-stick around!"

Without listening to another word, Ren leaped out of the bed and ran to his children's room. The door was still open from when Lien had escaped and he could see the smaller version of himself swinging the blade about.

"Ren!" he called out to him.

The boy stopped and tensely turned to face him. His eyes were wild with fear, even more than his sister's had been.

"I won't do it, Father..." he whispered. "I won't kill them...No matter how much you tell me it's the right thing to do...I...I WON'T BE LIKE YOU!"

Ren just stared at him. He had never told him anything of the sort, nor had he or Pin-Mei ever told the children about the person he used to be. There was no rationale for him saying such things.

"Ren, you must have heard me wrong," he said as he slowly made his way over to him. "I would never tell you to kill someone. Your mother and I always tell you and Lien that you can't hurt other people. We-"

"LIAR!" the younger Ren screamed. "When those boys were holding me up against the wall, you told me to push them down and strangle them until I had squeezed every last breath out of them! You told me it was the only way to make the suffering stop!" He looked nauseous. "Even now, you told me that if I killed Lien I wouldn't have to deal with the pain she causes me when she calls me all those names!"

"You know that's not true," his father said as he approached him. "I've always told you that it's your job to protect your sister."

The blade was swung in front of him. "You just want to kill Mother and Lien...Just...Just like you did all those other innocent people...You...MURDERER!"

Before either could do one more thing, Pin-Mei slid between them and gently pressed a tag on her son's forehead. The characters on it flashed as his eyes widened for a moment, then slowly closed as his body went limp in her arms.

"Ren...what do you think...?"

"I don't know," he said quickly, trying to push the young boy's words from his mind. He looked down and saw his wife's left hand gently touching the bottom of the back of their son's red silk pajamas, her fingers curled tentatively under the hem. "If you need to in order to reassure yourself, go ahead. I won't see it as a sign that you don't trust me."

She inhaled as she closed her eyes and quickly lifted the shirt. When she opened them, she heaved a sigh of relief.

His back was bare.

"I'm sorry..." she said quickly. "I just..."

"It's alright," Ren reassured, touching her head.

The Tao family emblem. A symbol of hatred that would never fade. After hearing her son's words, Pin-Mei had been consumed by the irrational fear that someone had carved it into his back without her knowing, causing him to speak such heated words to the man he openly admired and aspired to be. After the twins' birth, Ren had promised her that he wouldn't put their children through the agony of such a ritual, that he wouldn't lock such dark feelings inside them. Deep down, although she had said that she wanted her son to be just like his father, she never wanted him to suffer in the ways Ren had.

"I don't know what's caused this, but at the moment there isn't much we can do," Ren continued as he watched Pin-Mei place the sleeping child back into bed.

"He...He's been like this for a while..." Lien said reluctantly from the doorway. "But...he never got out of bed or anything. He just covered himself with a pillow as he cried...I just told him to shut up...that I didn't wanna listen to him."

Ren stared at her. "For how long?"

"Since the kids started making fun of us last year."

"Six months...And you didn't say anything?"

"I'm sorry, Papa! He just always cries! I never thought it was weird or anything!"

Pin-Mei silenced her and tucked her back into bed, then the couple returned to their room. Ren laid awake, staring at the ceiling, the situation swirling in his mind, trying to make sense of it all. Pin-Mei suddenly flopped to his side and clung to him.

"What are you thinking about?"

His eyes shifted toward her, then back to the ceiling. He wrapped his arm around her.

"If hatred is supposed to be somewhere, but is supposedly barred from that place, do you think that hatred still finds a way inside because it doesn't know what else to do?"

She blinked. "What?"

"Nothing."

She blinked again, then giggled and snuggled against him, kissing him. "Thanks for letting me have my way again."

He smirked. "You forget, I'm naming this one."

* * *

**Five months later...**

* * *

"Lien! You...You..."

"I finally stepped in." She smiled weakly.

Pin-Mei gently touched the bandage on Lien's cheek before bursting into tears and holding her close.

"Lien...I never meant that I wanted you to get hurt also..." She sobbed. As if remembering something, she looked up. "Where's Ren?"

Lien's smiled vanished. She stared at the floor. "He's...coming..."

No sooner had she spoken did Ren appear, his bangs hiding his eyes. Pin-Mei reached out to him as he walked by.

"Ren...Are you..."

"I'm fine, Mother," he said in a low voice.

Her eyes widened as she saw dots of red on the yellow blazer of his school uniform. _That can't be...blood?_

The phone rang and she ran to get it, still staring at her son as he calmly hung up the stained jacket.

"Hello?"

"Yes...Um...Is this Mrs. Tao?"

"Yes, who's calling please?"

"Um...Well...This is Ms. Yin...Ren and Lien's teacher...Um...I need you and your husband to come in for a conference with me and the Chi family...It's about Ren...there was a...problem today..."


	65. Let Tenderness Freeze

**Notes: ****The title is a lyric from Angelzoom's "Fairyland".**

**Okay, we have a few new Chinese words. YAY! I just hope my dictionary won't fail me...again... **

**The teacher's given name, Ke-Pa, means to be fearful. As you can tell, she stutters a lot.**

**The boy Ren "mutilated" is named Suōshǐ, which means to instigate. If you don't know that word, you can compare it to kicking a beehive – you do something to someone else that makes them react in a negative way. ****Suōshǐ has flunkies! Yay! Their names are**** Zhui, Sui, and Zhe, which, according to my dictionary make up the word "follower". -nods-**

**Mu Qin is "mother". Chibi-Ren says it in this chapter as a way of being formal with Pin-Mei. I may or may not begin to use it regularly depending on how I feel. I mean, I still use Nii-Sama, which is Japanese. -sigh-**

**I was disappointed when I looked up Chinese currency. I was counting on it having coins, but the Yuan, which I am confident is the official currency there, is all dollars. Paper. Or at least I didn't see any coins. Well, I got confused because they had about two or three different currencies, one for each part of China, and I just gave up. This is what I get for being American. -sighs-**

**Now, we can say that the children are around 7 and 8.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Five: Let Tenderness Freeze**

* * *

"I-I'm sorry to call the both of you here like this, Mr. and Mrs. Tao, b-but Mr. and Mrs. Chi insisted that we have this conference..." a bespectacled woman with bangs and wavy shoulder-length black hair said nervously as she frantically sifted through a filing cabinet.

A middle aged couple was already sitting on a couch opposite the one Ren and Pin-Mei would be sitting in. An armchair was between the ends of them where Ms. Yin would be sitting. Ren looked them over. The man's hair was combed over, not to say that he was balding, but there was a certain haughtiness in it. His wife had slightly graying hair which was held back in a tight bun. They wore formal clothes and gold jewelry. Obviously rich, obviously ignorant.

"Ke-Pa, leave the files and let us find out about the parents of the boy who mutilated our son," Mr. Chi said impatiently.

"Mu...Mutilated?" Pin-Mei whispered listlessly as she almost fell into her seat. Ren caught her and lowered her slowly.

"N-Not really, Mrs. Tao! It was just a bloody nose and a broken arm...Of-of course there were some bruises, b-but Suōshǐ is alright..."

"To you he is!" his mother cried, bursting into what seemed to be fake tears. "Our child is too afraid to go to school because of their little monster! Preying on our poor son like that! Why would you allow such a boy to come back to school?"

Pin-Mei's eyes had widened at "monster". Of all the things she could have said, to choose a word that was often used to strike fear into the hearts of children was something she hadn't been prepared for. The moment Ren sat next to her, she clung to him as if to tell him that she wanted to go home, that she wasn't ready for this. But she had begged to come. At more than six months pregnant, she shouldn't be put through this sort of stress, father and son had reasoned. Still, she had pleaded with her husband to allow her to accompany him in the effort to defend their son. He ultimately relented.

The younger Ren was sitting outside in a chair under the supervision of the assistant headmaster. Suōshǐ, a boy with spiky dark brown hair, was sitting in another chair less than ten feet away, his arm in a sling. While he glared at him, his "attacker" just stared straight ahead.

"You're gonna get it," he said. "My parents are gonna rip yours apart."

Ren's head lowered. "Mu Qin..." he whispered.

"Let's just hope the assistant headmaster can stop him if he tries to attack my poor, defenseless son again out there..."

"He...He wouldn't!" Pin-Mei cried. Her son's smiling face flashed in her mind.

"_Mama! It hurts!" Ren cried as he held his leg, his knee bleeding. _

_Pin-Mei stooped down and cleaned it, then put a bandage over it. "How's that?"_

"_It...It still stings!"_

_She smiled at him, then kissed the bandage. "That should help."_

_He smiled. "Yeah! It feels better already!"_

_She stood. "I'm glad." She turned to walk away, but there was a tug on her skirt. She turned back around. "What is it, sweetheart?"_

_His head was turned, trying to hide a blush. "It still hurts a little...um...Will you carry me?"_

"Ren is a kind child! He really is! He would never hurt anyone else for any reason! He doesn't even fight with his sister! He—!"

"Oh, so you're suggesting that my son broke _his own_ arm?"

Pin-Mei froze and then recoiled, seeking solace in Ren's arm once again. He looked down at her with soft eyes, but offered no kind words.

The teacher sat down, seemingly pleased with herself. "H-Here! I found them!" She cried holding up a folder. She opened it and sifted through some papers. Finding one, she held it out for the Chi family to see. "As you can see, Ren is a very good student. He has top marks in all subjects with seemingly no effort at all." She produced another page and showed it as well. "He...His record is immaculate, never having any incidents before yesterday in which he was the instigator, so I hope you can understand Mrs. Tao's disbelief at the situation."

Pin-Mei glowed with pride. Lien was average, taking an interest in drawing and music, which she loved, but the fact that Ren, like his father, excelled in academics tickled her whenever the subject was brought up.

"It's always the quiet ones," Mr. Chi muttered.

Her smile broke as she looked up at her husband, her eyes pleading with him to say something.

"What about Suōshǐ's record?" he asked calmly.

Ke-Pa adjusted her glasses and looked through another folder. "A-Average marks..." She flipped a page. "S-Six incidents last term..."

"Not exactly a model student, wouldn't you say, Chi?" Ren said with stoic sarcasm.

"I can see where his horrible attitude comes from,"

"Like father, like son, right? I believe it can go both ways."

"You insolent-"

Pin-Mei touched his arm. "Please...Don't make things worse..."

He exhaled. "I'm not. He's the one having a conniption."

"I should have known it was a young couple..." the Chi woman whispered to her husband. "Children raising children..."

Ren's eyes narrowed. "Say that again?"

She looked at him with scornful eyes. "Are you what this generation would call a 'knocked up couple'?"

Ren tilted his head with an angry grin. "You'll have to explain that."

The elder woman pursed her lips. "You know. Two people have a one night stand, but then the girl gets pregnant, so they become a couple for the sake of the child, or in this case children." She surveyed Pin-Mei's pregnant figure with disgust. "And now you wish to bring another mistake into the world. If you young people would stop your promiscuity then we would have less rambunctious children in our schools and more productive ones."

Pin-Mei seemed ready to retaliate, but Ren but an arm up to block her.

"Chi," he said in a low voice. "You would do well to teach your wife to bite her tongue. It could get her into trouble some day."

Mr. Chi snickered. "Is that a threat?"

Ren sneered, his eyes flashing. "No, just some 'friendly' advice."

Ke-Pa looked back and forth between them, unsure of what to do. "L-Let's bring the boys in a-and have them each tell their side of the story," she said finally.

So she walked over to the door and had them come in. Suōshǐ ran to his mother and hugged her. Ren walked over to the couch and calmly sat next to Pin-Mei, making no motion to embrace her in any way. Trying to hold back tears, she held him close to her, causing his eyes to widen.

"I...I don't care if you really did this," she whispered. "You're still my son...and I still love you."

He looked up at her with pitied eyes, as if she were the child and not he.

"Ren, tell us what happened," his father said flatly, not wanting to waste time with small details.

"NO! Suōshǐ is going to go first!" the other boy's mother cried. She turned to her son. "Go on sweety, just tell us the truth. We'll make sure that little devil over there doesn't attack you again."

Suōshǐ waited until he thought no one was watching and stuck the tip of his tongue out at his opponent. Then he looked fearful.

"I was on my way to lunch when I accidentally bumped into Lien-,"

"Who's Lien?" Mr. Chi asked.

"My sister," Ren snapped, his eyes instantly hardening.

Suōshǐ's parents shot him a death glare, as if to say that they had expected as much from him. Pin-Mei gently stroked his hair as she leaned down to whisper in his ear.

"Honey, you'll get your chance to speak...but for now it would be best if you let Mama and Papa do the talking...We don't want you to get into any more trouble." She kissed his head.

He looked up at her again with regretful eyes.

"ANYWAY, I bumped into Lien and she fell on the ground. I was GOING TO pick her up and apologize, and maybe even give her some snack bar money. Then, outta NOWHERE," he pointed at Ren. "THIS IDIOT comes up and starts beating the snot outta me! I was like WHOA! I was GONNA apologize and stuff if he hadn't come and done that! He was laughing the whole time, too! He was teasing me as he snapped my arm, and said he was going to yank the whole thing right off!"

Pin-Mei wanted to say something. She knew that none of this was true - she hoped it wasn't - but she had already told Ren to be quiet, and to go against herself would be setting a bad example, at least in her eyes. All she could do was clench her free fist.

"He said he was going to go after MY little sister and-"

"That's not true! Ren would never-!"

Everyone stared at the young woman, up from her chair, an uncharacteristic anger on her face. She looked around, realized what she had done, and sat back down pretending to fix her glasses in order to hide her reddened face.

"I-I'm very sorry for that...I d-don't know what got into me..." the teacher whispered.

The Chi parents wasted no time in jumping down her throat.

"How would you know that? Were you there?" the mother demanded.

"N-No...I...I..."

"You're playing favorites with this brute, aren't you? Defending him after what he's done to our son?"

"I...I..."

"We want an answer, Ke-Pa. Your job may depend on it. We'll make sure."

She was practically in tears. "I...I..." She put her face in her hands and broke down.

"Here."

She stopped and looked up to see her student's yellow eyes staring back at her. His hand twitched a little in order to get her attention, and she looked down to see a handkerchief in it. Looking back at him, she slowly took the soft cloth from him and began dabbing her eyes with it. He just stared at her, emotionless.

"I appreciate you trying to defend me, Ms. Yin, but people like this won't give in to words as light as yours." He briefly placed his hand on her arm. "But thank you." He gave her a small smile similar to his father's.

Then his eyes became cold again as he looked to the other family. "But what she said was the truth. Everything your son just said was a lie. I had my reasons for hurting him."

* * *

"_Ren, come on! If we don't get to the cafeteria, like, NOW, then the line for the snack bar is going to be WICKED long, and I'm going to be mad. Mom FINALLY gave me money for it, so I wanna be able to get something!"_

"_S-Sorry!" He turned to Ms. Yin. "Um...Can I go...?" _

_She smiled and took the books he had been putting away for her. "Of course, Ren. Go on."_

"_Thanks!" He scrambled to the doorway where Lien had been tapping her foot. She glared at him. "Sorry! I'm really sorry!"_

_She rolled her eyes and walked out. "Just come on, already."_

_He followed her. "Thanks for reminding me," he said as he reached into his pocket._

_She looked over at him. "What?"_

_He held up a shiny coin. "Ta-da!"_

"_Where'd you get that?"_

_He beamed. "Papa gave it to me last night after training."_

"_So you finally realized that he wouldn't disown you if you asked...Nice job."_

_Ren blushed. Lien had had no trouble asking Pin-Mei for money, she just didn't give it to her until now because she wanted her to earn it first. Ren's project had been to ask his father for money, something he was very reluctant to do. He loved him, but that didn't change the fact that he intimidated him._

"_But at least you might be on your way to growing a backbone." She gave him a friendly slap on the back. She grinned deviously. "Ooh, was that muscle? You getting all ripped because you're out practicing with Papa?"_

_Ren could see her hands reaching around. "No! Stop!"_

_Too late. She startled tickling him all over._

"_Is the muscle here? Here? HERE? Or is it ALL OVER?"_

_He couldn't help laughing. "S-Stop! Stop, Lien!" He twitched and the coin flew from his hands. "No!"_

_She stopped, allowing him to chase it. Lien watched as a shoe stomped on the coin to halt it and Ren stopped dead in his tracks. He slowly looked up at the boy who had stopped it. The boy picked up the coin and inspected it._

"_S-Suōshǐ__? C-Can I have my coin back, p-please?" He was absolutely quivering. He already knew that his coin was his no more._

"_Geez Renny, I dunno. This coin kinda scuffed my shoe..."_

_Ren cocked his head. "Where?"_

_Suōshǐ__ grinned as he lifted his shoe. "Can't you see it right here?" He motioned for his victim to bring his face closer so he could get a better look. "Just a little closer..."_

"_I still can't see it..."_

"_Lemme bring it closer to you!"_

_Just as __Suōshǐ__ kicked his leg up, Lien grabbed her brother by the shoulder and practically threw him behind her. She turned to the boy._

"_Give my brother back his coin," she said fiercely._

"_No."_

"_Any reason?"_

"_Dun't feel like it."_

"_Crappy reason."_

"_Whatcha gonna do about it, witch girl? Curse me with a tag?"_

"_No. This."_

_Ren looked up just in time to see his sister swing her arm back and slap the boy across the face. _

_The entire hall froze. This girl who along with her brother could be considered the __**least**__ popular kids in school, had just slapped the __**most**__ popular. Everyone watched __Suōshǐ__, who was obviously in shock._

"_Wow," he said finally. "That takes guts, I'll give ya that. Surprised me."_

_Lien watched as three taller boys came up from behind him._

"_I've got my own surprises."_

"_Oh poo," she mumbled._

_She tried to run back to Ren in an effort to run away, pulling him behind her, but one of the boys grabbed her and threw her on the ground. Lien grabbed her head in pain as another boy grabbed her collar and lifted her up._

"_You probably got your witch cooties on him, freak."_

"_Cooties aren't real. Papa said so," Lien said defiantly._

"_Your 'Papa' is a loon," the boy declared._

"_My Papa can beat your papa any day of the week!"_

_He frowned and kneed her in the stomach. Her brother watched with wide eyes._

"_Lien!" he whimpered. _

_He ran up, seemingly trying to help detach the boy from her. One of the other boys grabbed him and shoved him to the ground, forcing him to land on his stomach. He tried to get up, but the boy sat on his back. Desperately, he clawed at the tile floor, trying to grab onto something would give him even the slightest chance to reach his sister._

"_Look at him squirm," __Suōshǐ __said laughing. He walked over and put his foot under the boy's chin and tilted it up. "Aww, look guys, he's crying."_

"_Please...just let her go..." Ren whispered._

_The bully laughed again. "We will, in a few minutes." He turned to the boy holding Lien. "Punch-bag her."_

_The boy grinned and punched her in the stomach. Ren watched helplessly, his eyes still wide with fear. He looked about the hall. Kids had stopped and were now staring at the scene before them._

"_PLEASE! SOMEONE GET A TEACHER!" he screamed._

_They all just turned their heads and walked away, not wanting to get involved. He lowered his head, not knowing what else to do._

"_You," __Suōshǐ__ said talking to the remaining henchman, "Hold his head up. Make him watch what he got his stupid sister into."_

_Ren's head was forced up, but he shut his eyes._

"_Keep 'em open or we'll hit her harder."_

_He hurriedly opened his eyes. As soon as he did, he wanted to close them again. The boy was holding Lien to the ground, punching her stomach._

_'No...Just...Just stop it! Why...Why do we have to suffer? What did we do? WHY?' Ren thought helplessly._

_**Do you want them to leave you alone?**_

_'Yes...more than anything. I just want to save my sister...'_

_**I can help with that, you know.**_

_'I...I don't want your help! I won't be like you!'_

_**So you want her to die?**_

_'NO! But I don't want them to either! I know that you'll kill them!'_

_**Everything has a price. The price for your cowardness may be your sister's life.**_

_'No...NO! I don't want to lose her! I can't! My parents need her! I need her!'_

_**Well, either let me help you, or she'll surely die...I can already feel her life diminishing...**_

_'No...They wouldn't kill her! They might beat her up, but they wouldn't KILL her!'_

_**Such naivety. Look at them. They want the both of you dead and out of their sight. Those that turned away from helping you feel the same...**_

_'Ugh...I...I feel sick...'_

_**Indeed...humans are such vile and cruel creatures...For you to have to struggle so hard to live...It's so unfair, Ren. So unfair...**_

_'It's unfair...Why is it only the two of us who have to suffer like this?'_

_**Like I've been telling you for over a year...I can help you...Just let me borrow your body...I'll make you stronger...I promise...Then I'll help you get revenge for all the pain these people have caused you...**_

_'I...I don't know...'_

_**I was the one who made your father strong...You want to be just like him, don't you?**_

_'I...I do...but...'_

_**You want to save her, don't you?**_

_'I do...I really do...but...I...'_

"_Hey look!"_

_Ren snapped out of his mental conversation and focused on the subject at hand._

"_Dude, how hard did you punch her?"_

_His eyes zeroed in on his sister's face. Blood was trailing from her mouth. He watched one drop hit the immaculate tiles of the hall floor._

_Something inside him snapped._

_'I'll do it...I'LL DO IT! I'LL DO ANYTHING! JUST SAVE LIEN!'_

_There was a low sneer._

_**Of course.**_

"_See that, Renny? That's what happens when you mess with us. Guess she's learned her lesson. C'mon, guys. I'm hungry."_

_The boy got off of Ren's back and the other let go of his face. Ren's head drooped as his bangs covered his eyes. A devilish grin slowly formed as he picked himself up off the ground. _

_Suōshǐ__ stopped as he heard a body hit the floor. _

"_Um...__Suōshǐ__?" the boy who had been holding Ren's face said nervously. There was a gagging sound._

_The leader snapped his head back to look at him. "What the fudge is it, Sui? Didn't you hear me say I was hun-"_

_He stopped._

_Sui was on his back, Ren straddling his stomach, his hands grasping the boy's throat. __Suōshǐ__'s eyes widened. Ren looked up and let the boy go, allowing him to fall unconscious. __Suōshǐ__ looked past him and saw Zhui on the ground. He backed up nervously._

"_What...what the heck...? Ren...What did you do?"_

_Ren smirked. "I only gave them what they've been asking for ever since you all started targeting us." He raised his head, revealing cold eyes filled with blood-lust. "Now I believe it's only right that I give you the same thing..."_

"_Z-Z-Z-ZHE!" __Suōshǐ__ screamed._

_The boy appeared in front of him, but as he charged, Ren grabbed his throat and flipped him over, knocking him out as he hit the floor. He turned to the remaining boy._

"_It's your turn." _

_Suōshǐ__ backed up nervously. "N-No! Ren, please...don't! I'm sorry, dude! I really am!"_

_Ren sneered. "Sorry? Sometimes apologies are just too late."_

_Suōshǐ__ screamed as he turned and tried to run away. He didn't get far. Ren grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer, then grabbed the other wrist with the boy's back to him. He placed his foot on his former attacker's back, then began pulling on his wrists as he put harsh pressure on his foot._

_Pitiful screams left the boy as the pressure increased._

"_STOP IT! YOU'RE HURTING ME!"_

"_Sure, just a second..."_

_SNAP_

"_Let's see...which one was that?"_

_Ren shook the left arm, then the right. The boy screamed again. _

"_The right one. That's your dominate hand, isn't it? How appropriate. Now you can have the same helpless feeling I've had all this time." He threw him to the ground. "But no more." He looked down and saw his coin on the ground. He stooped and picked it up. "See? If you had just given it back to me in the first place, we wouldn't be in this position."_

_He closed his eyes as he slipped the coin into the pocket of his blazer. They opened slowly as he gazed down at the boy with an expression of mixed disgust and amusement. He grasped __Suōshǐ__'s throat and lifted him. Their eyes met. __Suōshǐ__ quivered as he stared into Ren's cold yellow eyes. They had never been like that before. They used to be wide and innocent, teary most of the time._

"_Should I kill you right here and now to make sure that you never bother me again?"_

"_N-No! Don't! Please, I'm begging you!"_

"_I don't know..." The hand tightened. "Oh, sorry. My hand tends do that when I'm thinking..."_

"_Ren!"_

_Ren looked behind him see Lien leaning against the wall, her face still bloody._

"_Ah, Lien...Isn't this wonderful? This will teach them to leave us alone, don't you agree?"_

_Lien stared at him. "Ren...Papa told us that we should never hurt another person...He told us that it's wrong...We have no right to hurt them..."_

_He glared at her. "So we should do nothing when they hurt us?"_

"_Ma...Mama said that we can't change other people. Don't you remember that? When we went home crying when the teasing started? She said we can't change others, but we can change ourselves! We can show them that we don't need their hatred!"_

_He smirked and shook his head. "Lien, sometimes worthless humans need to be put in their place. I'm doing just that. I'm avenging you, dear sister."_

_She stared at him. "You...You're not my brother..."_

_His eyes widened. "What did you say?"_

"_YOU'RE NOT MY NIISAMA!"_

_A certain light returned to his eyes as he dropped the bully, who had by now been coughing up blood. Teachers rushed in soon enough to see Ren's hands on the boy, and they seized him._

* * *

"How...How can you talk about such a violent act so casually?" Mrs. Chi whispered. "You attacked our son, yet you speak of it with such a placid tone!"

"Ren...Why...?" Pin-Mei whispered. Her hands covered her face.

"Ren," his father said, "I understand you wanting to avenge Lien, but you went too far. They didn't break any of her bones, but you broke his. That's not a fair trade."

He squinted his eyes as his son glared back at him, then turned again.

"I'm sorry," he said to his victim.

The boy snapped his head away. "You should be, you stinkin' shaman."

"Dear, don't antagonize the animal," his mother cooed, her hand running through his hair.

"He's not an animal," Pin-Mei said suddenly, her hands falling. "It was your son who instigated this, and who's been making my children's lives a living HELL this past year! If anything, YOUR son is the animal. This is just one occurrence where my son acted, but do you know how many times I've had to watch my precious children, my flesh and blood, come home with cuts and bruises and black eyes?" There were tears in her eyes. "TOO MANY! AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF I LET **YOU** TALK ABOUT **MY **LITTLE BOY LIKE THAT!_"_

The room was staring at her. She turned her attention to the boy. "You are going to give a heartfelt apology to Ren, and you are going to mean it. If you refuse, then God have mercy on your soul because I'll break your other arm to beat it out of you."

The Chi family stared at her, the parents finally beginning to accept the role their son had played.

"D-Do as Mrs. Tao says, Suōshǐ," the father said.

The boy nodded slowly, his eyes wide, and looked at Ren. "I...I'm sorry for all those times I made fun of you and Lien...P-Please forgive me."

"Apology accepted," Ren said, his voice still placid.

In the silence that followed, the older Ren surveyed the opposing family.

"We'll pay for a third of the medical bills with our sincerest apologies for your son getting what was coming to him."

"T-Thank you..." the other father said.

He was told the total and he divided it in his mind, then whipped out a checkbook and scribbled down the amount. He folded it and handed it to Mr. Chi.

"Well, I wish the three of you luck in sorting out your problems because you surely have a lot of them. We'll do our best to make sure that the next time Ren needs to retaliate he doesn't break any bones, and you make sure your son stays away from ours." He looked to Ms. Yin, who was dumbfounded. "Thank you for calling us so we could sort this out." He nudged Ren.

"I apologize for any inconvenience I caused you," the boy said, as if he had been trained.

"N-Not at all," she replied. She touched his shoulder. "Y-You know I enjoy having you a-as a student."

They parted. When the Tao family arrived at home, Pin-Mei went into her and Ren's room and locked herself inside, sobbing. Ren took his son outside to train. Before they started, he sat him on the rock his wife had occupied years before, his voice low.

"If you ever upset your mother like that again, you'll regret it," he said. "She shouldn't have been there in the first place. She's more than six months pregnant, and she doesn't need this sort of stress. If you needed help, you should have come home and told us that things had gotten really bad and that we needed to intervene, and we would have taken it from there." He grasped the child's right arm. "Don't you EVER upset her like that again. EVER."

His son looked up at him. One eye seemed encased with fear, the other apathetic. "Yes, Father."

"Good. Now come on, we need to get started."

As his son picked up his Kwan Dao, he glared at his father.

_**You'll regret tossing me aside. I'll use this body to prove it.**_

* * *

**Two months later...**

* * *

Ren's whole demeanor had changed. He wasn't as sweet, he didn't smile as much, he didn't cry. He put all of his concentration into training with his father. He had started working out with him also, gaining a small amount of muscle. Both Pin-Mei and Lien looked at him with longing eyes, wondering where the boy they knew had gone. The eyes that answered theirs were cold, devoid of emotion.

One night, Lien woke to her brother shaking her shoulder. She groggily turned over. "What?"

In the darkness, she saw her brother's yellow eyes glowing. There was also the deadly shine of a Kwan Dao blade. As he raised it, she momentarily saw his eyes soften as a tear fell from them.

"Run."


	66. The Tao Who Believed She Could Fly

Yes, Pin-Mei's pregnant. Yes, this is the last child. I draw the line at three. Pin-Mei herself would probably stop at around eight or ten. Ren would use children born fourth and on as target practice when going through his Kwan Dao forms. -nods- -is called by DSS-

**Notes: You may be wondering why Pin-Mei is using tags now. Well, she never got another main spirit since Ma-Ying was extinguished, so like Jun, she chose tags instead. She just didn't get a kyonshii to go with them. And of course Jun could still mop the floor with her if they were to ever face off. I'm also just acting like Jun chose to stay with Pyron and wasn't sent off to be married. (Honestly, can you see her with anyone else?)**

**I don't know if Ran can actually do this, but to be in the Tao family she has to have _some_ sort of power, ne?**

**Regretfully, since the Ainu language is on the decline, I couldn't find a list of Ainu names. Upsetting. But I was fortunately able to find a list of random Ainu words. I chose "Seta" which means "dog".**

**A kendama is a Japanese toy where you try to get a ball, attached to a string, to land on a pin with the flick of your wrist. This is much like the "ball and cup" game in America. If you've played **_**Tales of Symphonia**_**, it's the weapon that Genis uses.**

"**Nakama" is a Japanese word for an extremely close friend. More than a best friend, more than a comrade or ally. This person is with you through thick and thin, and you would risk your life for them. Some opt not to translate this word into English, citing that it has a much deeper meaning than any other word could describe.  
**

**Most children go through a stage where they say that they are going to marry their opposite sex parent.**

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Six: The Tao Who Believed She Could Fly**

* * *

Ren's eyes shot open as he heard Lien's scream. He sat up in bed, gently pushing Pin-Mei off of him. She looked up, groggily wiping her eyes.

"Ren, come back to bed," she said, reaching out to him as he motioned to stand. She grabbed his hand, but he just touched it lightly so as not to seem cruel and just swat it away, then took slow steps toward the door.

He heard glass breaking, then running. As the steps got closer and louder Ren reached for his Kwan Dao next to the window.

Lien burst into the room. She then slammed the door shut and locked it, first with the doorknob, then with the small chain to further block it from opening. Tears streaming down her face, she ran and jumped into Ren's arms, who quickly dropped his weapon in order to receive her. He was astonished at how much she was shaking. Her eyes were wide, and she was crying inconsolably.

"Lien, what the heck is going on?" he asked her.

"It...It's Ren..." she whispered. She stopped.

"What about Ren?"

"He...He's trying to kill me,"

Ren looked at Pin-Mei, their eyes meeting. He didn't know if she was thinking the same thing he was, that she knew what was causing this. But he _did_ know what she was thinking about their current situation.

_He's turning out just like you._

He looked away from her, shutting his eyes tight. He didn't want to revisit those days, that other life he had lived. The King of Spirits had pardoned him; he didn't need to think about his past mistakes anymore. Those awful memories hadn't been plaguing his dreams like they occasionally would in the months before he was finally granted penance. Things were different now. He had a wife, a son, a daughter; all of whom he loved dearly. He had no need for those feelings of hatred anymore. He was powerful on his own.

He absentmindedly rubbed Lien's left arm in an effort to calm her, but she let out a sharp whimper. He looked at his hand. It was covered with blood. He looked at her arm. There was a deep cut in it.

Lien saw his gaze. "When I was running away, Ren swiped at me. I didn't think that he got me, but I got cut anyway."

Despite it not being something he would usually do, Ren kissed her forehead. Then he placed her on the bed where Pin-Mei put her hand on her child's wound in order to heal it. Ren picked up his Kwan Dao again and waited.

He could hear footsteps coming down the hall. They were slow. Painfully slow. The boy was giving them time to let their fear build, teasing that he didn't know where they were by opening the doors of every room he passed and pretending to look inside.

"Lien...Come back to bed..." he called. "You're not afraid of your Niisama, are you?"

There was a series of slashing sounds, then the door fell in pieces. The two Rens stared each other down, then his son looked past him.

"Lien, so this is where you went. I've been looking all over for you."

He took a step forward, but his father's blade blocked his path.

"Ren, don't you even think about entering this room," the wielder warned.

His son drooped his head. "Is that so?" He raised his weapon.

As he swiped at him, Ren blocked it with ease. "You're at a height disadvantage. It's foolish of you to challenge me like this." He pulled back. "This doesn't have a sharp blade, so you won't be cut deeply, but unfortunately, for the first time, I feel the need to reprimand you."

As he swung, his son looked up at him with tearful eyes.

"Please don't, Papa," he whispered.

Ren froze. His son grinned and thrust his weapon forward. By the time Ren had snapped out of his trance, it was too late to fully dodge, so he moved to the side, allowing the ribs on his right side to be impaled.

"Papa!" Lien cried as Pin-Mei held her back.

"Lien, just stay here. You'll only cause more trouble," she warned.

She quickly reached into the drawer of her nightstand and pulled out a small pile of tags. She threw them about as she discarded the ones that weren't needed. Finally, she chose one and chanted its phrase before throwing it. It landed on her son's forehead, sending small shockwaves through his body. He fell to the ground. With one eye shut in pain, Ren looked down at his son's back. It was cursed by the Tao family emblem.

Pin-Mei panted lightly, then put her head in her hands. Lien looked at her.

"Mama?"

"I never want to make that decision again," she whispered. "...Whether to watch my husband be killed in front of me, or to hurt the son whom I know doesn't mean any of this..." She looked up as Ren put his right hand on her head, using his other hand to hold his wound.

"When this is all over, I'm sure he'll forgive you." He looked to Lien. "But for now, Lien, gather your mother's tags, and be quick about it. We don't have much time. I need to hide the both of you while I figure out what I'm going to do about Ren."

"What do you mean, Papa?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Didn't I just tell you to do something?"

She jumped. "Yes, Papa." She scurried about the room picking up Pin-Mei's tags.

He felt a warmth on his side as his wife began healing his wound. He looked down at her, lost in thought. When she noticed his gaze she smiled weakly, as if trying to reassure him. His face remained placid as he touched her cheek.

"Pin-Mei, you're the one who needs hiding the most."

She tilted her head curiously. "Why is that?"

"He wants to cause as much suffering as he can as a way of soothing his own. The moment he sees that you're pregnant, he'll attack you, leaving only one of you alive; the one that would suffer the most from losing the other."

Her eyes widened and she clutched her stomach. "How do you know?" she whispered.

"Because...that's what I would have done."

"Ren..."

"One tag isn't going to solve things tonight," he said in a low voice so Lien couldn't hear. "He won't be down for long. He's stronger than last time...Things may get bad."

"How...bad...?"

He looked over at Lien, who was still busy collecting, then back at Pin-Mei. He leaned over and whispered in her ear. She covered her mouth and shook her head, then grabbed onto him.

"Please, don't...Do anything...just not that..."

He looked away from her. "If he kills you, he's taking not only you, but the baby also. You're willing to accept that?"

"Why does this night have to end with anyone dying at all? No one said it had to!" she said in a raised voice.

Lien looked up, her face fearful. "Someone's gonna die?"

Pin-Mei saw her fault and reached out to her. "No, no, of course not, honey. Mama and Papa would never let anyone in the castle die."

"Really?" he daughter responded as she walked over to them, the seals in her hands. She looked worried now.

"Of course! You know how strong your father is!" Pin-Mei said excitedly, like a cheerleader trying to pump a crowd with zeal. She softened. "And you know what that means, right?"

Lien blinked at her, then shook her head. Pin-Mei smiled.

"It means that _you're_ strong, too!" She poked her nose. "Remember, that, okay?"

Lien blinked, then smiled. "Okay!"

Ren smiled weakly, but then regained his cold gaze as he heard a moan. He snapped his head back to see the hand of the demonized version of himself twitching. The paralysis spell wouldn't last much longer. He took the pile of tags and stuffed it into Pin-Mei's robe, then took her into a cradle position in his arms. In her condition, there was no way that she would be able to run without harming the baby.

"Lien, we're going. And you have to run really fast. Don't stop unless I tell you to. You understand?"

The little girl clenched her fist and pumped it triumphantly. "Yes, Papa! I understand!"

He smirked at her. "Okay. Now go! I'll be right behind you."

She nodded and started sprinting down the hall.

"We're going to the Ryuyou no Ma," he called up.

Lien kept running but looked back. "Why are we going there?"

"Because we need to hide for a few moments to clear our minds and figure out how to deal with this. And we need to wake up Jun, Ran and En also."

She nodded. "Okay! Leave it to me!"

The Tao family gathered in the basement.

"Where is my grandson?" Ran asked anxiously. "Shouldn't he be here as well?"

Ren shook his head. "He's the reason we're camping here for a few minutes so I can sit down and think about what I'm going to do."

Lien looked up at her mother. "Niisama will be okay...won't he?"

Pin-Mei looked down at her with pained eyes, but tried to smile. "Of course, Lien. Papa's going to go save him and then we can all go back to sleep."

Lien seemed to sense her worry, but pretended to be satisfied. She smiled. "Okay, just asking!"

Smashing could be heard.

"He's looking for us," Ren observed. He turned to look at his mother. "Ran."

She nodded. "Yes, I'll seal the door." She stood in front of the open doorway and held up a tag, chanting the words written on it with her eyes closed.

"Ren..."

He turned around to see Pin-Mei sitting in the infamous dragon chair, her arms outstretched, her head drooped. Pity filled his eyes and he sat down to embrace her.

"Everything's going to be fine, I promise," he whispered. He pushed her away gently and wiped her tears away. "So don't cry, alright? Nothing bad is going to happen."

They looked up when they heard the doors close. Ren lowered his head and closed his eyes in thought.

"If anyone has any ideas of how to do this without killing Ren, I'd love to hear them."

Silence.

"Wonderful."

He heard Pin-Mei shifting restlessly beside him. "Pin-Mei, would you please stop moving around? I can't think when you're squirming." There were a few whimpers and then she shook his arm.

"Ren!"

He didn't open his eyes. "What?" His tone was curt.

"Open your eyes!"

He obeyed but growled at her. "What is it?"

"LIEN'S GONE!"

Ren bolted upright. "What?" He looked around the room. The little girl was nowhere to be found. "Did any of you see her leave?" Everyone shook their heads. His fist clenched and he punched the wall. "DAMN!" _She barely knows how to use a weapon or anything...She has no means of which to fight...Ren's going to kill her!_

"Ran, please! Unseal the doors! I need to get Lien!"

Ren looked back to see Pin-Mei clinging to his mother in desperation. She shook her head sadly.

"I'm sorry, Pin-Mei. The doors won't budge for another thirty minutes."

Pin-Mei started pounding on the double doors, tears streaming down her face. "But what if he kills her? Things won't be the same without her! I don't want to lose my little girl! SOMEONE DO SOMETHING!"

After a nod from her brother, Jun walked over to her, one hand behind her back.

"Pin-Mei..."

She turned around angrily. "What is it?"

Jun just smiled and pressed the tag against her forehead. Her eyes widened, then slowly closed. Ren caught her as she fell and placed her back in the chair.

"Now what?" Jun asked.

"All we can do is wait...and hope for the best..." En said quietly as he watched Ren tend to his wife.

"Um...Ren? Is there anything I can do to help the situation?"

Ren looked up to see Da-Xia's spirit standing to the side of the throne. He thought for a moment, then looked up at her, still serious.

"HoroHoro and Rong were on their way here for a get-together. They should be almost here. Go find them and tell them to hurry. They may be able to save Lien if Ren gets violent with her."

The spirit smiled. "Of course."

Ren gave her a nod of gratitude, then looked around. "Where's Yi? I would have thought that he would be all over something like this."

Her smile faded. He looked at her with remorseful eyes.

"You still can't find him?"

She shook her head. "It's been nearly nine months now...I'm afraid he's gone...that I'll never see him again..."

"I'm sure you'll see him again, even if it's in another life."

She smiled weakly and wiped away a tear. "Yes, that's true." She looked up. "I'm off." She vanished.

Ren turned back to Pin-Mei. He placed his hand on her pregnant belly and closed his eyes. After a few moments, he opened them slightly, looking at the ground.

"If that's true...Da-Xia, I'm sorry."

* * *

Lien ran down the corridors of the dungeon, her eyes scanning the walls for a weapon she could use. She finally walked over to it and picked up a small DaDao. After swinging it a few times she decided it was usable and continued running. As she made it out of the basement she headed toward the main hall, the same one where Ren had fought his father years ago. She stopped in the doorway.

Her brother was on his knees in the center, a small amount of light from a chandelier above him pointing him out to her. His head was in his hands. She slowly walked towards him.

"Ren..."

He looked up at her slowly. "Lien..."

As she approached him, he grabbed her and pulled her down so he could hug her. Her eyes widened. His whole body was shaking.

"Lien...I'm...I'm scared..." she heard him whisper. "There's someone inside me...someone who isn't me...He has Father's voice...He tells me to hurt people...to kill them...When...When Suōshǐ and his friends were hurting you, I told him that if it meant I could save you, that I'd let him take my body...Now all of this has happened...I'm so scared...that..he's going to take over completely...That I'll kill you...and Mama...and Papa...I don't want to...but he might make me..."

His sister looked at him with pitied eyes and hugged him back. "Just fight him, whoever he is, Niisama. You're stronger than you think."

He shook his head. "No...He...He told me that he was the one who made me strong, and that if he leaves I'll just be weak again...I don't want to be like that anymore...Father likes me better this way...I...I..."

"It's okay, Ren," Lien whispered. "Let's just go back to Mama and Papa. They can help you. They-wait...what are you..."

Her brother's hand wrapped around her throat and gripping it tightly. Lien grasped it, trying to pry his fingers away so she could escape. It was no use. Her brother was already stronger than her. She was helpless.

"Foolish girl...Your father is so intelligent, but it doesn't seem as though you were fortunate enough to inherit that trait. No one but you and your mother would have fallen for such an obvious trap. When it comes to people you love, the both of you are as bright as a subway tunnel."

Lien's vision was blurring. She reached out to him. "Nii...sa...ma..."

He grinned and clenched his fist tighter around her. "That's right. Struggle, suffer. That's the way you humans live. It isn't until your last few moments of life that you realize that your lives are insignificant. Only the strong survive, and that, Tao Lien, isn't you."

As Lien's eyes began to close, a ball hit him in the nose and he dropped her. After clutching his face, he looked down to see something the size of a baseball attached to a string. It seemed to glow with a pale blue light.

"Okay, Kiro, come back!"

He watched as the string retracted, taking the ball with it until it rested on the top of a kendama. Xue smiled.

"Nice job, Kiro! You got him to drop her!" The ball seemingly smiled and chirped at her happily.

"My turn!"

Her brother, a boy dressed in a vest decorated with Ainu markings and black pants, sailed over on his snowboard and grabbed the unconscious Lien, saving her from the demon's evil clutches.

"Nice one, Seta!" Xue called.

The boy gave a shaky thumbs up. "This hero stuff isn't as hard as I thought it'd be!"

"Seta, get back over here before I have to come over there and take that snowboard."

The boy's face turned slightly pale. "Yes, Mom."

He cruised back over to the doorway where Rong was standing with her arms crossed.

"Oi, Rong, don't be so hard on him. At least he saved her," HoroHoro said coming up behind her.

She turned to him. "Says you. This is no time to show off, this is serious!" She took out her sectioned whip as HoroHoro produced his ikupasuy. "Da-Xia told us that we have to stall Chibi-Terror here until Ren is able to get out of the room Ran sealed."

"Yeah, yeah, I hear you."

"Xue will go first!" Xue cried hopping forward.

Rong reached out for her. "Xue don't! We have no idea what he's capable of!"

"It'll be okay! Trust Xue!" her daughter replied smiling. She skipping up to the possessed Ren and held out her kendama. "Remember last time Xue let you use this, and you got it on the first try? That was amazing!"

Ren grinned. "I'll get you on the first try, also, you little bitch."

Xue's eyes widened and she covered her mouth. She turned to look at her parents. "Mommy! Daddy! Ren said a grown-up word!"

"Xue get back here!" HoroHoro cried.

Xue tossed her head, turning back to Ren. "Xue can be serious too, ya know."

Ren closed his eyes and chuckled, then looked at her. "We'll see."

Xue pressed a small button on her kendama and pulled back. "Go, Kiro!" she cried as she launched the ball.

It sailed toward him seemingly catching him off guard. But as it neared him, Ren swung his Kwan Dao, cutting the string. The ball bounced twice before settling on the ground.

"Oh...wow...wasn't expecting that..." Xue said, dumbfounded as she stared at her broken weapon.

When she looked up, she saw an attack was headed for her. She shrieked and tried to shield herself with her arms. Then she heard the blast being deflected. She looked up with wide eyes to see her little brother, now almost seven, standing in front of her.

"Neesan, you gotta be a little more careful. He would've gotten you there." He glared at Ren. "Ren, you're my best friend, my nakama...but when you attack my family like that, our friendship is worth nothing. You're my enemy." With a cry and an over souled snowboard on his arm, Seta charged at him. Ren just grinned.

"Bring it...Nakama."

Seta swung at him and blinked. He was gone. His friend appeared next to him and kneed him in the stomach. As his saliva hit the floor, Ren sneered as he grabbed the back of Seta's vest and whispered in his ear.

"I'm not your friend, you half-breed."

He tossed him into the air a little and was about to kick him across the room when his leg was frozen. Rong dove and caught her son a moment later. Seta struggled in her arms.

"Let me at him! I'll smack that grin right off his face! That jerk!"

"Seta, CALM DOWN!"

Seta turned to her, tears in his eyes.

"My best friend just called me a half breed...You have no friggin' idea how I feel!" he said in a loud whisper.

Rong bowed her head. Her son hardly ever cried, but here it was understandable. Ren had been his best friend. They had shared how hard it was at school when people picked on them, they had laughed and played together, grown up together. Now, this person who was like a brother to him had called him the name kids at school had so often used - a half breed.

HoroHoro stepped in front of them. "Seta, that isn't the Ren you know. He's been taken and possessed. The spirit that resides in him now only wishes to hurt you, even kill you. Ren, your nakama, would never say that to you and you know that." He looked back at him and smiled. "All the same, I'm sure that when this is over, he'll apologize to you because that's the type of person he is. Like Pin-Mei, he's over apologetic."

He heard ice cracking and looked to see the Ren had shaken the ice off of him.

"Fucking Ainu," he muttered. He felt a blade at the back of his neck.

"What have a told you about insulting people?"

Ren grinned. "Father, you've come out of hiding, finally. You were setting a poor example for me by running away with your tail between your legs."

"Cut the shit," his father said in a hostile tone. "I know who and what you are, and you certainly aren't my son."

The boy turned. "So what will you do, Tao Ren? Will you kill me now? Or will you give me time to make you regret rejecting me? Just bear in mind that this body will be hurt as well." He pretended to slit his throat with his thumb. "Unless this pathetic boy can overpower me, when I die, he dies as well."

"I've already told Pin-Mei about that possibility, and though she wishes to avoid it, I will do it if I must," Ren replied, seemingly without the least bit of emotion in his voice.

"Ren..." HoroHoro whispered. "Don't you care whether your only son lives or dies?"

Ren bowed his head. "I do...of course I do. He's my son...But I know that he's selfless." He lifted his head. "If it came down to him dying or him hurting any of us, he would choose himself."

The act of Ren saving him at the Shaman Fight nearly fifteen years ago flashed in his mind. He smiled faintly.

_He really is like you_.

"I won't make the mistake of showing you mercy like I did last time. You're holding my son hostage, but sadly, I will no longer be taking the bait."

"Sad for your son," the demon whispered.

Ren held up Houraiken. "Bason!"

Silence.

His son laughed. "I'm sorry, were you looking for this?" Bason appeared above him in chains.

"My lord!" the spirit cried out. "Please forgive my insolence!"

Ren narrowed his eyes. This apparition had stolen his main spirit. He could call on the Spirit of Thunder, but that would surely kill him, something he wanted to avoid if at all possible. He would have to fight without an over soul.

"It would appear that I have the upper hand, Father." The malicious grin on his son's face was almost haunting.

The boy swung his Kwan Dao at Ren, who blocked and countered. As they exchanged blows, Ren kept looking at HoroHoro out of the corner of his eye. Finally, the Ainu figured out what he was trying to tell him.

"Ren wants us to get Lien out of here. He knows that she needs Pin-Mei to heal her right now. Let's go,"

His family nodded and ran out of the room and down the halls, Rong leading the way with Lien in her arms.

"Where do you think they are?" HoroHoro called up.

"I'm not positive," Rong called back, "but I think I have a pretty good hunch."

They burst into the Ryuyou no Ma, causing the Tao family to stop what they had been doing and take notice. While all seemed to show concern for the young female heir, it was Pin-Mei who practically leaped off of the dragon chair and took the child into her arms. She immediately placed her hand on the girl's chest and began the healing process.

"What happened to her?" she whispered listlessly.

"Ren attacked her, it seems," Rong said.

Xue and Seta sat on either side of her, watching the body intently. Rong smiled slightly at the immense look of concern in her son's eyes. He had lately become a boy who was trying to be cool and show off, but hardly ever did anything dangerous or engaged in anything that he was aware would hurt him greatly. Now, he had taken it upon himself to go and rescue Lien. He had raced into the house ahead of his family, though he had to wait for them anyway as HoroHoro and Rong were the only ones who could navigate the castle without getting lost. Still, it was the thought that counted.

Lien soon opened her eyes and sat up. Pin-Mei hugged her.

"Thank goodness..." she whispered. "I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you."

Lien hugged her for a moment, then looked around. "Where's Ren? And Papa?"

"We had to get you out of there," Seta said earnestly. "Ren was about to kill you!"

Lien looked at the ground. "Ren..." Her eyes widened as she looked up again. "Mama!" She clung to her. "Ren's suffering! He's scared, Mama! He told me!"

"Lien," Rong said sadly. "Ren's saying things he doesn't mean right now. He's probably-"

"NO!" she cried as she grabbed her heart. "I felt it! I can always feel if he's happy or sad or mad or scared- anything! He's SCARED! He didn't want things this way!"

"I know Ren doesn't mean any of this, Lien, but..." She drooped her head so her bangs covered her eyes. "If your father can't separate Ren from the spirit controlling him, he may have to kill him."

Lien's eyes widened. "NO!" She ran out of the room.

"Lien!" her mother cried as she reached out for her. She put her head in her hands. "Lien..."

* * *

Ren back flipped as he dodged the demon's attack. As he landed, his ankle twisted, causing him to lose his balance. His son slid and knocked him off his feet, and he fell onto his back. Suddenly, the boy was standing over him, pointing the blade of his Kwan Dao at his father's neck.

Their fight had led them outside. They were now on the terrace of one of the castle's highest floors. It hadn't been Ren who wanted to fight in such a confined area. His adversary had led him there, knowing that he would have less maneuverability.

"It's a shame, really," the boy said. "You weren't able to completely bury the feelings you have for your son and fight me like I was truly an enemy. You've gone soft, Tao Ren. When you had me, you wouldn't hesitate to eliminate anyone who was in your path to greatness. Now, you're just a teddy bear."

"I don't need you," Ren said defiantly. "And neither does he!"

The demon smirked, then laughed. "This boy needed me like he needs air and water. He was so weak that it was child's play taking over his body. Like taking candy from a baby...except now that baby realizes he's been had and wants his lollipop back." He paused, letting Ren soak in the silence. "Can you hear that? Your beloved son screaming in terror? Soon, his soul will completely deteriorate and this body will be mine. Tao Ren II will be no more."

Ren's eyes shot open at this. As cold of a person as he had been all his life, he had realized after the teasing started that he wanted give his children the love he himself hadn't received growing up. That's why he had opted to take his son outside every evening to teach him martial arts and the Kwan Dao. He had understood that the love he gave Pin-Mei and the love he gave his children were different things. At times, he had even envied her for how their children ran right up to her and jumped into her arms while they seemed to shy away from him.

But he had noticed that the more time he spent with Ren, the more willing the otherwise timid boy was to approach him. Being the narcoleptic she was, Pin-Mei would sometimes fall asleep before her own children's bedtime, leaving them without a story. While Ren had been the one to occasionally tell of the adventures he and Pin-Mei had years ago, Pin-Mei was the one who would take any picture book her children gave her and read it aloud to them before tucking them in at night. All the same, little Ren had waddled over to him one night, one of his three favorite books, _The Faithful Friend_ by Robert San Souci, in his hands.

"_Your mother's asleep," he had said before going back to his green tea._

"_But...um...you're...not...asleep..." his son replied, hiding his face behind his book._

"_No, I'm not." _

"_Will you...um...read it to me?"_

_Ren didn't look up. "You've been reading since you were three. You're perfectly capable of reading it yourself."_

_The boy's head drooped. "But I want Papa to read it to me..."_

"_Why does it matter?"_

"_Because...I...I love you, Papa, and I want to spent more time with you."_

_Ren stopped and looked at him. The boy was looking away, his face bright red. After a moment of consideration, he put down his cup and got up._

"_Alright, come on." _

"You accepted me because of all the pain your own father caused you. Maybe your son accepted me for the same reason."

"No, he didn't," Ren whispered, his eyes hidden.

The hellion's smile faded. "What was that?"

Ren looked up at him with dagger-like eyes. "Ren accepted you because he thought that what he was doing was right. He was only thinking about saving Lien. The consequences he himself would face didn't cross his mind for an instant. You tricked him and stole his body." He smirked. "He doesn't want you anymore. Now, you're only a nuisance to him."

The fiend's eyes flared as he raised his weapon. "Burn in hell you impudent human," he muttered as his grin returned.

He was about to bring it down when he heard murmuring.

"I...I'm a Tao just like Papa...I...fear nothing...I'm strong and fearless...I'm a Tao..."

He looked up to see Lien clinging to the post that connected the rails that lined the terrace. Tears were apparent in her eyes.

"Lien, nice to see you again," her brother said, shifting his weight so it all rested on the chest of the man under him.

Lien flinched. "Niisama..." she said slowly. "I know you're in there, and I'm about to prove it."

She stood on top of the rails, barely touching the pillar. Ren's eyes widened.

"Lien? What are you...?"

She reached into her night shirt and pulled out a tag. He read the word.

**Sleep**.

The demon laughed. "What do you think you'll accomplish by doing that besides killing yourself?"

Lien remained firm, her hair tossing in the wind. "I'm going to wake up my Niisama."

"LIEN! Don't you dare do this!" Ren cried.

She looked at him, more tears filling her eyes.

"Papa, I love you very much," she said softly. "I know I never really say it much nowadays, but remember when I was little? I even told everyone that I was gonna marry you because I thought you were cute. Mama thought it was funny..."

"LIEN! GET DOWN FROM THERE!" Ren screamed. His heart was thumping in his chest. His mind was shutting down. He couldn't even move to force her down himself. All he could do was watch helplessly.

"I love you, Papa, Niisama...Tell Mama I love her, too."

"**LIEN!"**

She let go of the post and pressed the tag against her forehead.

Her eyes closed.

She fell.


	67. Sad Resolution

Yay! I make HoroHoro sound intelligent in this chapter!

I'm sorry if this is getting long. Don't worry. Next chapter starts the final arc, then a couple wrap up chapters for the end. I'll let you in on a secret: At least two characters are going to die by the end of the story – and stay dead.

******Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Seven: Sad Resolution**

* * *

Father and son watched as Lien's body fell from view. There was silence. Suddenly, Ren looked up as the boy standing on him threw his head back and laughed. His eyes narrowed as he glared at him.

"What are you laughing at?"

The boy grasped his bangs. "I can't believe that bitch actually did it! She seemed like someone who would chicken out at the last minute, but she proved me wrong. I don't even know if that's laudable or LAUGHable. I think it's the latter." He laughed again.

Ren turned to look through the rails once more before his face hardened and his eyes burned with rage. He grabbed his son by the throat and threw him off his chest and against the rails. The demon hit his head on the banister, causing him to grab it in pain. Ren stood, eying him with murderous intent.

"That was my only daughter, you fucking bastard," he said in a low voice.

"So what?"

Ren picked up the Kwan Dao his son had been using and stuck it into the brute's shoulder, pinning him to the rails. He wailed in pain.

"Your sister is dead, Ren...AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" Ren yelled.

When his son looked up at him with wide eyes, Ren knew that he had struck a cord. Even if it was too late to save Lien, he could at least not let her death be in vain.

"She killed herself because of you," he whispered darkly. "Do you think she wanted to die? Do you think she wanted to throw her life away like that? DO YOU?"

Young Ren's eyes were widening by the second. He looked over his shoulder with eyes of horror, his mouth gaping. He reached for the weapon still embedded in his shoulder and pulled it out, then slowly backed away from the railing. Ren watched him intently. His son was obviously horrified by the tragedy he had caused. Maybe he had him back once and for all.

Suddenly, the young boy sprinted toward the railing, Kwan Dao in hand, and started to vault it. Ren ran and grabbed his right ankle. His son remained still, his voice clam.

"Father, let go of me."

"No! I'm not losing both of you!"

"You won't." He looked up at him. "Father, I know that I don't deserve your trust now because of what I've done, but please, even if it's only out of spite, let me fall. I'll save Lien..." He looked him in the eye, not blinking. "...I swear on my honor as the scion of the Tao family."

Ren closed his eyes for a moment, seemingly in pain. "I want you to bring her back," he said softly as he opened his eyes.

His son smiled brightly, getting what he was saying. "I promise I will, Father."

He let go of him.

"Thank you," they both whispered.

As his father's face faded from view, Ren pointed himself toward the ground. He held out his Kwan Dao.

"Bason, Hyoi Gattai,"

The spirit obeyed as the golden spiked ball appeared near the blade. Ren positioned it behind him.

"Forgive me, Bason,"

The over soul exploded, propelling him toward the ground. Lien's limp body came into view. Moments later, he grabbed her and held her close to him.

"Bason, Hyoi Gattai," he repeated.

Again he obeyed. Ren closed his eyes and concentrated as he pumped every last drop of his furyoku into the oversoul.

Lien suddenly woke up. She looked at her brother. "Ren...? What's going on?"

He smiled weakly at her. "I'm saving you after you did something stupid."

"What?" She looked around. "You dummy! Now we're **both** gonna die!"

He laughed slightly and shook his head. "No...Not both of us."

She blinked. "Niisama? What are you-?"

She was silenced when he kissed her cheek.

"I love you, Mei Mei," he whispered as he held her close. Lien watched as her brother took her hands and forced them to grasp the pole. "Whatever you do, don't let go."

She nodded, and he moved down until he was holding the hilt near the blade. He put himself in front of it so the blade was positioned at his chest. Her eyes widened. She reached out for him.

"Niisama!"

"DON'T LET GO!" he screamed with an anger she had never heard him use.

Scared, she grasped the pole even tighter.

"It's better this way..." he whispered. "This way...I know that I won't hurt you anymore."

"Niisama!" Tears were in her eyes.

The ground was so close.

She reached her hand out.

"Please...I'm scared..." she reasoned before he could yell at her again.

He smiled at her with soft eyes and winced as he extended his own hand to grasp hers.

"I love you, too, Niisama," she whispered.

Her ill-fated brother smiled at her kindly. "Took you long enough..."

They hit the ground.

Lien screamed.

* * *

"Where did they go?" Pin-Mei wondered as she passed the front doors, the Usui family in tow.

"They couldn't have gone far," Rong asserted, passing her.

They heard something between a crash, a crack, a snap, and a splat. Then a scream.

Pin-Mei stopped dead in her tracks, her face instantly turning white. She ran as fast as she could manage, which was barely a speed walk, through the doors and to the left side of the castle. She turned the corner, she stopped again, her eyes wide. As rain poured down on her, her hands went to her cheeks in sheer disbelief.

"**REN!"**

* * *

Ren had been running down the stairs at light speed. He thought he heard a thump, so he went a little faster. There was a scream. He ran faster. But when he heard his name being screamed, he went as fast as his legs would carry him.

Suddenly, he was in front of his son, who lay motionless on the ground. His Kwan Dao was standing on end, its blade impaling the boy's midsection. Lien was crumpled over his chest, sobbing. Pin-Mei was kneeling next to his body doing the same. Ren fell to his knees next to her. She saw him and latched onto him, silently begging him to wake her up from this horrible nightmare.

Holding his breath, he reached out in a fruitless attempt to take the boy's pulse. Nothing. He inhaled sharply.

Inside, he felt guilty. His words came back to him. He felt that he had maybe unintentionally given his son the notion that he cared more about Lien's safety than her brother's. This of course wasn't the case, but it is to be expected that every parent question their past actions, wondering if they could have prevented such a tragedy.

"Lien, what happened?" He was still the head of the family. He couldn't show weakness, even at a time such as this.

Lien tried to control herself, wiping her eyes constantly. "He...He...used his over soul and made it real big...so I wouldn't get hurt when we landed...B...But he made sure the blade hit him because he didn't want to...to...be able to hurt me anymore..." She broke down as her voice trailed off and then hid her face again.

Ren wished that this was a time to be proud. His son was indeed a genius. To know that he could use over soul for such a thing without being taught or even told...It was amazing. But now, other than the fact that Lien had been saved using that technique, it meant nothing. He wrapped his arms around Pin-Mei and rested his head on top of hers.

"It's such a shame. I was never really able to have any fun."

Ren looked up slowly. The evil apparition, now separated from the boy's body, was standing before them. He said nothing, only glared at him.

The spirit sighed. "You and your son are the same. When you sister gets into trouble, you cast me aside to foolishly risk your life to save her." He grinned at the corpse. "Except this time, I'm actually quite amused by the results."

"Shut the fuck up."

Ren stood slowly, his eyes fixed on the shadow of his former self.

"My son knew you would separate from him if he died. After all, a dead body is incapable of harboring a soul. I'd praise his intelligence, but something tells me he got that idea from you."

The apparition's eyes narrowed in confusion. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Ren smirked. "You've forgotten how I had planned to take Amidamaru from Yoh?" When an expression of worry crossed the demon's face, his grin grew slightly wider. "Now that you're no longer attached to him, I have no problem banishing you from my sight." He turned his head. "HoroHoro."

The Ainu was already standing next to him. "I know." The Sprit of Rain rose up behind him. "Drown him," he whispered darkly.

The spirit raised its hand and clenched it. Water shot out of its fist and and surrounded the apparition, encasing it in a spherical prison.

Ren looked back at his son as the Spirit of Thunder appeared.

_This is for you, Ren. _"Spirit of Thunder, attack him until there's nothing left. Don't stop until his flame is completely extinguished."

The spirit roared as bolts of electricity shot out of its body and toward the hellion. Rong frantically covered her children's eyes to shield them from the flashes of lightning in front of them as she herself closed her eyes. When she sensed that the light had died down, she slowly opened them. Knowing it was safe to do so, she removed her hands from Xue and Seta's eyes. They blinked and looked around.

"Where'd that weird Uncle Renny go?" Xue wondered aloud.

Seta jiggled her arm and pointed. In the direction of his finger was a blackened spot on the ground.

"Oh."

Ren breathed deeply and went back to sit with his wife. She immediately latched onto him once more and cried, seemingly harder.

Rong and HoroHoro turned their heads away. Then Rong mimicked Pin-Mei and latched onto her husband, sobbing into his chest. Seta had just stood stiffly, staring at his best friends bloodied body. Xue stood by her father's side, suddenly wanting to join her parents' embrace.

Seta almost followed suit when he looked at Lien. She had by now sat up, her brother's blood on her chest. No one was there to hold her, to catch her tears. After making eye contact with his father, he walked over to the distraught twin and knelt next to her. He just barely touched her arm and she snapped her head up to look at him. Seta lifted his arms slightly, and she collapsed onto his chest.

HoroHoro looked at his son, regret in his eyes. Part of him wanted to be happy, as it had almost been a "goal" of Seta's to hug Lien...He just wished the circumstances were different.

As he looked at Ren's body, he couldn't help but think about how ironic it was that his father had once been in the same position – knocking on Death's door. Blood spread on the ground near his head and midsection. His body temperature, respiration, and heart rate all dwindling.

_If Faust hadn't come up with that idea of using furyoku like a defibrillator, he would have died for sure..._

His eyes shot wide open.

"Ren," he whispered.

Nothing. He said it louder.

"Ren."

"What?" he snapped.

HoroHoro ignored the attitude. "We can still save him."

Ren's eyes widened. "What are you talking about?" He sounded doubtful all the same.

But Pin-Mei, her naivety getting the best of her, was willing to place everything on an idea. "Horokeu, please!" She tugged on his pants lightly.

The Ainu looked down at her sympathetically. Whenever it came to her children, Pin-Mei would sometimes lose control. Then again, he had no idea what it was like to lose a child, so he wasn't in any place to judge her. He let go of Rong, who quickly wiped her eyes.

"Almost sixteen years ago, when you were in the same position, Ren, Faust was the one who came up with the method to revive you using furyoku." He looked away for a moment. "I'm no doctor, but I was watching out of the corner of my eye, so I think I get the basic idea. I might not even know how to do it right...but we don't have many options do we?"

Pin-Mei looked to her husband with pleading eyes.

"Like he said, we don't have a lot of options," Ren said finally. "Let's try it."

Ren, Pin-Mei, HoroHoro, and Rong assembled around the boy, kneeling. The remaining children stood around them.

"Okay," HoroHoro said, "what we're going to do is place our hands on Ren's chest. Then I heard Faust say something like "concentrate you consciousness, as if pouring life into him"."

He watched Pin-Mei motion to put her hands in position. He stopped her.

"Pin-Mei, we're going to need you to heal Ren's wound when we take the Kwan Dao out of him," he said. "That's what has been lessening how much blood he's losing. Once we pull it out, the blood that was being blocked by it is going to rush out, so you need to close it as quickly as possible. If the blade went all the way through him and into the ground, then the wound is obviously very deep."

Pin-Mei nodded dumbly. She surveyed her son's body once again. The sight of seeing the weapon embedded in his body was arguably the most horrific sight she had ever had the misfortune of seeing. Ren touched her thigh gently before turning to the remaining children.

"Lien, go to the medical wing and get a bag of blood, type AB; we're going to need it. Seta, you go with her in case she gets squeamish. Xue, I want you to get a few towels in case we need them." They just stood there. "WHAT ARE YOU STANDING AROUND FOR? GO!"

The three children jumped and ran back into the house.

"An umbrella or five would be nice!" Rong called.

"Yeah, we can't move him or he'll lose too much blood by the time we get him to infirmary," Ren whispered.

Silence.

"So...who wants to pull it out?" Rong said, trying to sound casual.

"I'll do it," Ren said quickly as he stood. "It was my weapon that did this." His bangs were covering his eyes. He was obviously trying to hide the irrational guilt he carried for what happened to his son.

Slowly, he grasped the pole. After a count of three, he pulled the blade from his son's body. Pin-Mei laid her hands on the wound and immediately went to work trying to heal it. The children soon returned with the blood and towels. A few servants were following close behind them in raincoats holding large umbrellas.

After about five minutes, Ren noticed that she was beginning to nod off. He shook her shoulder lightly.

"What's going on? Are you tired already?"

She laughed nervously. "Yeah...pathetic isn't it? It's because I slacked off and never tried to improve my healing techniques...I just never thought I'd have to use them like this again. I'm sorry...after you went through the trouble of trying to help me control my furyoku, too..."

"Don't worry about that right now! It doesn't matter! Just as long as you can seal Ren's wound!" he cried.

She lowered her eyes. "But what if I can't? The last time I used it like this was eleven years ago...and I was able to go for almost an hour then..." She laughed again. "...I guess I'm getting old."

"Aw come on, Pin-Mei," HoroHoro laughed. "No one would have guessed you're knocking on 30's door!"

Pin-Mei smiled at him. "Thanks...I'm 26 by the way."

Rong smacked him. "Consult me before you go talking to people about their age!"

He held his head in pain. "Yes, ma'am."

Lien blinked as she leaned over to Seta and Xue.

"Your mom's scary sometimes."

The Usui siblings sighed. "You have no idea."

Ren looked at Pin-Mei again. She was panting. He couldn't tell if she was sweating due to her already rain-soaked skin, but there was no doubt in his mind that if it were dry, she would be.

"Pin-Mei, try to calm down. Just do the best you can," he said, his hand returning to her thigh.

No more than a minute later, the glow of her hands faded. Ren caught her as she started falling to the side.

"I...I didn't finish," she whispered, her eyes filled with tears.

Ren ripped open his son's shirt and looked at the wound. There was still a scar.

"You did well. No more blood is coming out, so you did your job," he assured her as he patted her head a few times. "We'll take care of the rest."

Li came and laid down a towel, then a small plush mattress for Pin-Mei to lie down on, as she refused to go inside. She wanted to see her son open his eyes.

"The three of us should be enough," HoroHoro said as he, Ren, and Rong placed their hands on the boy's chest. "Okay, remember think like you're pouring life into him." They all took a deep breath. "Go."

The three adults closed their eyes as they began to revival process. Their hands glowed as orbs of furyoku formed in them. All at once, they pushed them into the lifeless boy, causing his chest to heave upwards for a moment, then fall. They tried again. Ren placed his ear to his son's chest. He shook his head.

The children watched their parents force more of their furyoku into the breathless boy before them. Lien was shaking. This was the closest she had ever been to death. She hadn't gone to Grandpa Zhen's funeral as her parents had not allowed her to attend. Now she knew it was because someone like her couldn't handle seeing a lifeless body in front of them. Her parents had each already felt that pain and had attempted to shield her from it.

As tears filled her eyes once more, she took a few steps forward. Xue grabbed her arm.

"Hey, hey, our parents are trying to fix him. You shouldn't-"

"You're such a jerk, Ren!" Lien screamed.

The adults didn't seem to hear her. They were concentrating on their task. Lien clenched her fists tight as she gritted her teeth. She stomped her foot.

"It's always about you!" she screamed again. "You're such an attention bum, you idiot! You always needed to be the freakin' center of attention or else you'd get all upset! Whenever I called you a dummy or an idiot you'd always go crying to Mom and she'd pick you up and hold you and tell you how cute and handsome you were becoming and what a good boy you were! You'd just smile and blush like a freakin' idiot and tell her you loved her!"

She stopped and stared at the ground. She shut her eyes.

"That's what you used to be like...You never cried after that day at school...you changed! I couldn't even call you by your name anymore – you told me not to. You didn't hug me anymore and tell me you love me...You didn't play with me anymore...You didn't even pay much attention to me at school..."

She tried to take another step forward, but was again tugged back by Xue. Lien fell to her knees instead.

"I want my old brother back!" she screamed. "I want that little wuss who would drink milk just to get out of school and needed a night light to go to sleep! I want that stupid showoff who was reading while I was still playing with blocks! I want that clueless idiot who believed me when I said he'd die if he didn't let me give him a cootie shot!

"Even if you aren't the same when you come back...Even if you're still all serious and you won't let me touch you...Even if you start making fun of me and call me names like I used to do to you...I don't want the be the oldest! You're my twin – you have to come back, you idiot! You better! If you don't, I'll hate you forever!"

She lowered her head as the adults continued their efforts to revive her brother. Ren put his ear to his son's chest.

"Once more."

They counted to three and pushed their furyoku into him one last time. Lien looked at her father's face intently. Seeing him close his eyes, she whimpered and took a deep breath.

"I HATE YOU REN!" she screamed.

Almost instantly, there was coughing. She looked up to see her brother's body twitching as it turned on its side. A few drops of blood fell from his mouth and onto the ground as he rolled over and finally sat up. He looked around at the small crowd of people that had gathered, his eyes wide.

"Father? What's going on? Why am I-?"

Ren grabbed his shoulder and lightly slapped him across the face. The boy slowly brought his hand up to his cheek and grasped it.

"Ren! What are you doing?"

Ren ignored her. "That's for disobeying me," he said quietly.

His son looked up at him. "What?"

Ren grabbed him and forced him to look at Pin-Mei, whose eyes were still red and swollen.

"I told you to NEVER upset your mother like you did a few months ago, and then you go try to commit suicide because you think it will fix things? What were you thinking?"

The revived Ren looked back at his father to see a hint of tears in the corners of his eyes.

"Father..."

Ren turned away and shoved his smaller self toward Pin-Mei, who was sitting up and ready to receive her son. She put a towel on his shoulders and embraced him tightly.

"You have no idea how scared I was," she whispered. "I thought I'd never be able to hold you like this again..." She squeezed him tighter. "Please don't ever endanger yourself like that again. I don't know what I would have done if I had lost you."

"You'd still have Lien," Ren said flatly.

"Yes...But I wouldn't have you. I'd miss looking at that cute little face of yours."

"Father and I look the same. You could look at his instead of mine."

"But it wouldn't be the same as looking at you. The two of you are more different than you may think."

"You'll be having another baby anyway."

"No two people are the same. The baby would never be able to replace you." She looked up at her daughter. "The same goes for you, Lien. I don't want you to do anything like that ever again. I'd be devastated if I lost either one of you."

Lien went to walk over to her, but her father called her over. She trudged up to him slowly, seemingly expecting a punishment similar to her brother's for allowing herself to fall from the railing. "Yes, Papa?"

He lowered himself to her level and grabbed her shoulders. "I'm going to tell you what I told your brother; Don't EVER do anything like that again. Killing yourself will only hurt those around you. Your mother and I found that out the hard way, and neither of us ever want to experience anything like that ever again. Especially not with our children." He shook her. "Do you understand me?"

She nodded, seemingly frightened. "Yes, Papa."

He sighed and hugged her. "Let's go inside. I'm exhausted just as I'm guessing the rest of us are."

Lien nodded and moved to turn to walk into the house, but Ren silently scooped her up into his arms.

For the first time that she could remember, he carried her to bed.


	68. The Milky Charm of a Chandelier

-Bows a million times- PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! Dx This was supposed to be posted a long time ago, like two weeks, but computer lab regulations at the Japanese camp I was at slowed the writing process down A LOT. Sorry...-gets shot-

**Notes: Hope you like the baby's name xD**

**************Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga **_**Shaman King.**_** The story ****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Eight: The Milky Charm of a Chandelier**

* * *

Though the spirit never appeared in Tao Castle again, the effect it had had on the young scion was apparent.

He never fully regained his pure personality. While he was kind and helpful, he was, at times, harsh and cold to those around him, with the exception of his parents. Lien rarely received such treatment, but it wasn't unheard of.

A few months later, after the last Tao child was born, the family visited their friends in Japan. It was there that they all saw how the young Ren was beginning to follow in the more benign footsteps of his father.

* * *

"Sit down and let us see him!"

"Yeah! Come on, Auntie Pin-Mei! Sit!"

Pin-Mei smiled and calmly sat in the chair Seta brought for her. The Usui siblings surrounded her, their parents behind them, as Pin-Mei looked to the baby leaning against her shoulder. Ren soon came to stand beside her, the twins in tow. The baby reached its tiny hand out to him, but Pin-Mei turned her child so that he sat on her lap facing its hosts. It looked at them curiously with large amber eyes.

"He looks nothing like either of you," HoroHoro observed, bending down so he was at the tot's level. The baby smacked him on the nose. He sighed. "Just as violent as his father, though."

Ren patted the baby's head gently. "Good boy. Keep it up." He turned his attention to the baby's victim. "Jun has green hair, so it's not that far fetched for him to have it."

"I get it," Rong said. She bent down and waved at the baby. "Hey there, cutie. And what's your name?"

Pin-Mei broke into a nervous smile. "Well...His name is...um..."

"I picked it," Ren interrupted. "That was the deal. She could have one more child if I got to name it."

Rong stood. "This should be grand. You probably gave him something sophisticated or patriotic, like after a great warrior or emperor or something, right?"

He gave a prideful smirk. "His name is Níu-Năi."

Her eyes widened. "Níu...Năi? You named him Níu-Năi?"

"What is it, Rong?" HoroHoro asked, eager to know the meaning of the boy's name. "Is he named after the most powerful warrior? The most benevolent emperor?" He heard some stifled laughter from behind him, and turned to see Seta and Xue rolling on the ground in a fit of giggles. "What is it?"

"Níu-Năi means 'milk', HoHo," Rong said stiffly.

The Ainu looked at his friend as if he had three heads. "You named your son 'Milk'? What kind of sick bastard are you?" He looked at Pin-Mei. "And how could you let him do it? This is your son! He only gets one name and you let this jerk name him after his favorite drink?"

"It was either that or San," the mother replied calmly as she waved her hands in front of her son's face.

HoroHoro was still fuming. "Couldn't you have come up with some masculine form of Pin-Mei or something? She did the same for you with Lien!"

"There isn't one," she said, playing with her son, seemingly ignoring the rest of the conversation. "Plus, Ren wouldn't go that far." She gently shook the baby's tiny hands. "He's not that type of man, no he isn't!"

Ren gave an annoyed sigh. "Besides, what do you care about what I name my children anyway? I could have given him a very inappropriate name, but I didn't."

"And 'Milk' is appropriate?"

"Well, he's not lactose intolerant."

The moment he said it, he secretly bit his tongue. He had forgotten that his other son was within earshot.

The boy turned and began walking away. "Come on, Lien."

His sister nervously looked back and forth between her brother and father, ultimately choosing to follow her twin across the yard. "Okay..."

The baby reached out to them, upset. "Bwabwa! Sasa!" When they kept going, he started whimpering, then crying. As his cries radiated throughout the yard, a girl, seemingly ten, ran up to them, a bottle in her hands.

"Here, Milady," she said softly.

Pin-Mei nodded and took it from her and gave it to her son. The infant instantly calmed down, closing its eyes as it relaxed. His mother sighed.

"Thank you for that, Huan," she said. "It would have taken a while for me to go and get him one."

HoroHoro blinked. "You could have just breastfed him."

Ren glared at him menacingly. "My wife doesn't give free shows."

Xue, in another giggling fit, turned to see Yoh, Anna, and Hana walking toward them. Her eyes lit up. "Hana!"

The adults watched as Xue bolted up to the Asakura heir and pounced on him, sending them both to the ground. She purred as she nuzzled against him.

"I haven't seen you in so long, Hana!"

The boy sighed. "It's been less than a week."

"I know! That's a lot of hours!"

Yoh laughed as he and Anna made their way over to the Tao and Usui families. "She sure gets attached easily," he said.

HoroHoro sighed. "Yeah. Reminds me of her mother."

Rong glared at him. "The hell is that supposed to mean?"

He stuck his tongue out at her. "You were the one who begged me have sex with you before I left."

"What?"

"I need you, Horokeu. Please! I'll never fall in love again, Horokeu! Only you, Horokeu! You're so big, Horokeu! Faster Horokeu faster!"

Some knuckles cracked. Without warning, Rong punched him clear across the yard, her face beet red. Their son stared as she stomped after him to continue beating him, then looked up at Pin-Mei, who was trying to stifle her laughter.

"Auntie Pin-Mei, what are they talking about?"

She froze. She looked up at Ren, who said nothing, then blushed as she turned back to the curious boy.

"Well…um…that is…um…when a man and a women love each other very much, they-,"

"Pin-Mei, he's much too young for 'the talk'," Ren interjected. "Don't worry; I'm sure he'll get it when Rong and HoroHoro feel he's ready…surely before you did."

She pretended to pout. "You're still so mean to me sometimes."

"You like it and you know it."

He was right.

Yoh looked at the small girl standing next to Pin-Mei. Her dark brown hair was kept back in a bun, sans a few pieces in the front on either side of her head. She wore black servant attire made of cotton; a long dress with long sleeves and an apron.

"I haven't seen this girl before. Who is she?"

Pin-Mei smiled faintly and turned to her. "This is Qiao Huan," she said slowly. The girl smiled and curtsied.

The moment the surname left Pin-Mei's lips, Rong's eyes widened and she glared at the child. Still, she said nothing.

"Funny story, really," Pin-Mei went on, a fake chuckle trying to shield her discomfort. "We found her on our doorstep during a rainstorm...We were puzzled as to how she navigated through the mountains, especially with how slippery they must have been at the time. But honestly, how could we just throw her back out into the eye of the storm?"

"So now I serve the Tao family in order to thank them for saving my life," Huan said.

The death glare of the former Wei warrior had only intensified as the details surrounding the sudden appearance of Huan had come to light. She smirked and went to go stand in front of the girl.

"So, tell me, Huan, where is your Wei maidservant?" she asked with faux curiosity.

The girl looked shocked for a moment, but quickly gathered herself. "But I was told that the Wei family only served the Fan family."

Rong gave her a haunting smile. "We came to serve the Fan family because Suo had, at one time, had her own maidservant. Of course she was killed through that woman's insanity…But if you _are_ from the Qiao family, Huan, where is your maidservant? Hm?"

"I was never assigned one,"

"Impossible. Junbao is a few years older than you and would have been the perfect age to serve you."

The girl quivered.

"Why aren't you at the Qiao family castle right now? Why did they cast you out?"

"I…I don't know!"

"Maybe they sensed something about you as you grew up. Maybe their reasoning was perfectly logical. Maybe…Just maybe you're here to harm my former lady."

The girl's eyes filled with tears. "Lady Pin-Mei…I…I'm going to get the baby lord's blanket and…other things…" She shifted away from Rong and ran back from whence she had come. Her attacker still had a look of murderous intent in her eyes as she turned to the Tao mother.

"I don't trust the little bitch," she said. "It's too much of a coincidence."

Pin-Mei looked at the ground sadly. Ren snapped his head away. "At least someone finally sees things my way." He looked down at her. "You're too trusting, Pin-Mei. Too trusting, and too soft-hearted. That girl appeared out of nowhere in some of the most severe weather conditions, and you ignore that small part of you that knows she's just a wolf in sheep's clothing and let her take care of the only children you have. Do you want something that happened twelve years ago to happen to them? Do you want them to suffer like you did? Like we all did that night?"

She just bowed her head. "I'm sorry…I just kept thinking that if something had ever happened, and Lien had ever wound up in a situation like Huan's, that I would want someone to take care of her. That's why I wanted to take her in."

Ren looked like he was about to unleash some more heated words upon her when Yoh got between them.

"It really_ could_ just be a weird coincidence," he said. "I mean, couldn't there be another Qiao family somewhere in China? There's nothing that says that she _has_ to be related to Suo."

Ren glared at him, his nose only inches away from Yoh's. "Of course it's easy for you to say something like that. You just had to watch the nightmare. I had to _live_ it."

He slipped past him and over to where his children were going through fighting forms. Yoh looked back at the two remaining Taos. Pin-Mei's eyes told him that she was obviously troubled by the whole situation.

"It's tearing us apart," she whispered. "We're constantly fighting about her, about getting rid of her or just killing her. Now we sometimes get into fights about the smallest and most trivial things. I don't know what to do…I'm worried that it will come down to a "Me or her" situation."

"Who would you pick?" HoroHoro asked.

"Ren, of course," she replied quickly. "But I would still feel bad about doing away with Huan. There's nothing more I hate than having someone else's fate in my hands."

"Then you never should have had children," Anna said sharply. "Until they leave the nest, their lives will always be in your hands."

Yoh glanced at her as if to say that she was being harsh, but Pin-Mei gave a sad smile. "I suppose you're right." Her gaze trailed over to Ren and the twins, each holding a Kwan Dao. Everyone else looked as well.

HoroHoro's mouth dropped. "Woah, where'd he get those? And when?"

"They're those extendable ones," Pin-Mei said softly. "You know Ren; he's naked without it." She smiled. "Even though 'Little Ren' is still cold to most, he's immersed in learning everything that his father wants to teach him. I…I think it makes Ren happy to know that he's able to pass his abilities down to his children…even if Lien does it only to earn her the approval of the two of them."

Rong looked at her. "What about your abilities? Will you be passing down your fan fighting techniques to Lien?"

Her former mistress shook her head. "No. I intend to let the Fan family fighting style die when I do so that it will never have the chance of falling into evil hands ever again. I won't allow anyone else to be hurt by it."

"Don't be so overly dramatic," Anna said sighing. "You could just simply say that you don't want to teach her."

"Yeah…Sorry."

* * *

"Okay, now go through the third form." Ren and Lien nodded. Their father led them into a clear part of the yard, allowing Pin-Mei and the others to marvel at their skills.

Before they could start, Huan ran up to them. "Lady Lien, I have something for you." When Lien turned to her, Huan smiled and held up a simple charm with a bell and a small piece of metal engraved with kanji attached to a red tassel. She tied it to the hilt of the blade as she spoke. "It's for good luck," she reasoned. She smiled. "Do your best, Milady."

Lien gave her a small smile. She knew that her father didn't trust this girl, but knew that she nonetheless had to be polite and accept the gift. "Thank you." Her voice was slightly shaky.

"Lien, get over here," Ren commanded. His daughter shuffled over to him, knowing that to disobey him was the same as begging for the wrath of a god. He pointed to a space on the ground near his son. "Do the form."

She nodded and joined her brother, who was already on the ground on one knee, signifying that he was ready. She knelt down about ten feet away from him, her Kwan Dao on the ground to her right.

_I can do this…Papa…Niisama…I'll make you proud of me._

The twins grabbed their weapons and jumped up, their legs spread. Their blades were waved about as they took various battle poses and thrusted at imaginary enemies. They soon moved on to more flowing, acrobatic movements while the adults watched from about thirty feet away.

"Ren's abilities are quite impressive," Rong observed. "It would seem that he finds doing such complicated movements boring." She gave a shaky smile as she saw Lien almost drop her weapon.

HoroHoro mimicked her. "At least she tries hard."

Beside them, Ren nodded. "She struggles, but she doesn't give in. She does it until she gets it right."

Pin-Mei looked up at him. There was a near unnoticeable smile on his face. Since that fateful night only a few months before, he had begun treating Lien more like a daughter he cherished instead of a child that he was hardly ever warm to. He would carry her to bed if she fell asleep elsewhere when he used to wake her up and make her walk by herself. When she hurt herself, he wouldn't wait for Pin-Mei or a female servant to patch her up, but would do it himself. When she was upset, he was more empathetic and willing to hold her. He made more of an effort to fake a laugh at her childish sense of humor.

Pin-Mei remembered feeling a little sad at the fact that she and Lien weren't together as often as before, but she found solace in her two sons, who were constantly at her side; one for obvious reasons, the other simply because he wanted to be.

Her train of thought was lost as Níu-Năi whimpered and then started wailing. She tried to calm him by rocking him and cooing, but nothing seemed to work. Defeated, she produced a pacifier whose base resembled the face of a cow, and stuck it in his mouth. His cries hadn't phased the two performers, who were near the end of their routine. Lien nearly sighed with relief as she twirled her weapon around her body.

_Just one more move_.

She threw the Kwan Dao high up into the air as Ren did the same. Xue and Seta clapped their hands in wide-eyed amazement as the adults looked up as well.

The elder Ren squinted his eyes. The charm on Lien's weapon seemed to glow as if sunlight was hitting it. He looked around and noticed that the sun was currently hidden behind a cloud. He frowned and looked back at his daughter, biting the inside of his lip in an attempt to figure out what was going on.

As her brother's blade somersaulted in the air and began to gracefully fall back into his hands, hers seemed to freeze for a moment. It suddenly turned vertically with its blade pointing at the ground, then shot down toward the small girl.

If the moment had been caught in a single frame, it would have shown a mother, her youngest child in her arms, trying to run to her daughter, but being pushed back by her husband, who was desperately trying to run and save the girl. The brother seemed to be concentrating on catching his weapon as his sister stood with her eyes wide and her hand still raised. With her father too far away to reach her in time and her brother, the only one close enough to save her, seemingly oblivious to the danger she was it, it seemed that little Lien was doomed.

_I can't move...I'm going to die...!_ As the blade approached her, she shut her eyes.

She heard the sound of clanging of steel and felt a faint wind above her head. Lien opened her eyes as she looked up to find that her Kwan Dao had been deterred by the swift actions of her brother. He had caught the opposing blade with his own and then bucked it into the air. With a small leap, he caught it, then slammed both weapons into the ground, breathing heavily.

He slowly looked up at the spectators. His eyes focused on his father, waiting for his reaction. After a few moment, Ren subtly nodded at his son, signifying approval of his actions. The boy looked down and closed his eyes as Pin-Mei handed Níu-Năi to Rong and dashed over to Lien. She hugged her, then cradled her daughter's face in her hands.

"You have no idea how scared I was," she whispered. "Coming close to losing you again so soon...it's enough to kill me."

"Lien."

Pin-Mei turned to see Lien's savior coming up behind her. She smiled and hugged him as well.

"Ren, I can't thank you enough-,"

Her son slipped from her grasp. Instead, he walked over to Lien and slapped her across the face. The girl stumbled back a few steps, holding her left cheek, her eyes wide and fixed on her brother.

"You fool. I told you that you shouldn't learn the Kwan Dao. Someone like you will only end up killing themselves with something like that in their grasp." He looked down at her with scornful yellow eyes. "It's only because Father has developed a soft spot for you that he allowed you to train with us. If you continue this charade, you'll hurt yourself. What's worse, you'll hold me back more than you already have."

"Ren!" Pin-Mei cried as she came up behind him. She grabbed his wrist. "Don't hit your sister and don't talk like that towards her!" But her words were ignored as he shook her off.

"Promise me that you'll never touch a Kwan Dao again," he said firmly.

Lien looked frightened, but despite her quivering legs, tried to stand tall. "No. I...I like it so I'm gonna keep learning it."

His eyes narrowed and he shoved her to the ground. He snapped his fingers and his Kwan Dao sailed over to him. He grasped it and then pointed the blade at his sister. She flinched.

"See? You're too afraid to wield a weapon like this. You cower in fear even when I, your brother, point it at you." He nudged it closer to her.

"Ren, that's enough," his father's voice came from across the yard.

His son glanced at him, the dropped his tool and fell to his knees in front of Lien. He leaned forward to rest his forehead on her shoulder. She looked at him quizzically.

"Niisama, what are you doing?"

His voice came as a whisper. "I'm sorry I got angry. I was just scared. I don't want anything to happen to you. Just please...give up the Kwan Dao. I don't want to have to worry about you anymore."

Lien looked at the ground sadly. She knew that the only reason she had wanted to learn it was in order to gain respect from her father and brother. If one was telling her to give it up, there wasn't much she could do.

"...Okay, Niisama..."

* * *

A few days later, when the Tao family had returned home, the near-tragic incident had the adults on edge.

"Ren, put Houraiken away!"

"Get the hell out of my way, Pin-Mei! I'm ending this tonight! I'm not giving that little bitch any more chances to hurt our children!"

She grasped his wrist before he could pass her, then put her other hand on the fist that was tightly clenching the Tao family heirloom. "It could have just been a mistake! She was too far away to have anything to do with the accident!"

His eyes flashed angrily. "The charm on Lien's Kwan Dao flashed despite the fact that the sun was behind a patch of clouds," he said fiercely. "Huan gave Lien that charm, and, despite the fact that Lien is sometimes clumsy while doing her forms, she never messed up that badly, especially at the ending toss! The only logical explanation is that Huan cursed the charm before giving it to her, and caused the weapon to go haywire and try to kill her. I don't know about you, but I won't allow my daughter to be endangered like that again. She'd be dead by now if Ren hadn't been there to save her."

"But we don't know for sure if that's what caused it! It could just be a big-"

"ENOUGH! I'm so goddamn sick of you trying to find the good in people in situations like this!" Ren yelled. His voice went slightly high as he attempted to imitate her voice. "'I'm sure she didn't mean to kill our daughter, honest! I'm sure she's really a good person! Oh Ren you're such a villain for trying to protect our children from a cold-blooded killer! How could you?'"

As he went on, Pin-Mei's hands loosened until they had retracted in order come below her mouth. Tears slowly began filling her eyes. Ren scoffed at her.

"That's right, cry! Make me out to be the bad guy! I'm the cold-blooded one in this situation, aren't I? Shame on me!"

She shook her head furiously, then tried to reach out to him. "No...That's not it...Ren, just please..."

He slapped her hand away. "I'm done with this, Pin-Mei," he said in a low voice. "You were better when you were more obedient and didn't try to stop me from protecting my children. Stop this nonsense. I won't stand for it." He looked at his left hand, the one that held Houraiken, then briskly walked away, leaving her in the middle of the hall.

_What the hell is wrong with her?_ he thought. _Here I am, trying to protect the family, and she just decided that I'm picking on an innocent child that she herself regrets bringing into this house. Just when I thought I knew everything there is to know about her..._

The noise of straining metal stopped him. At first, he was just listening, trying to figure out what it was. Then he turned and his eyes zeroed in on the chandelier that hung over his wife. The bolts keeping it attached to the ceiling were breaking. He looked at the ceiling and then at Pin-Mei, who was staring at the ground in anguish. As the last of the bolts came undone, he started sprinting toward her.

Calling out to her would only cause panic, so he kept silent. The entire fixture of light fell from above as he lunged and captured her in his arms, sending them both to floor. He positioned his body over hers as the magnificent display of gold and light crashed to the floor only a few meters behind them. Glass shattered and flew about the room, whizzing by Ren's body and cutting it as Pin-Mei stared up at him, bewildered.

She didn't know if what she was seeing was real. Her head had hit the floor, and, unbeknownst to either of them, was bleeding a little. The pain it had caused in addition to the cloudy feeling she was experiencing was making her doubt the happenings around her. But when Ren went to sit up and a collection of glass rolled off his back, she knew that it was all too impossible to deny.

He sat there, looking down at her and breathing heavily, a few cuts on his face where the glass had reached him. She reached up to touch his wounds, allowing the blood to decorate her fingertips. She brought them down again so she, even with her current cloudy vision, could see them. He could see the pain in her eyes as she realized that her fingers were covered in blood.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "This is my fault."

He looked off to the side. "It's alright. Don't beat yourself up over it."

"If I hadn't-"

"I said don't beat yourself up over it."

She stopped, then looked down at herself. "You're right...I'm sorry."

There was a long pause. Hurried footsteps of servants could be heard from down the hall. No doubt coming in order to investigate the commotion. Finally, Ren sighed.

"I'm going to wait on Huan," he said.

Pin-Mei looked up at him, surprised.

"I'll wait until I can, without a doubt, say that she's out to hurt us. And at that time, I'll decide whether or not I'll kill her or simply throw her off a cliff."

She sat up and clutched him. "Thank you."

He sighed again. "You're so troublesome, you know that?"

She smiled. "Yes. I apologize."

One last sigh. "Let's just go to bed, alright?" She nodded against his chest.

* * *

As they settled in under the blankets, she refused to let him go.

"I promise I'm not going anywhere," he said in a tired voice.

"Last time you said that, I didn't see you for a month,"

"I mean it this time, alright?"

After a moment, she nodded, a few tears falling on his chest. "Just...let's not fight anymore, okay? I...I don't want anything to come out of it."

He punched her lightly. "After all we've been through, you think I'd give up on you so easily? Foolish woman."

"...Ren?"

He looked down at her. "Wha-?"

She kissed him. "I love you."

He smirked, slightly amazed that she was able to catch him off guard.

"I love you too."

As she nuzzled against his chest, Ren looked out of the corner of his eye at the light seeping in from under the door to their room. He saw the shadows of someone walking away.


	69. The Invader

**Notes: This takes place in early February of 2025, making Ren 39, Pin-Mei 37, the twins 17, and ****Níu-Năi 9 (try saying those three words ten times fast). OMG OLD PEOPLE! They can't stay 20 forever, sadly.**

**I had always known that I wanted Little Ren to be a captain on some sort of team. I had a few choices including table tennis and swimming. Both made me giggle and were quickly discarded. And yes, he has a sister complex. He gets aggravated when a boy casually touches her, but you could say that this is due to how he was forced to watch her get beat up to the point of bleeding when they were younger.**

**When I say that a certain student introduced in this chapter has grey hair, I mean it like Shu did or Allen does in D. Grey Man.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Sixty-Nine: The Invader**

* * *

"And so, after dining in Hell, the Spartans-" The teacher turned to see one of her students' arms up in air. "Yes, Ms. Mao, what is it?"

A pretty girl with long black hair gracefully lowered her arm and batted her eyelashes. "I'm so sorry to interrupt, Ms. Wong," she said with faux remorse. "But it would seem that my fellow student Lien has once again fallen asleep during your lecture."

The teacher looked across the room to see Lien with her head down on her desk, snoozing away. She sighed and looked to Ren. "Tao, wake up your sister, please."

Ren reached across to the desk at his left and shook Lien's shoulder. She sprang awake, sending the papers on her desk fluttering to the floor. Her teacher sighed and walked down the aisle of desks and picked one of the papers up. She looked it over, then rolled her eyes.

"This doesn't look like a Spartan," she said flatly.

Lien blushed as she grabbed the drawing and stuffed it in her binder. She looked up at her teacher sheepishly. "I'm sorry Mrs. Wong. It won't happen again."

"That's what you said last time," the teacher sighed. "Now, about the movie we watched the other day, after dining in Hell, where did the Spartans dine the night after?"

Lien blinked. "Um...Arby's?"

The class laughed. She sunk low in her chair as Mrs. Wong sighed once more, then returned to the front of the room. "There's a test tomorrow, Miss Tao. I think it would be in your best interest to have your brother review the material with you. You need this grade."

Lien looked at her desk. "Yes, I know." She heard a snicker and glanced up to see Mao Suān, the girl who had tattled on her, smirking back at her. She sighed, then slammed her forehead on her desk.

"Bitch."

* * *

"Um...Niisama?"

"What?"

"Can you give me your notes?"

Ren sighed and handed his bag to her. "If you want them, find them yourself. I have practice today and there will be a lot of complaints if I'm late."

Lien just smiled as she rummaged through his bag. "Yes, Captain."

Despite only being a second-year, Ren had been chosen as the captain of the martial arts team at the end of the previous school year. He treated it as more of a bother than anything else. There were times when Lien had to walk home by herself because he had to go to practice, and that wasn't something he was comfortable with.

Lien finally just put the bag on her shoulder. He eyed her.

"What do you think you're doing with my bag?"

"It's all organized, so I can't find the notes. I'm going to take it home and dump everything out. Once it's in a big pile, I'll be able to find it easily."

He sighed, then reached into the bag and effortlessly pulled out a folder labeled "Film Studies". He handed it to her and then took his bag back. "Now, if you're done, I'm going to go to practice."

As he turned to leave, a student bashed into him, sending him backwards and onto the floor. He looked up to see a girl with grey braids past her chest hurriedly trying to collect her books and other materials. She pushed them into a pile, as if she had trouble organizing them. Ren looked to his left and spied a pair of eyeglasses which he suspected belonged to her, and casually picked them up and handed them to her.

"Here."

"Oh, thank you! I can only see fuzzy shapes without them." She gratefully took them and put them on. "Really, thank you. I'm so sorry for-"

She froze as her eyes brought the image of the boy in front of her into focus. Her entire face went red as she quickly gathered her belongings. She stood and started bowing repeatedly.

"I'm so sorry Mr. Captain Sir! It was due to my foolishness that I bumped into you! Please accept my sincerest apologies!"

Ren sighed. "It's fine. Don't worry about it."

She just looked at him before she ran past him. Ren heard a thud, then a whimper and sighed again. He turned to see a group of popular girls, including Suān, around the one that had just run into Ren.

"You should be more careful," Suān said in a scolding tone. "What if Ren had hurt his arm because you made him fall and he couldn't practice anymore?" The girls around her began to pipe in with their own comments.

"Yeah! Then he couldn't be captain of the team!"

"The martial arts team has a meet this weekend – do you want them to lose because Ren wouldn't be able to fight?"

The girl shook her head furiously. "No, of course not! I-I was honestly just clumsy and I tripped. Mr. Tao just happened to be in the way..."

"Oh, so now it's HIS fault, is it?" Suān said, her hands on her hips. "Just who do you think you are, anyway?"

Lien watched them from afar, clutching her brother's folder angrily. As she seemed ready to stomp over to them, Ren blocked her with his arm and began walking toward the group.

"What's going on?" he said as if he were a preschool teacher dealing with children. The bespectacled girl jumped as she noticed he had come up behind her.

Suān seemed breathless as she positioned her folded hands under her chin, her eyes not leaving his face. "We were just telling Ai-Li here that she should be more careful so she doesn't bump into you again."

"Thank you, but I can take care of myself," he said coldly.

Suān's smile faded slightly. "We know, we were just helping."

He eyed them. "You want to help?" The girls nodded their heads furiously. He smirked. "Fine. I forgot my water at home. Can one of you go buy some for me?"

Their faces lit up. "Yes, Captain!" They scurried away in a cloud of dust toward the nearest vending machine. Ren scoffed at them.

"There's nothing I hate more than people who blindly follow others. It's a shame that they're so useful."

Ai-Li squirmed next to him. "You...didn't need to do that."

He turned to leave, giving her a small smile. "I know."

She bit her lip and ran off. Lien sighed as he approached her.

"You don't have to pretend to be so cool all the time. You can show some humanity once in a while like you show me, you know."

He glanced at her. "Why should I? Then they'll probably just chase me even more than they already do, and that means they'll just harass you more."

His sister tossed her head, her navy blue hair freely falling down her back. "I can deal with it. It's not like they do anything especially malicious."

"It doesn't matter. Humans are fallacious creatures. Just because of the fact that you're a girl and you're always around me, they'll treat you as their competition, despite the fact that we're related."

She giggled. "Then they should come home and harass Mom, too."

"You know Father would just kill them and be done with it if that happened."

"Yeah, I know." She wrapped her arm around his. "But I'll always be the woman you love most, right?"

He rolled his eyes. "Of course," he replied grimly, knowing that if he denied her she would just refuse to let go of him until she had gotten the answer she wanted.

"That girl was a third-year," she said suddenly. "Her uniform ribbon was blue."

"I know. I saw."

"Do you think that's why she was trying to be all tough and tell you that you didn't need to save her?"

"The question is whether or not I should really care."

"You're no fun."

"I'll play with you later," Ren grumbled as he shook her off. They were approaching the gym's mat room, where the martial arts team met, and he didn't want the boys to see his sister hanging on him as if they were going out. All the same, his eyes softened as he turned to her. "Be careful walking home, okay? If anything happens, come back here and get me, and I'll walk you home myself."

She stared at him, then laughed. "You're just like Papa sometimes. You both think I'm defenseless when I'm by myself." His eyes narrowed. "Okay, okay, I promise to come back if something happens."

"Good." He patted her on the head. "I'll see you tonight."

She fumed. "Just because I'm shorter than you doesn't mean you have to point it out."

He held in a chuckle. "It's an expression of endearment. Father does it all the time."

She threw his hand away. "Well stop it. When you're married, you can pat all the heads you want."

"IF."

"Papa will kill you if you don't."

"Just because he found is wun twu wub by our age doesn't mean you or I have to."

Before his sister could retort, he stepped into the matted room and closed the door. She could hear him yelling at his team to stop when they were doing, and then the sound of all of them falling onto the mat as Ren yelled "Hit!" She stared at the ground, then slowly turned to leave the school.

As she trekked up the hill toward the gates of Tao Castle, she thought of her brother's words.

_He's right. Our lives are so much different. Niisama and I...we have no idea what sort of hell they went through together. Niisama died, but I don't know if it compares, really. They never went into detail about it. Father would just tell us a version that I now realize was watered down so that it wouldn't scare us. Mama basically grew up without parents...Papa's childhood was worse..._

_But they never tell us how. Mama will start to say something, but then Papa will silence her. What doesn't he want us to know? What's the big deal? I know they were torn apart, but..._

She looked up to find that she had wandered into the backyard, where her father was going through his forms as always. As he put down his weapon to get a drink, he looked back and noticed her.

"Did you want something?" he asked rather impatiently.

Lien bit her lip as she dropped her bag and dashed at him. He rolled his eyes and dropped his milk bottle back into its basket as he planted his feet and prepared to receive her. She crashed into him, her arms instantly wrapping around his waist. Ren sighed and put his hand on her head.

"What's this about?"

She looked up at him innocently. "Nothing happened to you and Mama a long time ago, right? Before Niisama or I were born?"

"What?"

Her eyes studied his earnestly. This was one of the two people she looked up to most...He wouldn't lie to her, would he?

"Ewwww! I'm telling Mom you're cheating on her!"

They looked up to see Níu-Năi standing in the doorway snickering at them with malicious amber eyes. He ran inside the house shouting, "MOM! DAD'S CHEATING ON YOU AGAIN!"

A quiet "Oh my," could be heard as Pin-Mei made her way onto the porch. She glanced at her husband and daughter, then turned her face to hide it and began to shed fake tears into her sleeve.

"Oh Ren, how could you?" she sobbed.

Ren gave an annoyed sigh. "It stopped being funny the second time you did it."

She lowered her sleeve and smiled. "But Níu-Năi likes being the Fidelity Police."

"Well, teach him that his father isn't a louse who cheats on his wife. Don't encourage such behavior."

Her smile remained as she shrugged. "It's all in good fun, darling."

He flinched at the last word. "I told you not to call me that."

She giggled, then took her son's hand. "Come on, sweetheart, let's go see what the cooks are up to."

"Okay!" the boy cried as they went into the house.

"Mom really needs to let him know that hugging is okay," Lien sighed. She released him and he walked over to pick up his Kwan Dao.

"It's not my area," he said flatly. "I don't really care either way."

She looked at him, stunned. "Papa, how can you say something like that? Doesn't it bother you when he goes and tells mom you're being unfaithful to her?"

"No, it doesn't."

"Why?"

"Because it doesn't bother her. She knows that I wouldn't do that, and she knows especially my views on incest."

Lien blinked. "Which are...?"

"It doesn't matter since I know I'll never have to deal with it." He slammed the armory door shut and started to go into the castle. "Now come on, I'm sure you have homework to do."

Lien did as her father asked and trudged up to her room and fell onto the bed. She rolled over and stared up at the ceiling.

_You never answered my question...Did anything happen to you and Mom?_

She closed her eyes as she yawned and turned on her side.

_Just a little nap before homework. Then I'll give Niisama his notes back..._

* * *

"Lien...Lien! Wake up, you fool!"

Lien groggily opened her eyes and looked up to see her brother shaking her. "What is it?"

"You fell asleep, just like you always do. Now get up."

She rolled over and looked at her clock. "It's only 7:15."

"In the morning."

"WHAT?" She looked at it again to see "AM" lit up. "OH SHIT!"

Ren stepped back as she sprang off the bed and ran a brush through her hair. She dashed into the bathroom and threw water on her face, then brushed her teeth for about fifteen seconds and rushed back out again. As she ran for the door, Pin-Mei stopped her.

"Honey, can you come sit down for breakfast with us? We'd like to be able to see you before you go off to school." She smiled.

Lien looked at the door, then her mother, then sighed. "Okay..."

She followed her to the dining hall and sat down with her family. Her brother was already sitting across from her, calmly eating his rice as if he had all the time in the world. She looked at the tiny glass of milk next to him, a look of slight concern in her eyes.

He had resolved to drinking a little bit of milk each day, as he had read that supposedly his body would get used to it, and over time cure him of his allergy. There were days when he would get sick over it, but he refused to stop. He never said why he did it, but Pin-Mei seemed to understand and made no protest.

Lien never really understood why her mother insisted that they all eat breakfast together. No one ever spoke, except to ask that something be passed to them. Even Níu-Năi seemed to recognize that it was no time for jokes. After about five minutes, she stood, and with a quick goodbye, dashed out the door again.

Ren joined her as they walked toward school. She opened up her bag and looked in her folder.

"I can't believe this! I was just taking a nap before I did my homework and the next thing I know, it's morning," she whined. "This sucks so much! I was hoping to get a good homework grade this term, too..." She looked at the papers, confused. "What...? These are all done..."

"That's because when I went to get my notes, you were passed out on your bed, so I decided that I was going to do your work as well," Ren said casually.

"But-But why didn't you just wake me up? That way you wouldn't have had to do twice the work!"

"I was bored."

"_Bored_?"

He shrugged. "I came back from practice, did my homework, worked out, read for a while, took a shower, then I had nothing else to do, really,so I decided to help you out a little bit. Now maybe you'll feel guilty enough to actually do the work yourself."

She stared at the ground. The guilt was taking over already. "...That's what you said the last time you did my homework for me."

She stuffed the papers back into her bag and they walked in silence for a few minutes. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore.

"Niisama...Why are you always helping me like this?"

He looked at the sky, then back down again. "Maybe because I want to see you succeed. I don't like seeing you struggle, and neither does Father. I kept thinking, 'Maybe if I just give her a push, she'll be fine on her own, she won't need me anymore'. I'm not as coldblooded as you sometimes think I am. You're still my little sister, which means I'm responsible for you when our parents aren't around." He looked up to find her standing in front of him. "What?"

She dropped her bag and hugged him, sobbing into his chest. "I'm really sorry that I make you feel like you have to look out for me," she whimpered. "I know that you have enough to worry about, with all your own homework from the advanced classes and being captain and dealing with all those girls constantly fawning over you." She looked up at him, her eyes flooding in distress. "I'm so sorry, Niisama. I'll try harder, I promise! I know I'm stupid compared to you, but I'll still try!"

Ren sighed and lightly bopped her on top of her head with his fist. "Fool. You're not stupid. If you were, I probably wouldn't even bother trying to help you. You're smart, just in a different way."

He pushed her back by her shoulders slightly so he could wipe away he tears. He softened slightly.

"You know, Father found me doing your homework last night," he said.

"...How did he know it wasn't yours?"

Ren gave a small grin. "I was writing with my right hand. He knows I only do that to imitate your handwriting." He waved it off. "Anyway, instead of getting mad and telling me that I shouldn't help you like that, he told me about how he had to tutor Mother almost every night."

His sister's eyes widened. "He did?"

Ren nodded. "Apparently, she had difficulty in almost every subject, but especially Japanese. Since some of the kanji look similar, she would get confused and just end up writing Chinese instead."

"Papa must have been at his wits' end by her graduation."

"Actually, he said that he secretly enjoyed being able to help her. When she would 'get' something, he would just pat her head and say 'Good job', like she was a puppy or something. She'd get so embarrassed, blushing and hiding her face." His grin became slightly mischievous. "Besides, because he was helping her so much, she was indebted to him. But he said she always managed to 'make it up to him'." He walked past her, still grinning.

Lien whirled around, a skeptical look on her face. "What do you mean? What did she do for him?"

"Oh, I'm sure she did many things in order to compensate. Ask her yourself when we get home." _She isn't stupid, but she sure is slow._

When they entered the classroom, their classmates were buzzing with excitement.

"What the heck is all the noise about?" Lien wondered aloud as she took her seat.

"Let's find out." Ren calmly walked over to Suān and her group. "What's going on?"

The girls froze. "We're fine!" they chirped.

He dug his fist deep into the pocket of his blazer, trying to make sure it didn't suddenly jump out and attack the nearest female. "That's great. But what's everyone talking about?"

"There's a new student!" a girl cried.

"Yeah, from Japan!"

"Maybe it's a boy!"

Suān silenced them. "Even if it is, we'll always stay loyal to you, Ren!" She smiled while clasping her hands to her heart.

His fist dug even deeper. "That's nice." He quickly swiveled and headed back to his seat next to Lien.

"How did it go?" she asked, knowing how much he hated dealing with his fangirls.

"I'm about ready to just drink a gallon of milk and die, but at least they were somewhat useful."

"O RLY?"

"What have I told you about chatspeak?"

She sighed. "Belongs on the screen, not on the tongue." She straightened. "So, what did you find out?"

"Apparently there's an exchange student from Japan transferring into our class today. No big deal."

"Do you think it's-!"

"It's not Seta, don't get your hopes up. This guy probably can't speak any Chinese."

"Sweet, we can play charades."

"...Hopeless..."

There was a ruckus as the students dashed to their desks upon hearing their teacher coming down the hall. She entered and stood at the front of the room, then seemed to beckon to someone outside the room.

"Come on, no need to be shy, now."

A boy in a grey blazered school uniform stiffly walked in to stand at her left. His dark brown hair was spiked up with a piece rebelling and flopping over at the top of his forehead. He seemed mildly disinterested in what his new teacher was saying, and instead opted to look around the room at his peers, who stared back at him like he was an animal at the zoo.

"Class, this is Meihou Tadashi. He's come to us from Hokkaido, Japan. I'm counting on you all to make him feel welcome and help him since he hasn't mastered Chinese yet."

Everyone stood up at their desks. "Welcome." They sat down again.

The teacher smiled, then looked around the room. "Now, let's see...where should we put you..."

A girl pushed her friend from her desk and onto the floor. "There's a free seat here!"

"Ms. Ye, that's Shang-Xiang's seat and you know it." She looked at Lien, who blinked. "There's a free seat behind Ms. Tao. Please raise your hand so Tadashi knows who you are. There, now go sit with her and she'll help you get situated." Tadashi bowed to the teacher and walked to the back of the room where the Tao twins sat.

Ren eyed him as he passed. He hadn't anticipated anything like this. _I'll have to watch him closely._

Tadashi locked eyes with Lien as he passed. She felt awkward, but tried to smile warmly. He sat in his chair and placed his bag on the desk.

"Now, let's start class. First, let's review the history homework from last night..."

Lien clenched her fist in determination. _CHANCE! I'll shine today, tomorrow, and everyday after that!_

She heard a soft giggle from behind her and looked to see her new neighbor smirking at her. Slightly embarrassed, she turned back around and tried to concentrate on her worksheet, eagerly awaiting her chance to be called on. Ren glared at the boy, who finally turned his head to stare back at him. He grinned, giving him something that looked like a sloppy two-finger salute.

"Yo."

Oh, the many things Ren would have liked to say back to him, chief among them being, "Don't talk to me," and, "Stay away from my sister." He was fluent in Japanese – his father had seen to that – but making scenes wasn't a cherished pastime.

As they moved on to film studies, Ren watched his sister nod off and finally lean over her desk in slumber. He rolled his eyes and sighed quietly, knowing that she was, once again, a glutton for punishment. He heard his new classmate stir, and turned to see him poking the sleeping girl in the back with the eraser of his pencil, presumably in an effort to wake her up.

"Stop it. Don't wake her up. She needs to learn the consequences of her actions," he whispered harshly in Japanese.

Tadashi glanced at him, then went back to poking Lien. Ren gritted his teeth.

"I said stop it." He didn't. "I said stop, goddammit!" He reached over to grab his wrist, but before he could, the boy wound up and stabbed Lien with the eraser.

She sprang awake with an audible yelp and minor flailing, causing some of her papers to go onto the floor. The class stared at her, and she shrunk in her seat.

"Yes, Ms. Tao? Do you have something you'd like to contribute to the discussion?" Ms. Wong asked.

Her student's face instantly turned red. She had no idea what they had been talking about. "I...I...In my opinion...um..."

She was interrupted by the noise of Tadashi standing up behind her. "I kick her by sorry," he said in broken Chinese. "Dumb action. Very sorry." He bowed.

"So cute!" a few girls squealed.

His teacher looked flustered, unsure of whether to reprimand a new student so quickly. "It's okay, Mr. Meihou," she said finally. "Just be more careful from now on, alright?"

"Understand." He went to sit down, then put his hand on Lien's shoulder. "Very sorry. No hate?"

She looked back at him with a smile. "No, I don't hate you," she whispered in Japanese. "It's okay." Then she turned her attention back to her teacher as if nothing had happened.

Ren kept staring at his sister's shoulder. This kid, this FOREIGNER, whom he had barely known for two hours had already crossed the line and laid a hand on his sister, territory that only their family and very few others could venture into.

_How dare you...How dare you...No one outside our family is allowed to lay a hand on her, and here you are thinking you can just pat her whenever you want to...You bastard..._

There was a snapping sound. The class turned and looked at Ren, whose pencil had mysteriously broken in half in his hand. Lien timidly opened her pencil case, fished out a new writing utensil, and then offered it to him.

"Here, Niisama..." she whispered, thinking he was mad that she had fallen asleep again. She knew he had broken the pencil himself and was clearly disturbed by it, but she tried to smile, hoping that he would forgive her.

He stared at it for a moment before taking it from her with a mumbled "Thank you." When he looked up, his nemesis was looking back at him, as if studying his actions. Ren dug his right hand into the pocket of his blazer.

After class, he watched as Tadashi tapped Lien on the shoulder. She turned to see him with his right elbow on the desk, his jaw resting on his fist.

"What?" she asked. He didn't answer, just continued to stare at her. She grinned nervously. "Did you need something?"

He smiled. "Interesting eyes."

She blushed, not used to receiving compliments. "T-Thank you! My Dad gave them to me." She froze. "I mean, he has them and I have them – He didn't take his out and give them to me, that'd just be weird...It's a genetic thing! Niisama has them too and um, my little brother sort of has him but they're a darker yellow so it's not really the same...My Mom has black eyes, but she's the only one – she – she jokes that it's because Papa's so controlling that none of her genes were able to have a say in anything since she's not as outspoken as he is and um..."

He chuckled. "Cute."

Ren's crosshairs finally locked on. He quickly stood up. "Meihou, you're coming with me." He grabbed the boy by his collar and half-dragged him to the door.

"Tour?" the boy asked, seemingly confused.

Ren's eyes narrowed. "Yes...Tour."

He dragged him out into the courtyard, quickly looking around to make sure no one was there. When he knew that they were alone, he fisted the front of his prey's uniform and slammed him against the brick wall. Tadashi flinched and moved his hand to seemingly rub the back of his head.

"Dangerous tour..."

Ren fumed and pushed him harder against the wall. "Drop the act, you lying bastard. I know you can understand me. You didn't ask _one question_ during any of the lectures today. You understood every word, and your notes prove it."

Tadashi lost his innocent eyes in favor of braver ones. He grinned.

"There's no fooling you is there, Tao Ren?" he said with a smirk, his Chinese suddenly perfect. "You discovered me even quicker than I thought you would."

"I really don't care about this little game of yours. All I care about is what you want with Lien," Ren said in a low, cold voice. "I don't like you talking to her, much less TOUCHING her."

"I'm just being nice to her, making conversation...you know, being friendly. You don't seem to make an effort to talk to her. She's probably lonely."

"That's none of your concern. She comes to talk to me when she needs help. If she needed me, she'd tell me. She's my responsibility – NOT YOURS."

Tadashi looked down and grinned. "Did you ever think that maybe if you woke her up when she falls asleep in class that she might do even a little bit better in school? After all, at least she'd be able to listen to the teacher and take notes."

Ren paused, then tightened his grip. "How I treat my sister is my business and mine alone. There is no room for you to interfere."

The grin grew. "I don't get why you're so anal about her. Being overly protective is usually the **father's** job, isn't it? Are you trying to be his proxy or something? Is that why you feel the need to call out anyone who even speaks to her? Or maybe something in your past is eating at you and making you think you have to protect her?"

All Ren could do was grit his teeth. He had always felt responsible for how his sister had been bloodied at the hands of their classmates so long ago. If only he had been stronger, he kept telling himself, if only he had been stronger, he could have protected her and prevented the beating she received.

Sure, at home, his father was the one who was responsible for protecting Lien, as well as Pin-Mei and himself. He was more than strong enough to defend his family if need be. But at school, with their father so far away, the responsibility came to rest on the young heir's shoulders. It was up to him and him alone to protect his sister.

"What makes you think I'm out to get you? Maybe I'm just the opposite," the boy went on. "Don't you think it would help and maybe even be a little refreshing to have an ally in a crazy place like this? I mean, you can't _always_ be around when the fangirls attack."

Ren narrowed his eyes. He had a point. With his commitment to the martial arts team, it was impossible for him to watch over Lien after school. However, he was well aware that this could also be a trap. He let go of his classmate and watched him drop to the ground. The foreigner held his head and looked up as the young Tao overshadowed him.

"I'm giving you **ONE** chance to get on my good side. Succeed, and I'll _consider_ letting you hang around Lien. Fail..." Tadashi looked down to see the thumb of Ren's left hand sequentially pushing down each of fingers, causing them to crack. "...You'll have to worry about waking yourself more than her."

He turned and walked away, leaving the transfer student on the ground. Tadashi sighed as he stood and brushed himself off.

"I know she means a lot to you," he said when Ren was out of earshot. "But remember: Lien's your _sister -_ not someone you can take for yourself and have and love forever. That's why I'm here. Don't worry..." His eyes flashed. "...I'll take good care of her for you."


	70. I'll Make You Love Me

Well, in college I'm in an East Asian Studies course. We learned that for a young person to call their elder siblings or relatives (including parents) by their names is very rude. So, I guess that says a lot about Ren, considering how he sometimes calls En by his given name instead "father" or the like.

Also, in Confucianism, _Ren_ is the most important virtue, meaning benevolence and humanity (though the word we'd be looking for is _Lian_ if we wanted it to refer to Ren directly). _Yi_, loyalty and righteousness, is also a virtue. I honestly didn't know this while choosing his name O.o We also studied Daoism/Taoism, so when my teacher wrote "Dao/Tao" on the board in kanji, I squealed since the character is written the same as Ren's surname. -fangirls- Okay, that's enough of that. At least you hopefully actually learned something from my dumb notes this time :D

**Notes: Please excuse the limited use of "fangirl Japanese" in this chapter.**

**By this time, I think we can assume that Ren is now the head of the family, so any mention of scions or heirs now refer to Ren II.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy: I'll Make You Love Me**

* * *

"I don't like him," Ren said as he took a fighting stance. His father did the same.

"You were never very trusting to begin with."

His son charged at him and threw a punch at his face, which he dodged by sidestepping to the left. He grabbed the outstretched arm and hit his son with a palm-heel strike to the cheek. He paused.

"Interesting..."

"What?"

The elder Ren landed a roundhouse kick to his ribs, sending him to the ground. He stood over him.

"How you refuse to let others in-" He moved to execute a low punch, but his prey rolled to the side, escaping him.

The boy kick-flipped off the ground to regain his stance. He charged, looking to perform a side chop to the neck, but again his father evaded the attack. Ren pulled his son's arm, causing him to bend over and expose his back.

"Yet, with me you're wide open."

He elbowed him on the back as he kneed his stomach. The boy hunched over, falling to his knees and assuming the fetal position on the ground. Ren took a few steps back to admire his handiwork.

"You're harsh in tone and personality, but soft on the battlefield, and for that I blame myself."

After a few gasps and deep breaths, the younger Ren looked up, slight pain still visible on his face. "What does this have to do with my problem?"

His father sighed and shook his head. "What I'm saying is yes, be on your guard, but until he does something genuinely suspicious, don't go for his throat. Keep your hand raised and in formation, but don't let it leave your side just yet."

Ren sat for a moment clenching his fists and gritting his teeth. "But doesn't his interest in Lien bother you?-!" he cried suddenly.

The man closed his eyes for a moment in thought. "I suppose it does slightly. I don't want a repeat of what happened a few years ago."

Lien's brother bowed his head, remembering the hurtful incident. "I don't either." He slammed his fist on the ground and looked away. "Damn that Seta! If he'd stop being such a wuss and confess to her, we wouldn't have to deal with this!"

"Think about who his father is; it took him nearly four years to propose to Rong. It took me about a week."

There was silence. Ren finally sighed. "If you want me to judge him for myself, get him to come over and I'll test him. Will you feel more secure about letting him be around Lien if I approve of him?"

"I guess." He looked away as he got up. His father grabbed his shoulder and turned him around.

"It took me a while to realize this myself, but there's no shame in asking for help," he said. "It by no means makes you weak."

The twin looked down. "Maybe."

* * *

The next day at school, Tadashi wasted no time in getting Lien's attention.

"I found this on my way to school and it made me think of you. Here, I want you to have it." He handed her a lily.

She took it nervously. "But my name means 'lotus'..." she started to say.

"There's always tomorrow, isn't there?" He smiled at her. She did also, but hers was a little more awkward. Tadashi glanced to his right to see Ren glaring at him.

"You're here," Ren said, holding his hand as high as his nose. "You need to be here." He brought it down past his chest. Tadashi frowned, but knew that if he wanted to stick around, he would have to obey him.

"Tadashi-_kun_!"

The boy turned to see a small group of girls behind him. They were all staring at him with googly eyes. He wasn't pleased, knowing that he was on the spot, especially with Ren analyzing his every move. All the same, he put on a smile.

"What can I do for you ladies?"

The giggled and squealed. "Can you say something for us in Japanese?"

He grinned mischievously. "Of course." He thought for a moment, then chose a phrase. "Urusai, baka kuso atama."

The girls clapped and squealed again. "Thank you!"

"You sound so cute when you speak Japanese!"

"You're so cute, Tadashi-_kun_."

"Thank you," he replied, his fake grin not worn out yet.

"You're welcome! See you!" They ran off.

Ren tried to hold back a snicker. "'Shut up, you stupid shit heads'? How mean."

The Japanese boy shrugged. "We're not in Japan, so they shouldn't use "kun" with me. Even if we were, I barely know them, and I never let people who I didn't know call me "Tadashi-kun". They're going to find out what happens when they use words when they have no idea what they mean." He leaned over to the girl seated in front of him. "But _you_ can call me Tadashi-kun if you want, Lien."

Lien just breathed in the aroma of the flower she had been given. "You said that you found this on your way to school. Where do you live?"

He seemed slightly discouraged, but brightened his smile to hide it. "Just a half mile from here. Not too far."

"With your parents?"

Tadashi's smile turned sad. "No. By myself. My father died in an accident last year, and my mom left when I was very young, so I barely remember anything about her. My relatives think she's dead. So it's just me in an apartment my mom supposedly left behind for me."

"Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you upset or anything! I just didn't know! I'm so sorry, Tadashi!" she cried, arms flailing.

He smiled at her. "You're so kind. I wonder if my mom was as kind as you are..."

She blushed, then stood up. "I-I'm going to go buy some water!" she cried, then ran out of the room.

Ren sighed. "Can you tone it down a little? You're going to overwhelm her – and I won't like that."

"Okay, okay," his classmate relented, putting his arms up in front of him.

"She may be apprehensive about accepting your charms, anyway. It's already hurt her once."

At this, Tadashi tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

Ren looked down, unsure if he should be revealing such a private incident so quickly. Finally, he looked up again. "In seventh grade, a boy in our class asked her out," he began, his eyes seemingly full of regret. "She refused. She didn't even know him that well. He asked her again the next day, and she hesitated, but still said no. That night, my mother and I told her that if this boy was asking so much, his feelings were probably genuine. He asked her again the next day. She said yes.

"But a few days later, the boy was with a group of his friends when Lien came down the hall. The boy asked her again if she would go out with him, barely able to keep a straight face. Then he and his friends huddled together and laughed."

_Ren looked up from his book as Lien burst into the library and collapsed on top of him, her face covered in tears. He made her kneel on the floor and he joined her._

"_What's wrong? Why are you crying?"_

"_Liar...You said his feelings were genuine," she whispered. _

_He stared at her, not sure if he could believe what she was insinuating. _

"_Now it hurts..." She clutched her chest. "It hurts so much..." She choked and hiccuped a few times before looking at him with spiteful eyes. Her voice was so raspy and worn that he could barely hear her. "...I hate you...I hate him...I hate all boys...All of them except Papa...He's the only one who loves me..." She crumbled and hid her face._

"It had been a joke," Tadashi whispered quietly.

Ren nodded. "Since then, she hasn't even shown any interest in finding a boyfriend. That incident ruined it for her." He glared at Meihou. "That's why I say if you hurt her, I'll kill you."

The boy nodded. "I understand. I guess I never thought people would go so low."

"When people know about the type of family you come from, for them, there is no 'low'."

"Why? What's wrong with your family?" He paused. "ARE YOUR PARENTS GAY?"

"NO! My parents are happily heterosexual, thank-you-very-much." He grinned as he remembered his father's words. "As a matter of fact, why don't you come over for dinner sometime and meet them? You can see for yourself."

Tadashi's eyes widened as he hit his hand with the bottom of his fist. "Great idea!" He rubbed his chin in thought. "A good boyfriend should go and introduce himself to the girl's parents." He nodded, approving the idea in his mind.

"Listen you..."

"I said, get out of my way!"

They turned their heads toward the door leading to the hallway where the voice had come from.

"Not until we're done with you!"

"Yeah! You already have Ren for a brother – now you want Tadashi for yourself, too?"

"You're so selfish Lien!"

"No, listen, he's just -"

"Shut up!"

Ren stood and went to dash out of the room when Tadashi jumped over his desk and joined him. When they made it to the hall, Ren's eyes went cold as he saw Lien being held against the wall, holding her hair as a group of girls, led by Suān, pulled on it mercilessly.

"HEY!" They all froze and stared at him. "Let go of her. NOW." They obeyed. "Now, apologize."

"Get on your knees and beg for it," Tadashi said as he came up behind him.

The girls stared at each other, then after a nod from their leader, they got down on their knees. "We're sorry! P-Please forgive us! We promise we won't pull your hair again!"

"It's okay..." Lien whispered, dumbfounded at the power the two boys had over her enemies.

Tadashi sighed and shook his head. "Gee, Ren, I dunno...I don't think this is good enough..."

Ren took on a similar tone. "Strangely enough, I have to agree with you." He stared at the girls with such cold eyes that they shivered. "Promise to never touch her again – period."

"We promise to never touch you again..." the girls repeated in timid whispers.

Ren went over to his sister and put his hand on her shoulder. "Good. Now get back to class," he said darkly. The girls whimpered and scurried back into the room. He glared at them even after they were out of sight. When he returned his gaze, Tadashi was standing in front of Lien.

"You okay?"

She nodded dumbly. He gave her a small smile as he reached into the breast pocket of his uniform's blazer and produced a small plastic comb.

"You might want to wash it a little or at least run it under some hot water, but you can use it to fix your hair."

"Is...it really that bad?"

"It's just puffing out a little where they pulled it," Ren said as he lightly touched a piece of hair.

"Oh, I see..." She fidgeted, then turned to hug her brother. "Thanks...I'm sorry that you had to get involved."

He rolled his eyes and sighed as he lightly hugged her back and patted her head. "Fool. I did it because I wanted to."

She smiled. "Still, thank you" She turned to head to the bathroom to groom herself, but then she seemed to remember that Tadashi was there as well. After a few moment, she awkwardly touched his arm. "Thank you," she said with an equally awkward smile, then ran off.

The two boys stared after her in silence. Suddenly, Tadashi let out a squeal and pumped his fist in the air.

"Yes! She touched me! It's only been two days and she touched me!" He did a touchdown dance in a circle before Ren decided he had had enough and gave him a swift kick to the rear, sending him to the floor. The boy moaned, then stood, rubbing the wounded area. "Oi, you didn't need to kick my ass over it."

"Don't get too comfortable just because she touched you," Ren said with folded arms. "You still have to get the approval of our father before I'll even think about letting you near her again."

"That's right...What kind of guy is your old man anyway?"

"The kind that would kill you if he heard you say that. He doesn't look old either; he still looks like he's still in his twenties because of how well he takes care of himself."

"I see..." He thought for a moment. "I heard you and Lien talking once – Why do you call him 'Father' while she just calls him 'Papa'?"

Ren shrugged. "She's just what you'd call a 'daddy's girl'. She'll go sit on his lap while he's reading and hug him even though he doesn't usually like it. He hates the random kisses she gives him, complete with the "mwahh!" sound effect, but he doesn't get mad at her as often. I guess it puts me at a disadvantage whenever he has to settle our disputes."

Tadashi tilted his head. "Why is that?"

"He holds me to a higher standard because I'm the oldest and he was the one who taught me how to act as I got older. Everything I know came from him."

"You mean to say that you're not a 'Mama's boy'?"

Ren paused as he remembered the smiling face of his former self. "No. My father didn't want me to be weak like that."

Tadashi sighed. "Jeez...Your poor mom..."

"Shut up. She knows what she means to all of us." He shifted. "My father is rarely openly affectionate. He'd rather express his feelings in private or by doing things that show love. I guess I got that aspect of my personality from him. But my mother's been living with it since she was even younger than us, so she knows that we care about her, even if we don't tell her so. Besides, our little brother is more than happy to accept any hugs and kisses she wishes to give."

"That may be so, but don't you think she'd be happy to get a hug once in a while? More importantly, one from the first child that she brought into this world?" He shook his head sadly. "I'd give anything to switch places with you."

"Why? So you can be a creep and be around Lien all the time?"

"No." He looked up. "You have the ability to decide whether or not to hug your mom...I don't."

With that, he went back into the classroom.

* * *

"Since Valentine's Day is coming up, we're going to do a mini-unit on how this occasion is celebrated around the world," Ms. Wong said as she passed out a red mini-notebook to each of her students.

There was a mixture of squeals and groans. Ren sighed. Again this year his desk would be crowded by girls eager to have their chocolates accepted by him. He remembered being quite surprised when he was first offered some a few years ago.

"_Ummm...Ren? C-Can I talk to you somewhere?"_

_Ren looked up from his book to see a classmate of his with long brown curly hair who he recognized as the girl who had sat behind him until the seating change a few days before. She seemed to be holding something behind her back. His eyes narrowed. No one ever spoke to him or Lien – why now? __He followed her out into the hall all the same, knowing that once the matter was dealt with, he could go back to reading in peace._

"_What is it?" he asked impatiently. _

_The girl blushed and took out a heart-shaped box of chocolates from behind her back. Ren stared at them speechless._

"_I...I love you! Please go out with me!" she cried._

_So many thoughts were racing through his mind. 'I can't possibly say yes to this. I don't even remember this girl's name. I have to decline gracefully...'_

"_I'm sorry, but I can't accept them. I know you must have worked hard to make those chocolates, and that in itself says a lot about what a passionate person you are, but that devotion is for someone else. I'm sorry."_

_She stared at him, then started crying._

"_I promise you, someday you'll find the person that will love you just as much as you love them."_

The thought of having to go through that again this year made him want to drink a gallon of milk and stay home sick.

Amidst the groans, Lien clapped her fingertips together. She loved Valentine's Day because it was the one day where she had an excuse to show her brother how much she loved him. She always gave him special chocolates that she made with powdered milk so that they were safe for him to eat. He always accepted them with a hug and a smile, thanking her for changing the recipe to fit his needs.

Lien and Pin-Mei always made their chocolates together. However, Lien never saw her mother give anything to her father, nor him giving anything to her. After careful deliberation, she had concluded that her father was a shy person deep down and was embarrassed at the thought of showing affection for his wife in front of his children, and therefore only showed love when the two adults were alone. Her brother knew that he just didn't like putting on shows.

"Ehhh? No White Day?" Tadashi whined as he leaned back in his chair. "What a rip-off."

Lien looked at him curiously. "White Day?"

"It's a holiday where men basically reciprocate any gifts given to them by girls on Valentine's Day by buying them something or taking them somewhere." Ren explained, his voice devoid of any excitement.

"Yeah, that's right," Tadashi said. He grinned sweetly and rested his head on his fist. "But if there's no White Day here, I guess I'll just have to give you my gift on Valentine's Day."

She quickly snapped her head away. "That won't be necessary...I-I already know who I'm giving my chocolates to, anyway."

He chuckled. "I don't mind not getting anything. Just tell me what your favorite color is so I can get you something nice."

She hesitated, looking at Ren, who rolled his eyes.

"...White," she said finally.

"Ah, white. The color of purity." He winked at her. "Okay, it's a pure white present for the pure maiden."

Lien, frowned, a hurt look in her eyes. She hid her face by putting it on her desk and folding her arms over it.

"She thinks you're making fun of her," Ren said in a low voice.

"TAO! NO SLEEPING!" Ms. Wong yelled from across the room.

Lien picked her head up to reveal slightly reddened eyes. Ren glared at the boy seated behind her.

"Leave her alone for a while, okay?" He gazed at her, as if trying to read her mind. "She's frustrated because she doesn't really know if she can trust you yet."

Tadashi looked at her sympathetically. "Is there anything I can do to let her know that it's okay to trust me?"

Ren shook his head. "Just let her be. She'll get overloaded if you keep going."

"...Alright."

* * *

After classes ended and Ren had gone off to practice, Tadashi ran to catch up with Lien.

"Lien, listen-"

"Don't talk to me."

"What? Come on, can't you at least hear me out?"

She opened the school's main door and looked back and him, her eyes full of scorn. "Don't you get it? I'm not going to be part of your little game. Act your age and not your shoe size. We're in high school, only a few steps away from being out in the real world. You can't play with people's hearts like this!"

"I'm not! I've meant everything I've said! What makes you think I'm toying with you?"

"You've only known me for two days and you're acting like some Casablana towards me, offering to buy me gifts and bringing me flowers..."

He stared at her. "Don't you mean 'Casanova'?"

Her face creased in frustration, thinking he was once again making a fool out of her. She threw the door open and ran out of the building. He followed her.

"I said leave me alone!"

"Not until you accept that I'm serious about you, Tao Lien!" He caught up with her and grabbed her wrist. She stopped and snapped backwards, her back hitting his chest. His arms draped over her shoulders, hugging her neck. "I promise you that I'm not trying to make you cry – it's just the opposite. I want nothing more than to see you smile."

But she was already quivering, a few of her tears falling on his hands.

"Ren told me about what those boys did to you a few years ago. I promise you that I'm not like them. I really do like you."

"Yeah? And what about me? What is it that makes you like me so much?" she snapped, trying to wipe some of her tears away.

He smiled. "You're just adorable. You're kind, you're funny, you're modest, you're creative..." He turned her around to face him. "Wow..."

"What?"

He smiled again. "You're even beautiful when you cry."

She jerked away from him, turning around. "L-Liar...People are ugly when they cry...Their faces get all wrinkly and their eyes get all red and puffy..."

"I know. That's why you're amazing."

"LIAR!"

He wrapped his arms around her again. "Is it a crime that just seeing these qualities in you attracted me from the moment we met?"

"I...I don't love you. I love someone else," she whispered.

"That's fine. I'll still be here when they make you cry, like a knight that always comes to the aid of his princess. I promise."

She started crying harder. "Do you have any idea how guilty that makes me feel? Doesn't it bother you that I don't have any feelings for you?"

He was silent for a moment. "Well, yeah, a little, but when you care about someone, you want them to be happy above all else. It doesn't matter if you're with them or not. As long as they're happy."

"You're...You're so stupid..."

"No...I'm hopeless."

* * *

Ren patted his face with his towel as he left practice. He was exhausted not only because of how hard he had worked, but because his teammates had seemed too preoccupied with other things to concentrate on their routines. He had to kick their asses before they realized he wasn't going to tolerate idle minds on his team.

As he walked down the hall toward the school's main entrance, he heard the sound of feet gently hitting the tiled floor as well as small grunts of frustration. He looked down one of the halls to see the girl who had run into him a couple days ago hopping up and down in an effort to reach something on a rafter above her. Failure seemed imminent.

"You just can't seem to stay out of trouble, can you?" he said stoically as he approached her.

She flinched at the sound of his voice and turned around. Her face instantly turned red from embarrassment. "Be-Be quiet! It's not my fault!"

He looked up to see her school bag balancing on the top of the rafter. "That's not the best place for that."

"I know! I didn't put it there!" she cried. "Some boys were upset about a rule that the student council passed concerning where they could store their sports bags when they're not practicing or at a meet. And since I'm the council president, they took it out on me by "storing" it in a most inconvenient spot."

Ren was staring up at the rafter, studying it. "Hold this," he commanded, shoving his duffel bag against her chest. She looked at him, confused.

"W-Wait, captain!"

"Do you want your bag or not?" he growled impatiently.

She looked at the ground. "Well, I need it to do my homework..."

"Then don't complain."

He rubbed his palms together before jumping and gripping the rafter. He hoisted his torso over it, grabbed the bag, and jumped down again. The girl stared at him in awe.

"That was amazing."

"Whatever, just take the bag." He held it by his index and middle finger and offered it to her. She slowly took it from him. "Ai-Li, was it?"

"Yes..."

"Let's see if you can stay out of trouble for more than two days," he said with a smirk.

Her face turned red again. "I can't help it!" she cried.

He grinned minimally, then picked up his bag and headed for the door again. Ai-Li stared after him for a few moments, then suddenly remembered her manners.

"Thank you, Captain!"

Without looking back at her, he waved her off.

* * *

"Nice hair," Lien said smirking as she watched a classmate of Níu-Năi's braid his long dark green hair.

The boy blushed. "Shut up. Chun wanted to do this."

She looked to the small girl with long lavender hair seated behind him. The girl, Chun, was a classmate of his that seemed to have a weird fascination with him, but especially with his hair. Even when he told her of his shamanic background as a means of scaring her off, she only seemed more enthralled. Just his luck. At nine, he had his first fangirl.

As she braided the last of his hair, she sat back and admired her work, happy as a clam. "All done, honey," she said, beaming.

"Don't call me that!" He shouted as he looked back at her.

She lunged and hugged him. "You look **SO** cute!"

Níu-Năi looked at his sister. "Help me..." he whimpered.

Lien laughed and turned away. "Sorry, I've got homework!" she said before skipping away.

He reached out to her. "No! Sis! Come back!" He finally accepted his fate and fell flat on the floor. His "girlfriend" took this as a sign that he wanted to cuddle and hugged him tighter.

"Those two are so funny," Lien said as she walked into the living room where Pin-Mei was sitting reading a book. "Why does he keep inviting her over if she tortures him so much?"

Her mother giggled. "I think there's just something about her that attracts him, whether it be emotionally...or spiritually. Maybe it's because she's one of few people that accept him at school, who knows? Emotions like that just can't be explained in words."

"I see..."

As silence filled the room, Lien thought about Tadashi's words.

"Mama?" she said suddenly.

She looked up from her book. "What is it?"

"If...If Papa didn't love you, would you still treat him the same way you do now? I mean, would you still want to do everything you possibly could for him, or would you just stop caring?"

Pin-Mei thought for a moment. "If he didn't love me, I'd probably do more for him than I do now."

"What? Why?"

"Because we all want to be noticed and loved. If he didn't love me, I'd work harder to earn praise or even half a smile." She put on a smile of her own. "When people want others to love them, they sometimes do the most extreme things, or even many small things every chance they get in order to earn approval. I've never had to deal with someone reacting that way to me, but I'd like to think that I would be kind to them and smile."

"But what if you can't stand what they're doing? What if they just keep doing things for you and you don't feel that you can do things back?"

Pin-Mei looked at her. "Be kind to him and accept him as a friend."

"But-!"

"Think about it. If he's working _so hard_ to impress you and get you to love him, don't you think that maybe it's because he's lonely? Maybe he'd even be happy with you telling him that you appreciate what he does for you. Do something to make him smile."

Lien sat in an armchair, staring at the floor. "Am I pretty?"

Her mother nodded. "Of course you are. You get your looks from your father, after all."

"I'm serious!"

"Lien, I know you may disagree, but looks really don't matter when you're looking for someone to love you. Take myself for instance: My face was slightly round, I was as flat as a board, and I was so thin that if your father hadn't treated me so much when we went out to eat I probably would have looked like a skeleton. No exactly a dream girl, right?"

"I refuse to say anything on the grounds it may incriminate me."

She laughed. "You're always so thoughtful."

Lien blushed. "Maybe..."

They heard the door slam, signifying that her brother was home. He walked in, a tired look in his eyes.

"Welcome home, sweetheart," Pin-Mei said cheerfully. "How was practice?"

He heaved a sigh. "The usual, except for a few devoted members, I'm surrounded by imbeciles."

"Oh? What makes you say that?"

"They're just getting all paranoid about the meet on Friday. We're fighting a team that has won the regional championship a number of times, so they're convinced we're going to lose. Useless cowards..."

"Well, just do your best, Ren." She brought her fist as high as her shoulder and shook it in support.

"Threaten push-ups and leg lifts!" Lien cried.

"Just suggest to the adviser that there are a few problem members. Give them a warning and then throw them off if they continue. Simple," his father said as he strolled into the room.

The younger Ren inhaled. "I don't know. Maybe if we lose the meet. Otherwise, I'll just train the few that actually believe in the team."

There was a scream. Moments later, Níu-Năi ran into the room and jumped into his mother's lap, quivering.

"What is it, honey? Is something wrong?" she asked, concerned.

He pointed to the doorway, where Chun had appeared, a huge smile on her face.

"SHE KISSED ME!" he cried.

Chun shrugged, showing not a hint of regret. "It's his own fault for being so cute."

Ren walked over to his son, removed him from his wife's lap, and placed him on the ground. "You're too old for that. Now go on."

"B-B-BUT WHAT IF SHE DOES IT AGAIN?"

"You'll live, trust me."

"I'll give him a cootie shot!" Lien turned to her brother. "Just like I gave you one. You were so scared that you were going to die when I kissed your cheek. You were a riot!"

Ren rolled his eyes. He never liked to be reminded of his change. "Yes, yes. I was naïve, but I'm not like that anymore, and I never will be, so I won't be falling for your stupid tricks."

_Speaking of stupid..._

"Anyway, I invited a friend over for dinner. He's a new student, so I thought he'd feel more welcome if we got to know him. He's coming over tomorrow night." He and his father exchanged glances. Lien stared at the floor, an unreadable expression on her face.

Pin-Mei just stared at him. "You...invited someone over?"

"That's what I said."

She was silent for a moment, then jumped up with an excited squeal.

"KYAAA! This is so great! You two _never_ invite people over!" She clapped her hands together. "Huan!" she called.

The twenty year-old maid appeared. "Yes, mistress?"

"We're going to be having company over tomorrow night for dinner, so could you go tell the cooks to prepare their best meals for that night?"

There was a flash of scorn, but she smiled brightly. "Of course." She left the room. Ren stared after her. There was still something about her that he didn't like.

"Oh I can't wait! What should I wear? Kyaaa!" she practically danced out of the room. Her family stared after her.

"Is she really almost forty?" Lien said finally.

The elder Ren sighed and rubbed his forehead. "I ask myself the same question every night."

Just then, the phone rang.

"I'll get it," the heir said getting up. He went into the study and picked up the receiver. "Hello?"

"Hey, Ren! How goes it?"

"Oh, hi, Seta." He hid a small smile from himself. Despite the changes he had gone through, one of the things that hadn't changed was how close he and Seta were. "So to what do I owe the pleasure of this phone call?"

"Well, um, I want to come over next week."

"That shouldn't be a problem. What day?"

"...The fourteenth..."

Ren smirked. "You finally have the guts?"

On the other end, Seta was bright red. "Sh-Shut up! You've never had to confess your feelings to anyone! You have no idea how nerve wracking it is!"

"Point." He paused. "But you better not chicken out this time. You don't want someone else to snatch her because you were too much of a coward to do so yourself."

A long, dramatic pause.

"Wait...What are you talking about?"

"I'm just saying make your move or lose out." He was trying to decide whether or not he should outwardly tell him of his apparent rival for Lien's affection.

"There's...someone else, isn't there?"

Ren could almost hear his friend's heart sink. He knew that if he didn't say something quick, cracking might be next.

"She doesn't seem interested, but feelings can change, you know? Just do it when you get here, and hopefully she'll accept."

"...Right..."

He thought for a moment, then smirked.

"Hey, Seta..."

"Yeah?"

"Why don't you call tomorrow night, too?"


	71. Lien's Prince

Long time, no see, ne? Well, I had midterms, which are pure murder when you're in college. Plus, I had A LOT to fit into this chapter. It's pretty damn long, too, so I think you all can forgive me. Right...?

Well, I wasn't _completely_ dormant. After much delay, the first chapter of _Tao Yi Gaiden_ is online! If anything at all, I recommend that you read the first chapter only to meet some of the new characters, as they may or may not be referenced at some point before the end of the story. Also, I posted _A Foolish Offering_, a oneshot for a claim I have for Ren and Pin-Mei in a Livejournal writing challenge community. It takes place at the end of the manga canon, so it has a couple spoilers for that. But I don't plan on doing too many stories in the manga cannon. That one is just to amuse myself in a "what if" sense. Isn't self-indulgence what fanfiction and fanart are based on anyway? :)

Okay, now, on to the voices of our teenaged heroes. After much consideration, and a talk with a close friend of mine, we decided that Paku Romi still does the voice for adult Ren, and would do the voice for Ren II as well. Hey, they did it in _DragonBall Z_ with Goku's seiyuu voicing him and both his sons. Lien is Houko Kuwashima, who voiced Clare in _Claymore_, and is currently voicing Tomoyo in _Clannad_. Ironically, I had picked Daisuke Sakaguchi to voice Tadashi, who actively...erm..."pursues" Tomoyo as Sunohara, even before watching _Clannad_. He also voiced Quiche in _Tokyo Mew Mew_ and Shonen Bat in _Paranoia Agent_.

**Notes: This chapter references the book **_**Flowers in the Attic **_**by V.C. Andrews (another favorite book of mine). **

**Lei-Gong, as you may remember, is the god of thunder.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-One: Lien's Prince**

* * *

"So, can you tell me more about your mom?" Tadashi asked as the Tao twins led him up the path to their home.

"She's very kind," Ren said finally, his eyes suddenly soft. "Even if I went to her now, at seventeen, and wanted comfort, she'd treat me like I was child and want me to sit in her lap so she could hold me."

Lien nodded. "She worries about us a lot. She just wants us all to be happy...Papa says that she's still naïve, even at her age. Mama and Papa are kind of opposites, but they love each other very much."

"How long have they been together?"

The twins looked at each other. "I suck at math," Lien said, dumping the responsibility on her brother.

Ren was silent for a moment, the wheels in his head turning. "Twenty-three years."

Tadashi's eyes widened. "Woah! Did they meet in high school or something? Like, high school sweethearts?"

"Arranged marriage," they both said.

"And they actually like each other?"

"That's what we said."

"Okay we're here," Ren announced.

Tadashi looked up at the castle. "Shit, you guys live in a palace?"

"Bason says we used to have much bigger ones." He turned to him before he could ask who Bason was. "Watch yourself in this house. It's in your best interest."

"Okay, okay."

Ren smirked as he opened the double doors and they all went inside. No sooner had they dropped their bags inside did Pin-Mei appear.

"Welcome home," she said smiling. She looked past her children and saw Tadashi, causing her to run over to them out of pure excitement. "This must be your friend!"

_Not exactly_, Ren thought, but he wasn't going to be the one to wipe that smile off her face. "Right. This is Tadashi. Tadashi, this is my mother, Pin-Mei."

Tadashi looked the woman over for a moment. A loose braid rested to the right of her neck on top of purple and gold robes. "Nice to meet you," he said bowing.

"Oh my, what manners!" she giggled. She smiled and gave him a welcoming nod. "My husband is most likely still in the weight room. I'll go get him so you can meet him." She turned to leave. "Just make yourself at home!" she called as she ran off.

Tadashi stared after her. "She's...really kind...and motherly." He smiled. "She seemed excited, too."

"That's because we almost never invite people over. She's happy because she thinks it means we have friends," Ren explained. When the boy looked at him with bright eyes, he turned his nose up. "I never said we were."

"Ren! The kids are home! Come and greet them!"

Tadashi looked from the direction of the voice, then to Ren and back again. "But you're right here...wha...?"

"You'll see."

Just then, Ren and emerged from the hallway with Pin-Mei attached to his arm. Their son gestured to him as they approached.

"And this is my father." He ended the sentence. He never called him by his name, and his father rarely did as well, even in introductions.

"-Ren!" Pin-Mei butted in.

Tadashi stood there, dumbfounded. Frantically, he began pointing at the both of them.

"Y-Y-You both have the same name! Y-You look exactly alike!"

Ren sighed as he gently removed Pin-Mei from his arm. "We've got ourselves a smart one."

"And the same dry sense of humor!"

Lien groaned. "Come on, Tadashi. _Anyone _can see that they have different color hair." She pointed to her brother. "Purple." Then to her father. "Blue. Plus, Niisama is just a little shorter."

Tadashi studied the two men and found what she said to be true. "Did you, like, clone him or something?"

"Of course not!" the two men yelled.

"And whose idea was it to name you Ren?"

Pin-Mei raised her hand shyly. "Mine...I just wanted him to be strong like his father." Her shoulders dropped and she hung her head. "I'm sorry if you dislike your name, Ren. It was selfish of me to give it to you in order to satisfy myself."

Her son shook his head. "I know you did it because you love the both of us." He looked at Lien. "Well, all three, seeing as how Lien basically has his name as well." He turned back to Pin-Mei. "So I don't mind."

She smiled. "I'm glad."

"Well, come on, I'll show you around," Ren continued, wanting to nip the emotional bud his mother had formed. He walked out of the hallway and up the staircase, Lien and Tadashi in tow.

"He seems nice," Pin-Mei said after they had left.

Ren scoffed. "Being nice and being stupid aren't the same thing." He turned to leave. "We'll see his true colors at dinner, I suppose." She was glancing in the direction her children had gone in. He snapped his fingers and she smiled and walked over to him.

"But isn't this great? The only people outside our family that come to visit are our friends from Japan. For them to have a friend here as well...It just makes me so happy."

He turned his head. "We'll see how loyal he is soon enough."

* * *

The twins led their guest upstairs, stopping in front of Lien's door.

"Why do we have to hang out in _my_ room?"

"Because I don't want him in mine."

He opened the door and they all went in and sat down on her bed. Tadashi looked around and saw sketchbooks stacked along the wall. A glass cabinet which hung near them was filled with pencils, colored pencils, charcoal, erasers, and other various artistic instruments. It almost looked like a weapon arsenal.

"You draw?" he asked.

She nodded slowly.

"She does it during class, mostly," Ren explained.

"Art class?"

"No. Regular class, like Film Studies or Japanese."

Lien smiled weakly. "I'm not smart like Ren is, so I have to have _some_ other talent to make up for it," she said as she gazed at some of her drawings on the wall. Many of them seemed to be portraits of her brother doing various things – lifting weights, sparring with their father, stretching, studying, even sleeping. She glanced at him, about to open her mouth again.

"Yes, I still have the ones you drew of me – the ones you were willing to part with, that is," he said before she had the chance to ask. "They're up in my room, as happy as inanimate objects can be."

"You didn't paint over that picture of all of us that I drew on the wall before I moved out, did you?"

"No, I didn't want you to throw a fit like father did when he found it." A small smirk appeared on his face and she giggled.

Tadashi looked at them. "You two used to share a room?"

They turned to him, almost as if they had forgotten he was there.

"Well, we're twins, and since we were the first born, our mom thought it was natural for us to sleep together. Papa separated us a few years ago," Lien explained

He froze, hoping that she wasn't insinuating the scary thought that had formed in his mind. "...How much is a few?"

"About four," Ren said. "Our father wanted to separate us sooner, but Mother was always able to persuade him to wait a little longer. When we turned thirteen, however, he physically picked up Lien and threw her in this room."

"That is kinda late," Tadashi admitted. "I mean, you could have ended up like those kids in Flowers in the Attic."

Lien cocked her head. "What's that ab-?"

"Shut up, Meihou, unless you want to find arsenic on your meat buns," Ren said fiercely. He knew exactly what he had been referring to.

"Dude, I'm just saying..."

"And I'm just saying that if you want to leave this house alive, you'll shut up and never let a stupid-ass comment like that leave your mouth again."

Silence. They stared each other down. Finally, Tadashi relented.

"You're right. It was stupid of me to say that...I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted."

Lien hadn't read the book, which had been an assigned reading book for Ren's advanced Literature class a few years before. She looked back and forth between them.

"Wait, what about the book? What is Tadashi-?"

"Supper is ready," Huan said from the other side of the door.

Ignoring Lien's questions, the three made their way to the dining hall. They sat on one side of the table, Lien in the middle with Ren and Tadashi on either side of her. Pin-Mei sat across from her as Ren took a seat across from his son (normally he would sit at the head, Tadashi's presence disrupted their setup). Niu-Nai soon dashed in, jumping into the seat opposite of the guest. He stared at him.

"Who are you?" There was a small pause as Tadashi blinked at him. "—Niichan's new punching bag?" he added before the boy across from him could answer.

"Honey, he's our guest tonight, so be nice to him or he won't come back," Pin-Mei chided. She smiled warmly at Tadashi, who gave an embarrassed smile back.

"You're not Chinese," the boy said bluntly.

Tadashi was frozen for a moment, but then quickly regained his composure. "Right you are! I'm Japanese."

"Are you one of those _odakus_?"

"...What?"

"I think he means _otaku_," the heir chimed in.

"No! I'm not!"

"A yanki?"

"No! What makes you think-!"

He stopped as Huan leaned over to set his dinner in front of him. He seemed frozen as he stared at her profile, seemingly in awe. As she stood upright again, she smiled at him, then moved on to serve the Rens, then Niu-Nai, Pin-Mei, and finally Lien. He was staring at her all the while. When her job was done, Pin-Mei thanked her, and she bowed and left the room. As she passed Tadashi, their eyes met before she turned away.

Tadashi fumbled with a small metal box as he pulled it out of his blazer. He pressed a clip on the side and it opened. He looked inside it, his eyes wide as he looked back to where Huan had been, then at the thin box, then back again.

"QUESTION!"

Tadashi jumped and turned back to the table, quickly shoving the slim case back into his pocket. The Tao head was piercing him with cold eyes.

"A-ANSWER!" he cried, suddenly remembering the purpose of his visit.

"Why did you come here?"

He stiffened. "H-Here? I…" _Confidence!_ He cleared his throat. "I came because Ren invi-"

"I know he invited you into our home. I want to know why a young Japanese boy like you moved to a country where you can easily be scorned because of your race."

He stopped. "I moved here because my late mother left behind a house for me nearby, and I needed to get away from where my Dad had died…"

"And when was this?" His voice showed no hint of sympathy.

"My mom left when I was only a month old, and my dad was gunned down while taking the subway home from work late last year…"

"You…You grew up without a mom?"

They turned to see Pin-Mei gazing at him with tears in her eyes. Her family looked at each other and sighed. _As if he hadn't already won her over..._

"I did, too," she whispered. "I know how painful it is…" She rested her hand on the table as she used the other to wipe her eyes. Another covered hers, and she looked up to see Tadashi smiling at her.

"You're even more angelic than I imagined. Now I can see where Lien gets it from...I know I wouldn't mind having you for a mother," he said in an airy voice.

By this point, Pin-Mei's face was completely red. She slowly turned to look at her husband. "Ren...Can we-?"

"**NO!**" he bellowed along with the twins.

Ren calmly removed the boy's hand from his wife's. She touched her cheek, still under her guest's spell. Not amused, Ren turned his attention back to the subject of his interrogation.

"I hear you do similar things to Lien," he said. "Do you do this with _all_ women? I'm not too fond of womanizers."

"No, of course not," Tadashi replied, a smile still on his face. "There's just something about Lien that affects me like nothing or no one else has or can...Maybe it's those amazing eyes she has."

"So you've flirted with him?" He motioned to his younger self.

"N-No! I-"

"So you would flirt with me, then? I assure it wouldn't be the first time it's happened, but it would be your last."

Tadashi's head was spinning. He was quickly learning why his classmate was so calculating. If he even breathed at the wrong moment, it could end up hurting him.

Lien looked back and forth between them, wondering why Tadashi was being interrogated so much. She was torn between wanting to help him and sitting back and enjoying the show. The boy straightened.

"No, while I can see why your wife is so attracted to you, I myself am not charmed by men. So no, Lien is the only person to receive words like that from me."

Ren frowned. If he wanted to see this boy crack, he would have to try harder. "Don't you feel foolish saying such words when they mean nothing to her?"

Meihou's sad smile returned. "Maybe, but I think that, even just a little, it might make her happy to know that someone outside her family loves her."

"'Loves her'?"

"That's right."

"'Love' is a very strong word. I'm not sure that it's one you should be using in this situation."

"It's the only word that comes to mind."

Ren stared him down as the phone rang.

"I'll get it," the heir said. He smirked as he picked up the phone. "Hello? OH, HI SETA!" he cried, his voice exaggerated. "How nice of you to call. What's up? Oh? Yeah, she's here." He turned to look at his sister and held the phone out to her. "Here, Seta wants to talk to you."

She smiled as she got up and took the phone, then leaned against the wall so her back was partially turned. "Wait, who is this? Could it really be Seta who never calls me anymore?" She giggled. "I'm just kidding, you goof. It hasn't been _that_ long."

Ren took his seat back at the table. He looked over and saw Tadashi trying to look at Lien out of the corner of his eye. The table was cleared and Ren and Pin-Mei left the three teens by themselves. The guest shifted in his chair uncomfortably.

"So...Who's this Seta girl?"

"I never said Seta was a girl."

"But there's an 'a' at the end, and since it's usually girls who have names like that, I just assumed that she was one."

"Well, it's a boy."

Tadashi's eyes seemed to flash for a moment as he looked over his shoulder. "Really, now? Is he from school?"

"No he lives in Japan. Our parents are friends."

"Oh, I see..."

Almost as if on cue, Lien squealed, lightly stomping her feet as she did so. "You're coming over next week? What day?...I see...Well, you better bring me flowers, since you're a guy and everything. Ha-ha! I'm just kidding. You know I wouldn't ask you to do that."

Ren glanced at Tadashi again. He smirked. Tadashi's eyes seemed to be widened in anger as they were fixed on the phone. Every time she giggled, laughed, or even smiled, he grew more and more tense.

"How long has she known him?" he asked coldly.

"About seventeen years," Ren replied casually. "He told me he wants to come see her because he wants to tell her something. I wonder what that is..."

Tadashi stared at him, a look of horror on his face. His eyes said that he hadn't expected any competition. Now he knew that he had to make Lien fall in love with him by next week, or he might lose her forever. He bit the tip of his thumb as his mind raced.

_Another Japanese boy as my competition? What's so great about him? What does he have that I don't have? She doesn't actually love someone who lives so far away, does she?_

"What's the matter, Tadashi-_kun_?" Ren said tauntingly. "Have you realized that Lien has no intention of returning your feelings? When has she ever been that happy talking to _you_?"

The boy's eyes focused on him, suddenly realizing the real reason why Ren had invited him. He had brought him here to humiliate him, to get him to give up on his sister. For a moment, he let a sinking feeling consume him, then he straightened.

"You can only wait for so long," he said, a small smirk on his face. "Whoever this Seta person is, if he wants Lien that badly, he better work fast. Because when it comes to love, Meihou Tadashi is the master."

Ren glanced at him. "You think you can overcome a friendship with a seventeen year history?"

"There's only one way to find out."

Before he could reply, Lien held the phone out to him.

"Seta wants to talk to you."

He looked at the phone before grabbing it and leaving the room. Níu-Năi fidgeted in his chair.

"This is boring..." He jumped up and ran over to Lien. "Neechan, let's go outside and do something!"

She looked down at him with a nervous smile. "Normally I would, really, but we have somebody over, so I can't really ignore him."

Tadashi stood up. "I'll play with you, squirt," he said as he took off his uniform jacket.

Níu-Năi stared at him. "You will?"

"Yeah, sure. Why not?"

The little boy's amber eyes lit up. "Yeah! Awesome!" He grabbed his new playmate by the arm and began leading him outside, passing his father as they left the room.

"Where are you two going?" he asked in a sharp tone.

His son grinned at him. "Aibou said that he'll play a game with me!" He tugged on the guest. "Let's go!" They vanished outside.

Ren stared after them. _Aibou, huh?_ He shook his head, a small smirk on his face. Lien approached him, wringing her hands.

"Papa...are you and Niisama being mean to Tadashi on purpose?" she asked quietly.

Her father studied her, trying to read her face – especially her eyes – to see if they were hiding any deeper emotions.

"No, I'm not at least," he said finally. "I just want to make sure he doesn't have an ill intentions for either of you. Your brother may have his own plans, but I'm confident that he's just doing it to make sure you don't get hurt."

Lien blushed at this and turned her away from him. "Yeah...Well I...I just don't want him to go too far, that's all."

Ren put his hand on her head. "His self control is much better than when he was a child, so I'm sure he won't..."

* * *

Later on, Pin-Mei walked outside to find her youngest son leaning against a tree sleeping. Tadashi was sitting on a nearby rock, his legs crossed, looking at his small metal frame from his jacket once again. She smiled as she made her way over to him.

"What are you looking at?" she asked.

He jumped, not expecting to be spoken to, then looked back at his treasure. "This is something very special to me," he whispered.

"May I see it?"

He silently turned the case so she could see what was inside. Pin-Mei's smile faded, then slowly turned to a look of horror. She grabbed it from his hand and turned, staring at it almost in confusion.

Tadashi nervously reached out to her. "Mrs. Tao? May I please have that back? What's wrong?"

She turned and stared at him, then grabbed his hand and began running inside and down the halls. All the while, she looked around to make sure no one was watching, clutching Tadashi's treasure against her chest.

He was dumbfounded. "What is it? Where are we going?"

She didn't answer, only continued to run until she finally flung open a door and pulled him inside. She shut the door tightly and locked it, then rushed over to a nearby bookcase and threw books off the shelves until she had found the one she wanted. As she feverishly flipped through the pages, he could see from its contents that it was a photo album.

_Why is she so upset?_

Finally, she froze, as if under a spell, then turned the album around in order to allow him to look at the pictures. Tadashi's eyes widened.

"H...How can that be? Why do they...?"

Pin-Mei gripped the book. "This is someone who has caused my family a lot of pain. A horrible monster with no heart at all." She set the book on a desk next to her, then looked at the photo Tadashi kept in the metal case. "I don't know why this is, but you can't let Ren see it."

"Which one?"

"Neither of them. My son was educated in the incident involving this person, so I'm sure that he would ruthlessly interrogate you if he saw the picture." She handed it back to him. "I don't know what's going on, but I won't judge you based on this. I...I'm sure it's just a coincidence..." She smiled nervously.

* * *

"So how did that dude from your school react?"

"He was pissed at the very least, but I think it's safe to say that he feels threatened."

"What about your dad? What does he think of him?"

"He's frustrated that he hasn't been able to make him crack, but I have faith in him."

Silence. "You...really look up to your old man, ne?"

"...That's one way you could put it, I guess."

"Niisama! Mama says to get off the phone!" Lien called from the other room.

"Alright!" he called back. "I have to go, but I'll keep you up to date."

"Right...Thanks..."

"Just don't think of him as a threat, and don't worry about it. Lien's not so naïve that she would just suddenly like him."

"I know...She...She's smarter than that."

"Good. So don't sound so depressing. Bye."

He hung up the phone and returned to the family room where he found Tadashi, Níu-Năi, Lien, and Pin-Mei sitting around a board game.

"Just in time," Lien said looking up at him. "We need a banker."

"I never said I was playing."

"But you're the only one who can do it practically without thinking!"

"Ask Father to be the banker."

"Meanie! You know he never plays board games with us!" She clasped her hands together and gave him her well-honed sad puppy eyes. "Please, Niisama?"

Níu-Năi came up beside her. "Yeah, Niichan, please?"

Tadashi joined them. "C'mon, Ren! We're desperate!"

He stared at them, then finally sighed. "Alright, alright. I'll be your goddamn banker."

She smiled. "Thank you."

He grumbled as he sat down and began counting the money in preparation for distributing it among the players. Before it could begin, however, the Tao head leaned into the room.

"I found this little brat wandering the halls. Include her in your little game so she doesn't bother me," he said as he ushered in the spirit of a girl with long, light green hair, around eight or ten.

As she floated over and plopped herself between Lien and Tadashi, Ren looked up at his father as he sorted the colorful currency. They exchanged knowing glances, though they weren't smirks – not in the least. Ren knew his father was going to drop a bombshell on their guest - one that could end up hurting them, Lien especially.

Sure enough, Tadashi's face went pale. He seemed to be trying to ignore it, but he kept looking at it out of the corner of his eye.

Pin-Mei smiled nervously, knowing in the back of her mind what was going on. "Okay, sweetheart, what's your name?"

"Bo," the girl replied in a monotone voice.

"Okay, Bo, which piece would you like to be?" The girl pointed at a small metal bear trap, and Pin-Mei placed it at the starting point.

They took turned rolling a pair of dice as they moved around the board, taking over internet businesses and shutting down small, family-owned ones. After Ren flagged Tadashi for landing on his YouTube property, it was Bo's turn. The little girl moved to pick up the die, but found that they couldn't be gripped by her intangible hands. She sat back, emotionless.

"...Does this mean I lose?"

"Of course not, silly," Lien said as she tossed the black and white cubes for her. "Okay, nine, so..." She reached for Bo's playing piece when Tadashi finally jumped with a yelp.

"W-w-w-w-why is a ghost playing with us? I-Is this place haunted or something? Huh?"

There was silence. Lien was looking at the floor, almost in shame. Pin-Mei was still smiling awkwardly, but Ren just took a pink piece of money from the small spirit.

"You landed on my property."

Tadashi was looking at them frantically. "Don't you realize that she's DEAD?"

"Of course," Ren said stoically. "We've been around this since the day we were born."

"Wh-What? Wh-why would you-?"

"WE'RE SHAMANS!" Lien screamed suddenly.

"Sh...Shamans...?"

"Yeah, that's right – SHAMANS! We're a family of Shamans and have been since as far back as the Zhou Dynasty's Spring and Autumn era in 722 BC! We talk to ghosts and spirits and kill babies for satanic rituals and curse whole towns and we'll eat your soul if you don't get out now!" By now, tears had filled her eyes as her fists clenched. "WE'RE FREAKS OKAY? JUST SCORN US AND HATE US LIKE THE REST OF CHINA DOES!" She began sobbing, so worked up that she was gasping for air.

Uneasy, Tadashi looked to his classmate and Pin-Mei. She was still trying to smile.

"She…Lien was just kidding about the babies and satanic rituals and the cursing whole towns…We really don't do things like that. Now, we're just living here peacefully, passing our abilities down to Ren and Lien as we occasionally help lead restless spirits to the peace of the afterlife," she explained. She looked down sadly. "But we are feared and scoffed at now. Because of technology there isn't much need for shamans anymore. The children of shamans are misunderstood and teased by their peers. They never have many friends."

"But how do they know the kids are shamans?" Tadashi asked, his face still pale. It was obvious that the news of his precious Lien having such a background had put him in a state of shock.

"Their parents. They usually go to school together at one point. Their parents told them, and _their _parents told them, and _their _parents told _them_ and so on. The children are basically taught that shamans are weird and demonic creatures and that they shouldn't associate with them."

"But then…why is Ren so popular?"

Pin-Mei glanced at her son. He didn't look up. She looked to the mortal again. "I suppose you could call it a gender curse. With his looks, the girls seemingly forget his lineage and accept him. But when you're a girl, you're not so lucky…"

"It only goes to show how utterly stupid they are," Ren said in a low voice.

She looked at her hands on her knees. "The truth is…you're the first person from their school to come over – to come near this house at all." She gave a small smile. "I really can't tell you how happy it made me to know that you wanted to spend time with them, especially in a place you weren't familiar with as opposed to school." She clasped her hands together in a pleading fashion. "Please don't turn your back on my children, I beg you! I don't want to see them suffer because of one aspect of their life – something that they should be proud of! There's so much more to them than that! They're so kind and considerate of others…they're loyal untill the bitter end! They're still the same Ren and Lien you went to school with today! They haven't changed between then and now! Please continue your friendship with them! Please! I beg of you!"

Tadashi stared at her, finding that he was now sitting between two crying women. His gaze trailed to the ground, deep in thought.

"You…can speak with the dead?" he said finally, his question directed at Lien.

"…Ye…Yeah…" she replied, her voice still shaky from her outburst. The next thing she knew, he was grabbing her shoulder and shaking her, an only semi-sane look on his face.

"So if my mom was dead you could find her, right?"

She blinked at him. "I…guess I could…" She stared at him. "You're not afraid?"

"No."

"You don't think I'm a freak?"

"No, of course not! It just makes you even more special than you already are." He smiled at her warmly. "I can't think of a single thing that could make me love you any less."

Despite herself, Lien smiled. Ren glanced up from his kiddy money casually.

_Damn it._

"That person in your pocket isn't among the dead," Bo said stoically.

Tadashi's eyes widened. "You mean…she's still alive?"

"That's right."

He looked at Lien. "This means I still have a chance to find her!"

Lien smiled back at him. "I'm glad."

"Yes, Tadashi, that's great…" Pin-Mei said. But her smile was, again, uneasy.

Ren saw some movement out of the corner of his eye and looked up to see Huan seemingly eavesdropping from the doorframe.

"Do you have any business here, Huan?" he said in a sharp voice.

She jumped and looked into the room nervously. "I-I was just going to ask if Bocchama wanted any tea."

His eyes narrowed. "No. You're dismissed," he said quickly, knowing she had to obey.

"I'll have some," Tadashi said smiling at her.

She smiled back. "Okay, I'll be right back, then." She glared at Ren and left the room. Tadashi watched her the whole way.

"GAME! GAME! GAME!" Niu-Nai said pounding his fists on the floor.

Ren bopped him on the head. "Grow up. You're not two, so use your words."

"Niichan, that hurt!" the boy whined. His brother glared at him and he shrunk. He looked at Pin-Mei. "Mommy, can we start playing again?"

"Of course! Let's continue."

They resumed their game. Lien seemed happier, like a large weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Soon, she was treating her admirer like an old friend.

"That's another 350 for me!" she cried as Tadashi landed on her most expensive property for the eleventh time that night.

"But I don't have that!" he cried, holding up three twenties and a fifty.

"Then you have to give me one of _your_ properties!"

She grinned as he handed her the money along with a property card. Then he smiled. "It's late. I should get going."

Her smile faded. "Okay…"

The three got up and the twins led Tadashi to the door.

"See you tomorrow," he said as he grabbed his bag.

"Yeah, see ya." She waved at him as he left, shutting the door behind him. When it was silent, she turned to her brother. "Niisama, do you think he meant what he said?"

"You mean not caring that we're shamans?"

"Yeah…"

"Who knows? We'll find out tomorrow at school. If he can't accept it, screw him."

"I guess you're right…" Her shoulders drooped and she turned and went upstairs to her room.

"That was a rather interesting reaction," his father said coming up behind him.

"His or hers?"

"Both, actually." He unfolded his arms. "I know this probably isn't the answer you wanted, but I think he's fine. It _is_ rather odd for him to claim to love someone he's only known for a short time, but it doesn't seem like there's anything malicious behind it."

They studied each other. The young heir finally put his hands in his pockets. "I guess I can only trust your judgment."

"No one said you have to. That's just my opinion, which is what you wanted. What you decide to do is your decision alone."

"…I still don't trust him." He walked past him, intending to follow his sister's lead and go to his room.

"Don't act like I don't care who I give Lien to," Ren said in a cold voice, causing his son to stop. "I've made it clear that Seta is my first choice, but if she ultimately chooses to be with someone else, I won't force her to be with him. I _do_ have her happiness at heart."

The boy was silent for a moment.

"Weren't you and Mother forced to be with each other?"

Ren paused. "Initially, yes, we were. But then her father told me that if we didn't love each other, he wouldn't force it. I'm employing that same tactic. The same goes for you. You really should—"

"Good night," his son cut in, not wanting to hear about any potential fiancées. He went upstairs, disappearing from sight. Ren watched him as he left.

"—take your time so you can find someone that you'll truly be happy with," he finished quietly.

* * *

"Here, a lotus, just like I promised," Tadashi said, handing Lien a pink flower.

She smiled softly and took it from him. "Thank you."

"Thanks for having me over last night. I had a really great time."

"You're welcome."

Ren drummed his fingers on his desk. "Aren't you forgetting who invited you?"

Tadashi turned to him, removing another flower from his blazer. "Of course not. Here, a token of my gratitude." He held it out to him. His classmate narrowed his eyes.

"I don't like guys, thanks."

"Just kidding. Here." He handed him a bar of chocolate. The recipient studied it, then finally took it.

"Thanks."

Lien peeked at the package form over his shoulder. The label clearly read "Milk chocolate". She looked uneasy. "Niisama...are you sure you can have that?"

"Of course I can. Why wouldn't it?"

"Because you're-"

"Did you do your homework, Lien?" he asked slyly as he dropped the bar into his book bag.

She froze. "O-Of course! Why wouldn't I?" But she found it impossible to make eye contact with either of the boys.

"Liar," they both said flatly. Ren sighed and handed her his folder.

"Just do it quickly."

She blushed. "Thanks, Niisama."

"Ren," Tadashi said. "Why don't we all go to the library so you and I can tutor her? That way she can do her own homework."

A moment of silence. He still wasn't all that interested in spending time with the foreigner.

"Alright," he said finally, despite his better judgment.

"Don't you have a meet today?" Lien asked, looking up from her math sheet.

"Get back to work. The teacher will be here any minute." She whimpered and continued scribbling. "Anyway, no, that's on Friday; not for a few days."

"Great! Study group GO!" Tadashi said with a small punch.

"Why do I feel like I'm going to be the only one doing the tutoring?"

* * *

But Meihou proved him wrong. While there were times when he didn't know the material perfectly, he did much better than Ren had initially given him credit for. Watching him patiently guide Lien through calculus problems made him feel like he was watching a completely different person.

Another thing he noticed was how comfortable Lien seemed during their session. Even when he had to lean over her to correct the occasional mistakes in Tadashi's explanations, she just blushed and carried on with a small smile.

This eventually came to an end, and they parted on their way home. Lien was staring at the ground, a blush still grazing her cheeks. He hated her facial expressions. Many of them were hard, if not impossible, for him to read. He decided that, for once, he had to be straightforward.

"So, what do you think about Tadashi after last night?"

She jumped, the blush gone. "He...He's better than I originally thought," she said slowly. "I think he's more tolerable...And I guess I'm beginning to enjoy his company."

Silence. She finally looked up at him, only to find that he was staring at her. She shrunk back, clearly intimidated.

"What?" she cried.

"Nothing," he said as he faced forward again. "I'm just wondering what's going on in that little head of yours."

"N-Nothing! None of your business!" She clutched her head. "GET OUT OF MY BRAIN!"

He chuckled. "Too late. I've already used my newly-developed telepathy skills on you. If you don't start doing your school work, I'm going to go tell the boy you like just how you feel about him."

She looked horrified, her eyes wide. "N...No...You can't! You're lying! You don't have that ability! You don't!" She grabbed her head again, covering her face.

Ren stared at her. "Why are you getting so upset? I was just kidding."

"You mean you didn't...you don't know who I like?"

"No. Besides, that's your business. I'm not really interested in it."

She fell to her knees. "Oh thank the Great Spirits..."

He turned to her. "Again, why is it such a big deal?"

She looked up at him. "Because...I don't think he loves me back...If he were to find out, it would turn my world upside down."

Her brother grabbed her arm and pulled her up to a standing position. _Are you really so dense that you can't sense Seta's feelings?_ "Let's go home, brat."

She smiled. "Okay."

* * *

Friday came, and, after boring lectures and no movie for their film studies class, Ren went off to his meet, leaving Lien and Tadashi together.

"Walk her home for me, okay?"

"No problem."

Lien sighed. "I'm not some damsel in distress, you know."

"That may be, but I still don't want you walking alone. I don't want anything to happen to you on your way home."

She pouted, her face red. "Fine."

Tadashi chuckled. "You're so cute when you pout." She just tossed her head, allowing her long navy blue hair to flutter down her shoulders.

"See you at home." She grumbled in reply. After he had left, Tadashi leaned over to Lien.

"Let's go study a little. Didn't you say you were still confused about some of the physics formulas?"

She softened. "Yeah..." A smile. "That'd help. Thanks."

"Don't mention it, it's my pleasure. C'mon, let's go."

They went into the library. Since it was Friday, there wasn't anyone in there. They had the whole place to themselves. A half hour later, he was looking over her shoulder as she did a physics problem. She scribbled her way through the propulsion formal, variables and all. Finally, she drew a line, wrote down a number, and circled it. She held her breath as Tadashi picked up the paper and inspected it.

"Gimmie the red marker."

Lien sulked and handed him a thin red marker. It was his designated correction pen – it meant that she had done something wrong. She listened as he wrote on it, trying to measure how much of the work she had done incorrectly.

"Okay, take a look at that," he tutor said as he placed the paper in front of her. Lien glanced at it solemnly. Her eyes widened.

On the paper was a large smiling heart with "Correct! You did it, Lien-hime! Nice job!" written on it in Japanese. She picked up the sheet and studied it in disbelief.

"I got it right?" she whispered.

"Yup. That's what it says, right?"

She was silent before jumping up from her chair with her arms in the air. "I DID IT!" she exclaimed. She danced from the table, doing a dorky victory dance a few feet away. It wasn't long before a puerile song of her own creation accompanied it.

"I'm awesome – you know it! – You're jealous – you know it!"

She danced in a circle. The look in his eyes intensified.

"…You want some – you know it! – You want some – can't have so-!"

Her hand was grabbed and her arm yanked until her lips crashed against his. He put his hand on the small of her back, keeping her in place. She didn't struggle. The situation had caused her to completely freeze.

He finally pulled away and looked deep into her wide yellow eyes. "I'm sorry. I couldn't hold myself back any longer. I've wanted to do that for so long."

During this time, Lien had stood there, too shocked to say anything. Slowly, she brought her fingertips up to touch her lips. But as she did, her eyes flared and she pulled her arm back. With no remorse, she used her left hand to slap him across the face as hard as she possibly could.

There was silence aside from the echo of her attack resounding throughout the large room.

She stared at him, panting lightly, with her hand still out. "How dare you…" she whispered. "HOW FUCKING DARE YOU! Do you have any idea what you've just done?"

He didn't look at her. His head was still turned to the side from the slap.

"That…" Lien's voice quivered as her fingers touched her lips again. "That was my first kiss…" Her fist clenched. "And it was wasted on you!"

She couldn't see his eyes very well, but when "wasted" left her lips, they seemed to be filled with pain.

"Better someone who loves you than someone who doesn't," he whispered.

"Shut up! You don't love me! That's impossible! It's impossible for you to love me when you know nothing about me! You don't know what love is!" she screamed at him. "The love my parents have is the truest and purest love there is! You could never understand something like that! NEVER!"

"I love you," he said.

"Shut up!"

"I swear on every fiber of my being…" He looked her in the eye. "I love you, Tao Lien."

"Shut up!" She squeezed her eyes shut and shoved him away. "I HATE YOU!"

He didn't react.

"Just get away from me! I-I'm going to tell Niisama! He'll kill you!"

"…That's alright. This was my dying wish anyway."

She seemed to choke at this, but then shoved him again. "Stay away from me, you freak! I'll never love you! I hate you!"

"…I'll never hate you…I love you," he whispered.

She shrunk back for a moment, then suddenly reached out to slap his opposite cheek before sprinting out of the room, grabbing her things on her way out. Tadashi gingerly touched the newly reddened cheek.

* * *

Lien ran down the halls, stopping at the door to the matted room where the martial arts meet was being held. She was about to open the door and rush in to tell her brother what Tadashi had done to her, but stopped when she heard his name being called.

_I'll…I'll wait…I'll just tell him when he comes home…_

She turned and started walking toward the main doors. As she neared them, a group of five boys approached her, all grinning.

"Look, guys! It's Lien, that hotshot captain's baby sister!" the leader said.

Lien had no idea who they were, but their uniforms told her they were from a different school – the one Ren's team was fighting against. "If you want a fight, I'm sure my brother will be more than happy to entertain you after the meet is over. Now, if you'll excuse me…"

She went to pass them when the leader grabbed her shoulder and shoved her against the wall. She staggered, trying to grip the tiled surface for support. Her eyes glared at them fiercely.

"Oooh, guys! She's pissed now!" They all laughed. Her eyes intensified. The boy smirked at her. "Okay, if it'll make you feel any better, you can hit me right here." He pointed at his left cheek. "Go ahead, witch, it's on the house."

Lien stared at them, then took a deep breath and swung at him. He grabbed her arm and spun her, pinning her chest-first against the wall. She struggled, but he refused to ease up.

"You really thought I'd let you hit me? Jeez, you never _were_ very smart."

She turned her neck to look back at him, her glare still apparent.

"What's the matter, witch?"

She breathed in, then turned as much as she could and spit in his face. He recoiled, releasing her, and she dashed out the door. As he recovered, he gritted his teeth, his eyes full of rage.

"GET THAT BITCH!" he yelled, and he and his gang ran out in hot pursuit.

Tadashi looked on, her words still echoing in his mind.

"_I'll never love you! I hate you!"_

His head drooped, but as he heard her breathless running, he clenched his fists. Without a second thought, he turned and ran down the hall back toward the mat room. He passed the student council office, which resembled a large movie ticket booth.

"Excuse me! Stop running! Come back here!"

Tadashi stopped, contemplating whether or not he should listen to the voice.

"Come back or I'll give your name to the headmaster!"

He gritted his teeth and went back. "What is it?"

Behind the booth was a girl with short orange hair and stern look in her eyes. "Meihou Tadashi, right? Where are you off to in such a rush?"

"I need to tell the captain of the martial arts team something – it's extremely important!"

"He's engaging in a meet and can't be disturbed, but you're more than welcome to leave a message here and we'll deliver it when he's available."

"You've got to be kidding me. There's no time for that!" He went to run to the room where Ren was.

"If you go, I'll have you suspended for disrupting a school event."

Tadashi turned, his eyes burning with rage. "What the hell is wrong with you? Did someone piss in your porridge or something? If I don't tell him this, Lie-!" He stopped when the girl placed a sheet of paper and a pencil in front of him. After glaring at her, he grabbed the pen and scribbled down a message. She grinned.

"I'll be sure to deliver it to him."

He gave her a fake smile, the bolted in the direction of the main doors, hoping to catch up with Lien.

* * *

Lien, intent on making it home, was running as fast as her legs could carry her. She tentatively looked over her shoulder. They were catching up. Flustered, she looked up at a tree branch. With a hard toss, she threw her school bag up, hoping that it would latch onto it so she could run with less weight and come back for it later. To her dismay, it fell to the ground.

_Fuck._

She could hear the crunching of her belongings being trampled by the gang behind her. Her heart beat faster. She was so afraid. No, she was terrified. She was honestly questioning whether or not she would be able to make it home unscathed. Sooner or later, they were going to catch up.

_I'm still about one kilometer away from home…My only hope may be to just stop and see if I can knock them out or something. I know I can't take them all on at once, but if I can just take them one by one somehow, I might have a chance. After all, Papa was the one who trained me in martial arts._

They got to a clearing and she turned to face them. They stopped. The boys snickered.

"Giving up?" the leader jeered.

She took a fighting stance. "No chance in hell." After a deep breath, she charged at them.

* * *

"Okay, I'm here to take over for you. You can go home now."

"Great. Thanks, Ai-Li."

The bespectacled girl made her way into the student council booth. It was almost four, and therefore time for her shift at the advisory and hall patrol station. As she sat down, she noticed a folded piece of paper with bold Japanese kanji on it. She picked it up and examined it, not opening it.

"What's this note?" she asked the recently relieved member.

The girl turned back from the door. "Oh, that? Meihou Tadashi left it for the captain of the martial arts team."

"The captain…?"

"Yeah. I told him I couldn't let him disturb the meet he's in right now. I guess I pissed him off, because he went and wrote it in Japanese. You're the president of the Japanese club, right? Do you know what it says?"

Ai-Li gingerly turned back to the note. Then she noticed the kanji that was underlined multiple times. Her eyes widened.

"D-Danger?"

"Hm, what?"

Ai-Li hesitated for a moment, obviously unsure about opening someone else's mail, but then closed her eyes and unfolded it. Her eyes scanned the sheet, translating it in her mind with no trouble at all. When she was done, she stood up.

"I'm going to need you to stay here for a few more minutes while I run this over to the captain."

"Why?"

"D…Don't question my decision…!" she said, trying to be assertive. The girl stared at her.

"O…kay…"

Ai-Li rushed out the door, heading toward the matted room.

_I have to give this to him…Something bad could be happening…_

She tripped and fell.

"Ow…" As she sat up, she clenched her small fists with bits of her skirt and stared at the floor. "Why am I so eager to help an underclassman?" she whispered to herself. "I…I'm not." She stood up. "I'm doing it because it's the right thing to do." She began running again.

As she arrived, she grabbed the handle of the door and flung it open. She was frozen as a student hit the mat before her, clearing her view of Ren, the one who had knocked him down. He smirked at her and turned away.

"Re—I mean…Captain!"

He turned back around as she approached him, offering the letter in her hands. She knew he could read the words on the front from the reaction of almost grabbing the note from her. As he read it, she looked at the increasing worry mixed with utter fury that was filling his eyes. She saw his fists clenching the paper so tightly that they seemed ready to rip it in half. Not knowing what else to do, she glanced sideways at the ground.

The coach came over and Ren shoved the piece of paper against his chest. He took the note from the captain's vise grip and unraveled it. By the time he asked Ai-Li to read it to him, Ren was gone.

* * *

Lien hit the ground. She couldn't get up. Her body ached all over.

Her pursuers had been in control since the very beginning. She never had a prayer against them. They were all unneeded substitutes for the meet, and there was no way she could have handled five of them at once. They had taken turns beating her up as they mocked her. When she had tried to run, they grabbed her long hair and yanked her back. She could taste blood in her mouth and see it all over her body. Even after all this, she didn't know why she had been targeted in the first place.

The head boy kicked her in order to turn her body over, making her lay on her back.

"Let's have some fun."

Her eyes widened as he grabbed her hair and forcefully pulled her to her knees. She could only whimper with tears in her eyes as he reached for the button of her blazer.

Suddenly, he was knocked back, causing Lien's body to fall to the ground with a thud. The boy looked up, holding his head.

"Who the hell did that?"

"Yo."

Lien shifted her eyes to look up and see Tadashi standing over her. He looked down at her, smiling.

"Sorry I'm late, Princess," he said. "My 'trusty steed' was nowhere to be found. Guess it's not so trusty after all, ne?"

She stared up at him, then smiled weakly. He picked her up and set her against a tree.

"Just wait here. I'll be done soon." He stood and faced her attackers. "You've got a lot of nerve beating up a girl; especially Lien."

"Listen, you Jap, this is none of your business. Just beat it," the leader said.

"You can call me whatever names you want. It only shows what a coward you are." He reached behind him and produced a metal harisen. "I don't allow anyone to lay a finger on Lien, and now you're about to find out what happens when you do."

He charged at him. When his target tried to turn away, he swung and hit him in the ribs, sending him to the ground. He looked up to see that the other gang members had surrounded him.

"Four of you against little old me? Sounds like fun," he chortled.

The boy behind him charged, but Tadashi quickly turned and kicked him away. Another attacked, and he punched him in the stomach, then used the harisen to slap him across the face and onto the ground. The final two tried a double-team attack, but he hit one and then the other, allowing them to join their friends. He panted, then walked over to where Lien was.

"Now that that's taken care of…" He stopped as Lien's eyes widened. He looked back in time to see the group's boss land a punch square in the jaw. Tadashi went to get up, but his opponent brought a foot down on his core. He froze, unable to even let out a cry of pain. The boy sneered and looked back at his accomplices.

"Pick him up and hold him for me," he commanded.

They obeyed and he began giving the fallen knight hook after hook, wasting no time in drawing blood. Lien watched in horror. He was getting the beating of his life, and it was all because he tried to protect her.

He finally grabbed the unconscious Tadashi by the collar and tossed him so that he landed near Lien.

"Well, now that that's taken care of," the brute said in a mocking tone.

_Please just leave us alone…You've done enough_, Lien thought. _Please just go…_

He grinned at her. "Hold the Jap's head up," he said to his men minions. "I want him to see this. I don't care if he's a fucking vegetable right now. He'll wake up at some point, and when he does, I want this to be the first thing he sees."

Slowly, they did, but one seemed unsure. "Suōshǐ…what are you gonna do?"

His grin grew wider as he loosened the tie of his uniform. "I'm just going to teach her the proper place for a woman in this society. I'm gonna show her the only thing a freak like her is good for."

The minion's eyes widened. "Wait, boss! Do we really need to take things this far? I mean, yeah, the other guy smacked us around a little but she doesn't deserve THIS, does she?"

Suōshǐ frowned at him. "You're QUESTIONING me?" He sighed. "Well, SOMEONE here isn't going to get a turn with her. Too bad it's the virgin." The other boys snickered.

The boy looked at them frantically. "N-No! That wasn't what I meant!"

Suōshǐ smirked. "This isn't just to punish her, but it's for that shithead shaman brother of hers and what he did to me." His eyes seemed crazed. "I just can't wait to see the look on that fucking bastard's face when he finds out that his dear baby sister isn't so pure and virginal anymore. The look on the face of that asshole father of theirs would be even better. Thinking about it makes all those weeks in that itchy cast worth it."

Lien's eyes were quivering with fear. _Move…Move…MOVE! COME ON JUST GET OUT OF HERE!_ Her body was unable to obey her.

Suōshǐ grabbed her ankle and dragged her a few meters from the tree. "You've got nice legs. No wonder you were able to run for so long."

He laughed and straddled her hips. She shifted her eyes to look at the boy who had objected, but he averted his gaze. She stared up into the darkening sky.

_I wanted to give this to Him…_

Suōshǐ ripped her blazer open, and then her blouse, causing buttons to fly in every direction. He touched her flesh through the white satin covering her chest. He whistled. "Pretty nice rack you got here, Lien. Even you can have some redeeming qualities," he said with faux awe. "I'll make good use of them, don't worry. You're going to need them once I'm done with you." His hands began to roam.

She closed her eyes and inhaled as she heard thunder. _Lei-Gong…if you're up there, please, just kill me now. I can't live through this shame._

He was lifting her skirt, snickering. "Now the fun begins." She squeezed her eyes shut as tightly as she could.

Nothing ever came except for a loud thud. She heard his cry of pain as he hit a tree and slumped to the ground. Rain sprinkled tiny drops on her face as she tried to look up at a shadow that was now standing over her.

_Papa? No…Not Papa…Too short…_

Suōshǐ looked up. "NOW WHO IS—!" He froze as he looked up and saw the shadow. His group froze as well, dropping Tadashi.

Lien saw a pair of glowing yellow eyes and smiled weakly.

"Niisama…"


	72. Kirikirimai

I decided to split this chapter in two so it's only about 12 pages. But hey, I bet you guys would get really irritated if I posted humongous chapters with every update, right?

**Notes: Lien's voice is gone because ****Suōshǐ**** strangled her before he decided he wanted to use her for something else. **

** A "gi" is what you would call a martial arts uniform. I don't like to keep saying "martial arts", since I never use any other term, but I can't find a credible work to use. "Karate" is Japanese, "Tae kwon do" is Korean...bah humbug!**

**I tried to keep the fatherly "do as I say" phrases to a minimum. I don't like hearing those words, even though they're not directed at me. -shot- But honestly, I find it weird to have Ren saying things like that. **

** This chapter we meet Lien's Wei guardian, Sheng. Her name is part of the word "student" or "novice".**

**There's a part at the end that may boggle your mind a bit. It's referencing the fact that Rong was disowned by the Wei family.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Two: Kirikirimai (Rushing Round and Round)**

* * *

Suōshǐ stood up, holding his side. He was obviously trying not to look afraid. "Look who showed up, guys," he said. His minions were frozen in fear.

Ren slowly stood from the kneeling position he had taken after his attack.

"Aren't you supposed to be at the meet?"

He said nothing as he turned his head to glare at him. Suōshǐ cringed as Ren's cold and ruthless eyes came into view. He only glanced at him as if he found him worthless or unimportant, then he turned away again.

His gaze trailed to Lien, who was looking up at him in shock. But all he saw were the numerous bruises and trails of blood all over her body, her exposed bra, and the tears in her eyes.

She tilted her chin down and remembered how vulnerable she was. When she tried to cover herself, her arms could only rise an inch or two off the ground. Ren slowly knelt down beside her, intending to button her blouse, but stopped as he found a few missing, then turned his head a little and sighed. He buttoned up what he could in a motherly fashion, then picked her up and leaned her against a tree in a sitting position. After looking her over, he took the handkerchief from her blazer's breast pocket and gently wiped the blood from her face, not saying a word.

"Niisama..." she whispered. He wiped her eyes again and again, finally putting his hand on her head.

"It'll be over soon," he whispered back to her, then kissed her forehead.

She gave a weak smile, then looked to her right where Tadashi lay face-down on the ground in a bloody mess. Remorse flooded her eyes. "Tadashi..." Her voice was still barely audible due to the exhaustion and pain she was feeling. "Tadashi...he..."

Ren stood and leaned his classmate against a tree near Lien's. When he was done, he looked at the unconscious face before him. "I was wrong about you, Meihou. Thanks for buying me some time."

Finally, he slowly stood and turned his head to the side.

"I've given you a few moments to yourselves so you could pray to whatever deity you follow and ask it to give you a swift and painless death. Because unfortunately..." He raised his left hand slightly and snapped his fingers. "...I'm not that merciful."

He could see Suōshǐ sweating, but the bully still tried to look confident. "There's still five of us and only one of you. Lien and her little boyfriend were outnumbered and they lost. Why do you think you'll be any different?"

"Because,"

"Because?"

Ren was suddenly in front of him. He punched him and sent him flying across the clearing.

"Neither of them received an award for most knockouts by a first year – ever."

He turned to the rest of the group, who cringed.

"How long did you beat her?" he asked stoically. "Hm? How long? One minute? Five minutes?" He began walking toward them. "Ten minutes? Twenty? Thirty?"

He vanished. The boys looked around frantically, trying to see him so they would know where he was and where they could hide.

Ren reappeared among them. "It doesn't matter...Even a fraction of a second is too long." He did a roundhouse kick and scattered them. He stood silently for a moment, then walked over to one of them and picked him up by the collar. The boy whimpered and trembled, obviously scared out of his mind.

"Wimps like you make me sick." He punched him. "You knew what Suōshǐ was going to do was wrong, but when he made fun of you, you backed down when you could have saved her, thus saved yourselves from the beating I'm going to give you."

"P-Please...have mercy on me...I don't want to die!"

Ren glared at him. "DO YOU THINK LIEN WANTED TO HAVE HER BLOOD SPILLED ON THE GROUND? DO YOU THINK SHE WANTED TO BE RAPED? DO YOU?"

The boy's whimpers and shaking worsened as shameless tears fell from his eyes. "I'm sorry! I-I should have stopped them! Please don't kill me! I...I didn't touch her! I REALLY DIDN'T!"

Ren smirked and looked back at Lien. "Is he telling the truth, Mei-Mei?"

Lien looked up and studied her brother's victim. She nodded after a few moments. Ren turned back to the boy, almost disappointed. He gripped him tighter.

"What's your name, vermin?"

"J-Jin..."

"Well, Jin, it looks like, thanks to my sister, you've been saved. I think you should thank her." Silence. Jin didn't move. "DO IT."

Scared, Jin looked at the girl. "T-Thank you Lien…"

Ren threw him harshly to the ground. "Good. Now get out of here. I'm not interested in spineless scum like you anymore." His eyes narrowed. "But know this: if you ever are part of a group that harasses my sister again, I'll kill you."

Jin stared at him, then got up and scampered away, screaming.

"That traitor…" Suōshǐ growled. He stood and drew a knife. "At least I've got this. No matter how good you are at martial arts, I've got the upper hand now."

Ren turned to him apathetically. "Go grab another if you want. It still won't make any difference."

Soushi gritted his teeth as Ren removed the jacket of his gi and placed it on Lien's shoulders.

"The rain's getting heavier. I don't want you to get sick." She stared at him with red cheeks. He placed the back of his hand on one of them. "You're already burning up. Your cheeks are proof; they're all red and hot."

"I feel…fine…" she whispered.

"HEY!"

The twins looked up as Suōshǐ growled, the knife still clenched in his right hand.

"Don't ignore me!" he yelled.

Ren stood and walked away from Lien in an attempt to divert the maniac's attention from her. "Well then, come at me if you're so eager."

Suōshǐ's eyes flared as he charged at the Tao heir. "You bastard! I'll make you taste your own blood!"

Ren just stood there, getting ready to sidestep him, but as he approached, Suōshǐ flung his left arm out and slashed Ren's shirt, then got behind him and slashed his back. Ren staggered.

Lien's eyes widened. "Niisama!" she cried in a voice that was barely a loud, raspy whisper.

"How do you like THAT?"Suōshǐ laughed, then looked at Ren's back more closely. His laughter faded until he was just staring. He pointed at him. "What the fuck is on your back?"

Ren stood and ripped the shirt from his body. "This? This is my family crest, of course. A remnant of my childhood, a reminder of the hatred you spurred in me all those years ago."

"Y-Your school will expel you when they find out about this! They won't allow a tattoo like that! I'll make sure they know about it!"

He chuckled and turned around. The bully's eyes focused on the mark on his chest. "W-What the hell is that?"

Ren touched the large scar that ran between his pecs. "A scar I gave myself in exchange for the trouble I caused my family as a result of your endless harassment. It's a symbol of the love I have for my sister." Suōshǐ was just staring at him. "Are you wondering why I used the word 'love'? I used it because that's what my true feelings are. I don't know how to feel love for someone in the sense that I want to be with them forever. The only love I know is the love I feel toward my family. That's the only emotion of that sort that I need."

He vanished and appeared behind the brute. Suōshǐ went to turn and face him, but Ren pulled the boy's wrist and kneed him in the stomach, then landed a crescent kick to his head. He walked over to the body and turned the head with his foot.

"You couldn't resist your desire for Lien, could you?" he whispered. "If I wasn't her brother, I'd probably feel sorry for you." He swung his leg back and kicked the body a few feet.

Suōshǐ's eyes were wide in horror. He was terrified. He knew that Ren was just playing with him, that he could kill him any time he wanted to. He was yanked up, his face brought close to Ren's.

"What's your favorite part of her? Hm?" Ren asked in a haunting voice. "Is it her hair? Her eyes? Her hips? Her legs?" He sneered. "Each of those things make her the beautiful creature she is. Personally, I find her tears to be the most intoxicating."

Suōshǐ shuddered. "You…You're a creep! S-Saying those t-things about your s-sister!"

"In your eyes, maybe I am. But when your twin is something so stunning that it took the qualities of both parents to create, it's hard not to want to boast about and protect her." He pulled him close. "In fact, her purity is so important to me that _I_ would take her before I would allow a filthy human like you to do the same."

His victim's eyes were wide as he stared up at him. "Y-You really ARE a freak! That-that's incest!"

Tadashi lifted his head slightly. _Dammit…I didn't want it to get to this point. I'm too late…He's too attached_. He let it fall again. _Damn it all…_

Ren looked up as he heard a whizzing sound. He reached out and grabbed Houraiken's hilt and smirked. "Finally." He looked at the sniveling boy before him. "Now we can begin your punishment."

"W-W-What are you g-gonna do t-to m-me?"

Ren smiled kindly and tossed him to the ground. A shiver went down Suōshǐ's spine as the happy smile stayed on his face.

"I'm going to kill you."

Suōshǐ's face went completely white. "K-K-K-K-K-K-K-KILL ME?"

Ren nodded as if he were affirming something to a dear friend. "Of course. You've done enough damage to this world – especially to my family."

"H-How..?"

The smiled disappeared. Ren's eyes burned with rage as he placed his foot on his prey's throat.

"How? YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW?" he yelled. "My sister and I lived in fear for our lives because of your campaign to turn all of our classmates against us. We had no friends and suffered with only the other to comfort us. I went home bruised and bloody so many times that I lost count. My mother cried for me, never understanding how people could be so cruel at such a young age. Worst of all, you made Lien bleed…and that's something you're about to pay for."

He flicked his wrist and Houraiken extended itself. Suōshǐ's eyes were getting wider by the second.

"This is your own fault," Ren continued. "If my blood had hit the ground on that fateful day instead of hers, I'd still be that useless wimpy coward that I was. But because you made me watch as you beat her until her blood was drawn, I became this…" He looked at his right hand and clenched it into a fist. "I can never return to being the person I once was. There are demons inside me that will never go away. They try to control me like they did that day. Sometimes I miss that part of me…the boy that was sensitive and loving and kissed his mother before he went to school each morning…but it doesn't matter. I'll never be him again."

"N-N-None of that is my fault! It's not my fault that you became a psycho! W-What have I done?"

The Tao's eyes flared again. He grabbed the brute by the hair and pulled him up so that he was on his knees. "You want to know what you and your family did? How all of you hurt the people I love? Fine, I'll tell you." His voice went low and his eyes showed more rage than they had all night.

"Back then, your mother commented that my parents were a "knocked up couple" because my mother was so young; that she was irresponsible for having children. After my mother's outburst, I thought that you all would keep your mouths shut, but no. As my father spoke with the teacher, his back turned, your parents walked past my mother, eager to have the last word."

* * *

"_Mrs. Tao, I think it would be in your best interest to abort the child you're carrying now. From what I can see, you and your husband failed to teach your children right from wrong. With your son exhibiting such violence, I can only assume that's the way you brought them up. What a horrible environment."_

_Pin-Mei just stared at her with wide eyes._

"_If you love that unborn child, you'll save it the cruel life it has ahead of it."_

"_I-I-I'm not sure I-"_

"_Do you not understand what I'm saying? You're an unfit mother and shouldn't have been allowed to have children in the first place. I can only hope that you're competent enough to teach that daughter of yours to keep her own legs together so she doesn't make the same mistakes you have."_

_Pin-Mei's eyes were wide and dull, almost corpse-like. Her son looked up at her and squeezed her hand to try to rouse her, but she didn't respond. She placed her left hand on her womb as the woman smiled._

"_I'll be praying that whatever demon you worship helps you make the right decision." She and her husband left the room, __Suōshǐ__ in tow. Ren glared at them._

_Pin-Mei stared at where they had been. Slowly, walked back over to the couch that she and her husband had occupied during the meeting and sat down. Ren cautiously joined her, still holding her hand as he took a seat beside her. Soon, her body was quivering. He looked up and saw fat tears falling from her eyes. Not knowing what else to do, he hugged her above her midsection and gave her a peck._

"_I love you, Mu Qin."_

_She smiled weakly and clutched him, stroking his hair. "I love you too, sweetheart…very much."_

"_You…You're the best mom in the world," he pushed the words out, not knowing what else to say._

_She messed up his bangs as she always liked to do. She kissed his cheek, then his forehead. "Thank you, Ren. That means a lot to me…It really does." She held him tighter and began sobbing as her husband turned around._

"_...I...I just wanted to be a good mother..."_

* * *

Ren gritted his teeth. "My mother cried for days because of you. She stayed in my parents room and just cried. She never told my father that your mother had said anything else to her, so he thought it was only that one comment about being a "knocked up couple" that had made her so upset. The stress her body suffered due to her anguish was enough to cause complications with her pregnancy. I almost didn't have a little brother because of your ignorant family. I had never seen my mother cry so hard and so much in my entire life. In fact, I still haven't."

His fist was shaking. Unable to control himself any longer, he punched Suōshǐ and let him fall to the ground. He placed his foot on the back of his head and tapped it a few times, forcing the boy's face into the soggy soil.

"My mother is the best mother any child could ever ask for. She loves her children unconditionally. Even after I kill you, she'll still give me as much love as she gave me this morning. She and my father raised their children brilliantly – my siblings are proof of that." His eyes narrowed. "You're never going to hurt my family again."

He grabbed the back of Suōshǐ's shirt and tossed him onto his back. The bully coughed and wiped the mud from his mouth, then looked up as he saw something glisten.

Ren's left arm rose as Houraiken reflected the lightning that flashed above them.

"Die."

Suōshǐ screamed and shut his eyes as the hand fell.

_Idon'twannadieIdon'twannadieIdon'twannadieIdon'twannadie__**IDON'TWANNADIE!**_

But when he realized he still had a head, he cautiously opened one eye, thinking that maybe Ren had paused and was waiting for his eyes to open so he could see the object of his destruction. When he saw that Ren still wasn't moving, he opened the other. His eyes widened.

Ren was frozen in mid-motion, his eyes still insane with rage, as if he had every intention of slaying the boor that was at his mercy. Suōshǐ looked at the sword and the hand that held it...then at the hand that was grasping the young Tao's wrist.

"Let go, Father,"

"No, Ren. That's enough."

His son clenched the sword tighter. "You have no idea what this bastard has done...what he tried to do..." he said in a low voice. He jerked his head to the right. "Look over there – what do you see?"

Ren glanced to his right and saw Lien leaning against the tree – bruised, battered, and bloody. As he looked closer, he could see buttons missing from her blouse. She tried to smile at him, still in too much pain to speak in a voice loud enough for him to hear. He turned back to his son.

"He tried to rape her," he thought aloud.

The younger Ren grit his teeth and clenched his fist even tighter around the hilt. The veins in his arms were slightly more visible.

"That's right," he said. "This piece of shit tried to violate her, to break her down. He obviously doesn't give a fuck about her life, so I'm not giving one about his."

His father was silent for a moment.

"I know what you're feeling, but you can't just kill someone. If he had gone through with it, then there would be more reason behind it, but killing him is going too far."

The teen shook with anger. "How can you be so calm about this? LIEN WAS ALMOST RAPED! What if she had gotten pregnant? No matter what the reason she would have been kicked out of school!"

"But she wasn't, and she didn't. 'What if' doesn't do us any good here."

As they argued back and forth, Suōshǐ looked around to see his gang recovering and standing up. He nodded at them, and they surrounded the two Rens. The Tao head glanced at them, trying to come up with a plan.

_If I let go of Ren to ward off these flunkies, there's a chance he could kill __Suōshǐ__ while I'm distracted...but if I just sit here, I'll be subject to injury..._

Before he could decide, a figure flew out from the bushes and kicked one of the boys in the head. She landed, then flipped around, punching and heli-kicking her way around the circle of delinquents until they all had resumed their rightful places on the ground.

The warrior finally stood, her short, spiked red hair covering her left eye.

"So you _were_ following me, Wei Sheng," her lord said stoically. Sheng rushed over to him and assumed a kowtow position in front of him.

"Please forgive me, Lord Ren," she said. "When I saw Milord running after Houraiken without any reinforcements, I thought that I should accompany you in the event that you needed assistance."

"Well, you ended up being useful, so your actions are justified."

"Thank you, Milord."

The would-be killer struggled, trying to free himself from his father's grasp. Ren turned his attention back to the subject at hand.

"Drop Houraiken, Ren," he said in a calm voice. "I don't want to have to use force in order to stop you."

"Hypocrite…"

"What?"

"Hypocrite!" the young Tao yelled. "When mother was in Lien's place, you killed everyone there – you only spared one person because Yoh arrived before you could kill him! You have NO RIGHT to tell me to spare this philistine's life!"

"That doesn't make what I did right. Do as I say."

"If you loved Lien, you would do the same!"

"Drop the weapon."

"You don-!"

He collapsed as his father struck him on the side of the neck. Sighing, Ren bent down and picked up the sword. He glared at Suōshǐ, now cowering on the ground and sniveling like a baby.

"You may think I stopped him because I felt that you were a victim…You're wrong." He leaned down to whisper in his ear.

"If you HAD raped her, I would have stepped in and stopped him only so I could have the pleasure of killing you with my own hands."

Suōshǐ shook even more as Ren stood and went over to Lien. Worry filled his eyes as her wounds became more visible. He knelt down in front of her and brushed her bangs out of her face. With her eyes and hair, it was like looking at himself.

"Sorry I didn't win…Papa," she whispered. "Five on one…it was just too much for me to handle…" She smiled. "I got a couple of them, though…But then they ganged up on me and…and…"

"It's alright, you don't need to apologize," he replied softly. "There's not really anything you could have done to even the odds by yourself." He uncharacteristically gave her a weak smile in an attempt to soothe her, then gathered her in his arms and picked her up.

Sheng ran over to them and fell to the ground in another kowtow, this time for Lien. "I'm sorry I wasn't here to protect you, Mistress! I've failed at my one mission in life! Please forgive me!"

"It's okay, Sheng, really," Lien whispered. "I didn't think something like this was going to happen." She heard a groan and turned her head to see Tadashi using the tree he had been leaning against to hoist himself up. Her eyes softened. "Tadashi…"

He looked up at her. "Hey, Princess," he said with a weak smile. He nodded at Ren. "Nice to see you again, sir."

Ren returned the gesture. "Oh no, the pleasure's all mine," he said sarcastically.

The boy grinned, then looked down at himself. "Well, I'd better get home before all these cuts get infected," he said with a worried chuckle. "See you at school tomorrow, Lien." He turned and started hobbling off.

"Hold it."

"Eh?" Tadashi turned around, confused. Ren's face was stern.

"You're coming home with us."

He blinked at him. "Me? Why?"

"Because the nurses in our clinic will be able to treat your wounds better than you can by yourself." He turned. Tadashi didn't move. "Come on. Dinner should be ready soon, and Pin-Mei will be wondering where I went."

"Y-Yes sir!" He followed him.

Lien looked up at her father. "Papa, you didn't tell Mama where you were going?"

He shook his head. "There wasn't any time. I was just practicing my forms when Houraiken flew by me. I knew it couldn't be anything good, so I went after it, hoping I could find out what was going on. If I had stopped to tell your mother where I was going, I would have lost sight of it."

"I see."

Ren looked back to see that the delinquents had vanished. His son was now sitting up on his knees and staring at the ground. He walked past him as he began to start the trek home.

"Father…"

"What."

"…Thank you for stopping me…I...almost did something inhuman."

Silence.

"What you just experienced was the burning impulse of revenge. No matter how against the idea you would usually be, your emotions take over, and all you can think about is making the people who hurt the one you love suffer through as much as pain as possible."

More silence.

"Niisama…thank you."

Her brother looked up at her. "I'm just glad you're okay."

She blushed. "Still…thank you."

Behind them, Tadashi scowled.

* * *

"Great Spirits…what happened to you?" Pin-Mei cried as she watched her family walk in. She ran up to her husband and cradled the face of the girl in his arms, easily able to see her wounds. "Lien…What on Earth…?" She touched her forehead to her daughter's and started sobbing. "Why is it always MY children? …Why…?"

"I'm okay, Mama, I really am," Lien said, her voice somewhat restored. "Niisama and Tadashi saved me."

"Tada…shi?" She looked around and spied the boy behind her son and went over to him. She bowed. "Thank you for helping Lien."

He blushed and waved his hand in front of him in an embarrassed fashion. "No thanks necessary, really, Mrs. Tao." He winced slightly and grabbed his arm.

"You're hurt," Pin-Mei observed dumbly. She touched his arm, but her son grabbed it.

"Heal Lien first. She's the most injured…plus, she's your daughter."

Pin-Mei stopped. "Oh, yes, yes, of course!" She switched patients, placing her hands on Lien's face like she had done moments earlier.

Lien's cuts seemed to dissolve like drops of water on a hot stove, quickly healing and vanishing without leaving a trace. Within a few minutes, the process was complete. Tadashi flinched as she placed a hand on his arm and the other on his chest. He watched in awe as his wounds closed and the pain he had been feeling only moments before disappeared. Once she was done, Pin-Mei surveyed her handiwork.

"Good as new!" she said cheerfully.

Sheng came running up behind her holding a small armchair over her head. She set it down and straightened it.

"Milady, a chair."

"Oh! Thank you, Sheng!" She sat down.

Tadashi was still looking himself over. "That's amazing! How did you do that?"

Pin-Mei blushed. "I had to learn the spell from a book my mother left me. It wasn't easy, but I was able to learn it in about two weeks. But it only taught me the most basic healing techniques. After that, it's up to me to hone my techniques and make them more effective, as well as highten my ability to do it for an extended period of time."

"It's because of the whole shaman thing, right? That's pretty awesome. Is there anything else you can do?"

"Well, I-"

"My wife doesn't live to entertain you," Ren said in an annoyed tone. Tadashi shrank away from him.

"Do you need anything else, Milady?" Sheng said.

"No, I'm fine, but thank you."

Tadashi studied the girl. She stood at about 5'9" with an athletic build and a red halter top.

"Who's this?" he asked Lien, who was now standing without assistance.

"Oh, this is..."

"I'm Wei Sheng," the warrior said. "I come from the Wei family, which currently resides in Xu-Tao Castle in the Hunan province. I was born for the sole purpose of protecting and serving Lady Lien. The seal on my back is proof of that." She turned for a moment, allowing Tadashi to glance at it briefly before she went full circle. "I came into her service about ten years ago when mysterious attempts on the li-"

"That's enough, Sheng," Ren cut in. He didn't want the guard to divulge the information about how his wife and daughter were almost killed. The assassination attempts mysteriously stopped after he had threatened Huan once more, though she had tearfully denied any involvement in them. An attempt hadn't been made in about nine years, but he never let his guard down.

Sheng bowed her head. "My deepest apologies, My Liege."

Tadashi blinked. "Mrs. Tao, did you have a bodyguard too?"

Pin-Mei smiled and nodded. "Yes, I-"

"Lady Pin-Mei's former guardian died in battle more than twenty years ago while escorting her to Tao Castle," Sheng said. "Unfortunately, her name is known to no one. That is to be expected, seeing as we are to be minor players in the lives of our mistresses. Though she was by then in Master Ren's care, another warrior, my honorable aunt, was assigned to her."

Pin-Mei looked at her with large, pained eyes. _How could Rong's own brother tell such lies...?_

Tadashi looked at them, confused. "That's...cool, I guess..." He looked at his watch, brushing some dirt off of the face so he could read it properly, then turned to leave. "It's getting late. I need to get home and start dinner." He laughed nervously. "Plus, I have to go look for my bookbag."

"Oh...Okay..." Lien said as she watched him head for the door.

"Meihou."

The boy froze and turned slowly, looking over his shoulder. "Yes, Sir?"

Ren closed his eyes and sighed, not used to the words he was about to say, then looked his daughter's savior in the eye. "...Thank you for coming to Lien's aid. If you hadn't...she would have suffered more than she did." He paused. "You're welcome here anytime you wish."

His son's eyes widened and gave him a look that seemed to question his sanity. Tadashi stared at the Tao head, then smiled.

"Thank you. I appreciate your offer, but I'll try not to abuse it."

He looked in front of him to see Lien. She stood, seemingly emotionless, then suddenly lunged and hugged him.

"Thank you," she whispered. "I...I'm sorry I slapped you. I won't do it again."

His eyes were wide at the sudden action, but they softened as he returned the embrace. He savored it, knowing that it may be a long time before he would receive another one – if he _ever_ did.

"You're welcome...Lien."

He closed his eyes. _Maybe this is what happiness is like..._


	73. Innocent Sorrow

Guess what today (Jan 1st) is. No, go on, guess :D It's Ren's 22nd birthday! Happy birthday, Ren!...even though you're off taming the Spirit of Thunder.

It's time for another installment of "This Wasn't In My Original Plans"! I'm one of those people who likes to see how stories evolve from the first idea, so that's probably why I do this. Anyway, when I first thought this arc up, Tadashi wasn't Tadashi-like at all. In fact, his name was Keima, which means "knight" in Japanese (Tadashi means "righteous" by the way, even though it's usually spelled "Tadashii"). He never spoke, and actually won the fight against Suoshi and his gang. Ren and Lien weren't twins. In fact, Ren was about two to three years older than Lien, whose name was originally Ren-Xiang. Yi was still around to see baby Níu-Năi and poke at him, and Sheng and Huan didn't exist. Also, Ren ignored his kids a lot more, especially Lien. My, how things have changed.

**Notes: If you wonder why I italicize "kun", it's because whenever the girls say it, it gets on Tadashi's nerves. As you remember, he doesn't like being called that by people he doesn't know, especially since they're in China.**

**I DO have Tadashi randomly say some Japanese things in this chapter, only because of the state of mind he's in at the time. He usually speaks Chinese, seeing as he knows he's a "guest" so to speak, and believes he's being polite by using the native tongue.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Three: Innocent Sorrow**

* * *

"'Welcome anytime you want'? What the hell? It's two days later, and I STILL don't understand you!"

"You don't need to understand it, only accept it. I'm the head of this family, so any person I wish to welcome here is my decision and should be followed and obeyed without question."

"Just because he got the crap beaten out of him?"

"You yourself said it was Tadashi's note that let you know Lien was in danger. Without that, she would have lost her pride, her purity, her smile, maybe even her life if they had gotten that far. Whether you accept it or not, we owe Tadashi a great deal for involving himself in something that didn't concern him whatsoever. The least we can do is offer him a place where he can be around other people and get away from the silence of his house."

"Why are you so fond of him all of a sudden?"

"Ren, stop making me repeat myself. You're not going to win this argument, so do yourself a favor and save your breath."

His son clenched his fists as they walked down the hall. The last two days had been heated ones. The father and son who used to get along so well were now constantly arguing. Their views on Tadashi inversed each other, but Ren wouldn't be satisfied until he had made his father see things his way.

They walked in silence for a few minutes. As they passed Lien's bathroom, which was positioned next to her room, the elder Ren stopped as he heard a snipping sound. He did a small sidestep and brought his ear near the door. After a few moments, he lightly rapped the back of his fist against it. He heard her startled gasp – she was up to no good.

"Lien, what are you doing in there?" he asked casually.

His son looked skeptical. "What's going on?"

"We'll find out soon." He listened. "Lien?"

"I-I um…uh…I'm shaving my legs, so don't come in, please."

Another snip

"It must be taking you a long time since you seem to be cutting each hair with a pair of scissors."

Silence.

"Lien, I'm coming in." He turned the doorknob.

"N-No! Don't!"

But Ren had already opened the door. He stared at her. "What did you…"

Lien was standing in front of a mirror with scissors in her hand. Her long navy blue hair now covered the ground. She looked at her scissors, then at the floor. Her hand ran through the short locks of hair that remained.

"Now it can't be used to yank me back anymore…" she said quietly. The Rens said nothing. She smiled weakly as she felt some of the hair on the back of her head stick up. "I forgot this would happen…I must look dumb now, right?"

She laughed, but as it subsided, her shoulders shook. Dropping the scissors, she staggered and fell to her knees as she put her face in her hands and started crying.

Ren watched her wail for a moment, then dropped down next to her and quickly wrapped his arms around his daughter and pulled her close to him. She cried into his chest.

"P-Papa...W-Why did it have to b-be me...?"

He closed his eyes as he thought. The answer was so clear, but at the same time, it wasn't. He knew why she was berated and made fun of, but he didn't know why anyone who really knew who she was would want to do such things to her.

"Because there are people who don't understand the talents you have," he replied. "They're trying to poison your mind with their ideas, but don't let them – they aren't true."

"Eh-Is that really the only th-thing I'm g-good f-for?"

He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her away from him so that he could look into her eyes. Even more so than a few nights before did he feel as though he was talking to the younger version of himself.

"No. Never let anyone tell you otherwise," he said. "They say that because they don't know anything about you. If they knew even one thing about you, then they'd understand what a kind, smart, creative, and loving person you are."

She stared at him, then more tears came and she fell against his chest again. He had never said anything like that before.

Ren wrapped his arms around her again and stroked her hair. The voice he used was still low and monotone, but now had a certain softness to it. "No matter what you do to yourself, you'll always be beautiful to me. You're my only daughter – one of the most precious things in the world to me. Never forget that."

The brother looked on from the doorway, one eye void and emotionless, another seemingly full of longing.

_**Why can't I be held like that?**_

_You don't need to be. You're too strong for that._

_**Why won't he tell me I'm precious to him?**_

_You have no need for such soft words._

_**Why...Why can't I be free? Why won't you let me out?**_

_...I have no use for a weakling like you._

"Papa...do you feel that way about Niisama, too?"

Ren jolted back to reality at the sound of his sister's voice. He looked down at his father, who looked back at him before finally speaking.

"I do. The both of you are my pride and joy."

* * *

"_WHAT_ HAPPENED TO LIEN?"

"She's fine now, so calm down, Seta."

"B-B-But I...I want..."

"Just say it. You want to be the one who takes her virginity."

"N-NO! That's such an awkward thing to talk about – especially with you!"

"Heh..."

Seta was silent for a moment.

"So...um...how is she?"

"She cut off most of her hair. It's about as short as mine now."

"She WHAT?"

"Calm down...Reactions like that are common in people who have been assaulted. We're just trying to help her relax and get back into the swing of things."

"I see..."

Silence.

"Can I..."

"Hello?"

Seta froze. "H-Hey, Lien! H-How is everything?"

He could almost hear her smile. "Hi. I'm...doing okay."

"Really? I..." He swallowed. "...I was worried about you."

"Aww! You're always so sweet, Seta." She giggled.

He blushed. "Well...I...I just like making sure you're okay."

"Aww again. Haha!"

He laughed nervously. "You know...Lien...I..."

"Hm?"

He would have been fine had she not interrupted. "I-I-I..."

"T-T-T-T-Today, Seta."

"Lien, for the longest time, I-I...I've always...I just really..."

"Lien! Get off the phone – it's time for dinner!" Pin-Mei called from the dining room.

"Oh, sorry, Seta. Mom's calling. Just hold that thought. You can tell me next time, okay?"

"Sure..."

"Bye!"

"Bye..." The phone clicked. "...I love you."

* * *

At school on Monday, the class was buzzing with news of the Friday night fight. As the twins entered the room, the talking stopped. The students all stared at them. Ren glared at the ogling teens, then grabbed Lien's hand and walked to their desks. Murmurs about her hair could be plainly be heard, but that didn't mean they were any less cruel than normal.

"What'd she do?"

"Looks like she got into another fight – this time with a pair of scissors – and lost...again!"

"It's all sticking up!"

"She looks like a guy!"

"Shh! Don't say that! You'll be insulting Ren! HAHA!"

Ren turned and shot a death glare at the last commenter. "I'm already plenty insulted, believe me." He turned and took the last few steps to his chair.

Tadashi waved to them as they sat down, trying to smile. Lien gave him a small smile, but said nothing. He looked at her hair, curious and confused. Soon, he came to the realization that she had felt possessed to part with the long hair she had loved so dearly. It was a way of protecting herself. Smiling, he leaned over.

"I like your hair. I mean it."

Lien blinked at him, subconsciously touching her choppy tufts. Her family's hairdresser had tried to even out the ends, but instead opted for a choppy style, saying that if he had made it all one length, there would be next to nothing left. Her parents had agreed, only wanting to make it look like it hadn't been the rash decision of a disturbed girl. It now resembled her brother's, with hair around her ears. Slightly longer, but no tongari.

Tadashi motioned to the purple clip that was keeping her bangs from her eyes. "It seems a butterfly has chosen to land on your head. You're as beautiful as a flower even without your long hair."

She looked surprised, then glanced at her feet. "Thank you..." she said quietly. He smiled and nodded at her.

"What about _my_ hair, Tadashi-_kun_?"

He looked up to see one of the popular girls twirling her hair around her finger. His eyes projected anger and annoyance, but he still smiled at them.

"I'm sorry, but I can't seem to find a single fuck to give."

The girl looked shocked, as did her friends. She looked at the ground as tears filled her eyes. "Tadashi-_kun_..."

Her friends stepped in front of her, obviously displeased.

"Hey, Tadashi, what was that for?"

"Yeah, you didn't need to be so mean to her!"

"And I thought he was NICE too."

"What a jerk."

He turned his head. "Your opinions don't matter to me. The only opinion that matters is Lien's. Maybe even Ren's sometimes. But the rest of you can kiss my ass."

The class was staring at him.

"And another thing, the next person who calls me 'Tadashi-KUN' is going on a one-way trip out the nearest window, courtesy of moi. You're not my friends, so stop treating me like you are. And we're not in Japan if you haven't noticed. Get your own honorifics."

A boy stood up, rolling back his sleeves. "You think just because you're Japanese you're better than us? Come on, prove it! You got your ass handed to you on a silver platter in that fight we're hearing so much about, so you can't be THAT tough!" He swung back.

"Hai-Si! Are you trying to start a fight right before class?"

The boy froze and looked back as Ms. Wong stood in the doorway, about ready to pounce on him in order to break up the fight she was anticipating. He lowered his arm and turned away.

"Damn Jap ain't worth my time."

"Unlike you, I won't resort to a racial slur in order to show my superiority," Tadashi said coolly. "I can demonstrate that in other ways."

The teacher looked around the room, noticing the annoyed faces of some and the frightful ones of others. "I don't know what's going on here, but it's going to stop. Any disruptions, and you'll be pick all the dust off the floor with tweezers. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, Mrs. Wong."

"That's more like it. Now, on to today's lesson..."

But many of the students weren't paying attention. Instead, they glared at their classmates in the corner of the room.

* * *

Later in the day, Ren and Tadashi stood to go to lunch. Tadashi looked around the room only to see sour faces. He sighed, then looked behind him.

"Hey, where's Lien?"

"She went to the bathroom about five minutes ago."

Some students scampered toward the door as a crowd formed, catching the boys' attention. They walked over and pushed through them. As the scene came into view, they saw two boys cornering Lien.

"Dammit...Ren we gotta do something," Tadashi said as he took a few steps forward.

Upon examining the look in his sister's eyes, Ren grabbed his arm and pulled him back. "Just watch for now."

The prince looked back at him with clenched teeth. "How can you just stand here as she's being targeted – AGAIN?"

"Just watch. Trust me."

Tadashi reluctantly stepped back and watched the scene unfold.

One boy sneered and leaned toward her. "So, I heard you really put out for those guys from Bao Fu High," he said. "We were just hoping we could get a little of the same treatment."

The other boy tugged on her skirt. "It's no big deal, right? I mean, you've done it before, right?"

The students around them began buzzing with the apparent new facts that had developed.

"She had sex with them?"

"Seems like she was willing, too!"

"That slut!"

"Wonder how many times she's done Tadashi..."

"It's always the quiet ones, isn't it?"

Tadashi clenched his fists. "It's not true...she's not like that..." he whispered darkly. No one heard him.

He looked at Ren to see a drop of blood fall from his fist. His pupils had nearly dissolved as he tried to focus on the situation, clearly trying to keep himself from having another violent outburst.

"Dammit..." He turned back to watch for Lien's reaction.

She looked up at them, emotionless. "Do you really believe that?" Her voice was flat and dead, her eyes void of any feeling whatsoever.

"That's what we heard. So, what do you say?"

"We promise we'll be gentle." One boy chuckled and put his hand on her thigh.

In one swift movement, Lien backfisted the boy in the face, knocking him to the ground.

"Don't. Touch. Me." she whispered darkly.

"You little bitch!" the other one cried.

He went to grab her, but Lien swiftly kicked him in the jaw. Before he fell, she grabbed him by the collar, disdain apparent in her eyes.

"Should I continue beating you? Hm? Are you satisfied yet?" Without waiting for an answer, she slammed his face into a locker. She gazed at the bloodied visage and grinned weakly. "Is this your first taste of pain?"

"S-Shit..."

"I know what you're thinking...'We never expected her to fight back! We just wanted someone easy we could use as a toy!' Am I right?" She threw him to the ground and turned toward his accomplice. "Now, as for you..."

"Lien, STOP!"

Lien was frozen as Tadashi's arms wrapped around her, pinning her arms to her sides. From the crowd, Ren sighed.

_That imbecile._

Lien looked at the boy embracing her, her eyes like a pair of dark voids. "What do you want?" Her eyes narrowed. "I see...you're sticking up for them because they're humans like you, right?"

He shook his head furiously. "You're wrong!"

"...What?"

"It's...it's because...The Tao Lien I know isn't like this!" he cried. "I...I know you were hurt on Friday...and I know that I have no idea how scared you must have been...but if you change like this, you're letting them win! You're-"

"Who are you to say I wasn't always like this?"

He looked at her, confused.

"How do you know this isn't just an ugly part of me I've always hid away?"

"You have no reason to hide who you are in your own house!"

She stiffened. "I've changed since then. I'm sick of all this ugliness. All this pain. I hate everyone in this school...in this country...maybe even this world...I HATE THEM!"

He grabbed her shoulders and kissed her. The crowd, which had been shocked enough by the girl's words, now let out audible gasps. As he pulled away from her, he smiled weakly.

"Then just hate me instead." She stared at him. "You hate that, don't you? Then direct that anger at me – no one else. Go on, hit me as much as you want." He let go of her, leaving her free to do as she pleased. She glowered at him, then swung her hand back. Tadashi closed his eyes as he prepared himself to receive the blow.

But the hand stopped just short of his cheek and instead touched it lightly. He opened his eyes as it left to see Lien fall to her knees, sobbing. A dull roar came from her classmates, who were confused as to what had come over the angered girl.

"Why..." she whispered, "...why are you asking me to hit you when I told you that night that I wouldn't do it again?"

He smiled at her. "See, you're not as evil as you're trying to be. Now, aren't you hungry? Let's go with Ren and get some lunch." He held his hand out.

She looked up at him slowly, then down again. Timidly, she grasped his hand and he pulled her up. She stared at him as he continued smiling. He turned and pulled her through the crowd, making their way outside. Ren joined them after promptly separating them.

They sat under a tree and the boys opened their lunch bags. Lien stared at them until Ren produced a second box and handed it to her.

"You forgot to make one this morning," he said. "You were so out of it, like a kyonshii." He looked down before taking a bite of his rice. "I...was a little worried."

"Niisama..."

He looked up at her with soft eyes. "I was worried this whole weekend. I don't like it when you're not happy. It...bothers me."

She blushed and looked away from him.

He looked at Tadashi. "But thank you for stopping her. You're right, Lien isn't really that type of person." He looked down. "I guess my father was right to trust you." His attention shifted to Lien, who was sitting on her legs and scooting closer to him.

Tadashi smiled softly at her. _She's so damn cute... _ "Ren, if it's okay with you, I'd like to take Lien out on Friday."

The twins looked up at him curiously.

"On a date?"

"No, not really. I just want to show her a good time. I mean...she can't stick by you forever, as cute as it is to watch."

Lien bit her chopsticks, still silenced by what she had done. Her brother looked over at her, his face showing mild approval of Tadashi's proposal.

"Do you want to?"

She looked at him, then at the boy across from her. After staring at her food, she nodded.

* * *

"Why did you want to take me out, again?"

"Because I want to make sure you have the chance to do something you've always wanted to do."

"...and that is...?"

"I don't know, what is it? You tell me, and I'll make sure it happens. I'll treat it as a dying wish."

Lien stopped and stepped away to clear a path for the people behind her as she thought. "I...I've always wanted to play the piano for a lot of people...like...a concert..."

His eyes widened. "You play the piano?"

"I used to...then I got embarrassed because Papa would always read with the door open so he could hear me. I felt stupid when I messed up because he could hear me."

He grinned. "Well, 'Papa' isn't here now, so let's go!" He grabbed her wrist and started sprinting toward the train station.

"Hey, wait! How do you know where to go? You just moved here!"

He looked back at her. "I've gone to all the squares and shopping centers in the area! I made sure I memorized each place so no matter what you wanted to do, I'd know where to go!"

He stopped as they approached a turnstile and he handed her a card. "You know how to use these, right?"

"Of course I do! I'm not stupid! I have to take a train every time I go see Seta!"

"Hehe, you're so cute,"

"Bwah?"

They boarded the subway. Tadashi casually looked out the window as it began moving. "I'm so glad I moved here...everything is so beautiful..."

Silence.

"Aren't you going to say 'Just like you,' or something like that?"

He chuckled. "What need is there if you already know what I'm thinking?"

She blinked at him. "You make no sense."

They soon got off at a plaza and Tadashi began guiding her through the crowds of people to the center of a park. The further they went in, the less people there were. In the very center, away from the trees, sat a piano on the marble-tile ground.

Lien stopped short and stared at it. "...How did you know this was here?"

He smiled. "I told you, I wanted to make sure I knew everything about my new home. I spent all my free time checking this place out." He went behind her and gave her a very light shove. "Now go on. I want to see you play. I want to hear how talented you are."

Her cheeks reddened as she timidly sat down on the bench. She turned around. "T-There's no one here."

"Well, I couldn't book a symphony hall, so this is the best I can offer. I bet some people will come when they hear you."

Still unsure, she lifted the wooden covering in front of her and looked at the clean, shining keys. Her hands shook as she finally raised and then set them upon the glistening bars of white. After a deep breath, she began playing.

Tadashi closed his eyes and listening to the song resonating from the piano. He barely heard the approaching footsteps as a story formed in his mind in accordance to the music. He looked back to see a child leading his mother up to the where they were. As he turned his head back around, his eyes widened, then he smiled.

Lien's eyes were closed, her movements a telltale sign that she was completely absorbed in what she was playing. Even her breathing seemed in harmony with the tempo of the piece she was playing – one that Tadashi had never heard before.

Finally, her hands stopped dancing. She exhaled, then opened her eyes as she sat up. She jumped, almost falling off the bench.

"W-Where did these people come from?"

She swiveled around to stare at her audience, filled with those young and old, that had appeared in the square. They applauded her, and her face turned red as she tried to graciously accept their praise.

Tadashi touched her arm as he came up behind her. "Play and they will come...or something like that, right?" He laughed.

"When...did they all...get here...?"

"By the time you were halfway through the piece...What was that anyway?"

She looked down. "I...I wrote it. It was part of the reason why Papa wanted me to take lessons...I started making up stuff before I even really knew how to play. That's the one I first came up with...the one I like most."

He hugged her from behind. "Well, you were amazing. I'm so glad I brought you here."

Lien smiled. "Thanks for bringing me."

"Hehe...Now you can die happy?"

"Yeah..."

He smirked, his eyes flashing. "I'm glad."

* * *

"This is your apartment?"

"Yup. Nice and cozy."

Lien walked into the flat and gazed about. "I've only been in one or two of these..."

"Go on...I want you to feel comfortable here."

She turned to look at him. "What? Why?"

He looked at the ground sheepishly. "I feel bad about what happened...I wish I could have done something to help you more than I did...My home was so close...That's why..." He reached into his pocket, pulled something out, and held it in his fist.

Lien scooted over to him and looked at it curiously. "What is it?"

He turned the fist over and opened it. Inside was a key. He offered it to her.

"I'll understand if you're a little freaked out...but I want to make sure you know that if anything like that ever happens again, you can come here for shelter."

She stared at him, then took the key and smiled. "I appreciate your concern, Tadashi. I really do. I'm lucky to have a friend that cares about me so much...I promise I'll come here if I feel like I'm in danger." She slipped the key into her pocket.

"Can I kiss you?"

She looked up at him, shocked. "What?"

Tadashi was looking away from her. "I know I'm in no place to ask for such a thing, but the more I look at you, the more I want it."

She closed her eyes for a moment, opening them to look at the ground. "Tadashi I..."

"I know you don't love me...I'm fine with that, I really am. As long as you're happy, that's all that matters to me...I just need this one last time...Then I'll be able to let go."

He looked at her, his face bright red. It was the first time she had seen him like this.

"Tao Lien...I love you," he said. "And I promise I'll always be here for you...even when other men make you cry. I promise I'll do as much as I can for you...even if it's to get another boy to like you. These feelings are going to be with me until the day I die. I just want the person I love most to be the happiest person in the world." He clenched his fists. "But please, let me be selfish just this once...let me kiss you one last time...because I know that I'm never going to get another chance."

There was silence as they both stared at the floor. Tadashi's heart sank as he knew that with each passing second, a "no" was becoming more and more likely.

"...I don't know how to kiss, so you're on your own for that part."

His head picked up. She was looking at him out of the corner of her eye.

"B-But if you really feel like you need to, I'll let you...as long as you understand that I don't love you. I'm doing this because of what you've done for me."

He looked up at her. "Thank you." He walked past her into the kitchen. "Let me make you something."

Lien looked at him, confused. "But what about...?"

He smiled at her. "I want to catch you off-guard. You'll be so much cuter that way."

About fifteen minutes later, they sat down at the small dining table with plates of spaghetti and tomato sauce.

Lien rolled some of the pasta onto a fork. "I don't get to have this that much...we usually have all this traditional Chinese food at my house." She held up the fork, which was covered in spaghetti. "You eat it like this?"

Tadashi laughed. "No, not like cotton candy." He used a knife to push the pasta off. "Just do it like this." He stuck his own fork into his food, bringing up a few noodles. "You don't need to take so much at a time. Just a little bit." He ate it.

Lien blinked and stared at her food. In an awkward motion, she scooped some up and shoveled it into her mouth. "Wike dish?"

Tadashi stared at her. "...So this is the refinement of the Tao Family...wow..."

Lien's face turned red and she quickly swallowed what was in her mouth. "I-I'm sorry about that! I usually don't talk with my mouth full...it's so rude! Mama and Papa taught me much more manners than that, really!"

He chuckled. "I'll never get over how cute you are."

She looked away, taking another bite of her dinner. "Whatever..."

Later on, Tadashi took down a photo album from one of his bookshelves. "Let me show you my friends back in Japan," he said.

"Okay. I have to admit I _am_ kind of interested."

They sat on the couch and started going through the photos.

"This is my dad. He used to work for a big insurance firm...He died during a robbery when he was at the bank. Since my mom was never around, he had to raise me all by himself."

Lien froze. "I...At my house, you said he was gunned down on the subway on his way home from work..."

His face twisted in thought. "Did I? Hm...maybe that _was_ how he died..." He shrugged and turned the page. "I try not to dwell on it...doesn't change the fact that he's gone." He pointed to a photo. "This is me in junior high with a few buds of mine." He flipped the page. "These are pictures of right before I moved here. I had this little junior high kid that followed me around sometimes. See?"

He pointed to a picture. Lien squinted her eyes. "...You're the only one in that picture."

He looked at it. She was right. He chuckled nervously. "Whoops, wrong page! You're so sharp! Eh heh heh..."

He flipped the page. Just him. He kept flipping. All the pages were filled of solo pictures of him, looking like he was posing with other people. Some were ripped in half, as if to hide the fact that another person had been there. He finally dropped the book. Lien looked at him with pitying eyes.

"Maybe there's another album somewhere..."

"NO THERE ISN'T!"

She jumped, not used to hearing him yell. He grabbed his head, his eyes wild. "B-BAKANA! THERE'S NO WAY THAT ALL OF THOSE PICTURES ARE GONE!"

"But Tadashi...you're the only one in them..." He started shaking, and she put her hand on his shoulder. "Can you remember the name of the boy that used to follow you around? You must if you took pictures together, right?"

He froze and looked up. "He was...he was...U...No, maybe...S...I...I don't know...SH-SHIRANAI!"

"Maybe it's because you're so worked up," she said. "Maybe once you calm down, you'll remember. For right now..." She stopped as he began murmuring to himself, his voice becoming more and more desperate.

"Wakaranai...Dou iu koto nano...NAZE...NANDE...NANDATTE? **DOUSHITE**? ARIEMASEN - **ZETTAINI FUKANOU DESU**!"

He kept repeating the words over and over again. Lien remained seated next to him, unsure of what to do. She had no idea what this meant. She didn't know how to calm him down. There was nothing she could...

_Wait..._

She would never do it otherwise, but it tore at her heart to see him like this. Gently, she patted his head and got him to look at her.

_I said I would...so I'm doing it...I never wanted to believe it before...but...he __**does**__ need someone._

"Lien...?" His eyes were red and swollen, a sight she had never wanted to see.

"Please don't cry," she whispered. She gently wiped his tears away before scooting closer to him. _I'm not cheating...I'M NOT! _"Tadashi-kun..."

He glanced at her, confused at how she was addressing him. Lien just smiled weakly.

Gingerly, she leaned over and let her lips press against his. Tadashi sat there for a few moments, immobile, then wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. Even when he pushed her down on the couch, she refused to hold him or touch him in any way. She was only doing this because she thought it would make him forget about those stupid photos.

But then his lips left hers and started trailing down her neck. Her eyes shot open and she struggled, grabbing the wrist of the hand resting on her hip.

"No! S-Stop it, Tadashi! STOP IT!"

He immediately let go of her and sat up. Her eyes were watering and she was breathing heavily – not from excitement and desire, but from desperation and fear. Ashamed, he turned away from her.

"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to go that far..."

She calmed down slightly, then sat up next to him. "It...It's alright...I just...remembered..."

He looked at her. "I would NEVER do that without your complete and total consent. Even if you said it was alright, I'd keep asking you if it was what you really wanted. And I promise I'd make it as special as I possibly could. It...It wouldn't be my first, but I know how precious virginity is." He smirked at himself, turning away. "I wish I had waited...I can't even remember who my first time was with..." He looked at her again. "But I'll never be like those disgraceful pigs...that I can promise you."

She was just staring at him, her face bright red. "Why talk about things like that? I...I already told you that I love someone else."

He lunged and hugged her. "I don't care. No matter who you love, no matter who you're with through out the course of your life, Lien, you'll always be in my heart...and if they make you cry, I'll always be there to pick up the pieces. Just please...keep being my friend...let me stay beside you...I...I want to protect you as much as I can. I'll get stronger, even if it means joining Ren on the martial arts team. It doesn't matter to me. All that matters...is you."

As he let go of her, he saw that she was sobbing, trying to wipe her eyes with her palm.

"What's wrong?"

She looked up at him. "I...I'm so sorry...I really am...You...You're just so loving...and you want to do everything for me...but I...I can't find it in me to feel the same way...I just...these feelings for this other person...they're too strong, and I can't just forget them!" She fell against his shoulder. "I don't want you to be alone...I wish you'd love someone who deserves it more than me...someone who won't be so ungrateful...If I could...I'd love you with all my heart and soul and make your loneliness go away...but I can't...I JUST CAN'T, AND IT HURTS!"

Tadashi looked at the arm of the sofa, his eyes filled with doleful bliss. He reached back and grabbed tissues from the night stand beside the couch, then began wiping the young heiress's eyes.

"Don't cry, Lien," he whispered. "Feelings aren't something we can control, no matter how hard we try. We can love people who have hurt us so badly that we think dying would be easier. We hate people who touch our lives and support us without a second thought. You're not to blame."

"But I..."

"I want you to go to this person you love and tell him how you feel, then you won't have a need to cry at all. You'll be happy. Anyone in their right mind would feel blessed to know that you want to be with them."

"But if he...he..."

"If he, by some rare chance, doesn't accept your feelings..." He wrapped his arms around her again. "You can come here, and I'll hold you just like this until your tears stop."

"Tadashi..." She closed her eyes.

He looked at the clock; it was past eight. "It's getting late, I'll walk you home."

She nodded. "Okay..."

They were silent as they walked. Each kept glancing at the other, but always looked away when the other turned to look at them. Finally, Lien opened the door to the large manor.

"Thank you for today," Lien said. She smiled. "I had fun...and...um...your cooking was nice..."

He laughed. "I should be thanking you. If you weren't there, I don't know what I would have done."

She looked down. "I didn't really do anything."

He smiled. "It's okay for you to deny it. At least I know the truth."

She shied away behind the door. "You're so dumb..."

He tilted his head and smiled at her. "Maybe I am."

Silence.

"B-Bye!" She went in and slammed the door.

Tadashi looked at the ground, his smile slightly faded, then went home.

As he sat on his couch again, he flipped on the TV and stared at it, the pictures reflecting off his dark eyes. As his vision was blurred, he fell back against it.

"Why am I even here?" he whispered. "When I moved here, I thought I had a purpose. Someone came to me in a dream and told me to come here, that Lien needed me...But she doesn't. SHE DOESN'T NEED ME AT ALL! She loves someone else, and he's not me. Even if she said that stuff to me, it doesn't change the fact that she didn't tell me she loves me."

He stared at the open photo album on the ground.

"I can't even remember what life was like before her. I can't remember that boy's name. I can't even remember what he looked like. What color his hair was...

"For some reason, I thought I'd find Kaasan if I came here." He laughed. "No, of course not. If she left dad so soon after I was born, she wouldn't show up so easily. She probably left just because she didn't want a son."

He looked over at the club photo sticker placed on a nearby photo frame. Both contained pictures of him and Lien from that day.

"Are you going to disappear someday too, Lien?"

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He touched his lips. "But she did that on her own. Even if it was just to calm me down, she cared enough to do that." He opened his eyes. "C'mon, Tadashi, stop being so depressed," he told himself. "At least she cares about you that much." He sighed, then got up and went over to the fridge. "Still, a little cookie dough never hurt anyone..."

But as he took the metal cooking bowl filled with the god-given food from the rack, there was a knock on the door.

"Who...? Maybe Lien forgot something?"

Setting the bowl on the table, he looked through the peephole in the door. He froze for a moment, then frantically reached into his pocket and pulled out the slim metal case. He compared the contents to what he saw through the hole, then stuffed it back into his pants as he threw the door open, tears in his eyes.

"Kaasan..."

* * *

Lien closed the door and leaned against it, her eyes fixed on the floor.

_Tonight. I'm telling him how I feel._ She squeezed them shut. _I'm so scared...If he says no, My whole world will turn upside down_.

"How was it?"

She looked up to see her brother standing there, his arms crossed. She looked away.

"It was fine."

"He didn't treat you badly?"

"No, of course not."

"I thought not. Just making sure." He turned to leave. "Come on. Mother's been worried sick about you. You know her – she finds it hard to let go."

Clenching her fists, Lien look up at him. "Niisama."

He turned back around. "What is it?"

_Don'tblushDon'tblushDon'tblush..._ "Can I talk to you about something?"

"What about?"

_!_ "I...need some advice on something."

He gave her a kind smile. "Of course. Come to my room later, I just need to work out first."

She nodded, then followed him into the living room where their parents were resting. Pin-Mei sprang up and threw her arms around her daughter.

"Welcome home! How was your date?"

Lien looked away. "It wasn't a date."

"It wasn't? Oh...well...Still, how was it?"

She smiled. "It was fun. He was really nice to me."

"Well, that's good!" her mother said excitedly. "Did you kiss?"

"Pin-Mei, don't be so nosy," Ren called from his chair. "Besides, she said it wasn't a date. Listen more carefully."

"I did listen! I was just checking! I mean, our first kiss wasn't on a date!"

Lien blinked. "It wasn't? What happened?"

"Well! Your father and I-"

"Pin-Mei..." Ren warned.

The younger Ren sighed and left the room. "I'll see you later, Lien."

His sister nodded. "Yeah..."

Their father studied them. "Is something wrong?"

Lien shook her head and smiled nervously. "No! I'm fine! I-I'm going to my room, bye!" She sprinted up the stairs and slammed her door shut. Pin-Mei blinked as Ren turned back to his book.

"Is she...alright?"

"I don't think there's anything wrong with her. She probably just wants to be alone."

But as Lien went up the stairs, she turned to see her maidservant following her. She smiled weakly.

"You always know when I need you."

Sheng bowed her head. "It is my duty to sense when you need assistance."

Lien ran into her room and belly-flopped onto her bed. Sheng looked over at her, her face placid.

"Mistress, is there something the matter?"

Lien rolled over, looking up at her with red eyes.

"Sheng...have you ever wanted to tell someone something so badly, but you're afraid of how they'd react, or how they'd treat you afterwards?"

Her guardian thought for a moment. "Forgive me, Mistress, but I can't say that I have. However, for your sake, I will pretend. What do you need to tell this person?"

Lien clenched her fist. "That I love them...and...that I want to be with them."

She nodded knowingly. "Who are you telling?"

Lien opened her mouth, then closed it. She whimpered and curled up into a ball.

"Mistress?"

A mumble. Sheng's eyes widened slightly.

"Who?"

"NIISAMA!" Lien yelled, uncurling herself.

Sheng stared at her. "But...But Mistress, with all due respect, such a union is-"

"I KNOW IT'S WRONG!" her master screamed. "DON'T YOU THINK EVEN I WOULD KNOW HOW GROTESQUE IT IS FOR SIBLINGS TO LOVE EACH OTHER? DON'T YOU THINK I'VE TRIED MY FUCKING HARDEST TO IGNORE HOW I FELT? YOU DON'T KNOW, SHENG, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO LOVE ANYONE! SO DON'T TRY TO LECTURE ME ON HOW AWFUL I AM TO LOVE MY BROTHER THE WAY I DO!" She went back into her ball and cried.

"Mistress..."

"L-Leave me alone...Get out of my room..."

Sheng closed her eyes and turned to leave.

"If you tell anyone about this...I'll make sure you're killed."

She froze, knowing such a threat was empty, but that the master she knew would have never threaten her with a penalty of death.

"I'll be praying for your happiness, Milady."

She left.

* * *

"Bocchama, this humble maid has brought you some milk,"

Ren looked back at Huan with an evil eye. "Thank you...you may leave it right there."

"Of course, Bocchama." She set a tray carrying a pitcher of milk on his dresser, then took a cup and brought it over to him. "Here."

"I believe I told you to leave it so I could get it when I felt like it."

"My apologies, Bocchama. This one was only considering that you may be fatigued after your workout, so she decided that maybe she could be helpful by bringing it to you."

Ren studied her, then took the cup. He sipped it, and, deciding it was okay, took a drink from it. Huan smiled as she watched him.

"Is it to your liking, Bocchama?"

"Yes...Yes it is..." He glanced at her. "Is there something you want?"

She waved her hand in front of her face. "No, no. This one just likes watching Bocchama sometimes." She closed her eyes and put her right hand on her heart. "She gets a warm feeling in her heart when she knows that Bocchama is content."

He paused, then drank the last bit of milk, finishing the glass. He held it out to her and she took it from him. She glanced at him as he yawned.

"Is Bocchama tired?"

"Maybe..."

"Shall this maid tell Ojouchama not to come?"

"No, no...she said she needed me for something, so I'll stay up as long as she needs me to."

"Bocchama loves his sister very much."

"Of course I do...she's the only one I have..." His eyes were closing.

"Bocchama has a soft spot?"

"None...of...your...busi...ne...s...zzz..."

He fell onto his bed, sound asleep. Huan's eyes flashed as she smiled at him.

"Bocchama is so adorable when he sleeps."

* * *

Lien heard the door open. She looked back, her eyes still red and wet.

"Huan? W-What are you doing here?"

The maid smiled as she closed the door. "This humble maid heard Ojouchama was distressed."

"...Did Sheng tell you that?"

"She only said that you were upset, but this one knows why that is, and she thought she would be able to help you."

Lien put her head on the mattress. "How could YOU help me?"

"This lowly servant knows that Ojouchama loves Bocchama."

Lien's eyes shot open as she bolted upright. "H-How did you know that?"

Huan giggled. "Ojouchama is so funny. This one has known you for so long, she knows when you're in love."

Lien looked at her rug. "Are...Are you going to tell me how wrong it is for me to love him the way I do?"

Huan shook her head. "Not at all, My Lady. This maid believes this is better than you loving a stranger. If you can just get up the courage to tell Bocchama your true feelings, This one is positive that he will accept them."

"But..."

"Ojousama, your stress is going to make this a dreadful experience. You should go into this with vigor and confidence. He is your first love, is he not?"

"He is...I just...don't want to make things awkward with him..."

The maid looked at her sympathetically. "Ojousama, come here," she said pulling a slip of paper from her sleeve. "Smell this. This humble maid assures you that it will calm your nerves."

Lien sniffed the air. "It's...sweet," she whispered. She took the slip of paper and smelled it.

Watching her, Huan looked at the characters written on the back of it. She smiled.

"Huan Xiang," she whispered.

Lien's body slumped over and fell to the floor. The servant cackled and knelt down beside her, tearing the girl's clothing and dirtying her face.

"You want your brother's love so much, Tao Lien," she whispered in a mocking voice. "I can't guarantee that you'll get that, but at least my family will get a show we won't soon forget.

"Who's the lead actress? Why, that would be you, you foolish little Tao."

* * *

"Reeeeeennnnn," Pin-Mei called in a sing-song voice.

Ren sighed as she took the book from his hands and tossed it behind her, then seated herself sideways in his lap. He looked at the clock; just a little past nine.

"It's too early to go to bed," he said stoically.

She giggled, then nuzzled her cheek against his. "That's not what I want right now," she said. "I was just thinking...we should go on a trip soon. We haven't gone anywhere alone since our honeymoon in America. Wouldn't it be nice to get away?"

"And this came from where?"

"Just thinking about how much I like being alone with you. I love our children, too, but everyone deserves a break now and then, right?" She kissed him and he smirked at her.

"You thought out what you were going to say, didn't you?"

"Hehe, you could tell?"

"I see through you like a window."

She hugged him and he finally put his arms around her.

"Fine, fine, where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere with a spa. I won't be picky this time."

"Alright, we'll plan something for next month, how about that? Will that satisfy you for right now?"

"Yes." She clutched him tighter and kissed him. "I love you."

He smirked again and cupped her cheek. "I know." He kissed her. They smiled at each other before Pin-Mei lay against his chest.

"And since the twins get along so well, we don't need to worry about them fighting or anything, so we won't need to have anyone mind them." She sighed happily. "We're so blessed to have such wonderful children."

"I suppose we are."

"P-Papa..."

"Speaking of which...What is it, Lien?" He turned his head slowly, then stopped. His eyes widened. Pin-Mei leaped from his lap so he could dash from his chair to his daughter. He grabbed her shoulders. "Lien! What the hell happened?"

Her clothes were torn, as if she had been struggling, and her neck and face were bruised. She touched the inside of her leg, then looked at her hand. Ren's gaze fell on it, a look of horror flooding his eyes.

Blood.

"Papa..." she whispered, tears in her eyes.

Ren tried to stay calm. He had to be the rock she seemed to need at this moment. "What...?"

"Papa..." she whispered again. She fell to her knees and he hugged her close to him. "I...I just wanted to talk to Niisama..."

Ren's eyes widened, then narrowed in rage, the culprit of his daughter's pain becoming clear. He held her tighter as she quivered and sobbed into his shoulder.

"Papa...w-why...is it always m-me...?"


	74. This is How We Crumble

So, the general consensus is that last chapter was strange and that incest plus rape makes for uncomfortable reading. Noted. But I thank those of you who are choosing to stay with the story despite your adversities to the subjects dealt with in last chapter. I am, by no means, glorifying them.

We have a 30 page chapter on our hands. This is why it took so long.

For the longest time, I've been trying to find a suitable voice for adult!Pin-Mei, since Yui Makino, in my eyes, is incapable of doing a voice low/grown-up enough for someone in their late thirties. I found someone...sort of. I have no idea who this person is, but they play Tidus's mother in Final Fantasy X. I'm on a manhunt to find her name. I will! Even if I have to email Square Enix or buy the international version of the game! (okay, maybe I won't go that far. That's some serious cash we're talking about there)

**Notes: I DON'T recommend using Pin-Mei's little trick to unlock the door. If not done correctly, you could hurt yourself and/or wreck some perfectly good silverware. Don't blame me if you don't heed me warning.**

**There are some graphic descriptions of torture in this chapter which may be disturbing to some people.**

**Again, no, I'm not trying to make Ren1 look like a bad guy.**

**Lien's ringtone is the first line of the chorus to "Brave Heart" (by Megumi Hayashibara) in English. I am in no way claiming that I wrote that line myself.**

**Pin-Mei's flashback of her watching the Shaman Fights with Zhang is inspired by Ren's Q&A section from the Mankin Fan Book. Yes, he does actually say most of these things.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Shaman King or its characters. The only ones I own are the original ones, which are basically everyone in this chapter except for Tao Ren.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Four: This is How We Crumble**

* * *

Lien's eyes shot open. She calmed as her sleeping mother's face came into focus.

_Mama..._

She looked down and saw a hand resting on her arm. Gingerly, she looked over her shoulder to see her father sleeping behind her. Her head fell back down against the pillow, trying to remember what had happened the night before.

* * *

_Lien continued to sob into Ren's shoulder as his eyes remained transfixed on the ground, burning with rage. Pin-Mei finally knelt down and began stroking her daughter's hair._

"_I...I don't know what to say," she whispered breathlessly. "I never expected such a thing from him."_

_Lien turned her face to hide it from her mother's view, her wails unrelenting. Ren seemed to hug her for a moment, then gently placed her in his wife's arms. He stood. Pin-Mei looked up at him, her eyes fearful._

"_Ren, where are you going?" He began walking away. "Ren!"_

"_I'm going to have a talk with him."_

_She studied him for a moment before shaking her head. "You're lying." She started following him._

"_Stay there with Lien," he commanded._

_She looked back at the shell sitting on the ground that was her daughter. Betwixt, she finally let him go. "Don't hurt him!" she called._

_Silence._

"_Promise me!"_

_Ren stopped for a moment. "...I promise I won't kill him."_

"_That's not good enough!"_

"_Well, it's going to have to be, because I'm in no mood to compromise."_

_With that, he began running down the hall and up the stairs. She stared after him, eyes wide, then looked at Lien, and back at the darkened hallway. __Níu-Năi__ appeared, looking back as his father passed him._

"_Where's Dad running off to?" he asked._

_Pin-Mei was silent for a moment as she allowed the guilt of what she was about to do take over. She ran past him. "Mommy needs to go help Daddy, so take care of your sister for a few minutes!" She vanished as she ran down the darkened hall._

_Níu-Năi blinked, then looked at Lien. He could see the tears in her now reddened eyes and the blood on her legs. Still confused, he strode over and stood in front of her. "Hey, Neechan, what's wrong? Watcha crying for?"_

_She looked up at him for a moment, then started crying again. She knew that she couldn't burden her brother with something as large and complicated as this. Her little brother looked down, his bangs covering his eyes._

"_It was rape, wasn't it?" he murmured, his voice deeper and more mature than his age should allow._

_Lien just hid her face from him. He took another step forward and placed his hand on her head._

"_Parts of you reminds me so much of her," he whispered. "Things like this…what's happened to you…I wasn't able to save her when the same thing happened. But unlike then, the one who defiled you has allowed you to live…And that's what you have to do, Lien."_

_She looked up at him with wide eyes, stunned that he was saying such things, especially addressing her by her given name, which he had been told was disrespectful._

"_It must have hurt for him to take you like this, even if you love him. But Lien, for the sake of your family, if not just for yourself, __keep on living__. Your family loves you too much for you to give up." He smiled down at her. "This boy loves you as well."_

* * *

Lien silently turned to look at her father. _Papa, what did you do after that? Why am I in your and Mama's bed?_

She looked at the sky through the window. It was still pitch black outside. No stars could be seen. She knew that there wasn't anything to do except sleep, so she closed her eyes, trying to push any nightmarish thoughts from her mind.

* * *

The next morning at breakfast, Ren and Pin-Mei didn't look at each other. Lien just looked at the bowl of rice in front of her. Níu-Năi, having no idea what was going on, stared at the empty seat to the right of his father.

"Hey, Dad, where's Niichan?"

He didn't look up. "Sleeping."

"Oh...Shouldn't one of us go get him?"

"No. I'll make sure he gets something to eat."

Pin-Mei put down her bowl and set her chopsticks in their holder. "I'm done," she announced quietly. She took the bowl and stood to walk out.

"You're not bringing that down to him," Ren said apathetically. "You can't open the door without a key."

She stopped dead in her tracks. "Will…Will you bring it to him?"

"If I remember to, maybe. Rest assured, he has pains far worse than those of hunger."

Pin-Mei looked over her shoulder. "How can you say such things about your son?"

"I'm eating at the moment, if you can't tell. I'll answer any questions you have concerning the decisions I make as the head of this family when I'm through."

Pin-Mei slowly placed the half-eaten meal on the counter. She glanced at her husband once again. Without another word, she left the room.

Stiffly, she walked to the study and took down the photo album, then sat down in a chair as she flipped through it. Her and Ren's meeting…their wedding…the births of their children…their growing up…As she stared at all of it, she couldn't stop a tear from leaving her eyes. There were so many wonderful memories, but now they all seemed so far away.

_What's happened to him? Why is he so cold now? He's always had that in his personality, but he still could be empathetic…_

She meant to go look at the pictures of her and Ren as teenagers again, but she went back too far and saw pictures of En and Ran instead. Her shoulders drooped. They weren't here anymore. They had left this world only a few years before. Ren had been devastated by Ran's death, but less so by En's. It was evident that there was still a little bit of hatred from his childhood locked inside his heart.

She closed the album and stared at the ground.

_As his wife…the one who loves him most…it's my job to bring back those happy days._

The question was…How?

_But first…I want to see my son again._

* * *

Pin-Mei lay awake as she stared out the window. Night. It had been almost three days since her family had been turned upside down – since she had seen her son. That night had been hell to her, between watching her daughter suffer and her son being accused of such a heinous crime. As much as she tried to block it out, the horrific memories of what happened that night wouldn't leave her alone.

* * *

_Ren pressed himself against the wall to the right of his son's door. He listened for any movement from within the room. Hearing none, he slowly turned the knob, opened the door, and peered inside._

_His son was laying on his bed, chest-up, shirtless, and passed out. Ren's fist clenched as he saw that the cloth rope typing the pants was undone, and were slipping down ever so slightly._

_"Didn't even have time to cover yourself up, did you, you little bastard?"_

"_Ren!"_

_He snapped his head back at the sound of his wife's voice. She was running up the stairs and would be there any second. Quickly, he opened the door fully, went inside, then closed and locked it._

_He stared down at the sleeping boy, bloodlust in his eyes. Pin-Mei arrived, signaled by fruitless attempts to open the door, but he ignored her._

_The teen stirred, no doubt awakened by his mother's pounding. Groggily, he opened his eyes. He looked up at his father as his vision cleared and came into focus. The noise registered, finally, and he looked toward the door, still half asleep._

"_Father...? What's going on?"_

_No reply. He got up and seemed to be going to the door. Ren grabbed his son by the throat and threw him against the wall. The heir remained there for only a moment before slumping to the ground. The bureau next to him shook, and a milk bottle fell to the floor and shattered. He looked up at his father, one eye closed in pain._

"_Father...What's going on? Why...?"_

_Ren walked over to him and offered him his hand. After his son hesitantly accepted, he pulled him in and kicked him in the face. With another swift kick, he was launched toward the full-body mirror on the back of his door. The scion crashed into it, his right shoulder taking most of the impact._

_The mirror shattered, the broken pieces covering his skin and cutting it. Blood was running down his face, clouding his vision as he looked up at his approaching father. He stood, bracing the mirror's frame for support, his stance shaky. He remained silent, knowing that none of the many questions he had would be answered._

_There was no scream from beyond the door, which told Ren that Pin-Mei had run back to the kitchen in order to use her special trick to unlock the door. He had to act fast._

_His father grabbed him by the arm and spun him around, forcing him to go face-first into the western wall. Ren grabbed the boy's shoulder and jerked him around so that he could look him in the eye. His son just stared back at him with dull eyes, breathing heavily as the blood dripped off his face and onto the carpet. Ren grit his teeth and slapped him across the face, as if the mere sight of him was enough to make him nauseous. As the wounded heir recoiled, he grabbed him by the throat and pinned him against the wall. The boy gagged, trying to grip his father's wrists in order to get him to let go, but in his clouded state, any effort he made was futile. Ren brought his face close to his son's, causing him to still. _

"_Scared yet?" he whispered. _

_The yellow eyes before him merely shifted slightly. He spied one of the family daggers on the bureau next to him and grabbed it. The blade glistened, his face being reflected off it._

"_Should I just kill you now?"_

_He swung at him, stopping less than an inch away from his son's throat. The blade grazed his skin, causing tiny drops of blood to fall on it._

_His prey looked down slightly, not believing the position he was in. Trying not to let the fear that was building show, he looked at his father._

"_Why...are you doing this to me? What have I done that could possibly make you want to kill me?"_

_He watched the elder Tao's eyes burn with rage as he threw the dagger behind him, opting to put the now free hand with the other around his son's neck._

"_YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST PLAY INNOCENT AFTER WHAT YOU JUST DID? DID YOU THINK SHE WOULDN'T CRY – THAT WE WOULDN'T FIND OUT? DID YOU THINK THAT WE WOULDN'T DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS?"_

"_About what?" he screamed back at him._

"_ABOUT RAPING LIEN! YOUR OWN FLESH AND BLOOD! YOUR ONLY SISTER! YOUR__**TWIN**__ FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"_

_The twin's eyes widened in horror. "What...? Me...? Do that to her?" His eyes darted to the ground, then around the room as he shook his head wildly. "I...I'd never do that! I love her! I'D NEVER DO THAT!"_

_The Tao head's eyes narrowed. "Oh, you __love__ her, do you? What happened? Did you develop these sick and twisted feelings for her and finally confess tonight?"_

"_No! I haven't even seen her since she came home!"_

"_Did she reject you?"_

"_No!"_

"_Did you get angry, and decide that you were just going to __take__ what you wanted from her? Just because you knew you could easily over power her?"_

"_No! I LOVE HER LIKE A SISTER – NOTHING MORE!"_

"_THEN WHY DID YOU DO IT?"_

"_I DIDN'T!"_

_Minor tinkering could be heard before the door flew open, revealing Pin-Mei with a small butter knife in her hand. Ren ignored her and began strangling the suspect._

"_Was she that worthless that you can forget what you did to her so easily?"_

_The teen choked._

"_Ren! Stop it! You'll kill him!" _

_She ran over to try to separate the two, but her spouse just swatted her away like a pest. Turning back to his target, he resumed his punishment._

"_People like you don't deserve to live," he growled in a low voice. "I wish every person with the same sick thoughts as you would die and vanish off the face of the earth."_

_His son's eyes widened._

"Freaks like you don't deserve to live!"

"Yeah, all you stupid Shamans should just die in a ditch somewhere."

"Shot in the head, execution style!"

_The young Ren's eyes seemed horrified. He screamed and began thrashing about. Pin-Mei looked at him and the look of utter terror in his eyes. She ran up to her husband and shoved him, but he again paid her no mind. But when one of the arms hit his face, he grabbed the suddenly pained area, dropping the boy and allowing him to fall to the floor. _

_His mother watched him as his body began shaking uncontrollably. She pushed Ren out of the way and knelt down to wrap her arms around the bloodied scion. To her surprise, he showed no displeasure from her doing so, and she sadly stroked his hair. Ren sighed, obviously annoyed._

"_You don't care about what he did to Lien?"_

"_I do," she said, not looking up. "I...I just want to hear his side before we punish him."_

"…_school…"_

_She tried to look at his face. "What is it? What did you say?" When she finally saw his eyes, they were finally showing every ounce of terror he was feeling._

"…_Don't make me go to school," he murmured. "…I don't want to get beaten up anymore…Just let me stay home…"_

"_Ren, what are you talking about?" She pushed him away enough to get a better look at his face. But before she could do anything else, he was yanked from her arms. She looked up to the angered man above her._

"_He's just scared out of his mind, as he should be," he said quietly. His eyes narrowed. "Look at me." His victim obeyed. "I thought I raised you to be the next head of this family. I spent – no – WASTED my time training you so you would be able to protect this family with your life if need be. Above all else, what did I tell you your most important job was? Who is the one that you're supposed to protect more than anyone else?" His son looked down. "ANSWER ME!"_

"_L-LIEN! YOU TOLD ME I HAVE TO PROTECT LIEN!"_

"_That's right. So what did you do? YOU DID JUST THE OPPOSITE!"_

"_NO! THAT'S NOT TRUE! I-I'D NEVER HURT MEI-MEI!"_

_Ren spit. "Fine…If you really believe that, I'll just have to beat the truth out of you."_

_He swiftly landed a punch to the teen's solars. The younger Ren lurched forward, coughed up some blood, then went limp. His father threw his body over his shoulder and began carrying him out of the room. Finally broken from a trance-like state, Pin-Mei followed him._

"_What are you doing?" she cried._

_He didn't look at her. "I'm teaching him what happens when you cross the line, commit the ultimate taboo, and become nothing more than an animal."_

"_But...we haven't even-!"_

"_We don't need to let him speak. Just looking at Lien says volumes about what happened. Speaking of which, go to her and take care of her like I told you to."_

"_But they're both my children – OUR children!"_

"_Feh. This monster isn't my child."_

"_W...What did you say?"_

"_I no longer consider this...this __**thing**__ my son. I guess I'll just have to put all my faith in __Níu-Năi__ from now on."_

_Pin-Mei stopped and stared after him. He ignored her as he continued on, then pulled a chain, which opened a passage to the basement._

"_Where are you taking him?"_

"_Downstairs," he replied curtly._

_That answer wasn't good enough._

"_WHERE?" she yelled._

"_Ryuyou no Ma."_

_He hurriedly slammed the door behind him as he went down the stone steps. She went over and inspected the lock. Unlike last time, her knife-unlocking technique was useless here. Not knowing what else to do, she returned to the living room to check up on Lien._

* * *

She closed her eyes, hoping to block the scenes from her mind. It may have worked for a little while, but she would have to open her eyes at some point.

Ren's back was to her, allowing her to deal with her guilt on her own. They had made love about an hour before, but passion had been the last thing on her mind.

_If I can tire him out enough, it will give me time to search for the key to the basement – and the Ryuyou no Ma._

She was disgusted by her own methods, but she needed to see her son. She needed to talk to him, to assure herself that he was innocent, despite all the evidence being against him. Her eyes drifted back to her husband.

_I love you so much…And I promised that I would be there to support you until the day I die…but I can't support this…I'm sorry._

Slowly and quietly, she slipped out of their bed and crept over to their discarded clothes. When he had thrown his pants away, she had heard a faint "clink", which led her to believe he kept them in somewhere in there. Sure enough, on the inside, she found the collection of keys attached to a loop. She fished them out and held them close to her.

_I'm coming, honey._

She warily stood and left the room, closing the door as quietly as she possibly could. She went down the stairs one by one, step by step, bringing her feet together on each one. If she was loud, the slightest noise would echo throughout the large halls, and she would be discovered.

But as she saw the door to the basement, she darted to it and hurriedly tried each of the keys until one finally worked. She ran straight down the halls to the door at the end. Two kyonshi stood guard on either side of the door. They glanced at her, but she sternly held up the keys, insinuating that she had permission to be there. With a shaking hand, she put a key with a dragon-graced shank and bow into the lock and turned it.

She thought she heard a sound from down the hall and jerked her head around, still trying to fiddle with the lock as she did so. Not seeing anything to confirm any fear she had of being found out, she turned back as she jiggled the lock and pushed the door open slightly.

Even with the door open just ajar, she could see Ren slowly lift his head to look at her. His eyes widened.

"Mu Qin!" he cried, tugging against his shackles. He softened. "I knew it was you…since it took you so long to open the door." A sad smile spread across his face. "But I'm glad you came…I missed you."

Her heart melted. He was chained with his arms above him, seated in the infamous dragon chair. Trying to stay strong, if only for his sake, she ran over to him, sat on the chair, and thrust her arms around him. Instantly, he winced and groaned, causing her to quickly pull away.

It was then that she noticed the cuts, bruises, and welts that covered his body. Blood ran down his arms and torso, some dripping down onto the chair. She looked down at herself to see that her nightgown was covered in it.

Knowing it was already ruined, she tried hard to rip a piece off so she could wipe his face, but it refused to cooperate. Frustrated, she looked around the room, finally spotting a towel in the far corner. Upon inspecting it, she saw red spots already on it, but found a section clean enough to wipe his face with. As she leaned in, she spied a large gash that stretched across his chest. She reached to touch it, but retracted her hand.

"Oh my gods…" she whispered, no longer able to restrain her tears. "What has he done to you?" Again, she motioned to touch his wounds, causing him to inhale deeply.

"Whipping me, beating me, tossing me around the room like a rag doll…just…a lot of pain." He looked down as he felt his body get warm.

His mother's eyes were closed as she concentrated her furyoku into her left palm. He felt the pain slowly dissipate as his wounds healed. But before she could make them all disappear, she stopped.

"I don't want him to know I was here, so I won't heal you fully. I just wanted you to get a little bit of relief." She looked up at him, trying to smile, but seemingly failing.

"Mu Qin…"

Her eyes wavered sadly before resting upon him again. "Ren, please be truthful with me – Did you rape Lien?"

He shook his head, keeping steady eye contact with her. "No, I promise you that I didn't. I hadn't even see her that night since she had come home."

She was glancing down.

"Do…Do you believe me?"

Pin-Mei smiled ever-so-faintly. "I…I don't understand what's going on…" She looked up at him. "But I trust you. I know that you're very protective of Lien and would never do anything to hurt her."

Ren let his head droop, hiding the bittersweet tears that were coming to his eyes. "Thank you, Mu Qin, for believing me."

She reached up and stroked his cheek. "You're my son, my first-born child, one of the most beautiful things in the world to me. I know you better than anyone else; of course I trust you." She hesitated, then gave him a quick, motherly kiss. "You're precious to me, and I love you so much."

Silence.

"Mu Qin…" he whispered. His voice was shaking.

"Yes?"

"W…Will you hold me? Like the way you did when you arrived?"

She stared at him. It had by this time been nearly eleven years since he had requested such a thing from her. In fact, none of the things he had said or done just now were like the pompous, confident, seemingly apathetic son she had gotten used to.

It was then that it hit her – the reason why he has started flailing, shaking, and crying.

_The way Ren treated him must have reminded him of how he and Lien were harassed at school…almost like some sort of shellshock._

"I'm…I'm scared…I'm scared of what Father's going to do to me next," he whispered, his voice shaking.

Without another thought, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him. She rubbed his back in a soothing manner, reminding her of when, as a child, he would often seek her comfort.

"_Mu Qin, I...I had a bad dream."_

_Pin-Mei looked at him groggily, then reached out to stroke his hair._

"_Ow," he murmured. It was dark, which had caused her to accidentally poke him in the eye._

"_Sorry, sweetheart." She corrected herself. "What was it about?"_

"_You and Father died."_

_She nodded, understanding his fear. "Don't worry about such a thing. We won't leave you and Lien until we're very, very, VERY old. Basically, when Daddy stops saying Mommy's pretty."_

"_...well then you'd live forever..." Ren mumbled beside her, turned away from them and half asleep. She smiled. He was too sleepy to know that they weren't alone, or he never would have said such a thing in the presence of their children. After all, their father, someone they deemed one of the most powerful people in the world, would never be so mushy._

"_B-But it's still scary," her son whispered. He looked at the ground. "W-Will you stay with me until I fall asleep again?"_

"_Of course." She got out of bed and motioned to pick him up._

"_...Make him walk," her partner growled._

_Sighing softly, Pin-Mei took the small hand in hers and led him from the room. Once she knew they couldn't be seen, she picked him up and carried him to the room he and his twin shared. She gently set him on the bed and wrapped the covers around him. Beside them, Lien moaned and turned over. Pin-Mei smiled and began gently rubbing his back. He was still a little tense, so she thought up a game._

"_Let's practice your Japanese."_

"_Huh?"_

"_Using my finger, I'll trace some kanji on your back, and you tell me what it is."_

"_O…Okay…"_

_As it went on, she could tell that he was getting sleepy again._

"_I love you, Mu Qin…" he whispered, his eyelids drooping._

"_I love you too, sweetheart."_

"_Thanks…for staying with me…"_

_She giggled. "That's what mothers are for."_

She had always longed to treat him like that again, but not under these circumstances.

"Mu Qin…I'm so scared of Father…of what he'll do to me next."

She could tell he was getting anxious because of the desperation in his voice, so she tried to soothe him. "Shh…Don't worry. I'll talk to him and have you released."

"He…he won't listen…He's already convinced that I did it. If there was any doubt in his mind, he wouldn't be doing this."

"No, I promise I'll get you out of here. Trust me."

"Mother! You don't understa-!"

She felt him freeze, his muscles tensing up. His body shook, causing his chains to rattle.

"It seems as though Lien wasn't enough for you. You feel the need to take my wife as well."

Pin-Mei whirled around to see Ren leaning against the door frame. His eyes were closed, and he looked calm – which scared her. She knew that he should be enraged. After all, she had slept with him for the sole purpose of getting the basement keys so she could see her son – something which he had basically forbade. This silent anger of his was something the family had learned to fear. She tried to laugh it off.

"Ren? What are you doing up at this hour?" She looked at her wrist, as if checking an imaginary watch. "Why, it's three hairs past a freckle already!"

She laughed nervously, but fell silent when he simply opened his eyes and focused on her. He slowly stood, leaving the doorway, and began walking over to them. She left the chair as he approached, choosing to stand in his way should he try to attack the petrified boy behind her.

"What are you doing down here? I never gave you permission to take my keys." He held them up, as she had left them in the doorway in her haste.

"I only wanted to see my son."

"You should have asked me before you came here."

"I didn't because I was sure you would say no."

He turned his head. "Tch. You've had your reunion, Pin-Mei, now go back to bed. I'll be there shortly."

She shook her head. "No."

He faced forward again, his eyes narrowing. "What did you say?"

She took a deep breath clenching her fists as she tried to find the courage needed to defy him. "I said no. I'm…I'm not going to let you abuse him any longer."

He glared at her, obviously unhappy that he was being challenged. "Oh?"

"I want this to stop, Ren! Don't you understand what this is doing to our family? What this is doing to Ren? To your son?" she cried.

"I already told you, I don't consider-,"

"That doesn't matter to me right now! Right now, you're torturing my son and I want you to stop! If you want to punish him, then just hold him in a cell somewhere, unrestrained! He's not some murderer, Ren! He doesn't need to have his arms chained, nor does he need to bleed!

"Have you even been feeding him? Have you been letting him drink something when he's thirsty? I can already tell from looking at him that he feels weak, and that shouldn't be since many of his wounds are gone!"

Ren looked past her, noticing the blood no longer covering his son's body. He didn't look pleased.

She grabbed his shoulders. "Please Ren, stop this! Can't we wait until we investigate this a little further? Lien didn't even outright say that he was the one who raped her! It could have been one of the servants or something! Please, just reconsider, I'm begging you…" She started crying. "I don't want to see him get hurt anymore, so please, just end this and let him go. Please…"

He looked down at her. "Pin-Mei…"

She smiled faintly, feeling as though she was finally getting through to him.

He frowned. "Don't stop me from protecting this family."

Her eyes widened as she was grabbed from behind, one arm wrapping around her waist, pinning her arms to her sides. She looked at him in disbelief.

"Ren?"

He shook his head. "I'm sorry."

She tried to free herself. "Re-!"

A handkerchief appeared, covering her nose and mouth. Before she could stop herself from doing so, she inhaled. Her vision became fuzzy for a few moments before everything went black. Her body went limp as Li caught her, putting the cloth in her pocket.

Ren sighed, looking at the ground sadly. "Put her in our room for now. I'll have to decide what to do about this later."

She nodded. "Yes, Milord." She carried the body out.

Ren followed her to the door, locking it as she left. Before he did so, however, he pulled in a cart full of large tubs, then carried a few buckets of water in. As he set them down, he didn't look at the boy who was now at his mercy. Then suddenly, he spoke, his voice low.

"You see what you've done?"

The young scion was shaking more than ever. She had promised to get him out, but, as he had predicted, her words had fallen on deaf ears.

"I've never done anything to harm her like that…and now I had to." He jerked around, his eyes filled with rage. "ALL BECAUSE OF YOU!"

He grabbed a bucket of water and splashed it on his clone, causing his tongari to vanish. The boy spit some water out of his mouth, then tried to look up. But because his soaked bangs were covering his eyes, it was no use.

There was a crack. Ren winced as he felt the whip's tough leather rip at his skin. Again and again, he grit his teeth and bore the pain. His father stood by and watched as the kyonshi tortured the son he had once loved so much. When no cries of pain were heard, he stopped them.

"Get the board."

They retrieved a long piece of plywood with leather straps attached to it from the far side of the prison. The Tao head brushed the boy's bangs from his eyes. Wide yellow eyes looked around frantically. Ren grabbed the boy's chin and turned his head to look at the plywood. The kyonshi were pouring water into what almost seemed to be watering cans.

"See that? Let's see how smart you are and see if you can tell me what it is and how it's used."

The scion was shaking again, his eyes wide and transfixed on the wooden board. "W-Waterboarding...a form of torture e-employed by the United S-S-States during the Iraq War...By evoking the sensation of d-drowning...military officials b-believed they could g-get a-answers from terrorists about their base's l-l-location..."

Ren nodded. "That's right. And what are the risks associated with it?"

"L-Lung damage…brain t-trauma from lack of oxygen…long term m-mental scarring…"

"Isn't there one more?"

He swallowed. "I-If the process isn't stopped in time, the person could d-die…"

"Really? Hm. Let's just hope you'll confess before that happens."

Ren looked at his father frantically, hysteric tears falling down his cheeks. "Please, don't do this, Father! I-I don't want to die! P-Please, Father! Let me go! I-I love you, Father! Please don't kill me!"

His father was silent as he stared at the floor. "If you really loved me," he said finally. "You would have continued being the obedient, strong, and empathetic son that I raised. You wouldn't have done something as demoralizing as this."

"I didn't, Father! I swear it wasn't me!"

Ren sighed and shook his head. "You have no idea how much I want to believe you…But everything points to you, Ren."

"But Father-!"

"Why did you have to do this?" he whispered. "I had been so proud of you, of how you had turned out…I was confident that when I died, the family would be left in capable hands, that I didn't have to worry about it. But now…" He looked up at him, a tear peeking out of the corner of his eye. "I even brought myself to admit that, as your father, I loved you…But you betrayed my trust and you've broken Lien, possibly beyond anything that therapy and time can repair. I can't forgive you for that."

Without another word, he removed his chains, knowing that the wretch was in too much pain to move. He threw him onto his back on the piece of wood and watched the kyonshi strap him down. His son just stared up at the ceiling, his face pale, as he knelt down next to him.

"If you confess, then I won't do this to you. I can't say whether or not your punishment will continue as it has, but if you just tell me the truth, then we can start putting things back to the way they were."

The youth didn't look at him. "Tell Mother, Níu-Năi…and Lien…that I love them."

He was choosing to die.

Ren clenched his fist, then threw the cloth over his face. A kyonshi held it in place as another got ready to start pouring water it.

"I wish things didn't have to end like this, Ren. But I've given you enough chances. If you decide to confess while this is going on, as you're about to die, then we'll stop."

Silence.

"Start."

The water came down, and he started struggling, as if he were somehow hoping that he could overcome such a trial. Ren looked on. Ten seconds had passed already.

_I guess I won't be keeping my promise._

Fifteen seconds. He was still struggling, but they held him down. Over the splashing, Ren could barely hear screaming.

"PAPA!"

Ren quickly turned to the kyonshi. "Stop," he commanded, and they obeyed.

"PAPA! What's going on?"

His eyes widened and he stared at the door. _That can't be…_

He sighed, then ran over to it, unlocked it, and opened it slightly.

"Lien? What are you doing out of bed?" he asked, trying to sound casual.

"I...I heard yelling," she said softly. "It sounded like Niisama...What's going on?" She looked past him to see her brother on the floor, the cloth still covering his face. "Is that Niisama?" She motioned to walk over to him, but her father blocked the way.

"No, it isn't. It's a burglar that I found lurking about and trying to sneak into the castle. I'm letting him know why no one trespasses on this property. Go back to bed, Lien. There's nothing for you to worry about."

She stared at him, her yellow eyes dull and void of light. "Papa...why are you lying to me?" His eyes widened as he studied her. "I know it's him; I can feel it. What are you doing to him?"

Knowing that he couldn't continue lying to her, he decided he might as well tell the truth. "I'm punishing him for what he did to you."

Her eyes widened. "How? What are you doing?" She tried to look past him again, but he got in her way.

"It's fine, Lien. I'm only giving him as much pain as he gave you."

"Let me see him, Papa."

"No. Just go back to your room."

"I miss my Niisama, Papa."

His eyes narrowed. After what her twin had done to her, she still felt his absence and was seemingly bothered by it. "How can you find it in your heart to pity him after what he's done to you?"

She looked at the ground. "Because I...I still love Niisama..." She wiped her eyes. "Please let me see him, Papa."

Ren glanced down for a few moments, then reluctantly moved out of the way.

She nodded at him. "Thank you, Papa." She numbly walked past him and knelt down next to her brother. Slowly, she grasped the cloth and lifted it off of his face.

As soon as it was off, Ren started gasping for air, still looking at the ceiling. His eyes were wide, and his face showed hints of blue. It was clear that he had been knocking on death's door.

"Niisama..."

He froze, then slowly turned his head to look at her. "L-Lien..."

Their eyes met, but then she looked away. As she breathed deeply, seemingly trying to keep herself together, his gaze trailed to the ground.

"Why..."

He looked up at her.

"Why did you do it, Niisama?" she whispered. "I...I don't understand. You were always kind to me, Niisama, even if you were cold at the same time. I thought I could trust you…"

Ren looked down again, saying nothing. He couldn't deny to the very person he had allegedly hurt that she was wrong, that it must have been a dream.

"It…It hurt so much, that you would do such a thing to me." She looked down at him. "Why aren't you saying anything? Does that mean you're not sorry for what you did?"

_It's impossible for me to feel sorry for something I didn't do._

"I understand…" She wiped her eyes. "Ahaha…I'm so stupid. After all this, I still love you. I should hate you so much…I should be afraid of you. The very sight of you should sicken me, but it doesn't. You're not even remorseful, but I can't bring myself to hit you." She covered her eyes with her palms. "I hate the things you do to me."

Her brother squinted at her, mildly confused by the last comment. She saw this when she brought her hands down, and smiled weakly.

"It's nothing…I'm guess I'm just delusional after all this stuff that's happened…Haha…."

She continued to laugh nervously as she stood up and started making her way to the door. Her father reached out to gently touch her arm, but she flinched. Seemingly ashamed, she looked down.

"Sorry…"

He understood why. "It's fine,"

She fiddled with her hands. "Papa…I know you want to punish Niisama for hurting me…And I guess I can't do anything about that, but please don't kill him." She saw his fist clench and she smiled weakly. "I guess I'm just hoping for an apology someday."

Ren nodded slightly, as if he accepted the request, but didn't dare vocalize it. "Let me walk you back to your room."

Lien didn't want his company. She wanted to be alone. There was too much for her to think about. Sleep wasn't really an option either. Her dreams were only nightmares. She hadn't gone to school in two days. They'd be sending a letter home soon. Or calling. She didn't know – she'd never had to deal with missing multiple days in a row.

Still, she nodded. "Thank you, Father."

He was trying hard, she could tell. She couldn't really remember a time when he had been so patient and understanding as he had been in the last few days.

Ren opened the door, guided her out, and shut it behind him, but not before glaring at the boy, who was still in a torturous position.

After they had left, the felon looked up at the ceiling again, his breathing finally returning to normal. The kyonshi stood around him like ugly stuffed animals, but he paid them no heed. They wouldn't move without his father's command.

His mind filled itself with his sister's parting words.

"_I hate the things you do to me."_

Something about it seemed so cryptic. Obviously she would hate him for what she thought he did to her, but "thing**s**"? He couldn't remember many times when he had done something to upset her that she would carry in contempt.

_What the hell was she talking about?_

The door slammed. He jumped (as much as one can when strapped down) and glanced over to see that his father had returned. In his hands, he carried some bread and some bottled water. Setting them down, he walked over and stared down at him.

"I don't know how she got down here, but consider her your savior. You were about to die and you know it."

Hesitantly, his son glanced up at him. "…You said it before you heard her. I heard her before you did. Then you sighed, and it sounded like it was with relief, not annoyance." He paused. "You…don't really want to kill me, do you, Father?"

Ren looked away, then turned. "I don't want to kill anyone. I decided that a long time ago. It doesn't make you special." He turned to the kyonshi. "Unstrap him."

The boy lay still as the leather restraints were unbuckled, not daring to move. Even after he was free, he couldn't move. The wounds he had received from the day's whipping still hurt, many thanks to the water that had been splashed on him.

"Can you sit up?"

Not knowing if he was being sincere or not, he tried to shift his arms back in order to push himself up. Futile. His father sighed, picked him up, and threw him over his shoulder. He then returned to the dragon chair and dropped him on it. Ren waited for him to chain his arms again, but he didn't. Instead, the bread and water from before were tossed into his lap. He looked up at his older self, confused.

"When they both ask me not to kill you, I have to keep that promise," he reasoned. "Make no mistake – I don't plan on releasing you anytime soon. But I might as well feed you as Pin-Mei requested."

The hungry boy couldn't stop the happy tears that were forming in his eyes. This was proof that somewhere, despite the beatings he had been giving him, he still loved him.

"Thank you, Father."

He turned and waved him off. "I'm not going to feed you myself, so you're just going to have to wait until you can do it yourself."

He began walking toward the door.

"Oh, I forgot," he turned. "Under the current circumstances, no, I don't plan on killing you. But, depending on our luck, I may or may not feel the same way in a few weeks."

He slammed the door shut and locked it.

* * *

Lien lay in bed, still not able to sleep. She looked at her cell phone which was resting on her night stand. Never before had she so badly wanted for it to ring. Tadashi and Seta had been the only ones outside of the family to call, and she hadn't heard from either of them.

_Oh yeah…something about exams…Seta has entrance exams and cram school to worry about…_

But where was Tadashi? She had called his house at least once everyday, hoping that he'd make good on his promise to hold her and let her cry in his arms. He hadn't been home. She didn't understand. The one time she needed people her age for support, they weren't there.

_It's…so lonely…_

She closed her eyes. Maybe she'd fall asleep again. Maybe, when she woke up, everything would be back to normal.

_**Faster than the wind, to your heart, I want to slide inside and wrap everything up…**_

She sprang up and quickly glanced at her cell phone before snatching it. A call! Finally! She opened it, smiling weakly as she looked at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Princess!"

She softened. "Hi, Tadashi…It's been a while. Where have you been?"

"Oh, I'm sorry! I forgot to tell you since I was so excited! Lien, GUESS WHAT."

"What?"

"I FOUND KAASAN!"

She smiled. "Really? That's great. Are you with her now?"

"Yeah, that's why I'm not home. We're in London."

"L-LONDON? But that's, like, half a world away!"

He chuckled. "Yeah, I know, but Kaasan wants me to meet an acquaintance of hers. We'll come back soon, though!"

"Good…I…" She blushed lowered her head, not that he could see. "I miss you."

There was silence. All she could hear was the background noise of the London streets.

"…You do?"

"Y-Yeah…Things just…it's been hard…"

"Really? What's going on?"

She paused, unsure if she should worry him like this when he was so far away. "Well, um, after you walked me home that night—"

She heard a woman's voice on the other end. Tadashi spoke back to her sweetly, then turned back to the phone.

"I'm really sorry, Lien, but Kaasan really wants me to get off the phone. I'll be home in just a couple days – promise! Then I can help you with whatever it is that's bothering you." He put his voice into a noble tone. "All who make my Princess cry shall perish at the hands of the mighty Prince Tadashi!"

She couldn't resist laughing. He hadn't changed, and for that she was glad. "Okay. Call me when you get home, okay?"

"Of course! I have a V-Day present for you, too!"

She blushed. "W-What? When did you-?"

"Hehe - See ya! Smile!"

He hung up. She looked at her phone before closing it and sighing.

It had been too short. For those few moments, she had someone to talk to, but now she was alone again. She curled up in a ball, hugging her knees.

"Maybe this whole thing is punishment," she murmured. She dug her head deeper into her arms. "If I had just given in to Tadashi's feelings, then I wouldn't have had to get hurt like this. It…It feels like rejection…even though he never answered me."

Had she even gotten the words out? She couldn't remember. She was already trying to block everything out.

"I just need someone…"

_**Faster than the wind, to your heart, I want to slide inside and wrap everything up…**_

She jolted from her huddled position, staring at her phone as the lights flashed and the melody played. Not bothering with the ID, she answered it.

"Hello?"

"Lien? Hey…Um…It's Seta."

An odd feeling of relief came over her. While Tadashi was willing to listen to her problems and could cheer her up, his energy sometimes overwhelmed her. Seta, on the other hand, was much more sensitive and she could feel more at ease when talking to him.

"Hi…Um…What's up?"

_Why is this so awkward?_

"My exams are done, so I just wanted to call and see how you were doing. I hope nothing bad's happened. How is everyone?"

She couldn't breathe. Should she tell him that his best friend was in the underground basement, locked up for the horrible crime he had committed against her? Or should she keep quiet and act like everything was okay?

"We...We're fine..." she lied. "You?"

"That's good...Um...I'm doing fine. I think I did well on my exams, so I'll just have to wait to see the results."

She smiled. "You're really smart, I bet you did fine."

"Ehehe...If only because my mom was breathing down my neck as I studied. My social life took a vacation."

"Well, she just wanted you to do well."

"Yeah, but your mom would have been nicer about it."

"Haha, but Niisama would be the one breathing down my neck instead!"

They laughed, but she froze, remembering her brother's battered body that was being held captive in the basement. She shook her head quickly, trying to get rid of the horrible thoughts.

"Lien..."

"Yeah?"

"Is it okay if I come a couple days early?"

"Eh?"

"I know it isn't right for me to invite myself...but I just miss you."

There was silence. He gripped the phone tightly, afraid that he had said something wrong.

"Uhh...Um...I'm sorry...I shouldn't-"

"Please come soon."

"What?"

She started sniffling, then whimpering as the stress she had been trying to keep at bay for the past few days finally crashed down on her.

"So much stuff has been going on," she said, her voice quivering and unstable. "Everyone's fighting it seems like...I can't even trust Niisama anymore...And Mama and Papa...they're...they're fighting too. I've never seen either of them like this before...I'm so scared..."

"Lien..."

"I'm just hoping that when you and everyone else come over, everything will go back to normal. I'm...so...lonely...I just want someone to hold me and be here for me, but no one can! They're too busy being pissed at each other!" She started crying harder into the phone.

Seta listened for a few moments. He couldn't remember her crying this hard since what had happened ten years ago. She was obviously grief-stricken, but the apparent isolation and loneliness had taken its toll on her (not that he knew about that).

"Don't worry," he said finally. "We'll be there within a few days. I'll bet my parents can at least help yours sort out what's going on, and I'll help you and Ren." He paused. "And…well…I mean…If you want me to, I'll hold you and you can tell me about everything that's bothering you. I promise I'll listen."

"Thank you…Thank you so much…I know I'll feel better once you and everyone else gets here. I'm so lucky to have a friend like you."

"D…Don't mention it…"

_I promise I'll make all the pain go away._

* * *

A day or so later, Ren had resumed his son's punishment, showing no remorse or sign of letting up. Pin-Mei would sit to the right of the door leading to the basement, cringing as her son cried out in pain. Lien, afraid to go to school alone, had a tutor bring her work to her and help her get it done. Her mind was far from schoolwork, though. The more she became aware of her brother's pain, the worse she felt. Níu-Năi was still in the dark about the whole ordeal, wondering why his elder brother was living in the basement. He hadn't spoken in that odd voice since the night of the incident.

Everything came to a head one morning as the four finished up their breakfast. Níu-Năi had had enough of his brother's absence, and demanded to know what was going on.

"Dad, where the heck is Niichan? He hasn't eaten with us for almost a week. And you guys haven't trained in a long time, either."

"I've been training you, though," Ren replied, not looking up.

"I don't wanna learn that stuff! That's Niichan's job! Where is he? And why do I have to do all the stuff he used to?"

Pin-Mei stood, taking Ren's bowl with her own as she made her way over to the kitchen. She put them in the sink and began half-heartedly washing them, her back turned.

"It doesn't matter where he is. If I tell you that I want you to train with me, that's what you're going to do."

The young boy slammed his fist on the table. "But Dad—!"

"Honey, just listen to what your father says. He's the one who makes the decisions in the house."

Ren looked up at her, seemingly surprised that she was agreeing with him. They had hardly spoken since he had found her visiting their son in his prison.

"Why, thank you," he said. "It's nice to know that you're seeing things my way."

She ignored him. "When you get older, sweetheart, I hope that the decisions you make will be just as beneficial as his have been."

Ren eyed her.

"Oh yes. I really hope that you find it a wonderful idea to forget your own faults from your past and lock up your son in the basement and inflict physical and emotional pain on him daily."

"Silence, Pin-Mei."

"I would be quite ashamed if you didn't use chloroform to knock out your devoted wife at least once. It's one of the most loving things you can do for someone."

Her son cocked his head. "What? Dad's beating up Niichan? What's 'color four'?"

Ren's fist clenched. "I said silence!"

Again, she paid him no mind. Instead, she turned around with a smile. "Why, if you don't try to mercilessly kill your son, it will be impossible for me to think of you as a man."

Ren slammed his fist on the table as stood, his rough actions causing his chair to fall backward. "PIN-MEI! If you so much as utter one more word about this, I'll-"

"You'll what? Throw me in the Ryuyou no Ma? That's fine. I'd like to see my son again, anyway."

Lien looked at her parents, an ill feeling in her stomach. She didn't like this, not one bit. Her parents were never like this - or at least, they weren't like this _before_.

Ren glared at her, gritting his teeth and clenching his fists. He grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her into the living room. Curious, Níu-Năi followed them. Knowing that this could potentially turn into something young eyes shouldn't see, his sister ran after him. When she got to him, he was peeking at the couple from behind the doorframe. She tugged on his arm.

"This is a grown up conversation, so we shouldn't be here. Come on, let's go play," she said, trying her best to sound cheerful.

Her brother glanced at their parents again before reluctantly nodding and following her. She led him far away from the room.

Ren and Pin-Mei stood in the center, him still holding onto her wrist. He tugged on it, pulling her closer until his face was close to hers. Though his eyes burned with an ire she had never seen directed at her, she did her best to remain calm.

"How DARE you try to make a fool out of me in front of our children!" he yelled at her. "And how dare you say such things about me at all! As my wife, you're supposed to honor me and support me, and you haven't been doing either of those lately! No, you're too busy defying me and trying to turn our children against me!"

"That wasn't what I was trying to do," she said firmly. "I think Níu-Năi deserves to be told what's going on. Can't you see that he obviously misses his brother?"

"It's MY decision whether or not he is told – not yours! You don't make any decisions here without first consulting me!"

She ripped her wrist away from him, rubbing it. "Ren, it's about time you drop this 'I'm a man so I'm better than you' mentality."

"What?"

"Yes, when we were younger, it was accepted. Times have changed. People are equal now! That means that I should have a say in all these decisions you make!" she cried.

He scoffed at her. "Who says we have to follow the world's values? Things have been fine, so we don't need to embrace these new ideas you've found."

She stared at him.

"Things have been like this between us for over twenty years, so I don't see why there's a sudden need for change. If anything, I think I need to remind you whose house this is and why it is that you're able to live so comfortably. The least you can do for me in return is be the wife you're supposed to be and-"

**SLAP**

Ren stared at the wall, his head turned to the left. His eyes were wide as his cheek began to burn. Pin-Mei stared at him, then at her hand.

_Oh gods…What have I done? Even if he's being irrational, I still love him! You don't slap people you love!_

But at the same time, she wasn't any less angry. Clenching the fist of the slapping hand, she put it rigidly at her side.

"What else can I give?" she cried. "I've given you everything! I've given you love! Gifts! Three beautiful children! A second home! I-I gave you my virginity for gosh sakes!" She closed her eyes and clenched the other fist as well. "There's nothing left for me to give! You're right, things WERE fine! Then you started this insane crusade to punish your first-born child! The boy you were grooming so that he would be able to take your place one day! And you even DRUGGED me! Supremacy or no, you don't do that to someone!"

She panted, out of breath from her ranting. Her hand was still burning as she waited for a response.

"Just go back to the way you were before, I'm begging you! The person I fell in love with and married and had children with wasn't like this! He was a loving person who did everything he could to avoid hurting people, yet still managed to protect those important to him! Where did that person go? I want him back! **I hate the way you are now!**"

He glared at her out of the corner of his eye. "I'd like to say the same to you." He turned to face her. "You were near-perfect before. You followed me without question and trusted my actions. Now, you oppose nearly everything I do!

"Have you ever thought of what would have happened if Ren and Lien WEREN'T separated after that night? What if he did it again? What if, when I wasn't there, he went after you instead? Did you ever think of that? I'm doing what I can to protect you and Lien from people who don't seem to value your pride, happiness, or your bodies. I DO! That's why I'm doing this! So stop this defiance of yours!

"What I'm doing is justice! I'm making him pay for what he did to Lien! It's just, it's right, and it's what anyone in my position would do! He deserves every gash, cut, and bruise that's on his body. If he finally admits to it, and then gets on his knees and begs for forgiveness, I may consider pardoning him. But until then, he stays in the Ryuyou no Ma. If you can't understand that then-,"

"…You're just like him…"

Ren froze. "What?"

"You're just like how En was when you were younger!" she cried, her face red. "You inflict pain and suffering on those you should love and protect, then vindicate it by saying it's 'justice' and what's right for the family! I've seen the recordings, Ren, so I know! Right now you're nothing more than a younger version of him!"

Ren stared at her for a moment, stunned. Then, his head drooped so his eyes were hidden behind his bangs. Pin-Mei relaxed slightly, remorse apparent in her eyes. She knew that Ren had tried so hard not to end up like his father, but apparently all that trying hadn't been enough. She took a step closer to him.

"…Ren? Are you-?"

Out of nowhere, his right hand appeared and landed a hard slap across her face. Eyes wide, she stumbled slightly, trying to get over the sheer force he had hit her with. Her hand slowly came up to rest on her left cheek as she looked up at him. There was no remorse whatsoever in his eyes.

"I'm NOTHING like him—**NOTHING**," he said in a dark voice. "Don't you DARE compare me to him! I let my children have a childhood! I let them make their own choices – I don't FORCE them to learn weapons or shamanic techniques! I didn't lie to them about who I was or hide behind a massive over soul! Unlike him, my reason for locking my son in the Ryuyou no Ma is justifiable! I'M NOTHING LIKE HIM SO DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT I AM!"

Pin-Mei stared at him. Her eyes were getting misty, and she felt as though there was nothing she could do to stop it. But she knew a rift was forming between them, and that she had to stop it.

"Ren…what's happening to us?" she whispered. "How did we get like this? Everyone would joke that we were so perfect, that we never fought, that we were meant for each other…What's happened to that?"

"It's obvious to me. You're older now, so you think you can tell me what to believe and how to run this family." He folded his arms.

She shook her head. "No, Ren! I don't think that way at all! I just…I just don't like to see Ren hurting the way he is. That's why I want you to stop punishing him."

"There you go again, telling me what to do."

"It was just a suggestion! One that I believe wholeheartedly in!"

"Uh-huh…"

There was silence. The rift wasn't closing. It was only getting bigger. She looked at the ground.

"Ren…tell me you love me."

"What?"

"Please…we haven't said it over the past few days. We're turned away from each other when we sleep. I don't like it. I don't want you to feel as though I love you any less, because it's not true at all!"

"I didn't appreciate being used a few nights ago."

Her heart stopped. That night, she hadn't even told him she loved him. Not once.

"I'm sorry! Ren, I'm sorry! Just please forgive me…I don't want…I don't want us to fall apart! I love you too much for anything like that to happen! I've loved you since I saw you, and I promised to love you until I die, and I will! I'll never stop!"

"…Why are you saying all this?" He seemed disinterested.

"Because it's true! I love you!"

"...Try telling me that when you're not trying to get me to do something. In fact, say it when I'm down there with Ren. Watch him receive his just punishment, then smile sweetly at me and say it. Then I'd believe you."

He turned and left as she fell to her knees. Just before he was out of sight, she looked up at him.

"Tell me you love me," she pleaded, her voice becoming hoarse.

He didn't reply. Devastated, she stared at the ground.

* * *

"_Father! Father! Rong just called! She said to turn on the TV because Ren's on there! Can I use yours?"_

_Pin-Mei stood back as her father opened the door. He was still bedridden, and normally refused to pay attention to her, so she was surprised that he had come to the door._

_He opened the door fully and stepped to the side, allowing the twelve year-old inside. She was astonished to find no women in his company, but she was grateful. She had him all to herself. Smiling, she hopped up next to him._

"_Thank you, Father!" she cried, clinging to his arm._

_He just nodded and pointed to the TV – the only one in the house. Pin-Mei hooted, ran over, and jumped on the bed. She knelt on the end, reaching for the remote._

"_Okay, she told me it was this channel…"_

"_**We're here with the captain of Team 'The Ren', who just won their second match," a woman said. "You must be excited! That was a breath-taking fight!"**_

"_**Hmph. I don't even need these clowns. I can defeat all of our enemies by myself."**_

_**The woman gave a fake laugh. "Well, well, the team captain sure has spirit. Pardon the pun."**_

"_**As long as Chocolove doesn't repeat it, I will."**_

"_**I appreciate it. Anyway, I have some BURNING QUESTIONS some members of the crowd would like to know. Can you answer them?"**_

"_**As long as you don't bore me…I'll answer three."**_

"_**Thank you! Anyway, regarding what you said before, what do you think of your teammates?"**_

"_**They're annoying, but I can count on them. Although as a team, they're only extra people!"**_

"_**Okay, next question. I thought you drink 3 bottles of milk everyday. Why aren't you getting taller?"**_

"_**It'll come later! It WILL come later! It'll come at once! Now come!" Passerby laughed at him. "SILENCE!"**_

"_**Alright…The last question comes from the supposed female members of the crowd. What kind of girl is your type?"**_

_**Ren folded his arms. "Hmph, I haven't thought about it much but at the very least she should always be out of my way and not be a bother!"**_

"_Okay!" Pin-Mei said. "I can do that!"_

"_**...And I like shorter girls better."**_

_Pin-Mei's face went red. She was already short for her age, so she knew she'd at least fulfill this requirement._

"_**Just one more?"**_

"_**Feh…Alright."**_

"_**Yoh has a fiancee, but do you have one too?"**_

_**Ren froze. "I think I've heard before that my father has a whole list of fiancée candidates. Of course it can't be one of the kyonshii...I think...I hope."**_

"_NO!" Pin-Mei screamed. "It'll be ME! We'll see each other again then he'll see that I'm that small type of girl he likes and he'll fall in love with me and then we'll get married and have children and live happily ever after!"_

_She blushed as she hugged her knees and stared at his face on screen. She smiled._

"_We'll love each other…forever…"_


	75. You Supply the Rumors

Just a little over two weeks. Awesome. I was working hard on this, reading parts over and over, skipping lunch at school, the works. So I really hope you all enjoy this :D

There's also a poll asking who your favorite of the "next generation" characters is. I may or may not make decisions based on the results, so if you have a minute, I encourage you to vote.

Am I the only one who thinks I should change the summary? -laughs-

**Notes: This chapter, it is mentioned how Rong and HoroHoro can't leave for China anytime they want to because of their jobs. What are these jobs, you say? Well, during Rong's first pregnancy, I figured HoroHoro would have a job as a construction worker, helping build houses and things like that, but almost still just a helper. Rong stayed at home and took care of Xue. Now, after going to college, HoroHoro owns a snowboard store. Go on, laugh. I couldn't think of much else. Rong, with her background as a guard, has an on/off job as a bouncer at a night club. That way, she still gets to beat up people – and get paid for it!**

**Consider "are" Xue's little sound of confusion.**

**More violence.**

**I added a nice little feature about Houraiken and how it's used/who can use it.**

**I really don't like how we don't know exactly where Tao Castle is. The Guizhou province is pretty big and has a lot of mountains. So when I say "a mountain" just picture one of the many around the castle's area.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga _Shaman King_ and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks. **

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Five: You Supply the Rumors, I'll Provide the Wrath**

* * *

Lien slowly walked back to her room. After shooing Níu-Năi away, she had come back to listen to what her parents were saying. What she heard had made her uneasy, but what she saw had horrified her.

Never before had she seen her parents lay their hands on each other in anything less than a loving way. Yet, there they had stood, each with a burning cheek and reddened hand. She had hid as her father left, listening to her mother cry as they both tried to make sense of the situation, albeit separately. Lien stood barely within earshot of her mother's crying, not being able to completely abandon her.

Horrible thoughts flashed in her mind. What if they divorced?

She pictured her mother being forced out into the cold with nowhere to go. Her father would have custody of the children, seeing as how her mother lacked a college degree, and would thus be unable to find a job that gave her the ability to raise them. Her mother…all alone…still crying to her husband about how much she loved him…What would that feel like?...What would she do for the rest of her life?...

…How long would that even be?

Lien fell to her knees, grasping her head, her eyes wide. "No…No…NO! I don't want a broken family! I want us all to be together! Why is this happening? They were so in love! Mama said she was going to ask him if he wanted to go somewhere with her, just so they could be alone like they were before Niisama and I were born! Why…Why did she have to ask Papa to tell her he loves her? WHY DIDN'T HE ANSWER?"

But as her own foolish cries left her lips, the sobs of her mother could be heard. She turned to see the distraught woman walk past her in a daze, mumbling to herself.

"If I hadn't changed…he would have told me he loved me…I know it…I shouldn't have gone against him…That's not my role…I'm the wife…All I have to do is love and support him…I won't go against him again…"

Lien stared at her as she trudged up the stairs and into her bedroom, shutting the door. She glanced at the ground again, only to look back up as a horrible wail came from the room a few moments later.

"Mama…" Her gaze went to the floor once more. "Isn't there anything I can do?" No matter how hard she thought, nothing was coming. "Darn it…How do I stop all this?" She clenched her fists and hid her head again. "I never should have tried to tell Niisama how I feel. If I hadn't…he wouldn't have…and then Papa wouldn't be…Is…Isn't there a way for me to be with Niisama, and have my parents stay together as well? A way so that we can all be happy?"

"Ojouchama? What is Milady doing on the floor?"

Lien looked up to see Huan staring down at her, a nervous smile on her face. She offered her master her hand and pulled her up.

"Is Ojouchama upset about something?"

Lien tossed her head away from her. She wasn't in the mood for this. "Did the red eyes give it away?"

"Ojouchama…This maid just wants to help her lady," the maid said. She quietly put her hands together. "And this maid knows what to do. This humble person can make sure both Ojouchama and Bocchama are happy together."

At this, Lien looked at her. "You…You can?"

Huan smiled and nodded. "There's one way that will make it so not even Master Ren can oppose Ojouchama and Bocchama's union."

Lien frantically grabbed her by her shoulders. "You can? HOW?"

She grinned.

"No one can defy the wishes of a god."

* * *

Pin-Mei slowly reached and picked up the phone. After staring at it for a moment, she slowly pressed the memory button, put it to her ear, and waited.

"Hello?"

She paused. "…Hi Horo, can I speak to Rong, please?"

"Um, sure," he replied, a little confused. She usually was all peppy, asking him how he was, forcing him to engage in small talk, and _then_ asking for Rong. Today, she sounded drained, as if she wasn't interested in anyone else's lives.

Pin-Mei leaned against the wall on her side, looking at the floor. She passed the phone from her left hand to her right, her ring catching her eye. Stone-faced, she put the hand out in front of her and studied it. Her eyes were apathetic as the stone glistened along with the platinum wedding band Ren had given her.

"_As the pledge of my eternal and undying love..."_

The arm snapped back to her side, her hand now in a fist. _Is that so?_

"Pin-Mei?"

She softened as Rong's voice reached her ear. "…Yes?"

Rong seemed to give a small nervous laugh. "Answer me before the fifth time next time, okay?"

Her head drooped. "Yes…alright…"

Silence. Rong seemed to be waiting for her to start explaining why she had called, but got nothing.

"What's wrong?" She chuckled for real. "Is Ren being an ass or something? Haha."

But when all she heard on the other end was silence, she stopped. Other times when Pin-Mei had called her sounding depressed, she would ask that same question. At this, Pin-Mei would usually fly into an explanation about why Ren had nothing to do with why she was upset, then would go on to tell about something nice he had done for her recently that had set her heart aflutter like a love-sick schoolgirl. By the time she was done, she had usually forgotten what had made her call in the first place, so they would have a normal, friendly conversation, devoid of drama and unhappiness.

But this time, there was no explanation. No stories of subtle sweetness on the part of her husband. Just a lifeless voice. But that wasn't going to tell her what was wrong. Her former master had called her for help, and she would be failing at her duty as a friend if she didn't get to the bottom of the situation so she could offer advice.

"Pin-Mei? What's going on? Is it something with Ren?"

A muffled noise of agreement. Rong blinked.

"An argument?"

Agreement.

"Verbal?"

Agreement.

"...Physical?"

No answer, except for a slight whimper. Rong froze.

"Pin-Mei...Did it get physical?...Did he hit you?"

"...Yes."

She stiffened.

"I...I hit him first...so I guess I asked for it."

She shook her head. "No, that's not right. You don't hit someone because they hit you. You're supposed to be the bigger person and let the violence stop there."

There was silence. Rong could hear more of the woman's whimpers, letting her know that her friend was lost.

"Rong..."

"Yes?"

"H...How many times has Horo hit you? I mean...since you got married..."

"Never."

There was a sharp intake on the other end.

"He hasn't laid a hand on me since I was pregnant with Xue, and he's never done more than the occasional name-calling when we're having those 'intentionally immature' fights."

Pin-Mei slumped to the ground. "Then it's not okay...? What...should I do?"

"Okay, slow down. First things first: what was the argument about?"

There was silence. Pin-Mei didn't know if she should tell her what was going on. There was no way of knowing how she would react.

"Ren…Little Ren, I mean, did something that displeased "my" Ren…I mean…they're both mine, but…"

"I get it."

"Right…well, Ren decided to punish him, and we're disagreeing on how that punishment is being carried out. Then I said something I shouldn't have."

"And that was…"

"I-I got so frustrated that I told him he was like his father."

Rong thought for a moment, biting her thumb. Unfortunately, she was unable to understand the sort of anger a statement of that nature would illicit from the head Tao. She looked behind her at HoroHoro, who was seated on the couch watching television.

"Hold on," she said.

"O…kay…"

She put the phone on the counter and turned to her husband. "Horokeu?"

He didn't turn away from the screen. "Yeah?"

Slightly irritated, Rong took the remote and switched the TV to the Sightseeing Channel, which had shots of mountains and flowers accompanied by classical music – a universal sign that meant, "Give me your attention now or I'll throw the TV out the window". It was only used when there was something serious they needed to talk about.

He turned around this time. "What's going on?"

"Horo, what type of relationship did Ren have with his father?" she asked after a brief pause.

His eyes narrowed and he looked at the ground. "I don't know the whole story," he said finally. "But I know their relationship wasn't the best."

"Do you know why?"

"He didn't treat Ren well when he was a kid, I know that. I guess you could call it 'child abuse'. He beat him up and things like that, ya know? Ren said he forgave him, but I don't really think it's possible to completely forgive someone who took your childhood and made it hell. I mean, come on, say Suo was here, and Pin-Mei said she forgave her after all the shit she pulled – would you honestly believe that she didn't still hold some things against her?"

Rong was silent, then nodded. "That's all I needed to know. Thank you."

"No problem, I'm your local database," he said smugly.

She smiled weakly, then picked up the phone again. "Hi, sorry."

"Where did you go?"

"Bathroom."

"I see."

"Anyway, I understand that saying that Ren's like his father would make him angry, but do you understand that no one, under any normal circumstances, has the right to hit another person?"

"I guess...but I still shouldn't have said it I think I knew it would cause him some amount of pain but I just didn't plan on the anger so it's my own fault I only have one person to blame and that's myself so really I guess I shouldn't even be calling-"

"Woah, HOLD IT!" Rong cried.

At that moment she knew that her friend really was distressed by whatever the situation was. Pin-Mei was known for going into fits of run-on sentences when she got excited, but that was when she was younger. She hadn't done it since becoming a mother at the very least. For her to deteriorate to this sort of state proved that her mind was overloaded with stress.

"Pin-Mei, listen to me: Ren had no right to hit you, and if you just let him get away with it, he might do it again. I don't want that to happen, and I don't think you do either."

"N-No…"

She sighed. "Ren loves you. I know he does, even if he left his brain in another room for that moment. Just apologize for when you hit him, and I think he might find his own way of apologizing to you."

"…What if it continues?"

She froze. "Why are you even thinking about that?"

"Because I just don't know when this whole thing is going to be over; how much longer he and I are going to disagree about it. I just…want to be prepared. I want to know what my options are."

Inside, Rong felt sick. This wasn't the Pin-Mei she knew. She wouldn't be giving up so easily. She'd be asking how to reconcile with her husband so they could move on and put the ordeal behind them. Her fist clenched. She couldn't stop the anger that was steadily rising within her.

"Rong?"

"Do it yourself."

"W-What?"

The fist clenched tighter. "You heard me. I'm not helping a weak person like you give up so easily on a man I had to spend ten years hearing about! Ren this, Ren that – you never stopped! If you love him so much, go apologize to him, and if he really loves you, he'll forgive you!"

"It's not that easy…"

"Oh really? Well sorry then, but I guess my advice isn't worth shit to you right now. Go look up the divorce laws for China yourself if you're so pathetic that you're going to let one argument ruin twenty-three years of happiness between you two! Didn't you hit him first? That means you're just as guilty! He could be plotting to divorce you as we speak – it wouldn't surprise me! Honestly, I'm so disgusted with you right now that I wish you hadn't called! Don't call me again about this unless you actually want some ideas on how to make up with him!"

"Rong wait I-"

"What is it?"

"I…I called because I wanted to ask if you or HoroHoro could come earlier, if even just a day or two…I mean…I think things will get better if you're here…"

"Oh, so I'm a pawn for you to set in order to make your marriage problems go away? After all I've done for you, you just see me as a tool, don't you?"

"No, Rong! I don't! I really-!"

"Save it. Just save it. We'll get there when we get there. Don't call me again until you have this divorce mentality completely wiped from your mind!"

She slammed the phone down, breathing heavily. She braced her hands against the counter in the center of the kitchen as she stared at the floor on the other side.

"Rong…"

She jerked around to see her husband standing there, an almost scared look on his face. Her gaze fell back to the counter, not wanting to look him in the eye.

"Rong, what was all that about?" he asked.

She held her breath, somehow thinking it would calm her down. She finally exhaled.

"Pin-Mei's decided that after one physical argument with her beloved, the only solution is divorce. I bet you anything she hasn't even tried to apologize to him."

HoroHoro scratched his head. "Well, he _can_ be a tough person to approach…"

"Not when you've been married for more than fifteen years. She's so simple-minded sometimes. It just pisses me off!"

He tilted his head. "Was she upset?"

"Well, yeah. I'd be surprised if she wasn't."

"Sorry, but I'm having trouble understanding how you made the situation better by tearing her apart like that." He scratched his head. "I mean, she called you for help, right? Couldn't you have simply told her that it's too early to think about divorce, then tell her how to work things out with Ren?"

She looked up at him. "That was the first time I've ever really yelled at her…" she said listlessly. "Maybe I got angry because I knew that there isn't really anything I can do from over here. I'm still not completely over the fact that I'm not in charge of her well-being anymore."

"Does that mean you're going to bite off Xue's head soon, too?"

Her eyes widened. "What?"

"Within the next few years, Xue's going to be on her own. Are you going to do the same thing to her? Because if you are, we're going to have a major problem."

Rong looked down again. "I don't know why I did it…I just…"

"It's not too late to help her,"

Rong shut her eyes tight. "She probably won't answer the phone."

"Well, then what was it she wanted? Is there anything we can do on our end?"

"I…" She bit her thumb, then her eyes shot open. "Wait, can one of us go there now?"

"Eh?"

"If one of us just suddenly shows up, if we catch them mid-fight or something, we can sit them down and help them work it out!"

He grinned nervously. "Look, I know you want to help Pin-Mei and all, but I can't just drop my job at the last second. There are things that need to be done around the store. Plus, you're on guard duty at that night club, right?"

His wife's shoulders drooped. He was right. "Isn't there anything we can do?"

Before he could reply, the phone rang. Rong stared at it as it rang a second time, then slowly picked it up. "Hello?"

"HI MOMMY!"

She held the phone away from her, glancing at her husband.

"Xue?" he asked.

"Of course. Who else would scream into the phone like she does?" She put the phone to her ear again. "Why hello there, little girl. What are you up to?"

"Xue just got off the plane and is heading home soon!" She had been on a trip to Okinawa with her university's Culture Club.

"That's good to hear." Then it dawned on her. "Xue, when does the next plane for China leave?"

"Are? Um…in an hour or two says the big electronic board."

"Would you mind getting on the plane so you can go Uncle and Auntie's house?"

"Xue could, but why?"

"Auntie just called, and she said she can't wait to see you, she misses you so much! She wants to see you as soon as possible!"

"Really? OKAY XUE WILL GO!" her daughter cried happily.

Rong smiled. _That was easy._ "Okay, we'll wire you some money, so just get on the plane, okay? We'll be heading over there tomorrow night."

"Okies! Bye! Love you muchly!"

Rong hung up the phone, then leaned back with a sigh. "At least now Pin-Mei can busy herself paying attention to Xue. Knowing her, she brought back things from that trip for EVERYONE, so she'll want to give them out as soon as she gets there. That should break up the tension."

The father smiled. "Yeah. She has a big heart. I think it'll do them some good to have her around."

* * *

For a long time after her phone's off-hook signal began to sound, Pin-Mei held it to her ear, her eyes wide in astonishment.

_Rong's…never spoken to me like that before. Did just mentioning divorce cause her to act like that? Does it really make her sick? Do I…really disgust her?_

"Is Mistress aware that her phone is making that noise?"

Pin-Mei snapped awake and turned to look at Huan. Sheepish, she stood and quickly put the phone back in its cradle. She smiled nervously.

"I was just thinking, so I must have gotten lost in my thoughts and blocked it out. Thank you, Huan."

The maid tilted her head. "There are many things on Mistress's mind?"

The smile completely faded. She turned her head. "Yes, I suppose that would be correct."

"Is it because of the fight the Master and Mistress had recently?"

She froze. "You…You heard us?"

Huan nodded rather sadly. "Yes, Mistress. This person heard everything…and saw the end of it. This lowly servant apologizes for her rudeness. She should not have eavesdropped."

Pin-Mei shook her head. "No, it's fine. We _were_ a little loud, so I shouldn't be surprised that you heard us."

"Does Mistress…think she is at fault for her fight with Master?"

"I know that I hold at least half the blame," she replied slowly.

Huan shook her head. "Mistress should not let what Master said control her. She should make sure Master never treats her that way again."

"What do you mean?"

Huan clasped her hands together, almost in a pleading fashion. "Mistress should leave here and never come back. She should cut all ties to Master so she can be safe and never be hurt again."

Her mistress's eyes widened. "You think separation is the best option?"

The servant nodded earnestly. "Yes, Mistress's servant knows that Mistress is better off without Master's cruelty and infidelity."

Pin-Mei's heart stopped. "I-Infidelity…?"

"Yes, Mistress. Master is unfaithful to his wife. This humble servant regrets that she must be the one alert her Mistress of this, but she cannot stand to see her suffer anymore." Pin-Mei just kept staring, silent as stone. "This one regrets even more that she is the cause of Master's infidelity." Her mistress snapped her head up at her. "During this ordeal, every night that Master is not in his bed with Mistress, he breaks into the room of this lowly maid and uses her for his own needs. This one has tried again and again to escape him, to tell him that he should be with Mistress, the one who truly loves him, but he does not hear. This one has also been told by Ojouchama's guard that she has been a target of Master's lust as well."

Pin-Mei fell to her knees, grabbing her head. No, it wasn't possible. Even if Ren was angry with her, he would never be unfaithful to her…would he? She looked up at Huan, who knelt down in front of her, stretching her arms out in offering. Not knowing what else to do, she fell into her, sobbing uncontrollably into her shoulder.

_In reality, I should hate her, shouldn't I? For taking Ren away…but from what she said, she was forced._

She felt the young woman's breasts against her sternum, the realization slowly dawning on her.

_My body isn't good enough for him anymore, is it? I'm not young anymore, and it shows. Huan and Sheng…They're only twenty. Their bodies haven't been wrecked by pregnancy and childbirth. They're new, fresh…unlike mine, which is old and used. If given the choice, any man would choose either one of theirs over mine._

"Mistress, please forgive this lowly, pathetic servant for allowing such a thing to happen to her," Huan whispered, tears in her eyes. "Mistress is beautiful. Master should sleep with her instead. This pathetic one doesn't understand why Master cannot see the same."

_I don't understand, either_. _If only I could ask him why…_

She sat up and wiped her eyes. "Huan, I thank you for telling me these things. But I can't leave until I've asked him why he chose to do this."

"But Mistress!"

She shook her head. "It's something I have to do."

She stood and began walking up the stairs to the room she and Ren shared. After looking in the mirror and seeing her makeup running down her face, she washed up and put on her facial cream. She examined her face in the mirror, satisfied when she only saw a few wrinkles.

As she opened her side of the closet, she pulled out a set of her nicer robes and put them on. After standing in the middle of the room for a few minutes, she went and sat on the large silk-sheeted bed.

_Once I figure out what to say, I'm going to go find him and confront him about this. Rong's right. After all we've been through, I can't give up so easily._

She looked out the window. It was night already. Hours had flown by when she was in that same room crying that morning. It was most likely time for dinner, but she didn't feel like eating. In fact, she felt that the dinner table probably wouldn't have more than two people at it for a long time.

* * *

Lien moved a few stones and slipped into the dungeon hall. Quietly, she crept to her brother's prison and pulled a pin from her hair, artfully jiggling it around in the lock until it finally opened. She slowly opened the door, and, not finding her father inside, went in and shut it behind her.

"Mei-Mei?"

Lien looked up to see her brother once again chained to the dragon chair. He was obviously surprised to see her there, considering the precautions their father had taken to make sure only he could get in.

"How did you get here? Why?"

Lien smiled and ran up to him, vaulting the chair and straddling it. "Huan showed me a stone that was loose outside, so I could crawl through a hole to reach here. She was so helpful!"

He tried to smile, but failed. "Why are you here, though? Father will be angry if he sees you!"

"I just came to tell you something," Lien said. She leaned closer to him. "I'm going away."

"What? Where?"

"It's a secret," she replied, putting a finger to her lips. "It was Huan's idea. She said that if I do this, then Father won't be able to torture you anymore! We can be together!"

"Together? What do you mean by that?"

"It has to do with the old legend about Fu Xi and Nu Wa. They were just like us!" Lien cried as she clapped her hands together. "They loved each other, but since they were brother and sister, their love was forbidden. But they went to the top of a mountain and prayed for the blessing of the gods. 'If you will allow us to marry, have mist surround us,' they said. Well, guess what? It did! If we do the same, then I'm sure we'll get the same blessing!"

"Wait, what? I don't understand why we would want that. I mean, you're my sister and-"

He was cut off as Lien threw her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. His restraints prevented him from moving or pushing her away, so he sat and received it. He didn't close his eyes, nor did he find the ability to return the kiss. For each second it went on, he felt as if a hole in his heart was getting wider and wider. Her face was red as she pulled away. She smiled.

"I promise you, I won't fail!" she declared.

"L-Lien…I…"

"I have to go, but I promise that I'll come back with good news! I absolutely promise!"

She turned and ran from the room. As she passed the weapons that lined the walls of the corridor, she stopped and examined them. After studying them for a few moments, she picked up a smaller one, surprised at how the weight brought her hand down. Still, she considered it the only weapon that she would have any idea how to use.

"Just in case," she said quietly. "I have to make sure I get this done. I can't let anything stop me."

She ran to the basement door, since she wouldn't be able to climb the vents, and used the weapon she chose to dispose of the door knob. Cautiously, she looked around to make sure that no one was watching, then began running toward the main hall. As she neared it, she saw Huan looking at the staircase to the second floor, seemingly in thought.

"Huan!" she called to her. The maid turned around and bowed to her.

"Is Ojouchama ready?"

Lien nodded. "Yeah," she said, attaching the weapon to her side.

Huan frowned. "Ojouchama did not take Houraiken?"

Lien looked at her, slightly confused. "No, of course not. That's Papa's sword, plus he's been carrying it with him lately, so even if I wanted it, I probably wouldn't be able to get it from him."

"This person understands…" Huan said quietly, tightening her fists on her apron. "Anyway, it is time for Ojouchama to leave. Ojouchama must go pray for Heaven's blessing so she and Bocchama may be together."

Lien nodded, and they went to the stables to retrieve a horse. She mounted a black mare and looked down at Huan again. "This will work, right? Father will stop hurting Niisama if I pray hard enough?" she asked as they neared the gates that separated Tao Castle from the rest of the world.

Huan smiled and nodded. "This humble person is sure of it."

"Milady! What are you doing?"

They both looked back to see Sheng bolting toward them. Lien looked slightly frightened, the idea of being found out hadn't crossed her mind.

"Ojouchama, leave!" Huan urged.

Lien looked down at her, then at Sheng.

"Milady! You must stop! Master Ren has forbidden you to leave the estate!"

"I-I'm sorry!" she cried. She turned the horse and galloped off, not looking back.

"Wait!" Sheng cried, but was blocked by Huan. She jumped back as the maid produced a small chained sickle, a wide grin on her face. "What are you doing? How can you disobey Master Ren's orders like this?"

Huan threw her head back and laughed. "His orders mean nothing to me. I only do was Kaasan tells me to."

Sheng looked confused. "What are you talking about? Who's Kaasan?"

"Lien will meet her soon, and don't worry, she'll be taken care of. Kaasan is a very loving person." She laughed again.

Sheng grit her teeth and removed her bladed tonfas from their sheaths and put herself in a ready position. "I don't know what you're doing, or what your motives are, but I won't allow Lady Lien to be put in harm's way."

Huan smirked. "Such bold words, Sheng, but it doesn't change the fact that you're not even half the guard Pin-Mei's was. She never left her side, but I was able to prep Lien for this night without even meeting you once."

The Wei warrior gripped the tonfas' handles. "I **WILL** protect Lady Lien! Even if I'm not one fourth of the soldier Mistress Pin-Mei's was! AND I'LL START BY STRIKING YOU DOWN!"

She charged at her enemy with a cry. Her adversary swung back and threw the scythe at her. Sheng blocked it with the bladed side of her tonfa and continued charging. Huan smirked.

"Pay attention."

"What?"

She turned slightly as the sickle's trail bent and began returning to its wielder. The blade pierced her chest, and she paused. In one last desperate attempt, the swung her right tonfa out and tried to slash at her foe's chest. The Qiao just continued to smile.

It disappeared as she felt the sharpened steel edge cut into her. Sheng fell to the ground, her eyes blank as her blood started to wash the ground. Huan scowled at her in rage, kicking her victim on her side so she pull her weapon from the her chest. Without it there to block the hole, blood started pouring out of her.

Huan looked down at her in disgust. "Just lay there and die. I still have some business to attend to inside." She walked past her body and back into the castle.

* * *

Ren stared after Lien as she dashed through the door, carelessly leaving it open. He squeezed his eyes shut, still able to feel her lips against his. Part of him wondered if she had left lip gloss on him. He tried not to worry about something so trivial, but he licked his lips, just in case. Who knows what his father would do if he saw it. When he finished, he stared at the ground.

_What is this all about? Talking about us being together…Getting some sort of blessing…Forbidden love between siblings…_

His eyes widened.

_No…She doesn't…There's no way…Not with how cold that other me is…It's…Impossible…_

He clenched his fists.

_Why? Why are you going this far when I never even told you I felt the same?_

_**You're so weak.**_

_What?_

_**If I was in control, I could break these chains and go after her. But no, you're too worried about hurting your precious little wrists. Pansy.**_

_I am NOT a pansy!_

_**Fine, a wimp, then. Either way, I think it's undeniable that I'm the stronger one here. I don't want Lien to get hurt, just as you don't, so put me back in control – **__**now**_

_N-No! You'll never let me out again!_

_**Listen, I'm not about to lose Lien because you're too much of a coward to let me get things done.**_

_D-Don't!_

Suddenly, there was a blood-curdling scream. Ren looked at the doorway.

"Mu Qin?"

_**That's it. I'm not even giving you the option anymore. Consider yourself usurped.**_

_No! Stop it!_

He shut his eyes and shook his head, as if trying to fight his other self. Finally, he stilled, then opened his eyes.

"I'm much better off without a weak persona like you."

* * *

"What the hell…?"

Ren picked the broken lock up off the ground, studied it, then clenched his fist around it.

"Who the hell did this?" He stiffened, then scowled. "…Pin-Mei…"

He stomped down the stairs, and sure enough, there she was, slowly making her way to their son's prison. He grit his teeth and he started walking toward her.

"PIN-MEI!"

She froze and slowly turned, fear apparent in her eyes. She cowered as he came to stand in front of her.

"Ren, I…"

"What the hell is this about?" he asked sharply. He held up the broken lock. "The doorknob is busted as well." Silence. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

Her eyes misted. "Ren…Please…I…I don't want to fight right now. Please, just talk to me…"

"DID YOU DO THIS?"

"Y-Yes! Yes I did!" she cried, covering her head with her arms. Then she lowered them and looked at the ground. "Please, hit me if you feel I deserve it."

"What?"

She shifted her eyes at him. "You were right to hit me before…I was being unruly. I don't know what got into me. I'm sorry, Ren, please forgive me."

Ren was taken aback at the sudden change of heart. He had expected another battle, but she was acting so meek and timid that he couldn't possibly yell at her any further. He looked away from her. "It's fine." He saw her moving out of the corner of his eye and looked at her again. His eyes widened

"Ren, please, make love to me," she said as she slipped a shoulder out of her robe.

He just stared at her, unsure of what was going on. "You want to have sex _here?_ _I__n the dungeon_?"

"I'm sorry, but I can't tame my desire any longer," she said with sultry eyes. She moved him against the wall, causing him to almost trip over a large tub of water, and wrapped her arms around him. "I want another child, Ren. That will bring us together, won't it?" She unfastened a few knots of his black shirt and kissed his toned chest.

"I said…no more kids…" he breathed.

"Then just stay close to me…Don't let me leave your side…I love you, Darling. I'll do anything for you." She leaned up and kissed him deeply. "My beloved…"

Giving himself over to the situation, he pulled the other shoulder of her robe down and reached around to pull her hair tie out. His hand trailed down her side to unravel the sash of her robe as he kissed her neck.

He was stopped by a sudden deep pain in his stomach. He looked down to see a handsaw embedded in his midsection, blood already beginning to pour from it. His wife looked up at him, smiling.

"I love you, Darling," she said in a sweet voice, then drove the saw deeper into him, successfully pinning him to the wall.

Blood spilled from his mouth as he coughed, his vision blurring. Desperately, he took Houraiken from his belt, extended it, and swung at her. She dodged, then grabbed his hand and forced the sword into him. He couldn't hold in a yell of pain as his breathing staggered. He looked up at her.

"Pin-Mei...Wh…Why…?"

She smiled at him evilly and stroked his face.

"Because," she said. "Kaasan wills it."

* * *

_Okay, I'm going. I've done all I can to prepare. I'll just go, apologize, and hope that he and I can work things out._

She left the master bedroom and made her way downstairs.

_A peace offering would be a good idea._

She stopped in the kitchen to grab a bottle of milk from the refrigerator, then continued on her way. As she passed the basement, she noticed the door was open, something unusual seeing as Ren was careful not to let anyone in.

_Maybe he's down there…_

She picked up her skirt as she descended into the dungeon. "Ren?" she called. _Wait, maybe I shouldn't announce myself like that. I'll just look around._

A sinking feeling filled her. She touched her heart as she stared at the ground. "Everything will be alright. We love each other too much to give up. We've been through too much. Even if he wants a divorce, I'll do everything I can to change his mind...and still try to stay by his side," she whispered.

She resumed her mission, looking around as she went. A wall was off in the distance, facing her with only one small door near it. She squinted her eyes.

_Is that some sort of decoration?_

The sinking feeling got worse. She got closer to the wall, her eyes widening. Her pace quickened, and soon she was running, tripping and stumbling on her skirt along the way. She stopped short, dropping the bottle as her eyes widened. It hit the stone floor, shattering and sending glass and milk everywhere. Her movements disjointed, she slowly brought her hands to her face and grabbed the sides of it as she tried to make sense of what she was seeing.

Ren was pinned against the wall with both Houraiken and a handsaw impaling his stomach. Blood was falling down the front of him, as well as trailing down the wall. He wasn't moving. He wasn't crying out in pain. He was motionless.

Finally, she found enough breath let out one horrific scream. More soon followed, containing unintelligible words as she staggered and finally fell to her knees. It wouldn't have mattered if someone had been there to try to quell her cries. There was no doubt in her mind that he was dead, and she knew that there was no way to bring him back. She finally managed to pull herself up and clutched his body, the hilts of the blades inside him jabbing into her as she tried to embrace him.

"No…No…NO!" she screamed, her voice strained and hoarse. "This can't be real...This isn't happening...WHY? WHY DID IT END LIKE THIS?"

She looked up at his face. His eyes were open, but faded. Blood was still trailing from his mouth. His body was hunched over slightly, his arms dangling at his sides. Pin-Mei touched his face, hoping that he would close his eyes and lean into her as he would sometimes do. His eyes merely twitched.

This wasn't good enough. She needed to hear his voice. She needed him to move. She didn't even care at that point if he slapped her again. Just any sign that he was alive would do.

She continued howling and screaming. She didn't know if it actually was too late to do anything, but her mind couldn't wrap itself around that option.

"I LOVE YOU!" she screamed as she held him once more. "I wish the last time I touched you wasn't to hurt you! I'm so sorry, Ren! I'M SO SORRY! PLEASE, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, FORGIVE ME! FORGIVE SOMEONE AS STUPID AS I AM FOR LETTING MYSELF DO THAT!"

Her mind clouded and empty, she leaned up and tried to kiss him. The metallic taste of blood filled her mouth. She finally pulled away, burying her face in his chest.

"Why…" she continued to whisper. "Why…He never even knew how sorry I was…"

Her fingers suddenly dug into his back as her whole body tensed. She looked up over the still-warm shoulder, her eyes dark and burning with hatred.

"I'll find out who did this to you, and when I do, I'll kill them. No matter how much they beg me to stop, I won't. I'll give them the most painful and traumatic death possible. Their eyes will be just as open as yours are. I promise you, Ren. I'll kill them in the most inhumane way possible."

"That would be fun to watch."

Pin-Mei snapped her head around to stare at a mirror image of herself. Her eyes widened and she left her husband's body to step closer to the figure before her.

"What are you?" she whispered.

Her other self smirked. "Can't you tell just by looking? There aren't too many other things I could be except you."

Pin-Mei clenched her hands into fists. "Did…Did you…"

"If that's what you're asking, yes, that's my handiwork."

Her eyes widened for a moment, then she glared at her darkly. "You admit it?"

"I would be most upset if someone else tried to take all the credit, that is to say, after all the work and effort I put into my plan"

"WHY DID YOU DO IT?"

The clone laughed. "Because," she said. She turned to dust, revealing Huan behind her. The girl smirked.

"It's what Kaasan wants."

Pin-Mei stared at her in disbelief. "H-Huan? YOU did this?"

"Yes, I did. I'm quite happy with the results. Now that affair he's having will be over, right?" She laughed. "And yet, the damage may already be done..." she taunted as she placed her hand on her stomach.

As the cackling echoed through her ears, Pin-Mei looked back at the bloodied body of her husband. She looked at the ground in front of her, her head down, then took her robe off, leaving only an under dress with leggings.

"Oh, what's this? Is my Mistress going to have some revenge?"

She held her left hand, kissing her wedding ring. _Ren…_

Another fit of laughter. Pin-Mei glared at her darkly, her black eyes possessing both sadness and anger, and almost a sense of evil as well.

"You lying bitch..." she whispered. "I don't know how I believed you in the first place. Ren would never betray me like that, even if he was angry with me. I believe in him, and I trust him. He'd never do anything like that to me. The only thing I believe is..."

She took a sword from the nearby rack and charged at the maid.

"...you're jealous that he would never want a body as black and corrupt as yours!"

Not even attempting to dodge, Huan accepted the slash that landed across her chest, adding to the one left by Sheng. Again and again, she took all the blows Pin-Mei gave her, not complaining about the pain or worrying about her blood spilling onto the floor.

"Why don't you fight back?" her Mistress asked in a sharp voice.

"Because, I don't need to live. I've done what Kaasan wanted me to do. I'm no longer needed. Cut me to death. It means nothing to me."

Pin-Mei dropped her sword on the floor. She stomped over to her victim and grabbed her by the throat. Throwing her to the ground, she pressed her thumbs into her throat, strangling her.

"YOU KILLED MY HUSBAND!" she screamed. "THE ONLY PERSON I COULD EVER LOVE! NOT ONLY THAT, BUT YOU MADE SURE HE SUFFERED! I DON'T CARE IF I HAVE TO SELL MY SOUL TO DO IT, BUT I **WILL** KILL YOU AND MAKE SURE YOUR SUFFERING IS TEN TIMES AS WORSE AS HIS!"

Her victim's face was starting to turn slightly blue. She reluctantly let go.

"No…Not good enough," she whispered. She looked to the doors of the various torture chambers that lined the hall. "What should I do to you? Rip out your fingernails one by one? Twist your limbs around in a perfect circle until your body snaps? Behead you with 1000 cuts?"

Huan just continued smiling. "Mistress is too kind. She wants me to be comfortable when I die," she cackled.

Pin-Mei grabbed her by the throat, lifted her, then slammed her head on the ground again. The girl only continued to laugh. Frustrated, she looked around and saw a large tub of water on the far side of the room. Gripping Huan by the hair, she dragged her over to it.

"Huan, I seem to remember you once saying how much you feared drowning." She pulled her up to look her straight in the eye. "I wonder if that still holds true."

Huan's eyes had widened. She was actually afraid this time. Pin-Mei smirked. Without any hesitation, she grabbed the servant's hair again and forcefully dunked her head underwater.

The girl struggled, but Pin-Mei held her there, her eyes emotionless. The bubbles began disappearing, her arms flailing less. Finally, the body was still.

Pin-Mei let go of the head and watched it float of a moment. "I'd electrify you if I could," she murmured. She was about to stand up when her foot touched the sword she had used. She silently stared at it, then at Huan.

"_And yet, the damage may already be done..."_

Pin-Mei grabbed the corpse's head and threw her onto her back. Grabbing the sword, she held it over the stomach.

_Should I check to make sure she was lying? Does it even matter now? If there was a baby, it wouldn't survive with Huan dead like this. But still, this would tell me the truth once and for all_...

She raised the blade and and brought it down – straight into the demon's chest. After staring down at it, she sighed.

_I don't need to confirm anything, because she was lying in the first place. The person I married isn't so shallow that he would only love someone because of their body._

She looked up at Ren, and her eyes suddenly became softer. She ran to him, clutching him again.

"Ren..." she whispered. "I killed her. I killed the girl who did this to you. Y-You were right…If I had just kicked her out when you said to…"

There was a gurgling sound. She stepped back. Ren's mouth seemed to be trying to move, but dried blood had crusted his lips and more only continued to pour out. She stared at him, unable to believe the possibility that he was still alive.

"Ren?"

She could hardly hear her own voice as she stiffly walked up to him again and grasped his hand.

"Are you there? Can you hear me?" Saying such things…it made her feel as if she was walking around searching for him when he was right there in front of her. "Are you…alive?"

Nothing. She stared at the ground, clutching his right hand in both of hers. Her tears fell and ran off his knuckles as she brought it close to her face.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered again. "I'm so so sorry, Ren. I wish I could have at least told you how much I love you before now…I wish I had told you what I came down here to say."

_Maybe it's not too late. Even if he's gone, maybe he can still hear me._

She looked up at him and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry for what happened this morning," she began. "I…It was wrong of me to let our children see that side of us. You were right…It's not okay to let them witness something like that." She laughed weakly. "Now I realize why you led me out of the room. To spare them. You…You really wer-…You are a wonderful father." She stiffened, thinking of the boy locked up in that same basement. "Even though I disagree with how you're treating Ren, I should have found some other way to let you know. I…I shouldn't have hit you…The person you married would have never even thought of such a thing.

"But I'll ask you one last time: Please find it in your heart to spare him of any more pain. Have mercy on him. I…I'm still not convinced that he did it, but if he did, then please, let's find a different way to deal with this. I…I want my son back."

She sighed, looking down and stroking his hand.

"Even if we fight, even if you hit me again, I'll still love you. Ehehe…Some people would probably tell me to get out if you did that a lot, that it's an abusive relationship, but I'd stay regardless. I'd take it. I love you that much. E…Even if you did…**that** with Huan or Sheng, I'd still want to stay by your side…even if I became a mere concubine. It's so stupid to want that, I know. It's like in movies and television – the girl is too stupid to leave. Honestly, I can't help it. I can't break that stereotype. Not after all we've been through together…and how much you mean to me."

She intertwined their fingers as best she could and held them against her chest.

"I love you so much!" she cried. "I love you with all my heart and soul! With every fiber of my being! Everything I am! I'm incomplete without you! I won't let us fall apart this easily! I love you! I'd do anything for you! I'd switch places with you if I could! I'd-!"

She nearly choked on her own breath. Her eyes drifted to their hands. She could feel a slight pressure being exerted on hers, clutching it. But it suddenly released, the hand becoming limp again. Her eyes widened, and she looked up at him.

"R-Ren?" She stepped closer to look at his face, then gasped.

A single tear was making its way down his right cheek, but she hadn't been close enough for it to be her own. There was only one possible explanation. She loosened her grip on his hand slightly.

_It's the most clichéd thing ever, but…_

"Ren…If you're alive…if you can hear me, squeeze my hand again."

She smiled when he responded and squeezed her again, happy tears falling down her own cheeks. She nuzzled it for a moment, then started to gently release it.

"I'm sorry…I've been wasting all this time. I…I thought you were dead!" She wiped her tears away, then gripped Houraiken's hilt. "Don't worry, I'll save you. I won't let you die! I promise!"

But when she pulled it out, she found that the sword had sheathed itself. She stared at it for a moment, perplexed, then threw it behind her and pulled the saw from her husband's torso. With nothing to hold it up, his body started falling to the ground, but was pulled up before he could hit the floor.

Pin-Mei looked up to see her son supporting his father, his wrists still in chains, albeit broken. "Houraiken sheaths itself when held by someone without Tao blood. Unfortunately, Mu Qin, you're included in that."

She blinked at him. "Ren…? How did you get out?"

He didn't look at her. "Hearing you scream made me remember who I was. Chains are powerless against me…" He mumbled something. _...especially when you're involved._

"What?"

"Nothing." He looked at his father. "What's going on?"

"I don't have time to explain," she said quickly. "Put on him on the ground. If we waste any more time, it may be too late."

Ren silently laid him flat on the ground and his mother quickly covered his wounds with her hands. "This isn't like last time, Ren," she said. "I've been working on my healing this time, I'll be able to do it for a lot longer, so I know I can do this!" She closed her eyes as she concentrated.

He watched for a moment, then fidgeted a little. "Is there anything I can do?"

Pin-Mei opened her eyes, her gaze not leaving her patient's body. "Ren…I know your father's been cruel to you this past week, but I do have something to ask of you."

"What is it?"

"Please go to the medical wing and get me some blood, type AB. As you can probably tell, he's lost a massive amount of his. Even if I heal his wounds, if we don't get some blood into him fast, it may not matter."

Ren looked at his father's body again, then stood up. "I'll be right back." He started running off.

"Ren,"

He stopped and looked back at her. She was smiling.

"Thank you. You're a wonderful son."

He slowly turned and ran down the hall again, not saying a word. Pin-Mei's smile faded as she turned back to her husband.

"See that, Ren? Your son still loves you very much, despite all that's happened. We're very fortunate to have him. I don't want to argue, but…this is one of the reasons why I can't possibly believe that he did it. It's the same reason why I find it hard to believe that you would want anyone's body other than mine." She shook her head quickly, her face a little red. "I mean, it's just…You never seemed displeased with me."

She was silent for a minute or two, then breathed. "Ren, I…I have a favor to ask. It's an incredibly selfish one, but I'm hoping you won't feel less of me for it." She drooped her head and removed one of her hands from the wound and weakly held one of his. "Will you…tell me I'm beautiful? I just…with all of this, I need to know that you still feel that way about me. That…I'm good enough in your eyes." She patted the hand and placed hers back on the partially healed stomach.

A few moments later, Ren came rushing down the hall with a stand and a bag of blood. He quickly put the stand on the ground, steadying it, then attached the bag to the intravenous line. After tying a tourniquet to his father's arm, he surveyed it.

"Do you know how to do it?" she asked him.

He nodded. "I read it in a book once. Plus, none of the nurses were anywhere to be found. It took me such a long time because I had to find everything myself." His eyes focused on the arm. "Okay, right here." He stuck the needle into the largest vein he could see, then quickly placed a compress bandage over it.

Pin-Mei sighed. "I feel so much better about this now." She glanced at her son, who was staring at the victim intently. "Ren…I've noticed that you…well, you're…"

"That I'm not a coward anymore?"

"Well…yes, but I was looking for a more polite word, like timid."

"Either way, I told you; I thought you were in trouble, so I found the strength to break then chains and come to your aid." He looked at Huan's corpse. "But it would seem as though you didn't need it."

His mother looked at the ground. "It's awful of me, but I feel no remorse for what I did to her, just as I know she showed none for what she did to Ren."

He smirked. "But now at least I don't have to listen to her talk. That was the most annoying speech pattern I've ever come across."

She laughed weakly. Then took her hands off her lover's body. "Okay, the wound's closed."

"Now, we wait," Ren said, trying to make himself comfortable.

Silence.

"…S…Someone…please…"

After they had propped Ren up against the wall in a sitting position, they glanced in the direction of the voice.

"It's…Milady…she's…"

"That sounds like Sheng," Pin-Mei whispered.

Her son darted down the hall and came back carrying the wounded soldier in his arms. Pin-Mei gasped as he laid her on the ground. She was gasping for breath. Her bracers and the armored flap of her halter top were opened, exposing the number of vials missing from them. It was obvious that she had tried her best to numb the pain until she could alert someone of what had transpired outside.

"Sheng! What happened?"

She slowly turned her head to look at her

"Mistress…Huan…she's…"

Pin-Mei nodded. "I know. She's been…taken care of. What happened? Was she the one who did this to you?"

Sheng nodded. "But…there's more to it…than that…Lady Lien…is gone…"

"What?" Ren said, folding his arms. "Explain yourself."

"Yes, Sheng, please. Do you know why she left or where she was going?"

"No…I don't…All I know is she's going to someone…named 'Kaasan'. She headed…toward the woods…"

Pin-Mei leaned closer earnestly. "Is that all? You don't know why?"

"No…forgive me…"

Ren bit his thumb. _Where could she have possibly…?_

"_Huan said that if I go to a mountain and pray hard enough, we can get Heaven's blessing!"_

He froze. "There's no way..."

"Ren? Do you know where she is?"

He nodded. "I think so."

"I-Is she safe?"

"I have no way of knowing that, unfortunately, which is why I'm going to find her." He removed a Kwan Dao from the rack and swung it, then began walking down the hall.

"W-Wait! I'll go with you!" Pin-Mei cried standing up.

"No. Stay here. You need to heal Sheng, as well as tell Father in on what's going on when he wakes up. I'll go on ahead. Tell him to go to the top of the tallest mountain."

"Alright, but why?"

"Because Lien is so foolish that, when she's desperate, she'll believe any fairytale she's told. Huan knew that and took advantage of it. Now we have to pick up the pieces and catch up to her before it's too late." He looked back at her. "Mother, I'll bring her back, I promise."

She nodded. "Alright, Ren. I'm counting on you."

He nodded back at her and sprinted to the stables. It was raining, and he could hear thunder rumbling in the clouds. He saddled his horse and began riding up the mountain. What scared him was that he had no idea how much of a head start his sister had, and there was no telling if she had even chosen the particular mountain he was heading for. His hands gripped the reins tightly as he urged his steed to go faster, despite the treacherous mud that covered their path.

_Dammit, Lien! You better not have gotten yourself killed over this!_

* * *

"Okay, girl, woah," Lien said as she tugged the reins, bringing her horse to a stop. She positioned her under a tree to shelter her from the rain, and tied the bridle to a branch. She patted her and attached a feeding bucket to her bridle before leaving. "I'll be back soon, okay?"

Lien stared at the flat peak she had arrived at. No trees or rocks were in its center, allowing her to decide just where she wanted to situate herself.

"There might as well be a neon sign that says 'PRAY HERE' with an arrow pointing down," she mumbled to herself.

She cautiously walked to the center of the clearing and looked at the ground.

_I really hope this works…_

But before she could even bring her hands together, a hand slapped her shoulder.

"Hey! Lien! You really did come!"

Her eyes widened as she looked back to see Tadashi standing behind her, a big smile on his face. He was wet, just as she was, but he didn't seem to mind.

"Tadashi? What are you doing here? How did you know I was coming?"

He smiled more. "Well, I told Kaasan about the person you love and she said she could help! So she went and told Huan about that old legend, and lo and behold, you came! Now you can be happy!"

She stared at him. "You…You knew…about…"

His smile weakened a little. "Yeah, I did. I could tell. But like I said, your happiness is most important to me. That's why I'm helping you. I just want the person I love most to be happy."

She looked away from him. "Thank you…"

He grabbed her hand. "Come on! Come meet Kaasan!"

"Um, o-okay!"

He guided her to a large umbrella and pulled her under it. "Kaasan, this is Lien, the one I told you about."

Lien bowed slightly. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Meihou." _She looks familiar...almost like I've seen her in one of Mama's photo albums before..._

A tall woman with dark gray hair, only a tone brighter than black, and elegant robes gave her a plastic smile. "Nice to meet you as well." Then she reached into her sleeve and pulled out a fan, then opened it and started waving it in an attempt to cool herself off. "It so humid up here."

She looked over the fan at her guest, then closed it as she leaned forward to look at her face more clearly. Lien blinked, slightly intimidated by the vibe she was receiving from the woman. Finally, Mrs. Meihou smiled at her before standing upright and resuming fanning herself.

Lien swallowed. "Is there something wrong?"

The woman cackled as she leaned over to whisper in her ear.

"You look just like your father."


	76. Hearts and Stars

I don't really have much to say right now since I have a cold and my mind is all fuzzy...other than "Sorry for the wait!"

**Notes: This chapter is named after the song "Hearts and Stars" by cage9, which I chose as a song for Tadashi.**

**There's fluff. I mean MARSHMALLOW levels of fluff. Extreme fluff. Did I mention this chapter has a large amount of Renmei fluff?**

**There's also some very brief ****lime**** here. Nothing major. The teens can stay.**

**I should have mentioned this before, but the time difference between Guiyang (capital of the Guizhou, China) and Sapporo (Capital of Hokkaido, Japan) is only one hour. It takes about eleven to twelve hours to fly between the two. Yes, I was pathetic enough to use Expedia for my own sick intentions.**

**This is the chapter where you're going to get a lot of questions, but not too many answers. Yet. I promise that everything will be explained.**

**I think it's worth mentioning that the exchange between Ren and Lien after he finds her was inspired by the scene with Makoto and Kotonoha of _School Days _at the end of episode eleven.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Six: Hearts and Stars**

* * *

Ren slowly opened his eyes. Plagued with double vision, he closed them and used his thumb and index finger to rub them a couple times before shaking his head and opening them again. The wall in front of him finally came into focus. He looked down to see Pin-Mei leaning against his chest, sleeping.

"That's the real one."

He glanced up at Sheng as she walked over to him, then back down again. "I know."

"She's just exhausted because she used up her furyoku healing the two of us. From what I hear, your wounds should have been fatal," she said looking over at the wall his body had once been pinned to. There was a large spot of blood where he had been impaled, then long trails where it had dripped to the floor.

"I remember hearing her voice," he said listlessly. "Her screaming, her crying, her trying to talk to me…I couldn't see anything though. At one point, I really thought I was going to die, but…" He trailed off.

"When you knew she was there, you didn't want to give up. You didn't want to leave her alone."

He gave no reaction. Instead, he took to looking around the room, his eyes finally resting on Huan's corpse.

"Sheng, did you…"

She shook her head and folded her arms. "No. It was Mistress Pin-Mei who killed her in such a brutal manner. She apparently cut her, choked her, and drowned her before finally driving that sword through her chest. I think it's safe to say that seeing you in a near-death state forced her gentle side to go on vacation for a while."

He nodded as he looked at the body. _Drowning…Some people think of it as the worst way to die. Is that why she chose it? And the way the sword is impaling her chest…These sorts of methods are so unlike her._

"Master Ren, I'm not going to request that you tell me the answer, but…Do you still love your wife as much as you did when you got married?"

He looked up at her. "What gives you the right to ask me something like that? I don't see how it's any business of yours."

They stared at each other. Finally, Sheng bowed.

"You're absolutely right, Master Ren. Please accept my deepest apologies."

"Good, now go get me some milk," he commanded, turning his head away from her. "And take your time. In fact, take a detour and just go for a walk."

She blinked, then nodded and slowly began to walk away from them. When she was out of sight, Ren looked down at Pin-Mei, noticing how her face had been sprinkled with blood. He tried to wipe it off with his hand, but it only succeeded in smearing it. He sighed.

"It's no use without a towel," he murmured.

He removed the tie from her hair and began lightly stroking it. There were some tangles in it, which could have been attributed to the fact that blood and sweat had touched it at some point during the fight, but he ignored them. The feeling wasn't important. The only thing that mattered was that he had the ability to touch her at all.

He heard her moan as she stirred in his arms. She looked up at him, her eyes wide.

"Ren…" she whispered.

"Morning," he replied in a flat voice.

She whimpered before throwing her arms around him. "Oh my gods…Thank goodness. For a minute I thought I might lose you again!"

He didn't move. "For a minute I thought you were trying to seduce me into having makeup sex."

"You…You're so mean…" she whispered, laughing as she cried into his shoulder. She stilled. "So..that's how Huan was able to get you?"

He nodded shamefully. "Yes...Yes it was. I really should have noticed that something wasn't right. She was a lot more forward than you usually are. I guess I was distracted by the fact that I was relieved that you didn't hate me."

She shook her head furiously. "N-No! I could never hate you! I love you!" Still, she stiffened, then looked away from him at the ground.

He tilted his head to try to meet her eyes. "What is it?"

His wife opened and closed her mouth a few times, as if she was going to say something, but couldn't get the words out. Her hands clenched the stained fabric under them.

"Tell me," he said in an exasperated tone.

Her shoulders shook as her hands clenched the under dress tighter.

"_Mistress is better off without Master's cruelty and infidelity_," she whispered.

Ren's heart stopped. "W...What?" He again tried to meet her eyes, but she turned her head away. She took a deep breath.

"_Every night that Master is not in his bed with Mistress, he breaks into the room of this lowly maid and uses her for his own needs_."

Ren shook his head, his eyes wide. "That...That's not true...

"_This one has tried again and again to escape him, to tell him that he should be with Mistress, the one who loves him, but he does not hear_."

"It's not true!"

"_This one has also been told by Ojouchama's guard that she has been a target of Master's lust as well_."

Ren grabbed Pin-Mei's shoulders and shook her. "Why are you even thinking about something like that? What have I done to make you think I would do that to you?"

She looked up at him, her eyes red and puffy. "We've been fighting lately, and we sleep on opposite sides of the bed. We're not intimate at all. I was trying so hard to believe in you, but there's still that part of me that dreads the worst case scenario – that I'm just not good enough for you anymore, that you need to go to someone with a younger body in order to feel satisfied."

He let go of her, his fists clenched. His body seemed to be shaking, trying to hold in all the emotions that were going through him at once. She just stared at him, trying to read his reaction – trying to see if what she said was true. Finally, he spoke.

"You…YOU IDIOT!" he yelled at her. He shoved her, sending her to the ground so he could lean over her. "Do you think one fight means our marriage is in trouble? Do you?"

"I…"

"Couples fight! It happens! We've just been able to get along with each other because we both know what's expected of us! The only thing we should worry about it _how_ we fight."

"How we fight?"

He took a deep breath. "That's right. We didn't go about it like we should have. We'll just have to learn from this so we can be better next time."

She looked away. "And my body?"

"What about it?"

Her face turned red. "Does it…um…still a-arouse you?" She covered her face with her hands as if she couldn't believe what she had just said.

Ren pulled her up and embraced her. She peeked through her hands at his hard yellow eyes, immediately closing them again to hide herself. He chuckled, shaking his head. "You're never going to change, are you?"

She quickly shook her head, causing him to smirk.

"As for your answer…" He looked away, still not used to expressing himself like this. He tried to find a way around it. "We fight sometimes, yes, but when it comes to how we view each other, we're in mutual agreement."

She looked up, confused. "What?"

He scratched his head as he tried to think of something to say. Finally, he sighed, knowing he would have to be blunt. "I enjoy having sex with you, alright?"

"Oh…" She tried to hide her face. "You didn't have to be so blunt."

He grinned irritably. _Thirty-seven and still an airhead._

"I…like your body too…"

"Thanks…" _This is stupid. We sound like a couple of virgins about to have sex._

She snapped her head up – red face and all – and looked him in the eye. "I-I'm sorry for-!"

He kissed her, cutting her off. As he ended it, he smirked at her. "I already heard your apology, remember? I hate redundancy."

She just hugged him again, her forehead against his shoulder. "Thank you."

She wasn't expecting a straight-out apology from him. It wasn't his style, and if she got an apology at all, it would be in some subtle way, but still enough so she would know. That's just the way Ren was, and it was what she was used to.

"Let's never fight again," she whispered. "Promise?"

He chuckled. "You sound like a child."

"Just promise!"

He sighed. "We can't just say that, and you know it. We're going to fight again at some point."

"I know…You're getting to be such a grumpy old man…" she mumbled.

"Did I hear you saying how young I look?"

"Yes, of course, darling."

They were silent as they sat holding each other.

"I love you," she whispered after a while.

He just squeezed her tightly, letting her know he felt the same. She closed her eyes and smiled. _It's okay, I know you don't usually say it that much, anyway._

"…I love you, too."

Her eyes flew open. She smiled and nuzzled his shoulder. "I love you too."

He scoffed at her. "You already said that, and I gave my response. It's time to drop the ball."

She giggled. "Okay. Ball dropped."

Sheng soon returned with the milk. "Milord, I think you should drink this soon. It might get warm because of the leisurely pace you wanted me to take."

Ren looked up at her, slightly annoyed at being interrupted. "Just leave it right there, I'll get to it later."

Silence. Sheng stared at Pin-Mei.

"Mistress, while I understand that you need some time to celebrate Master Ren's vitality, don't we have other important matters to worry about?" she said, trying to sound respectful.

Pin-Mei sprang up and looked back at the guard, her eyes wide. "Yes! Thank you Sheng!" She turned back to her husband. "Ren, we need to-,"

"What the hell are you wearing?"

Pin-Mei looked down at herself to see that she was still in her blood-covered under dress, her robes in a pile near her. Red-faced, she tried to cover herself up.

"I-I-I was…You see…This is…"

He smirked at her again. "Why are you getting so flustered? It's nothing I haven't seen before." He laughed as she lowered her arms. Sheng came and draped the now filthy robes over her shoulders. She looked up at him slowly.

"Ren, Lien's gone."

His amused grin faded, his eyes widened. "What do you mean, 'gone'?"

She fidgeted. "Well, I…I don't know much about it…er…Sheng, if you would…"

The guard nodded. "Of course, Mistress." She turned to Ren. "Huan must have said something to seduce Milady into running away. I came upon them when they were about to leave, and that's when I learned of Huan's betrayal. Something must be going on, since she didn't hesitate at all to draw her weapon and fight me." She sighed, looking at the ground as she remembered her swift and pathetic defeat at the hands of the traitor. "Anyway, Bocchama seems to know where she is, for whatever reason. He's gone to find her, and advised us as to where to meet up with him."

Ren put his hand up. "Wait. Did I just hear you say that my son, who's chained up down the hall, _left_?"

Sheng nodded hesitantly. "Yes…He was the one who carried me here, so I'm sure it was him."

Pin-Mei nervously put her hand on his arm. "I-I told you that he was gone, remember? When you were, um, sleeping? He…He absolutely positively ran up to the medical wing as fast as he could when I asked him to get some blood for you. He's part of the reason why you're still alive, Ren."

He shook his head. "I can't believe he got out…"

She giggled. "Breaking chains must be in his blood," she said, thinking of times when her husband had done the same. Her smile faded. "But I suppose that now isn't the time to be joking around."

Ren nodded. "Alright, I'm going after the twins," he said stoically. He reached to his belt to take out Houraiken, but found nothing. He blinked, then patted his pants. The two women watched him run around the room looking for it. Not finding it, he looked back at them suspiciously. "Where the hell is Houraiken?"

Neither of them knew what to say. They were just as shocked as he was.

"Um, Darling, are you sure you brought it down here? Maybe you left it in our room…"

"NO!" he shouted, causing her to jump. "You pulled it out of me, remember? I doubt it got up and just walked to our room." He stroked his chin with his right hand, using his left fist to support his elbow. "Someone must have taken it." Their eyes met.

"Ren must have…"

He sighed. "That idiot. He barely knows how to use it. What made him think it was a good idea to take it from me?"

She mimicked his stance. "But Ren, I don't remember any of the Shaman Fight videos giving any evidence of En teaching you how to use it."

He froze. "I'm different. I'm more independent than he is, so I'm perfectly capable of teaching myself." She was grinning at him. "ANYWAY, we need to catch up to him as soon as possible. We have no idea what sort of danger he and Lien could be in."

Ren sighed and removed a large Kwan Dao from the rack. After examining it, then swinging it, he handed it to Pin-Mei, who stumbled under its weight. He grabbed a few more before he found one suitable enough.

"Why not this one?"

He looked down to see Pin-Mei holding out the Kwan Dao she herself had decorated with stickers so long ago. Their faces were faded on many of them, brought on by use and the conditions of the dungeon itself. Tongue in cheek, he turned around to hide a smirk.

"I'll get laughed at if I use that."

"What? B-But last time you…"

"Besides, you don't want the stickers to fade even more, do you? It's raining out, and that will just ruin them. Put it back." He glanced over his shoulder at her. "I'll use it the next time I practice my forms."

She blinked, then smiled. "Alright."

Without so much as a smile, he turned around again. "I'm going." She watched him begin making his way down the hall.

"No, wait! Let me go with you! I'll help!"

"No. Stay here. We both know that your furyoku is nowhere near being restored, so your healing arts are unusable at this point. Just stay here and rest. If your furyoku is restored, and we're not back yet, feel free to come join us. Until then, remain here."

She wrung her hands, staring at the floor. Finally, she nodded. "I'll do as you say."

He nodded. "I'll be back soon."

"Wait!"

"What is it now?"

Pin-Mei looked at the ground to her left. "At least…At least change your clothes. Those ones are stained with blood, and since it's hardened now, it will make you feel uncomfortable."

He looked down at his shirt and saw that the gold clasps were stained red; two had been severed by the swords that had impaled him. In any case, she was right. He was covered in blood, and would probably feel more refreshed after washing a little.

"Alright, you win. But we can't dawdle like this. We don't know what sort of danger Lien could be in."

But as they climbed the stairs one of the servants came rushing down to them, out of breath.

"Milord, Bocchama has disappeared!"

He nodded. "Yes, Pin-Mei sent him out to look for for Lien."

The servant stopped. "Milady sent Níu-chama out into the storm?"

Pin-Mei gasped and pushed the servant out of the way, running upstairs to her youngest son's room. She threw the door open and ran in, ripping the sheets from the boy's bed. Finding nothing, she opened the closet. He wasn't there.

"Níu-Năi, honey! Mama wants you to come out now! We have to get you ready for bed! It's time to sleep, not to play!"

She was shaking when Ren found her. She looked back at him, her eyes wide. "He...He's not here...Wh...WHAT IF HUAN GOT HIM?"

"Then we'll keep looking until we find a body. If we find one, we'll decide what to do when the time comes," he replied finally. He didn't like that possibility, but he needed to be blunt at this point.

She ran over to him and wrapped her arms around him. "I...I just want my children back..." she whispered.

"I know...But for now, go clean yourself up and rest. I'll go shower and then go join Ren. I'm confident that I'll meet Níu-Năi along the way." He turned her around and gently pushed her toward the bathroom. "Now go on, I'll bring them back. I promise."

She looked back at him with a weak smile, her exhaustion apparent. Her hand reached back, her small fingers curling around the index and middle fingers of his left hand, but he insisted by giving her another tap, nudging her into the lavatory. As he went to close the door, she glanced back at him once more, causing him to stop.

"Just hold me one more time...before you go..."

* * *

As he brought the covers up over her shoulders, Ren gently placed his hand on Pin-Mei's head before leaving.

"Come back soon..." she mumbled, half asleep.

He didn't reply as his hand left her and he backed out of the room, shutting the door. When he was out of the way, Li stepped in front of it.

"Make sure nothing happens to her. I'm counting on you," he said.

"Yes, Milord."

He began making his way downstairs. As he motioned to go toward the stables, there was a knock at the door. He looked at the clock. It was a little before nine.

_Who could it be at this hour? If Ren's come back with Lien, he wouldn't knock…_

He opened the door to see a tall girl with grey braids standing on the steps, a pile of books and papers in her arms. She looked around them at the man before her.

"Captain," she grunted, wavering under the weight of the books. "I don't know what you and your sister have been doing to make yourselves miss a week of school, but I brought your work so you can try to catch up."

Ren watched her stumble around until her legs buckled under the load. He grabbed the stack as she collapsed into the mud. Ai-Li rubbed her rear and stood up, moaning.

"That's just like you! You like watching people suffer, don't you?" she cried.

"It must be a family trait," he replied flatly.

She froze at his voice, which was a little deeper than what she was used to. Quickly, she produced a flashlight held it vertically between them, allowing her to see his face.

There was a long pause. They stared at each other.

"You're not in high school, are you?" she finally asked.

"No. I finished that a long time ago."

"I see…"

More silence.

"Unless you plan on telling a ghost story, shut that light off. It's irritating."

"Ah, yes, sorry." It was dark again. She kicked at the ground, unsure of what she should do next.

"I don't have time for this. Get inside."

"Bwuh?"

"It isn't a good idea for a human to be outside at a time like this, especially not with what's going on."

"Wait, what are you talking about? _What's_ going on?"

Ren didn't answer as he grabbed her arm and yanked her into the manor. He walked over and set the bundle of schoolwork on a table, making two piles since they had been previously sorted. Then he turned to the bewildered visitor.

"You won't understand at this point, but it's too dangerous for an ordinary human to be out at this time. I have a hunch, and if it's correct, then you could have gotten yourself killed." She was just staring at him. "Therefore, you will stay here until I come back with Ren and Lien. If you need to call your family to tell them you probably won't be home tonight, then there's a phone down the hall." He pointed to the right and she nodded dumbly. "Alright. So long, and don't leave, understand?"

She nodded again, then looked worried. "But there was a young boy out there!" She cried.

"What?"

"It was dark, so I couldn't get a very good look at him, but he couldn't have been older than ten…"

Ren's fist clenched. "Did you see any distinctive features?"

Ai-Li thought for a moment. "Um...Oh! He had a ponytail! Yeah, I remember now! A ponytail!" He stared at her with wide eyes. She shrunk. "Is that bad?"

"You just gave me another reason to get out of here. Stay put, you understand?"

"Y-Yes sir!"

Without another word, he bolted out the front door, slamming it as he headed for the stables. He tried to wrap his head around his young son's way of thinking, but he couldn't understand it at all.

_Why did he go out? How could he have even known before Pin-Mei and I did? It makes no sense!_

Ren went up to his horse and quickly began fitting the bridle. He felt his foot move against something that seemed to be glass, and he bent down to pick it up. It was a small vial. It was empty and the label was faded, telling him that it had been out here for a while. He looked at the label.

_This looks like it's from the Poison Hall, judging by what I can see…I just don't know which one it is…_

He took the cap off and very cautiously sniffed the bottle. His eyes widened and he jerked away from it, grabbing his nose and taking a few deep breaths. Once the minor effects had subsided, he put the cap back on and stared at the vial. He clenched it.

"I've been had," he whispered darkly.

* * *

"Lien! Where are you?" Ren called, his hands funneling his mouth. "Lien!" When there was no answer, he slowly lowered them and started riding again. _I was hoping she hadn't gotten to the top of the mountain yet…but…_

His sister's face flashed in his mind again and again. He clenched the reins. He knew he had to find her. If he didn't, the next time he saw his twin, she could possibly be horribly sick due to the weather – or dead.

_No! Don't think about that! _he yelled at himself. _Lien is stronger than that! She'll be alive when I find her – she will!_

He continued riding through the forest leading up the mountain, eventually coming to the top. His eyes widened as he spied Lien's horse tied to a tree.

"She…She's here…"

He jumped off his own horse, quickly tying the reins to an opposite tree, and tried to look at the ground. Although faint, he could make out some footprints in the mud. _Lien…_ He sprinted along the path she had unknowingly left him and arrived at a clearing.

There she was.

On her knees with her hands clasped and her eyes shut was Lien. He could see that her mouth was moving, telling him that she had been serious about her mission of prayer.

"Lien!" he cried as he began running over to her. He stopped as someone stood in his way. His eyes widened. "Tadashi…what are you doing here?"

"I can't let you disturb Lien," he said softly. "She's doing this because she believes that she can be with you if her prayers are answered."

"She said that, but I don't understand why she would want that at all!"

The boy's shoulders seemed to be shaking. He clenched his fists.

"LIEN LOVES YOU!" he screamed. "She…She's doing this because she loves you – because you're the one she wants to be with!"

Ren looked past him at Lien, whose hands were still clasped together earnestly. "She…loves…" He shook his head quickly. "I'm only a brother to her – nothing more! She knows that! She'd never have such thoughts!"

Tadashi stared at the ground. "I knew this would happen…I knew it…I tried to distract her so she wouldn't have to go through with this, but her feelings didn't fade at all! On that date, I finally realized that she wasn't going to return my feelings, so I set her free…" Blood dripped from his fists. "But you don't even love her back, you ungrateful bastard!"

Ren took a step back. Although he would never admit it even to himself, he was confused. He didn't know what was going on. He didn't know what to do. Beside himself, he fell to his knees, his palms on the ground.

"Why…Why does she have those feelings? She knows it's taboo…that Father would never allow it. She must know that a brother and sister can't have a family…It'd be like giving any children they had a guaranteed life of hardship and sickness! She…She knows I'm incapable of loving someone like that…S-She heard me when I said that, right?" he whispered, looking up at his classmate, hoping that he would agree with him that Lien's feelings were inappropriate, but Tadashi just stared down at him.

He looked at the muddy ground again. He stood up, his stance shaky. "I…I need to talk to her…I need to get her to stop this…"

Tadashi stood in his way. "I can't let you do that. I'm willing to give up on her so she can be with the person she really loves. I won't let you hurt her by rejecting her."

"You…plan on forcing me to be with her?"

"If that's what it takes for Lien to be happy."

Ren stared at the ground. "This…This can't be real…" He looked up at Lien. "I…I can't let this go on!" He shoved Tadashi out of the way, sending him into the mud, and ran up to his sister. He grabbed her shoulders and shook her.

"Lien! LIEN!"

That's when he saw her eyes. They were faded and lifeless. He shook her again and she slowly, almost hauntingly, looked at him.

"Oh, Niisama…good, you're here…It makes me so happy that you cared enough to come find me…" Her voice was light and breathless. She sounded weak and disturbed.

"Lien, you have to stop this! This whole thing is insane! Come on, we're going home."

She shook her head. "Not until I get the blessing," she whispered.

"No blessing is coming, Lien. There's no point in praying out in the rain like this. Mother's worried, so let's go." He grabbed her hand and pulled her up. He began walking, but she didn't move.

"But…I love Niisama…"

He froze. "I love you too…You're my sister and I'll always love you as one."

"I…really love Niisama. Niisama is the most important person in the world to me."

He tentatively looked over his shoulder at her. His sister's words terrified him, putting him in a position that could potentially ruin their sibling relationship forever.

"I want to be by Niisama's side until I die. I want to support him and make sure he's never lonely."

"You can do those things as my sister!"

"I want to sleep beside Niisama every night…"

He turned around and grabbed her shoulders, shaking her. "Stop it…"

"I want to do everything with Niisama…"

"Be quiet! Don't say anymore!"

"I want to give every part of myself to Niisama…I want to be useful to Niisama…"

"That's enough!"

"I'll be a wife Niisama is proud to have…"

"JUST STOP IT!"

"I'll love Niisama just like Mama loves Papa…"

His eyes were burning. "Can't you hear what I'm saying?"

"Niisama is the only person I'll ever love…"

"I…can't take this…"

"Niisama is the only person who will make me happy…My life means nothing without Niisama…"

He let go of her and hung his head.

"Lien…we can't be together. It's forbidden…people would only see our union as disgusting and disgraceful. Any children we had would be more likely to die at a young age because of all the diseases they could get. You could get sick as well."

She wasn't even looking at him; she was just staring at whatever was directly in front of her.

"None of that matters to me. We don't have to listen to anyone who condemns us, and we could always just adopt instead…"

"No adopted child could be an heir to our family. Father would never allow it."

"But Niu-Nai will have a family of his own, won't he? One of them can be the heir."

"S-Stop making excuses!"

"I don't care about anything else. As long as Niisama is happy, that's all that matters to me."

He looked up slowly. "Do you mean that?"

"Of course. Niisama's happiness is the more important than anything else."

He walked over and took her hand, then placed it on his left cheek, her thumb just under his eye. Lien twitched as she heard a soft choke.

"Niisama…Are you…crying?" She could feel his whole body shaking. "W-Why are you crying? I thought I would be able to make you happy!"

He shook his head. "You can't Lien, not like this."

"T-Then we'll get married! I can make you happy like that, can't I? I'll be everything you need!"

"Lien, I'm happy enough to have you as a sister. I don't need you to be my wife in order to feel happier. So just…Stop this…"

Her eyes widened in horror. "Nii…sama…doesn't…love me?"

He didn't want to start this now. "You can ask me when we get home. We're not doing this out here."

"A-Am I really…the reason why Niisama's crying?"

He was silent, not knowing if he should be truthful or not.

"Yes, I'm crying because of you."

She shook her head as she ripped her hand from his face and held it, staring at the ground.

"N-No…I never meant to hurt Niisama…I just want to make Niisama happy! But…I hurt you instead…"

"Lien…"

He could hear her crying, and he looked away. Part of him didn't want to go home. He didn't want to have to tell her that her feelings had no chance of being returned.

"Ren…I…I'm so sorry…"

He looked at her again. She was looking up at him, her hands clasped together in a pleading fashion.

"I'm so sorry, Ren," she whispered. "Please don't cry anymore…"

His eyes widened as he realized that he could once again see the light in her eyes. She didn't seem brainwashed anymore. She finally understood him.

"As long as you address me the way you're supposed to, I won't," he said, a small smirk on his face.

She nodded and fell into him, throwing her arms around him. "Please don't hate me!" she cried.

He returned the embrace. "You fool. I couldn't hate you even if I wanted to."

"Niisama…"

Tadashi stepped forward. "Lien, why are you throwing away all the effort I put into this? I did this so you could be happy!"

Lien looked at him sadly. "I'm sorry, Tadashi...I really do appreciate what you were trying to do, despite your feelings, but…" She looked at Ren. "Niisama doesn't think that now is a good time to discuss it. We'll go home and deal with this there." She saw his fist clench as he lowered his head, and she went over to place her hand on his shoulder. "Please don't think badly of me. You do so much for me, and I wish there was something I can do for you, I really do."

"But there isn't a single thing you could do for me."

"Tadashi…"

He backed away from her, then finally looked up again, tears in his eyes. "Because I just want to be with you…I want to make you happy, and I can't have the chance to do either of those. My plan failed. All of this was for nothing…but it's alright." He put on the most pathetic smile the twins had ever seen. "I don't harbor any ill feelings toward either of you. I just hope that, in the end, Lien is happy."

Lien looked at the ground sadly. "I'm sorry…"

He looked at Ren. "You win. I give up."

Ren shifted uncomfortably. He didn't feel like anyone was winning in this situation.

"Tada-Darling, why are you giving up so easily?"

Tadashi looked back at his mother, whose outline could faintly be seen from under the large umbrella. "There's nothing else I can do, Kaasan." His shoulders drooped as he looked at the ground. "I…I'm sorry that I couldn't make your plan work."

"Nonsense. We just need to go about it a different way…"

She walked out from under her shelter, a smaller umbrella shielding her from the light rain.

Ren's eyes widened. "Th-There's no way…That can't be…"

Lien looked back at him. "What's wrong, Niisama?" He suddenly yanked her arm and pulled her behind him.

"This is impossible…How can she be here?"

"Who?"

"Tada-Darling, come here. I'll tell you how to make all of this work."

He blinked. "Alright…How?"

She smiled. "Exactly. Hao-Sama promised us all happiness in his new world, and we're going to start creating that world right now."

His face was still blank. "Hao…Sama…? Kaasan, who are you talking about?"

She tapped her closed fan on her chin in thought. "It seems as though coming to this world has made you forget why you were even sent here in the first place."

Ren's eyes narrowed. "So you ARE here to hurt us…I should have known."

Lien looked at them both frantically. "Wh-What's going on?"

Tadashi looked at them, horrified at Ren's accusation. "N-No! I'd never want to hurt either of you!" He turned to face his mother. "Kaasan, I don't understand any of this! What am I supposed to be remembering? What to you mean 'sent here'?"

She held his chin, an evil smile on her face. "Just hold this," she said as she gave him a large tag with bold characters written on it.

He looked at it, still confused. "…'Star'? What's this for?"

"A symbol of the loyalty you pledged to Hao-Sama in exchange for your life."

The tag glowed, and a blinding light emitted from it. It jumped from his hand and onto his forehead as the wind picked up. Lien wrapped her arms around her brother's midsection for stability, surprised when he placed his hands on top of hers.

"Just hold on, and don't let go," he commanded. "I won't let anything bad happen to you, alright?"

_Niisama…_ She nodded. "Okay!"

Ren turned his attention back to their classmate. Tadashi had grabbed his head and his stance had wavered. He looked like he could collapse at any moment. The boy shook his head frantically.

"No...Stop it…STOP IT! I DON'T WANT TO REMEMBER!" he screamed.

His "mother" stood near him, laughing behind a fan. "You'll be thankful when you're yourself again. There was something you wanted – no - you NEEDED to do. That's why Hao-Sama chose you to come with me, along with Huan, so we could set the plot in motion.

"Now, REMEMBER! Remember and help me get rid of this disgusting pair of lovers!"

"N-No! I'd never hurt Lien! Never!"

"Maybe...but another girl has hurt you like she has...She's the one you wanted to hurt – to kill."

His eyes shot open as his mind raced with scenes of him with another girl. His eyes became wider as her voice filled his ears.

"_I'm applying to Tokyo Universiity. The teachers said I have a good chance of getting in if I study hard enough. Where are you going?"_

"_I…had fun today, I really did. Thank you, Tadashi."_

"_You're too good to me...It's like it's impossible for me to stay sad when you're around."_

"_Please don't cry…I'm here…"_

"_I love you. Believe me, I really and truly do. I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't."_

Her kind words seemed to put him at ease for a moment, but then the photoplay took a turn for the worst. She stopped looking him in the eye. She was with someone else. Her voice wasn't happy or full of passion anymore.

"_Let's forget about that night, okay? It...was a mistake. I...I can't do something like that again until I can deal with the consequences. I'm sorry."_

"_Tadashi…What's gotten into you? Leave him alone!"_

"_He's just a friend! I wouldn't lie to you! O-Our parents are friends, so we are too!"_

"_I think...that we need to be apart for a while until I can work this out…I can't see you for a while, I'm sorry."_

"_Tell you I love you? At a time like THIS?"_

"She…She betrayed me…" he whispered. "She left me all alone after my father died. She used me and left me for that other guy…I did everything for her...and she LEFT me...She wouldn't even tell me she loved me before I left!"

"Who is he talking about, Niisama?" Lien whispered fearfully, still clinging to him.

"I don't know...I don't understand any of this..."

He looked to Tadashi again as the boy slowly straightened. His right hand was covering his face. When he removed it, his eyes were blood red.

"Thank you, Kaasan, for reminding me of why I came here."

"We both came for revenge, Tada-Darling. Don't worry, we'll both get our chances."

He smirked. "You're sure that **she** is coming, right?"

"Of course. It wouldn't be fair to you if you didn't get to do what you've wanted for so long."

Ren watched their exchange, backing away slowly.

"We're going to run," he whispered. "We'll find father and tell him what's going on. With the Spirit of Thunder, we'll have no trouble dealing with them."

"B-But what about-"

"Tadashi's dead, Lien."

"W-What do you mean, 'dead'?"

"The Tadashi you and I know is dead. This guy's replaced him. The Meihou Tadashi who tried to be like a knight to you is gone and he isn't coming back."

He could feel her tense, then start quivering. "I don't understand anything anymore..." she whispered. "I don't know who that woman is or why Tadashi wants revenge...I...I don't understand why you're saying that the only friend we've had is gone."

"He is."

"No! W-We can talk to him, get him to calm down! Whoever that 'Hao-sama' person is and what he's promised, we can make Tadashi understand that he can be happy just being our friend!"

Ren looked at her. She was crying, earnestly looking up at him, pleading with him to tell her that there was still hope. He looked away.

"Stop with your naïve ideals. I meant what I said. If he was like this before we even met him, then that means that the Tadashi we knew never existed at all. He was a fake. An Illusion."

She let go of him, backing away and stomping her foot. "I refuse to believe that! He...he...he made me so happy! You can't say that the person who took my first kiss was just a daydream! He's real! We can bring him back, Niisama, I know we can!" She stopped, as if she realized something. "I-I know! This must be an evil spirit that's taken over his body! Th-That MUST be it! Mama can use one of her tags to exorcise it, and we'll have Tadashi back! Y-Yeah! That's it!"

He couldn't look at her. The state she was in was so pitiful and sad that even their classmates would feel an ounce of sympathy for her. Still, he knew that she wouldn't leave until all their options for trying to bring their friend back had been exhausted.

"We'll try," he said finally. "But if things get bad, get out of here and run back home."

She looked happy, then confused. "'B-Bad'? What constitutes as 'bad'?"

He looked over his shoulder at her, his eyes glowing and belligerent.

"If you see fire, run away as fast as you possibly can."

She stared at him, then finally nodded. Ren turned his gaze back to the person in front of him. He blinked. Only the woman was there. He looked around.

_Dammit! Where did he go?_

"Hn...blue..."

Ren whipped around to see Tadashi standing in front of Lien. She was frozen, her eyes quivering, no doubt intimidated her friend's suddenly red eyes. He ran to get between them, but a bit of energy smacked him away, forcing him down into the mud.

"I'm trying to have a conversation here," Tadashi said in a taunting voice. "Just sit tight, Ren. I'll get to you." He turned back to Lien, whose gaze had also shifted to her brother. With his hands in his pockets, he smiled at her.

A shiver went up her spine as she turned her attention back to him. He was just smiling at her, not saying anything, and not moving. She kept looking away, only to return to him each time, as if he was silently forcing her to take notice of him. Finally, she swallowed.

"T-Tadashi...kun..." she said slowly, adding the honorific at the last moment. "What's going -"

"...blue..."

She froze again. "B-Blue? W-What about it?"

He leaned his face toward hers. Lien closed her eyes, almost hopeful.

_Please...I don't mind if you kiss me...Just do it so I know you haven't changed..._

But Tadashi passed her lips, his mouth instead stopping next to her ear.

"...Blue...I hate that color..."

She began shaking as her eyes flew open, knowing his adversity to her hair color couldn't be good.

"You can thank **her** for that." He snapped back in front of her so he could look her in the eye. "You'd never betray me, would you, Lien? If I gave my love to you, you wouldn't turn your back on me, would you?"

She trembled, but shook her head slowly. He smiled at her.

"Of course not. You're better than **she** could ever be. You'd never leave me for some 'friend.'" His right index finger trailed up her throat to her chin. "Tell me you love me."

Her eyes grew even wider. "...W-What?"

He tilted his head, a confident smile on his lips. "Tell me you love me, Tao Lien."

"Stop it! Leave her alone!" Ren cried, finally up from the mud. He brandished Houraiken and ran at him.

Tadashi glared at him. "You aristocrats have no manners." Three throwing knives appeared in his left hand. He smirked, then hurled them at the young heir.

Ren's eyes widened. He tried to dodge them, but one stabbed his left shoulder, while another pierced his ribs. The last grazed his right cheek. In agony, he fell to the mud again.

"Niisama!"

His enemy smirked and walked over to him. He placed his left foot on the fallen scion's head.

"What's wrong? Is this all the martial arts captain has to offer? You're more like some geezer doing Tai Chi!" He laughed and stomped on it a few times. "Hao-sama said that he asked your father to join him, but the jackass declined. Because of that, he was the weakest of the group. If he had just accepted Hao-Sama's offer, he could have had all the power he desired.

"He's nothing but a failure, marrying and breeding with someone who isn't a pure blooded shaman, thus tainting the Tao family bloodline forever. He couldn't find anyone else who would want him, could he? That's why he had to settle for a halfbreed." He paused, then laughed again. "Your whole body's shaking, Ren. Are you scared? Or maybe you're going to show me that famous Tao family anger I've heard so much about, hn?"

"Don't...talk about...my parents...like that..."

"Oh, is that it?" He pouted his lip and spoke in a mocking voice. "Little Renny-poo gets upset when people say bad things about his mommy, doesn't he?" He smirked. "I've heard all about your mom. Obsessed over your father like some freakish stalker all her life when she had only spent one month with him ten years before. A flat stick-girl with a round face and pigtails. A crybaby with no friends. A schizo who talked to all her dolls and stuffed animals because no one in the house wanted to be around her. I guess it's no surprise your parents got together. Idiocy loves company, after all." He cackled, then thew his head back and laughed.

Ren's left hand clenched the mud under it as his body continued to shake. His right hand whipped over to his left shoulder. In one swift movement, he yanked the knife out and drove it into Tadashi's leg. The cretin flinched in pain, letting out a small yelp and removing his foot from Ren's head. He pulled the knife out and grinned angrily at the muddy scion.

"You little bastard," he said. "You're just asking to die."

Ren smirked. "Sorry. As a Tao, I'm against dying before I'm good and ready. Especially in such pitiful circumstances. Besides, I warned you, didn't I?"

Tadashi chuckled. "Right, right. You did, you did. My apologies. I'll have to make it up to you." Then he looked genuinely angry. "This knife is an extra...I'D LIKE YOU TO HAVE IT!" He turned Ren over and moved to thrust the blade into his throat.

"I LOVE YOU!"

Tadashi stopped, the dagger mere inches away from the Tao heir's neck. He slowly turned his head to look at Lien, whose face was pale and seemingly disturbed, with good reason.

"You...love me?" he asked, standing up, seemingly forgetting about her brother.

Lien nodded and tried to smile. "I...I do. I've actually loved you for a long time...I was just too embarrassed to tell you."

Some of the red seemed to leave his eyes, and he dropped the knife as he made his way over to her. He looked genuinely excited. "Y-You love me? Really?"

Lien nodded nervously. "Really, really! You...You're the first boy I kissed, remember?"

"You...You don't hate it?"

"N-No! Of course not! I wish we did it more often!"

He looked overjoyed. He hugged her. "This is great! I'm so happy!" He turned around. "K-Kaasan! She said she loves me! We can stop everything now! As long as I have Lien, I don't need to get revenge! It doesn't matter to me as long as she's here!"

"She's lying,"

His happy smile vanished. After a few moments, a nervous one replaced it. "Kaasan, Lien wouldn't lie to me! She loves me! You don't lie to people you love!"

His "mother" closed her fan and looked at him pitifully. "But Tada-Darling, she _doesn't_ love you, so she _would_ lie to you. The only reason she said that was to save her brother."

He looked back at her. "W...What? Lien...is that true?"

The heiress took a step back, shaking her head frantically. "**She's** the one who's lying! Who...Who..." She pointed at her. "Who's SHE to judge people when she hasn't been there for you since you were little? How do you know she _really_ has your best interests in mind?"

Tadashi stared at his guardian, utterly confused. Then he turned back to Lien. Finally, he looked to the older woman again. "Kaasan, thank you for your concern, but I'd rather find out what Lien's true feelings are on my own."

Lien's eyes shifted to Ren, who was staring at her with an expression she couldn't read. She didn't know if he was angry or remorseful that she had blurted out those words in order to save him. He watched as Tadashi turned to her again, hugging her.

"Tell me you love me again," he whispered in her ear.

"I...love you,"

"Use my name."

"I love you, Tadashi."

He pulled back slowly and used his hands to cup her cheeks. "I've waited so long to hear you say those words...I'm so happy..." The red in his eyes still hadn't completely vanished.

"I mean them," she whispered.

He leaned his forehead down to touch hers. "If I kiss you, promise you won't hit me?"

"Of course..."

He smiled, then closed his eyes as he leaned down to begin a passionate kiss. She closed her eyes for a moment, then opened them again to look over at her brother.

_Thi...This isn't right...I know I have...some sort of feelings for Tadashi...but I know that Ren's the person I love...I...I can't lie like this... _But she knew that if she were to give up this charade, they both would be in danger.

His tongue was in her mouth. His hands were touching her hair and body. She could feel desire radiating from him like heat. Her mind was blank.

_W-What should I do? I..._

He abruptly pulled away from her. For a moment, she thought she saw a glare, but then he smiled again. He reached out to her. "Will you let me touch you?"

"T-Tadashi...I..."

"I'll be gentle, I promise."

She looked over at Ren again. His eyes were lowered, understandably due to not wanting to see his sister felt in such a way.

"Y-Yes..."

He smiled softly. "Thank you." His hand rested on her right breast. She flinched, causing him to chuckle. "You're so sensitive. It's cute. My cute little Lien..."

He kissed her again, rubbing the soft flesh in his hand. She reluctantly wrapped her arms around him.

"Yes...My cute little Lien," he whispered.

"My cute

little

**lying**

Lien..."

Her eyes shot open and he pulled back, his eyes completely red.

"That naïve side of me trusted you, but I won't let that happen again. Humans are selfish. They only care about themselves. They don't care who's hurt or stepped on as long as they get what they want."

She smiled nervously. "T-Tadashi! I love you! I-I mean it!"

He scowled at her, placing his middle and index fingers on her forehead. The scowl turned into an evil smile. He chuckled, shaking his head. "I'm going to get so much satisfaction from killing you."

"N-No!" she cried, but she couldn't move. It was as if she were bound by invisible chains.

"...But first, go have some nightmares. A lying, conniving, heartless girl like you deserves some. Hopefully, you'll dream about rape...again."

Ren finally found the strength to stand up - just as his sister fell to the ground like a ragdoll, her eyes closed.

* * *

"Damn him...leaving for work without even folding the laundry."

Rong's eye twitched as she stared at the three baskets full of laundry on the sofa. HoroHoro had skipped out on chores right after wiring money to Xue for plane tickets, which had been at around nine that morning; two hours ago. Now he had run off to his little store so he could tinker with custom snowboards and designer boots.

She walked over to the couch and looked at the baskets again. _That bastard...He's not topping for AT LEAST a month. _

A piece of paper caught her eye. She picked it up from the basket it was in and read the chicken scratch that was on it.

"_Sorry I had to skip out before I could do the folding. An emergency board repair came up, and all the other shops said they wouldn't do it for less than nine thousand yen, so I figured I'd help the guy out. I'll do the dishes this week, and I'll bottom for a month. Love you._

_-Aokun"_

She crumpled the paper into a ball and threw it behind her, her face red. "Stupid bastard..." she mumbled. "Thinking he can just get away with everything by saying he loves me..."

All the same, she picked up a shirt and began folding it. Another note was under it.

"_Today's the 12__th__, right? Almost the anniversary of when we started dating. Hehe."_

"If he had time to write these notes, why couldn't he have folded something?" She put the second note on the coffee table and began folding again. Soon, another note appeared. It was folded into thirds, closed like a pamphlet. When she opened it, something fell out, but she ignored it in favor of reading the note itself.

"_I took this after you fell asleep last night. Hehe. You're still cute even though you're old."_

"O-O-OLD?"

"_Just kidding. You don't look your age at all. I'm keeping the other picture I took at my desk at work. See you when I get home. Love you."_

She picked up the picture. It was of her sleeping, seemingly reaching out for her husband next to her, but touching nothing. He had, after all, been taking the picture. She put it on the table, her face red.

_Horokeu..._

As she looked around at the framed stick figure masterpieces that Xue and Seta had drawn when they were younger that lined the walls and the hand print soap "bars" that hung in the kitchen, she thought of how, more than twenty years ago, she had never thought of herself being where she was now - a mother and a wife to a family she loved more than anything.

"Ha...And to think, Pin-Mei was supposed to be the only thing I cared about. Now, I have three kids to take care of." She chuckled at her own joke. "Still, I never thought I was going to ever be out of China, much less out of the family." She looked to her left at a "family" picture of her family with Ren and Pin-Mei's. "I never thought she'd be so happy, that we'd finally be able to save her from the she-devil that was holding her down." Rong smiled. "We're all happy...I know things will work out for Ren and Pin-Mei. They always find some way to resolve whatever squabble they've brought on themselves. I believe in them."

The phone rang. Sighing, she walked over and answered it.

"Hello, Usui residence, Rong speaking."

"Hello there, Rong. It's been a while since I've heard that masculine voice of yours."

She froze, her whole body going numb.

_It...It...can't...be..._

Speak of the devil, and she shall appear.


	77. Echo of a Romantic

Um…wow…One day, I check the poll that's linked in my profile, and there's six votes. Then, I check a few days later, and there's sixteen. Hm. Interesting how Níu-Năi's winning even though he hasn't done all that much. Poor Xue, though D: Last I checked, she was losing more than everyone else.

I've been recruited as a scanner for the extras included in the new Kang Zeng Bang reprint volumes. While this is great, I still encourage all of you to keep buying the manga, and, if you can spare the money, buy the reprints as well. They're beautiful, with glossy, high-quality paper used for each page, beautiful covers featuring the characters as well as special clear-plastic covers with pictures of the featured character's oversoul on it. What I also love about them is that Takei took the time to go back and redraw some of the panels from the earlier chapters. For instance, Ren's bangs and hair wisps have been made longer, and some panels of him are COMPLETELY redrawn, making him look less boxy and more like his appearance later in the series. My favorite addition? Ren now sparkles when he's in his blazer. That's right - SPARKLES. Jun, on the other hand? Complete redraw. The whole page in which she makes her appearance is redrawn since her hair had a slightly different style at this time. Other panels where the differences could be spotted are redrawn as well. It's really exciting! So, if you can spare the money, buy the reprints. You won't regret it! I'll now end the Text Wall of Certain Doom.

**Notes: Sarcasm isn't widely used in Japan. As such, if you use sarcasm with someone who's Japanese, they most likely will think you're serious.**

**I talk about yen a couple times, so just use this really quick way to convert yen to dollars – take the amount of yen and divide it by 100. Using this method, 2000 yen would become 20 USD, 30000 yen would become 300 USD, and so on and so forth. I'm not going to try to predict inflation, so I'll use a recent conversion rate, which, at the time of writing is about 104 yen for every American dollar (Dollar signs don't even work here anymore. What a rip).**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Seven: Echo of a Romantic**

* * *

**February 11, 2025**

* * *

"Seta! You better get your butt in gear or you're going to be late!" Rong called into her son's room. She sighed and turned back to HoroHoro. "Every single morning, honestly…"

There was a rush of wind as Seta ran past her on his way out the door. Frowning, Rong grabbed a breakfast bar that was on the counter.

"What have I told you about leaving without breakfast?" she yelled, tossing the bar at him. It hit him squarely in the back of his head, causing him to fall over.

"Ye-Yes, Mom…" he said in a dazed voice.

Rong smiled, suddenly peppy. "Alright! Come enjoy the breakfast filled with your mother's love!"

He looked back at her his eyes wide. "Mom, you're scaring me."

She glared at him, obviously annoyed. "Get in the chair," she commanded, pointing to it.

He obeyed, scrambling before she went after him again. While this had been going on, his father had been calmly reading the newspaper while enjoying his rice.

"Every single morning," he murmured.

Seta looked down at his breakfast. "If I'm so late, why are you making me eat breakfast?"

"Oh, you're not late," Rong said calmly as she began eating her own food.

He looked around frantically. "B-But it's almost eight!" he cried.

"Look at your cell phone."

"My cell…phone…?" He took it out of his pocket. The display said it was seven thirty. He looked around again. "But all these clocks say it's seven fifty-five!"

"Oh, I turned them ahead so you'd think you were late and rush around. This way, we get to eat breakfast together."

"Mom…you're so…"

"-beautiful? Intelligent? Overall amazing?"

"…evil…"

Her eye twitched. "Why, thank you…"

"Haha! That's what you get when you fish for compliments!" her husband jeered. Rong raised her spatula like she was going to hit him and he cowered. She lowered it and sighed.

"I'm so outnumbered…I want Xue back."

"She's coming back tomorrow, so no worries."

There was silence. Seta looked at his food, then up to face his parents.

"Um…Mom…Dad…since we're going to be away on…_that day_, I'm going to go to…um…see Senpai today after school, so I might not be home for a while."

His parents looked at each other, then averted the other's gaze, glancing in opposite directions. Finally HoroHoro looked up, trying to smile.

"Just make sure you're back before it's dark out, alright?"

He nodded. "Okay, Dad."

For the past four years, Seta had taken to visiting the grave of a student who he had looked up to like a mentor, especially in the area of romance. It had been because of this person that he had finally been able to feel confident enough to even think about confessing his feelings. Everything he knew about how to make women feel special and loved had come from him. This, supplemented by his father's teachings of how women should be treated ("…with respect, even when they're throwing their shoes at you."), had made him into the sensitive hopeless romantic he was.

There was a thump next to him, and Seta looked to his left to see that Rong had set his bento for the day on the table. Then she slowly put a smaller one on top of it. He blinked at it, HoroHoro glancing at it as well. Rong herself looked down at it, then swiftly turned and went over to the sink, grabbing the dirty breakfast plates along the way.

"Mom?" Seta thought aloud, wondering what she had meant by giving him an extra box. She didn't reply, busying herself by rigorously washing the dishes.

He hesitantly accepted the extra bento and left after a quick good bye to his parents. After he was gone, Rong shut off the water and leaned over the sink in thought. HoroHoro came up behind her, rubbing her shoulder.

"At least this year Xue's away, so we don't have to worry about her remembering what happened."

She nodded. "But Seta knows what happened, why he's gone."

Xue never accompanied Seta to his senpai's grave, despite the fact that she had, in fact, been closer to him than her brother was. Each year, their parents struggled with him going to visit the grave without her knowing. She didn't grasp what was going on. She was just the bouncy, dorky, almost ditsy daughter who had served as the tie that had brought her parents together so many years ago. They didn't want to have anything happen that could jeopardize her bubbly personality and constant giggling.

"Hey, it'll be alright," he said as he continued his ministrations. "There's no chance of her remembering him while she's away. No one she's with knows about her like that. Don't worry."

She sighed, then turned around to hug him. "I'll try."

* * *

Seta bolted down the street toward his high school. Despite his mother's best intentions, the breakfast had made him late, meaning that he was once again at the mercy of the class bell.

_Please don't ring…Please don't ring…PLEASE DON'T RING!_

But of course, the large clock at the front of the school struck eight and the bell began to chime. He ran as fast as he possibly could toward the gates, which were now beginning to close as they always did when school started. This way, they could keep track of chronically tardy students since they needed to use the intercom next to the gate in order to get the security guard to open it for them. The gate clinked shut just as he got there.

"NO!" He pounded on it in anguish. After sighing, he slipped his schoolbag through the bars, and then took a few steps backwards. With a running start, he jumped and grabbed hold of the decorative iron curves that graced the barrier. When he was close enough, he jumped down managed to run into the school before the door closed.

Running down the empty hall, he found that it was inevitable that he would again have to face the wrath of his teacher, but he knew that he couldn't blame his mother. She had tried to help him and he didn't fully take advantage of it. He knew it was his own fault.

He skidded to a halt and pressed himself against the wall. The classroom door was closed, but that didn't mean his teacher was in there yet; he still had a chance. Slowly, he opened the door and looked around the room. No teacher. With a sigh of relief, he walked toward his desk.

The door slammed shut behind him. "Late again, Usui?"

He froze as his classmates giggled. Robotically, he turned to see his English teacher, Ms. Cross, smiling at him with silent annoyance. She was a young American teacher who had come to the school as part an exchange program to provide a richer and more effective learning experience. While pleasant, she seemed to almost enjoy berating him in front of his peers.

He smiled nervously. "Y-Yeah…sorry. I tried today, I really did!"

She looked at him doubtfully. "If you 'tried so hard', then why are you still late?"

"Well…um…" He looked at his feet. "My mom wanted me to eat breakfast with her and my dad."

Squeals of adoration escaped some of the female students. To be late for school so he could spend time with his family! What a noble cause!

"Come on, Ms. Cross, don't punish Seta! He was just trying to spend time with his family!"

"Yeah! And you shouldn't go to school without having breakfast anyway!"

"He looks really sorry!"

Their teacher played with the ends of her strawberry blonde ponytail. "Can we can a boy's opinion?"

"SPANK HIM!" cried one. Seta cringed.

"Itou, you know I don't approve of corporal punishment. Anyone else?"

"Make him do my homework!"

"Rejected. Next?"

This went on and on, each suggestion even more outrageous and self-serving than the last. "Rejected." She sighed. "Boys, those were all awful, most of them only benefiting yourselves. Congratulations, you all fail at life."

The boys erupted into cries of anguish and displeasure, some of them challenging the statement. Finally, the American sighed.

"Oh, that's right, sarcasm." She looked up. "HEY!" Silence. "None of you are failing my class. Not even Usui with his excessive tardiness. That was _sarcasm_. You know, that thing were I say something and I sound like I'm serious but I'm really making fun of you?"

They stared at her. She had tried to explain this concept to them before, but few had understood. After a while, some of them nodded. She turned to Seta, now playing with the silver necklace chain around her neck.

"I have a punishment for you." She opened the door and shooed him out, following him and closing the door. They walked a few steps before she turned to him.

Seta stared at the ground. "What's my punishment, Ms. Cross?"

She smirked. "Usui Seta, as punishment for your continued tardiness, you…"

He shut his eyes, hoping it wasn't too painful.

"…have to get me a headband like yours."

He looked up. His red hair, slightly spiked the way his father's was and going to his left side, was held in place by a red and black circlet made of cloth. His mother refused to give him "hers", so he had to wait until Xue was able to make one for him. He wore it everywhere, needless to say, although some of his teachers forced him to remove it during class. Ms. Cross, however, had never been one of these teachers, and now he knew why.

"What?"

She was starry-eyed and hopeful. "I-I've always wanted one, and now you've been late so much that I can give you a punishment like this! I'm really excited!"

"Um…are you doing that sarcasm thing again?"

"No, no, of course not! I honestly would like a headband like yours. I really like the design. You made it yourself, right?"

"M-My sister did…"

"Oh, well, it doesn't matter! Just give me one soon, okay?"

"O-Okay…"

"A pink one!"

"I'll…try…"

"Yay! This is so cool! A real Ainu headband just for moi!" she cried, hopping up and down with childish glee. She stopped and looked over her shoulder to see her student staring at her, a disturbed expression on his face. "Don't look at me like that! I just want something cool to go with my winter jacket!"

"Still…Ms. Cross…"

She straightened and cleared her throat, once again playing with her hair. "You may go return to the classroom now," she said, her voice once again serious. The class was dead silent as they watched them return, the teacher going to her desk.

"I hope you all learn from Usui's mistakes. You don't want to find yourselves with a punishment worse than his."

"Yes, Ms. Cross," her students replied in unison.

Seta sighed, thinking about how he would going to ask his sister to make him a headband.

"Good." Up until this point, she had been speaking Japanese. Since class had begun, she quickly switched to her native tongue. "Now, take out your books and turn them to page 285. Here we will be discussing words that have to do with fairy tales. First, the word 'princess'. Can anyone think of a Japanese word that this sounds like?"

"Purinsesu!" a few students yelled out.

"Right, it's what we call a 'cognate' in English. This means that the two words sound alike. So, as long as you can remember 'purinsesu' instead of another word that could mean 'princess', such as 'hime' or 'oujo', it will be an easy word to remember. Now, everyone, repeat it. 'Princess'."

"Purinsesu."

"No, you're saying it in Japanese. Say it in English. 'Princess'."

"Purinsesu."

"Stop pronouncing the 'u' at the beginning and end. I'm an American, so conform to me, dammit!" The class laughed and she smirked. "One more time; 'Princess'."

The class was silent. Most were tongue tied.

"Preenseess!" Seta said in an unintentionally loud voice. The class laughed. Their teacher sighed.

"…C-Close enough." She knew that she wasn't going to be able to get them to say it perfectly in one day. "Can anyone use it in a sentence?" A girl raised her hand. "Okay, Sumiko, let's hear it."

The girl took a deep breath. "I think Seta's pun…puny…" She looked up. "How do you say 'bachi' in English?"

Her teacher blinked. "Punishment…"

"Oh yeah! I think Seta's punishment is to dress like a princess," she said, Engrish abound.

Silence. Then the fangirls squealed.

"That would be SO CUTE!"

"Oh my gosh, yes! I wanna see it!"

"PLEASE tell me that's the punishment!"

"I call being the prince!"

"No! I'M going to be the prince!"

They continued to fight as Seta looked at them. Xue had gotten him to dress up like a girl when he was little, which he in part blamed his sensitivity on, but the idea of wearing a dress when he was almost seventeen wasn't all that enticing.

Ms. Cross clapped her hands. "Alright, ha-ha, yes, it's funny. Now be quiet." She turned to the Ainu. "Would you be interested in changing your punishment?"

Seta slammed his head onto his desk. "Never," he mumbled. _If Lien found out, she'd never want to go out with me._

* * *

Finally, when school was over, Seta picked up the small bento and started on his way toward the shrine. As he passed a drug store, he stopped to buy some soap and a rag to clean the gravestone with. An old man on the corner asked him if he needed some flowers "for his girlfriend", so he accepted and bought a small bouquet of white chrysanthemums as an offering.

When he arrived, he was the only one there, not that he surprised by it. Despite his outgoing personality, Senpai had been promptly forgotten about after even the girl he loved seemed to forget about him. Without the need to console her, their classmate was treated like he had moved away.

But Seta never forgot. He hadn't been there when Senpai died, but the whole thing had an effect on him. It hadn't been since his best friend's apparent death that he had to deal with the feelings of suddenly realizing you'll never talk to someone ever again. He had been upset for a while, crying even, but once he had snapped out of it, he visited his senpai's empty apartment and found a notebook with a note on top.

"_Sorry I couldn't teach you how to woo that girl you like before this. Hopefully this'll teach you a little more. I'll be rooting for ya."_

The fact that he had taken the time to write a note to him beforehand had disturbed him greatly, but eventually he was able to accept Senpai's gift and try to learn something from the various notes the boy had written. Despite it being a gift, Seta had ripped the last few pages out and burned them, not wanting to deal with the words contained within its pages.

As he walked up the stone steps, Seta could see the medium sized grave come into view. Another grave belonging to his father was next to it. All he could muster was a sad smile. His mentor's will to live had vanished when his father was killed. He had clung to the girl he loved, but when she suddenly distanced herself from him, the loneliness had been too much for him to take.

"I'm here, Senpai…" he said quietly. Silently, he took off his headband, seemingly as a show of respect. He knelt down and set the bento on the small altar, opening the cloth covering it. Then he set a pair of chopsticks on it. "Mom made this for you. It's kinda amazing how she still remembers your favorite foods." He took out his own bento and opened it to reveal that half of it had been saved. "I know it's not a good idea to eat here, but I want to keep you company for a while, you know? I mean, I don't know how many other people come see you, so I don't want you to get lonely."

Usually, one would expect that, at this time, the deceased boy's spirit would appear and pretend to eat the bento with his kōhai, but this wasn't the case. Even mere hours after his death, no one in the family was able to find his spirit. It had bothered him because he had wanted to make sure that the boy who was like an older brother to him would safely make it to the afterlife and be able to rest in peace. During these four years, Xue had claimed that she would sometimes feel something in the middle of the night, but their parents had told her it was just a rogue spirit out to play some tricks on her. Senpai's spirit never truly appeared.

He finished the bento. "I'll just leave yours there…maybe you'll come get it at some point…"

Then he set to work on washing the gravestone. It got so dirty every year, and he was sure that he was the only one who visited him. It didn't surprise him, though, considering the circumstances of his death.

"I hope you're not upset that Xue never comes..." he said as he took out a toothbrush and began removing dirt from the kanji engraved upon the stone. "Mom and Dad are just protective of her. They don't want her to get sad by reminding her that you're gone."

He stopped to scrub some especially stubborn grime. Once it was gone, he wiped his forehead and stared at the ground.

"They took away her yearbook, pictures, letters…deleted your number from her phone, deleted emails…It was…kind of sad. It felt like they were erasing you from her life, like you never existed. I didn't like it, but if my parents thought that it would make sure that Xue could continue being her happy self, then, I guess I understand.

"She'll mention you once in a while; saying that she tried to send you a letter and it never got to you. It's sad, but she thinks you moved away." His fist clenched. "Part of me wishes I could just tell her the truth. It's not fair for you to be treated like this." His face softened. "But I don't want her to cry again. That was too much to take. I hated that more…sorry…"

He sighed and sat back, cross-legged. "Last time I talked to Ren, he said some guy's transferred into their class from Japan, and he's after Lien. I'm...nervous about losing to him. I want to be able to make her happy, but I don't want to force her away from this guy if she's already developed feelings for him." He shook his head sadly. "I'm pathetic, right? You didn't teach me to be like this..."

"_Listen, if there's a girl you want, go after her with all the love and sincerity you have. Give her all you've got. If she doesn't feel the same, be sad for a day, then move on. It's not worth being sad over a girl who doesn't love you. Just love with no regrets."_

"I...I love her. I know I do. It's not some puppy love anymore, like when I was a kid. I honestly want to have her with me day and night. I want to be able to look at her smile and touch her hair and smell that lotus shampoo she uses whenever I want to. She's...special. I...don't want anyone else to have her but me."

He looked away, not used to having such selfish desires. Seta was the goody-goody. The angel. The selfless guy that would probably help his friend hook up with a girl in his class, even if he himself was pursuing her.

"I'm leaving for her house in a couple days, and I want to get her something, but I don't know what. It's a twelve hour plane ride, so I don't think any flowers I got would be fresh by that point." He groaned and leaned his head on his fist.

"_Okay, this is what I got her: We all know girls like stuffed animals for White Day, right?"_

"_R-Right!"_

"_So find out what her favorite animal is, and then get her a stuffed animal of it! Then put some chocolate in its arms, attach some original poetry or a heartfelt letter, and then, voila! Most girls go for it, trust me!"_

Seta lightly pounded his forehead with his fist. "Lien's favorite animal…Lien's favorite animal…" His eyes flew open. "THAT'S IT!" He quickly gathered his things and stood, leaving the flowers and bento box in front of the grave. He stood up and bowed. "Thank you, Senpai! Sorry for leaving so soon! I'll come again when I'm back from Lien's house!"

He dashed down the street, getting yelled at by elders and others that he pushed by and ran around. Finally, he skidded in front of a toy store and rushed in and up to the counter, where there were thankfully no waiting customers.

Seta slammed his right palm on the finished wood, his head down as he panted. The two female employees behind the registers were shaking and holding each other, obviously scared by the boy's passion.

"C-Can we help you find something, sir?"

After a few more pants he looked up at them, fire burning in his eyes. They cringed.

"I NEED THE BIGGEST, SOFTEST, FLUFFIEST, HIGHEST QUALITY LEMUR YOU HAVE!" he said in a triumphant voice.

They stared at him, then one of the girls used a shaking hand to point him to the opposite side of the store. "T-They'd be over there!"

"Thank you," he said before running off to find the perfect primate to adopt.

He walked up to the wall of plushies that stretched across the back of the store. He stared at it, slight intimidation apparent in his eyes.

"This must be what Auntie Pin-Mei's room looked like when she was little…"

Surprisingly, there were quite a few choices for lemurs - something he hadn't planned on. He touched all of them, not really knowing what he was testing for. Being a boy, he hadn't held a stuffed animal since he was a toddler. Frustrated, he shoved them back into their cubby holes and folded his arms, tapping his foot.

_Now what do I do? I can't tell what a good stuffed animal feels like!_

A hand reached up and took one of the lemurs. He glanced over to see Rong squeezing it, then tug on the tail before putting it back and taking another one.

"M-Mom? What are you doing here?"

She was silent for a moment, murmuring to herself about materials and the amount of cotton used. After another inspection, she shook her head and put it back.

"Did you see me come in?"

She was taking another one. "No," she replied in an airy voice. "I heard you."

He blushed. "W-Was I really that loud?"

"Yes. People on the streets stopped and looked at the store. Some turned around so they could stay away from it."

He hung his head. "Sorry…I was just excited…"

"Here."

Seta looked up to see his mother holding out one of the lemurs to him. He took it, immediately able to feel the difference from the others. "It's really soft!"

She smiled at him. "That company's one of the best in the business. Some of the others use lead and sweatshops, so they're dangerous and break easily. The thread and materials in this one are all high quality. It'll last as long as Ren's little plush tiger." She cackled to herself.

Her son stared at her. "How do you know so much?"

She gave a light chuckle. "I used to buy stuffed animals for Pin-Mei all the time when she was little. After twelve years, you begin to develop an expertise for quality and value. I must have bought her over five hundred since she was two." She looked away for a moment. "I guess I still haven't forgotten those days."

He smiled brightly as he held the toy. "Thanks, Mom!" He seemed about ready to lunge and hug her, but noticed a few girls from his class looking at him and giggling. He stayed where he was.

Rong narrowed her eyes. "I just helped you out. Hug me or I'll rip that poor lemur in half."

He cringed. "Y-Yes, Mom…" He put the lemur on a pile next to him and hugged her. From over her shoulder, he could see that the girls now had on touched faces of adoration, quiet "aww"s being cooed at each other. He didn't care really. He made a promise when he was younger to ignore what his classmates, especially the female ones, thought of him.

They finally parted. Rong smiled at him as he took the lemur from the pile again and held it close to him, as if to make sure no obsessed lemur fan would try to rip it from his loving hands.

"It's for Lien, isn't it?"

He squeezed the plush body. "Yeah…"

"I'm sure she'll love it, considering how she's already like her mother in some respects. But why a lemur?"

"It's her favorite animal," he replied quietly.

She laughed and touched her forehead. "I should have known. At least half of Pin-Mei's collection was panda bears."

He held it out in front of him and smiled at it, then brought it close to him again. "I better go pay for this."

"Uh, I think I should," she said quickly.

"Why?"

"You've probably scared the clerks so bad that they don't want to have the misfortune of waiting on you." She held out her hand. "Just give me the money, I'll do it."

He blushed out of embarrassment of his previous actions, then went into his school bag and took out his wallet. He handed her the lemur and three thousand yen. "It's…expensive."

"Quality IS expensive. It's like expecting to be able to pay two thousand yen for DVD." She walked up and bought it, then handed her son the decorative bag that it came in. He looked inside, smiled, then closed it again.

"What do I do now?" he asked.

"What do you mean, 'What do I do now'? Either make or go buy some chocolate, then make a mix tape or a poem or something and give it to her. It's not that hard, really." He just stared at her. Rong shook her head and put her hand on her brow. "Just as clueless as your dad. Took him FOREVER to figure out how to be romantic. Even Ren was better at setting the mood than he was." She grabbed his arm and pulled him out onto the sidewalk as they started for home.

"Do you...really think she'll like this?" he asked slowly after an extended silence.

"I think we're at a point where you know her better than I do. I can read people pretty well still, but that doesn't mean I know what will make them happy. Personally, I think she'll be happy at just the thought."

"R-Really?"

"If what you say about her and Ren not having any friends at school is true, I think she'll be happy to get something. Even if she doesn't see it as romantic, I think you'll get a hug out of it at the very least."

"Thanks...I feel better now."

She nodded with a smile. "Good."

They walked in silence for a few minutes. Her eyes kept shifting over to him, knowing that his mind was still racing.

"M-Mom..."

"What is it?"

"I-If Uncle Ren says I can be engaged to Lien when we go there, will you let me go through with the ritual?"

She tensed. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

He stepped in front of her. "Yes, you do! I talked about it before! If I become Lien's fiancé, I want to go through the ritual you did for Auntie Pin-Mei after she was born! I want to prove to the Tao family that I'm serious about her! I don't want to be with anyone else but her!"

Rong looked at the sidewalk sadly. "It's...very painful. Extremely painful. If you cry, they'll think of you as a disgrace. You can't even whimper. If you go through with it, Seta, be prepared for the worst kind of pain imaginable. No anesthetic, nothing to numb it."

He nodded. "I know that. I just want them to know that I plan on protecting her for the rest of my life."

She touched her arm. "If that's really what you want...I'll see if I can convince them. I can't guarantee anything, though. I'm not part of the family anymore. I'm not in the records or anything. I'll see if my bro- I mean...the head of the family will allow it."

He bowed slightly. "Thank you."

* * *

When he got in, Seta put the lemur next to his bed and picked up a calling card on his nightstand. He hadn't called Lien in a while. He was expecting a happy conversation and possibly give her a hint that he had gotten her something.

But that wasn't the case. Mere minutes into the conversation, she was crying. Things weren't going well at home. Ren had done something to betray her trust. Her parents were fighting. She was lonely.

Seta clenched his fist. _Where the hell is that other guy if she's so depressed? HE'S there, HE should be taking care of her right now. That bastard..._

"Don't worry," he said finally. "We'll be there within a few days. I'll bet my parents can at least help your parents sort out what's going on, and I'll help you and Ren." He paused. "And…well…I mean…If you want me to, I'll hold you and you can tell me about everything that's bothering you. I promise I'll listen."

"Thank you…Thank you so much…I know I'll feel better once you and everyone else gets here. I'm so lucky to have a friend like you," she whispered, her voice raspy from crying.

"D…Don't mention it…"

He listened to her sniffles for a few minutes, then couldn't keep quiet anymore.

"Are you...making chocolate for anyone this year?"

She was silent for a moment. "I'm not sure...I can't really get in the mood right now..."

"I understand..."

"B-But if I do, I'll make sure you get some!"

He closed his eyes with a smile. "Thank you. Your chocolate last year was wonderful."

"Oh, you suck-up. It tasted like panda poo and you know it!"

"It was...um...delicious...poo?"

She burst out laughing, and he could hear the phone being moved around. He guessed that she was sitting somewhere and had put the phone down to hold her sides, which made him feel at ease. When she got on the phone again, she was still trying to calm down.

"You...You're amazing, Seta, you know that?"

"T-Thank you..."

"Alright, even though I didn't plan on making any chocolate, I'll make sure I make some for you, okay?"

"Okay, I promise I'll eat all of it!"

"It's _your_ funeral!"

They laughed, then Seta looked at the shopping bag from the toy store.

"Hey...Lien...I got you something, since I know you don't have White Day in China. So...um...I really hope you like it."

There was silence. "You...got me something?"

"Yeah. I wanted to make sure you got something on a day where you're supposed to feel special. Because you deserve it."

"Seta..."

"And...I..." He tugged on the black collar of his school uniform, then unbuttoned it. His room had suddenly become unusually hot. "When I see you, I...I want to tell you something."

"You can't tell me now?"

"N-No...It'll ruin it unless we do it face-to-face."

She paused. "Alright." She giggled. "You going to announce your undying love for me or something?"

He froze. She was laughing. He brushed it off. "Maybe I am," he replied, trying to sound mysterious.

"Ahaha...You're so cute, Seta. Don't ever change. I love you just the way you are." She laughed again.

"Just as long as you don't either. I love your personality too much for you to change."

_Even just saying it like that, I feel so relieved._

* * *

When he got off the phone, he sat down at his desk with a pen and a piece of paper. It was time to write the poem his senpai had been talking about.

"_Okay, so, to write a love poem, think about how you felt when you first saw her. Think about what she looks and smells like, and what she reminds you of. Tell her about the kinds of feelings she makes you experience, and how no one else can make you feel the way she does. Even if it just ends up being a letter, don't hold back. Tell her how much she means to you. Without using those three words, make that poem say 'I love you'."_

He tapped his pen on the desk. "Well, she has that shampoo...And with how yellow her eyes are, she kind of reminds me of a cat...a kitten, maybe? And she's so cute when she sleeps...and I love her laugh...She's...beautiful..."

He took to leaning on his fist, grinning as he daydreamed about her.

_She's flawed...she oversleeps, she's clumsy, she gets overly excited, she forgets to do homework, she's so dependent on her dad and Ren sometimes, she can sometimes be oblivious..._

_She's flawed...but that's why she's so perfect to me._

* * *

**February 12, 2025**

* * *

"Yeah, it'll be ready. I'm almost done with it. No problem, I'm glad I could help. Yeah, see you then."

HoroHoro hung up the phone. He held up the snowboard he was glazing and looked at it. Satisfied, he put it on a rack near the sales counter. As he did so, beeping horns and screeching tires could be heard from outside. He blinked, trying to get a glimpse of what was going on.

Someone was jumping on cars, rolling over them, and dodging them as she made her way across the street. His eyes widened as she burst into the store.

"Rong? Is there a reason why you're causing car pile-ups outside? 'Because I feel like it', isn't an acceptable answer."

"This isn't a joke!" she yelled, her face red, her voice exhausted due to her running. She put her hand on the counter for support. "I'm way too old for this..."

"Um, so why are you disrupting traffic again?"

She looked up at him. "Close the store."

"What? Why?"

"We have a bigger problem. I'll say more once you close the store."

"Rong, I'm sure whatever's going on is important to you, but I can't just close randomly during the day. It's not fair to the customers."

She straightened, a fierce look in her eyes. "I'm telling you to close the store! I'll explain once everyone's gone!"

"Why can't you tell me the reason now?"

"Because it's really private, and I don't want these humans to panic!"

He folded his arms. "Rong, I'm not closing the store. We're going to lose a lot of revenue, and plus this guy's coming to pick up his board and..."

Rong clenched her fists, her eyes not visible to him.

"...I'm sure whatever it is can wait until tonight..."

Without warning, Rong grabbed the nearest snowboard, holding it vertically, and, with a wild look in her eyes, slammed it down on the counter between her and her husband. The board snapped in half. Glass flew everywhere, cutting her arms and face.

He stared at her with wide eyes. She was panting and holding one of the broken halves of the board in the hands. Angrily, she hurled it past him, hitting the framed picture of an Olympic snowboarder from their country's team. He flinched, covering his head with his hands. Once the glass stopped falling, he looked at her. She was still breathing hard. He still couldn't see her eyes.

"NOW WILL YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO ME?-!" she screamed in a voice he hadn't heard her use in years.

"R-Rong..."

She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face.

"XUE MIGHT DIE!"


	78. Your Call Is Important to Us

This may be the last chapter until the end of May. I have finals and such, so I need to do well on those, which include writing a short story on immigration and also painting a picture having to do with it. So, expect another late update after this.

**Notes: I borrowed the teddy bear superstition from the Sakura Card arc of Cardcaptor Sakura in this chapter. This idea is the product of CLAMP, the creators of the series. I do not claim that I came up with it myself.**

**I had to improvise with Hana's personality, since you don't really learn too much from Funbari no Uta. I apologize if you don't agree with my choice.**

**The X-League is the name of Japan's organization for American football.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Eight: Please Hold, Your Call Is Important to Us**

* * *

As Rong requested, HoroHoro prematurely closed the shop. After they cleaned up some of the mess Rong had made (and HoroHoro cried at the self-estimated damage), they went into the back room to sit around the phone chip player.

Answering machines that used cassettes were a thing of the past. Now, all home phones had slots that allowed a computer chip to be slid inside. These chips were usually only used to record messages, but could also record entire conversations if the right chip was put in.

"Once I heard that voice," Rong said, "I stalled long enough so I could find the chip and put it in before she said anything important."

He squinted at her as he slipped the chip into the player. "Who's 'she'?"

Rong lowered her eyes. "Just listen. You'll know the moment you hear it."

Confused, he pressed play and backed up so he could sit next to her. She looked at the ground, and he tentatively held her hand. If something could visibly affect her this badly, then he probably had a reason to be concerned. He turned his attention to the player as the recording began.

"**-got yourself kicked out of the family. Why Rong, your pride must have vanished. That emblem on your back means nothing now. You endured all that pain as a little girl for nothing. You threw away your position as head of the guards for that bastard daughter of yours." She laughed.**

HoroHoro's eyes widened. "No way..."

"**I think you mean 'beautiful' daughter. She was beautiful when she was born and she's beautiful now, all because of both her Chinese and Japanese blood. Also, I fail to see why you should care. Needless to say, after what happened, I never expected to hear from you ever again."**

"**Normally, Rong, I would not waste my time with you, but I just thought you might like to know that my 'son' and I are eager to meet with your daughter again. He hasn't seen her in so long, and I know they are going to have much to talk about..."**

"**What are you talking about? What 'son'? I know you're not talking about Kai."**

**She laughed. "It is someone your family knows very well. He has been waiting patiently for four years for a chance to see your precious daughter again, and who am I to deny him the pleasure?"**

"**Him..." She scoffed. Then there was a gasp of realization. "…Him? No way…W-What exactly does he plan on doing?"**

"**Talking, at the very least. At the very most, maybe killing..."**

"**KILLING? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? HE ****LOVED**** HER!"**

"**Yes, well, she didn't love him back. There is only so much a boy his age can take. The ways she lied to him...cheated on him...I don't blame him for wanting revenge."**

A slam could be heard, which HoroHoro presumed was the sound of Rong's fist hitting the counter.

"**Xue NEVER cheated on him! It's not in her nature! I followed the relationship closely, so I would KNOW if she had been seeing someone else at the same time!"**

"**Do you know what made her distance herself from him in the first place?"**

"**...N-No...I don't remember. It was a long time ago!"**

"**Oh? Did you not just say that you had been following the relationship closely? If that is true, how could you have missed something so vital?" She laughed when Rong said nothing.**

HoroHoro squinted and tilted his head as he heard the next voice. It was far off, like someone was calling from across the room.

"**Kaasan! Can I call Lien now? It's been a long time since I've talked to her!"**

"Oh my gods..." he whispered.

"**Of course, darling. Just let Kaasan finish her conversation." She turned back to the phone. "Well, I must be going now. My son and I are on a London vacation. We have so much to do, such as visiting a friend of that pitiful husband of yours."**

"**W-Wait! What are you talking about? What is he doing with Lien? And don't you dare talk about my husband like that!"**

He glanced at her, touched that she was thinking about that despite all the other things being thrown at her.

"**Oh you will find out soon enough. Just make sure you keep in touch with your daughter. That is what those 'cell phones' are for, correct?"**

"**You better not touch her! NEITHER OF YOU BETTER FUCKING TOUCH HER – YOU HEAR ME?"**

Then there was a dial tone. Rong stood up and turned the player off, but not before a few sobs came from it.

"I don't understand any of this..." HoroHoro whispered. "Why is she back? HOW is she back? I thought she was killed more than twenty years ago..."

"I don't know," she replied softly. "But Xue's on her way to play peace keeper for the Tao family, so we have to get in touch with her, as well as Ren and Pin-Mei." She breathed. "I can't even imagine what Pin-Mei's reaction is going to be..."

He was silent for a moment. "We should go. We can't risk anything happening."

She nodded, but looked back at him. "But Seta...he's still at school..."

HoroHoro scratched his head. "We...may have to have him join us there. You remember what it was like taking him out of school when we had to take Xue to the hospital."

Another nod. "You're...You're right...I hate leaving him here though...Especially after this..." She slipped the chip into her pocket and turned around. With her husband standing in front of her, she took a few steps forward and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Rong..."

"Just...hold me for a while, okay? After that, I can be myself again..."

He wrapped his arms around her as she broke down and began sobbing into him. Slowly, he lowered them both to their knees, allowing her to lean against him as her crying continued. With soft eyes, he rubbed her back, occasionally kissing her as he did so.

"I...I don't want to lose her..." she whispered. "I can't imagine life without her...X...Xue..."

He stroked her hair. "I know. None of us can. We'll go there and make sure she's alright, okay? Once we're there, we can make sure nothing bad will happen to her."

"But...what if they make her remember what happened? If we don't get there in time, she'll have to suffer by herself!" She shook her head. "She doesn't deserve to suffer any more than she already has!"

"I know…" She stopped crying for a moment, and his eyes shifted toward her. "You can keep crying for a little while longer if you want. I don't think any less of you for doing it."

"I'll cry for as long or as short as I want," she whispered fiercely.

He smiled and leaned his head against hers. "Alright, alright, I hear you."

Rong sat up and wiped her eyes. "For right now, let's call Seta and let him know we're leaving early. Then I'll try to get in touch with Pin-Mei…though I don't know what I'm going to say exactly…"

"Maybe we should tell Ren and have _him_ tell Pin-Mei? At least that way he can make sure she's sitting down when she hears about this."

She bit her thumb. "Yeah…but with their fighting…"

He shrugged. "Putting aside whatever fight they had in order defeat an evil grandmother…I personally can't think of a better way to make up."

She sighed. "Dork."

* * *

"So what are you doing for Valentine's Day?"

"Well, Shin's been giving me all these looks lately, so I'm going to offer him some chocolate!"

"Really? Store or homemade?"

"Homemade of course! What do you take me for?"

"Just checking! Some girls are getting lazy, you know."

"'But not me,' is what you're gonna say, right?"

"Right!"

"Aya-chan, you're so amazing!"

"Not as amazing as you, Sachiko-chan!"

They intertwined their hands and squealed. Then Aya took out a sewing kit with felt, foil-covered foam wings, and black eyes.

"What's that, Aya-chan?"

"I was reading some of my mom's old manga, and in one, this guy gave the girl he liked a teddy bear that he made himself. It said that if someone makes a bear and sews their name into it, then they give it to that person, if that person names the bear after the giver, they'll love each other forever!"

"IS THAT TRUE?"

Both girls jumped as Seta appeared next to them.

"D-Does that really work?"

"Um…well…" Aya looked at her materials. "I don't know for sure, but I figure it's worth a try. I mean, I'm not good at making chocolate, but I think this is better than buying some."

Seta stared at the bag. "Do they come in little kits like that?"

She nodded. "I got mine at the toy store. I saw you there yesterday with the lemurs." She giggled along with her friend.

Seta gave a nervous smile. "Well, um, you know…It was just an idea." He looked serious again. "Do you think it'd be overkill if I made a bear for her, too?"

The two girls looked at each other, then smiled. "Well, if I got two gifts from one guy, it'd show me that I'm really important to him. As long as she's not some serious, broody hermit I think she'd really like them both," they said in unison.

He clenched his fist in determination. "Alright! I'm going to make a bear!"

His classmates giggled and clapped. Then he looked depressed.

"What's wrong now?"

"This means I have to go back to the toy store. After what happened yesterday, I don't think they'll want to deal with me again…" He sulked, his brilliant idea steadily falling apart in his mind.

"Here."

He looked up to see one of the bagged kits in front of him. Surprised, he took it. "Y-You're giving this to me?"

Aya nodded. "I have a few extras, so you can have one."

His eyes lit up. "Wow! Thank you!" He looked at it. The fur was a cream color, with white, shiny wings that he would attach to it. "Thank you so much…"

They blinked at him. "You're not going to cry, are you?"

"N-No! I'm just excited! I feel good about this! I can't think of a reason why she'd reject me now!" He froze. "Other than that she likes that other guy…" he mumbled.

"Unless that guy can sew, I think you have nothing to worry about," they asserted.

He scratched the back of his head. "Well…uh…the thing is…I can't sew either. Ehehe…"

They stared at him. "Why did you even think about making a bear if you've never sewn before?"

"I-I just thought it would be a cute idea…"

The girls giggled to each other again. "He used the word 'cute'!" They stopped and smiled at him.

"We can teach you during lunch if you want," Aya said.

"Once we start you off, you'll have no problem!" Sachiko finished.

He smiled at them again. "Thanks, you two, I really appreciate it."

But later on, as they began teaching him, his cell phone vibrated. "Sorry," he said as he pulled it out of his bag. He looked at the ID. "Mom…? But she knows not to call during school…unless it's an emergency," he whispered the last part to himself. "Hello?"

"Seta, your father and I are leaving for China right now."

His eyes widened. "W-W-What? W-What about me?"

"I'm really sorry, trust me, I am. But something's come up. We sent Xue ahead of us, and we think we may have made a mistake in doing so. We need to go make sure she's okay."

"Neesan's…in trouble?"

There was a pause. "No, we just think it will be too much for Ren and Pin-Mei to handle on their own."

"Okay…I understand…" he said, his shoulders drooping.

"I've changed your tickets already. You can pick them up at the airport. If you need Hana or someone else to come with you, I've reserved an extra ticket, just in case."

"O-Okay…Thank you…" He hated the thought of being alone on that god-forsaken plane.

"Thank you, Seta. I really appreciate your understanding. We'll make it up to you, we promise. We're really sorry."

"O-Okay...I'll see you there, I guess..."

"Your father and I love you, Seta. Remember that."

"I will, Mom. I love you too."

"Alright, bye. Call us if anything goes wrong."

"I will. Bye."

He closed the clamshell phone slowly, staring at it before putting it back in his bag. Aya and Sachiko cocked their heads at him.

"What's going on?"

He sighed sadly. "My parents are going ahead of me to China for our vacation. Now I have to go on that eleven hour plane ride by myself...And I really hate planes."

"Awww!" they cooed. "Don't worry! Just concentrate on making your bear, and you'll forget that you're on the plane at all!"

"Yeah...Yeah! You're right! This is perfect! It gives me the chance to work on my bear!"

"FAITO!" they cried, each pumping an arm.

* * *

"Hello?"

"Um...Hana?"

"Oh! If it isn't Seta! What's up?"

"Um...I was wondering if you could come with me to Ren and Pin-Mei's house. My parents left early, and you know how I am with planes...so..."

Hana thought for a moment. "I guess I could. I'll just need to escape before my mom finds out."

"Right…I forgot…Your mom…"

"Don't worry about it, though! If you really need me to come that much, I promise I'll be there! Come hell, high water, or my mom!"

He let out a small whimper, and Seta could hear Anna's monotone voice on the other end.

"D-Don't worry, Mom! _Seta_ called _me_, so he's footing the bill!"

The Ainu sighed. _Not this again…_

"So, Seta, I'll meet you at the connecting flight in Tokyo, okay?"

"That'll be in a couple hours. I'm getting out early because I just have to take one more exam."

"Alright, well, I'll be there!" His voice dropped to a whisper. "You're paying for my ticket, right?"

Seta could almost feel the glare Anna was giving her son. "Y-Yeah! Of course!"

"J-Just making sure…"

* * *

Rong closed her phone and sighed.

"How did he take it?" HoroHoro asked.

"I feel like I'm abandoning a puppy in a cardboard box on a rainy night."

"Hey…He'll be fine. I bet Hana will go with him. He's his father's son, after all."

"You're right…" She shook her head quickly. "Alright, Ren next."

"You want me to?"

"No, it's fine. I'm the one who actually talked to her." She pressed a few buttons and held the phone to her ear. It rang multiple times. "Come on, servants, do your job…"

Finally, someone picked up. "Hello, this is the Tao residence,"

_Darn, it IS a servant._ "Hello, this is Rong calling. May I please speak to the head of the family?" If she said 'Ren', she would have to go through the trouble of clarifying which one.

"This maid is sorry, but Master Ren is unavailable to speak at the moment. However, this one would be more than happy to take a message for him."

"I can't accept a message. This is of the utmost importance. Please find him and tell him it's an emergency."

"I'm sorry, but I can't have you foiling Kaasan's plans."

"W-What?"

There was a dark giggle. "I know you want to warn them, but I can't allow that. We've worked too hard to get to this point. I won't allow you to ruin her plans."

"Who is this?"

"You were right to threaten me all those years ago. It's a pity Pin-Mei didn't listen to you."

"Huan? It's you, isn't it?"

"Qiao Huan, at your humble service."

"YOU WITCH! I'LL KILL YOU FOR SURE, YOU HEAR ME?"

Dial tone.

"Hello? HELLO?"

Angrily, she closed the phone and tossed it. Her husband raced after it, using a catch that would have made an X-League player proud to save it from smashing against the wall. He got up, rubbing his head.

"I'm guessing that didn't go well."

Rong was already pacing in circles. "Thatbitchthatbitchthatbitch THAT BITCH I'LL KILL HER THE MINUTE WE GET THERE!"

HoroHoro put his hands up as he tried to calm her down, a worried look on his face (more for his own safety than anything else). "I'm sure Ren and Pin-Mei are fine. I mean, Ren's smart enough to know when something's amiss. I bet they'll have taken care of her by the time we get there."

"I'm more worried about Pin-Mei. She's still so naive that she'll believe almost anything anyone tells her. Huan's a scheming witch, of that I'm sure, and if she tells Pin-Mei some lies in order to shake her up, she'll more than likely believe her."

"Even if that's true, we have to have faith and hold on until we get there." He wrapped his arms around her waist.

She sighed. "Get me some sleeping pills. Unless I'm knocked out for those twelve hours until we get there, I'm sure I'm going to spazz and make the plane to crash somehow."

* * *

_I know I don't have time for this, but this is important!_ Ren looked down at the small vial in his hands as he raced down the hall. _This little bottle could explain everything._

He opened a chamber and went in, closing the door behind him. Using a match, he lit the few torches in the small room. With the room lit, Ren turned to a massive cupboard against the back wall. An iron taijitu kept the doors locked, and he jammed a key into the bottom of it. A quick turn was enough to open it. It took a lot of power not to fling the doors open, but he managed.

Before him were shelves of small vials, each clearly labeled, noting their contents. Even just by looking at each one, he could list how they were used, what they did, and how much to give. As a child, he was schooled in this area relentlessly. After all, what kind of Tao would he be if he wasn't knowledgeable in his family's specialty?

He looked at the vial in his hand very closely trying to make out as much as he could from the faded label. "Alright…" he mumbled to himself. He scanned the shelves, stopping when one caught his eye. He snatched it and compared the bottles, then carefully took the stopper out and waved it in front of his face in order to smell it.

It had the same smell as the discarded container he had found. It was a nice smell, but he had jerked his head away because he had known what it was the moment his brain registered it.

Chloral Hydrate - a substance similar to Chloroform.

"It all makes sense now," he said aloud, putting the bottle back on the shelf. "Huan put this in Ren's drink. It would only take a small amount to knock him out cold for hours. That would explain why he was on his bed sleeping. But Lien…if the rape is a lie, then how why is she so convinced that it happened?"

Ren looked around the room, trying to find something that would give him a clue. Finally, he saw it.

A bottle was on the floor in the corner of the room, just barely visible with the torches' light. He walked over and picked it up. After he read the label, he had to fight the urge to throw it at the wall. Instead, he clenched his fist around it tightly.

"Scopolamine," he said through clenched teeth. "Huan must have overdosed her on this…Then Lien would start hallucinating, thinking she was raped. Huan was the one who made it look real." He seethed. "It takes a hell of a lot to make the person hallucinate. Any more, and Huan would have killed her!"

The bottle broke in his fist. He simply opened his hand over a bin in the corner and shook his hand to make the glass fall into it.

He stopped. "But how did Huan find the opportunity to inject so much of it into her? Lien's not stupid; she wouldn't just sit there and allow herself to be sedated like that…Wait…"

He rushed over to a greenhouse-esque case and opened it. He bent down and checked the leaves of one of the plants inside of it. Now he knew everything.

"The datura plant is missing its flower. That means that Huan must have crushed them and used the scent to knock Lien out – the perfect opportunity to inject her with the scopolamine." He stood and closed the door. "I never thought that my family's poisons would be used against us, especially to this extent. I believed that I had taken all the precautions necessary to keep them out of evil hands. Huan proved me wrong."

He left the room, locking it on his way out, and began to head back upstairs.

"If Huan used too much, Lien could become addicted to them. Those poisons are the same as those used in LSD, after all…" He spelled out the acronym in his mind. "Lysergic acid diethylamide…" Part of him wished the man who shared a similar name was there. Then he could pretend he was the actual drug and kick him around a little. Of course, he would never actually do that. "What an immature thing to think of."

But the thought of beating an innocent individual filled him with guilt. He remembered how he had tortured his oldest son, the heir to the family, the person he had always thought of as capable, fierce, yet possessing just the right amount of kindness.

_How can I even look at Ren now? I...I was wrong...and I almost killed him. _He covered his face with his hand. _And still, Pin-Mei says he didn't hesitate to get that blood for me._

It was a horrible feeling. Not only that he was wrong, but that he was going to have to submit to his son; that he was going to have to actually _admit_ that he had been wrong.

_I messed up_, he thought. _ Even though I hate to admit it, I messed up. I made a mistake. I was wrong…_

He kept repeating similar phrases, trying to get used to the fact that he has been hasty in his decision to name his son the culprit. He stopped, staring at the ground.

_All I can do is apologize. I can't take back all the pain I caused. I can't close all the wounds I opened. The only pitiful thing I can do is tell him that I'm sorry for what I did to him, that I now know he was innocent all along. Both he and Lien were victims in this._

"Milord?"

Ren looked up to see Sheng walking toward him. She looked confused. "I thought you left. Isn't it important that you join Lord Ren and Lady Lien as soon as possible?"

His eyes became hard again. "I found a vial in the stables. Thanks to Huan's carelessness, I now know everything."

"You do?"

He nodded. "Everything from the last week is a lie. Ren didn't do anything wrong."

"Then…who ravished Milady?"

"No one."

"W-What?"

Ren clenched his fist. "Lien was never raped. It was a hallucination created by Huan." He folded his arms. "I'm not quite certain how she made sure that Lien thought she was raped, since she could have imagined anything else, and the chance that she would think of rape of all things is minimal. But that's not important right now. What's important is that someone's been pulling our strings and turning us against each other. Someone more powerful than Huan." His eyes narrowed. "Above all else, I utterly despise being used."

Sheng looked up at him slowly. "Milord, if I may speak?"

He gave her an awkward face. "Go on…"

"While I agree with most of your theory, we mustn't forget that Milady was nearly violated a few weeks ago. From that stand point, her hallucinating that she was indeed raped isn't unnatural."

He turned his head in thought. "That's true…" He shook his head. "But that doesn't matter. Huan injected Lien with a dangerously high dose of scopolamine, which caused her mind to go awry in the first place. Getting revenge on the person who hurt my children and caused Pin-Mei and myself to turn against each other – that's the only thing I care about right now."

"Milord…"

He looked up. "But we don't have time for this. I've delayed my departure long enough. My children might need me, and I can't risk either of them getting hurt if the mastermind behind all this happens to be where Lien is."

Sheng bowed. "Please allow me to accompany you. I must redeem myself after my humiliating defeat against the traitor, Huan."

He nodded. "Alright. But don't dawdle. I promised Pin-Mei I'd bring them home.

"And I'll die before I break that promise."

* * *

"Lien!"

Ren watched helplessly as his sister fell into the mud. He stared for a moment, then ran over to her, taking her into his arms and shaking her. He was hoping to wake her before any nightmares could have the chance to torment her. Considering how hard it was to wake her up under normal circumstances, he knew this wouldn't be easy.

"Lien! LIEN! WAKE UP!"

"Save your strength. It's no use. Not even a Mack Truck could wake her up now."

Ren stiffened and slowly looked up to see Tadashi nonchalantly putting his hands in his pockets. He tried to give him a death glare with enough strength to intimidate him, but his former friend paid him no mind.

"Don't worry, I haven't killed her yet," Tadashi said calmly. "I guess you could compare her current condition to a coma. If you scream loud enough, you _might _be able to influence her dreams a _teeny tiny bit_. But anything else is useless. She won't wake up until I say so. I _do_ plan on waking her up, of course, you don't need to worry about that." He smirked. "I'll wake her up after she screams for a little while." He sighed as if he were love struck. "I can't wait. It's sure to be a most beautiful sound."

Ren left his sister's body and grabbed the demon's shoulders. "What do you want from us? Lien's not the girl from your past that you want revenge on, so why are you doing this to her? She's suffered enough! Didn't you willingly get the crap beaten out of you in order to protect her? Don't you feel _anything_ for her? I thought you **loved** her!"

"I _did_ love her," Tadashi said quietly. "I loved her so much it hurt." He closed his eyes. "But the hurt's become too much. Love made me blind. It made me obsessive. I forgot the pain and just concentrated on her. I gave her everything I had. She was all I ever thought about. But she didn't even give my love for her a chance. I can't live with the hurt anymore, Ren. Besides..." He opened his eyes again. "All of that was before I remembered who I really am and why I came here. I know better now. Your sister has made me suffer, just like...**she **did. Now, they're the same in my mind. I have to punish her. Unless she experiences the same pain of rejection and abandonment that I have, I can never be at peace."

Ren listened, digging his nails into Meihou's shoulders. When he was done speaking, the scion grit his teeth, then swung back and gave him a left hook that sent his classmate into the mud. He glared down at him.

"You bastard," he whispered in a dark voice. "You don't know anything about Lien, about the pain she's been through ever since we were little. You want to make her suffer 'like you have'?" He grabbed Tadashi by his collar and pulled him up, staring him straight in the eye. "She says she loves me more than anything. She says she wants to marry me. She says she wants to have children with me. But I'm going to have to reject her and break her innocent heart into a million little pieces." His eyes were suddenly filled with rage. "Don't worry, she'll be feeling your pain soon – without your help." He dropped him. "You're pathetic."

Tadashi stood up, his gray blazer and pants clean despite the mud. He brushed himself off. "Fine, then. But I think I'll let her stay like that for a little while longer. After all, I haven't heard those beautiful screams yet."

He shot the limp body a glare, his eyes flashing. Almost immediately, Lien began screaming and crying, grabbing at the mud near her.

"No...no...please...n-...not that...anything but that..." she murmured.

Ren flinched, then quickly turned to Tadashi.

"You bastard!" He swung back for another punch, but Tadashi caught his fist, holding one of his daggers at his attacker's neck.

"I really don't think that's smart," he said apathetically. "If you knock me out, then Lien will be trapped in her nightmares until I regain consciousness. You don't want that, do you?"

Reluctantly, Ren dropped his fist. His opponent sneered.

"Oh yes, not only are you soft when it comes to your mother, but you turn to mush when your darling sister is involved, as well. What fun." He gave him an uppercut and kicked him to the ground. Ren grabbed at the mud as Tadashi stood over him.

"That woman really _has_ ruined your family. Not only is your bloodline ruined, but you and your father have become weaklings with _feelings_. You actually _care_ about what happens to those around you. Even me." He laughed as Ren shook with anger. "That's right. I see Houraiken at your side. You could have stabbed me by now, killed me in a single blow, but you haven't. Why? Because you're against killing people, right? Your parents' foolish philosophy..."

Lien screamed again. Ren's head snapped up and he looked over at her. He bit his lip. Tadashi looked over at the distressed girl, then at the muddy scion before him.

"Seems like a wonderful nightmare she's having. Sounds like rape to me...just like I wanted."

Ren stood, his fists clenched. "Stop it! She doesn't deserve any of this!" His voice softened. "She...She still thinks I raped her...She's in enough pain as it is! Just please, stop this!"

Her screaming continued. "N-No!...Please...stop it! It...It hurts! Please...just STOP IT!"

Ren frantically looked back and forth between her and her tormentor, his eyes pleading for the screaming to end. He came to the conclusion that he didn't have any other choice than to swallow his pride. He grabbed Tadashi's shoulders again.

"Please! Stop it!" he cried. "I...I'm begging you...I can't stand to see her suffer anymore."

Tadashi scoffed at him. "What makes you think I'll say, 'Oh, of course!' when you keep repeating the same things over and over again?"

"Please..." The proud heir fell to his knees. "I'm begging you...I...I'll do anything..."

At this, the traitor cocked an eyebrow. "Really, now? You'll do anything if I stop Lien's nightmares?"

"I...I..." _What am I saying...?_ "Yes! Just don't hurt her anymore!" _This is for Lien's sake. Any humiliation or pain I have to go through in order to save her is my duty as her brother._

"Alright, Ren, I have something you can do," Tadashi said with a smirk.

The dog scrambled to its feet. "What is it? Tell me!"

Tadashi just smiled at him, then reached his hand out to him, like a prince asking for a dance.

"Pledge your loyalty to Hao-sama.

In other words...**join us**."


	79. A Warm Welcome

Okay, I really have to say something, because I never did before, and it's about time I did. I want to thank all the people who have reviewed this fic, whether you still do, or you stopped, or if you ever just thought about it and never got around to it. Seriously, _**thank you**_. I'm thankful for each and every review I get. I want to reply to them all, but sometimes I just don't know what to say. It would be a little impersonal to just say "Thanks for reading!" every time, right? But even if I don't reply, I do pay attention to what you say. Heck, Rong wouldn't even be alive unless one reviewer had spoken up and said they liked her. So, no matter what you say, good or bad, I love hearing it. I actually **like** being told I'm doing something wrong, which has happened, and I've happily gone and changed it. Even the ones that just say "Good job!" or "Yay!" or "Update!" mean a lot to me. All of them do. Thank you to everyone who's reviewed up to this point; for taking the time to, since I know you don't have to. Reviews are a privilege, not a right, and I feel very privileged to have readers like all of you.

And to those who have added this story to your favorites and/or alerts, thank you as well. That means just as much to me as the reviews. I'm not exactly sure how many stories can fit into each slot, but I don't think it's unlimited, so I'm honored that some of you have added me to your lists (I would be even if it **was** unlimited).

Really, I appreciate everything you do when it comes to this fic. I'm really sorry and rather embarrassed that I haven't said anything at length about this sooner. I look forward to finishing this story and hopefully giving you an ending everyone can be happy with.

Oh, and the short story I did for one of my finals is on my deviantart account. I ended up having to use Ren and Pin-Mei because the story was due in about 12 hours, and I still hadn't started any of the ten pages I was supposed to be writing. It made it easier, at least. I don't think it counts as fanfiction, so that's why I didn't post it here.

**Notes: Yukari Tamura is the voice I've chosen for Xue, due to her incredible range and ability to go from childish to serious almost instantly. She has played Rika Furude in Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, Mai Kawasumi in Kanon, and Mei Sunohara in Clannad, just to name a few. I chose Kappei Yamaguchi to play Seta, who is best known as Shinichi Kudo from Detective Conan.**

**In Japan, girls will sometimes refer to themselves in third person in order to sound childish or cute.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Seventy-Nine: A Warm Welcome**

* * *

Ren stared at him, his eyes wide.

"J...Join you?"

"That's right," Tadashi said with a nod, his arm still outstretched. "Hao-sama wants you to join him and lend him your power to help create a new world...Just for shamans."

"Just for shamans..." Ren whispered.

"That's right. No humans to persecute you or harass you for being true to your family's heritage and tradition. That incident with Suōshǐ? Nothing like that would ever happen again. Lien would be safe from all that. Ren, she could be truly happy in Hao-sama's world."

Ren looked away. "No. I won't let you pin me like this. My father and HoroHoro and Yoh and everyone else sacrificed so much in order to defeat Hao and save humanity. I won't make that all be for nothing. I won't forget their pain and suffering. I refuse to." He cringed as another scream came from his twin.

"So, you'd rather listen to your only sister scream in terror?"

He squeezed his eyes shut. "She would want that. She wouldn't ignore what our father did."

"Nii...Niisama...help me...it hurts so much..."

He turned to her. "HOLD ON, LIEN! I'LL FIGURE SOMETHING OUT!" he yelled as loud as he could, hoping she would hear him.

She twitched. "O...kay..." Slowly, she wrapped her arms around her body, embracing herself, presumably as a comfort mechanism.

Tadashi raised his eyebrows. "Huh! How about that! She heard you!" He gave a few mocking claps, then smirked again. "You know, with just one glance, I can make her dream whatever I want."

Ren glared at him. "You mean you can torment her as much as you like!"

He shook his head. "No. I can weave pleasant dreams as well. Success, love, fame, passion, happiness...I can make her dreams come true, Ren. I can fulfill any wish she has. Once she's under my spell, I can do anything I want to her.

"Wouldn't you like her to dream of her art being treated like masterpieces? Being displayed in museums and earning the respect and admiration of people around the world? What about being popular at school? Having a crowd of people around her desk each morning, offering to hang out with her? Wouldn't you like her to be happy?...To dream of you loving her like she wants?"

Ren looked away from him, guilt apparent on his face.

"Tada-Darling," Suo called over. "It's still a bit rainy out here, so I'm going back under the umbrella. Let me know when you're done."

Her 'son' turned to her. "Alright, Kaasan. Feel free to take a nap. I'll try to get this over with soon."

Ren stared at them. "You know she isn't your real mother."

Tadashi turned back to him. "Believe what you want. She's all I need in a mother. Just like I thought Lien was all I needed in a wife." He gave a low chuckle. "Her happiness is in my hands, Ren. And despite how touching it is that she's dreaming of you..."

He glanced at her once more as his eyes flashed. Her body tensed, then started shaking.

"What...what are you doing...no...not again...no, please don't..."

Ren snapped his head over to glare at him. "You bastard...playing with her like that!" He raised a fist, but Tadashi shook a finger at him.

"Uh-uh-uh...I don't advise that, Ren. I'm prone to concussions, and who knows what will happen to Lien during that time?"

Reluctantly, he obeyed, choosing to instead glare at him with angry yellow eyes. "You said you loved her, but if you had ever truly cared about her, you wouldn't be causing her so much pain!"

Tadashi chortled with a knowing grin. "I may have _started_ the pain, but you can _end_ it. All you have to do..." He stretched out his arm again. "...is take my hand. It really is that simple."

Ren shut his eyes as the war of conflicting feelings raged on inside him. This had to be the worst night of his life. Never before had he felt so confused, so unsure, so...weak.

Finally, he looked up at him. "You mean it? The minute I agree, you'll free Lien?"

"Of course," the pusher said with a fleer. "I'm a man of my word. The absolute second you agree and take my hand, she'll wake up. Of course, when you do that, you'll immediately become a loyal servant of Hao-sama. His will becomes yours. Your powers are to his benefit. Not a single thought of betrayal will enter your mind. You will give your life in order to fulfill his noble wish of wanting to create an Eden for shamans. In return for your services, you will gain immeasurable power. You'll learn more than that outdated Chou Senji Ryakketsu could ever teach you; enough to surpass even your father."

"And what about my family?"

Tadashi smiled. "With you out of the way, I'll take care of Lien and bring her happiness, that I can promise. I'll take care of her until she dies. What happens to the rest of your family depends on how well they cooperate with Hao-sama."

Ren's fists clenched. If he wanted to save Lien, he would have to become a pawn of the very demon his father loathed. He, himself, would gain nothing that would benefit him in the way he liked.

_Maybe I can get him to rethink his loyalty to Hao._ It was a long shot, but he was desperate. "Why did you join him, Tadashi? What's in it for you? How are you benefiting from anything by giving up your free will to someone who only sees you as his tool?"

The tool smirked. "What am I gaining? I thought it was obvious." He held up his hand, making it into a fist. "I have more power than I know what to do with. I finally have a mother figure I can look up to. He was kind enough to allow me to live here with you and Lien for as long as I did, allowed me to feel love and happiness again. Most of all, he's given me a second chance. He's allowing me to fulfill my selfish wish to get revenge.

"He knows our pain, Ren. He knows what it's like to be scorned and despised by humans. Even to me, he can pity and show sympathy. He knows what it's like growing up without a mother. Your family can't see it, but Hao-sama is our savior."

"All of that is in your mind. He's a master in that he can make you believe almost anything he says," Ren said in a low voice. "Once you're no longer deemed useful to him, he'll kill you, leave your body to rot in a ditch somewhere without so much as a proper burial."

"I have confidence that if he killed me, he would be respectful enough to cremate my corpse."

"You're so blind!"

"At least I'm not a foolish idiot like you. Personally, I can't understand why you wouldn't want to side with Hao-sama. I mean, you've been told all about his background and such, right?"

"What are you getting at?"

"He's a twin, just like you, Ren. The eldest of the two, no less. Don't you feel a connection to him? He can feel for you, as well."

"He knows **nothing** about being an older brother, what a big responsibility it is on top of being the heir to such a powerful family. Hao threw those things away when he chose the path of death and destruction."

"But he also chose power, right? I think that in this corrupt world, power is all that matters."

Ren stared at the ground. That conversation had gotten him nowhere. His friend was utterly committed to Hao's cause, as if he honestly believed in it. He was back where he started; his dilemma was still there. He still had to choose between betraying his family or continuing to allow his sister to be tormented by a chimerical hell.

"This is a limited time offer, Ren. If you don't accept, I can't guarantee that Lien's nightmares won't get worse." Even just by shifting his eyes, he instantly made the nightmare become intense.

Ren wanted to cover his ears as his sister let out more blood curdling screams at the boorish, lustfully evil version of himself. Her cries were becoming more than he could bear. Once the screams dropped in volume, Tadashi reached out to him once again.

"It doesn't seem like she'll last much longer. She may lose her sanity soon if those nightmares don't subside. It's your decision."

Ren swore he could feel his own sanity slipping away. Now, it seemed as though he had to make his decision. He closed his eyes.

_Father...I've stalled as long as I could. I was hoping you would be here by now to help us. I'm sorry. But I can't watch Lien suffer anymore. Hopefully, you'll arrive soon so you can kill me before Hao makes me do anything destructive._

Tadashi moved his hand to prod him. "Well?"

Ren was seemingly kicking at the ground, a pile of mud forming at his feet. The dealer squinted his eyes at it. Was this an action of deep thought?

"Ten seconds to decide..."

Ren looked up. _My life ends here._

"Three seconds..."

He lifted his hand. "I acc-"

"T...Tadashi...kun..."

The two boys froze, Ren's hand mere inches above Tadashi's. But Meihou dropped his hand, his eyes wide with surprise. He walked over and knelt down next to Lien's body. She was sobbing, still murmuring to herself.

"Please...help me...I...I need you..."

He looked nervous for a moment, then scoffed at her. "What an idiot. It's like she doesn't remember that I'm the one who put her in that state." He stood up and turned away from her.

"You...promised you would hold me...and let me cry if I needed to...You promised to pick up the pieces...You promised..."

Tadashi's eyes were wide as he stared at the ground. He obviously hadn't expected to have a role in her dreams, especially not to be called out to for help. He was the enemy now. He wasn't the same person who had offered that help. She couldn't count on him to comfort her anymore.

_I don't understand! How can she still want me when I've betrayed her? Is she really __that__ stupid?_

"See how much you meant to her?"

Tadashi looked up see Ren staring at him with hardened eyes.

"Even though you've hurt her so much, she still believes that the real you is in there."

He began to look agitated. "You're wrong! You're both wrong! THIS IS THE REAL ME! This is who I was supposed to come here as! Not as some hopeless romantic who saw himself as some Prince Charming or a knight in shining armor!"

"But that doesn't mean that the real you is this angry, vengeful person," Ren said as he took a step forward. "I think Hao distilled that in you. I think you really ARE that heroic prince that did his best to treat the girl he cared about like a princess. As disgusting as I initially felt about it, Lien was happy when you were like that. You hear me? SHE WAS HAPPY WITH THE WAY YOU WERE!"

"No! You're wrong! You don't know anything about what I was like before I met you and Lien! YOU'RE WRONG!"

"Am I? Then where did that personality come from? I understand that this past girlfriend of yours may have treated you badly, but she must have been initially attracted to your personality. I think that personality is the one Lien and I saw."

The boy shook his head furiously, then stomped his foot. "NO! STOP IT! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!"

Ren shrugged. "I may not know what it's like to have my heart broken, but I'm confident about one thing."

Tadashi looked up at him nervously.

"If you had waited until after I turned Lien down, I know she would have eventually returned your feelings. I guarantee that by the time her hair had grown back, she would have told you she loved you."

"Sh...shut up...You don't know that for sure!"

Ren grinned. "She's my sister. My twin. I know everything about her. More than my parents do. More than she herself knows sometimes. I'm confident in what I'm saying."

Tadashi wrapped his arms around his head, covering his ears. "Just SHUT UP! You're trying to trick me!"

Ren shrugged again. "I'd say 'Ask her yourself,' but after this, she may not respond the same way. Even though the other person who wants her affection is my best friend, I can't choose for her. I honestly think she could have learned to love you, Tadashi, if you had just waited."

"That's...That's...NO! I'm not letting you trick me!"

"_If I could...I'd love you with all my heart and soul and make your loneliness go away..."_

He froze. That was what she had said to him, even after he had made the mistake of reminding her of what Suōshǐ had tried to do to her. Was that the truth? Had she meant that?

He let his arms drop and hang at his sides as he slowly looked over at Lien. Ren followed his gaze.

She had stopped squirming around, now seemingly in a peaceful slumber. Tadashi turned away for a few moments, seemingly thinking. He looked at the girl from over his shoulder, his eyes sad.

After glancing at him, Ren turned his attention back to his sister. Sure enough, her eyes opened, and she slowly sat up.

"Eww...I got mud in my mouth..." she whined, sticking her tongue out. She blinked as her brother ran over and knelt down next to her, hugging her close to him. "Niisama? What's this for?"

"It's nothing," he whispered. "Don't worry about it."

"I...I had a dream..."

"Forget about it...it wasn't real, so it can't hurt you..."

"No, it wasn't that. It was a good dream."

He stopped. "A...good dream?"

She nodded. "Yeah. I dreamed that we were sitting on a blanket, for a picnic, then Seta and Xue came...and Tadashi came, too. We were all smiling and laughing. Tadashi fit right in, like he'd known Xue and Seta for years. It made me so happy." She looked up, her smile fading as she saw him before her. "Tadashi…"

Ren shook his head, telling her before she asked that no, he still wasn't the knight she knew. Lien bowed her head, biting her lip in an attempt to control her emotions.

"That name…"

She looked up at Tadashi again. "What?"

He stood mere feet from her with crazed eyes and bleeding fists. "That name…I hate hearing it."

She clutched her brother's arm. "W-Which one?"

Ren pulled her up and moved her behind him. "I think he's finally snapped." _Dammit…I thought I was finally getting through to him. What the hell did Lien say that got to him so much?_ He took a step back, only to have the disturbed youth take a step closer.

"Don't ever say it again…" he said in a dark voice.

"But what is it? What did I say?"

Ren pushed her back as Tadashi slowly raised a red glowing fist above his head.

"Now's REALLY not the time, Lien!"

"I'll kill her, I swear it. I'll make sure she and her family suffer for what she did to me…" He opened the fist, his fingers bent almost like claws. A small flame appeared in it before he clenched it closed again.

Ren picked up his sister, holding her sideways in his arms. "This is REALLY bad."

"WITH HAO-SAMA'S POWER, I'LL CRUSH THEM ALL AND SEND THEM TO THE BURNING DEPTHS OF HELL!"

He swung the fist around as if he were holding a whip. Fire left his hands and flew to the outskirts of the clearing, trapping them inside.

Tadashi had a maniacal grin on his face. "See, Ren? I wasn't lying when I said I have more power than I know what to do with. It was a gift from Hao-sama – are you jealous?"

"You wish, you crazy bastard."

He frowned, then swiftly appeared in front of them. Before Ren could do anything, he was given a swift backhand to the cheek and sent to the ground, dropping Lien in the process. He had to prevent from howling as he held the cheek in pain.

"You feel that? It feels as if I just slapped you with a hot iron, ne? That's just one of the abilities Hao-sama bestowed upon me," he said with a sneered. "Don't worry, you'll get to see them all before I decide to kill you." He laughed.

"Niisama!" Lien cried as she got up to run to her brother, but she was grabbed by her hair and pulled back. She let out a cry, her eyes suddenly becoming frantic.

"Still too long, eh Lien?" he chortled in her ear. Her body was shaking uncontrollably, fearing a repeat of the events from the last time her hair pulled. "You're so easy. Easy to trick, easy to scare...easy to excite…" He used two fingers to trace her spine up towards her neck.

When his fingertips ran over the strap hidden under her shirt, she went completely stiff for a moment. Without warning, she let out a small scream and backfisted his nose. Tadashi clasped his hands over it, letting go of her, and she wasted no time in running to her brother. Ren slowly stood up, holding his cheek until Lien threw her arms around him. As he comforted her, he gave Tadashi a death glare.

"And here I thought Hao would teach you more honorable ways of tormenting people than that. You're disgusting."

The minion shrugged. "He taught me to play on people's fears. All I did was run a couple fingers up her back. The rest was her own doing." A smile of malicious satisfaction was on his face. "I guess I should be thanking Suōshǐ and his gang of flunkies. Because of them, I have plenty of ammunition to take Lien down with. Of course, Ren, if you just pledge your loyalty to Hao-sama, Lien will absolutely, without a doubt, be spared."

Ren shook his head. "Not a chance in hell. Hao would never spare anyone unless he knew he could use them, and I won't let him use my sister so he can realize his sick ideals. I can protect her myself."

Tadashi frowned. "Suit yourself. Just don't say I didn't give you a chance to save yourselves."

Ren looked behind him as he felt the barrier of fire die down. He looked at his former friend, who was now smirking.

"I feel like playing a game," the boy said, amusing himself by watching the sparks that flew every time he snapped his fingers. He finally looked up at them. "I've changed the location of the firewall so you can run around the trees like the vermin that you are. I'll give you some time to hide and come up with a plan, but not too long. Then I'll come find you. Whoever doesn't die wins. Sound like fun?"

_Like a fucking barrel of monkeys_, Ren thought. He looked down at Lien, who had attached herself to his arm, still shaking. He looked around. _I have to get Lien out of here._

"Oh, I hope those horses weren't expensive, because I accidentally made them the guideline for the barrier. They're kind of dead now."

_Well, there goes that plan._

"Go on, run into the woods like scared little mice. I'll come find you soon enough." He flopped a hand in front of him, fingertips pointed at the ground, and waved them off. "Go have fun, you two. Go on." When they didn't move, he turned his hand palm up, a small fire engulfing it. "I know what you need..."

_Damn it..._

"You two just need a little motivation, that's all!" He pulled back and pitched the fireball at them.

Ren grabbed his sister and hit the ground, allowing the fiery attack to whiz above them. Once he knew they had cleared it, He hurried to his feet, taking Lien and shoving her in front of him.

"Run!" he commanded. She nodded and dashed into the woods, refusing to let go of his hand. There were times when she would slow down, only to have him urge her on.

Ren soon looked over her head and saw a large rock. Per his instructions, Lien stopped there, bending over and touching her knees as she desperately tried to catch her breath. Of course, being so worked up didn't help. She whimpered and crouched down, hugging her knees and wiping her eyes.

"Why is Tadashi doing this, Niisama?"

He lowered his head. "I don't know. But we can't hold back against him, Lien. We'll die if we do."

She looked over her shoulder at him. "What does that mean?"

"I may have to kill him if we all want to survive."

Her eyes widened as she quickly stood and began pounding his chest. "NO! Please don't, Niisama! Please don't! He's not himself! The real Tadashi wouldn't do this to us! We can't just kill him – then we'll never see the real one ever again if we do that!"

Her brother's wet bangs were covering his eyes. "Father never went into detail about Hao with you, did he?"

She stopped, becoming hesitant. "He...told me that he was evil, and related to Yoh...and that if he hadn't helped kill him, we probably wouldn't be here."

Her brother scoffed at her words. "He really has gone soft, using such a vague description..."

She looked uneasy. "W-Why? What's he really like?"

Ren looked at the ground. "He's the type of person who finds Hell 'boring'. Someone who can pretend to have empathy for others, but ultimately only cares about himself. He has no respect for human lives; killing means nothing to him. As long as he gets what he wants, he doesn't care about the methods. Even…Father admitted that there were times when he was afraid, though he never made it apparent to anyone else." He looked up at her. "He had a massive amount of furyoku, Lien. And if he were to be resurrected now, I'm not sure if we'd be able to defeat him."

"But what about Papa? Can't he-?"

"I meant even with Father. We'd have to round up all five of the elemental spirits to have a chance."

Her eyes widened in horror. The prospect that there was someone who her father couldn't beat was unfathomable. All she could do was sit against the rock and stare at the ground. Her twin soon joined her, and there was silence.

"Oh Tao twiiiiiiiiiins! Where arrrrrrrrrrrre yoooooou?"

They both tensed. Tadashi had already started his hunt, and they were still without a plan.

"What are we going to do, Niisama?" she whispered frantically, shaking his arm.

Ren just stared at the ground for a few more moments. Then, he reached into his pants and pulled out an Ace bandage. She blinked at it curiously.

"Niisama? What's that fo—"

"Take off your shirt."

She recoiled, crossing her arms over her torso. "W-WHAT? N-Niisama, how can you think about that right now?.!"

He frowned at her. "How can YOU think of that?" He held up the bandage. "I'm going to bind your chest."

She blinked at him. "W-Why are you going to do that?"

"We're going to use our appearance to our advantage. It's dark, so he won't be able to tell the minor details between us."

"Minor…meaning you have pieces that I don't?"

"I'm serious. He won't be able to discriminate who's who unless we stand beside each other. Trust me on this. We don't have many other choices here. This might be our best bet. If we can just incapacitate him, I bet the firewall will disappear, and we can escape. I know you don't feel comfortable doing this, but I wouldn't ask you to unless I believed that it was necessary for the both of us to survive."

She looked away from him, her face red. "But I…I don't want you to see me…"

He sighed in frustration. "Listen, take it off or I'm ripping it off. I'm not going to let either of us die because you're self-conscious. I can hardly see you anyway."

"Still, can I do it myself?"

"No. You won't be able to tighten it enough for it to make a noticeable difference since you'd be doing it on your own body, so I have to do it." His eyes softened. "I won't touch you or do anything other than put the bandage around you. I promise. I won't hurt you."

She looked fearful, then slowly lowered her arms. "Just do it quickly," she said softly.

"Hn, not like I have a choice."

"Olly olly oxen free!"

Lien froze, looking in the direction of the voice, then at her brother. She quickly turned and began undoing the fasteners that kept her white top closed, folding it and placing it on her lap. No sooner had she unhooked her brassiere was Ren in front of her, slipping the bandage under the nylon fabric so it could cover her before he had the chance to see anything. He threw it off when it impeded his operation, and she was slightly stunned by how fast and artful his hands were as he moved it behind her neck every so often like a halter. He finally tugged on it, tightening it before settling the strap on her waist.

"Can you breathe well?" he asked. She nodded, and he pinned it in place. Then he produced some medical tape and taped it to her skin in order to make sure it wouldn't come undone. "There, that should do for now."

She touched her chest, amazed by how well her curves were hidden. "How did you know to put it behind my neck?"

"Sheng walked into the bathroom once while I was getting ready, probably about to take a shower, since her shirt was already off. I found out then."

"I never heard about this…"

"I think she was too embarrassed, since she apologized and then quietly left."

"Come out, come out, wherever you are!"

The twins looked at each other again.

"Are you ready, Lien?"

She hesitated, then lunged and hugged him. "I'm scared," she whispered.

He wrapped his arms around her, patting her head. "We're not going to die in this place. We're going to die many, many years from now, surrounded by our children and grandchildren. Father will be here soon and make short work of Suo, then maybe we can try to save Tadashi."

She blinked at him. "Suo?"

"Our not-so-great grandmother; the one Tadashi thinks is his mother."

"Mama never talked about her..."

"She has her reasons. Suo is someone Mother killed a long time ago, before either of us were born. We have to stay away from her. She's more dangerous than Tadashi." He grabbed her shoulders. "Promise me that if she says ANYTHING to you, you won't listen to her, okay? Whatever she says, she's lying." Lien nodded dumbly. He let go of her shoulders and grasped her hand. "Let's go."

He pulled her to the right, going around the clearing in an attempt to get behind their foe. Lien crouched in the bushes as Ren peered through the leaves. He was glad that his tongari had been felled by the rain, seeing as how he now didn't have to worry about it giving away their position in a _Jaws_-like fashion.

_Where is he?_ He turned to his sister. "I'm going to take Bason and sneak around to that side." He pointed across the clearing. "When I give the signal, I want you to charge in using the seventh form, alright?"

She looked petrified. "But I…I can't do this on my own…"

He gave her left cheek a harsh tap. "Get a hold of yourself. If anything goes wrong, I'll rush in with Bason and save you. Tadashi won't be able to compete with an over soul."

Her eyes lowered. "I don't want him to get hurt."

"I don't want _you_ to get hurt. I'm not concerned about Tadashi right now. All that matters to me is staying alive and getting out of here. For now, trust me and just do what I tell you. You have to put some faith in this, Lien, or we're not going to succeed. Just trust me, okay?"

She stared at him, as if to say, "…After what you did?" Despite this, she nodded.

"Thank you. Now, just stay here."

He got up and started creeping away. She watched him go around the edge of the clearing, hidden by trees and bushes until he was opposite her. Their eyes met, and he nodded at her, then mouthed, "Wait." Lien nodded, shivering. It was only sprinkling now, hence why Tadashi's fire was able to keep itself from burning out.

Finally, Tadashi emerged from behind the trees, disgruntled. "Darn...Where'd they go? I wasn't planning on looking for them this much."

Ren looked at his spirit out of the corner of his eye. "Alright, Bason - Hyoi Gattai." He kept his weapon low, trying to prevent the shine from being noticeable.

Tadashi spit at the ground. "This sucks...Hm?" He looked up to see a shadow in the air, quickly descending toward him. He leaped out of the way as Ren's oversouled Kwan Dao stabbed the ground. He grinned, thrilled that his prey had come out of hiding. "Wohoho! Looks like somebody's about to get serious!"

Ren silently looked past him at his sister, who slowly nodded. He suddenly vanished from Tadashi's sight. The boy turned, only to get a kick in the jaw that knocked him to the ground. He slowly got up, wiping the mud from his face.

"You're a fast one aren't you, Ren?" he murmured, an annoyed smile on his lips. Yellow eyes appeared in front of him just as a blade cut across his chest. Before he could retaliate, his head was trapped between a pair of legs, then hurled him forward, slamming him face-down in the mud.

Lien clutched the Kwan Dao tightly as she inched over to her brother, who was in the middle of standing up after his attack. They stood still for a moment, but when Tadashi's body started moving again, Ren took the weapon and motioned for her to hide so they could continue their assault.

"Don't bother sending her away, Ren. I know it's the both of you."

The twins tensed as he slowly stood. When he looked up at them, his red eyes were practically glowing. He grinned at them.

"It seems the two of you want to play a little. Hide and seek wasn't good enough for you, eh? You want a more exciting game? Don't worry, I have one. I vote we play a little 'matanage'."

Ren could feel Lien's eyes watching him in confusion. She obviously didn't know what he was talking about. He readied himself.

"Dodgeball? What are you – seven?"

Tadashi ignored him. "I'll be the Oni first." He opened his right hand, a ball of fire appearing in it. "Game on," he said with a sneer before pitching spherical flame at the young scion.

Ren hopped to the right, avoiding it. But when his opponent's devilish grin didn't diminish, he slowly looked over his shoulder just before the attack struck him in the back. He let out a hoarse cry as he fell to the ground, twitching in pain. He gasped and flipped himself onto his back, allowing it to touch the mud.

"Niisama!"

Tadashi snapped his head over to the bushes, readying another ball. "Oh, Lien...Come out, sweetheart, and join the fun." He tossed it at her hiding place, watching the leaves disintegrate. His smile faded. "Where'd she go?"

Some mud was flung at him, hitting his eyes and blinding him. Lien ran and leaped at him, landing a hard kick to his solars. The blow sent him onto his back, and she used the opportunity to do some rapid stomps on his midsection before bouncing off and running to her brother. Ren used his Kwan Dao to pull himself up as she approached him.

"Niisama, is your back okay?" she asked fearfully.

"I'm fine," he replied in a gruff voice. "The mud was able to cool it off a little."

She glanced at his back, the glow from his oversoul allowing her to faintly see the welts that were developing. _I wish Mama were here so she could heal Niisama. Even if he won't admit it, I can still tell it hurts._

"Damn twins..."

They looked to see Tadashi standing up, seething with anger. The mud melted off his blazer as he wiped some off his face, shaking his hand to quickly rid himself of the grimy substance. He glared at them, his eyes glowing.

"So that's how you wanna play, huh?" he said darkly. "Well, then, I won't hold back against you parasites anymore. I can't have you beating me in front of Kaasan. And to think I was going to spare you, Lien. Now you can die like the bitch you are along with your brother." He laughed as flames formed in his hands. They traveled up his arms and engulfed his body, making it impossible for the twins to see him.

Lien's eyes widened. "Tadashi!" She tried to run to him, but Ren held her back.

"Don't. He's not playing around anymore, Lien. If you get in his way now, he'll kill you."

She shook herself from his grasp. "No he won't! Tadashi's in there – I know it!" She defiantly ran toward the growing flame, hope in her eyes. "Tadashi! Are you in there? Tada-!"

A hand reached out from within the fire and backhanded her into the mud. Ren grit his teeth as the flames seemed to be carried away by the wind, exposing the cursed boy to him.

Tadashi looked at a puddle as lightning flashed, his reflection staring back at him. "So this is what I would have looked like," he said quietly. He opened his hand. The flames that came from it were brighter than before; so hot that Ren swore he could feel them from how far away he was. But he couldn't allow it to phase him.

"You bastard...Don't you dare touch my sister like that!" the heir yelled at him. He readied his Kwan Dao and charged at him.

Tadashi gently blew on the small inferno in his hand. The blaze flew toward the scion, swirling around him before subduing him, leaving him to taste the ground once again. Slushing sounds could be heard from behind him, and Tadashi smirked as a flared barrier appeared, preventing Lien from executing another surprise attack. He quickly grabbed her by the neck and pulled her in front of him. She defiantly tried to shake free from him, but her efforts proved useless.

"Well, well, well...What's this? Have I caught a little Tao in my grasp? Aww, how horribly cute." He sneered at her, bringing his face close to hers.

It wasn't until then that noticed how different he looked. His baby face had given way to a more mature one. He had grown a few inches. He didn't look like he belonged in a high school classroom.

"Tadashi? What happened to you?"

He pulled away, laughing. "Thanks to Hao-sama, I can have the body I would've had if I were still alive."

Her eyes widened. "Still alive...? B-But you **are** alive! You can talk to me, you can hear me, you...you even kissed me! You ARE alive!"

He scoffed at her. "I mean if I had been living up until now. If I hadn't lost those precious years of my life thanks to **her**." He grinned, then touched her chin. "I quite like it. Do you? Do I turn you on, Lien? How does it make you feel to know that someone five years older than you is intrigued by you, hm?"

Without waiting for a reply, he kissed her. Her eyes widened again, almost happily, but then the light they possessed faded away. She was like a drone once again.

"Dammit, Tadashi! What did you do to her?" Ren cried, trying to get up.

The man blew on his finger, sending small rings of fire at him. Ren's limbs were bound to the ground. When he struggled, his wrists and ankles were burned by the charring shackles.

"That's better. Now, just be quiet. I have some business with Lien. I still need her to bring back Hao-sama, you know," Tadashi said calmly.

"What the hell do you need her for?"

"Oh, you'll see, you'll see." He turned back to the doll in his arms. "That's right, you need to finish your prayer, Lien. The parts you chanted before you were so rudely interrupted freed some of Hao-sama's power. Soon, he'll be able to break free of the prison the Great Spirits put him in after trying to lure your mother all those years ago. But you'll help me, won't you, Lien?"

She leaned against him, a brainwashed smile on her face. "Of course, Tadashi..."

He cocked his head at her in a teasing fashion. "Tadashi...?"

"...kun...Tadashi-kun..." she whispered.

He smirked. "That's right." He looked up at Ren. "You know, there's just something about her I can't ignore, Ren. I can't understand why you wouldn't just accept her feelings. She's so adorable when she's my little doll, don't you think?"

Ren just glared at him, helpless to save his twin.

"Don't worry. Despite what I said, I've decided to spare her. I just can't let go of the cute little virgin." He stroked her hair, a devilish look in his eyes. "Don't worry, I'll take good care of her. She'll forget all about you and your family." When Ren didn't reply, he looked down at young heiress. "Well, then. No use in wasting time. Lien, why don't you go back over there and-"

"HELLOOOOOOOOO!"

Ren saw Tadashi tense, his eyes becoming small.

"Hola! Bonjour! Guten tag! Szervusz! Konnichiwa! Nihaooooo!"

He turned slowly as skipping could be heard from the edge of the woods.

"And now, the moment you've been waiting for-"

His eyes hardened.

"Usui Xue is here! Yay!"

Xue jumped, making a victory sign with her fingers. She giggled, then pouted when no one seemed particularly happy to see her.

"What's up with you guys? Xue came all the way to see you, and you can't even say hello," she said in a hurt voice. She looked around, then her face lit up. "OhEmGees! Tadashi! Xue hasn't seen you in, like, forever! OhmygoshOhmygoshOhmygosh!"

He forced a smile at her. "Yeah. Four years."

"Xue was so sad when you moved away! Xue missed you so much! Xue tried to send you letters, but you never wrote back!" she cried.

The smile broke. Tadashi eyed her with rage. "Moved away?"

She nodded. "Yeah-huh! Mommy and Daddy said that you moved away without telling Xue where you were going." She smiled. "But you're here now! Now we can be friends again! Yay!"

She giggled and ran to him, most likely for a glomp. Tadashi released Lien, telling her to stay there, and opened his arms to receive her.

When she was close enough, he landed a swift kick to her stomach, sending her backwards, near where Ren was. She lay on the ground for a few moments, motionless, before sitting up. She was silent.

Ren stared at her. _What the hell is she doing here? And how do they even know each other?_

He heard a few sniffles. Xue whimpered, then began bawling like a toddler that had just bumped its head on a table. Tadashi just stared at her, seemingly dumbfounded.

"Th-That was mean! Why did you kick Xue like that? What did Xue do?" she howled.

Tadashi's rage returned. He marched over to her, his eyes fierce. Ren fidgeted, then winced in pain from his bindings.

"Tadashi, leave her alone. She has nothing to do with this! She's too naïve to know what's going on!"

The minion glared at him, then kicked mud in his face. "Shut up, rapist. You have no idea just how involved this bitch is in all of this."

Xue was covering her ears. "Grown-up words! Xue can't hear them! Lalala..."

Tadashi turned to her and punched her nose, then grabbed her blue bangs, using them to yank her head back as he knelt down to her level. She whimpered again.

"Owwww! You're hurting Xue!"

He seethed, yanking her head back again. "You think this is a game, you little whore? You honestly think you can act like a toddler, saying your name over and over again? I bet you think you're cute, don't you?"

She opened one eye to look at him. "Daddy says Xue's very cute..."

"Cut the shit, Xue! I know this is just an act! You know what happened four years ago! What you did to me!" he yelled.

She was shaking. "W-What did Xue do? Did Xue make Tadashi leave? Is that why you never played with Xue again?"

"Why you little-!"

"It's not an act, Tadashi."

Tadashi stopped, then looked at Ren. "What do you mean? She was never like this when I was with her!"

"She suddenly started acting like this a few years ago. I can't remember when exactly, or why," Ren continued. "Her parents were stunned. We all were. This is who Xue is now. She's like a naïve five year-old. She honestly doesn't understand why you're so angry."

Furious, Tadashi looked at Xue. "So, you've forgotten all of it, hm? Forgotten what you did to me? Forgotten all ways you made me suffer?"

The girl was still crying. "Xu-Xue's really sorry...Please don't be mad...Xue missed you so much!"

Her attacker spit in her face. "You're such a miserable, pathetic wretch. No matter." He released her hair, his hand sliding down to cover her eyes. "I'll just make you remember it all."

* * *

**June 14, 2021**

* * *

"...And so then she says, 'I think we should go get promise rings to prove how much we love each other!' Give me a break. I dumped her the next day."

The circle of boys laughed.

"God, Zegen. That girl didn't last long. What was that, a week?"

"Yeah. I have to move on. Set my sights on a new girl."

"Did you at least have sex with her?"

"'Course I did. Girls these days are so easy. Just a promise that you'll always be there for them, and they become your lap dog."

There was a sigh. The three boys, Zegen, Himo, and Gyuu, looked down the table to see Tadashi poking at his rice. They looked at each other, then at him.

"Dude, Tadashi, why don't you take the floor and tell us about the girl you were with a few days ago?" Gyuu suggested.

Tadashi glanced at them, then put down his chopsticks. "Sashi and I went to the movies. Saw a boring one. Went out to eat. I paid. Went to my house, fooled around, then I dumped her yesterday." He seemed bored.

The guys gave him a thumbs up. "Nice going, Tadashi!" Himo cheered. "That girl was stacked! You HAD to have fucked her, right?"

Silence.

"Right?"

He glared at them. "Shut the hell up."

They blinked. "Dude...you're saying you didn't?"

"No. I'm not as much of a douche bag as you guys."

They frowned. It was always like this.

"Tadashi, man," Zegen said, putting his arm around his friend. "You gotta understand that women were made to have sex with. They're here for us to enjoy. And we're here to give them a purpose and to make sure there's more of them in the years to come. It's just the way the world works."

"Uh-Huh..." the boy sighed, turning back to his food.

This was his group of friends – a team of play boys who would go out with girls, or rather, go through them, like they were toilet paper, and they seemed to think of them as such. In the beginning, it had been fun. But gradually, Tadashi was finding less and less enjoyment out of these temporary companions. He suddenly found himself wanting a real relationship; someone he could connect with, someone he could love.

Suddenly, he was choosing girls that weren't as popular or preppy as the ones his cohorts were. Girls who were proving Zegen wrong. Girls who actually seemed to value their bodies. He was the only virgin in the group at this point, but it wasn't something he necessarily regretted. In fact, it was because of these girls that he was becoming bored with using people, breaking their hearts. The ones that cried when things got too intense, who were honest about not feeling ready to be touched by him. Now, he just wanted to end the vicious cycle that he had gotten himself into.

"Tadashi...You were with that Sashi girl for a while. What was it, three weeks? Come on, man. Don't tell me you're getting attached."

He sighed. "I'm not."

Zegen grinned. "Dude, just find a new girl. I'll help this time. We'll find a babe good enough for you, promise."

"Oh, you're too kind."

* * *

As they walked out toward the gates some hours later, there was a cry from behind them.

"STOP RIGHT THERE YOU BASTARDS!"

The four boys turned around just as Zegen got a shoe to the face. He was knocked backward onto the cement as his friends stared at his attacker.

"You assholes have a lot of nerve, using girls like they're your play toys. Show some respect, why don't you?"

Tadashi's eyes widened. It wasn't a boy that had knocked his comrade to the ground, but a girl. Her dark eyes glared at them, her short blue hair blew with the wind, her bangs momentarily in her eyes. Squinting, he thought he could see some black hair hidden on the bottom half of her head. She stomped over to him and grabbed his collar.

"Are you Zegen?" she demanded.

Tadashi shook his head. "N-No...the guy you just kicked is."

She released him. "Well, that starts things off right." She shooed Himo and Gyuu away from her target and sat on his chest. "You've got a lot of nerve, thoughtlessly taking Chuuko's virginity like that, you scum."

"What's it to you?" the boy snapped at her.

She grabbed his forehead and slammed his head on the ground. "It's everything to me. It's everything to all the girls you've used up until now. I usually don't do anything, but when you fuck my best friend and leave her only days later, it becomes my business. Men like you make me sick."

Tadashi heard some crying and looked behind him to see the girl in question being consoled by a few other female students. He looked at the girl who was preying on her ex-boyfriend. He hadn't noticed her before. No one had ever confronted them about their lustful ways.

The girl glared at Zegen. "Now, you listen, and you listen GOOD. You men owe us women more than we owe you. We suffered through life as lesser beings, your slaves. We're the ones who carry your children, who go through the pain of childbirth, who take care of the children, sacrificing our youth in the process. Your pain can't possibly compare to ours. Yeah, we need you to get the process started, but I can't see why anyone would want a chauvinist pig like you. Nothing would make me happier than to rid the gene pool of all the indecent, insupportable assholes of the world. " She got off him and beckoned her friend over. "Now, apologize to Chuuko for using her, and robbing her of something she told me was supposed to be for that one guy she feels a real connection with. SAY IT!"

By now, the boy was petrified. "I-I'M SORRY CHUUKO - I'M REALLY SORRY!"

The girl smirked. "Good. Now, treat women with respect from now on." She smiled innocently and cocked her head. "'Kay?" She turned away, putting her arm around her friend as they walked back toward the group of girls.

Tadashi watched her intently. This girl had reduced his pimp of a friend to tears. What _was_ she? He flinched as she stopped and studied him.

"Sashi said that you broke up with her; is she correct?" she said finally.

He tensed. Was he going to get a beating, too? "Y-Yeah...I...I did..."

To his surprise, she gave him a half-smile. "She said you were nice about it, that you said you'd still be there if she needed you. Thanks. She really needs someone to lean on." With that, she went on her way, rubbing Chuuko's back.

He stared after her. "Who was that...?"

"Oh, that was Xue. Usui Xue"

He whipped around to see a red-haired boy with a headband in his hair. "Her name is Xue...? But that sounds Chinese..."

"That's because she IS Chinese. Well, half anyway. Me too. Actually, she's my-"

"And the way she looks. She's an Ainu...but she's so popular, it seems like. Usually, Ainu get berated a lot."

"Well, yeah...But..."

"Man...Chinese AND an Ainu. What a mix. I wonder how her parents met..."

The boy raised his hand. "Um, Senpai..."

Tadashi touched his chin in thought. "I love exotic women..." he said whistfully.

His kohai gave up, sighing.

"Yo, Tadashi!" Himo called over. "Come help us with Zegen, alright?"

"Yeah, I'm coming." He looked behind him at the junior high student. "You know a lot about her?"

He nodded. "Yeah! Like I was trying to say, she's-"

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, kid," Meihou said. "You're going to tell me all about that Xue girl."

His friends walked over to him. "Tadashi, what the hell are you doing? We gotta get Zegen to the nurse!"

But he was just staring at the blue-haired girl in the distance.

"What's up, dude? Have you found your next girl?" Gyuu asked excitedly.

Tadashi smirked. "Yeah, I have."

The redhead went over to him. "What? Who?"

Tadashi leaned down and wrapped his arm around Seta's neck, pointing straight in front of him.

"Usui Xue, by the bonfire festival, you're going to be mine!"


	80. The Taming of the Ainu

I don't have much to say. I have a migraine and I'm going to bed before my skull splits open. Hope you like the chapter!

**Notes: "Chu" is the Japanese sound effect for kissing.**

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty: The Taming of the Ainu**

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"And then he said that he was going to make you his girlfriend, Neesan."

Xue turned her nose up as they approached their family's apartment. "People want what they can't have, Seta. It's just the way the world works. Mom taught us from a young age that we don't need to be with someone in order to be happy. That said, I don't need this Tsukishi person in order to feel good about myself." Her eyes lowered. "I have too many things on my mind as it is."

"Um...Neesan...His name is Tadashi. Meihou Tadashi," Seta timidly corrected her. "A-And he...he said he'd help me so Lien will fall in love with me! He's really a good guy, Neesan!"

She scoffed at him and began walking up the stairs. "We'll see. Don't forget the people he hangs around with. You can tell a lot about someone by seeing the types of friends they keep." She froze as she grasped the door knob to their home.

Her brother bumped into her, grabbing the railing so he wouldn't fall. He looked up at her. "Neesan? What's wrong?"

She seemed to bow her head, then swiftly turned and smiled at him. "Hey, Seta, do me a favor, will you?"

He blinked at her. "Okay...what is it?"

Xue reached into her book bag and gave him a thousand yen bill. "I forgot to stop and get some of those cookies Dad likes. Would you mind running to the store and getting them for me?"

He took it cautiously. "But I thought he just got some last--"

"You know Dad! He's such a glutton he ate them all!" She physically turned him and gently pushed him down a couple stairs. "Now go on, shoo, shoo. Go buy Daddy's happy-fun-time cookies! I even gave you enough so you can get something for yourself, too!"

He looked at her nervously. "But Neesan, I--"

She shoved him. "Tata! See you in a few minutes!"

After one more nervous glance, Seta went back down the stairs toward the nearest drug store. Xue took a deep breath, then eyed her front door as if it were a formidable enemy. Slowly, she opened it and stepped inside. As she took her shoes off, she could hear yelling from the kitchen.

"Why can't you get a **real** job? You know, one that makes **money**?"

"Says the one who stays home all day folding clothes! I'd like to see _you_ get a job and help out the situation. Oh, wait, I'm the only one here with a degree in anything."

"And what would it be in, hm? Asshattery? So you can go on to be a professional asshat? Sounds about right to me."

"Oh, Rong, you're so damn funny."

"And don't you _dare_ play that card with me, Usui Horokeu! When Xue was born, we agreed that you'd be the bread-winner for the family, as much as I didn't want to rely on you. So where's the bread 'Aokun', hm? I'd like to see it!"

"I'd like to see you try to run your own business! It'd be wonderful to wipe that goddamn smirk off your face for once."

"Then give up on that shit whole and use your degree to work for some big company! Xue's applying to Tokyo University! You know how much ONE SEMESTER there costs, hm? SIX. HUNDRED. **THOUSAND **YEN!! That money isn't going to fall out of the sky, Horokeu! Unless there's some magic Ainu money dance I don't know about!"

"You've get some hell of a nerve you haughty b--"

"I GOT MY TEST BACK!" Xue cried as she bolted into the room and pounced on her father, stopping him from doing anything undesirable.

HoroHoro hit the ground, obviously surprised by her entrance. He blinked as she backed off of him. "You mean that one you had me help you study for?"

She smiled and nodded. "Yup!" She stood up and reached into her bag. "Okay, you two stand together, and close your eyes and hold out your hands." Hesitantly, her parents obeyed, making her slightly relieved. At least they weren't yet at the point where they didn't want to be close to each other. Xue placed the test in their hands. "Okay, open!"

Her parents opened their eyes. HoroHoro was the first to let go of the paper and hug his little girl. "ANOTHER one hundred, Xue? I'm so proud of you!"

Rong smiled as she went over and patted her head. "I am, too. You're such a hard worker."

Xue beamed. "Hehe, thanks!"

Rong looked at the test again. "Well, up on the fridge it goes." She walked over to it and looked for a free magnet.

"M-Mom! I'm not a little kid anymore!"

She smiled and turned after attaching the test to the cool surface. "Maybe, but I'm still going to show off how smart you are." She looked at the clock. "I should start thinking about supper, I guess."

HoroHoro nodded. "Let me help."

Xue watched them as they went through the fridge and took out pans, smiling faintly.

_At least they'll be together for a little longer._

**

* * *

**

The next morning, she rummaged through her locker in search of her lunch money as her friends looked on. She had given the last of her money to Seta the day before in order to keep him from knowing about their parents' quarreling. Now, she would have to go without food until another money-making opportunity arose.

"I know I have a couple yen bills in here somewhere..." Papers and knick-knacks headed for the floor.

"Xue, you really should clean that thing out," Chuuko said hesitantly.

"What are you talking about? It's fine! It's in here, I've just hidden it very well!"

"In other words, you've lost it."

"I HAVE NOT!" She frantically started tossing things out of the storage area. "WHERE THE FUCK IS IT?!"

"Here."

She looked over to see Tadashi smiling at her with a thousand yen bill in his hand. Almost as if she were insulted, she snapped her head back in a snotty fashion. "I don't accept charity - especially not from someone who hangs out with pigs. I can't stand the stink."

He leaned against the locker. "You can always pay me back, Zooay-Chan."

She glared at him. "What did you just call me?"

"I'm sorry, Zooay-hime is more appropriate, ne?"

Xue stared at him, then went back to her locker. "Shut up and leave me alone. I'm looking for my money."

He chuckled. "That's what I'm saying, I can lend you the money, but you know, you never have to pay me back. It's the Pretty Girl Privilege, reserved for only the most beautiful goddesses in the school." He shook the bill a little to urge her to take it. "Go on, Zooay-hime, you can take it."

"Umm...Tadashi..." Chuuko whispered. "That isn't how you say her name..."

"She's right, it's not!" Xue barked at him, whipping the locker door back so it smacked his hand. Tadashi flinched and rubbed it as she glared at him. "My name is Chinese, so it's pronounced SHU-AY. Get it? It's not a 'zoo' sound! SHU!!" She puckered her lips as she made the sound for him.

He blinked at her, then grinned. He leaned down and kissed her. "Chu," he said with a smile.

Passersby gasped as her three friends huddled together in fear, taking a few steps back. Xue looked surprised, then clenched her fist for a moment. She grabbed the money. "Thank you, apparently I'm running a kissing booth."

"It wouldn't be a bad idea," Tadashi replied as he leaned against the lockers. "I'd be your number one customer."

She gave him a fake smile as she pulled her arm back. "Go to hell."

He blinked. "What?"

She punched his cheek as hard as she could, sending him flying down the hall. He hit the ground near his friends, who bent down to help pick him up.

"Tadashi, dude," Gyuu said and he pulled him up, "I think you should give up on this one. I mean, I don't think it's going to be easy like all the other girls you've gotten to go out with you. And you won't attract anyone else with bruises on your face."

"It's fine..." Tadashi said in a daze. "I love strong women..."

"Dude," Zegan said. "There's a difference between strong and homicidal. That girl just might kill you if you don't stop!"

Tadashi suddenly jumped up, revived. "I've never given up on getting the girl I want, and I'm sure as hell not starting now." He looked up to see that Xue and her friends had already gone to the cafeteria. "Every girl has a weakness, something that'll turn them to mush no matter who's involved. Once I find that girl's Achille's heel, the rest will be child's play."

His friends looked at each other.

"Is it really worth it when you're only going to be together for a couple weeks?"

"OF COURSE IT'S WORTH IT!"

Zegan sighed. "Fine. Just don't come crying to us when she puts you in a coma."

"Oh my gosh! Did Neesan smack you?!"

They turned to see Seta behind them.

"Hey, Kid From Yesterday! How goes it?"

The boy looked worried as he slowly pointed at the victim's cheek. "There's a big red mark on your face, Senpai. And your mouth is kinda bleeding."

Tadashi casually touched the sore corner of his mouth to find drops of blood on his finger. He reached into his blazer's pocket and whipped out a handkerchief, using it to rub the crimson liquid away.

"She's obviously just playing hard to get," he said with a nonchalant shrug. "I've met her type before, and they cave eventually."

"But didn't you say you wanted Neesan to be your date for the bonfire festival? That's only about a month away..."

He patted the younger boy as if he were a wide-eyed innocent. "I've got this all under control. I've been doing this since primary school, so I know what I'm doing."

"If you say so..."

**

* * *

**

After school, Tadashi pulled Seta aside.

"You wanted me to teach you how to get that girl, right?"

Seta's eyes lit up. "Yeah!"

"Alright! First rule: Never give up unless she flat out says that she's not going to go out with you. Even then, give it a couple more tries. Girls can change their minds VERY quickly. All it takes are a few good deeds to put you in a good standing. So, think of something nice you can do for this girl."

His pupil nodded eagerly. "Okay!"

"Next..." He looked at Seta's hair. "Girls usually don't go for the dyed look. They'll think you're some sort of yanki or something."

Seta lightly pulled on a piece of hair dangling near his eye. "But...But this is my real hair..."

"You've been dying it so long that you think it's your natural color? Geez, kid. Your parents be a couple of punks or something..."

"Oh, so now you're even going after my brother?"

"Eh?"

Tadashi turned as Xue grabbed his hair and used it to yank his head back enough so she could glare down at him. When he finally lost his balance, she let go, allowing him to fall to the ground on his back. He lay there, as if waiting for something, before finally speaking.

"Aren't you going to sit on me?"

Xue tossed her head. "I'm not going to give you the pleasure, you womanizer."

Seta cautiously touched his sister's arm. "N-Neesan, he wasn't doing anything bad, honest! He was just giving me some advice!"

"Don't try to cover up for him. I heard what he said about your hair."

Her victim blinked up at them. "'N-Neesan'? You mean..."

Xue sighed and folded her arms. "Slow, aren't we? That's right. He's my little brother, which is why I can't let his mind be corrupted by your perverted ideas."

Tadashi sat up. "You never told me she was your sister!"

"I tried to!" the boy called back.

His sister kicked her prey to the ground again. "Now, you listen, and you listen well, Tsukishi."

"...It's Tadashi, Neesan."

She waved him off. "Right, whatever. Either way, my brother doesn't dye his hair. It's naturally that color, courtesy of our loving mother."

"You mean, because she's the Chinese one?"

Another annoyed sigh. "That's right, we're all at least half Chinese except for our father. But that doesn't matter. Ethnicity means nothing when it comes to things like this."

Tadashi smirked. "Are you sure you just don't think I'm too good for you, and you're hiding your feelings because you feel badly about being Chinese?"

She smiled. "Oh, you're so cute." She grabbed his collar and tossed him into a nearby bin of basketballs. "I hope you suffocate, Tsukishi, YOU HEAR ME?"

"...yes ma'am..."

She sighed and touched her forehead. "Obviously, I'm doing something wrong if I'm attracting scum like him." Seta's worried eyes caught her attention and she turned to him. "He's not going to die if someone finds him in time, so stop worrying." Her watch beeped and she looked at it. "Right. I have a ballet meeting right now, so you'll be okay going home alone, right?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

"Alright, then. Call me if anything happens, okay? I'll be home around six."

"Okay..."

He started slowly trudging down the street toward their home, looking back at her like a shooed puppy. Xue stared after him empathetically. She knew he hated walking home alone. It was a long walk in the first place, but having no one to talk to made it even longer. When he was out of sight, she made her way to the dance room.

Xue hadn't been recruited as a prima ballerina, but as a stand-in for a male counterpart, since no boys had joined the group. The members had pounced on her because of her height and build, begging her to lend them a hand so they could perform a favored production. It wasn't her favorite thing in the world, but she enjoyed it enough to keep going. It was one thing that had made her known and well liked among the girls.

She dropped her bags just outside of it and whipped out her cellphone, quickly dialing her home number.

_I have to make sure they're not fighting when Seta gets in._

**

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**

Nearly two hours later, as her classmates waved goodbye, Xue put her toe shoes in her locker and ran her head under the shower before putting her blue and white uniform back on. She glanced at her cellphone in the mirror's reflection, wondering if she should call home again to make sure her parents weren't fighting.

_Nah, they wouldn't do it with Seta home_.

She was just about to jump the gate when she heard a grunt from behind her. She turned to see a hand flapping at her from within the wiry confines of the basketball cage. Xue frowned and walked over to it. It flapped a little more, and she sighed, then kicked the cage forcefully, sending it to the ground. Tadashi spilled onto the concrete along with the basketballs.

"You aren't dead yet?" she asked, seemingly disappointed. She walked over and bent down, picking up one of the balls and returning it to the large, garbage can-like container.

"Of course not. If I was weak enough to be defeated by the likes of these, I could never be a protector to the woman I love." He smiled up at her.

She bounced another ball dangerously close to his head. "What are you babbling about now?" She shot it, making it bounce off the wall and into the bin. "I knew you were stupid, but you're really starting to make me wonder just how low your IQ is."

When he didn't reply, she glanced down to see him tilting his head. It didn't take her more than a few seconds to figure out what he was trying to accomplish. She stood on his throat.

"Can you see up my skirt better now, you pervert?"

"Gragh...G...Get...off..Brea...uhh..."

Xue finally stepped off of him with a haughty, "Hmph." Tadashi sat up, clutching his neck. After some panting and coughing, he looked up to see that she was offering him her hand. He accepted it, and she pulled him up.

"Hehe, like I thought. You're not so cold after a--"

"Don't get me wrong. I just hate picking on people who can't fight back, like those imbeciles on Futou High's rugby team." She sighed as she remembered how she had easily overpowered the team's captain after he wouldn't stop bothering the female students watching the game on the bleachers. "Either way, just please, stop bothering me. I don't want to have to humiliate you any more than I already have. Gather up what little pride you have left and go home, Tadashi." She turned on her heel started for the gate again.

"Wait up!"

When the pitter-patter of his movements met her ears, she tensed, instantly turning and thrusting his hand away when it rested on her shoulder. She glared at him.

"I said for you to leave me alone. Are you deaf or something? Or are you some sort of masochist that gets off on having girls beat you up?"

He tried to not seem intimidated. "Why do you hate me so much?"

Xue stared at him blankly, the question coming at her from left field. After it had finally registered in her mind, she clenched her fists, bending her arms inwards as she bowed her head, bearing her teeth.

Tadashi tilted his head. "Huh? What's got you so riled up? Hey..." He went to touch her, but she exploded in an angry outburst, flinging her arms out and dropping her school bag.

"Why do I hate you? Are you seriously asking me that?!" Without waiting for an answer, she shoved him backwards, causing him to back up as she advanced toward him.

"Are you stupid?! Are you some sort of clueless idiot?! Why should I even give a loser like you the time of day, HUH?!"

Tadashi looked over his shoulder in an effort to watch where he was backing up. He hadn't anticipated the wave of rage he was receiving at the moment.

"You know what the problem is with assholes like you? You think you know what girls want in a boyfriend, and you woo them wearing a mask on your face, pretending to be the prince they've always wanted!"

"_Your father...when I found out I was pregnant with you, he was just as happy and excited as I was. He __wanted__ to be with us...to be in your life."_

"Then you lead them on, complimenting them making them trust you, allowing them to believe that you'll be there for them forever, when that couldn't be further from the truth! Their bodies are just your play toys!"

"_Don't worry, Xue. Your mom's stuck with me, no matter what happens."_

"GIRLS NEED COMMITMENT! WE NEED TO BE SURE SOMEONE'S GOING TO BE THERE WHEN WE FALL APART!!"

"_Daddy, what are the flowers for?"_

_He smiled. "Mom doesn't feel well, so I bought them for her. Think they'll make her feel better?"_

"_Yeah!"_

She couldn't stop the tears from coming. "This may be some game to you, but it's not to us! We're serious! Chuuko wanted to be loved so badly that she settled for that scumbag friend of yours, and Sashi wanted to know that someone found her attractive..."

"_Aokun always had this way of making me feel beautiful, no matter what the situation." She chuckled. "Even when I was dating a porcelain dish due to morning sickness."_

"You didn't know her like that! That other bastard didn't even care about his "girlfriend" or her feelings! People like you are the worst! You just take, and take, AND TAKE! What do you think you're going to get from me, huh?! I don't have boobs as big as the other girls, I'm nearly your height, and I have more pride in my heritage than you could even comprehend! I'm not someone who's interested in your stupid games!!"

"_Dammit, I'm never going to get these Ainu markings right. It's hard weaving it like this!"_

"_Rong, Xue's not going to know the difference, and you're doing fine."_

"_Pirika should be the one doing this...I don't even know what this pattern means."_

_He smiled at her. "They don't really mean anything. The only thing the elders want us to get out of this is the experience of the two of us working together, like partners should."_

Xue shoved him again, causing his back to hit their school's brick wall.

"When will you be satisfied?! When you've taken the virginity of every girl in the school?! SORRY but I'm not going to be part of your plot, you SLUT! WHORE! DEGENERATE!"

"_Xue, if anyone says anything bad about how you were born, just know that we always wanted you."_

"_Yeah. The stork was making his rounds, and dropped you on our doorstep."_

_Her parents looked at each other and smiled. "It was like getting the best present ever," they said._

She grabbed his collar, ruffing him up, but trying to hide her face at the same time. "Leave me alone..." she whispered. "Just leave me alone..."

"Why--"

"IF YOU EVEN HAVE ANY OF THESE STUPID FEELINGS FOR ME THAT YOU SAY YOU DO, THEN YOU'LL LISTEN TO ME." She glanced up at him, her eyes puffy and red. "DON'T YOU THINK I HAVE ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH?!"

He just blinked down at her. Why was she suddenly flipping out like this and crying?

_Well, this might be a good time to score some brownie points..._

He wrapped his arms around her, but she shoved him again, her eyes burning with rage. Silent, she slapped him across the face as hard as she could. When he looked up, he saw that she was slowly walking away, stopping only to pick up her book bag, then continue on. He watched her jump the gate, then went into the school to find his belongings.

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The next day, Tadashi had seemed to get the message. He, for the most part, kept his distance, coming before her only to hold a door for her or pick up something she had dropped. Each time, Xue had turned her nose up, either walking quickly through the held door, or snatching the item from his hand.

Her friends could tell that something had happened, but because of Xue's attitude that day, no one dared to ask her for details. That, and they could tell she wasn't feeling well. Her cheeks were red, and she was constantly grabbing a handkerchief from her pocket, or turning away and covering her nose and mouth with her sleeve.

Xue was glad when three o'clock rolled around. She was skipping her ballet meet and going home. Seta was staying over a friend's house for the night, and she would be able to go right to bed, in the hopes of feeling better sooner.

To her surprise, no yelling could be heard as she opened the door. It was silent. Dead silent. She took off her shoes and put her school bag on the rack.

"I'm home," she called weakly. She walked into the kitchen to see her parents standing at their dining room table. Thinking nothing of it, she got a glass of orange juice from the refrigerator.

"Oh, hi, honey," Rong said in a distant voice.

For once, HoroHoro was silent.

The air was dead. Cold. Suffocating.

Xue nervously walked over to them. "So, how were your days?"

"Fine..." her mother said softly.

She put down the glass and draped herself over her father. "What's wrong, Daddy? You tired?" She giggled, but he stayed the same.

"Horokeu, can't you even say 'hello' to her?" Rong snapped at him.

"Hi," he finally said in a dead voice.

"It's okay, Daddy. Maybe you've just caught my cold. I was just going to go in for a nap, so you come too, okay?" Looking over his shoulder, she could see a packet of papers on the table. "Hm? What's this?"

Her eyes scanned the page, widening as they were filled with the words she feared most.

"KYOGI RIKON"

Frantic, she grabbed the packet and looked at it. Rong's name was already one it. She flipped through, complaints riddling the pages.

"W-Why...? Why are you guys doing this all of a sudden? I thought things were going to get better soon..."

"They haven't gotten better fast enough," Rong explained, folding her arms.

Xue stared at the complaints again. "_Loss of affection_." She looked up. "I-I know! How about you and Daddy go away somewhere for a week? Then you guys and can bond and stuff! Everything would be okay then, ri--"

"XUE! We don't have the money for that!! This is the decision we've made. It's what's best for us and for you and Seta. Do you really want us to argue all the time?"

"YES! YES I DO!!" she screamed. "I'd rather listen to it day and night than have you two get divorced! I know you two still love each other so--"

"Xue," HoroHoro finally said quietly. "Rong's right...It's for the best." He turned slightly. "Don't worry. No matter what happens, just remember that we both love you, okay?"

She stared at him. What kind of reassurance was that? That didn't matter to her. She was more concerned about them loving _each other_.

_Why...Why...Why couldn't I do anything? Why couldn't I have thought of something to stop this? Why can't they be like Hana's parents...Or Ren and Lien's...? WHY MINE?!_

She took the packet, held it horizontally, and tore it in half.

"XUE!" Rong cried. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"NO! What do **you** think **YOU'RE **doing?!" she screamed back. Her parents blinked at her, surprised by her outburst, but she wasn't done yet. "I hate you! I hate you both!! You can't even try to work this out! You never even asked for help! YOU'RE TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT AND I HATE YOU FOR IT!!"

She stared at them, panting for a moment, then took the ripped halves, clutching them to her chest, and dashed out of the room and toward the door.

"Xue! Get back here!"

She ignored them. She quickly stepped into her shoes, then flung the door open and ran outside and down the stairs. She jumped the last ramp, landing on her feet and bolting into the crowds that were walking the streets. It was sprinkling, but she wasn't about to let some mist stop her. She had to get away from that house. Not for herself, but for them. It'd take them weeks to get new divorce papers. Maybe, by then, she would have thought of a way to fix things.

As she ran down the street, she bumped shoulders with a boy her age. Without saying anything, she stepped to the side and went around him. Her mind was blank. She could hardly remember which way she had come. But getting back home wasn't a concern right now.

A foot stuck out and she hit the ground. The sole of a boot was crushing her left hand, the one holding the divorce papers.

"Isn't this that Xue girl?"

"The one who beat the rugby captain up earlier this year?"

"Yeah that's the one."

One of the boys, wearing a Futou High uniform, pulled her up. "What's the matter, doll-face? Why're you cryin', huh?"

She hid her face, seething. Without saying a word, she raked his face with her nails, then punched him in the stomach, and kicked him to the ground. She gazed at his group from over her shoulder. They cringed, and she ran off.

Suddenly, there were no people around. She was alone in the slitted sunlight. In a fit of anger, she yelled out to the sky,

"It's okay! You can start pouring rain on me now!! You know, set the mood a little!!"

The sprinkling became heavier. Within minutes, there was a downpour. Xue spit some water out of her mouth, then went over to a stone bench nearby. But instead of sitting on it, she knelt on the ground, folding her arms on the hard surface and hiding her face in them. With no one to bother her, she let herself cry as hard as she could. She whispered to herself in a raspy voice.

"I was the one that brought Mom and Dad together...b-but I couldn't do anything to _keep_ them together...Why does Mom think this is the best thing? We can't survive if she doesn't get a job. I love Daddy...I need him...I need them both...Together...Both Seta and I need them...to be together..."

_Happy Days! Happy Days! A night of stars...Happy Days! Happy Days! At the rendezvous point..._

Xue slowly took out her cell phone.

"**HOME :D**"

She opened it. "Hello..."

"Xue! Where the hell are you?! Come home right this instant!!" Rong cried on the other end.

There was a struggle, and suddenly HoroHoro was on the phone. "Xue, we're really worried about you! Just come home and we can talk about this, okay?"

He kept calling for her until she coughed and dropped the phone. Her face was burning up.

_I guess I should have taken my nap first..._

Her eyes closed and she slumped against the bench as she passed out. She couldn't hear the squishing sound of someone coming up behind her.

He smirked. "And what do we have here?"


	81. Loving and Fixing

This wasn't how my updating was supposed to go. Not at all. Things got weird. Then...I guess I sort of got distracted by someone. Then things got hectic. Then I was watching Hikaru no Go... Well, I'm just sorry, guys. As weird as it sounds, with school I might be updating more often, seeing as I spend my time in the computer lab between classes. I also want to finish this by the end of the yeah so I can work on a Shaman King anime music video for Anime Boston, but that doesn't mean I'm going to rush and wrap it up in three chapters. You'll get the ending the way it was supposed to be.

Oh, by the way, last week was the fic's second anniversary! Time goes by fast, doesn't it?

**Notes: Xue's ringtone is the song "Happy Days" by Otsuka Ai. She and the writer of the lyrics own all rights to the song (aka, Jezzy isn't talented enough to write lyrics).**

**In case you haven't noticed, Rong is the one who's adamant about the divorce. Yes, I'm aware she's come down with "bitchitus". Also, there's a lot of ANGRY CAPS OF DOOOOM in here. Sorry if it hurts your eyes.**

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-One: Loving and Fixing...Sort Of...**

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Xue opened her eyes to the sound of a crackling fire. She sprang awake, sitting up quickly, only to begin a coughing fit.

"Woah, woah, woah. You should just lie down for now. You were soaked to the bone when I brought you in."

Xue froze, then slowly looked up into Tadashi's eyes. She shrieked, slapping him and pushing him away. He fell back against the carpet and held his cheek.

"Jeez...You really don't know how to appreciate someone's help, do you?" he said in an annoyed voice.

Xue was too busy looking down at herself, realizing that she was in one of his shirts, but had no pants on. "What the hell is this?!" She glared at him. "If you touched me, Tadashi, I swear to the Great Spirits I'll beat you up so badly, you'll be begging for death."

_'Great Spirits'? What? _He sighed. "No, I didn't touch you. I'm not a complete scumbag."

"Just mostly."

"That was unneeded."

"STRIPPING ME was unneeded."

"You don't remember ANYTHING, do you?"

They stared each other down. Finally, she relented.

"No, I don't."

Tadashi sighed again and held up the soggy, torn pieces of paper. "You were passed out in Odori Park clutching these, and your cellphone was ringing off the hook."

"You didn't answer it, did you?" she snapped.

"No, I didn't. That song's kinda catchy."

"Good..." She scowled and clutched the blanket covering her. "Let them worry for a while." She looked out the window to see that it was dark out. "How long have I been here?"

"A few hours. It's almost seven now." Before she could move, Tadashi reached over to feel her forehead, then her cheek. "At least your fever's gone down."

She pushed the hand away. "Why'd you bring me here?"

He smiled at her weakly. "Actually, I followed you. You bashed into me, and I saw that you were crying, so I followed you to see what was going on. I'm glad I did. Those jerks from Futou High must've been following you, too. I beat the shit out of them and sent them running. 'Wish you could've seen me; I bet I looked pretty damn cool."

She blinked at him. "You beat them up?"

"Hehe, yeah." He used his index finger to wipe under his nose. _She must be touched by the way I defended her from those idiots._

"That's surprising, considering what a scrawny tart you are."

He sulked. "Can't you ever say anything nice to me? I just saved you, you know."

She studied him, then looked down. "You're right...sorry. I'm just thinking about a lot of things." She leaned over and bit her thumb.

He raised his eyebrows at her, then looked at the torn pages in his hand. He sifted through them.

"'Husband does not make enough money to sustain family. Seems to care more about his dreams than the livelihood of his family.'"

Xue's eyes widened.

"'Intimacy in bedroom has suffered and is now nearly nonexistent. Words of affection hardly ever exchanged.'"

She looked up at him. "Why are you reading that?!"

"'Holds role of housewife against spouse, despite the fact that there was only time for one parent to go to a university because of child.'"

Her eyes shot open. She grabbed the papers from his hands and tried to flip through them, but they stuck together. Any she did manage to were unreadable.

"Mom...why would she write something like that? She knows Daddy doesn't really think like that...They're just frustrated. And he's right, Mom should get a job, even just a part-time one. There are still things she can do even if she wasn't able to to college." She froze, her eyes widening in horror as it dawned on her. "It's my fault...I just made everything harder for them...If I hadn't been born, then...they...Mom and Dad wouldn't be..."

There was a clanging sound of metal, and the papers were ripped from her hands. She looked up in time to see Tadashi toss the pile into the flames, taking with it the words that had stabbed her so suddenly. For a moment, she just stared at the fireplace, then glanced over at him, the fire reflecting off his dark eyes.

"W-Why did you do that?" she asked finally.

He didn't look at her. "You shouldn't read horrible things like that. If you do, then you'll just feel sorry for yourself, and you'll start to believe that it really _is_ your fault, when that couldn't be further from truth. Show me a case where a divorce was the child's fault, and I'll buy you Tokyo Tower."

She clenched her fists. "What the hell do YOU know? Stop getting in my business, anyway! This is something I have to deal with on my own!"

"No, it isn't!" he cried, snapping his head over at her. "This is something your _parents_ have to deal with. As much as you wish you could save their marriage, if they don't think it's possible to resolve things, then you can't do do a single thing about it! You're powerless in a situation like this!"

"SHUT UP!" she screamed, covering her ears. "I CAN do something about it! I CAN!! I just need to figure out what it is!"

Tadashi frowned, then grabbed her shoulder and slapped her across the face. "You're not some angel that can fix things with a holy touch! You're a human being! You're just a third-year in high school! You can't save your parents from this fate! If they're determined to separate, then they're going to!"

She froze, then curled up in a ball, hiding her face. "I don't want to live with just one of them..."

"You may not have that choice."

"Shut up...just shut up. You have both of your parents. You can't imagine just how responsible I feel."

"You're wrong."

She looked up. "What?"

Tadashi looked at the ground, then pointed to a picture on the mantle above the fireplace. "You see that?"

Xue looked up to see a photograph of a high school girl in a cream colored uniform. She was smiling happily in front of some flower bushes, her dark blue, almost black, hair flowing behind her. A feather earring hung from her left ear.

"Yeah...What about her?"

He smiled sadly. "That's the only picture of my mother that I have, both in this house and in my mind."

She looked back at him. "...She's dead?"

He shrugged. "Who knows? She left me and my dad right after I was born. She was a high school student. I guess she didn't want to take care of a kid at her age, not that I can blame her. Haven't heard from her since."

"I'm sorry...That must be hard."

He forced a laugh. "At least I never knew her, so I can't exactly miss her."

She rested her chin on her knees. "I don't want to have to have that chance. I want them to stay together."

He glanced around, at a loss of what to say. _There's only one thing to do now..._ He left the room, then came back. "Oh Xue-chaaaaan...Guess what I haaaaaave!"

She groaned. "What."

"Ta-da! Your clothes!" he cried, holding up the garments.

She looked up, a small smile on her face. "Thanks...I-" She froze as she realized he was holding her bra.

"Hm, 34B...not bad..." he said in a thoughtful voice as he looked at the tag.

"HEY!" Xue jumped up, her face red from anger and embarrassment. "Give that back!"

Tadashi whistled. "Nice legs."

She looked down to see that she was only wearing a shirt; no pants. "You...You...YOU!!" She slapped him, taking back her clothes and hurriedly putting on her skirt.

"Sorry, Xue. I couldn't help it. I just can't stand you acting so weak and vulnerable. You're much more attractive when you're feisty," he said with a laugh. He looked up to see she had grabbed a large, thick book and was holding it over her head.

"I'm going to kill you!" she yelled as she started whacking him with it. "You have no right to look at my body, you bastard! I don't even let my FAMILY see it, so there's no way in hell you're ever going to!"

He looked up timidly. "But what about when we have sex?"

She paused, as if to try to tell if he was serious or not, then whacked him again. "I'm not going to be another notch in your belt! I'd never go out with someone like you!!"

After he had been felled to the ground, she dropped the book on his head. The cover stared back up at her, and she squinted at it.

"_Goddess Sweets_? Isn't that the most popular shoujo manga magazine in Japan? What's this idiot doing with it?"

She picked it back up, flipping through the pages. A post-it note was stuck on the edge of one of them, and she skipped to it. On it was a manga panel oozing romance and stuffed with fluff. Other pages selected included the mail bag page, and articles that dealt with how girls felt about love and how they liked to be romanced.

"Is this were he comes up with those stupid lines?" she scoffed, dropping it on his face again. She gathered her clothes and began looking for a bathroom to change in.

It took her forever to find one, it seemed. This wasn't an apartment, it was an actual house, one of few she had been in. She started to wonder just what it was that Tadashi's father did for a living. How could they have so much money if only his dad was working?

She heard a door slam, and quickly put her clothes on. She peeked out and walked back to the room she had been in previously.

A tall man with a mustache was talking to Tadashi, who was busy folding up the futon she had been sleeping on. The photo of Tadashi's mother was gone.

"Sorry I'm late, son," he said with a sigh. "At the last minute, some parents called in about their daughter going missing, so I was chained to the desk for a bit longer."

Tadashi smiled at him. "It's okay, Dad. I know stuff comes up. Your dinner's in the fridge. I waited so we could eat together."

"Thank you, Tadashi. That was thoughtful of you." He loosened his tie and turned.

Xue moved to step behind the wall, but Mr. Meihou saw her. She froze, not knowing how he was going to react to a girl having been in the house while he was at work.

Instead, he sighed. "Is this a new one?"

She blinked. _H-He doesn't care?! He wouldn't care if his son was having sex with random girls while he's at work? What the hell...Dad would kill any guy that was home alone with me._ She made a mental note to invite Tadashi over about ten minutes before her father got home from work.

Tadashi looked up to see her standing half in the dark. "Oh, no. She's just a girl from school. She was having a tough time, so I brought her over." He looked up at his father with large eyes. "...Is that okay?"

His father stared at him, then nodded minimally. "Just as long as she goes home soon, I don't mind." He turned and offered her his hand. "Meihou Kaiin."

A police badge on his breast reflected light, the word "chief" apparent to her. She grasped the hand and shook it as firmly as she could.

"Usui Xue, sir. I'm pleased to make your acquaintance."

His eyes widened. "Usui? You wouldn't be..."

_Oh shit...Me and my big mouth..._

"What's up, Dad?" Tadashi asked coming up behind them.

Kaiin whirled around to face him. "Where did you find her?"

"Odori Park. Why?"

"She's the reason why I was held up at work," he said looking back at her. "Her parents called the police station about two hours ago, hysterical because she had run out of the house after a disagreement, and they couldn't get a hold of her."

Xue frowned. _Disagreement? They were trying to file for divorce!_

"In any case," he continued, grabbing her wrist, "I have to take you home. Your parents are probably still calling the station as we speak."

"Let me come, Dad," Tadashi pipped in, noticing Xue's displeasure. "She'd probably feel better than just having you there."

His father studied him, then released her. "Alright. Just hurry up. I want to have my dinner."

"Right." He took Xue's hand, though she mildly flailed. "Come on, I'll even walk you up."

But she was staring at the ground. "How very kind of you..."

As they sat in the back seat of Kaiin's car, Tadashi leaned over to whisper in her ear.

"So, how are you going to thank me for saving your ass?"

She glared at him. "I don't have to do anything. I never asked for your help."

"Hm, a little ungrateful, aren't we? I'd like to see what you would have looked like if those flunkies from Futou High had gotten their hands on you."

Xue grit her teeth. "Fine...What the hell do you want?"

"Make me a bento for lunch tomorrow," he said without any hesitation.

"W-What?"

"You heard me. White rice is fine, but if you could put, you know, a heart or a happy face on it, that'd just make it better. Maybe meat or fish or something with it. But if you could get me some umeboshi on the side, that'd be cool, too. Oh, and don't forget the chopsticks!"

"Oh, I won't. What else would I stick up your nose?" she grumbled to herself.

"This is it, right?"

She shifted her eyes as the car pulled up to her family's apartment complex. "Yeah...Thank you..."

Tadashi got out with an umbrella, and offered her his hand, but she turned away from it, choosing to get out on her own. He persisted, following her closely up the stairs, trying to prevent her from getting wet. She kept speed walking to get away from him, but he finally grabbed her wrist and pulled her under the umbrella.

"At least try to act like you appreciate the fact that I dried your clothes for you," he said sarcastically.

She looked away from him. "I'm not looking forward to this. They're going to be so pissed." Her head drooped. When he tried to put his hand on her shoulder, she jerked away from him. "Don't touch me. The last thing I need is you putting your filthy hands on me. I don't know where they've been."

He looked slightly hurt, but glanced up as they approached her door. He pulled on her arm again to make sure she would hear him.

"You're wrong about me, Xue," he said quietly. "I'm not like them. I don't go out with girls to have sex with them. Yeah, it used to be my goal, but I don't care anymore. I want someone to be with. I'm honestly looking to fall in love with someone and make them happy."

She glared at him. "So why are you wasting your time with me?"

He reached out and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close so he could kiss her. As she looked at him with bewildered eyes, he smiled weakly and rested his forehead against hers.

"You're the one I want, Xue," he said quietly. "You're someone I can see myself falling in love with...You're the person I've been saving myself for. I know that if you just give me the chance, I can make you the happiest girl in the world."

Xue's breathing hitched. It was like a line from that manga magazine he had, but he wasn't copying it word for word. The same idea was there, but his own words and emotions were shining through.

_It's...It's almost like...he means it..._

Her body quivered before she shoved him away and ran into the apartment, slamming the door. She leaned against it as she stared at the floor, trying to analyze what had just happened.

But after slamming the door so hard, of course she wouldn't have time to do that. Loud, hurried footsteps could be heard mere moments before her parents appeared. They stared at her for a few moments, then HoroHoro ran and thrust his arms around her.

"Thank the gods..." he whispered. "You have no idea how worried we were!" He looked at her, the hold he had on her shoulders tightening by the second. "Where did you go? How did you get home? Did you eat?" Without waiting for her to answer, he started pulling her toward the kitchen. "Let me just heat up dinner for you..."

Rong blocked the way. "I'm glad you're home. Don't do that again," she said darkly. "Where are the papers, Xue?"

"Rong, that doesn't matter right now!" HoroHoro cried. "Let's just make sure she's taken care of, then if you really feel like we need to worry about some stupid pieces of paper, then we'll get into it, but for the time being--"

She threw up her hands. "That's just it! You just personified why I got those papers in the first place! You just run away from issues that need to be dealt with, like a child! And to think you acted _surprised_ when I got them! I mean, honestly-"

"...Shut up."

"W-What did you say?"

Her daughter glared up at her. "I'm pretty sure you heard me. Stop talking crap about Dad. Neither of us appreciate it."

Rong just stared at her, bewildered, then the scowl was on her face again. "Oh sure, you defend _him_. _I'm_ always the bad guy here!"

"That's right, you are! And it's your own damn fault!"

HoroHoro tried to get between them. "Xue..."

She ignored him. "Have you even noticed that YOU'RE the one who starts every fight?! For the love of Okikurmikamuy, Mom, you nitpick SO much! You LOOK for things to fight about! Just last week, you berated him because the chicken he bought just so happened to be spoiled; so that means that Dad's incompetent and that he can't do the shopping anymore! It of course has NOTHING to do with the fucking store or the place where the chicken came from! That's right, it's all DAD'S FAULT!!"

Rong seemed about to defend herself, but Xue didn't dare stop.

"And do you ever think about how fucking lucky you are to have Dad for a husband? Hell, even when he was just your one night stand? He COULD have just let the door hit you in the ass on your way out and sent you back to China, BUT OH WAIT HE DIDN'T. You said he was 'excited' that you were pregnant and that he 'wanted' to be with us, and that it meant the world to you! Well guess what, HE STILL WANTS TO BE HERE EVEN THOUGH YOU BITCH AT HIM EVERY OTHER SECOND! IMAGINE THAT!!

"And it's so obvious that you haven't thought this through AT ALL. Where are you going to go if you and Dad separate, huh?! You'll have to move out and – GASP – GET A JOB, WHICH YOU COULD JUST DO RIGHT NOW! Oh, but then you'd have one less thing to fight about, so OF COURSE you can't do that!!"

"Well, that's--"

"And just so you know, if you do decide to go through with it, I'm staying with Dad. Seta will go with you because he doesn't want you to be alone, but that doesn't mean he loves you more or anything. But seriously, where the fuck are you going to go? You think Ren and Pin-Mei will just welcome you back with open arms?! They have their own family, and Li is their bodyguard now. Sure, Pin-Mei would convince Ren to let you stay, but you'd just be a bother to them. Oh, but don't worry if they eventually throw you out! The Wei family will let you live at their estate once Hell freezes over! So you have nothing to worry about!"

Then there was silence. Rong just stared at her. "How can you say those things to me? I'm...your mother..."

"How can you berate Dad when he's doing his best to support us?" Tears blurred her vision. "How can you say such awful things to him when he's your soul mate?"

Rong and HoroHoro's eyes locked. She looked at Xue again, whose glare showed no signs of letting up. Her hand slowly covered her mouth, her eyes beginning to burn as she took a few steps back. Without saying a word, she turned and quickly walked down the hall, going into the master bedroom and slamming the door. When it clicked, they knew she had locked it.

HoroHoro looked down at his daughter. "I know you were trying to helping me, but you can't treat your mom like that. What she's said to me wasn't even half as bad as what you said to her."

Xue didn't look at him. "Just...hold on a little longer, Dad, okay? I...I know things'll work out somehow...Just don't give up yet. Please. Mom still loves you, I know she does. But right now, she needs you. You should go to her."

He stared at her. "Xue...did you say all that just so--?"

"She needs you. Go."

After staring at her for a few more minutes, HoroHoro turned, got a butter knife from the drawer, and headed for the room he and his wife shared. Xue's gaze didn't leave the floor.

"This is all I can do for now," she whispered. "He...He's right...I'm powerless..." She closed her eyes and bit her lip as the feeling sunk in. "There's nothing I can do."

She leaned against the door frame as her father worked at the locked door. When it opened, she sighed quietly, hoping that something good would come from what she had done. A cold breeze came from the open window, and she shivered, clutching her arms. Her mother sobbed, and her father consoled, the door finally closing and locking again. Xue slumped to the ground, her expression blank.

Outside the apartment, Tadashi finally picked up his umbrella, closed it, and headed back to his father's car.

**

* * *

**

The next day, Tadashi looked up as a small box was dumped on his desk. He blinked and looked up.

"There's your fucking bento," Xue growled at him, then stomped away to join her friends, who were waiting for her at the door.

His eyes followed her until she was out of sight. After staring off into space for a moment or two, he looked down at the bento. To be honest, he hadn't expected her to follow through with it. He had been half joking anyway. Nonetheless, she had actually put all this work into making a lunch for him.

He closed his eyes as he remembered the yelling, the screaming, and the crying that had come from the small apartment the night before. The few words he had seen on the soggy divorce papers were engraved in his mind. He could still hear how she had screamed at him in frustration the day before that. He had told her last night that there was nothing she could do, but he himself wasn't willing to accept that.

_I heard them talking about money...If there was a way I could solve that problem..._

He wanted to laugh at himself. Of course there wasn't anything he could do.

_I guess there really isn't a way to solve this for her – to make her smile._

Tadashi shook his head, then unwrapped the napkin that covered the bento box and opened the lid. Inside, rice and meat were nestled next to each other. He smiled when he noticed that two umeboshi were used as eyes while a few small vegetables were used to create a happy face. It faded when he realized how he had asked her to do that when she obviously wasn't overflowing with happy thoughts.

When his guilt finally dissipated, he picked up the cheap wooden chopsticks inside, broke them apart, and quickly began stuffing the meat and rice into his mouth. After he swallowed, another smile formed on his lips.

"Nothing less than heavenly."

**

* * *

**

At three o'clock that afternoon, Tadashi strolled out of the building, planning on joining his friends at the arcade before a quick "study session" at Gyuu's house.

"Dude! Watch out!"

Tadashi looked up to see a member of boarding team heading for him at full speed on a skateboard. He took a few steps back as other students scattered to avoid the boarder, who whizzed past them, hit a rock, and came crashing to the ground.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he went over to him.

The skater looked up at him. "Dude! Look at my board!" he cried, holding up the two halves the board had split into. Tadashi could see duct tape on the broken ends. Obviously, it hadn't been strong enough to keep the board together.

"Wow, sorry...Was that my fault?" he asked.

"Nah, it's the budget's fault – or lack thereof," another voice grumbled.

Tadashi and the defeated skater looked behind them to see the captain of the boarding team scowling at the damaged equipment.

"M-Masahiro..." Tadashi heard the boy stutter.

The captain, a tall boy with bleached hair and a half-unbuttoned uniform, apathetically put down his own skateboard and grabbed a splintered half of his teammate's. He clenched it, then threw it at the ground, his face suddenly creased with anger.

"My brother worked hard to get this team established, but the school still doesn't take it seriously! They give us the cheapest, crappiest equipment, then refuse to give us any funds to buy new gear when the shit breaks! How the hell are we supposed to compete like this?!"

Tadashi looked at him cautiously. "Couldn't you guys just buy new stuff yourself?"

Masahiro glared at him. "You're the son of the Chief of Police, right?"

"Yeah..."

He scoffed at him. "Of course you talk about throwing money around – you've got enough of it. Come on, man. Do you even know how much a new skateboard costs?"

Tadashi took a step back. "Well..."

"If you want the board to last, you have to spend upwards of ten thousand yen. Sometimes, even up to twenty thousand! No amount of funding or legal fund raising is going to cover THAT price tag for six members' boards and pads. Unless you and your pops want to sponsor us and foot the bill."

When Tadashi didn't reply, he laughed, then helped his teammate get up. They picked up the broken skateboard, walked back around the school building, and disappeared.

"That jerk didn't even thank me for making him lunch! I mean, yeah, I said I would to pay him back for a favor, but OH MY GAWD ARGH!! It's like...MANNERS – GET SOME!!"

He whirled around, expecting to see Xue, but instead saw a second year girl surrounded by her friends, heading toward the gym. It hadn't been about him, but it made him realize that he hadn't even tried to thank Xue. Surely by now she was with the ballet troupe, so he couldn't do it today. He had already washed the bento box, so if he just wrote her a note thanking her, it should be fine.

"Yeah, that's all I need to do, right?" he kept murmuring to himself long after he'd passed the school gates. Surely it would be. Maybe. Xue had avoided him the whole day aside from those brief moments of giving him his lunch. How was he going to change the way she felt about him? Her venomous tone, the harsh glare he was always greeted with...

_Maybe it's hopeless..._

"Wh-WHOA!!"

Tadashi looked up to see a crooked pillar of boxes teetering, the arms that held them shaking uncontrollably. They looked dangerously close to crashing to the ground. Quickly, he dropped his book bag and grabbed the top two boxes, leaving one in the arms of their owner. Once they had been steadies, he heard a sigh of relief.

"Thanks a bunch, kid. If you hadn't appeared, these boards would be history!" A cheerful man peeked around the boxes and smiled at him. "You're a life saver!"

Tadashi smiled back. "Don't mention it. Do you need help carrying them or something?"

"Would you mind? I just need to get the door open."

"Sure, no sweat."

The owner reached into his pocket, pulled out the key to the shop, and unlocked the door. He showed Tadashi in to the back, where he told him to set the boxes down.

"Thanks again. That would have cost me a little more than a few yen if the merchandise had been damaged," he said gratefully.

"Like I said, it's no problem." Tadashi patted one of the boxes. "What's in them anyway?"

"Skateboards. I figured I might get some business if I put the snowboards on sale and stocked up on those instead." He sat on a wooden crate.

He nodded. "I see..." He paused, wondering if he should prod. "Why? Times been tough?"

The man hesitated before nodding with a nervous smile. "Heh heh...yeah. The Missus thinks I should give up and get a "real job", like I'm selling lemonade or something."

His helper smirked. "Yeah, I know. Women think they know us like our moms do, when they really sometimes couldn't be more wrong."

The shopkeeper gave a shaky chuckle, then allowed it to fade as he shrugged. "Maybe she's right. Who knows? But even if I wanted to give up now, my daughter would probably never let me hear the end of it."

Tadashi looked up. "Your daughter? Why? Is she a firecracker?"

There was a twinkle of fatherly pride in the man's eyes. "Yeah, I guess you could say that. As hard as her mom is trying to get me to give up on the shop, she's trying to drive me to keep it open and stick it out. She always reminds me that it was one of a few dreams I had – to have my own store like this." He studied him. "You look like you're her age, and you wear her school's uniform, so you might've seen her around."

"Yeah, maybe..." Tadashi sighed and looked at the ground. He'd seen plenty of girls. He knew nearly all the names of the third year girls, and many of the second years'. Still, there was only one he wanted right now, and he didn't want to accept the fact that he might not be able to win her.

"Here."

A picture was shoved in his face. His eyes widened.

There was Xue, posing in a black leotard next to a balance beam. A shorter girl dressed in red with long navy blue hair and yellow eyes stood next to her, blushing nervously.

He wanted to go on a tangent, exclaiming that he in fact searched for her everyday, and how attractive he found her and how hard he was trying to win her affection. Instead, he hid his excitement.

"Yeah, she looks familiar. I think I've seen her around the halls or cafeteria or something."

HoroHoro smiled as he looked at the picture again. "She's a regular fireball, alright. Did gymnastics until the ballet team captured her and made her one of their own. Kinda wish she'd go back. Nothing like watching your adorable...beautiful daughter flip around, that cute look of concentration on her face..."

He was gazing at the photo, all the happy memories of her accomplishments and the sting of watching her anguish over defeat returning. When he and his wife would sit next to each other, grasping each other's hands tightly and holding their breaths, wondering if their daughter would stick her landing, then jumping up and down, hugging and kissing when she did.

"Um...Mr. Usui, sir?"

He looked up. "Hm?" Then he realized what he must have looked like to this stranger. He cleared his throat. "Yeah..." Quickly, he placed the frame back on his desk, his back turned. "I told her I wouldn't give up on the shop, but the truth is..."

Tadashi saw him clench his fist, and lowered his eyes. "You're feeling the crunch."

HoroHoro turned and forced a smile. "If sales don't improve by the end of the summer, I'm going to close down." He couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from falling as the smile became sad, then faded altogether.

"But isn't this a dream of yours? Something you've always wanted?"

He turned away, speaking in a voice so low Tadashi couldn't hear.

"...Some things aren't worth wrecking your marriage over."

**

* * *

**

The timer went off, and Tadashi turned the meat over in the marinade. He stabbed the length of it over and over again with a fork, making sure that the wine would flavor every last inch of it. He sighed, thinking about the people he had met that day and the problems each were facing. His hand wandered too close to the stove burners, and he jerked it away as it stung him. As he sucked on his finger, he tried to figure out if there was a way to help any of them.

_Masahiro and the boarding team need new equipment. Mr. Usui needs business... Jeez, if the budget wasn't so cheap, then they could just buy from him, and then everyone would be happy. If Mr. Usui had the money, he could just sponsor them. That way, they'd get their boards, and he'd get advertising. That'd be the ultimate deal. Too bad..._

The economy had gotten better within the past few years, but it still was nowhere near as good as it was during Japan's prime. A lot of people were still struggling financially. Tadashi knew he was lucky that, as the Chief of Police, his father had a hefty salary. He got an allowance, and worked once in a while at a bakery as a cashier (he couldn't write "Happy Birthday" on a cake to save his life), so he himself had money to spare.

As he ran his finger under some cold water from the sink, the mail sitting on the counter beside him caught his eye. The envelope that sat on top was addressed to him from Hokkaido Bank Ltd.

_That must be my statement. I haven't been spending all that much money lately, except for the subscription to _Goddess Sweets_. _

He picked it up after he dried his hands and opened it. Sure enough, inside were the statements for his checking and savings accounts. His savings had nearly seven hundred thousand yen, while his checking had about ninety thousand. He folded the papers up and returned them to the envelope.

That should have been the end, but he took the papers out again, studying them, the wheels in his head turning slowly at first, but gradually speeding up as the thoughts became clearer. He found his checkbook and put it in his bag.

"If they don't have the money," he said aloud, "then they need sponsors.

"If they can't sponsor each other, then they need to find people with money to throw around. Well, _I_ found _them_, but I'm going to sponsor both of them. Not for the boarding club. Not even for Mr. Usui's store, really."

He looked up at the fire place, where, next to the photo of his mother, was a picture of a sleeping Xue he had taken the night before.

"...I'm doing this for her."


	82. Turnaround

I know this mini-arc is longer than most flashbacks, but there really is a lot to cover. It's just easier to split them up when I feel it's right, not just keep rattling on for thirty pages D:

**Notes: I don't think I mentioned this before, but Xue's about 170cm tall, or 5'7".**

**

* * *

**

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Two: Turnaround**

**

* * *

**

Xue watched as her parents sat down next to each other at the dinner table. Her plan last night seemed to have worked. Her parents had bonded in their room, and she hoped that the fighting would stop for at least a few days. Maybe even a week if she was lucky. For now, she was going to savor this, and hope that she thought of another plan soon.

"Oh, Xue,"

She jumped, having been absorbed in her thoughts. "Hm? What is it, Daddy?"

"I met a kid from your school today. He helped me carry some boxes into the store."

She froze. No way. He wouldn't stalk her father to try to get on his good side, would he? "What did he look like?" she asked as she tried to casually eat her teriyaki.

HoroHoro rubbed his chin. "Well, let's see…He was about your height, a little taller, dark brown hair, kind of spiky…"

Xue had to concentrate so she wouldn't snap her chopsticks in half. He really WAS stalking her. He was going to get cozy with her father, who would then pressure her into considering going out with him, saying what a nice guy he was…

"Oh, that must've been Tadashi!" Seta exclaimed. "Yeah, we know him really well! He really likes Neesan a lot!"

"Seta! I thought we agreed not to mention that jerk outside of school!" she yelled.

Her brother blushed and covered his mouth. "Oops…Sorry Neesan…"

She sighed. "Honestly, I'd like to just be able to go through one day without having to deal with him…"

"Oh, so you _do_ know him," HoroHoro went on. "He said that he'd only seen you in the halls once or twice."

"We're not friends," she said curtly. "He's an obnoxious, sex-obsessed, pimpish jerk. It insults me that he's even interested in me."

"H-He's really not that bad!" Seta said, flailing. "He's teaching me all sorts of things, and none of them are bad! He's really nice on the inside!"

Rong sighed. "Just don't get sucked in. I won't stand for my son turning into a gigolo."

There was a beat of silence, then Xue and HoroHoro burst out laughing.

"Oh my gawd…That's the funniest image I've ever had!" his father cried.

"I know I know!" she cried quickly. She started miming the objects she was pretending to put on her brother. "We got some mean ice there, and a cigar, and a silk hat, sunglasses…"

"Don't forget the cane!"

"Oh hell, yes, the cane!" She mimed it, then pulled her wrist back. "'Bitch, where's my money?! Kechh!'" she said, making the sound effect of backhanding her brother in the face.

Seta sat there, his face beet red. He looked up at his mother, who finally let out a small smirk. He laughed weakly.

"Oh come on, Seta! You know we're just kidding!"

Another nervous laugh. "I think I'm going to do my homework. Thanks for dinner." He got up and put his dishes in the dishwasher.

_I wish Neesan would see Tadashi-senpai for who he really is._

**

* * *

**

The next day, as Seta passed the gates, a blur came and grabbed his arm, dragging him along. After nearly tripping and falling three times, he looked up to see who it was.

"T-Tadashi-senpai!"

The teen tried to give him a salute whilst holding his book bag. "Yo."

"Why did you ambush me like that?!"

"I forget how to get to your dad's store, so I decided you'd be my GPS!"

"My dad's store? Wait -- YOU skateboard?!"

He looked back and smirked. "I don't."

Seta looked at him in confusion. "So then why…"

They stopped. Tadashi didn't turn to look at him. "I feel bad about all the stress I've put on Xue lately. I thought maybe if I helped out your dad a little, then maybe she wouldn't have to shoulder so much responsibility."

"How do you plan to do that?"

He turned and grinned at him. "You'll see. But first, I need to get to the store. Will you take me there?"

Seta looked at the ground. His sister was so adamant about staying away from him that he was no good. But what if what he wanted to do would really help them? There would be no way of knowing unless he tried.

"Yeah…Okay…" He walked past him and began leading him to the family store.

Tadashi came up behind him and slapped him on the shoulder. "Thanks, pal! You won't regret this, I swear!"

"Uh-huh…"

"Just for this, I'll let you in on a little something."

He didn't seem excited. "What is it?"

"I'm going to tell you one of my secrets." He put his left arm around the boy's neck and yanked him closer. "The next time that girl comes to visit, get her a little gift or something. You know, to let her know that you missed her. Teddy bears work nicely, because then you can always say that she can hold it and think of you."

"D-Does that really work?"

He nodded with a smile. "If all else fails, just get her a single flower. Rose, daisy, carnation, whatever. It doesn't matter. Or get her something for her hair. How does she wear it, nowadays?"

"She's starting to put it in braided loops." He made ovals in the air next to his ears.

He smacked him on the back. "Bows. Ribbons. Something with one of those little characters girls like. Hair accessories can also make a girl even cuter than she is. If she's your age, then this is the perfect time for her to use them. In a couple years, she might not be into Miffy hair bands and earmuffs and all that jazz. See? I helped you, so you'll help me out now, won't you?"

Seta really couldn't say no. He knew he needed help in getting Lien to see him as more than just a childhood friend, and he couldn't wait until they were older. What if her parents got hasty and chose a fiancé for her? Then his chances were shot.

With a heavy sigh, he opened the door, the bells attached to the top signaled their arrival.

"Hey! How can I-…Oh, it's just you, Seta."

Seta watched his father slump back into the chair. He could tell it had been business as usual around the shop – meaning there had been next to none. He couldn't help feeling sorry for him. It must have been depressing putting your heart and soul into something you wanted, and having it not work out.

"Yo, Mr. Usui!"

HoroHoro looked up as Tadashi bounced up to the counter. "Oh, hey. Thanks again for your help yesterday."

Tadashi beamed. "It's no problem. I just need a favor from you, now."

The Ainu blinked at him. "Okay."

"A few of my friends are on the boarding team, and they need some new equipment. I was hoping you could show me which skateboards will be able to take the abuse the guys put them through. I was thinking of surprising them."

His face lit up. "Yeah, sure! Come on!" He practically yanked Tadashi around the store, picking out boards, wheels and trucks. "I was wondering why you came in here. I mean, no offense and all, but you don't really look like the skateboarding type, you know? Am I right?" He laughed and gave the boy a playful slap on the back, knocking the wind out of him.

"Y-Yes sir! AHAHAHAHA!"

Seta stared at them as they roared with laughter. Tadashi's was nervous, while he could tell his father was just on a high. He might actually make some money today.

When all was said and done, six skateboards, helmets, and pads where assembled before them. Both men looked satisfied.

"So, is your dad going to come pick these up later?"

Without looking at him, Tadashi chuckled and waved him off. "No, no, I'll just pay for them and take them now."

Silence.

"So, if you could just put them in a box or something to make them easier for me to truck home, I'd really appreciate it." He nonchalantly took out his checkbook. "How much was the total again?"

"O-One hundred fifty-seven thousand, two hundred and sixty-seven yen," he stammered out.

Tadashi breathed a sigh of relief. "Good, I have enough. Those price tags were starting to scare me." He wrote out the check, ripped it out, and handed it to the bewildered shop keeper. "There we go. Oh, hey, mind if I come back in a few minutes while you're packing the stuff up? I have to run an errand at a store right near here."

"S-Sure…"

"Awesome! I'll see you in a few minutes."

He watched HoroHoro turn his back and put the check in the cash register. Then he grabbed Seta and brought him out back, presumably to have him help with the packing. After they had disappeared, Tadashi quickly looked around, finding what he had been looking for – the store logo.

"Why hello there, gorgeous," he said sarcastically as he slipped the piece of heavy paper from under the clear plastic stand. "Here we go…" He looked around to make sure they couldn't see him, then slipped out of the store.

As he sauntered down the street, he realized that the size of each team member might become an issue. Oh well, he'd just have to estimate.

A young lady looked up as he entered the store. "Welcome, sir. How may I help you today?"

He nodded in greeting. "Do you guys print shirts?"

She smiled. "Yes, of course. Is there a particular design or image you would like on it?"

"As a matter of fact, there is." He held up the paper. "I need about ten blue shirts with this on it. Five each in men's small and medium."

The woman happily took it. "Of course!" She scuttled over to the counter and came back with a form. "If you could just fill this out, I could have them ready in about five days."

He grimaced. He had been hoping they would be ready sooner, since his excitement was eating away at him, but he knew there was little he could do. He filled it out and handed it to the associate, trading it for the sales receipt. Over thirty thousand yen.

_Ouch._

All the same, he signed the slip and handed it back to her. She took it and bowed.

"Thank you for your patronage. Your order should be completed in about five days. We'll call you when it's ready to be picked up."

He nodded. "Thank you. I'll be looking forward to it."

When he was on the street again, he looked at his cell phone to check the time. "Crap. That took a lot longer than I thought it would. They're probably waiting there for me."

He was grateful that it was only a short jog back to the shop, but he could see Seta and HoroHoro sitting around and twiddling their thumbs. They could have just closed the store and made him wait until tomorrow, but there they were. He burst in, panting slightly as he saluted them.

"Sorry to make you guys wait. That little errand of mine took longer than I expected it to."

HoroHoro gleefully stood up. "Don't worry about it! It's fine!"

Seta couldn't blame his father for being so excited. He knew that once Rong found out about their big sale that day, the fighting might stop for a little while. Despite his sister's efforts to conceal their parents' conflict, he had heard them yelling anyway. He could see it on Xue's face every time she would pass him in the hall after creatively routing an argument. He could tell she was stressed, and he worried that she would soon be at her limit.

"Are you going to carry all of this home?" his father asked in a slightly nervous voice.

Tadashi laughed. "No. I borrowed one of my dad's cars so I wouldn't have to worry about it. If I'm paying all this money, I might as well take care of the stuff, right?"

The redhead watched them as they laughed again. _This is getting creepy…_

"Seta, will you help carry this stuff to Tadashi's car?" his father asked.

"Yeah, sure."

They each grabbed a box and loaded it into the trunk. As Tadashi shut it, he sighed with relief. "Thanks for your help, Mr. Usui. My friends really needed this stuff."

"Don't mention it! Feel free to come back if you need anything else," he replied.

The boy smiled. "Thanks, I will."

After he had gotten into his car and driven off and the father and son had returned to the shop, HoroHoro leaped into the air with glee.

"That was great! Wait until Rong hears about this! She'll be so proud of me!" He jumped around a little more as he made his way to the door to lock it, acting like a kid who had just gotten a good report card.

Seta couldn't blame him, really. Sales had been slow, to say the least. This thousand that had been made today was what they might make in a week if they were lucky. He couldn't help but smile. At least his dad was happy.

* * *

A week had passed since his big shopping day, and Tadashi was eager give out his gifts. He rounded up the boarding club and led them to his car.

"You're not planning on abducting us or some sick thing, are you?" the captain, Hiro, groaned. He obviously wasn't about to believe that some preppy boy was going to hand them gear for free. No one these days was that generous.

"Nah, of course not. I'm not into guys." He opened the trunk and took out one of the large boxes. After he had set it on the ground, the group stared at it. "Go on, open it."

After narrowing his eyes, the captain stooped down and unfolded the flaps. He took out one of the skateboards as his teammates let out sounds of wonder and amazement. Their leader, however, did not seem pleased.

"What's all this?"

Tadashi smirked. "New gear, just for you guys. Top of the line and hella expensive."

The captain frowned. "I don't like charity."

"Maybe not, but I don't think you like having broken boards, either. It's your choice."

He was silent, thinking of a reason not to accept this sudden gift. "I don't want to support that sellout boarding store in the plaza. They don't care about boards or what skating's all about. All they care about is money."

Tadashi blinked at him quizzically. "What? No, no, no! These aren't from some franchise, if that's what you're thinking. They're from a small store on the side of town. It's owned by the dad of one of the students here."

Hiro let the argument die. "Why even help us?"

Tadashi looked away from him. "That shop, the one I bought all this stuff at, is in danger of closing, and it's causing the owner's daughter a lot of stress. I figured if I did you guys a favor and bought you this stuff, you'd be willing to do me one."

Hiro narrowed his eyes. "What do you want?"

"Heh…" Tadashi reached into the trunk and tossed a ball of black cloth at him. "Catch."

He did and unfolded it. "What's this?"

"That's the store I bought this gear at. If you and the guys wear those to competitions and stuff, then I'm sure the advertising will pull in a few customers. You get your gear, the store gets customers, the daughter stops being stressed…" _And I rise to the occasion and snatch her. _ "…everyone's happy, ne?"

Hiro studied the equipment. Finally, he looked up. "Fine, we'll accept this stuff, and we'll wear the shirts sometimes. We still have actual uniforms, you know."

"Yeah, I know, but I bet if you wear them and win, it'll be good for the store. You probably will only need to wear them a few times depending on how good you are."

The captain scowled at him. "Don't insult my team. We're good. Pretty DAMN good as a matter of fact." He grinned deviously. "We'll get those sales up, just you wait. You'll be bowing before our supremely awesome boarding skills."

Tadashi pumped his fist. "That's what I'm talking about! Now come on, guys, there's plenty for all of you!"

He watched the boards, pads, and shirts get distributed amongst the boys, a satisfied smile on his face. As they were about to leave, Hiro approached him, stiffly offering his hand. Tadashi shook it. They nodded at each other, then parted.

When they were gone, Tadashi went back into the trunk and pulled out some small posters. Each had the store logo on it, along with the address, and referenced the fact that the boarding team's equipment was bought there.

"Once I hang these up, the people will start coming. Xue's sure to be happy then. She'll have no choice but to fall in love with me!" He suavely touched his forehead. "Tadashi, you're a fucking genius." After basking in his own greatness, he grabbed the stack and started putting the fliers up around town.

* * *

A couple weeks later, Xue took out her phone during lunch, which was vibrating like mad.

"Dad?" she said as she looked at the caller ID, confused. _He knows better than to call me at school. _"Hey, Daddy. What's up?"

"Xue, I know I haven't had you do this in a long time, but I need you to rush to the store after you get home from school," he said on the other end, his voice almost desperate.

She didn't say anything. She could hear noise in the background. She swallowed. "Is it busy there?"

"Like you wouldn't believe. I thought your mom was going to have a heart attack when I told her I needed her to come home and help me." Xue could hear him turn and tell a customer he'd be right with them. "Okay Xue. Just try to get here as soon as soon as you can, okay?"

"Sure, Dad."

"See you when you get here. Bye!" He hung up without waiting for her to say anything.

It took a few seconds for the silence to kick in before Xue closed her phone. Her father needed her to work at the shop? It was _busy_?! She smiled as she tapped her chin lightly the top of the phone. Maybe now she wouldn't have to think of another plan for a while.

* * *

As she stepped into the store, Xue gazed in awe at how many people where browsing. The store was quite small, but at least ten or fifteen people had fit themselves inside. HoroHoro called out to her from behind the counter and she went over to him.

"Do you remember how to use the register?" he asked.

"Yeah."

"Good. Now, if you could just ring people up while I go around and make sure people don't have any questions about what they're buying, it'd really help me out."

She smiled. "Sure thing, Daddy."

He smiled back, then grabbed her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug. "Things might finally be starting to look up," he said quietly.

"Hehe. See? I told you that if you kept trying that it'd work out eventually," she said as she hugged him back.

He murmured a few things, then went off to help his customers. She watched him smile and give advice to girl about her age, then went behind the counter to work the register.

A young man came up with a skateboard and some shoes, and she rang him up, making sure to smile and bow as he left, thanking him for his patronage and hoping that he'd come again. After he had left, she continued to stare at the ground, her father's words echoing in her ears.

"_I just hope it's not too late._"

* * *

"Nice job, Xue. Thanks again for your help."

She looked over her shoulder and smiled at him as she flipped the door's sign to "Closed" and locked it. "No problem, Daddy."

For the past week, Xue had been running home from school, changing out of her uniform, and then rushing back out to her father's store. Then sudden surge of customers had left them both perplexed, but neither complained. The steady profit had put a stopper on Rong's normally harsh tongue, and there had been no major conflicts since then. They exchanged kisses when they came home, another when HoroHoro would thank her for dinner and help her clean up, and still more when they went to bed. It seemed as though, at least for now, that their marriage was safe.

She went back over to her father and watched him count the money that was in the register. He put it in a zippered pouch then printed out a long receipt, ripped it off, and skipped to the bottom.

"Another awesome day," he said as he folded it up. With a happy sigh, he went into the back to put the earnings in the safe.

Xue was about to follow him when she heard knocking on the window. She turned to see Seta with his face pressed against the glass and holding up a blue piece of paper that was unreadable from where she was. He jiggled the door handle, signaling for her to let him in. Mere seconds after she had turned the lock, she was on the floor, having been toppled by the excited boy.

"What is this all about?" she asked, not even bothering to push him off her.

"I-I found this on the bulletin board in the drug store! Look!" He stuck it in her face.

"I can't read it when you do that."

"Sorry!" He pulled it back so she could see it clearly.

"Hey…that's—,"

"--That's my logo…"

The children looked up to see HoroHoro standing over them. He held out his hand and Seta quickly gave the flier to him.

"I don't believe this," he whispered. "Is _this_ the reason why we've been so busy lately?" The paper flapped as he turned it over to make sure there was nothing on the back, which there wasn't. He read it again. "Who could have done this? It wasn't either of you, was it?"

They shook their heads.

He glanced at it again before shrugging. "Oh well! It'd be nice to know who our little sponsor is, but I'm not going to complain about all the business we're getting! I mean, we can afford to go out to eat at least once a week! And now Mom doesn't have to get a job! We're all set!"

Seta finally jumped off his sister. "YEAH!"

Xue rolled over onto her stomach and watched her father and brother dance around the store. This was a wonderful turn of events of course, but she didn't want to bank on it being a permanent thing. She couldn't stand to look at her father's heartbroken face again.

* * *

Tadashi tapped his pencil on his binder impatiently. It was a week before the fire festival, and Xue wasn't in the palm of his hand like he had hoped she would be. She was more cheerful than most had ever seen her, but she hadn't said a word to him.

_How could she not tell that I'm the one responsible for getting the word out about her dad's store? I thought it would be obvious!_ _I guess I'm going to have to take this into my own hands._

After he had been freed by the chiming of the afternoon bell, he packed up his things and headed out. In the courtyard, he spied Xue running toward the gate and raised his arm in a wave.

"Xue!"

She turned, hopping like a prized boxer, and waved back at him, then continued running. He flailed and started running, not wanting to lose her attention.

"W-Wait! I have something I need to talk to you about!"

"Sorry! I'm in a rush!" she called without turning around again. "I need to go help my dad!"

Tadashi skidded to a stop, allowing her to vanish from his sight. This was all his doing. He had seen her running through the gates day after day, but it had never occurred to him that it was because of how he had promoted the store that she was rushing around. He didn't know whether to be happy or sad. Happy, because she was, and his plan had worked in the Usuis' benefit; sad, because it wasn't working to his.

"Yo, man!"

He turned to see Zegen, Himo, and Gyuu coming up behind him.

"Hey."

Zegen brought his hand down on his friend's shoulder roughly. "So, who's your date for the fire festival? It's Konomi, isn't it? I saw her looking at you in English when the teacher made you read out loud."

Tadashi mumbled.

"Eh? What?"

"I said I don't have a date yet."

The three boys stared at him. Zegen smiled nervously.

"What do you mean you don't have a date? Dude, the festival is less than a week away. If you wait too long, all the 'hot' ones are going to get taken, and you'll get stuck with a 'not', and that'd just suck for you."

"Yeah, what are you waiting for?!"

"I bet you could just go up to a random girl right now and ask her to go with you, and she'd jump for joy!"

Tadashi sighed. "No. I'm waiting to see if I can get Xue to go with me."

A beat of silence. Zegen clearly wasn't amused.

"What."

"I've worked too hard to back out now, so I might as well just keep going."

Tadashi looked up to see that his friend had walked up to look him in the eye, their noses almost touching. "We put a cap on three weeks," he said in a low voice. "So, you have until next week to find a new girl – one that isn't a batshit crazy beanstalk."

His friend looked surprised, then frowned. "And what if I don't?"

Zegen smirked. "We'll remove her from the equation ourselves."

"What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Do as I say and you won't need to find out."

Before his friend could say anything, he walked past him, the other two boys cautiously following.

Tadashi didn't know what to make of this. Was Zegen serious? Or was this just a scare tactic to get him back into his old routine? Either way, the choice was easy.

"I'll protect her."


	83. Can't Stop Staring

I'm really sorry, everyone. Really, I am. This wasn't fair at all and I'll understand if some of you gave up. It's been over four months without an update, and I can only attribute that to my laziness and my lack of direction during a certain part of this chapter. I'm already hard at work on 84, so I'm hoping to be a little steadier in my updating.

I'm sure you're probably sick of this flashback, but 84 will be the last full flashback chapter, with some of 85 further explaining Xue's regression. After that, we can get back to the main plot and finish this slushpuppy.

**Notes: A "poi" is the tiny paper-paddle thing used in goldfish scooping at Japanese festivals.**

"**Geta" are the wooden sandals traditionally worn with yukata.**

**And strawberry Calpico is the best drink in the world. That's all you need to know.**

**

* * *

**

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Three: Can't Stop Staring**

**

* * *

**

"You can go home if you want, Xue. I'm fine closing the shop. Besides, you look beat. Go home and take a nap."

Xue nodded groggily and fell against the glass door, pushing it open. She mumbled a "Thank you," before stumbling outside.

"Heeeeeyy!"

She looked up to see Tadashi standing next to a lamppost and smiling at her.

"Hey," she said flatly. She was exhausted; she didn't have the strength to deal with his shenanigans. "I'd love to stay and chat, but I need to go home. I have a lot of homework to do." She started to walk away.

"Wait! Don't go yet!"

She groaned and turned around. "What is it now?"

He was reaching out to her, unsure of what to say. "Uh...Le...Let...That's right! Let me take you out to dinner!"

She waved him away and turned around. "I don't have the energy for this..."

Flustered, he ran after her and got in front of her, blocking her path. "I have something I need to tell you, and I swear to whatever's up there that I'll explode if I don't get it out!"

She went around him. "That's nice. I better get away, then. Don't want my clothes to get messed up."

He ran after her again and knelt down, his hand clasped together, pleading with her. "PLEASE! Xue, just give me a chance!"

She looked at him in disdain. "Haven't I made it clear that tonight is not a good night?"

"Saturday, then! Just please, let me do something nice for you!"

"Why do this at all? All the other girls at school would be dying to have you spoil them rotten, then dump them like a rotten dumpling. So why me?"

"I-I just need to tell you that...thing...and I want to celebrate...uh...how well your dad's store is doing!"

Xue studied him, then sighed, relenting. "Fine, fine, I give up. I'll let you take me out on Saturday as long as I'm not working."

Tadashi smiled. "Awesome! I'll pick you up around two. I promise you won't regret this!" He sprinted down the street in the opposite direction.

Xue slowly turned and continued walking down the street toward home. "I think I already am."

**

* * *

**

"So, where are we going?"

"I knew you wouldn't want any place too ritzy, so I thought we'd go to that new cafe everyone's talking about. I figured it'd have something for you."

She watched him mosey over to the hostess, who smiled and giggled like they were old friends. Impatient, Xue folded her arms and looked around.

_He drags me out here, then goes over and flirts with the freaking hostess._ _I swear I'm going to leave him dead at the table._

Tadashi came back and grabbed her arm, leading her to a booth near the window. "You looked like you were spacing out. You okay?"

"I'm fine," she snapped as she sat down and took the menu from the hostess, who gave her a hostile glare. "Seems like you have another admirer, you lady killer, you," she said after the woman had left.

Tadashi shrugged innocently. "Just the sister of an ex, that's all."

She scoffed at him and banged her menu up to stand on end, creating a wall between them. _The sooner I order, the sooner I can get out._

Without giving her a chance to look over the menu, Tadashi pulled it down and pointed to one of the beverage choices, the Chuutti Fruutti.

"This one's really good if you're into fruity drinks. I think you'd like it."

Xue's eye twitched as she tried to hold in her annoyance. "Thanks. I'll keep that in mind." _I'm fully capable of choosing my own drink, thankyouverymuch._

"Can I start you off with a drink?" the server asked after introducing himself.

"Strawberry Calpico," Xue said quickly. She eyed her would-be date as a silent warning, telling him that she wouldn't order anything he recommended.

Tadashi returned her glance calmly, then his eyes returned to his menu. "Then I'll just have a bubble tea, thanks."

"Got it. I'll be right back."

After the server left, Tadashi began humming as he flipped through the entrees. She glared at him, waiting for him to make a suggestion and further exasperate her.

But he didn't. He glanced up and noticed her harsh eyes yet again, but smiled anyway. "Know what you're ordering already?"

She softened, realizing he had gotten the message the first time, a very odd occurrence considering their short history together. Quietly, she looked at her options. "Yeah, I think so."

Tadashi managed to engage her in limited small talk until their food arrived. Her body was still stiff, and he was hoping that she would let her guard down eventually. He would have to bide his time for that to happen.

As they silently ate, he finally saw her shoulders relax. After she had swallowed a few more bites of her smoked salmon and broccoli salad, he made his move.

"So I hear your dad's store has been doing pretty well lately."

Xue smiled inwardly. "Yeah. He's worked really hard for this. I'm happy for him."

He tilted his head at her knowingly. "Any clue why it got so popular all of a sudden?"

She shrugged. "Who cares? We have a steady flow of income now, so I'm not going to question anything."

Tadashi pulled out one of his fliers and set it on the table between them. She looked at it quizzically, then picked it up and examined it.

"This is the ad that Seta found...So what? What are you trying to prove?"

"I was the one who put them up," he said nonchalantly.

Behind the paper, Xue was biting the inside of her lip so hard that the taste of blood was filling her mouth. "Oh, so it was you?"

"Yeah." He nearly sighed at what a wonderful human being he was as he set the small stack on receipts on the table. "There's your proof, in case you wanted any."

She looked at the slips of paper, then reluctantly picked them up and leafed through them. Her face didn't give the slightest hint of emotion. She certainly didn't seem as grateful as Tadashi had imagined.

"Why?"

"Why did I do it? I just thought I'd lend a helping hand, since your family's kind of poor, right? I mean, you live in an apartment, so you can't be all that well off. And that store's always so deserted since there's that huge celebrity-endorsed one in the square. Jeez, what was your dad thinking when he set up shop so close to an already well-known store? It makes no sense!"

Xue had by now crumpled up the flier and was continuing to compact it again and again in her hands.

"I just saw it as a golden opportunity to show you what a nice guy I am. Speaking of which, the bonfire festival is just around the corner, so I was wondering if you'd--"

His face was splashed with ice-cold water. He could feel the ice landing in his lap, some of it hitting the floor. Xue was giving him the most lethal glare he had ever seen. She slammed the cup down and leaned over the small circular table until their noses were almost touching.

"Now that I've finally gotten you to shut up, I'm going to let you in on something," she said in a low whisper.

Tadashi shivered under her gaze, unsure if he was cold or terrified.

"My family doesn't need help from a spoiled brat like you. Papa would have made the store known in his own way. He would've refused any help you offered. My family has something you don't, something that's so beyond your brain capacity that you could never understand it. You know what that is?"

"W-What?"

"Pride. We do things our own way. We don't let others own us in any way; we never owe anyone anything. You thought you could buy me by spending all this money to "help" Papa, that you could get to me through him. You wanted me to owe you a favor so you could get your way like a spoiled child and make me go out with you. Feel free to stop me if I've misunderstood anything. I want to make sure this little game of yours has an accurate play-by-play."

He was almost afraid to speak. "I don't think this is a game! I really do want you, Xue! I really do!"

"You 'want' me?" she asked, trying to sense which usage of the word he meant.

"I really do! You have no idea how much I want you!"

The last thing he felt was her hand slamming his head onto the table, while the other shoved ice down the back of his shirt. As he squirmed, she stomped past him.

"For the last time, stay away from me, from Seta, from my dad, and don't you dare try to talk to my mom. She eats boys like you for breakfast."

The waitress passed Xue on her way to check up on the table. Confused, she tilted her head at Tadashi, who was now motionless, his head still on the table's glass surface.

"Tadashi? What happened?" she asked.

"Not as planned," he murmured.

"What?"

"I'll just have that check when you get the chance."

"Yes, of course." She pulled the small faux leather folder from her apron and placed it on the table. She nervously bowed and quickly walked away.

With a heavy sigh, Tadashi finally lifted his head and took out his wallet. As he counted the bills, a small group of boys outside the cafe caught his eye. They were snickering to each other and glancing at one of the street corners.

Xue was leaning against a nearby building, tapping away at her cell phone. She frowned and closed it, the sighed as she ran a hand through her hair. When she stood and began her trek home, the three boys advanced toward her, and that was when Tadashi could clearly make out Zegen between two members of the rugby team.

"Oh God...he actually did it. I thought he was joking when he said he'd go after Xue. I never thought...Shit..." He dropped the money on the table and jumped over the metal fence of the outside dining area.

The boys tapped Xue on the shoulder, then sucker punched her before dragging her into the alley next to them. When Tadashi reached them, Xue had been tossed against the wall. Her eyes were slightly open, but she looked unaware of the situation.

"What are going to do with her?"

"Don't know. Didn't think ahead that far."

"Can't we beat her or cut her up or something?"

"Well, I guess that's an idea. She _is_ kinda tall for a girl. She could use to lose a few centimeters. Anyone got a knife?"

"Yeah, I do. Right here."

"Dude, the blades all rusted! That shit's dangerous!"

"It's the only one I've got!"

"Shut up, you idiots. It'll do the job." Zegen sneered. "Hope Miss Amazon has had her tetanus shot."

"HEY!"

They turned to see a winded Tadashi standing at the mouth of the alleyway. His friend smirked.

"You're not surprised, right? I warned you about what would happen if you didn't get with the program and start acting the way you used to. This is what happens when you don't listen."

He was still panting from his frantic sprint from the cafe. "If you want to beat someone up so badly, beat _me_ up, but leave Xue out of this! It's not her fault I've been chasing her around so much! She doesn't even like me!"

"Exactly! You should've moved on by now, found a new target! But nooooo! You insisted on this scrub _because_ she hates you, and you're used to getting everything you want! You've abandoned the group, Tadashi, and that's a very bad thing."

"Fine! I'm a traitor! Cut me up if you want! Just don't touch her!"

The boy sighed. "Guys, cut her up."

"You bastards!"

Tadashi ran and jumped on the back of the boy with the knife, but he received a light slash across the chest. The other flunkie gave him a left hook to the cheek, knocking him to the ground. The knife was aimed at him again, and he tried to move out of its way. It stabbed him in the left shoulder. With a cry of pain, he flopped onto the ground. His vision blurred as he heard the boys sound off in agony.

"You're crazy!" Zegen cried.

"If you're going to try to beat me up, at least have the balls to confront me. The sucker punch makes you look like a bunch of weaklings. And I'm content with my height, thankyouverymuch."

"Everyone else thinks you're a freak!"

"That's nice, but I must ask that you cite your sources."

"One of those girls in your group I dated, she said the same thing! Everyone thinks you're just freakish bastard baby of a chink and an Ainu. They only pretend to be friends with you because they're scared of you! No one at the school really likes you!"

"Interesting. Anything else? You haven't told me how bad this outfit looks on me yet."

"Step out of line once, then you'll see what everyone really thinks of you!"

"Alright, that's enough. My IQ's dropped enough for one day."

Tadashi heard a falsetto from his former friend, making it obvious how Xue had chosen to shut him up. The fuzzy image of her kneeling beside him appeared a few moments later.

_She has really nice legs..._

"This is probably all your fault, but you kind of made up for it. You really suck at coming to the rescue, you know. But...you still bought me some time. So...thanks."

He gurgled in reply.

She carelessly flipped him over. "Holy shit. That's not good. God, how reckless can you be?"

He felt her put him on her back, his eyes still glazed over. _Her hair...It smells like vanilla..._ He heard some beeping.

"Yeah, the date was fine. No, it wasn't a real date, I just called it that for the sake of simplicity. Anyway, he managed to get himself stabbed, so I'm taking him to the hospital. Yeah, I'm fine, he just sucks at fighting. Yeah, okay. I'll see you later. I love you, too. Bye."

Xue grunted and put her cellphone back in her pocket. "Alright, weakling, let's get you fixed up."

**

* * *

**

Tadashi awoke to the sight of Xue sitting in a chair beside his bed, calmly reading what seemed to be an assigned text for school. He knew it was wrong, rude, and would probably put him in the ICU, but he was mesmerized by how calm she looked. He couldn't stop staring at her.

She suddenly turned her head to check up on him, then jumped when she saw that he was ogling her.

"You surprised me!" she cried, arms flailing. "And what are you doing staring at me, anyway? You'd better not be undressing me with your eyes, I swear..."

"I wasn't," he replied truthfully.

She sighed, choosing not to argue. She looked at him again, her eyes slightly softened. "How are you feeling?"

It was only then that he noticed the stinging in his shoulder. He lifted up the sheet a little to see a patch of gauze taped to his skin. Unable to tame a flash of dumb curiosity, he poked it, causing him to twitch and let out a pained noise.

"You idiot. Why'd you want to poke it? You're like a little kid poking a dead cat with a stick." She walked over to the left side of his bed and mercilessly ripped the tape off.

"OW!! For the love--!! Be gentle with me! I'm injured!" he wailed.

"Oh, put a sock in it, you big cry baby," she said as she opened a nearby drawer. She put some clear jelly on a large cotton swab and gently painted the wound with it.

Tadashi shuddered as the cold gel touched his skin. He finally glanced over to see that his wounded shoulder had been sewn up.

"You..." He finally looked around and saw the white walls, the plastic curtain, and smelled the "clean" scent of a hospital. "You brought me here?"

"Of course I did," she said, as if it were a stupid question. "I couldn't just leave you there. Especially since you got stabbed because I let my guard down."

He looked guilty. "Actually, Xue, they did it beca--"

"I know, I heard. Just another reason why you should've just left me alone."

"Yeah...Sorry..."

"Whatever. I got my revenge. I'm happy."

They were silent as Xue put a fresh pad of gauze on the stitches and taped him back up again. She turned to put everything back and throw away the dirty gauze, then washed her hands when she was done.

"I'll...go to that festival with you."

Tadashi's head shot up. "What?"

"I said, I'll go to that bonfire festival with you."

He blinked, then a huge smile spread across his face.

"But I'm not buying the yukata, so you'll have to flaunt that fancy wallet of yours again."

"I can do that."

"And I don't usually go to things like this, so I don't know the dance."

"That's fine, you can learn it there."

"You'd better make sure I have fun. I don't want this to be a waste of my time."

"Don't worry, I'll make sure you do."

"And this is **NOT** a date, got it? I just figure you'll leave me alone if you spend more time with me. Maybe you'll realize that I'm not worth spending all this money on." She snapped her head away. "Just keep in mind that if you _do_ end up realizing that this was a bad investment, I won't be giving you a refund of ANY sort."

"That's fine, I know I'll be even more in love with you when the festival's over."

She felt her cheeks burn up.

"Idiot..."

**

* * *

**

"Alright, turn around."

Xue obeyed and her mother began to tie the bow in the back of her yukata. Tadashi had delivered a high-quality robe and obi a few days before, which Xue had immediately thrown in the corner. It wasn't until Seta had once again blabbed at the dinner table that her parents were aware of her date.

"It's not a date!" she cried as she angrily closed her tube of mascara. Makeup wasn't usually her thing, but her friends had made her promise that she would wear a little bit, if only just to amuse them. "It's a solution that will get him to leave me alone!"

When Seta heard this, he gave her a worried look. "Neesan, please tell me you aren't going to intentionally make him regret asking you. Even if you don't like him, he's still a human being with feelings. I don't want him to get hurt when he's trying to be nice to you."

She paused for a moment, using the mirror in front of her to meet his eyes. "I promise I won't. I don't need to. I'm confident that if he spends enough time around me, he'll get sick of me and leave me alone."

"What if he doesn't?"

She froze. The thought had never occurred to her. Slowly, she continued to pull her hair back in a clip. "Don't be silly. If I was that desirable, Ha...I mean...I would've had a boyfriend by now."

"Neesan..."

The doorbell rang. After another brief pause, Xue attached some silk flowers to the clip and studied herself. Her eyes drifted to the ground. "What have I gotten myself into?"

"Why not honestly give him a chance and try to have fun?" Rong said as she walked in. "I never got the chance to go to a festival like this, so go have fun for me."

She was referring to the private tutoring she received during the time she was watching over Pin-Mei. Unlike her master, she never attended a public school, and thus never had friends outside of Xu/Fan Castle, nor interacted with others in an enjoyable setting.

"Mom…"

"Just try, alright? That's all I'm asking. I wasn't too keen on your father when I first met him, either."

"Mom! Ew! Come on! I don't want to go out with this guy! He's such a womanizer! And he reads shoujo manga! You hear me? S-H-O-U-J-O M-A-N-G-A!"

"And? Your father used to suck his thumb in his sleep."

"HEY!" came a shout from the hall.

"Don't deny it, Aokun!" Rong yelled back. She put her hands on her daughter's shoulders. "Promise me that you'll loosen up for one night. You've been way too uptight for the past few months. You need to enjoy being a student. You'll regret it if you don't."

Xue made a small noise of acknowledgement.

"Ladies, if you're done gossiping, Tadashi's been waiting for about five minutes!" HoroHoro called.

"Alright!" Rong turned back to Xue. "Promise?"

After a few moments, she nodded.

"I guess it'll have to do. Go on, have some fun."

Xue walked down the hall as slowly as she possibly could, until a forceful push came from behind her and she stumbled into the living room. She looked behind her to see Rong smiling at her brightly.

"You look even better than I thought you would."

She turned back around to see Tadashi with a more sincere smile on his face. He touched one of her sleeves. Like the rest of the yukata, it was adorned with falling leaves on a navy blue background, with graceful silver and gold lines mixed in.

"I knew these colors would be perfect for you."

"Thanks…" she mumbled when a tight pinch was felt on her back.

"You guys better get going. The festival's already started," Seta said.

Tadashi looked at his watch. "Oh wow! He's right!" He turned to HoroHoro. "Here's my cell phone number. I'll bring her back around eleven. Is that alright?"

"That sounds okay," the Ainu replied. Rong took the slip of paper from her husband's hand and clipped it next to their bulletin board. "Jeez, Rong! Don't you trust me?"

"Not when it comes to losing things." She put her hand on Xue's head. "Remember, you promised."

"I know, I know! Can we just go now?!"

"Of course!" He motioned to hold her hand, but she evaded. Trying to ignore it, he turned it into an exaggerated beckoning gesture. "¡Vamos!"

"…What?"

"He basically said, 'Let's go!'" Rong, the multilingual wonder chimed in.

Tadashi pulled Xue out the door, which was slammed shut behind them. When Xue heard a distinct click, she knew her parents had locked her out. There was no choice but to suck it up. Make lemonade. Build a bridge. Put her head between her legs and breathe.

_This bastard better not expect me to do that for him. If he does, I'll kill him, I swear…_

"Are you okay with walking?"

"Hm?"

"I didn't bring my car since I figured you'd like me to spare the pollution."

"That's fine." _Alright, he gets a point for that._

"Oh, and I got you one of those little bag things." He held up a silk drawstring pouch.

"Those are usually only used during New Year's or some other big festival. Not some school one," she said curtly.

"W-Well…I just thought you'd like to put your money in something."

"I didn't bring any. You're paying for everything."

"Oh, that's right. I'll just hold onto it for you, then."

They started walking toward their school in silence. Though Xue was doing her best to ignore him, he kept stealing glances at her. It got to the point where she couldn't take it anymore.

"Would you stop gawking at me?!" she cried. "I'm so sick of it! You're definitely thinking about nasty things!"

"Nope. It's just hard to take my eyes off something so beautiful. Sorry, I'm just mesmerized."

She grumbled and quickly turned her head away from him to hide a reluctant blush. "Why do you keep saying things like that? What's so great about the way I look?"

He made a thinking sound, then smiled. "You look different from any other girl I've seen. You're so exotic. Your skin's so soft. You're so loyal to your family. From the photo your dad had of you in his shop, I can tell that you're athletic, and you can kick anyone's ass. Something about that, how strong you are, is just so sexy to me."

"Those have nothing to do with my appearance."

"Oh, you're right. Sorry, just got carried away. I mean, your outward appearance is just a small part of it. You're a beautiful person inside, too."

She paused, thinking about what he had just implied.

"For the last time, what's so beau—"

"Here at last!"

She looked up to see the gates of her school, surrounded by bright lanterns and stalls. Smells of dangos and okonomiyaki filled the air. She couldn't help but smile.

"Hey! Xue! Over here!"

Xue turned and saw Chuuko waving to her from their group of friends. Her friend's smile wavered slightly when she saw who she was with, but tried to recover as she walked over to them.

"I never thought I'd see you in a yukata, much less with makeup on, Xue," Chuuko said. She felt the fabric. "Wow, that's expensive! How did your family afford this?"

"We didn't."

"What? Did you steal it or something?"

"No." She used her thumb to gesture over her shoulder at Tadashi. "This guy was so bent on taking me, so I said I might go if he paid for everything. Then Seta opened his big mouth and let my parents know about it, so here we are."

Chuuko clapped her hands. "Your first date! Oh, Xue, I'm so happy for you!"

"It's not a date! I'm just letting him spend money on me and waste a Friday night. We're not going out!"

"If you say so…"

"ARGH!!" She angrily turned to Tadashi. "See what you've done?! Rumors are starting! No one's going to believe me now!"

He grinned. "Well, you know, we could always just make the rumors true…"

"You wish, Tadashi! YOU! WISH!!"

He leaned in to her. "You're right. I do."

She pushed him away. "Go get me a drink or something. Just get out of my face for a little while."

"Certainly, Princess," he cheerfully ran off into the crowd.

Xue sighed. "I really wish I hadn't come here."

"Um, Xue?"

She turned to see Sashi looking at her with sad eyes. "Sashi, hi. Hey…What's wrong?"

Almost immediately, her friend started crying. Xue took a small piece of cloth from her obi and gently patted her eyes, fruitlessly trying to salvage the girl's makeup.

"…da…shi…" she whimpered.

Xue's face instantly hardened. "What? What'd he do to you? I'll beat the shit out of him for you."

Sashi shook her head. "I miss him…I miss what we had…"

"What?" Her friend laughed nervously. "You can't really mean you still have feelings for that playboy. Sashi, he's not worth it, honestly! You can do so much better!"

She didn't seem to hear her. "I'm so jealous of you…You're the one he likes now…It's not fair!"

"Hey, hey…" Xue hugged her. "I'm not going out with him. Maybe once I reject him and he gets the message, you'll get another chance, if you like him so much. What do you even see in him?"

"Xue…" Sashi whispered. "As much as I hate this, and how much I miss him…I want you to be with him."

"Wait, WHAT?!" She pulled the girl away to see that she was smiling weakly. "You don't understand! He's everything I hate about men! That pompous, spoiled, annoying son of a bitch! He just wants me to be another notch in his belt! He wants to have sex with me so he can brag about it!"

"No, no, you really have it all wrong! I mean…" Her voice became a whisper. "We fooled around a little, yeah…but we never had sex. He didn't want to. He said he wasn't ready yet."

"That's boy talk for, 'I have a tiny dick.'" She giggled to herself.

Sashi blushed even more. "N-No! It wasn't that at all!"

Xue cocked an eyebrow at her.

"I mean…He really is very sweet once you get to know him, Xue, really he is! Just let him spoil you…he loves doing that." The small smile she had faded. "He recently told me again that he doesn't intend to get back together. So…just don't make this all be for nothing. This is selfish, I know, but please, even just for tonight, make him happy? For me?"

Her friend looked at her, then at the ground. She bit her lip as she thought.

"Xue, are you afraid? Did another boy make you this insecure?"

"_Isn't it more fun just to be friends? Hehe…"_

"No, of course not." But she could feel the small lump in her throat. She tried to dispel that memory from her mind, if only for a moment.

"Hey, Princess! I'm back!"

She looked up to see Tadashi jogging back to her. He handed her a bottle of Calpico and a small fruit bowl. Her eyes caught his attention.

"What's wrong?"

Sashi cleared her throat and he shifted his gaze.

"Oh…Sashi…Hi…"

She nodded, unable to say anything back.

"Been doing okay?" He was forcing a smile.

"Y-Yeah…" she whispered. She covered her mouth as her eyes filled up with tears again.

"Sashi…" Xue whispered, motioning to comfort her again.

But the girl put up a hand to stop her as she began backing away. "Have a good evening…Have fun…"

"You too. Take care." Xue tried to smile.

The girl nodded, and, after one last longing look at the man behind her friend, disappeared into the crowd. They stared after her for a moment before Tadashi hung his head.

"I didn't expect her to take it this hard. Most girls usually hate me after we break up." He set his voice high. "'You're just like everyone says! You're just a sex-hungry playboy! Never speak to me again!'" A nervous chuckle. "I used to laugh. It was just a game, after all. But for some reason, all the yelling and cursing and damning started to get to me. I tried being a little nicer when I dumped them, but they still hated me. Sashi's the first person to actually still want me. I feel guilty. I hate seeing girls cry. They're the ones people look down on so much. Double standards…They're horrible. It's almost horrifying that people hardly ever targeted my group for going out with so many girls, when they would call girls who do the same thing 'sluts' as easily as they would say 'hello'."

Xue had listened silently, but suddenly realized that she was in danger of letting her guard down.

"Are you going somewhere with this, or are you just drying your mouth out?" She looked up at him, startled to find that he was gazing at her. "W-What?"

"Let me prove to you that I'm not like them. Let me prove that I genuinely just want to be around you. That I honestly care about you. If you still think I'm a jerk by the time I take you home, then I'll leave you alone. I know I've been saying this a lot, but just give me a chance."

She frowned.

"I know, I know…" He bowed his head. "I'm sorry. I'm really truly sorry that I said those mean things about your dad and his store. He didn't deserve that. He works harder than most people, and in a way I admire him for that. I was way out of line. I'm sorry."

She bit the inside of her lip. "Alright. I kept telling my mom I'd give you a chance, but Sashi really convinced me. I'll give you this one last chance. That's it."

A huge smile spread across his face and he hugged her. "Thank you so much! I won't disappoint you!" He pulled away from her. "You ready for some fun?"

She gave a small smile. "I sure am."

"Alright, then! Let's go!"

He grabbed her hand and led her into the crowd. Xue looked at where they were joined.

_They're…so warm…his hands…_

**

* * *

**

For the next few hours, the two explored what the festival has to offer. Somehow, all the activities became a competition (most of which Xue won).

"Alright, whoever gets the smallest goldfish buys the dangos for tonight," he said grinning at her.

"Sounds fair." She picked up a poi and waited. "You may go first."

He smirked. "I should warn you – I'm kind of made of awesome when it comes to goldfish scooping."

She smiled back. "Then you should show me how it's done."

He bent over the rectangular tub that held the goldfish. "Watch carefully." In one quick motion, he dug the poi into the water and back out again. "Ha-ha! See Now that's how you – What's so funny?"

Xue covered her mouth to stifle her laughter as she pointed at his poi.

"Huh?" He looked to discover a huge hole in the center. "Bwuh!"

She knelt down and shoved him out of the way, then readied herself, casting a shadow over the tub for the fish to flock to. "I hope you have your wallet handy." She scooped up a fish near the wall and grinned. "Ta-da!"

Her victory was short lived, as the fish fell through the damp paper and back into the tub. She sweatdropped as she turned to the volunteer running the booth, giving her sweetest smile.

"It still counts, right?"

The worker grinned back. "Not a chance. It didn't make it into the bowl."

Xue sighed. "I didn't think so." She turned to Tadashi. "Now what?"

He smiled. "It's alright, I was planning on treating you anyway. Come on." He took her hand and led her to the dango stall.

She took a moment to survey her options. "Hmm…I'll take that one, and that one…Oh! The smiling one! The one with the star, too! And that one…and I need this one…"

He watched her face light up as she was handed the two sticks of dangos. She stepped to the side so he could pay, then sat on a bench. He soon joined her.

"Having fun?"

"More than I thought I would."

"Well, that's a start." He looked her over. "You really are stunning tonight, you know that?"

She blushed and looked away. "Oh, knock it off. Come up with something new."

He smiled. "Sorry, I just tend to blurt out whatever I'm thinking."

"Then I suggest you learn inner monologue."

"Then how about this: Where do you see yourself in five years?"

She stopped. "I'll hopefully be graduating from Tokyo University. Then I'll get to work on developing and advancing the new seed splitting research that's been in the news lately."

"You like flowers?" he asked thoughtfully.

She shook her head. "When my dad was younger, he had a dream of creating fields and fields of butterbur so the koropokkuru wouldn't have to lose their home. It was really important to him. I doubt I could ever grasp the passion he had for this."

She leaned back and looked up at the sky. "But when I was born, he had to work and go to school so he could support my mom and me. It was because of me that he had to give up his dream. I feel like I need to take over for him. I want to make his dream come true. So I've applied to Tokyo University so I can get a degree in botany. Then I can devote my life to finding a way to produce fields and fields of butterbur in a very short time, and without a lot of work. That's all I want. My teachers say that if I keep my grades up, I can get in. So that's what I'll strive for." She sighed. "Quit staring at me."

"Sorry." He twiddled his thumbs as she straightened and took another bite of her dangos. "You really are kind. You try to hide it, but you always give yourself away. You really want other people to be happy." He touched her hand. "You have no idea how sexy that is."

Xue could feel her face burn as she practically shoved the stick of dangos down her throat.

He laughed. "You're so cute."

She glared at him.

"Just be careful. Don't want you to choke."

Defiantly, she began chewing on the dangos, despite how far inside her mouth the stick was.

He looked worried, but sighed. "Suit yourself."

She continued to munch on the dangos, humming in a bratty fashion.

There was a snap.

Tadashi quickly looked to see Xue with wide eyes. She dropped her stick with the remaining two dangos on it and he immediately noticed the splintered end. She desperately grabbed at her throat, her eyes shifting madly as she tried to figure out how to save herself. She tried to stand and rammed her stomach against the backrest of the bench.

Tadashi, who had been in a stupor, stood and grabbed her from the bench. He tried to press his fist against her stomach, but her obi made it hard to perform the maneuver effectively. Frustrated, he frantically ripped it off of her. He once again positioned himself.

"This had better fucking work."

With a few heaves, the dango, stick and all, flew out of her mouth. She coughed, then fell to her knees as she tried to catch her breath. Tadashi flopped back down onto the bench.

"I told you," he panted. "I may not get top marks like you do, but you should still listen to me every once in a while."

"I do," she retorted. "I just chose to wait a while longer." She pulled herself onto the bench and put her obi on her lap. Then she leaned forward and put her face in her hands.

"You okay?" he asked, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I hate that feeling…"

"I don't think anyone likes the feeling of choking."

"I hate feeling helpless."

He grimaced and sat back. "I know you do."

"For a second there, I thought it was the end. I thought I was going to die."

"You didn't trust me to save you?"

She looked up at him, like the thought honestly hadn't occurred to her. "No…I'm just used to not depending on people outside my family for help. I had to take care of myself, as well as Seta, when we were younger."

"Teasing?"

She nodded. "Thanks to my hair, people noticed right away that I was 'different'. I was able to take it until my first year of middle school, but then I had to start defending myself basically. Mom taught me how to do that, and occasionally some friends of the family helped as well, but I was taught to never break any bones, and I haven't. I only fight when I feel that it's necessary."

"So why have I gotten beat up so much?!"

"Because I didn't want you near me, so I decided to eject you from my field of vision. Not the same as fighting."

"Riiight." He straightened. "But you have friends now at least, right?"

"Yeah," she said, a smile gracing her lips. "It was accidental, since I met them because I was being teased. But they're friends, at least. We don't hang out a lot outside of school, but that's okay. I have other things to keep me busy."

"That's good."

For a few minutes afterward, neither of them spoke. The cheerful sounds of singing, gossiping, and prize-winning gave them something to fill what would have otherwise been a tense silence. Xue finally turned to him.

"Um, so…what about those three friends of yours? What's been going on with-"

"We're not friends anymore," he said loudly. She could see a masking smile on his face. "I broke the rules of the group, so I've been kicked out."

She stared at him with a gaping mouth. "Kicked out?" she said finally.

"Yup. I've been chasing you for too long, so I was ousted."

"But you have other friends, right?"

"Ehh…Kind of, but not like those guys. We don't hang out much."

Stunned, she stared at her dangos on the ground. _He lost his best friends because of me._

"Well, the other two might still be friends. I mean, they didn't stab me or go after you. I hate Zegen for that."

"I'm sorry…"

"Hm? What?"

She clutched her obi. "It's kind of my fault that they kicked you out. I mean, I did nothing wrong…I don't think so anyway…but I still feel guilty."

He glanced at the ground. "I'll manage, don't worry. We only have this year of school anyway, then we're done and I don't have to worry about who likes me and who doesn't."

As he looked at her again, he saw a droplet of water on her hand. Then another appeared. He tilted his head so he could see her face. The mascara she had put on earlier that night was now running down her cheeks. He quickly reached into his pocket and took out a handkerchief, but she jerked away from him before he could wipe her face.

"Hey now, come on, don't be like that. You can tell me what's wrong."

She looked at him, then frowned as her eyes filled up with tears again. "I just know what it feels like to not have any friends at school, no one you can truly trust or confide in. It's so lonely. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I really wouldn't."

"Xue…"

He gently turned her head and wiped her face. Then he pressed his forehead against hers.

"Thanks for worrying about me. It's really means a lot to me. But really, you don't need to cry about this. It was a choice I made, and I don't really regret it, to be honest." He gently put a hand on her wrist. "Because of my choice, I got to spend tonight with you." He smiled. "It's actually kind of a good thing you cried. You're even more beautiful without that makeup on you."

She looked away. "Thanks."

Some drums sounded, and they looked to the bonfire in the center of the festival.

"It's time for the Pair Pyre Dance," Tadashi said. "Let's go get your obi fixed and join in!"

He pulled her off the bench and they went to the first aid station where the nurse retied the obi.

"You ready to dance?" he asked.

"I told you, I don't know how!"

"Oh, right, right, riiight! Here, let's practice a couple times!"

He guided her through the steps patiently, holding her hands above her shoulders as he stood behind her. They turned and spun until Xue promptly crushed Tadashi's foot with her geta.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do that!"

"It's okay, I know it was an accident," he replied, tears of pain in his eyes.

"Can you still do the dance?"

"Of course! Don't want all this practice to be for nothing, right?"

"R-Right…"

Xue couldn't help but glance at all the other couples as she clumsily danced with him around the bonfire. They all looked happy. Excited. In love.

_Why am I doing this dance anyway? I'm not his girlfriend or any—_

But as he spun her, and she saw the way he was smiling at her, her mind blanked. It was like her heart had forgotten its duty, like she had forgotten to breathe. She quickly looked at the other pairs, but when the time came for him to spin her again, she found herself mesmerized. They locked eyes as she went around again and again. She forgot about everyone else, as he had the moment they started dancing.

_It's like I'm the only one here…I'm the only one he sees._

She gave one of the most honest smiles she had in months.

_This is…fun._

The next time they faced each other, she leaned in.

"Thank you for saving me back there."

He looked a little surprised, but smiled. "Of course. A knight always protects his princess." He kissed her hand.

Before she could react, they moved on to the next step, placing him behind her, their hands still connected. Despite herself, Xue glanced back at him.

He kissed her.

She looked forward again, so flustered that he needed to guide her through the next few steps.

Still, her smile remained.

Off by a tree, Seta looked at the photo of the happy couple on his cell phone, smiling before he closed it.

**

* * *

**

As the drums died and the lanterns dimmed, Tadashi, as the lead, stopped their dance, and they started walking back to the Usui home. Neither of them spoke, but each had a faint smile on their face. He walked her to the door, and they finally looked at each other.

"I had fun tonight," she said softly, trying to hide her face.

He smiled at her. "I'm glad." He shifted his weight when nothing more was said. "So, I guess I'll see you tomorrow, Princess. Have some sweet dreams for me, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay."

He started to turn, but then held up the small silk bag. "Almost forgot to give this to you. Here."

She took it. "Thanks."

"See you tomorrow." He started walking.

"Yeah, bye…"

She noticed that something was in the bag, so she stretched the top of the drawstring entrance to open it. Inside was a wooden tag with inked words on it.

**Will you be my girlfriend?**

Her heart stopped. Before she realized it, she had run down the balcony and was standing at the top of the stars. At the sound of her clip-clopping, Tadashi looked back at her.

"Tadashi…" Her hands were gripping the tag.

"Yes?"

She took a deep breath, her face hotter than she ever remembered it being.

"M-My answer…is yes!"


	84. Xue's Icy Heart

I don't really think I have much to say. This was a hard chapter to write. I'll admit it, I'm rather fond of Tadashi. I don't know why exactly, but I am. And I didn't like putting him or Xue through all this. But at least this is the last full flashback chapter, so let's take some solace in that.

Ah, yes. Go buy Shaman King Kang Zeng Bang volume 27 for the all new Shaman King ending. It's kickass.

**

* * *

**

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Four: Xue's Icy Heart**

**

* * *

**

"Yeah, so, this is what I got him."

Xue held up a subscription card to Goddess Sweets.

"Is that a joke?" Chuuko asked, pointing at it.

"Kind of," she replied with a grin. "I need one more thing, I think."

Another girl raised her hand. "Condoms!"

"No."

"Aww, Xue, you're no fun. You guys've been together for over six months! That's a long time to wait."

She tossed her head. "We're not ready yet."

"She means she's worried her boobs are too small."

"NO I'M NOT!!"

Her friends laughed and she sat down in embarrassment. Xue and Tadashi were still happy together, much to the astonishment of their classmates. He often surprised her with a special dessert at lunchtime or a random flower, or just small displays of affection. She would often play them off as being annoying, but everyone could tell that she really did enjoy the little surprises.

It would be Christmas in a few days, and Xue was still frantically searching for a heartfelt gift for him. He had just smiled and said he would love anything she got him when she asked what he wanted. She was on her own.

"I'll just have to think of something," she said glumly.

Sashi, who was sitting quietly at the end of the table, raised her head. "Get him something that reminds him of when you two met, or when you started going out. He'd like a memento of that sort."

Xue looked at her, guilty that she'd forgotten she was there. "Thanks. I'll try that."

**

* * *

**

As she walked home, her mind raced with possible ideas.

_A basketball? No… Skateboard? No… A book about knives? ARGH! NO! GODDAMMIT I can't think of anything!_

A bird squawked, and she looked up to see a pet store. Looking through the windows, she could see fish tanks along the back wall. She had an epiphany.

"A goldfish! Since we both failed the goldfish scooping game at the bonfire festival! Perfect!"

She resolved to buy one a day or two before Christmas, then started to practically skip her way home. When she saw her house, she smiled and ran towards it.

A few months before, her parents made a down payment on a house using the revenue from HoroHoro's store. Now they had a small, three bedroom home, a luxury they greatly appreciated. Xue and Seta had been forced to share a room in the apartment, something that had become a great inconvenience years ago. Xue would, more often than not, retreat to the couch and sleep there, not wanting to make her brother feel like he had to be careful or embarrassed of himself. Now, they didn't need to waste time getting dressed in the bathroom, and they each, for once, had privacy.

When she got in and went to take off her shoes, she noticed all the extra pairs already lined up at the door. She smiled.

"Are my favorite twins in the house?" she called.

A squeal came from the living room, followed by running until Lien appeared and charged at her. "Xuuuuueeeeeeee!" she cried as she leaped and hugged her.

Xue had to brace herself to prevent being knocked over. She playfully tugged on her friend's navy blue loops as she surveyed her.

"You got taller, didn't you?" she teased.

The twelve year-old beamed. "Yup!"

Xue smiled, then squinted at her hair. "Are those new ribbons?"

Lien patted them and smiled once more. "Seta just gave them to me. Aren't they pretty?"

"They sure are!" She looked past the heiress to see the boy in question blushing, a small victorious smile on his face.

"You didn't even thank him," the other twin said, coming to stand beside his friend. "Mother and Father taught us better than that."

"Sorry…" She ran back and hugged Seta tightly. "Thank you so much, Seta! I love them!"

The boy went stiff. "Y-You're welcome, Lien," he squeaked. Before he could hug her back, she let go and turned back to Xue.

"Why'd you come home so much later than Seta?"

"I was doing club activities."

"Oh, you still do that ballet thing?"

Xue shook her head. "I decided to go back to gymnastics. Makes me feel stronger." She grinned. "Plus, flipping around is fun. I think you'd like it."

Lien frowned. "I can't."

"Why not?"

She made a sound of embarrassment and looked down at her chest. Xue sneered.

"Oh, I see! Someone's becoming a woman!" She went behind her and grabbed her maturing breasts. "You're only twelve, but you're already this curvy! Have you been drinking a lot of milk or something?"

Lien was squirming, her face red as she tried to get away. "S-Stop it! It's not funny!" she cried. "I didn't ask for them! And I'm almost thirteen, anyway! L-Lots of girls have boobs at thirteen!"

Ren sighed before walking over to them, calmly removing Xue's hands, and pulling his twin away from her. "Lien doesn't respond well to that sort of teasing, however friendly the intent. Our classmates are already expressing their jealousy in a less than subtle manner."

"Oh…Sorry, Lien," Xue said softly.

The girl smiled, the blush still on her face. "I-It's okay, you didn't know."

"DID I HEAR A XUE?!" Pin-Mei's voice rang from down the hall.

Ren grinned. "Looks like you should go make an entrance."

Xue reciprocated. "Looks like it." She started for the living room. As she passed Seta, she put a hand on his shoulder and leaned in. "Don't worry, I'm sure that someday, you'll get to do what I just did," she whispered.

His face has already been pink, but it immediately flashed crimson as he pushed her away. "N-N-Neesan! Don't say things like that!"

She just cackled and skipped down the hall, captured by Pin-Mei as soon as she entered the room. Seta stared after her, a worried look on his face.

"That was very out of character for her," Ren observed.

Seta sighed. "She's been a lot more relaxed since she got a boyfriend over the summer. I'm happy for her, but he's a little bit of a perv sometimes, only a little bit, though. I think it's rubbed off on her. She's okay most of the time, but every once in a while, she'll do something unpredictable like that." He smiled. "But she's still the same sister I love, so it's okay."

"I see," the scion said, his attention once again on the hallway.

He looked out of the corner of his eye at his sister, who had taken to poking one of the objects of Xue's envy. She poked it from different angles until she winced, then looked up at him with innocent eyes.

"What is it?"

"It…It feels funny when you poke the center."

There was a near choking sound as Seta hurriedly covered his nose. After the things his sister had said and done, this had been the last thing he needed to hear. The twins blinked at him.

"I-I'm going to the bathroom," he said sheepishly before running away.

Lien blinked, once again turning to her brother. "Niisama, what happened to Seta?"

Ren glanced at her, his pursed lips tilted in thought. She was looking at him patiently, awaiting the wise answer that always followed this expression. He finally placed his hand on her head and patted her a couple times.

"You did," he said bluntly.

She looked confused. "What?"

He gave her a hug of pity. "I'll tell you when you're older."

"B-But that's not fair! I wanna know now!"

"Ah, well…We can't have everything we want."

They went to join the rest of their family in the den.

"Oooh! A boyfriend! How exciting!" Pin-Mei cried as she clapped her hands. Niu-Nai poked his head over his mother's leg to see the picture Xue was displaying.

"Another Niichan!" he exclaimed.

Xue smiled as she closed he cell phone. "Yeah…It's nice to have someone experienced. I still haven't gotten the whole gist of it yet."

"Don't be foolish," the elder Ren said gruffly. "People don't love in exactly the same way. There's no 'right way' to love someone."

The girl nervously scratched the back of her head. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Ren tossed his head. "Of course I am."

"Is he going to be coming over for Christmas?" HoroHoro asked.

"Oh, yeah! That's what I wanted to talk to you guys about. Is it okay if I go over his house that night? His dad said he's probably going to be working late, and I…don't want him to be alone." She kicked at the floor lightly.

Rong tapped her foot. "Xue, you knew that we were going to be having Ren and Pin-Mei over. There really isn't any excuse for you to skip out when they had to come such a long way to spend the holidays with us."

"Oh, it's perfectly fine!" Pin-Mei cried, flailing. "It's their first Christmas together, right? So it's okay! I-I mean, they probably want to have some privacy and such…"

Rong and HoroHoro immediately snapped their heads over to study their daughter. They glanced at each other, then back at her. Rong put her hand on her shoulder.

"How about you and I sit down and talk?" she said, her voice firm.

Xue blinked at her, then glanced around in confusion. Pin-Mei was now covering her mouth, aware that she had said too much. Ren had closed his eyes and was rubbing his temple as he sighed at his wife's inability to hold her tongue. She could hear Lien murmuring to her brother, asking what made everyone so quiet, and him just shushing her until a later time. Xue shifted her gaze back to her parents. Finally, it dawned on her, and her eyes widened as she brushed the hand away and took a step back. She tried to hide her face.

"W-What?! No! That's definitely NOT what I meant! Tadashi and I aren't really worrying about that right now!" She tried to stand up straight, taking a confident stance. "A-And even if we were, that's none of your business!"

Rong looked back at her husband, sharing a knowing glance. She turned back to Xue.

"You're right. If you and Tadashi want to do that, we can't stop you. Just promise us you'll be safe about it. You can't depend on Tadashi reacting the same way your dad did in the case of you getting pregnant. I don't think you want your dreams of going to Tokyo University to be jeopardized either."

Xue stared at the ground. She knew her mother hadn't meant to, but she felt patronized. She still had a little guilt within her about be conceived when her parents were barely in a relationship, and were neither emotionally or financially ready for a child.

HoroHoro noticed the look in her eyes and went over and hugged her. "But don't you believe for one second that we didn't want you. We did, and that's why you're here."

"You should have seen how protective of you they were when Rong's parents…er…told them that they didn't agree with their decision," Pin-Mei offered, trying to make up for the drama her comment had caused. "They were ready to fight tooth and nail for you, Xue! They've always loved you very much!" She turned to Ren as if to encourage him to say something uplifting, but he just nodded, a small smile on his face.

Xue looked at them, then gave a faint smile. She didn't even have to say anything to get the reassurance she so desperately wanted. It was obvious that her parents had considered her feelings throughout the years, how she must have felt when she finally learned the story of her birth, and that without her, the possibility of her parents being together like this was very slim. They probably wouldn't have met until Ren and Pin-Mei had gone to visit the Ainu. These get-togethers, in essence, were because of Rong and Pin-Mei's deep relationship. What reason would they have to venture all the way to Hokkaido if only HoroHoro was there? Perhaps they would have eventually traveled there, but it would be nowhere near as often as now – which was about every two months, less if one of the children was celebrating a birthday. Either way, the adults knew that Xue was the link between them that had connected Rong and HoroHoro and brought them back together. That had encouraged the two fathers to maintain their friendship, and allowed the mothers to keep theirs.

"Alright," she said finally. "I promise that if or when things get to that point, I'll be smart about it."

Her parents both sighed heavily, evidence that a huge weight had been lifted off their shoulders.

"Thank the gods that I'm blessed with an intelligent daughter," Rong thought aloud.

"That makes two of us," HoroHoro agreed.

Pin-Mei heard a near inaudible whimper and looked up to see Lien standing at the door uncomfortably. She had been having trouble at school as of late, and her confidence in her intelligence and ability to live up to her brother's example, as well as her father's past academic success, had dropped. She smiled, getting ready to chime in and sing her praises.

"Three."

Pin-Mei looked up, her eyes shifting to her husband. She glanced at Lien, who had also looked up in astonishment. The heiress's eyes eventually softened, smiling at the approval she was given.

"Four..." Pin-Mei was still looking at her husband listlessly, as if she had fallen in love all over again.

Xue looked about the room at her parents, the Taos, and then behind her where Seta had taken his place beside Lien, gazing at her with an expression of passionate, unconfessed love in his eyes.

_I want to be able to love as deeply and sincerely as these people._

**

* * *

**

Once she had the goldfish bag in her hands, she looked at it doubtfully.

"This is a mistake," she said to herself. But all the same, she bought the Beginner's Goldfish Kit and began walking to the Meihou residence. The confidence she had in her gift dropped with every step up to the front door.

_At least I'm making up for it_, she thought as she looked down at herself. For the first time since they had started dating, she was wearing a skirt, something Tadashi clearly wanted but didn't vocalize often. In her mind, if her present was a failure, at least she was giving him another treat. _This isn't degrading, right? I mean, it's just Tadashi and it's just this one time.  
_

She knocked on the door, stepped back, and waited. Running could be heard until the door opened and a smiling Tadashi emerged.

"I'm glad you could make it," he said. "It's a little lonely to be in this house by myself."

She smiled back rather sadly. "Well, I'll be here for a while. It sucks that your dad has to work tonight."

He gestured for her to come in and then began leading her toward the living room so they could sit down. Aware that she failed to even wrap her present, Xue panicked and looked for a safe place to hide it. Out of desperation, she quickly put her gift on the table, covering it with her coat, and then spun around to smile innocently at him, hoping that her actions were inconspicuous. He saw what she was doing, but paid her no mind. She was trying hard, that much he could tell, and he would never allow himself to trivialize her efforts. Instead, he carried on the conversation, ignoring the large lump that had suddenly appeared as he plopped himself down on the sofa.

"Yeah, but people usually act up on Christmas Eve, and he's the chief, so he needs to be there." He smiled and patted the spot to his right, and she obediently sat down next to him. As soon as she hit the cushion, he grabbed her and hugged her tightly. "But you're here with me, so it's fine. There's no one else I'd rather spend Christmas with."

She returned the hug, smiling softly. It felt good to be wanted, and she never got tired of it.

There was a ding noise, and Tadashi got up to check on the dinner he had prepared for them. With his back turned, Xue stared down at her shoes in embarrassment.

_I forgot to bring something for dessert! Dammit, I'm so stupid!_

"Looks like it's about ready!" he exclaimed as he put on some oven mitts. He took the roast out and set it on the table, then busied himself with checking the various pots that were on the stove.

Xue rushed over to the cabinet in a desperate attempt to redeem herself and took down two glasses. She turned to the refrigerator. "What do you want to drink?"

"Milk is fine."

So she poured two glasses of milk as he began loading their plates with food. After they had sat down and begun eating, she couldn't help but notice that he kept stealing glances at her. She had been lenient on letting him get away with this, but now she honestly wondered what he was staring at.

"Your neck," he said simply.

She raised her eyebrows. "My neck?"

He nodded before coolly taking a bite of the chicken.

"And that's because…?"

"Just imagining how nice it would look with something around it."

Xue stared at him, her hand involuntarily touching the place of interest. _No…He didn't…There's no way he could've…_

But as dinner was finished and cleared, and they returned to the couch, he produced a small, slim box. She stared at it, letting it sit in her hands idly. Tadashi smiled expectantly, curious as to why she hadn't opened it yet.

"Is something wrong?"

She bit her lip. _Yeah! You spent too much on me – again!_ "No…I-I just like the bow. I don't want to mess it up."

"Oh…But the thing that's inside is so much better!"

She locked eyes with him. He looked so hopeful, so confident that his present would amaze her, and she couldn't ignore the guilt and utter embarrassment that was developing inside of her. Her family may have moved into a house, a luxury that very few enjoyed, but she, herself, was still poor. All she had was the meager yet deeply appreciated allowance she received each week. She didn't have the time for a job, though her school had become slightly more lenient on allowing its students to have one. Tadashi had since returned to his job at the bakery and now was earning an enviable 1000yen per hour on top of the allowance his father gave him, which was more than twice as generous. He emphasized saving money, but always seemed to have a wallet full of bills anyway, arming him with the means to shower her with gifts big and small while he received little from her (not that he minded).

She knew her gifts weren't good enough, but he always accepted them without the slightest hesitation. It just made her feel worse every time he took whatever knickknack she had bought him and placed it on a spare shelf in his room. He'd always step back and admire it in the same way one would admire the beauty of the Hope Diamond. It was one of the things about him that she doubted she would ever understand.

_Opening Tadashi's presents is like removing a Band-Aid_, Xue thought to herself._ All I have to do is close my eyes and yank the box open, then it'll be over. We'll marvel at it for a few minutes, then we'll move on. I can feel guilty about this later. The only thing I can do now is show how much I appreciate his gifts._

She inhaled and squeezed her eyes shut, tugged the ribbon to unravel the bow, and quickly snatched the cover. The inside of the box almost seemed to glow as she lifted the lid. She sheepishly opened her eyes to see a necklace with a medium-sized topaz hanging at its center. It took her a few moments of staring before she was able to say anything.

"It's beautiful…" she whispered.

He smiled, obviously pleased with himself. "I'm glad you like it, Princess. I know that jewelry isn't usually your thing, but I decided it was worth a shot."

"Of course I love it!" she cried, waving her arms. "I mean, I need to have something nice to wear for dinners at my friends' house and stuff!" _What the fuck am I saying? I never dress up nicely when we go to China._ "Or, you know, just around the house!" _That's even worse!_

She stopped when she realized that he was leaning his cheek on his fist. He was clearly amused by her blundering. Red-faced, she looked down at the gold chain as it shined back at her. Deep down, she knew she had no use for it, but she loved it anyway. She smiled.

"Thank you! Thank you so much!"

"You're welcome."

He removed the necklace from the box and unclasped it, holding it out to her. She nervously leaned toward him so he could put it on her. As she sat up again, he tilted his head and admired the jewels.

"I don't know what's more beautiful – you or the stone."

She tired to shy away from him. "You say weird things sometimes, you know that?"

He continued beaming. "You're right, it's no contest." He leaned in and gently made her look at him. "You're more beautiful than anything I or anyone else could possibly compare you to."

Xue whimpered and shoved him away, then ran over to the table to stand in front of her present. "Mine's not all that great but…I picked it out myself, so I hope you like it."

He stood in front of her, a genuine look of excitement on his face. "Awesome! I can't wait!"

Slightly reassured, she took a deep breath. "'Kay! Here it is!" She grabbed her coat and stepped to the side to reveal to goldfish kit. She watched as he approached and inspected the gift.

"This is great, but why would I need any of th—Oh wait." He gently moved the box to see the bagged goldfish. "Aha! So there _is_ a fish!" He picked up the clear bag with his new pet in it and poked at it. "Hey there, little fishie! How are _you_ doing on this fine Christmas Eve night?" After a small, amused chuckle, he put the bag back on the table and looked at his girlfriend. "Trying to remind me about how much I suck at catching goldfish?"

Xue's face lit up. He had seen through the cheap gift and understood why she had bought it in the first place. "Hey, I can't let you forget such a glorious defeat. I'd suggest you use her to practice, but she might not be able to stand being dropped so much."

"Ha-ha. Very funny, hilarious even," Tadashi said with a playful scowl. He picked up the guidebook and leafed through it. "I hope this tells me every single thing about being a good goldfish daddy. I want to take good care of my new fish-baby."

She smiled at him, touched by his dedication. "Well, we can figure it out together."

Tadashi looked at her, and the sudden serious look he was giving her sent a chill up her spine. He put a hand on the small of her back and pushed her closer to him.

"I love my present, thank you," he whispered.

She hated how she still wasn't used to this. "You're welcome..."

With a light kiss, he guided her back to the living room. When they were seated again, he pulled her by the ankle so her right leg crossed her body and laid in his lap. His hand crept up her thigh and he pulled her closer so he could kiss her neck.

"Bet you thought I didn't notice, ne?"

She could only let out a slight whimper.

"Silly. I noticed the second I saw you. But other things take priority over that. Can't have you thinking that I care more about your body than I care about you spending tonight with me. The skirt is just a sweet little extra."

He began kissing her with more vigor while he rubbed her legs again. She put her arms around his neck to make sure she didn't fall backwards, but Tadashi soon forced her onto her back, leaving a surprised Xue to stare up at him.

To be truthful, she hated times like this. But it was undeniable that she loved them as well. He always made her feel weak. Her mind would almost always go blank, leaving her vulnerable to the tender touches of her boyfriend. That wasn't who she was. She took pride in being strong and largely independent, but for some reason, whenever he got her in his grasp, all of that was out of reach.

Despite that...

"You really do have a wonderful body, Xue," Tadashi whispered in her ear. "You shouldn't compare yourself to other girls. Ignore their chests, especially, since I know you often size yourself up with your classmates. You're the perfect size for me. Plus, you don't have to deal with the backaches." He smiled and kissed her again.

She reveled in the endless stream of compliments he showered her with. Never a negative thought, only the occasional constructive criticism. Even then, it was only to tell her that she shouldn't be so hard on herself.

She shivered, then her body stiffened. His hand was on her stomach, and steadily moving upward. They had briefly entered this stage before, but she still hadn't gotten used to it yet.

"Even after all these months, I still can't get over how soft you are," he murmured. He made eye contact before capturing her lips again.

She relaxed her tense body and rested her head against the sofa cushion. It felt nice – the trust that is. Growing up, she had always been looking over her shoulder, expecting a friend to greet her with a stab to the back. Even now, she felt the need to put a wall between her group of friends and herself, wondering if they were really as loyal as they pretended to be. With Tadashi, she never felt the need to examine and pick apart his every action.

Just as his hand grazed her bra, the doorbell rang. The two teens jerked to attention, quickly sitting up innocently as if they were being walked in on.

Tadashi straightened the gray blazer he was wearing as he looked toward the door. "Wonder who that could be. Dad's not supposed to be back until early in the morning."

Xue watched him hesitantly get up and open the door. A police officer stood on the doorstep, and she saw the way his body instantly tensed.

"Officer Kyouin," he said slowly.

Xue quickly gasped. Kyouin Kechi was the officer who was stationed at the police box down in the square. His main jobs were to catch petty shoplifters and give directions, but if he was at the Meihou's front door, that could only mean...

Tadashi seemed to be trying to play it off. "What's up? Did my dad want dinner or something? Or is he going to be out later than he thought?"

Kechi's eyes wavered momentarily, but he tried to push the pity away for now. "Tadashi, there was an accident."

He choked slightly. "Accident...?"

"We asked the chief to help us get a gang broken up since it was causing trouble downtown. There ended up being some exchange of fire, and the chief got hit in the chest. We tried to save him, but he died on the way to the hospital."

Tadashi covered his mouth. He crippled slightly as his grip on the door frame tightened.

"On behalf of the entire force, we would like to express our deepest condolences. If you'd like, we could assist you with the funeral arrangements. Your father also has a life insurance policy, as well as a trust fund to finance your education. We will also try to get his other accounts released to you to provide further assistance."

He uncovered his mouth for a brief moment. "Th...Thanks..."

The officer saluted him. "Your father was a good man, and you should be proud of the accomplishments he made throughout his career. Please let us know if you require further assistance."

"I...I will...Thanks..."

Kyouin finished his salute and left. Tadashi closed the door and leaned his back against it. Xue quickly went over to him as he slumped to the floor. For a few minutes, all she could do was stare at him. His eyes were focused on the ground, but she knew that all he could see was his father's face.

_What are you doing, you idiot? Say something to him!_

But before she could, his body shook, and his head fell into his hands. Seconds later, he was sobbing, but still trying to 'take it like a man'. She watched him, almost sorry that she was there. She worried that her presence was hindering his ability to express his anguish like she knew he needed to. Slowly, she touched one of his wrists and pushed it down so she could see his face. He looked up at her.

"I cried in front of you a couple times. It's okay for you to do the same with me," she said softly. Without giving him a chance to decline, she wrapped her arms around him. "Go on, Tadashi, I'm listening."

There were a few beats of silence while he seemed to be deciding if he should give in and break down in front of her. His arms soon wrapped around her and his hands fisted the back of her shirt as he shamelessly cried into her shoulder.

"It's not fair...It could have been anyone else...why did it have to be him?!"

"I know it's not fair," she whispered. "He just was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Now I have no one! Mom abandoned me, and now Dad's gone, too! What the hell am I supposed to do now?!!" he yelled.

"Maybe you could try to find your mom? She probably misses you, and would be happy to take you in..."

"No! I'm not looking for her! She left us like the selfish bitch Dad said she was!"

Xue stroked his hair as his cries picked up again. She didn't really know what else she could do.

"I love you," she whispered, squeezing him tighter.

"I...love you too," he replied after a few chokes.

"I'll be here for you, I promise."

"Thank you..."

But the silence that followed reminded her that she was inexperienced compared to him. She didn't know how to comfort him. The realization of just how powerless she was made her want to sob along with him, but she held it in. She couldn't trivialize his grief by crying over something that was so small in comparison.

_But what can I do? I want to make things better but..._

"Hey, let's go to the couch or your room or something. You'll be more comfortable," she said finally.

He nodded solemnly, then clumsily stood up and allowed her to lead him to his room. They sat on the bed, and she rubbed his back in a stiff manner.

_Okay, now what?_ She bit her lip. "I'm sorry I can't do more for you."

He shook his head. "Don't be sorry. You really can't do much in a situation like this."

Xue looked at the floor. _Come on, think! _

She squeezed her eyes shut, then slowly opened them. After propping herself up slightly, she gently turned his head and kissed him. It was clear that he was surprised, but after a few trembles he returned it and wrapped his arms around her.

She could feel how warm he was as she was pressed against him. When he pushed her down onto the mattress she froze momentarily, wondering if he was ready for this yet, but when he leaned down to kiss her again, she instantly relaxed.

_If this can make him feel any better, even just a little bit, then it's okay. I'll just let him for now._

His actions were tame at first, but as time went on, the intensity built and the rubbing and squeezing became rougher. Soon he was fiddling with the buttons of her blouse. He glanced up at her, and she slowly nodded. He smiled and moments later threw the shirt on the floor. Other articles soon joined it. He leaned over her, his eyes never leaving hers. She finally looked away slightly, but he grabbed her chin and brought it back.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you, too."

They both smiled.

He stroked her legs, going up to her stomach, then tracing a finger downward. She shivered, and their eyes met.

"Do you want to?"

It took some time for her to fully process the words. She tried to laugh it off. "T-Tonight? Wouldn't you rather wait until you're happier and –,"

He wasn't laughing. "No, Xue. I'm serious."

"S-Still…"

"If I need to feed you a cheesy line, I will. I just want an answer either way."

Inside, she knew they both wanted the same thing, but she didn't want it to be under these circumstances. A little voice in the back of her head echoed what her parents had told her mere days before, but it wasn't loud enough for her to listen. All she could hear was the steady rhythm of breathing they each had. He covered her right hand with his left.

"I've waited a long time for this, Xue. I've had so many opportunities before, and I've turned them all down. I don't want to wait anymore. But only if this is what you want, too."

After a long silence, she nodded. "It is." She smiled, as if a weight had been lifted off her chest. "I love you, and this is what I want."

"You're sure?"

"Yes.

"Say...um...can we turn the lights o--"

"No, they're staying on. I want to see every look on your face."

She clutched his hand tighter.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

**

* * *

**

_Happy Days! Happy Days! A night of stars---_

Xue's eyes shot open. She sat up quickly to look for her cellphone, which she found in the pocket of her discarded skirt. After looking at the caller ID, she timidly opened it.

"Hello...?"

"Xue!" Rong's voice yelled from the other end. "Where are you?! Do you know what time it is?!"

She looked at the clock. It was almost three in the morning. "I...I'm sorry, Mom...I just..."

"Are you still at Tadashi's house? Didn't you say you'd be home by midnight at the latest? We've been worried about you!"

"I am..." she started, but trailed off. She didn't know what else to say.

"What else? Why aren't you home?"

She heard shifting and looked back to see Tadashi sitting up groggily. After some hesitation, she turned back to the phone.

"Mom, I'm sorry, but Tadashi needed me here. He...His dad was killed last night while he was on duty." When there was complete silence on the other end, she felt as though she had to continue. "I just couldn't leave him by himself. I'm sorry, I should have called, but I hope you can understand why I'm still here."

Rong was still in shock. "Oh...That's...terrible! Oh my...gods...It's alright, Xue. I completely understand. I wish you had called, but it's alright. Wh-Why don't you have him come over today? Then he can spend Christmas with us, and Pin-Mei can meet him like she's apparently dying to." She let out a nervous laugh.

Her daughter gave a slanted smile. "I'll ask him if he wants to, but I don't know if he'll be up for it."

"Oh...well...that's fine. Just let him know that we'll be here if he needs us."

"I will, thanks Mom. I'll talk to you later on today. Bye."

She sighed as she closed the phone, almost shaking. While the discussion with her parents was still far from her mind, she still knew that they wouldn't exactly be jumping for joy if they knew what she and Tadashi had been doing only hours before.

Tadashi was smiling at her as she stood to return to the large king size bed.

"Hey," he said in an airy voice.

She swallowed. "Hey..."

He shook his head, chuckling and glancing down at the sheet that covered him.

"What?"

He glanced up at her. "I just wish you could see how beautiful you look right now."

Xue looked down at her nude body, almost as if she were trying to figure out what exactly was so beautiful about her. He beckoned her, and she returned to laying next to him. With his arms wrapped around her, pulling her close, she could tell what he wanted.

"You've been really good to me tonight, Xue."

She made a small noise of acknowledgment.

"You really have. It's weird, but I...It's easier to deal with all this when you're here with me."

"I'm glad."

He rubbed her shoulder before brushing a couple pieces of hair out of her face. He gave her a smile, and she reciprocated.

"And the only thing I can do now is show you just how much I appreciate you."

"Tadashi..."

With a kiss, he silenced her, only to reverse the effect moments later.

**

* * *

**

"_Someone_ looks happy today," Chuuko mused as she watched Xue change into her indoor shoes.

Xue looked up, her face turning red. "What makes you say that?"

"You're grinning ear-to-ear! I can't remember the last time I saw you this happy!" Her eyes widened. "Oh my gosh. D-Did you?!"

When Xue looked away from her, the girl squealed, attracting the attention of their friends around them. Chuuko bounced over to her friend and hugged her. The other girls crowded them, chattering incessantly.

"Oh my gawd!"

"Did you…really?"

"Finally! Six months is a long time to wait!"

"Who made the first move?"

"I'm so proud of you!"

Xue stared at them, unsure of what to do.

"Guys…This is kinda private…"

"Oh, come on, Xue! Can't you at least tell us what it felt like?" Chuuko whined.

Xue bit her lip. "Well…" The girls all leaned in to listen to her. "It…It felt really warm…and nice…He told me later that it was the best he's ever felt in his life."

"Awww!" the girls cooed.

There was a loud slam of a locker. The group looked over to see Sashi stiffly walking down the hall. She looked over her shoulder and glared at them before going into her classroom.

"Jeez, what a bitch," one of the girls said.

"Yeah. You know, she still hasn't gotten over Tadashi. Some guy asked her out, and she said she was waiting for someone else."

"Catty much?"

"Seriously."

Chuuko put her hand on Xue's shoulder. "Well, I guess you'll just have to keep an eye on your man to make sure that she doesn't try anything funny!"

Xue was still staring down the hall, unsure of what to think. Sashi was her friend. Or at least, she thought she was. Why would everyone make it seem like she wanted their relationship to fail?

"Yeah…"

**

* * *

**

It was only a few days later that Xue found herself alone in the bathroom with Sashi. They hadn't spoken since that day, so she tried to wash her hands quickly and leave. But before she could make it to the door, Sashi spoke.

"So, I hear from your noisy friends that you're not a virgin anymore," she said as she casually applied some light blush.

Xue slowly turned. "Yeah…That's right."

"So Tadashi finally gave it up, hm? I wonder what's so special about you."

She wanted to run. It was too uncomfortable to be talking about this. Especially with Sashi.

"Good for you, though. Now you're a real woman." There was a snap as the compact closed. She turned to her. "Of course, you're a smart girl, so you took all the possible precautions I take it?"

"P-Precautions?"

"You know, silly – **condoms**."

For the first time in nearly a week, Xue remembered her parents' warning to her. She hadn't taken it to heart because she honestly didn't think that she would need to worry about it so soon.

As the horror showed on her face and she stared at the ground, Sashi gave a faint smile before donning a mask of concern.

"Oh my, Xue! Are you seriously going to tell me that you and Tadashi didn't use protection? Don't you know what could happen?"

Xue subconsciously put her hand on her stomach. "I could…get…" She stopped as her eyes welled up with tears and she covered her mouth.

"Don't tell me you thought you were immune to pregnancy just because it was your first time," Sashi taunted. "I mean, your mom had you when she was around your age, right? Sad to say, but sperm don't care how young you are." She took a couple steps toward her. "I mean, Xue, you could be pregnant _right now_. The school won't like that one bit. You'll probably get thrown out. No diploma, no Tokyo U."

Xue looked up at her slowly. "W-What should I do?"

Her "friend" put a hand on her shoulder. "I think it would be best for you two to take a break right now. Then you can have time to think about what you want to do with your new bundle of joy." She smirked. "Good luck." She sauntered out of the room.

Xue continued to stare at the floor.

_How could I be so stupid?! I can't have a baby! I need to get to Tokyo University for I can make Dad's dream come true! He had to give it up because Mom got pregnant with me. I can't let the same thing happen again!_

But the thought of separating from Tadashi made her sick.

_He-He'll understand, won't he? He doesn't want a baby at our age! It'll just be for a little while. It'll be fine…_

But she wasn't fine for the rest of the day, nor the nearly week that followed. Xue couldn't bring herself to abandon Tadashi so soon after his father's death. But after nearly throwing up in the sink, she hurriedly pulled him aside after school. His face made her want to take it all back, but she was so scared that she didn't what else to do.

"Why…? I don't understand…" he whispered. "I noticed that you've been tense lately, and that you didn't want to do it again, and that's perfectly fine. I just want you to feel comfortable. But why are you saying that we need to take a break?"

She couldn't even bring herself to look at him. "Tadashi, I love you, I really do, but I need some time to think."

"About what?"

She forced herself to make eye contact. "Tadashi, we didn't use protection that night. And it's not like we only did it once. I…I could be pregnant _right now_. I just need to think a little bit. Once I know if I'm really pregnant or not, then I can decide what I'm going to do."

He clenched his fists. "Why are you shutting me out? If there really is a baby, then we should be going through this together! It took BOTH of us to make it!"

She looked down again. "I'm sorry. This is the way it has to be for now."

He stared at her, speechless. Xue clutched her school bag tightly and turned and walked away. He could feel the burning in his eyes and the tears blurred her from sight.

"You promised you'd be there for me! What happened to that?!" he yelled after her.

She froze, then ran as fast as she could. He turned to the wall and punched it as hard as he possible could. There was a crunching sound, but he could hardly feel the pain.

Something inside him was broken much worse.

**

* * *

**

A week passed. The couple that was usually attached at the hip was now broken up. Xue wouldn't talk to him. Tadashi would leave flowers in her locker to try to rouse the romantic feelings that he knew still existed. While they made her smile for a few moments, she soon remembered why she felt she had to stay away from him. They were both miserable.

Seta silently watched his sister be the coldest he had ever seen her. He knew that there had to be more to the story. The next chance he got, he confronted his senpai.

"What's going on? Why are you and Neesan acting like this?"

Tadashi glanced up at him, then looked at the ground again. "Xue wanted a break, so we're taking a break, I guess."

"But why?!"

He looked at him again. He sighed. "If I tell you, will you PROMISE not to tell ANYONE?"

Seta nodded slowly. "I promise."

His senpai heaved a sigh. "Xue thinks she's pregnant, and doesn't want me around for some reason."

Seta stared at him with wide eyes. "Preg—That means—Did you—Actually---Neesan's not---SEX?!?!"

"Yeah, but I guess it was a mistake. I hate to say it, but I regret that night. If I had known that this would happen, then I never would have even taken her shirt off." He lowered his head. "You have no idea how much I miss her. I really need her now, you know?"

"Yeah." Seta frowned. "How could Neesan keep all this from us? And how could she leave you when she knows that you're going through a rough enough time as it is?" He grit his teeth. "I'm going to talk to her. I know I shouldn't get involved, but I can't let Neesan do this to herself and to you. I'll get her to come around."

Tadashi smiled at him. "I don't really care what it takes. I just want my Xue back."

Seta gave him a thumbs up. "I'll do my best! Later!" He ran to catch up with his sister.

Tadashi smiled weakly, only allowing a tiny ray of hope to shine through. He didn't want to get his hopes up.

"How much longer are you going to wait?"

He turned to see Sashi coming up to him. "What's it to you?"

"Because I'm here, Tadashi, and I still love you." She smiled and spread her arms. "I'd never leave you like Xue has. I know you need someone to be with you during this difficult time. I want to be that someone, Tadashi."

He sighed and turned away as if he'd heard this before. "Sashi, how many times do I need to tell you this? I don't love you. It was a fling, alright? You were just the victim of a playboy; the subject of a story to tell to the boys. Go find someone else to devote yourself to." He started walking away. "Xue will come back. I know she will. I'm waiting for the day when she does." He raised a hand. "Sayonara."

Sashi scowled, then grinned. "She's cheating on you, you know."

Tadashi stopped dead in his tracks. He turned around slowly. "What?"

"She's cheating on you with some family friend of hers. I told her this wasn't fair to you, but she wouldn't listen. She even said that she's just going to abort the baby if she really is pregnant and not even tell you. She said that she would never want your baby, that she'd rather have that other guy's baby instead."

He stared at the ground, horrified. Would Xue really say all of that? Was any of it even true?

She strolled over to him. "I know this must come as a shock to you, but I thought you deserved to know. You're so good to her, and she doesn't even appreciate you as much as I did."

"She's never mentioned any family friend…" he said quietly.

"Oh, really? He was her first crush. They've known each other since they were little kids. She confessed to him, but he flat out rejected her. I wouldn't be surprised if she still had feelings for him." She pulled out a photo. "This is him."

Tadashi looked at it hesitantly, then snatched it from her and examined it. Xue was standing next to a young man with dirty blonde hair. They were smiling and doing victory signs in front of an onsen while dunking Seta underwater. His eyes narrowed. Xue had never mentioned this guy. Why? Was she really sneaking around behind his back?

"From what I hear, he's coming to visit this week. I guess you can see for yourself." She took the photo back. "I'll still be here when you need me."

Sashi smirked as she left the bewildered boy to digest her lies.

**

* * *

**

The next time he saw Seta, all the boy could do was sadly shake his head. Xue wouldn't be moved. His new group of friends had tried to distract him by hanging out together, but soon gave up when he rarely showed.

At night, he would sit alone in his empty house and gaze at the goldfish Xue had given him. He felt numb all over. Why was this taking so long? He was almost at a breaking point. He couldn't take much more loneliness.

He finally cracked in the first week of February as he left school. Tadashi watched Xue walk toward the gate, once again feeling sorry for himself. There was a small shriek and he looked up to see her being pulled behind the gate wall. Without another thought, he began sprinting toward the gate to come to her rescue.

But when he came to the other side, she was fine. In fact, she looked quite happy – as she hugged the boy from Sashi's photo.

Tadashi's blood boiled. This was the bastard who had stolen the person he loved most away from him. It was because of this random guy that he was suffering all by himself.

"YOU BASTARD!!"

He ran and tackled Hana, then started punching him with all the strength he had. Hana let out distorted words of surprise, hardly able to believe what was happening to him.

"You fucking bastard!" Tadashi yelled. "Stealing my girlfriend away from me! Who the hell do you think you are?!"

"Tadashi! What's gotten into you?! Leave him alone!"

Xue pulled him off her friend and then rushed over to help Hana up. The youth checked his nose and mouth. When he saw the blood, he frowned.

"Xue," he said. "Who is this guy and why do I want to give him a rabies shot?"

She could tell that Hana was trying to be as calm, civil, and laid back as he ever was, but she couldn't blame him for his irritation.

"This is Tadashi. He's my…" She slowly looked at the ground, almost in shame. "…boyfriend…"

Something inside Tadashi smiled. At least she was still acknowledging their relationship somewhat.

"I can tell from your accent that you're from Osaka, but here in Hokkaido, as well as my hometown, you can't just go around beating people up for no reason," Hana said.

Tadashi glowered. "Yes I can. You're ruining our relationship! She won't even talk to me anymore! Hell, she's never even mentioned you! She's been sneaking around with you behind my back!"

Xue's mouth dropped. "What are you talking about?! I'd _never_ do something like that! I'd never cheat on you, Tadashi!"

"Then what the hell is he doing here?!"

"HE'S MY FRIEND!!!" she screamed.

He seemed taken aback. "F-Friend?"

"Yeah, he's just a friend! I wouldn't lie to you! O-Our parents are friends, so we are too!"

"Then why the hell are you talking to Sashi about wanting his baby and not mine?!"

The students around them stopped and stared, then started gossiping amongst themselves. She could hear the accusations of her being a slut and the condemnations of their failure to use a condom. The anger built inside of her, and she herself felt the urge to launch an attack on the boy in front of her.

Instead, she walked up to him, then slapped him across the face. With a punch to the stomach, he fell to the ground. She stood over him ominously.

"Never talk to me again, Tadashi. Not until I tell you I'm ready to get back together. Until then, don't call me, don't text me, don't email me. I don't even want you looking at me. Just leave me the fuck alone."

With that, she turned and went back to Hana. She put an arm around him and guided him to her house.

Tadashi remained on the ground, crippled by both pain and devastation. It was worse now than ever. He just wanted her back. He didn't think it was wrong to still love her as much as he did. She was his first, after all, so of course he would feel attached to her. But she seemed close to hating him. She had already moved on to some hippy. He had nothing.

"Xue…"

**

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**

After that day, Tadashi stopped going to school. When the administrator called his house, no one answered. The bakery called to let him know that he was fired due to multiple missed shifts, but only reached the answering machine. No one heard anything from him.

Xue would pace about her room, her cellphone on her bed. Every so often, she would pause and stare at it, as if considering making a call, but never did. Every time she reached out for it, she remembered Hana's bloody face, and the anger would resurface.

Seta went to Tadashi's house many times but was never let in. He could see Tadashi peek out the window from behind a curtain, so he took minimal comfort in knowing he was alive.

On Valentine's Day, Meihou Tadashi broke his silence.

**

* * *

**

Xue hesitantly held up the white plastic stick, holding her breath.

_Not Pregnant_

She exhaled, and tossed the test in a plastic grocery bag that lined her bottom desk drawer. It made a small klinking sound as it joined the others. She sat at her desk, her head in her hands. Every single one of them had given the same answer. She must have tried at least a dozen by now, but they didn't provide her with any comfort or reassurance.

Otsuka Ai began singing from her bed, and she looked over at her cellphone.

**Tadashi x3**

She was both overjoyed and angry. He was alive, but he had the nerve to call her after attacking Hana. Despite that, she grabbed the phone and opened it.

"Hello."

"Hey Princess…Happy Valentine's Day."

She had to keep from gasping. His voice sounded so dead and weak. If his name hadn't displayed, she would've barely known who it was.

"Yeah…" she said finally in a nervous voice. "Happy Valentine's Day to you too, Tadashi."

He laughed weakly. "You don't sound too happy to hear from me."

"It's not that…It's just…"

"Are you pregnant?"

"W-What?"

He seemed to know exactly what he wanted to talk about.

"I…" She turned to the opened drawer. "I'm not sure yet…"

"You would've known by now. You probably aren't."

"But still--!"

"Even if you are, you can just move into my house with me. We can raise the baby there, just the two of us. I have enough money in the banks and everything. I got a hold of all of Dad's accounts."

"Tadashi…I don't want a baby right now."

"But you do in the future, right?"

"R-Right…"

"You want it to be mine, right?"

Her heart stopped. How was she supposed to answer something like this?

"Tadashi, I'm not ready to talk about that stuff yet."

"I see…So you don't…"

"Tadashi! That's not--!"

"I know you hate me, but would you be willing to meet with me so I can at least give you a gift?"

She looked at the ground. He sounded so desperate. _All of this was a mistake. I shouldn't have done this to him. He needed me and I ran away. He's right, we should have been in this together. I should let him do this, then we can talk about things and hopefully work it all out._

"Okay, that's fine."

"Meet me at the large intersection in the square. Don't bring Seta or that hippie or anyone else with you." He paused. "And would it be too much for me to ask you to dress up a little for me?"

"I…I guess I could do that."

"Alright. I'll see you in an hour."

He hung up before she could say anything. Xue stared at the phone. The things he said about coming alone, his tone of voice…It was all too weird. Something wasn't right. But she had already agreed, so she had no choice but to put on some nice clothes and meet with him.

HoroHoro caught a glimpse of her as she left.

"Where are you going, Snowflake?"

"The square," she replied quickly as she shut the door.

He stared after her, mildly concerned. After a few awkward glances at the door again, he went back to folding laundry.

Xue ran the entire way. She wanted to make it there before she had the chance to change her mind. She had already disappointed him enough, and she couldn't do it again. Not today.

Just like he said, he was waiting for her in the middle of the intersection of the square. He stood amongst the people as their eyes met. People passed between them like he wasn't there, but his eyes never wavered. She swallowed, then walked toward him. He smiled weakly at her.

"You look as beautiful as ever, Princess."

She bit her lip and nodded. "Thank you."

He took out a gift that was wrapped upwards and closed by a neatly tied bow at the top. He handed it to her. "I hope you like it."

Xue looked at him hesitantly, and he nodded to coax her. She pulled on the ribbon to untie the bow and found a teddy bear inside. It had on it what seemed to be Ainu clothing, and held a large butterbur leaf over its head. She smiled.

"Koropokkuru," she said in a cutesy voice.

He smiled at her wistfully. "I remember you said you wanted that. Like it?"

She nodded. "I do. I really do, Tadashi. Thank y—."

There was a click. She looked up slowly.

Tadashi had pulled a small handgun from the back of his pants and was now pointing it at her. Her mind blanked and she tried to keep herself from trembling. There was no evil grin on his face, no vengeful eyes, only tears. She wanted to say something, to ask him why he was doing this, if what she had done was worth killing her over. Had this really been why he called her here? But her mouth was dry.

"Are you scared?" he whispered.

She nodded.

"So am I. I was so scared I'd lose you someday. And then I did. Over something as petty and selfish as sex," he said. "If you weren't ready, you should have said so. I wouldn't have forced you. _I love you_. We should have been in this together.

"But no, you left me. The time when I needed you the most, and _you left me_. I gave you all the love I had to give. I thought we could be happy for many years to come, even if there _was_ a baby."

He glanced at the gift. "They say that if you give someone a bear and they name it after you, that you'll be together forever." He paused. "What are you going to name the bear, Xue?"

Xue just stared at him, terrified tears streaming down her face. "Please don't do this, Tadashi. I…"

"Tell me you love me!" he cried suddenly.

She clutched the bear. "L-Love you?! At a time like this?! You're about to shoot--!" But she silenced as he readied the trigger.

"This is the end, Usui Xue."

She looked around. The crowds had dispersed, not wanting to be caught in the crossfire. She could hear sirens in the distance, but they wouldn't make it in time.

_Someone help me…I'm not ready to die…Daddy's dream…I haven't achieved it yet!_

He smiled at her kindly. "I love you, Xue. Very, very much. Even if you hate me, I still love you. Even after all the things you've done to me, I still love you. That's why…"

She squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face in the bear's fur.

"…I could never hurt you."

Her eyes shot open. She looked up to see him press the barrel against his temple.

"Now neither of us will be in pain."

"Tadashi…Stop it…Tadashi…"

"Happy Valentine's Day, Xue."

She reached out for him, the bang drowning out her scream.


	85. Memories Are the Very Best Medicine

Oh Hey! Less than a month! Shazam! I'm just hoping I can keep this up over the summer. School ends in a week and a half, and then it's Anime Boston time again! I'll be going as Ren again with a new and improved battle outfit and wig, and even a Houraiken! Fun times for all!

So yeah, happy summer everyone! I hope you all survive your final exams!

**SPOILER ALERT!!:**** This chapter refers, albeit indirectly, to a HUGE spoiler in chapter 288 of the Kang Zeng Bang edition of the Shaman King manga. If you have NOT read this chapter and do NOT want to risk being spoiled, I suggest you find a translation of it in your language and read it! Don't say I didn't warn you!**

**Notes: "Pi-Pon!" is a Japanese onomatopoeia for a correct answer bell and, or just a general sort of "Correct!" expression. **

**Guan Li and Ji Li are coming of age ceremonies in China for men and women respectively. They are usually held when a person reaches the age of twenty.**

**One Ainu tradition involves the men making a knife with an intricate and beautiful design carved into the handle, along with a looped piece of cloth hanging from it. He then gives it to woman he has feelings for. If she reciprocates, she will hang the knife from her wrist.**

**

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**

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Five: Memories Are the Very Best Medicine**

**

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**

"And there you have it," Tadashi said with a smirk.

Xue was trembling on her knees in front of him. He removed his hand to reveal wide, horrified eyes. Tears were streaming down her face as her lip quivered. Small whimpering sounds came, but nothing intelligible.

He brought his face close to hers. "So, do you remember it all now? Remember how you drove me to suicide? How you cheated on me and abandoned me?" He got even closer. "You murdered me, Xue. If you had just told me you loved me that day, then I'd still be here. But you were too caught up on that hippie friend of yours."

Xue clutched her head in anguish. "Xu…Xue's s-sorry…Xue's really sorry! Xue never meant to kill Tadashi! Xue's a good girl – Daddy said so! Xue---…"

Tadashi grabbed her hair and yanked it hard enough to drag her closer to him. She let out a cry, which he ignored. "You'd better start acting your age, Xue. If you speak in third person one more time…" He held up his right index finger. Like a lighter, a flame sprang from it. Xue let out a scared whimper.

"Understand?"

She nodded.

"Good." He practically threw her to the ground. She had to catch herself with her hands, her arm warmers getting a bath in the mud. "Acting innocent after what you've done really doesn't suit you, Xue. I mean…were you ever actually pregnant?"

Xue grabbed at the mud. "Xu - I mean – I…I can't be a mommy now! Not back then, either! Mommy said I'm too young to have a baby! We were too young to be a mommy and daddy!"

He glared at her. "Answer my question. Were you ever really pregnant? Or was it just a lie to get away from me so you could go after that scrubby friend of yours?"

She shrunk. "I never had a baby…"

"So it was a lie…I see." He chuckled. "You and Lien – beautiful girls who lie and lie and lie until they get what they want."

"It wasn't a lie!"

"Then where's the baby, Xue? Hmmm?! If you don't have one, it means you lied!"

She clutched her head again. "I…I…"

"Don't you see it yet? You pretend to be all cute and sweet and adorable and lovable, but in reality, you're a selfish, cold-blooded killer. You'll have to live with that for the rest of your life. Try to sleep at night now, Xue!"

The girl trembled even more, practically curling up. Then she let out a blood-curdling scream. Tadashi snickered as she shook her head, sobbing and trying to tell herself that nothing was wrong, that she wasn't to blame for his death. He finally walked over and yanked her up by her collar.

"You're part of the reason why I'm here, Xue. I knew you'd come. And I knew I would get to make you suffer for what you did."

He heated his hand and slapped her. She howled in pain and tried to grab at her face.

"That's just a small taste of the torture you'll be experiencing." With a grin, he tossed her across the clearing. "I'll get back to you later. I have a few things to take care of first."

She skidded as she landed on her stomach. It took a few moments before she was able to move. She realized how cold her hand felt, and looked down to see her left arm warmer had loosened, and was nearly off her hand. Her brown eyes focused on her wrist, then widened before she quickly checked the other one. Seemingly bewildered, she stared straight ahead, more tears falling from her eyes as more memories returned. Suddenly, her eyes narrowed and her fists clenched. She grit her teeth and stiffly stood up.

Tadashi had already turned around and was walking back to Lien. Ren, still bound to the ground, glared at him. After a quick glance, the fiend noticed him and squatted to his level.

"My, my, if looks could kill," he sneered at the scion. "Are you hoping I'll just drop dead because you're staring at me?"

Ren couldn't do anything except maintain his venomous leer. Tadashi grinned and mussed up the boy's violet hair. He stood and returned to Lien, who thrust her arms around him as he approached. Her eyes were still blank as she gave a dazed smile.

"Tadashi-kun…"

"Aww, I love you too," he said as he returned the hug. Then he let go of her and guided her back to her prayer circle. "Would you continue your prayer for me, Lien? Pretty please? It'd make me really happy!"

His doll smiled and nodded, making a sound of agreement. She walked to the center of the circle and knelt down.

Ren once again struggled against his chains, trying to ignore the burning skin. "Lien! Stop it! You don't know what you're doing! If you bring Hao back, he'll--!"

"Oh will you SHUT UP?! I've made sure that she won't be released from the spell until I say so. Save your breath." He squinted and saw the small pile of mud Ren had made some time before. Something was reflecting back at him. He was about to go investigate when he heard a cry.

He turned around just in time to see Xue lunge at him, tackling him and sending them both to the ground. He looked up at her in surprise for half a second before she began beating him with all the strength she could muster. The tears streamed down her face with every blow she gave. When she saw blood trickle out of his nose, she stopped. She sat up and they stared at each other, sweat dripping from her forehead.

"You…have no idea…what you did…to me," she panted.

He looked surprised at the sudden maturity in her voice, but eventually smirked. "Trying to validate your actions by making yourself look like the victim? As I just reminded you, you're the murderer here."

Gritting her teeth, she grabbed his neck and pressed her thumbs into it. When he began gagging and tried to pry her hands off of him, she saw his shaded face and let go. Then she gave him another right hook.

"You selfish bastard!" she screamed. "Did you honestly think that shooting yourself in the head would make it so neither of us was in pain?! My pain _started_ then!! YOU didn't have to worry at all. _I_ had to stare at your dead body until they took it away! _I_ had to deal with the guilt! _I_ had to deal with not being able to guide your spirit to the afterlife!"

She lowered her head, suddenly shameful of her tears.

"_I_ was the one who was in the hospital for two months! _I _was the one who blamed this on the people I love most! _I _was the one who took it out on them and made them suffer along with me!

"I WAS THE ONE WHO LOST SOMEONE I LOVED!! I WAS THE ONE WHO BECAME A CHILD AGAIN JUST TO GET AWAY FROM IT ALL!!!"

She snapped her head up. "You didn't have to deal with _any_ of that! You FORCED me to suffer alone! You made sure of it! When I tried to follow you and use that gun to kill myself in front of all those people, I found out that you purposely put only one bullet in it. You wanted me to suffer all alone like you did!"

Tadashi scoffed at her. "Your suffering is nothing compared to mine. You had your family to support you. I had no one."

"Maybe so, but your suffering could have been reversed when we got back together. Mine couldn't. You were never coming back…"

He laughed. "Serves you right. You deserve it all after what you did to me." He grinned. "This is all your fault, too. You did this. That's why Lien is over there. That's why Ren is on the ground. And that's why you're going to die tonight."

Xue had lowered her head again, her fists clenched.

He went on. "How does it feel to see all the damage you've done and all the pain you've caused in physical form after all this time, hm?"

She ripped off her arm warmers and shoved her wrists in his face.

"I'd like to ask you the same question – how does it feel?"

She pulled them back slightly so he could focus on them. A large, dark scar ran down each of her wrists. The skin looked pinched, signifying that stitches had been used to close the self-inflicted wounds.

His hard eyes wavered momentarily, then turned malicious again. "That's because you're weak. Only weak people hurt themselves like th--"

Xue punched him again, but once wasn't enough. She went berserk on him. She lost count of how many times her fists met his cheeks. Her mind was blank, other than the desperate need to make him understand just what she had gone through.

Finally, she stopped. Her body quivered as she looked down at how his bloody face was. But the blood soon disappeared. Any damage she had done was reversed. He just stared up at her, bewildered. She was crying in earnest now.

"I…" she whispered. "With both our separation and your death…I dealt with them in the worst ways…

"_But I dealt with them the best way I knew how_."

**

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**March 17, 2021**

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**

"Hey, Snowflake," HoroHoro said quietly as he sat in a chair next to a hospital bed. "The nurses say you won't eat unless they force you to, and that's really not okay. You need to eat when they tell you to or else you'll get even more sick."

Xue was staring down at her hospital bed, her eyes blank and soulless, like she had given up. She barely blinked, and some time passed before she said anything. Her answer came in a quiet, monotone voice.

"Nothing here tastes good."

Her father sighed and looked at the ground to his right. After thinking, he looked at her again. "Is there anything I could bring in that you'd eat? How about some dangos or riceballs? Udon, maybe? You always liked that. I could get you some Calpico to drink, too. That sound good?"

She shook her head slowly.

Defeated, he put his right hand over hers, his fingers brushing against the bandages on her wrists. He closed his eyes as he remembered how he and Rong had found their daughter on her bedroom floor, her wrists slashed and bleeding profusely. It had been another incident that stemmed from Tadashi's suicide; another way for her to try to cope with her loss. Another way to try to come to terms with the guilt that had since consumed her entire being.

Since the day that she had seemingly wanted to be her last, Xue had been in the hospital's mental clinic. Therapists were persistent in trying to get to the bottom of the couple's break up and if she knew why Tadashi had taken his late father's spare pistol and ended his life that fateful day. But she hardly spoke. Rarely voluntary, usually only if someone asked her a question or said something that needed an answer.

HoroHoro, who had since hired a few part time workers to help him with his store, insisted on spending the time he wasn't working at her bedside. Rong spent her days there, and Seta would visit her after school. But HoroHoro wouldn't allow himself to leave her completely alone. He would gently urge her to share what happened, wanting to know every detail, but also aware that pushing her would yield nothing.

"Xue," he said quietly. "I want to know what happened. I want to be able to help you through this." He looked at her expectantly, but she said nothing. His head drooped again.

"-y…fault…"

He looked at her. She was still staring down at her wrists, but her eyes had welled up with tears. He squeezed her hand. "What is it, Xue? What do you want to say?"

"It's all my fault…" she whispered. "I killed him…Tadashi's dead because of me…If I hadn't left him alone…he'd still be here…He…He loved me…and I…"

Her father stared at her. Tadashi was dead because of her? That wasn't possible, was it? She wasn't truly capable of killing, was she?

"Don't be silly," he said in a nervous voice, trying to laugh it off. "The police and the people who witnessed it all said he shot himself, Xue. It was a suicide. There's no way you could have had any part in that. It's all just in your mi--,"

"It's because I ran away from him…" she whispered. "If I hadn't abandoned him…then he'd still be here…He suffered by himself…If I had just stayed…"

HoroHoro stared at her with horrified eyes. He glanced at the potted butterbur Seta had brought her that sat on the nightstand. The words she just spoke were not foreign to him. They echoed in his mind, her voice slowly changing to his with each repetition. His mind raced. Xue's sobs were the only thing to bring him back.

"He…Tadashi…He was the first person who loved me…I…I KILLED HIM! He's dead…and it's because of me…" She grabbed at her face in anguish as she crippled forward. "Dad…I'm a murderer…Your daughter's a murderer…I don't…He should still be alive! If I had just stayed with him, he--!"

He lunged hugged her, capturing her in a tight embrace that was near impossible to escape from. His own eyes were filled with tears as he silently sympathized with her and the despair she was feeling.

"It's not your fault," he said, trying to keep his voice steady. "I know what you're feeling. You were just doing what you thought was right at the time. There's no way you could have known what would happen. Don't blame yourself."

"But…But I…"

"Stop beating yourself up," he said quietly. "You've been through enough already."

"I've tried…I really have…but I can't…I'm the one who left him, Dad! I can't see it as not being my fault! I started the whole thing!"

"No. No, Xue. Believe me when I say I know how you feel. I'm telling you that it's not your--,"

"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!!" she screamed as she pushed him away.

HoroHoro stared at her as she panted with crazed eyes.

"You couldn't possibly understand how I feel…" she murmured. "You've always had Mom, so you've never lost someone you loved! Don't you dare try to say you know what I'm feeling!" She glared at him, noticing that his eyes were still mildly red and teary. "I don't want to talk anymore. Just get out. Leave me alone."

His gaze drifted to the ground, his hands gripping his knees. _Should I tell her? But Rong doesn't even know…It is worth it if it might make her more comfortable talking to me?_

"Get. Out." his daughter said curtly.

He squeezed his eyes shut. This wasn't Xue. Not at all. She would never talk to him like this. He finally gazed up at her. "I'll be back tomorrow."

Her eyes had faded again, and he wondered if she had heard him. Sadly, he brushed her bangs back and kissed her forehead, then squeezed her hand before leaving.

**

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**April 9, 2021**

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**

"She's not getting any better, Horokeu," Rong said as she sat in the armchair of Xue's hospital room.

HoroHoro glanced at Xue's sullen face. "I know."

"Has she told you anything?"

"Nothing. She used to cry about how Tadashi's death was her fault, but she doesn't even do that anymore." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I…I think we're losing her."

Rong bit her lip and covered her face with her hand. "Why is this happening to us?" She let out a growl of frustration and used both hands to mess up her hair. "How can we get her to respond again?! She barely eats at all. If she keeps it up, she'll die! How can we get her to snap out of it?!"

Her husband just looked out the window. "I don't know." He drummed his fingers on the glass a few times, then turned to her. "Rong, I need to talk to you about something."

She just kept staring at the ground. "What is it?"

He inhaled. "When I was a kid, I--"

His ringtone interrupted him. Exasperated, he took it out and checked the caller ID. Once he saw the name, he calmed down and answered it.

"Hey. You're there?...N-No! Of course I didn't forget!...Whatever. I'll come pick you up. Bye."

He hung up and looked at his wife, who was by now giving him a quizzical look.

"Who was that?" she asked.

"One more chance. He's here, and I need to go pick him up from the airport." He hugged the distraught redhead before taking out his keys and heading out the door.

He returned nearly two hours later, Hana in tow.

"Thanks for coming," the Ainu said as they walked down the hall toward Xue's room.

"It's no problem," Hana replied with a smile. "My parents have disappeared on one of their cross-country treks again, so there wasn't much to do anyway." The smile faded. "Besides…what you said made me worry about her."

HoroHoro looked back at him with a smile. "Well, hopefully seeing you will wake her up a bit." He gripped the doorknob, then stopped. "Right now, she's not the Xue you and know. Her emotions are unstable, but I'm still hoping that you can help her."

The youth nodded. "I'll do my best." He walked into the room and closed the door.

As he studied her, his heart sank. This wasn't his best friend. This wasn't Xue. Her eyes were never so blank and apathetic, and her face and lips were never so pale. The Xue he knew was lively, spunky, vibrant – to just sit around for over a month was something she could never do. He swallowed, as if to accept what he was seeing, then sat in the chair.

"Hey," he said after a few moments.

Her eyes twitched, but she didn't speak.

"Your dad called me a few days ago. He said you've been sick for a while, and he thought maybe you'd feel better if I came to see you."

She didn't say anything. He sighed.

"I'm sorry your boyfriend died. I can tell it's been hard for you. But I'm sure his spirit's resting in peace now."

Her eyes widened slightly.

He put his hand on hers and squeezed it. "But I'm here now, so if you need to talk about it at all, you can, okay?" He smiled weakly. "You're my best friend, Xue, and I promise I'll always be here for you."

There was silence. Hana looked around, waiting for a response. When none came, he sighed.

"Well, when you want to talk, just give a holler, okay?" He hesitantly patted her hand before motioning to get up.

"I think I understand now…"

Shocked, he turned back to her. "What? What do you understand?"

She raised her head, her eyes revealing that her mind was unsound. "I get it…I'm not the reason Tadashi's dead…"

He looked confused. "Of course you aren't. It was hi--,"

"It's _your_ fault!" she cried pointing at him.

Her friend stared at her, horror now added to his confusion. "Wh-What? ME?! What did _I_ do?!"

Xue laughed. "S-See! If you had just gone out with me when I confessed to you, then I wouldn't have gone out with Tadashi, and we wouldn't have had sex, and he'd still be alive!! SEE?! All this could have been avoided if you hadn't rejected me!!"

Hana was speechless. He hung his head and stared at the floor. Why did she feel the need to tell him just how far she had gone with her boyfriend? It was nothing he was pleased to hear about. Then his mind shifted to the subject at hand. _Is she right? If we had gone out, would this kid still be alive?_

"Y-Yeah! And-And if you hadn't come over that day, he wouldn't have beaten the shit out of you, then I wouldn't have gotten pissed at him and punched him, and he wouldn't have stopped going to school, and he wouldn't have killed himself!!"

She stared at her hands, still giggling darkly. "I-I'm innocent! I didn't do anything wrong!" She clenched her hands. "I'm free! He can't haunt me anymore! I'm free! I'm free!" She laughed, tears streaming down her face until her mind finally broke down.

He sat there, dumbfounded. She had cracked. She was on the brink of psychosis, if she wasn't there already. He felt bad for her, but at the same time, he was desperate to prove to her that her boyfriend's death was in no way his fault, let alone hers. He grabbed her shoulders to still her and made her face him.

"Xue," he said firmly. "I know you blame yourself for Tada-whatever killing himself, and that you want to blame me, too, but you're wrong. It's not my fault. It's not yours either. We didn't do anything wrong." He looked at her with pitied eyes, hoping that she would see how foolish she was being.

But instead, rage slowly filled her eyes. When it looked as though she was about to explode, she shoved him away, almost tipping his chair over. After he regained his bearings, he looked up to see that she was giving him an almost homicidal glare.

"How dare you," she said in a dark voice. "How dare you deny what you did…He'd still be alive if it wasn't for you!"

Hana put his hand up to try to pacify her. "Now just calm do--,"

"Calm down? CALM DOWN?! I can't believe you! You think that just because you're a few years older than me that you can tell me what to do!"

"No! That's not it at all!"

"Yes it is! You just like being in charge – so you can bring me down! _That's_ why you rejected me!"

"Xue, why do you keep bringing this up?"

"Because if you had just told me you liked me too, then I would have never gone out with him!"

"Those are two completely different things!"

"NO! It's always the same! You're just out to hurt me like everyone else! That's why you came here!"

"No! I came because I care about you!"

"YOU'RE LYING!! I have enough shit to deal with! I don't need you here! I HATE YOU!! GET OUT!! JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

He froze, a devastated look in his eyes. He allowed the sinking feeling to swim around for a few moments before tossing his head to snap himself out of the trance and face her again.

"Xue, wait, I--!"

"Get out! GetoutGetoutGetout GET OUT!" she screamed, whirling a plate at him as she finished.

He quickly jerked to the side to avoid the glass discus, cringing as it shattered against the wall. By this time, he was terrified, but he still reached out to her.

"Xue! Wait a second! Just let me say something!

"No! I just want you to get out!"

He ignored her. "Xue, about before…"

"Just leave!"

"…I've changed my mind…"

"I'll call the nurse! I'll call security!"

"I…I don't feel the same way I did back then…"

She seethed as she reached for the potted butterbur.

"Xue,"

"I HATE YOU!! JUST GET THE FUCKING HELL OUT OF HERE!!!"

"I l--,"

Everything went black.

When her parents finally rushed in, they found Hana on the ground, his forehead split open. Blood and shattered pieces of the clay pot surrounded him. Xue was curled up, shivering and murmuring to herself. Rong and HoroHoro looked at each other in disbelief. Hana couldn't have thrown the pot at himself, so that could only mean…

"How could she do this? And to _Hana_ of all people?!" Rong cried.

Horo helped the youth to his feet, then glanced at his daughter. "It really shows how far gone she is." He turned to the victim, whom he was supporting by throwing an arm around his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Hana. I asked you to come over here, and you got pottery thrown at you."

"It's fine," Hana breathed. "I came because I wanted to. It's just an uphill battle, that's all." He smiled. "I know she'll come around eventually."

* * *

**May 2, 2021**

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* * *

**

Xue didn't get better. Hana's visit had roused her temporarily, but she eventually became unresponsive once again. She had been in the hospital for over two months, and with her lack of progress, the medical director finally issued an ultimatum:

"If she doesn't show any signs of improvement by the eighth, she will need to be transferred to the institution nearby. There is obviously nothing we can do for her here."

Her parents hugged each other, trying to find solace in each other's company as Seta looked on. Though they could pray all they wanted in hopes of a miracle, they knew full well that a transfer seemed inevitable. Their daughter would be isolated even more. The director assured them that the psychologists there would be able to help her – but not without a price. The institute was in another price range from the hospital, and they would receive very little aid through insurance. They worried that an extended stay would put them in the same financial situation that they were in barely a year before. However, they knew that if Xue was to ever return to her happy, spunky self again, she would have to go. What else could be done?

On the sixth of May, after most of the week had run past them, HoroHoro sat with his daughter, staring at his laptop. Squeals and sounds of laughter came from its small speakers, and his mouth would turn up periodically. Xue seemed as empty as ever. She would sit silently with glazed eyes, not looking at him or saying a word.

He watched it for a few more minutes, then smiled and shook his head. "You were so happy back then," he wistfully. When he noticed her eyes had shifted toward him, he put the laptop on her bed tray.

Home videos of her five year-old self reflected off her eyes. The little girl ran around in the snow, squealing as her father chased her.

"_Xue has Daddy's stick! Xue has Daddy's stick! Xue's all magicky now! Whee! Make it snow!"_

"_Xue, you need to give that back now! I'll help you make your own when I have time!"_

"_But Xue's being a shaman like Daddy! Xue needs this stick!"_

"_It's not a stick! It's an ikupasuy!"_

"_Winnipesaukee!"_

"_No! Ikupa—Oof!"_

_She ran to her father, who had fallen in the snow. "Daddy gots a booboo?"_

"_Yes. Big, cold, booboo," he replied, his face in the snow. He held up his hand. "Ikupasuy."_

_The girl happily put it in his hand. "Inu ga suki!"_

_He sighed and looked up. "Rong, you could help me a little, you know! She's not an easy girl to catch!"_

_There was a taunting giggle from the photographer. "Sorry, Aokun, but I can't be moving around like that with a baby on board."_

_Xue bounced over to look up at her, the camera following her as she went. "When's the baby gonna get borned?"_

"_He'll be born in April. Can you count how many months away that is?"_

_The girl's face twisted in thought. "1, 2, 9, 27, 53, 1 bazillion – 4!"_

"_Unconventional, but you're right! Good job!"_

_She jumped up and down in celebration, then continued smiling as she swung from side to side. "Mommy, when are you gonna teach Xue to be a superhero like you were for Auntie Pin-Mei?"_

"_When you're a little older, Xue. We're going to be busy with the baby for a while."_

_The child sulked for half a second, then bounced over to her father. "Baby! Baby! Baaaabeeee!" She hopped and then plopped down in front of him. "Xue wants to be a shaman like Daddy, too! Be a teacher, Daddy!"_

"_Going after ALL the super powers huh, Snowflake?"_

"_Yeah-huh! Xue's gonna be Super Special Ice Cutie Xue and defend the forest! Kiro's gonna help!" She jumped up and turned to the koropokkuru. "Arentcha?" When her friend chirped in reply, she squealed and began running around the clearing. "Invincible! Xue's invincible like Daddy!!"_

HoroHoro bit his lip as he stared at the screen. His daughter had been very eager to learn about her Ainu heritage, as well as their shamanic practices. He had been excited to teach her, proud when she took to them so well. Thinking of those lessons, those brief sessions of bonding time, made him smile.

But then he remembered how those traditions almost caused her to freeze to death. A snowstorm had torn through the town shortly after Tadashi's funeral. Xue had stood outside in the treacherous blizzard, dressed in her Ainu robes and clutching her ikupasuy. Since his death, Tadashi's spirit hadn't been seen. Xue hoped that if she waited long enough, he would appear, then she could apologize before leading him to the afterlife so he could rest in peace. But he never did. For days she stood outside, chanting a prayer to attract her late lover.

Her parents finally found her collapsed in the snow; her lips blue, her skin white and ice cold.

Once she realized that her efforts were futile, her depression worsened. Her grades plummeted, and she finally stopped going to school altogether. It was only a few days later that she tried to take her own life.

There seemed to be no end in sight. Xue had shut down, and it looked as though she wasn't coming back.

His daze ended when he noticed Xue's hand reaching up and stroking a key to move on to the next movie.

Her fifth birthday party. Her first day of school. Her proud moments as a big sister to a newborn Seta. Her first successful over soul. These and more of the family's happier memories displayed on the screen, causing the father to quickly and discreetly wipe a tear away.

"I wish we could have those days back, then things would be fun again." He lowered his head. "You were so carefree back then. Nothing could bring you down, not even when the kids at school teased you. You'd just smile and say that they'd be your friends eventually." He sighed. "I wish you could be like that again." He sniffed and wiped his eyes again.

Xue's eyes shifted to look at him, then back at the screen. Her younger self ran around, then gently pushed her infant brother closer to an equally small Lien, the older twin seated next to her. After watching the two study each other, she looked back at the camera with a double thumbs up.

"_Pi-pon! Xue approves!"_

Something snapped into place; closing one door, and reopening another.

* * *

The next morning, Seta hesitantly opened the door to his sister's room. His father had returned late the night before, so he had snuck in and turned his alarm to a few hours later in order to give him some much needed rest. In HoroHoro's place, he brought some breakfast to his sister, not that he was expecting her to eat at all.

"Good morning, Neesan. I brought you some fo--"

He cut himself off as he stared at Xue. She was sitting up in bed, a bright, sunny smile on her face.

"Morning!" she cried raising a hand. "Yay! Seta came to visit!"

Dumbfounded, he walked over to her, a bag from the local bakery in his hands. "Y-Yeah...Neesan...what happened? You were so depressed yesterday. You wouldn't even look at me."

She opened her eyes wide and blinked at him, making a cutesy "Ooo..." noise. She pointed to herself. "Xue was?"

He was even more confused by her use of third person. "Y-Yeah. Dad was here until two in the morning visiting you, and he said you didn't talk to him at all."

She made a thinking sound, then perked up. "Daddy and Xue were watching movies! Talking during movies is a no-no! Shhh! Gotta be reeeeal quiet!"

"Movies?"

"Yeah-huh! Movies! Xue was really small! And Seta was a baby!" She eyed the bag, her tongue barely sticking out to lick her lips. "Is that for Xue?"

He handed the bag to her. "Yeah...Here..."

She grabbed it happily and took out the cinnamon bun hiding inside. "Yay! Xue's favorite!" She stuffed it in her mouth. "Fayn kyu!"

When their parents finally arrived, they stared at the girl in awe. She was as happy-go-lucky as she had been as a child. They asked her questions about her friends, her favorite TV shows - general knowledge. She answered them in a similar way that she would have three months before.

"I don't know what to make of this," Rong said as she studied her daughter watching television. "It seems that she hasn't forgotten anything, so she's only a child in terms of personality. From what we asked her, she's still as smart as she's always been, so I don't really get--"

"Where'd Tadashi go?"

The three of them stared at Xue, who was clutching her Ainu bear and looking at them with curious eyes. They looked at each other. Did she really not remember? What should they tell her? Could their answer send her back into her depression?

"Well? Where's Tadashi? Xue wants to know!"

Before the men could say anything, Rong quickly turned to her and put her hand on the girl's shoulder. "He moved away, sweetie."

Her eyes widened innocently. "Moved...away?"

Rong nodded slowly. "Yes. His father was transferred to another station, so he needed to leave right away. He couldn't say goodbye to you since you were sick." She hugged her. "I know you'll miss him very much, but just remember all the good times the two of you had together."

Xue sniffled. "But we were real good friends!" she cried.

"I know you were, but he's gone now, Xue. You won't be seeing him anymore."

The girl cried childish tears as they watched, studying her in an effort to tell if her downward spiral would resume. When she finally stopped, she wiped her eyes, which brightened right away.

"Can we go home now? Only grown-up shows are on TV and Xue's bored."

* * *

When she was finally discharged, Xue skipped to the car, beaming at her brother, who gave her a shaky smile back.

Her new, or rather, renewed, child-like persona took some time to get used to. With all the commotion about her change in character, in addition to the drama surrounding her extended leave of absence and her need to repeat her final year of high school, they switched her to a private academy nearby. Seta followed, attending a school as close to hers as possible so he could make sure she got home each day. Every day she would skip and spin down the sidewalk, keeping her hands at her side only when she really needed to. She obviously didn't mind another year of school. As Rong had inferred, Xue had retained the intelligence of a high school senior, making the repetition a possible task.

Just as things were simmering down and Xue was making friends at her new school, they were almost sent back into the hellish pit of despair they had been in for months.

It started when the Usui parents heard a thud from the hallway. A wail came a moment later. They looked out to see Xue holding her arm and bawling like a toddler. After exchanging nervous glances, they went to help her.

"Are you alright?" they asked.

She nodded through her sniffles.

"Alright, let me see," Rong said gently.

Xue held out her arm, which her mother turned over to study. She caught a glimpse of her wrist and her eyes shot open.

"Well, it looked like it's not bruised or broken. You as fit as a fi--"

Her daughter tore the arm away from her and examined her wrist. Her face went pale. She grabbed her head and screamed.

Rong and HoroHoro stared at her in disbelief. He finally grabbed her by her shoulders and shook her.

"What is it, Xue? What's wrong?!"

"That's right…I killed him…" she mumbled. "I shouldn't be alive…I…" She moaned and her body started trembling.

He turned to his wife and gave her a quick nod. She ran into the kitchen and rummaged through the kit the hospital had given them upon Xue's discharge. With her innocent demeanor, they thought they wouldn't have to use it, but Rong found herself staring at the syringe containing the necessary sedative. It took another wail before she even thought of snatching it and running back into the room.

She uncapped it, throwing the plastic carelessly behind her. With HoroHoro holding the patient in place, she injected the needle into Xue's arm, causing her to cry out once more. About a minute later, the drug took effect, and Xue leaned into her father's chest in slumber.

They put her to bed, surveying her as they tried to understand her reaction. It didn't take them long to figure out what the trigger had been.

"Please don't let those months of hell come back," Rong whispered. "I don't think I'd be able to stand watching her anymore."

He rubbed her back. "I know. I don't think I could, either."

"But what are we going to do? We can't just cut her wrists off! She's going to have to look at them again at some point in her life!"

He lowered his head in thought, looking around the floor of her room. It still hadn't been cleaned since she had come home, so some winter accessories were scattered about. A coat…a hat…a scarf…a pair of mittens…

The wheels in his head turned, and he finally looked up. "Yeah, you're right. At some point, she'll have to. But for now, she doesn't need to."

The next morning, Pirika was called, who came and assisted Rong in weaving some arm warmers for her niece. In the meantime, HoroHoro presented Xue with some blue sweatbands from his store. At first, Xue, who had woken up with her childish personality restored, was skeptical. He knew he had to find some way to make it appealing, especially in the summer.

"It's a game," he said.

She cocked her head. "A game?"

"That's right! It's called Don't Take Your Arm Warmers Off. The game never ends, so you can't take them off unless Mom or I say to. If you do, you lose the game!"

"What does Xue get if Xue wins?!" she asked excitedly.

"Something really awesome!" he replied, though he had absolutely nothing planned. "You'll find out once you win! Sound like fun?"

She hopped. "Yeah! Xue wants to play!"

"'Atta girl!" he cried, pumping his arm. "So let's put these babies on you!" He slipped the sweatbands over the scars, hiding them from her view.

She admired them. "Pretty!"

"Mom and Aunt Pirika are making real arm warmers for you, so you'll have a whole rainbow of them!"

"Yay!" She hopped around the room, calling out colors to make an ode to the rainbow.

Seta watched sadly from the doorway. He took out his cell phone and scrolled through the pictures he had taken. The picture from the festival last June came up, but he quickly went past it. His face fell as he came to one of his sister putting an arm around his neck, giving the victory sign as she got ready to lead her brother into his new school.

As her cocky smiles flashed across the screen, he couldn't help but wonder if the protective, loving sister who would beat up bullies for him without a second thought was truly gone forever.

* * *

**February 12, 2025**

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* * *

**"You're not the only one who lost four years of their life, Tadashi," Xue said quietly. "I honestly don't remember anything that's happened since that day. I remember what I learned in school, but that's it. The memories aren't there." She looked down, listless. "I don't remember my high school graduation, my college orientation – hell, I don't even know which one I'm going to, or if I'm even going to one at all."

Tadashi couldn't stop himself from gazing up at her with remorseful eyes. He hadn't anticipated this. He had thought that their business would be taken care of quickly, but no, it was drawn out like this.

_Don't go soft…This is what she wants…She's trying to manipulate you again…_

"I've missed my parent's 'platinum' anniversary, haven't I?" she continued after rattling off other momentous occasions. She glanced over her shoulder minimally. "Hey…Ren…Have I missed your Guan Li? Lien's Ji Li? Your coming of age ceremonies…have I missed them both?"

The Tao heir didn't know whether to be touched or annoyed that she was thinking about something so trivial at a time like this. "No," he finally replied. "Those are still three years away."

She smiled. "Good…" She looked down, then up again. "Seta…did he ever confess to her? Lien, I mean…Has he told her he loves her yet?"

He smirked. "No, you haven't missed that, either. He's too much of a chicken to do it."

She turned back around and closed her eyes, a small smile on her face. "Heh. It's nice to know he hasn't changed. You'll have to fill me in on everything that's happened later."

"…There won't be a 'later'."

Xue and Tadashi locked eyes. His ruthless leer was back. She swallowed, a part of her ignoring what she knew he had become.

"What makes you say that?"

"Like I told you…"

He crossed his right hand over to grab her right shoulder, then threw her off of him. She hurried to stand, flipping onto her stomach, but a kick knocked her back into the mud. His shadow covered her as she gazed up at him.

"Like I said…You're going to die tonight," he said coldly. "You're going to die so I can finally rest in peace knowing that you got what was coming to you. I'll make sure it's as slow and as painful as I can possibly make it." He grinned. "I'll see to it personally."

She glanced at the praying puppet behind her, then past her killer to the scion tied to ground. She looked down in thought, then met his eyes once more.

"You want revenge, I understand that. What I don't understand is why you've dragged the Tao Twins into this if _I'm_ the one you're after."

He seemed unmoved. "It was part of the bargain."

"…Bargain?"

He nodded. "When I was wallowing in Hell by myself – suicide is still murder, you know – Hao-sama called to me from the chains the King of Spirits had put him in over two decades ago. He said he would give me another chance to live so I could make you suffer for what you did to me. In exchange, I would make all the necessary preparations for his revival."

Horror filled her eyes. "Revival?! HAO?!! Why would you do that?! How do you even _plan_ on doing that?!"

Tadashi chortled. "It's quite simple, really. Just your run-of-the-mill ritual." He gestured to Lien. "Get the purest girl I can find and have her recite the prayer the ritual requires. Of course, she needs to have some shamanic power. With a skank like you out of the running, Tao Lien, the daughter of one of the Five Warriors, was the natural choice. Hell, virginity aside, she's _still_ the **best** choice."

He watched a twinge of pain show on her face, then went on, satisfied at her pain.

"With her as a sacrifice, his spirit...his soul will be brought back with my body as the vessel."

"But…doesn't that mean…"

"Yeah, I'll die again. Those were the terms of the contract. I'll have gotten my revenge by then, so there will be no reason for me to be alive anyway."

The thought of him dying again, maybe even in front of her, made her feel like her heart was being emptied out; she felt a void. In its place, a film of his final moments played over and over again on an endless loop, reminding her of horror she had been forced to witness. She panted a few times before looking up at him again. She slowly reached out to him.

"But you're alive now, aren't you? Why go through with this? Couldn't we just work it out between us? Just talking?" Her eyes burned. "I've missed you so much…you have no idea…I can't remember the things I've done these last four years, but I could never forget the loneliness of you not being there, the feeling I had every day of how much I missed you…I just want things to go back to the way they were. R-Remember what you said?"

He looked down at her apathetically. She laughed nervously.

"You said…You said that we could be happy…for many years to come…Can't we start that now? We've both missed out on the past four years…We can just start over, can't we? Tadashi…? Please…?"

It was quiet as the former lovers stared at each other. From under her umbrella, Suo peered out from behind a fan. She slowly removed a tag from her sleeve. She bit her thumb to draw some blood, then paused for barely a second before using the red ink to write kanji vertically down the parchment. Her eyes didn't leave Tadashi as she awaited his reply.

"_That boy…That foolish human…If he shows any signs of betrayal, as long as he's served his purpose, feel free to kill him. Hopefully, if he did things correctly, I'll have a much more powerful body there waiting for me."_

"Ah well, it was nice to have a son again for a few days." She cackled. "But all useful things must eventually be thrown away."

* * *

"What?!"

"I said, 'Our plane is being delayed, so you'll probably get there first.'"

"B-But Mom!" Seta cried into his phone. "I don't know how to get to Tao Castle by myself!"

"Well, you're not by yourself, Hana's with you," Rong said slyly. "And if you both get lost, just call and hopefully Li will send someone to come get you."

He made a worried noise. "What should we do when we get there?"

"Just dance right in there and do some comedy routine or something. Anything to lighten the mood. Relieve some of the tension over there."

"A-Alright…"

"There's a good boy. We'll see you when we get there, okay?"

"Okay…"

"Love you."

"I love you too, Mom. Tell Dad that as well…please…"

"I will, bye." She hung up and turned to her husband. "Seta says, 'I love you'."

HoroHoro smiled. "That's Seta for you – always making sure no one's left out."

"Pfft!" Rong put the phone in her bag. "He's been leaving Lien out for – what? Ten, eleven years now?"

He frowned. "That's different, and you know it."

"Yeah, I know. I just hope he follows through this time. Remember that episode with the knife-dagger-thing? He was so devastated by her reaction."

The Ainu sighed. "Yeah, well, when you shyly hand a girl a machete you made and don't tell her what it means, of course you're going to end up disappointed."

A beat of silence.

"Hey…How come _I_ never got a dagger from _you_? Does that mean we were never actually going out?!"

"You're bringing this up after 23 years?!"

Glaring contest.

"Fine, FINE! I'll make you one when we get home."

"Victory!"

The mood suddenly soured.

Love.

Disappointment.

Blades.

Victory.

"…I hope Xue's alright."

"All we can do is hope we can get there soon – before it's too late."

"…Before Tadashi kills her."


	86. Burning Passion

Here we are! I'm hoping to get a couple more chapters out before the end of the summer. Mark my words. I'll have Andy make sure that I do. I owe it to you guys. Thanks for your support! :3

I also have a new poll up concerning if you'd read an alternate ending if I wrote one. Vote if you have time/feel like it/care. Thanks!

In spite of myself, I cried while writing this chapter. Oh, gosh was it hard to write the very end. I may have overused the exclamation points, but I hope you get the sense of urgency of the situation.

I also used "Into the Fire" from the Bleach Movie 1 as my inspiration. More bawwwing. Gosh, I'm a softie.

**Notes: More spoilers from KZB 288**

**Ren tells Sheng to "live up to her family name". This refers to fact that the surname "Wei" means "protect".**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks. **

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Six: Burning Passion**

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"Ow!"

After a quick intake of breath, Seta put his left index finger in his mouth and sucked on it. Hana glanced over.

"With all this turbulence, it's probably not a good idea to be sewing."

"I know, but I really want to get this done for Lien. I won't have time to finish it at her house. P-Plus..." He glanced out the window before quickly slamming down the plastic shield to hide it. "I need to distract myself somehow."

There was an ascending dinging noise before a female voice sounded through the speakers.

"Good evening passengers. Please take your seats and fasten your seat belts. Please also make sure your tray table is in the upright and locked position. We are preparing to land at Guizhou Airport, where the time is currently 11:16 pm with scattered showers throughout the province. Again, please take your seats and prepare for landing.

"Well, I guess you should hurry up," Hana said, looking up at the intercom. "You're running out of time."

Seta grunted as he stitched as fast as he could. Predictably, his small cries and thumb sucking heightened in frequency. Hana smiled softly, then allowed his gaze to drift to the ground. Seeing that his friend's cellphone had fallen under the seat in front of them, he used his foot to sweep it over to him, then leaned down and picked it up. With its owner distracted, he opened it and began fiddling with the controls.

His mother never allowed him to have a cellphone, explaining simply that she didn't feel like paying for it. With this, his clicking around seemed to yield nothing of interest, that is, until he found a folder of pictures and managed to find a way to scroll through it.

The vast majority of them were of Lien, which didn't surprise him in the least. There were a few that Seta had gotten her to pose for, sometimes with him, sometimes alone. There was also a series of pictures that were candid, and most of them blurry due to the boy's shaking hands. Hana was amused by them, but his smile faded.

A picture of Xue and Tadashi popped up, causing him to stop and stare at it, confused. _Why would Seta still have these?_ In fact, there were numerous pictures of Tadashi still in the folder, including the one he had taken at the fire festival.

Hana glanced over at him before dropping the phone into the boy's bag.

_I hate that guy._

**

* * *

**

"Which way did they go, Sheng?" Ren asked curtly.

The warrior glanced around, pointing into the forest. "That way, Milord."

"Alright. Just try to keep up." He snapped the reins and his horse galloped into the brush. Sheng followed on her own steed, though not as fast.

Her eyes were fixed on the man in front of her. She bit her tongue, trying to take her mind off the guilt and shame she felt for allowing Lien to run off. To her, whatever happened on the mountain was her fault.

_If only I had been stronger...like Lady Pin-Mei's guard...then I would have been able to stop Huan..._

"Stop thinking about your defeat."

She looked up to see that Ren had been glancing over his shoulder at her. Upset, she inhaled deeply, desperate to keep her eyes from burning. "But I've failed you! I failed Lady Lien!" she cried. "How am I supposed to hold my head high knowing how inferior I am?! How can I even carry the pride of the Wei family when I fail to live up to the prowess and strength held by the women who came before me?!"

He sighed and slowed to a trot. "Get over here so I can get those useless thoughts out of your head."

She obediently trotted beside him, regretting her outburst. "I apologize for my insolence, Lord Ren. It's because of me that we're wasting so much time. I'm just a--"

"Silence."

Sheng shrunk even more, knowing she was about to be scolded.

"Pin-Mei's guard..." he mused, playing along with Wei Geming's deceit, "...she was exceptional, yes, and knew how to handle most situations, but she had her faults. Her feelings sometimes clouded her judgment."

"Milord?"

"She loved Pin-Mei very much, that I know. That love went to an extreme, much farther than it should have. It made her soft at times, so her combat skills suffered. But..."

He smiled inwardly.

"I also know that those feelings made her strong, and that's why Pin-Mei stayed alive long enough for us to reunite. She seemed ready to sacrifice herself for her if and whenever she needed to. She never saw her death as something to fear. She never spoke of it as if it was something always on her mind. Pin-Mei was her world. When it came time for her services to end, I could tell how much she would miss being with her."

His eyes lowered, remembering the young, vivacious bodyguard who had shown such hatred and jealousy towards him as a child, overly protective of her mistress. He remembered how she had thrown the shoe in his face when they met again as young adults, then thrown him out of the room moments later. He remembered her painfully crawling to him inside the pillar of light to help him continue his ritual. The look of hope in her eyes as she snapped his fingers back into place, the faith she must have had to trust his hunch and his reckless actions. Her exit from the stage as a warrior...that simple, "Thank you" before she left the title of "captain of the guards", the surname of "Wei" behind and traded them for "mother", "wife", and "Usui".

He gripped the reins and stopped the horse. For some reason, something that he couldn't quite put his finger on, the very thought that this failure was trying to mimic such a magnificent maidservant made him seethe with anger.

_There's no comparison. Sheng is at a much lower level than Rong. She hasn't spent as much time with Lien as Rong did with Pin-Mei. She'll almost be more of a hindrance than an assistance in this situation. She doesn't love Lien nearly as much as Rong loved Pin-Mei. In fact she..._ His eyes shot open.

Sheng curiously paused and moved closer beside him. Her head tilted "My lord...?"

"You..." he whispered coldly. "You want to know the difference between the two of you?"

She stared at him, then nodded eagerly. "Yes, of course, My Liege! Anything to make me of better service to Lady Lien!"

Ren grabbed one of the girl's bladed tonfas and slashed it up the side of her face. Red hair fluttered down from where he had cut her, allowing her to stare at him with both eyes for once, now obviously bewildered.

"M-My Lord...What was that for?"

"I suggest that if you want to be like the person you seem to admire so much, you should learn to love Lien instead of getting distracted by her brother."

She froze. "I-I'm not sure I follow..."

He scoffed at her. "For some reason I ignored your obvious inattentiveness to my daughter since Ren was around her so much and could protect her. But you slacked off even after he became locked away. You sometimes watched Pin-Mei stand at the entrance of the dungeon, so don't think I didn't see you. You were more worried about Ren so you stood watch over that door, which gave Huan all the time she needed to brainwash Lien and provoke her to run away."

Sheng's horse began backing up. "I...I..."

"Feel free to love him all you want, Sheng. He's innocent, after all. But don't think that I'll approve of someone so cowardly that they won't even hint at their emotions directly the way Seta does, or even consider allowing you into the family."

She bit her lip and gripped the reins tightly. "Yes, My Lord."

"That said, despite the fact that I sought to abolish some of your family's more foolish rituals, due to your poor performance as her guard and maidservant, if Lien dies, you won't be too far behind her.

"Now, I suggest you live up to your family name and protect Lien with your life, and love her more than Ren." He murmured under his breath. "He probably wouldn't return your feelings anyhow."

He trotted past her, then paused again.

"And another thing – I cut your hair because Rong never had hers in her eyes the way you always do."

The girl's eyes widened. "R-Rong? Who's that...? Wait! Is she--?!"

Ren dashed off, trying to make up for lost time. When he glanced back, Sheng was catching up to him, her eyes slightly red from his tongue lashing.

_So much for casting doubt away._ He sighed. _Ah well. Jun said that Anna had to smack Rong around a bit before she could bring herself to serve me. Let's just hope that Sheng will be the same way._

**

* * *

**

"Can't we, Tadashi? Please?"

Tadashi looked down at her. "You want me to just stop all of this now, and then you and I can ride off into the sunset?"

She nodded slowly, hope shining in her eyes as she reached out to him. "I still love you, that hasn't changed, not one bit. Just let me show you that...again."

More silence. The only audible sound was the quiet murmur of Lien's chanting. Tadashi studied her, his eyes dissecting her heart and her thoughts. Finally, stone-faced, he gave his answer.

"No."

She looked at him, devastated. "No...?"

He shook his head. "No. Not this time, Xue. I can't forgive you for what you've done. I have no reason to break the contract. Hao-sama hasn't let me down, and I'm a man of my word. I promised to help revive him, and that's what I'm going to do." He grinned and opened his palm, a bright ball of flames rising from it. "I've been looking forward to this for a long time, Xue. No matter what you say, I'm going to fulfill my end of the contract. I'm going to make sure that Lien is sacrificed and that Hao-sama is revived. If anyone else comes to help, I'll burn them to a crisp. Heh...How would anyone be able to find us anyway?" He paused, then quickly closed the fist in irritation, the fire disappearing. "Wait, how did _you_ get here?"

Xue was occupied with staring into space, still not able to believe that the Tadashi she loved was gone forever. Furious when she didn't reply, he seethed and stomped up to her. He yanked her up by her collar.

"Tell me! How did you find us here?!"

"I don't know..." she whispered finally. "I think I might have just sensed that Ren and Lien were here. Otherwise, I would've just gone to Tao Castle."

He swiveled and glared at Suo. "Kaasan, you and Hao-sama didn't say anything about being able to sense people and where they are! How do you explain this, huh?!"

The woman sighed lethargically and fanned herself. "Tada-darling, we didn't say anything because sensing furyoku is second nature for us."

"Neither of you even told me what that furry-whatever is!"

Another sigh. "Neither of us have the time to hold your hand, either. It's your own fault for being born a human that you wouldn't grasp such a simple concept instantly."

The puppet grit his teeth and dropped the Ainu. He stomped over to Lien and snapped his fingers in her face. "C'mon, Princess, hurry it up. Let's get this over with."

Ren's eyes narrowed. _He knows what will happen when Lien's done. It's like suicide all over again._

Tadashi folded his arms and stared at the girl kneeling in the now glowing circle, chanting her life away. He suddenly snapped his fingers again, this time in realization.

"Oh, right. Silly me." He smiled. "Take your time, Lien. I still have something, or rather, someone, that I need to take care of." He chuckled. "Wow, how could I forget?"

Xue looked up as he approached. He frowned when she didn't move or even flinch.

"Go on, run. Make it more fun for me."

Her head drooped. "No. I won't."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Oh, why not?"

She stumbled to her feet, taking out her ikupasuy. "Believe me, I want to run...but I know that I can't."

Tadashi gave a sound of amusement. "Why's that?"

"Because I know that if I run away, you and that scheming hag over there will get your way...And I know that I wouldn't be able to look my parents in the eye ever again." She glared up at him. "In other words, I can't let things go 'just as planned' for you, Tadashi."

He tilted his head. "What's with the sudden change in attitude? Just a moment ago you were one step away from being a sniveling crybaby. Just a useless whore..."

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" she screamed.

His grin vanished as he blinked at her, surprised that she was finally fighting back.

"I'm _not_ a whore. I'm _not_. I'm sick of you calling me that," she said darkly. "It's like you think it's my name or something, or that you think it's okay to call women that 'just because'." She wiped her eyes. "Having sex with someone you love doesn't make you a whore, or a slut, or anything like that. I'd appreciate it if you and everyone else who thinks it's okay to call someone that would get it through their heads!" She panted before her head drooped again.

Tadashi studied her before offering a half-hearted apology. "Alright, then, _Xue_, now that you've thrown your temper tantrum, would you mind telling me what's suddenly made you willing to fight me?"

"I was...in denial," she said quietly after gathering her thoughts. "I didn't want to believe that you had changed this much. But then I realized something."

"Oh? And what would that be?"

She raised her head, tears in her eyes. "The Meihou Tadashi that I love with all my heart and soul died four years ago. I played a role in driving him to suicide, but he was the one who pulled the trigger." She smiled sadly. "You look exactly like him. You sound exactly like him. Even the Kansai accent is the same. But you're _not_ him. So that's why I know I have to fight you, and why I know that I can."

He stared at her, dumbfounded. "How can you say that I'm not him? I'm standing right here in front of you! I came here just to kill you! I know what you did! I know everything about you! All your likes and dislikes! That scar on the back of your left thigh that you got when Seta pricked you with a knife he was making, I know about that, too! How can you deny who I am?!"

"That's just it..." she said softly. "My Tadashi never thought of revenge, no matter how angry he was. Even when the police found that gang member that shot his father and brought him in, he told me that he thought he could forgive him someday, and I know he was telling the truth."

"B-But that's..."

"Until the very end, he told me he loved me, and that he could never hurt me. You're not him."

He clenched his fists. "So you're just going to stand there and pretend I'm some mirage?!"

She shook her head. "Not at all. I know you're there, but you're not the Tadashi I love. You've changed too much. I guess these last four years have given you time to hate me. I could respect that." She looked past him at Lien. "But you've dragged innocent people into this, and you've become involved with people who have little respect for lives that aren't theirs. My Tadashi wouldn't do that. You may be Tadashi, you may have come back to life, but I'm sorry...you're not the Tadashi I love."

He was frozen. Nothing was going the way he expected. He had expected – no, he had wanted – her to fall to her knees and beg for her life just before he dealt the final blow. He had wanted the apologies to spew out, unrelenting and unstoppable. But he wasn't going to get any of that. Instead, he was going to get a fight.

Xue raised the ikupasuy. "I'm sorry, Tadashi, I really am. I really don't want to kill you again, believe me. This time...This time I'll make sure that I lead your spirit to the afterlife. I promise."

There was a moment of silence before a maniacal laugh filled the air. Tadashi grinned.

"Do you really think that I'll just stand here and let you kill me? Really, Xue? Really?!"

She looked up at him sadly. "I guess I was kind of hoping for that, but I know that with how much you hate me, you won't just go quietly."

"No shit!" he yelled. "Oooh! This is going to be wonderful! A weakling like you fighting me to the death! I can hardly contain myself!" His hands became engulfed in flames.

Xue closed her eyes in remorse for a few moments, then began to focus her mind.

_I know I've abandoned you these past four years...but please...I need you now..._

She snapped her head up, her eyes open.

"Kiro!"

A few moments later, there was a high-pitched chirp. Xue smiled as the koropokkuru appeared next to her.

"Thanks, Kiro," she whispered. "I'm sorry I ignored you all these years. Thanks for sticking by me." She smiled. "I know it's been a while, but ready to be superheroes?" The spirit smiled and nodded. "Alright!" She gave a determined grin. "Kiro! Hyoi Gattai! In ikupasuy!"

There was a flash of pale blue light as the oversoul formed. She gazed down at the kendama-shaped glow she was holding, then back at her adversary.

"I'm rusty, Kiro, like I know you probably are, but let's do this. A lot of things depend on whether we win or lose. We can't let everyone down!"

Tadashi covered his mouth to stifle some laughter, then finally just let it out. "Really?! _Really_?!! You think giving yourself some sort of noble justice speech is going to help you?! Oh gawd...your IQ's really suffered from you acting like a two year-old. The Xue I know was one of the best in her class; she was one of the smartest girls I knew. She'd never think that some pep talk would be enough to save her ass!"

"I never said I thought it would save me. I just know that I can't be selfish. I'm not the only one involved." She put her hand over her head. "I want my family to be safe. I want my dad to keep running the store that he loves so much and worked so hard for. I want my mom to keep being the housewife-by-day-bouncer-by-night woman she is – the person I admire most." She smiled. "And Seta...he has his whole life ahead of him. And the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with is Lien, so if completing the ritual means sacrificing her, then it's just another reason to stop you."

She put her hand over the ikupasuy, and the glowing spread. Xue pulled her arm back, glaring at him. "Konru Ruyampe Tasuy!"

A rush of ice surged toward him. Before he could counter or evade the attack, it encased him in a frozen prison. Xue panted as she stared at her former lover through the ice. Tears came to her eyes as the realization of what she had done hit her. She covered her face with her hands and shook her head. After a few moments. She wiped her eyes and turned to Ren.

"Well, then," she said with a deep breath. "Let me see if I can freeze those things off of you."

Before she could even kneel down to his level, there was a loud shattering sound from behind her. Xue slowly turned around, horrified to see Tadashi alive and brushing himself off.

_H-How did he break out of the ice?! It should have frozen him so much that he's pretty much dead! How is this even remotely possible?!_

He shivered. "Jeez, that's cold!" He looked up at Xue's horrified expression and gave her a pitying smile. "Aw, don't look so surprised, Princess. Did you really think that you, who hasn't done any training in four years, could freeze me, someone who's been blessed with Hao-sama's power? Come on, don't be foolish." He snickered. "You're not even half as strong as your dad was when he was your age. But you know...you two _are_ alike in one respect."

She bit her lip. "What do you mean?"

The grin grew. "Do you think your mom was the only person your dad ever loved?"

"He...He never mentioned anyone else..."

"Hmm...Interesting..."

Xue began to look visibly shaken. "W-What?! What is it?!"

He scoffed at her. "Wei Rong wasn't his first love. No way. He found his first love long before the Shaman Fight even happened...but they basically ended up the same way we did."

"You...mean...she...?"

"Yeah. She died."

She exhaled, closed her eyes, and clenched her fists.

"Oh, but that's not all! You're even more alike than you think! You see..." Tadashi smirked as he got ready to drop the final bombshell.

"He_ killed her._"

Xue's eyes widened once again as her mind tried to process what she was hearing. The father she looked up to, who had taught her about her Ainu heritage and shamanic practices was a _murderer?_

"You...You're lying!" she shouted. "My father would never hurt anyone! He never even spanked me or Seta when we were younger! He doesn't have it in him to kill someone!"

Tadashi shrugged. "People change, I suppose. He was young. Maybe he realized what a monster he was and decided to change. Still doesn't change the fact that an innocent girl died because of how cold-hearted he was...Just like how I died because of you, Xue."

Her eyes quivered. "But...that's..."

"Same eyes...Same nose...Same mouth...Same smile...Same hair...Same heart...The both of you are so alike. Such a Daddy's Girl, aren't you, Xue?"

His words barely registered in her mind – it was elsewhere. Suddenly, all of those attempts by her father to coax her into talking about how she felt about Tadashi's death made sense. Now, it was clear that when he said...

"_I know how you feel..."_

...he wasn't lying. He had truly understood what it felt like to lose someone he loved, to live on knowing that it was his fault that he nor anyone else would never see them again. She had pushed him away. The one person who could have provided her with the true sense of comfort she longed for and needed so badly had been right next to her the entire time, and she had pushed him away. She had shoved him away with all of her might.

At that moment, she had a hard time deciding if she felt more guilty about pushing Tadashi over the edge, or if it felt worse to know that she had told her father that he had no idea what she was feeling; that he had never lost someone he loved.

"_You were just doing what you thought was right at the time."_

Those words still rang true. She had thought that it was right for her to separate herself from Tadashi during a time when they should have united as one. She had thought that it was right for her to push everyone around her away and never let anyone know what she was thinking after Tadashi's death.

_What if the same was true for Dad...?_

She looked up. "You make it sound like he murdered her in cold blood, Tadashi."

He snickered. "I'm just going by what Hao-sama told me. He knew all about it, after all. One of the benefits of mind-reading."

To his surprise, Xue smiled. "Well, I'm guessing Dad was pretty young when this happened, seeing as how he met Mom when he was sixteen, and you said it was long before the Shaman Fight. Therefore...it was an accident."

Tadashi stared at her, astonished. "How would you know that?!"

She giggled. "I tend to think that if it was on purpose, he would have had some sort of legal consequence to pay, don't you think?"

Tadashi looked infuriated. "You have no idea what happened!"

"You're right. Dad hasn't decided to tell us yet. I only want to know the full story from his mouth and his alone." She took another fighting stance, the smile still bright on her face. "Thanks, Tadashi. You've given me some motivation to make it through this alive. I want to live long enough to thank my dad for never leaving my side while I was in the hospital, and apologize for forcing him to relive whatever it is that he went through so he could try to comfort me, even though I kept pushing him away." The smile vanished. "But first, I have to sin once again."

The ground began to freeze around her, a small wall building in front of Ren. He shivered, but offered no complaint, understanding the protective measures that she was trying to take. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, then concentrated on the young man in front of her.

"You really think a weak barrier like that is going to do anything?" Tadashi said in a nasty tone.

"I can't involve him. This is between you and me. No one else."

A ball of fire appeared in his hand. "I think you'll want other people to get involved once you know what I'm capable of, Xue. It's not a smart decision to go it alone."

"No. This is _my_ fight. Not Ren's, not Lien's, not Uncle Ren's or Auntie Pin-Mei's, not Seta's, not my parents'. _Mine_."

When he said nothing, she pulled back to release the kendama again. "I'm sorry that I have to do this,Tadashi...Ruya---"

She stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes wide with fear. She looked up at the spirit standing behind Tadashi, unable to even think about running, which her mind was desperately trying to tell her to do.

Tadashi smirked. "Looks like you're the one frozen here, Xue."

The wall of ice melted away, and Ren looked up, his worst fears being realized.

Towering over Tadashi was the Spirit of Fire.

Finally, Xue found it in her to take a simple step back. "H-H-How..."

"That's right. Hao-sama entrusted the Spirit of Fire to me until his arrival. It's nice to have around, really." He looked up at the spirit as if it were a precious pet. "So loyal once you know how to control it, and so powerful, too. Honestly, you should have realized it sooner. You too, Ren. I mean, how else could I use fire the way I have been doing? I'm no black mage."

"But...Lyserg...the Spirit of Fire is his...So how could you...?"

"Hm? Oh, right, yeah, I see what you're asking." He smiled calmly, as if recalling a family pastime. "If you could ask Lien, she'd probably tell you about how I thoughtfully called her from my vacation in London with Kaasan. While we were there, we visited someone both your dads know pretty damn well. He gave it to us."

She tensed. "That's a lie...Lyserg's not foolish enough to just hand over a spirit that powerful to whoever comes to his doorstep!"

He snapped his fingers. "Darn! You saw through me!" He reached behind him and tossed a pendulum at her.

It spun a few times before coming to a stop. As the realization dawned on her, she covered her mouth with her free hand.

"You see, Xue, while they can be very loyal, spirits are also very fickle at times," Tadashi explained nonchalantly. "If their master dies and they are free of any control, it doesn't take much for someone to claim it as their own. Hao-sama told me all I needed to know."

She fell to her knees and clutched the pendulum. "Why...Why do you keep involving all these people who have nothing to do with this?! I'm sure he was living his life quietly with Jeanne and their children! Why would you ever want to disturb that?!"

"Meh, whatever, he was by himself anyway. I'm sure she and the kids found him when they got home."

Xue stood up and glared at him before putting the pendulum near Ren for safekeeping.

"It's decided. I officially loathe you, Tadashi. I don't care about what happens to a murderer like you."

"That's funny coming from someone like y--"

"Shut up. _You_ killed _yourself_."

He frowned. The sense of power he held over her seemed to have weakened significantly.

"Let's go, Kiro." With determination in her eyes, she rushed toward him.

Her right fist engulfed in the spirit's blue light, she lunged and aimed for his cheek. With seemingly no effort at all, Tadashi caught the fist, then forced it toward the ground, twisting her arm. When she let out a grunt of pain, he gave an evil grin.

"Maybe it's a poor choice for a shaman to resort to hand-to-hand combat when dealing with a spirit like mine. What happened to the Kendama, anyway?"

She struggled under his grip. "That...was...my dad's...idea..."

"Oh? Can't you think for yourself? You're a big girl, aren't you?"

She looked up at him with her own grin. "Of course...Kiro! Teke hara ta!"

"'Teke hara ta'? What the hell does that me--?!"

He was cut off by a hard left hook. Stumbling, he let go of her and grabbed his face. When he looked up at her again, he noticed that the glow had moved to her left hand.

"Oh, I see how it is...Tricky, tricky Xue...I take it you came up with that yourself?"

"Of course," she said, standing. "I outgrew the kendama by the time I was 13. That's also when I had to seriously start defending Seta and myself from our classmates. Back then, I used a ring on one finger of each hand as a medium for Kiro's oversoul while training. I don't have any rings on now, but the arm warmers work just fine."

Kiro peeped, and Xue glanced down to see the arm warmer beaming up at her.

_Kiro...She doesn't seem the slightest bit mad at me or resentful that I tossed her aside for all these years...Like she's just been waiting patiently for me to come back..._

"Hey, I suggest you stop crying and actually get ready to fight me, Xue." Tadashi was grinning angrily. She knew that he wasn't going to stall any longer.

"Alright, have it your way," she said calmly. "I'm about as ready as I'll ever be." She tried not to quiver as her gaze wandered to the Spirit of Fire. _I...I'm not going to make it out of this alive, am I? I was ready to start my life over, to go to Tokyo University and make Dad's dream come true...I want to live...I'm not suicidal like I was before I began acting like a child again. I...I WANT TO LIVE!!_

Tadashi saw the fear in her eyes and chuckled. "That's the look I've been waiting for. You've finally realized that there's no escape. I have to admit, it's a little bittersweet to kill you, but I know that I won't get another chance like this ever again."

Xue grasped her head and shook it frantically. _No! Don't give up yet! You don't know if Mom and Dad or Ren or Auntie Pin-Mei are on their way to help! If I can just hold him off, then they can save Lien!_

She took a deep breath. "Come at me, Tadashi. I'm not afraid of you."

His eyes narrowed. "We'll see how long that lasts, now won't we?"

Streams of fire rushed at her, and she did her best to jump, dodge, and roll out of the way. Unsatisfied with the lack of accuracy of his attacks, Tadashi charged at her himself, his right hand covered in flames. He grazed her sleeve, and she quickly used her oversoul to freeze the flare before they could spread.

"You already know you're going to die, Xue, so why not just give up?"

She caught her breath, then grinned up at him triumphantly. "Because I still have an ace in the hole. I have my dad to thank for it."

"Hmmm? A last-ditch effort? Let's see it," he sneered. "Just make it interesting. That way, I won't feel like I've wasted my time."

She ignored him. "Kiro, this is it. When this fails, I want you to go find my parents and whoever else is coming, and lead them here so they can stop the ritual." The spirit cooed at her sadly, but she tried to smile. "It's okay, Kiro. We can spend time together once I pass on." She closed her eyes. "My only real regret is that I'm not in my Ainu robes at a time like this. I'd like to die with honor."

"Sorry, but I can't really let you go home to get them. You'd probably just run away and hide."

"Nah. I wouldn't hide. I'd just let my dad make short work of you. He _is_ the master of the Spirit of Rain, after all."

"Really? Maybe you should try calling it, then, if you're so sure it can compete with my Spirit of Fire."

She shook her head. "I'm not that foolish. I know I wouldn't be able to control it. It would probably consume me. I'll just have to go with the next best thing."

"That's good. I wouldn't want it to take my prey away from me."

"Heh...Let's go, Kiro...One last time." She grasped her ikupasuy tightly. "Oversoul! Nipopo Gauntlets!"

But as the oversoul formed, she fell to her knees.

"Looks like even a weak oversoul like that is too much for you to handle, Xue," Tadashi scoffed.

"Well, I only watched my dad use this oversoul...It's not like he formally passed it down to me or anything..." she panted.

"Tsk, tsk...You should know better than to attempt an oversoul that you've only seen and not practiced. Only a suicidal idiot would try a move like that. I can practically feel your life draining away."

She looked up at him with tired eyes. "What difference does it make? You're about to kill me anyway, so I thought I might as well pull out all the stops...see if I could be strong like my Dad..."

"Well, I think now we all know the answer to that question. So, are you going to attack me, or just fall down dead where you are?" He tapped his foot.

She grinned. "Attack, of course. Who the hell do you think I am?"

"Then what are you waiting for, Xue? Come at me with that stupid Ainu pride of yours."

Painfully, she got to her feet, sweat pouring down her face. _How fucking ironic._ With a cry, she sprinted toward him, her right arm pulled back. Tadashi didn't seem concerned. If fact, he was beckoning her to him.

_This is it...all of my furyoku, every last drop, is going into this one attack...I'll be nothing but a shell after this..._

She grit her teeth as she got ready.

"Shushu Waki -- Kamuiranke Opukeni!!" she yelled as thrust her arm forward.

Tadashi simply raised his hand to her level and caught the icy fist. The blizzard of cold air that came with the punch diverted its path around him. As it ceased, Xue just stared straight ahead, eyes wide with horror.

_It...It should have frozen him at the very least. He should have turned to ice and shattered!! Why...Why is he so powerful?!_

"Well, that didn't seem to help, did it?"

She didn't answer.

"You know, this isn't just another oversoul. It actually meant something to your dad. That's why you can't just go around using it when you don't even get the significance of it." He grabbed the left gauntlet as well as his hands heated up. "This is the end, Usui Xue."

The oversoul shattered, Xue's eyes still quivering in sheer disbelief. With a smirk, Tadashi kicked her in the stomach, sending her flying back into the clearing. A circle of fire surrounded her, preventing her from escaping, not that she had the strength to.

Her koropokkuru floated beside her head and poked her in an effort to revive her. Xue's eyes shifted toward her, then she fisted the mud.

"We lost, Kiro," she whispered.

Kiro let out a small noise of remorse.

"It's all your fault."

The spirit stared at her, stunned.

"You know, if you were even half as strong as Kororo, then I wouldn't be about to die. It's all your fucking fault!"

Kiro clutched her butterbur leaf's stem tightly, shying away from her partner's yells.

"You're so useless...Just get out of here! I'm better off without you!!"

When she still didn't move, Xue swatted at her.

"Don't you get it?! I DON'T WANT YOU ANYMORE!! YOU'RE WEAK AND YOU'RE USELESS, KIRO!!"

Kiro chirped at her frantically, trying to get her master to allow her to stay.

"You...want to help?" Xue whispered.

She nodded.

"Then...GET OUT OF HERE!! AT LEAST GO TELL MY PARENTS WHAT'S GOING ON SO THEY WON'T END UP LIKE ME!!" She hid her eyes. "I never want to see you again, Kiro, so leave. Now."

After a few moments of hesitation, Kiro turned and quickly darted into the forest. Xue finally picked her head up slightly.

"Ah, I see now. You weren't mad at the poor thing at all, were you, Xue?" Tadashi chimed in. "You just wanted her to run away before my Spirit of Fire could make a midnight snack out of her. How noble of you."

"The koropokkuru are dying out...I have to save every one that I possibly can. There's no way I'm going to let that monster have her. Not when she's the best partner I could ever ask for."

Her eyes drifted to the mud again.

_Daddy...It looks like all I do is cause trouble_, she thought. _I pushed you away...I misused your oversoul...I let Kiro down...and now I'm going to die like a fish out of water...I just wish...I just wish I could..._

"Hey, Xue," he called. He tossed his cellphone to her.

She slowly sat up and grasped it, then looked up at him through the flames.

"I still have a little bit of a soft spot for you, Xue, so here's the deal. I know you probably feel like you haven't spoken to your family in a few years, so I'll let you call one of them to say good bye," he said smiling. "Consider it your 'last rites'."

Xue looked down at the mobile. _How do I know they're all together? What if I can only say goodbye to one of them? How do I choose?_

But it only took her a moment to dial her father's cell phone number. As it rang, she breathed deeply. Maybe she could write it off as just a call to say that she was fine. Maybe she could keep her voice steady and be strong, even though she knew that she would be dead within the next five minutes.

But when she heard his voice through the receiver, she knew that there was no chance of either of those happening.

"Hello? Xue?! Are you alright?!"

"Hi, Dad...is Mom there, too?"

"Y-Yeah, she's here," he said glancing at his wife.

"That's good. Seta, too?"

"No...He's on his way to Tao Castle to be with you. We're just taxi-ing around the runway, so we'll be there soon, too!"

"Ah, I see...Could you get him on the line, too?"

He froze. Her voice was low, with more maturity than he had heard in nearly four years.

"Y-Yeah...I can do that. Hold on..."

She tried to giggle. "Holding!" Her eyes looked at the ground sadly again.

Rong watched him as he dialed their son's number. Their eyes met.

"She's...back to her old self...Tadashi must've gotten to her."

"Oh my gods..." she whispered, a hand tentatively covering her mouth.

"Seta, your sister's on the phone. I'm connecting all of us."

"O-Okay..."

"You too, Rong," he whispered. She frantically took out her phone and dialed away.

Her parents and brother instantly bombarded her with questions, but she waited until they died down before saying anything.

"Hey, everyone...Long time no see, right? Ahaha..."

"Neesan, you're..."

"Yeah...I remember what happened now. Tadashi reminded me."

"T-Tadashi-senpai's there?!"

"Yeah, he is. He's not as loving as I remember, though." She made eye contact with Tadashi as she spoke. He seemed emotionless.

"What's happening? Are you alright?!" Rong cried.

"Yeah...about that...That's why I'm calling you guys."

"Xue..."

"Mom, Dad, Seta...I'm going to die here in a couple minutes, but I wanted to say good bye to you all."

There was a moment of silence from her family. Then, at seemingly the same time, their emotions got the better of them.

"N-No...you can't mean that...Just hold on, Neesan! I'll be there in a few minutes!!"

She shook her head, not that they could see. "Sorry, but it's not going to be...in time." Almost as if the reality of her own words had finally hit her, she broke down, tears blinding her vision, her voice raspy. "I...Dad...I'm so sorry..."

"What are you sorry about?!"

"I pushed you away in the hospital when you were trying to help me...I didn't consider your feelings at all! I'm sorry! Thank you...Thank you so much for staying with me the whole time I was there, and never leaving my side! And I...I...tried to use your oversoul, the gauntlets, but I wasn't good enough, I was reckless. I'm sorry that I disrespected you! I'm really really sorry!"

"No, Xue, you didn't d--!!"

"M-Mom!"

"What is it?"

"Thanks for taking care of me all these years! Thanks for letting me live and for giving me the chance to have a long and happy life when you could've taken the easy way out and kept your old life!! I...I've always admired you and Dad for that!! Ever since you told me back in middle school!!"

"Xue, thats--!"

"S-Seta! You...You're the best little brother I could ever ask for!! Thanks for always putting up with me, and for sticking by me when I needed you!!"

"Nee...san..."

"And-And you better fucking confess to Lien once this is all over! Don't make all your hard work be for nothing!! If you...If you don't even try, then I'll haunt you forever, I swear to the gods I will!!"

"I-I will, Neesan...I promise..."

She looked up at Tadashi. His arms were folded, but a hand stuck out, a ball of fire floating in it. She cringed, trying to estimate how much longer she had.

Then, she heard a voice.

"Seta, what the hell is going on?! Is that Xue?!"

"H...Hana...? Is that Hana?!"

"Yeah, Neesan, he's here!"

"Can...Can I talk to him for a minute?"

"Yeah...Sure..."

There was some rustling.

"Xue? What's going on?"

"H-Hana...I'm sorry I threw that flower pot at you...I'm really, so sorry...You didn't deserve that...You were just trying to help me..."

"I forgot about that a long time ago. Why are you bringing it up now?"

_He doesn't know..._ "Hehe...no reason. Can I talk to Seta again? Better yet, can you share the phone with him?"

"Okay."

"Xue..." her father whispered. He was grasping his pant leg, silently cursing how helpless he was. His only daughter was going to die as he listened, and there was nothing he could do.

She could hear Rong sobbing next to him.

"Guys...It's...It's been fun...Really. I know I lived a good life. I had a loving family, friends I could lean on. I had it all. I just wish...that I could get to Tokyo U. Then I could make those fields of butterbur that you wanted so much, Dad."

He tensed, his eyes finally burning. "Don't tell me that's the only reason that you wanted to go there!!"

She smiled. "Sorry, it was." She looked up. It was plain to see that Tadashi was suddenly enraged.

"Back to the hippie...as always..." he growled.

Her eyes steadied for a brief moment, then drifted to the ground again.

_He's...jealous of Hana..._

"So, get here quick and give Tadashi a piece of your minds, kay?" The tears were streaming down her face.

Tadashi clenched his fist. "Alright...that's enough. Kill her. Burn her to a fucking crisp."

Xue gripped the phone tightly.

"Good bye, everyone. I love you all...Very, very, VERY much!!"

They all screamed their love in reply, and she closed her eyes to take it all in. When she opened them, she saw the fire coming for her. She could already feel the heat. Ren's yells for Tadashi to stop could barely be heard over the roaring blaze. But for some reason, their last words to her put her heart at peace. She wasn't the least bit afraid of her fate.

"Hey, Hana..."

"Y-Yeah...?"

"Back then, at the hospital, I know what you were trying to say...

"I love you t--"


	87. Fate and Time Are Never Kind

School's back in session. Our first lesson is a review: Jezzy is made of update fail. Class dismissed.

It's so bad that the times when I feel like writing the most are the times when I should be either, a. paying attention in class, or b. sleeping. My mind is a cruel thing.

**Notes: Xue talks awkwardly in the first part of this chapter since she's still just a toddler :3**

**Xue makes use of the fact that Hana's name means both "nose" and "flower", just in case you don't know those words.**

**Hana acts a lot different than how I first portrayed him due to Takei giving him a "bawww mommy and daddy didn't love me enough" personality/temperament.**

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Seven: Fate and Time Are Never Kind**

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"Hey, Tamao!" HoroHoro called as he and Rong approached the Funbari Onsen.

The pink-haired woman waved to them gracefully, a large knife in her right hand. The couple looked slight worried, but remained calm as they reached the doorstep.

Rong and Tamao shook hands, it being their first meeting, and then the faux mother looked past them. "Where is your daughter?"

"Oh, she's right...Gah!" The Ainu looked around frantically for the toddler, but Rong grabbed him by the collar.

"You said you'd watch her while I carried the bags in, Aokun, and now you've _lost_ her?!"

He whipped his head from side to side, then finally spotted her. "O-Oh! There she is! Hey, Snowflake!"

Xue peeked her head out from behind a fence. She smiled, then came running up to them dragging a bokken behind her. She looked very proud of herself.

"Look what Xue found!" she cried. She tried holding the bokken up vertically, but it tipped to the side and landed on her father's foot. When he gave a small yelp of pain, she cocked her head at him. "What's wong, Daddy?"

Rong gave him a hard slap on the back. "Daddy's just fine! Aren't you, Daddy?" She gave him a menacing grin.

"Y-Yeah," he whimpered, tears in his eyes. "I'm perfectly fine, Xue."

"Those be happy tears?" the little girl asked.

"Correctamundo!" Rong cried.

"Yay! Xue got it wight!" She danced.

After watching their skit, Tamao smiled. "How old is she?"

"Dis many!" the toddler cried, holding three fingers up. "But soon, Xue will be...DIS MANY!" She held up four fingers as dramatically as she could.

"Oh how exciting! You'll be a big girl then, won't you?"

"Yeah-huh!" She beamed.

The adults smiled at her before getting down to the reason they had come in the first place.

"Are those two still not back yet?" HoroHoro asked.

Tamao looked at the ground sadly and shook her head. "No. I haven't heard from them in a while, either. I hate to have to keep lying to Hana, but really, what else can I do?"

They were silent before Rong hit her left palm with her right fist. "Those two really pi-- er, make me mad!" she said glancing down at her daughter, careful of any new vocabulary she might learn. "I mean, leaving all the time for some unknown reason! Leaving their son here...Anna had to slap me so to make me come to my senses, and I'm beginning to think I should return the favor."

The other two adults looked at her nervously, the vision of a slapping contest forming in their minds.

"Nee, Daddyyy," Xue whined pulling on her father's arm. "You said dere'd be a new fwend for Xue here!"

He bent down to her level. "Of course there is, Snowflake. I bet he's in the backyard. Why don't you go find him?"

She threw her arms up. "Wai! Hide and seek! Hide and seek! Xue likes to play hide and seeeeek!" she cried as she ran around the corner.

Tamao watched her run. "Hana...he's become quite bitter and angry over his parents. I hope they get along well."

Rong waved her off. "I wouldn't worry too much. Xue's a sweetheart. She can wiggle her way into just about anyone's heart. She even gets a smile out of Ren every now and then."

"I hope so...It'd be nice for Hana to have a friend..."

Xue skipped along the side of the house, humming to herself. She abruptly stopped when she saw a boy about three years older than her sitting near the koi pond, hugging his knees. He stared into water, watching the few fish that dwelt in it swim about.

She studied him for a few moments. _He looks so sad..._ But then she smiled brightly. She knew that her parents often went from gloomy to happy as long as she brought a bit of sunshine over. If she could brighten up their days, then she didn't see any reason why her charm wouldn't work on the boy in front of her. She giggled and ran over to him.

"Hiya!" she cried, jumping in front of him.

He flinched out of surprise, but then resumed his position. "Hi..." he grumbled.

She blinked. Her first try, and there had been next to no reaction from her target.

_Xue will twy again!_

"What's your name?" she asked leaning over him, her hands on his wrists.

He flailed to get her to let go, but she held on tight.

"What's your name?" she asked again.

"It's Hana – NOW LET GO!!"

She happily complied, then took a moment to digest the name. "Hana..." she said softly. She pointed to her nose. "Hana..."

The boy frowned.

She looked around, then picked a flower and looked it over. "Hana," she said thoughtfully, pointing at it.

He turned away from her. He hated the meanings of his name. It only showed him just how egotistical his parents were, simply meshing their names instead of picking out one with a stronger meaning.

Before he knew it, the flower was practically being stuffed up his nose. Xue was giggling innocently.

"Hana-Hana-Hana!"

He finally brushed the flower away and shoved her away before he started sneezing. The pollen had gotten up his nose, no doubt. Xue smiled and tossed the flower to the side.

"Hi, Hana! My name's Xue!" She smiled and cocked her head. "Let's be fwends, 'kay?"

"Not a chance. No way!"

She pouted her bottom lip. "Why not? Do...Do you hate Xue?"

He glowered at her. "You're annoying me. Get lost."

Xue looked at him in shock. She couldn't remember the last time someone had treated her like she was a bother. Adults, particularly the relatives in her tribe, had always seemed to enjoy her company. The boy's dismissive attitude was eating away at her resolve. Not wanting to fail at her duty, she frantically tried to come up with another plan.

"N-Ne, Hana," she said with a shaky smile, "let's go play a ga--"

The boy finally stood up, his hands clenched and his teeth grit in rage. "What, are you stupid or something?! I told you to get lost!"

"B-But Xue just wants to be fwends with Hana!"

"Well, I don't wanna be friends with a girl! You're not even cute!"

Her eyes widened, devastated. She had been told she was cute for as long as she could remember. No one had ever told her otherwise – that is, before now.

"Xue...isn't cute?" she whispered slowly.

"No! You're not cute at all! The way you talk is so annoying! And you do annoying things!"

She tried to shake it off. "B-But Daddy said Xue and Hana could be fwends! Daddy said that no one at school liked Hana and that he was lonely! Xue just wants to make Hana unlonely!"

He stared at her. _That's__ why she's here?!_ But as he took in her words, they only called to mind the teasing he had to endure everyday at school. He didn't want to be reminded that his classmates ostracized him and called him a freak. Most of all, he didn't want to be reminded of how his parents had abandoned him and run off when he was younger, and how he hadn't seen them since.

"What do _you_ know, huh?! Don't act like you know me!" he yelled.

"B-But Xue wants to make Hana unlonely!"

"SHUT UP!!"

He shoved her backward forcefully. Losing her footing, she tumbled into the koi pond. Hana watched as she flailed before grabbing the edge and slowly pulling herself out. On her hands and knees, she panted as she tried to calm herself down.

"Why did you push Xue into the water?" she asked finally.

"Because you wouldn't leave me alone."

"Me...Meanie..." she said as she stood up, sopping wet. "Xue was being weally nice to you 'cause Daddy said to, but you're just a big, fat meanie!" She looked up at him, about to cry.

Hana had resumed sitting, his legs folded. He didn't look the least bit remorseful. "Whatever. It's your own fault, dummy."

Xue shook with anger before wiping her eyes and charging at him.

"YOU MEANIE BUTT DUMB STUPID POO FACE!"

Before he could evade her, she made a shoving motion with her arms. He closed his eyes.

"BOM!"

He flinched. When no shove actually came, he opened his eyes. Her arms had extended on either side of his head above his shoulders. Despite her not even brushing against him, he fell backward anyway. Xue lowered her arms and looked down at him.

"Ne...Hana...Are you sad?"

He froze. "Whaddaya mean?"

"Do you think I painted my hair?" she asked slowly.

He sat up, mildly curious as to why she wasn't referring to herself in third person. "I dunno..."

Xue stared at the ground, then touched her two-toned hair. "I've got this hair 'cause of Daddy. It makes all the kids know that I'm diffwent. I get made fun of for it. I din't do anything wong, though. That's what Mommy said. I'm speshul. That's why Daddy calls me Snowfwake. They tell me to be happy, so I smile when they're sad...so they won't cwy. But ya know..."

She looked up at him with red, puffy eyes.

"I'm sad. I get sad when the other kids call me mean names. It's doesn't make me feel good. Evwyone's cold and pwickly instead of warm and fuzzy." She wiped her eyes, then smiled at him. "Daddy said they do the same stuff to you too. That's why he brung me here, so we could be fwends. We might fight sometimes, but I won't ever call you a mean name, Hana." She put out her pinky finger. "I pwomise."

He stared at her. Even after he had pushed her around, even into the koi pond, she wasn't mad. She was just standing there, soaking wet, smiling at him, and offering him what few children her age could – understanding.

He wanted to be treated like a person for once. Someone with feelings. He wasn't going to find that kind of acceptance at school – he understood that from an early age.

Right now, it seemed as though he was only going to get that kind of everlasting friendship from one source.

Slowly, he grasped the pinky finger with his own.

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"Well, well, look who's back! Ready for an Okaeri Kick?"

"I'll pass, thanks," Xue said with a smirk. "And aren't you a little old for that?"

"Whatever. I'm fifteen and I'll do what I want." Hana folded his arms in a bratty fashion.

She giggled, then smiled brightly. "It's nice to see you again. I'm really glad I could come."

He gave her a half smile. "Yeah..."

Xue wasn't referring to herself in third person anymore, a change that had occurred in the six months since they last met.

_Whatever. She's twelve. She shouldn't be doing that stuff anymore anyways._

He squinted, then poked at a piece of gauze taped to her left cheek. "How'd you get that?"

She froze, the smile vanishing for a moment, then beamed again. "Hehe, I fell off my bike! BAM! And I got a cut, so Mommy patched me up, and now I'm all better!"

He sighed. "You're such a klutz."

She lightly punched the side of her head and stuck her tongue out. "Hehe! That's me!"

He grinned, then looked around. "Where's Seta?"

"Over at Ren and Auntie Pin-Mei's house. He wanted to be with Lien and Ren instead."

"Humph. Brat." He glanced up at her. She was staring at him mindlessly. "Hellooo!" he said waving a hand in front of her.

She just smiled, her eyes shining. Without warning, she lunged and hugged him. "I missed you."

He stiffened. It always made him feel uncomfortable when she did this.

"Yeah...M...Me too..."

This hug was tighter than the last she had given him. It felt like it would take the Jaws of Life to pry her off of him. He was about to push her off when he felt his shirt get slightly damp. He decided to let her hold on for a little bit longer.

Later that night, after he and Xue had said good night and gone to their separate rooms, Hana walked to the kitchen for a glass of water. The voices of their parents could be heard from the TV room.

"How'd you even get Seta over to China? Doesn't he hate planes?"

"Pin-Mei brought the twins over and then they brought him back on the 'Tao Express'."

"Ah...to be rich with disposable income," HoroHoro said, leaning back.

Rong sighed. "It's good that she doesn't have to worry about money. She's already dealing with the inevitable, and I don't think she really knows what to do."

Yoh's smile became faint. "I see."

"She called me sobbing the other night, saying that little Ren had come home with a bloody nose and a black eye. She was hysterical, screaming that she didn't understand why anyone would want to hurt her baby, and that she was going to march to school and show those stupid kids what happens when someone lays a hand on a child of hers. Ren wouldn't have any of that, of course. His solution is to teach the kid to defend himself." She sighed again and massaged her temple.

It was quiet for a few moments. Yoh tried to move away from the subject.

"Xue's grown up a bit, I can tell."

The Usui couple looked at each other, then away again.

"Yeah...We were kind of surprised ourselves," HoroHoro said with a nervous smile.

"Yes," Rong said. "She's suddenly gotten more mature. We're not really sure why, but it might have to do with her school."

"How so?"

Another glance. "Hey, I was working when she came home, but you were there. You know the story best."

Rong stared into her sake, then took a deep breath.

"She came home with that bandage on her cheek, and some others on her chin and arms and such, so of course I asked her what happened. At first, she said that she crashed into those stackable vault things during gym class, but after I wore her down, she finally admitted that some kids had cornered Seta, calling him things like 'Ghost Boy', you know, the stupid ones we've all heard. Well, with Xue, her hair makes her a double target, so they started on her too when she tried to get them to lay off Seta. They beat the crap out of her basically, but she did her best to protect her brother.

"Seta...he said that Xue was hurt really badly, that she was in so much pain she was crying while those stupid kids told her...that she was a mistake..."

Hana looked into his glass of water. He and Xue had been trading stories of being harassed by their classmates since they were younger. Now, she was lying to him. She was shutting him out. She wouldn't speak of an event that could have very well caused a significant change in her.

_She's always been stupid, acting like everyone's depending on her to be happy so they can be too. Still, why the hell would she keep all this from me? Yeah, I'm older than her, but our moms were still teens when they had us, so this would have been something we could've talked about together. I just don't fucking get it!_

As he made his way back to his room, he paused and looked into Xue's, the sliding door open ajar. She was sleeping peacefully, free from the anxiety of wearing a sometimes heavy mask day after day. It was as if, even in slumber, she knew that she was safe in this place.

She let out a small, "hee", before flopping onto her stomach and hugging her pillow. With her mouth muffled, she mumbled a few things before her body relaxed again.

Carefully, he shut the slider and went to bed.

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"You're...getting kinda tall, you know that?"

"Yeah? So?" Xue puffed her cheeks.

"I dunno. Not that many guys want to be with someone who's taller than them."

"T-There are a few guys taller than me! Plus, if they like me, my height doesn't matter."

"I guess..."

They strolled down the dirt road, occasionally looking up at the cherry blossoms.

"So you're in high school now, right?"

"Yup. Are you going to college or anything like that, Hana?"

"Nah, not right now - if ever. I don't even know what I'd go for. Besides, it's more fun to just fuck around and stuff. You going to go to college?"

Her nose turned up slightly. "Yes, of course."

"'Of course!' What, do you _like_ school or something?"

"Not really. I just have goals, that's all."

"What, to make more money than the guy who marries you?" he laughed.

"Not...really..."

"Eh? Are you not planning on getting married?"

"Of course I am!"

"That was a quick response. Already got the hots for someone? Big plans for the wedding already?"

Xue lowered her head and stopped walking, allowing him to take a few steps before he noticed her absence. With a look of confusion, Hana turned to face her.

"What's up? Why'd you stop?"

She didn't reply. When he tired of the silence, he sighed and turned back around.

"Whatever. You're so weird sometimes."

Before he could take a step, she finally spoke.

"I love you!!"

He stopped, his feet rooted to the ground. He didn't turn around. He didn't reply.

"I have for a few years now," she went on. "You were the first real friend I ever made, and you're still the best and dearest one I have."

She grabbed at her heart. "I tried to stop myself and just smile, but my feelings wouldn't go away. My chest feels so tight when I'm with you, but I feel so happy at the same time." She breathed. "I know this is sudden, and I've probably caught you off-guard, but please accept my feelings, Hana. I...I really do love you."

Now it was his own chest that hurt. It was hard to reflect on her words knowing that she was staring at him intently. Despite himself, he let out a small chuckle.

"Thanks, but...don't you think it's more fun to just be friends?"

Her eyes widened. Rejection.

He scratched his head. "I mean, long distance relationships suck, really. And plus, then we'd have to be all mushy and stuff...I dunno, just seems like it'd be weird and just a drag. I mean, don't me wrong - you're kind of cute, and you're nice and not high-maintenance, but I just don't think it's a good idea. I don't really think you're what I'm looking for, sorry."

After some silence, a quivering voice met his ears.

"Y-Yeah...I guess you're right...Sorry I brought it up."

It was obvious that she was crying.

"I'm feeling a little nauseous...I think I'm going to go back to the inn and lay down for a while. S-See you...la..."

She covered her mouth, muffling the last syllable. Trying to keep it together, she turned and bolted back toward to onsen, leaving Hana standing in the shade of a cherry blossom tree. His eyes lowered slightly as her hurried footsteps faded.

"My bad."

That night at dinner, Xue was all smiles again. She gleefully passed the dishes around the table and told stories from school. But whenever she and Hana made eye contact, her smile would fade, and her eyes would dull. Fortunately, all it took was for someone to ask her to pass the rice, though, and she would perk up again.

A few days later, after an awkward handshake and promise to call the other when they had the time, Xue left with her parents. Hana waved slowly and stiffly, lowering the hand as she got further and further away.

It was then, when she gave a single backwards glance with forced happiness and eyes filled with tears that he realized something.

_...Dammit..._

* * *

_But I didn't get the chance to tell her how I felt._ _By the time I got the balls to, she got together with that Tamagotchi guy. And after he was gone, she really wasn't in any condition for me to tell her, even though I tried. And now..._

"_I love you t--"_

_I might be too late again_. He grit his teeth. "DAMMIT!!"

But before Hana got too caught up in his down feelings, he glanced to his left at Seta, who was running alongside him. He had a look of disbelief on his face. With the prospect of his sister being killed while they listened over the phone, the usually cheerful Ainu was silent. Though he had the mindset to continue running, the desperate desire to reach his sister was all he could think about.

_It was just a bad connection, right? That's why the call was dropped...Neesan couldn't really be dead...right?_

He quickly brushed an anxious tear from his eye as his legs continued carrying him as swiftly as they could.

_Nessan, please don't die!_

**

* * *

**

As the flames dispersed and disappeared, Xue's charred body stood for a few moments, then fell forward. It landed on the ground with a thump, a few ashes rising up before settling again.

Tadashi strolled over to the body and used his foot to turn her head over. Eyes closed. He bent down and touched her arm. Burnt to a crisp.

A nervous laugh escaped, but he found the ability to turn it into a menacing cackle.

"I did it...I finally did it! I got my revenge!" His voice was quivering. "See! I told you I'd kill you! Serves you right! Ahahaha...ha...ha...ha......" _She's really dead…_

"LIEN!!"

He looked to Ren, whose eyes were, for once, wide with concern. "What's eating you?"

"Tadashi, you fool!"

He whipped around to see Suo glaring at him, panic visible on her face. She used her closed fan to point to the prayer circle.

"The sacrifice!"

He looked past her. Lien had collapsed within the circle, interrupting the chant and setting it back. Frantic, he stumbled to his feet and bolted over to her. He picked her up and turned her over in his lap, checking for a pulse. Her shallow breathing told him she wasn't dead, but if she couldn't stay conscious long enough to complete the ritual, he was going to have to stabilize her. He eyed the Ace bandage that bound her chest.

"What the hell...? Was this all part of that stupid twin attack they tried to pull? Dammit..."

"She collapsed because the binding made it too hard for her to breathe," Ren called over.

"What?" Tadashi looked up at him. "So now what, smart ass?!"

"You'll... have to rip it off," the heir answered, each word painful. "She won't be able to breathe otherwise." He fell silent, his head drooping into the mud in shame for suggesting that his precious sister's body be exposed to a fiend like him.

"Rip it off...?" Tadashi whispered, knowing the feast his eyes were going to have.

"But I'm warning you..." Ren's voice came with demonic aura. "If you touch her, I don't care if I have to burn my wrists off, I WILL come over there and kill you, Tadashi."

He would have laughed off this threat like all the others if the look in Ren's eyes hadn't truly terrified him. "Y-Yeah...'course..." He found the strip of bandage that was folded under a few layers and loosened it. With a strong pull, the bindings fell to her waist.

Lien gasped a few times, collapsing against him. After a minute or so, she gingerly gripped the cuffs of his blazer.

"Tadashi-kun..."

He stiffened slightly. "H-Hey there, Princess," he said finally. "Feeling better?"

She simply mewed and laid her head on his chest. "Tadashi-kun..." Lien was topless, but she didn't seem to notice, a near impossible feat considering the cool weather brought on by the rain.

Ren watched his sister cling to the man who was no doubt going to be responsible for any disaster that befell her. Part of him wished he had just accepted her feelings so they could have gone back home and sorted it out later.

_That bastard doesn't even deserve to hold her like that._

"What the hell did you do with her shirt, Ren?" Tadashi called to him.

Ren glared back, not appreciating the puppet's attitude. "In the bushes, along with her brassiere."

"Fucking annoying..." Tadashi mumbled. He removed his blazer and put it on her, buttoning it just enough to cover her chest. "Go find your shirt, Lien, and do it fast. We don't have time for this bullshit."

The doll gave him a sweet smile. "Okay." She daintily stood and walked past her brother toward their former hiding place. He didn't bother trying to say anything to her. He knew that he presently didn't exist in her mind.

Tadashi watched her, heaving a heavy sigh when she was out of sight. He shook his head, then half covered it with his right hand.

"What's wrong, Meihou?" Ren taunted. "Tired of your own game? Is her behavior finally getting to you? Could you possibly be, oh I don't know, feeling guilty?"

The fiend glared at him nervously and turned away slightly. "Of course not! That bitch deserved to die!"

"So it's you, you bastard!"

Tadashi spun to see Hana and Seta standing near the burnt body. Seta darted to it and fell to his knees. He reached out to touch her, but couldn't find it in him to do so. She didn't even look like herself. She was near unrecognizable.

"Neesan..." he whispered. "Oi...Neesan..." He finally put his hand on her cheek. "It's warm...so that means you aren't dead, right? You wouldn't let some ghost kill you, right?" He paused, as if waiting for her to chime in with an, 'Of course not, silly!' But she didn't. She no longer had the ability to.

Her brother's hand left her, then clenched into a fist as tears flooded his eyes.

"Neesan...Why..." He looked up at Tadashi. "Tadashi-senpai, were you the one who killed her? WHY?! If you're really back from the dead, shouldn't you and Neesan be making up so you can go back to Japan and be happily together again?! Why would you KILL her?! WHY?!"

Tadashi gave him an uneasy look and took another step back. _Dammit...Seta never did anything but try to help me after Xue left. How can I even--?_

"Tadashi-kun!"

Lien seemingly appeared out of nowhere, now dressed, and carried his blazer over to him. He gingerly took it from her.

"Th-Thanks, Princess." She responded by throwing her arms around him and cooing his name.

Seta sat and stared at them, both horrified and dumbfounded. "L-Lien..." He almost seemed to be reaching out to take her, not wanting to entertain the notion that her love belonged to someone else.

"He came to us as a second-year transfer student," Ren said finally. "That person who I told you was trying to win Lien's affections was him. But it's not what it looks like – Lien doesn't love him. He's just manipulating her like the sick and twisted bastard he is."

Seta stared at the ground, trying to take in all these new developments. His only sister was dead. His senpai, whom he had looked up to, admired, and sought advice from was the one who killed her, and the girl he loved was hanging on him as if she couldn't possibly be more smitten. Inside, the world he knew was falling apart. He grabbed at his hair.

"I don't understand what's going on! Why did you kill Neesan?! Why are you taking away the one person I've ever had strong feelings for?!" he yelled.

Ren's eyes shifted to the ground before closing. His friend's wails were almost too much to bear. As cruel as the thought was, he was glad that he couldn't see him from where he was tied down.

Hana, who had been staring at Xue's lifeless body the whole time, bowed his head. "Are you going to answer him, you fucking murderer?" he growled.

Tadashi remained silent, but began slowly inching Lien back to her prayer circle.

"WELL?!"

He flinched, then quickly forced the girl to her knees. With one quick pat on the head, she was back to chanting.

Hana stood up. "What's the matter, Tadashi? Not going to try to bullshit your way out of this? Not going to tell us how slutty Xue was, and that she cheated on you, and that it's _her_ fault you killed yourself in the first place? HUH?!"

Tadashi clenched his fists. "That's right! All of this is her fault! If she hadn't left me for you, then I wouldn't have killed myself!"

The Asakura gave an angry grin. "You're full of it. Xue and I were NEVER together, no thanks to you. Do you really believe all that crap? Or are you just saying what you think I'm expecting to hear?"

"I don't need to make anything up! I think it's clear to everyone that she's the one who messed everything up! She went crazy after I died because of how guilty she felt! She KNEW it was all her fault!"

"Xue went crazy because you decided to be a cowardly, selfish dipshit and kill yourself!" Hana yelled.

Tadashi flinched.

"I'm not badmouthing people who commit suicide because they have depression, or people who really felt that they were alone, and there really, truly wasn't anyone who could possibly be there for them." His arm whipped out and pointed at him threateningly. "But you...you still had people! Xue still worried about you! She mentioned how worried she was several times! But she was still confused and didn't feel like she could be with you again at that time! And Seta--!"

The redheaded boy looked up, his anguished eyes meeting his senpai's muddled ones.

"HoroHoro said that Seta went to your house almost every day after school to see you and talk to you, but you wouldn't even come to the goddamn door! And I _know_ you must have had another group of friends! You had plenty of people reaching out to you, but you chose to ignore all of them! Instead, you put them through HELL by killing yourself to get back at Xue for breaking up with you!"

He panted, then lowered both his arm and his head. "Damn you...you bastard...It wasn't enough for you to hurt Xue like you did. You, for whatever shitty reason you have, just HAD to kill her." His fist tightened as his eyes burned. "Dammit...Dammit...If only we'd gotten here sooner! DAMN IT ALL!"

The men were silent. Tadashi watched Seta clutch his sister's corpse tightly and grieve.

_Was...Was all of this a big mistake? Was taking revenge on her wrong? I mean...I shouldn't be in pain anymore, she's dead and gone. She's..._

"Dead..." he whispered.

Ren silently contemplated if he should try to make Hana carry out his objective of stopping the ritual and saving Lien. Unlike his father, Hana was very headstrong. If he didn't like the plan, there was little chance that he would help out. He knew that on a personal front, Hana had never concerned himself with Lien, mostly due to their difference in ages. It wasn't so much that Hana wouldn't care if she died or not, but with Xue's death fresh in his mind, she arguably wouldn't be his biggest concern.

Seta was completely out of the question. The boy hated fighting in the first place, and although having Lien on the line would make him abandon his pacifism, it would be unthinkably cruel to ask for his assistance. He needed this time to mourn.

_So Hana it is, then._

He turned his head as much as he could so he could be heard. "Hana."

"What," came a brisk, curt reply.

"Tadashi's planning to bring Hao back with that ritual that he's forcing Lien to perform. She's also the sacrifice. I need you to get her out of there for me. If you don't, only the GS knows what will happen if the ritual succeeds."

Hana listened to the Tao heir's plea in silence. Ren tensed as he waited, hoping that he would hear the words he so desperately needed to momentarily ease his mind. Seta had looked up at the mention of Lien, and was now staring at her in horror. He looked at Hana, not knowing what he could do if he refused.

Hana looked up slightly. "Alright. I'll save her. I'm not going to let anyone else die because of this asshole."

Ren breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"Yeah, I'll save her – after I'm done with this son of a bitch."

His eyes widened. "No, Hana! Wait! Don't take him head on! He has the Spirit of Fire!"

Hana didn't look concerned. "Whatever. We're not going to use spirits anyway. I'd rather beat the shit out of him with my fists."

"And you think he's going to just sit there and not use the Spirit of Fire?!"

"If he's a man and not a coward, then yeah. I mean, look at him." He gestured to Tadashi. "He's a space cadet right now. I think he's starting to realize what he did, so it'll be easy to knock him out."

Ren grit his teeth. This was what he had been afraid of – Hana's focus being to avenge Xue, rather than seeing if he stopped the ritual, he could use Tadashi as a punching bag for all eternity afterward.

_Father, where are you? If you were here, this whole thing would be over!_

He was nearly splashed with mud as Hana ran by him, his fist ready to land the first blow. Despite himself, Ren almost felt sorry for Tadashi as Hana give him a strong right hook – the guy never saw it coming. He was launched into the air, landing face-down in the mud.

"Come on! Get up! I'm not done with you yet!"

Tadashi slowly got to his feet, his legs shaky. Just as he turned to face his attacker, Hana tackled him. He used one hand to force the demon's shoulder into the ground, and used the other to mercilessly assault him. Tadashi finally threw him off and quickly got up, hoping it would prevent him from being helplessly pinned to the ground again. Unfortunately, this didn't stop Hana from charging and kicking him in the stomach. In the mud again.

Tadashi coughed, blood dripping from his mouth onto his hands as he supported himself. _Dammit...This kills. Why isn't the pain going away? Why aren't I healing? DAMMIT!_

Suo noticed this as well. _Hao-sama must be taking back his energy for when he arrives, which would explain why Tadashi's power is weakening. This must mean that the ritual is nearly complete._ She glanced at Lien, a wicked, sadistic smile on her face. _I can't wait to see the looks on their faces when they realize that their only precious daughter is gone forever. It will most certainly be worth waiting for._

Ren saw her grin. He could only assume the worst.

"Hana! Hurry up! You're running out of time!"

"Don't worry, I'm almost done." Hana yanked Tadashi up by the collar. "So, are you sorry yet? Do you regret killing her yet?"

The killer was nearly in tears. "I-I didn't think she'd actually die! I thought she was stronger than that!"

Hana paused, then slammed his prey to the ground in rage. "YOU DIDN'T THINK SHE'D DIE?!" he yelled. "Over 2000 degrees of fire, and you thought she'd just bounce back?! Are you fucking serious?!"

Tadashi didn't reply, simply turning his head away as blood dripped down his face. After spitting on the ground near him, Hana walked over to Seta's carry-on bag. He silently removed some tied up packaging from it and untied it, revealing the antiquity he had stealthily borrowed from his father. He stood again.

"I wasn't going to fight you like this, but you've really pissed me off." He turned, his eyes like daggers. "I think you're the one who should die in a fire."

Hana called for Amidamaru, who instantly appeared.

"Xue's dead because of this son of a bitch," he murmured. "We're taking him down."

Amidamaru looked as though he was going to make a slight protest, most likely against the notion of killing again, but his master oversouled him before he had the chance to speak.

Tadashi's eyes quivered as he looked at the large glow from the oversoul. Then he remembered that he wasn't defenseless. "S-Spirit of Fire!"

Nothing happened. He looked dumbfounded.

"SPIRIT OF FIRE!"

Again, the spirit failed to appear. He finally looked at Hana, who was wearing a slightly interested grin.

"What's the matter Tadashi? Not as confident without Hao's power as your crutch?"

Meihou shrank away from him._ Hao-sama's power really is leaving me_, he thought. He opened his palm. A small fire flickered. _I barely have anything left! Why is he abandoning me at a time like this?!_

"I think now you're beginning to understand Hao's true nature," Hana said. "Don't you get it? He never cared about you. If he did, he'd give you the SoF one last time so you could blow me and Seta away. Looks like you're on your own."

With that, he charged, Spirit of Sword raised. He brought it down at Tadashi, who barely stumbled away. He crashed into the ground, but quickly rose and spied his prey. Tadashi flinched as Hana rushed at him again, ready to unleash a more agile attack.

He slashed once, hitting Tadashi's arm. Tadashi miss-stepped and slid in the mud, causing him to fall backwards.

Ren was getting agitated and impatient. "HANA. JUST SAVE LIEN. WE KNOW THAT TADASHI ISN'T A THREAT ANYMORE, SO JUST IGNORE HIM FOR NOW."

Hana scowled back at him. "How can you say that when I'm just one or two shots away from killing him? Give me a few more minutes."

The heir's body shook in rage, wishing he could walk over and beat the crap out of him. He couldn't even bang his fists on the ground to get the feelings out. "FUCKING--- WE DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER WE HAVE UNTIL LIEN'S DONE."

"Just hold on. One Buddha-giri should do it." He looked forward again to see that Tadashi had stumbled over to the edge of the forest. "O-ho! Looks like someone's trying to run away."

Tadashi whirled around to face him, but fell back against the tree he had been clinging to for support. A wave of furyoku rushed at him, splitting in two and hitting him on both sides. The attack and the pain that came with it left him wondering how his arms were still attached as he slumped to the ground.

Blood was pouring out of him. The metallic taste inside his mouth was nauseating, almost like a sadistic way of giving him an idea of how close he was to dying. His breathing came in deep gasps, the terror of the situation finally overwhelming him. He had been expecting Hao to be the one to kill him, not this hippie.

_I can't die! Hao-sama needs my body so he can be brought back! I can't let this guy kill me!_

He looked up at Hana, who was getting ready to unleash one last attack, one that he was expecting to tear him apart and dissolve every part of him. Once again, he was going to disappear. Not wanting to look, he shut his eyes and grit his teeth. His right hand shifted - he felt a cold metal beside him.

Ren's Kwan Dao.

Hana was already rushing at him. There was no time to think. He took the weapon into his aching hands.

_I don't want to die!_

Hana didn't seem to notice any of this. He was too preoccupied with the thought of killing the person who had taken away his best friend.

"Go to hell, you bastard!!"

"IIYAAAHH!"

"Hana-dono! Look out!!"

But it was too late for him to stop. Before he even knew what had happened, he'd run right into the blade, effectively impaling himself through the chest.

Tadashi was still shaking as Hana stared at him in disbelief. He thought he had won. He thought that his revenge, in the name of the girl he cared for most, would be carried out and satisfy him. He had been all too close to realizing it. The Asakura heir sneered as he dropped his weapon, the oversoul dissolving.

"Hana-dono!" Amidamaru cried. But in the end, he didn't know what to say aside from a string of apologies for his "weakness".

"No…It's okay, Amidamaru. I wasn't paying enough attention," Hana said in as little breath as possible. "Just…go tell my parents, alright?"

"I refuse! I cannot possibly leave my master at such a time!" his partner yelled.

"Do it. I'm ordering you."

"Pardon my insolence, but I must still refuse!"

Hana finally gave up, knowing that Amidamaru's loyalty would never be overcome. His eyes shifted toward the sky.

_Yeah, that's right, Dad. Who knows when you'll find out now. Who cares? You probably don't._

His vision was going blurry.

_You were never there when I needed you anyway. Neither of you were._

In his mind he thought of Yoh patting his five year-old son on the head before he and Anna took a bag and walked out the door, leaving him behind. When the kids made fun of him, Tamao was the one he cried to. His parents weren't there. Even when they came back, they would just leave again a short time later. Any happiness he had felt at that time would be short-lived, and he would be alone again.

_Xue..._

He looked at Tadashi, who shivered and let out a small whimper. "Heh...I guess once you've killed one person, it's easy to kill another, you murderer."

"N-No! I didn't want to! I just didn't know what else to do!"

"I'll...make sure a special place in hell is reserved just for you...don't you worry." He closed his eyes. "At least...I'm the one who gets to be with Xue in the end...I win…"

His smirk faded, and his body went limp. The Kwan Dao was the only support holding him up. Horrified, Tadashi dropped the murder weapon, sending the corpse to the ground. He watched the body hoping for movement. There was none.

_I-I didn't mean to kill him! I just wanted to fend him off so he didn't do the same to me! I didn't mean to!_

"Why...?"

His eyes shifted to Seta. Aside from Ren, who was of course unable to fight whilst pinned to the ground, he was the only one left who could stand in the way of the ritual succeeding. Seta, from the look in his eyes, was aware of the position he was in. Unless of the adults showed up, it would be entirely up to him to save everyone.

"I don't want this..." he whispered, holding his sister even tighter. "I don't want any of this!" He looked to his senpai desperately. "T-Tadashi-senpai! Please make it all stop! Don't kill anyone else! Please!!" He squeezed his eyes shut. "Especially not Ren and Lien...especially not Lien...They're the only real friends I have!"

Tadashi couldn't rationalize the situation to him. He couldn't lie like he had before.

_Dammit...why did he have to come?! I didn't mean for him to get involved! It was just about Xue and that hippie!_

"You seem to be losing your resolve, Tada-darling. How disappointing."

He looked up to see Suo standing next to him, her eyes locking on the Ainu like crosshairs.

"K-Kaasan, I..."

She scoffed at him. "Hao-sama was kind enough to give you the opportunity to exact revenge on those who scorned and abandoned you. And now, on the eve of his return, you are regretting his blessing?"

Tadashi jumped up. "No! Not at all! It's just – just that I don't want anyone else to die when they never did anything to me! Seta's innocent! I can't kill him just because he's in the wrong place at the wrong time!!"

"Of course you can," she replied nonchalantly. "You have already killed two – no, make that three, hm, four if you want to take credit for the sacrifice – what's one more?"

He just stared at her. "But...Kaasan, he's-!"

Her eyes flared as she pushed him out of the way. "If you are going to become a sniveling crybaby then make yourself useful and watch the sacrifice." She smiled at her prey. "I will take care of Rong's precious son."

Seta tensed. He wasn't being given the choice to watch or fight anymore. His emotions were understandably conflicted. How could someone in his state of mind find it in him to fight – especially with his life on the line? But all the same, he went over to his knapsack and took out a wooden cylinder. He clutched it before hesitantly turning back to meet his fate. He had brought the weapon in an effort to impress Lien by showing her some moves he had learned, but it was beginning to look as though that chance would never come.

"Silly boy," Suo said with a cackle. "Something like that won't help you against me. I would suggest a long-range weapon if you want a fraction of a chance at survival." She pulled the fan back.

"Leave him alone, Suo," Ren said in a commanding tone. "Any score you want to settle will be with my family. Leave him out of this. If you don't heed my warning, I promise you that when my father arrives--"

"Oh, won't you be quiet about your father?" she said, turning to him angrily. "It really is quite tiresome to have to listen to you gush about him over and over as if he were a saint. It's like you've forgotten the way he treated you this week. You probably want to, and I could not possibly blame you after how utterly abusive your "loving" father was." She sneered. "I know that your father thinks nothing of you now. If he comes at all, it will be only for the sake of your sister. Furthermore, Pin-Mei is not here, so I would not be able to watch the horror on her face as she watched you suffer and die. Most importantly, Hao-sama forbade me to kill either of the Tao twins." She sighed wistfully. "I couldn't get him to reconsider, either." Her eyes narrowed.

"You know nothing. I have every right to kill this eyesore. He is, after all, Wei Rong's son, is he not? That alone is reason enough." She used the fan to cover the angry wrinkles on her face. "Her constant doting on Pin-Mei...yes, that maternal behavior she exhibited every chance she got...the way she would shield her from my beatings until she was bruised..." She clenched the handle. "Her ignorance of my wishes during the Shaman Fight – making all the decisions herself and disobeying me...This whelp deserves to suffer!"

Seta watched her pull the fan back, and then swing it at him. Tags flew from it, various illnesses and physical afflictions written on them. He slid a panel, and the cylinder expanded into a bo staff.

All the same, sweat was pouring down his face. _But how do I block all of them?!_ He shut his eyes tight. _Mom! Dad!_

Just as they were about to hit him, the tags were encased in ice. They fell to the ground, most breaking as they landed.

"If you have something to take up with me, Suo, I'd rather you speak to me directly instead of dragging my children into it."

"And if it involves Rong, as her wonderful, loving, sexy, and just plain awesome husband, I'll be there to support her."

Seta whirled around to see his parents coming out of the shadows of the woods. He stared at them, wondering if he was dreaming. Were they really here?

There was a chirp. The small koropokkuru appeared, a determined look on her face.

"Yes, Kiro. Thank you for leading us here," Rong said with the faintest of smiles.

HoroHoro turned to their son. "Sorry we sent you and Hana here by yourselves. If we had known any of this was going to happen..."

But at that moment, Seta didn't care. Tears already streaming down his face, he ran to them and landed in his mother's arms like a child. It had all been too much for him, but he knew that now he could relax; his parents, the strongest people he knew, were going to save the day

Rong squeezed him tightly, her own eyes beginning to burn, as HoroHoro got his own embrace soon after. The moment of happiness was short-lived.

Rong stared at the blackened body a few meters away. HoroHoro glanced at her, knowing exactly what she was seeing without even looking himself. Both parents stared in silence. Rong finally ran to her daughter and looked at her more closely. She fell to her knees as she realized that there was no possibility that she was still alive. She held the body gently and sobbed into the shoulder, the nauseating smell of burning flesh apparent.

Her anguished scream was what finally brought her husband to her side. He knelt down next to her and grazed a hand over Xue's face. It was rough, nothing like the soft skin he was used to. A great deal of her hair had been burned away. Her arm warmers were gone.

Rong's eyes were wide in disbelief. Her body twitched with every choke that came with her tears. Battling his own sorrow, he barely had the emotional strength to hug her, but he managed to all the same. As Seta joined them, Rong turned disjointedly to her husband.

"Horokeu...Xue...She's..."

"Yeah...I know..." he cut in, not wanting to hear the last word. His voice was airy, as if he was already exhausted. He closed his eyes.

"But Xue...she brought us together," Rong continued. "We...We suffered through so much to give birth to her and give her the best life we could..."

The tears came harder as she remembered being nineteen; holding up the test that told her Xue was on the way. She remembered how terrified she had been standing on the snowy mountain, about to break the news to her lover. The relief she had felt when he didn't push her away. The pain of her family disowning her...but the immeasurable joy she had felt when the nurses handed Xue to her for the first time – made even more wonderful by the first time Xue had opened her eyes and given her a gummy smile.

"All of...that...Why? Why couldn't her life have been easier? Why did she have to be alone when she died?! WHY?!"

HoroHoro held her tighter, Xue's body falling to her mother's lap. "I don't know, Rong, I don't know. But what I do know is that I have absolutely no regrets as a father. We did the best we could with what little we had. For the most part, I think Xue live a happy life, one with few regrets of her own. For as much as that's worth, I don't think we failed as parents."

She nodded as she pulled Seta into the circle where she and her husband hugged him.

Suo watched them, an entertained gleam in her eyes. "I must say, you did this beautifully, Tada-Darling. They really are just too precious for words."

Tadashi had been examining the scene as well, but with horror and guilt in mind. He hadn't given much thought to their reactions, but now he saw just how devastated two loving parents could be.

_...What the hell have I done?_

She shifted and fanned herself. "You're not regretting your revenge are you, Tada-darling? I'm sure Hao-sama would be most upset if he knew."

Before he could reply, Rong was on her feet. "So, is that how you came back?" she asked in a dark whisper. "You made a deal with the likes of him just so you could have your petty revenge, when you could have just come to Xue when she called you in the first place and settled things with words instead of killing her?" She silently produced a chained whip from her pocket. "I hope you won't mind if I have a little revenge of my own. You've taken away one of the lights of my family, and for that, I'm going to give you such a beating that you'll be begging for the gentle hell that awaits you."

But before she could run blindly into battle, HoroHoro grabbed her wrist and held her in place. "Rong, stop." He sighed. "Believe me, I want to give this ungrateful son of a bitch a piece of my mind, too, but we can't just rush in like a couple of wild boars. If we want to avenge Xue, we have to do it right."

Her body trembled, and she cradled her elbows. "Yeah...I know...Thanks…"

Suo cackled. "Once again, Rong, your hot-headedness almost got you into trouble. What a pitiful person you are!"

"I'll have my revenge, don't doubt that for a second." She looked up. "But I now realize that you have my best friend's precious children over there, and I'd like to concentrate on keeping them alive." She hugged her arms tighter. "I'll die before I let Pin-Mei and Ren feel the pain Horokeu and I are feeling right now. We couldn't save Xue...but we won't fail again."

"'Fail again'? HA! You have failed twice before even arriving!" They looked at her, perplexed. She chortled. "You are only proving me correct, you fools. You have even failed to notice the corpse of that Asakura boy over there."

Rong and HoroHoro snapped their heads around, spying Hana lying on the ground. HoroHoro ran to him and turned him over. His eyes were closed, and his body was cold. Knowing it was futile, he checked for a pulse anyway. Nothing.

He clenched his fist, then slammed it against the ground. "DAMN!!"

"Hana..." she whispered.

Ren grit his teeth, feeling the guilt of knowing that it was his weapon that killed an otherwise innocent party. He cursed his own helplessness. _Dammit...Father where are you?!_

Something caught his eye. His shackles were steadily fading. _It must be because Tadashi's power has weakened so much._.._The timing is impeccable._ When they were gone, he quickly stood.

Suo saw this and pulled out a tag she had prepared and slammed it against his forehead. It glowed, then Ren's body flashed like millions of volts of electricity had just surged through him. When he wobbled, she closed her fan and used it to club him in such a way that he landed near his sister in her circle.

"We're not done with you yet. Just wait there patiently." She turned back to the Usui family. "Come now. You don't have much time."

They were still trying to come up with a plan. "Damn. I'm not good with this time limit thing," HoroHoro said with a nervous grin.

"We just need to make use of what we have," Rong said. She looked back at Seta. "You can just stay back there. We'll take care of this. It'll be over soon."

The boy nodded. "O-Okay, Mom."

"Alright."

The couple turned to each other.

"You ready, Aokun? Once more, with feeling?"

"For old times' sake?"

"Exactly."

"Of course." He sighed. "This brings back memories of working with a certain macho chick."

"Heh, I'll let that slide – this time."

"Let's do this."

"Just try to keep up, old man."

"That's funny coming from someone older than me."

"Details, details." She took out the whip again and let it loose. She bowed her head.

"For Xue."

He smiled faintly. "Yeah, for Xu--"

"I now call to you and urge you to haste

Please come with your power and cleanse this place..."

Lien was now standing, eyes still empty, her hands folded in prayer.

"Fuck it all...We're too late!" Rong cried biting her thumb.

HoroHoro looked around frantically. "Does this mean that Hao's on his way back?! Dammit Rong, we won't stand a chance on our own like this - even with the Spirit of Rain!"

She looked at him dumbly. "But it's the two of us together, I don't see why we should worry that much..."

"YOU IDIOT!!" he yelled, causing her to flinch. "You have no idea how strong Hao is! You weren't there when we fought him at the Shaman Fight! You were back with Pin-Mei in China so you have no idea just how hard that battle was for all of us! Unless Ren gets here, we won't stand a fucking chance!"

Rong glanced at the ground with a muddled expression, not knowing what to say. She closed her eyes. _Xue...we won't let your sacrifice be in vain. I promise. We'll find some way around this!_

Tadashi watched as flames encircled Lien. They glowed and began to consume her. Different streams of furyoku swirled, clashed, and crashed around her, making visible flashes and sparks.

"In return I offer my pure soul

Take both it and my body, swallow them whole

"I offer this vessel to house my master.

Take it as a gift from this humble caster.

I give all to you..."

Seta stood and ran at her. "Lien! Stop it!" His parents weren't able to stop him from crashing into the storm of furyoku that surrounded her. The surges captured him temporarily, then spat him back out, sending him flying back to his parents.

They ran and helped him up, but his eyes never left Lien. Nothing could ease the worry and dread he so rightfully felt.

"Lien...What are you doing? What's going to happen to you? You're...You're not going to die and leave me too, are you?"

A small smile formed on the doll's face.

"Lead us to your Utopian land

Free us from the hatred of humans

Come give us your blessing, o Sovereign!"

She reached out, as if asking for a loving embrace.

"Hao-sama!"

Her body, amongst the flames, instantly went cold.


	88. She's Got Stars in Her Eyes

After this chapter, there may not be an update for a small while. Meaning, I won't be immediately starting the next chapter with as much vigor as I usually do. School usually isn't a factor for me, but this semester, I took a class I really didn't even need to take, and I'm not doing so hot in it, so I'll need to concentrate on that. If anyone knows college algebra, let me know :'D

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Eight: She's Got Stars in Her Eyes**

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In a cold sweat, Pin-Mei began tossing clothes out of the closet.

_Where is it? I can't go out there dressed like this!_

She gripped the handle of the large door as she felt her legs begin to give out. Her body was still tired. She had hardly woken up of her own accord. An image of her family being slaughtered had come to her, and she couldn't possibly sleep anymore. It had been too early for her to be moving about, however, and her body wasn't shy about letting her know. Her legs buckled and she fell like a sack of rice. Two strong arms linked hers and gently pulled her back up again.

"My Lady," Li said calmly. "Lord Ren told me to make sure nothing happened to you. As such, I must discourage you from going out to join him in your current condition. Your strength has not been fully restored, and you are far too unstable physically."

"I don't care!" Pin-Mei yelled. She breathed deeply a few times before continuing. "I felt the furyoku of someone who should have been dead and gone a long time ago, Li. I can't allow Ren and my children to fight a battle that should have been mine and mine alone from the very beginning!"

"My apologies, My Lady, but I must reject this course of action." She grasped her mistress's shoulders. "Now please, return to your bed. I'm sure that when you wake up, Lord Ren and your children will all be back safe and sound."

"…Li, you must have felt that there are more people there than just my family. Please don't ignore it." She bowed her head, her arms shaking. "Rong's there, even after I acted like a spoiled, insufferable brat towards her, she's come to my aid just as she always has. Don't you want to help her, Li? I know that you still love and admire her very much, even after all these years. Your father may have disowned her from the family, but did you? Does she really mean nothing to you now? You no longer share your last name, but isn't she still your sister?"

Li didn't reply. All these years, she had tried to forget about the sister who allegedly shamed their family. She took Sheng away whenever Rong and her family were due for a visit, as per her brother's orders. To all of her nieces of nephews, Rong was dead. Gone. She had died with honor at the side of her master, protecting her with all she had. Li remembered being surprised when she learned of the lie she would have to tell Sheng and force her to believe, but she could do nothing to stand against her brother once he took the Wei family reins.

They could erase her sister from the records past February of 2002, but they could never erase the months that same sister spent training her to be an honorable guard just as she herself was. Li had mimicked her as often as she could, even going so far as to having a similar haircut. At the time, she had been honored to take her sister's place as Pin-Mei's guard. But once she found out just why her sister was suddenly leaving, as well as tossing the title of Captain of the Guards to her, she couldn't help but feel angry. She felt deceived. Tricked. Her sister had set her up so she could run off and have a family, something she knew she would most likely never have. The only solution was to throw her out as well; to become cold. She ignored Rong whenever she came. She wouldn't acknowledge her if she asked Li to get a plate or a glass for her, not even for a pillow. A slivering part of her reveled in the pain she could see on her sister's face. She had abandoned her, forcing her to shoulder the responsibilities that came with her position. She didn't see any way for her to see eye-to-eye with her. The circumstances of her situation meant nothing. When her father would fly into a rage about the incident and shout that Rong should have simply chosen an abortion, she agreed. That child, that bastard, half-breed child, was the enemy. It had stolen the person she loved most from her. She hated the unborn baby with a flaming and undying passion. Since the baby was still unborn, the only way she had of coping with it was to take it out on her sister. It had seemed like the correct, logical, and just thing to do. That is, until she saw her niece for the first time.

Once she saw the reason why her sister had left, the true, flesh-and-blood reason that would make her sister leave the duty she had treasured for so long, a small part of her wall fell apart. When the little girl was old enough to waddle over her and call her "Auntie", part of her heart melted. She still treated her sister's new family as coldly as ever, but she slowly felt her hatred dissipating. Thinking about it now, she didn't feel any hatred for her. But for Sheng's sake, and partially in fear of what her brother might do if he learned Li was responsible for Sheng meeting a not-so-dead Rong, she kept her distance. It had been years since she had last laid eyes on her.

Now she had the chance to do something, no longer fearing retribution from her brother. Pin-Mei, if not Ren, would make sure that didn't happen, wouldn't they?

_I don't even care. This is the one time I've been needed since I came here. I don't care anymore. I just want…_

It had been silent as Li thought. Now, she slowly released her master, careful that she was able to stand on her own. She went around her and looked into the closet.

"What does this outfit you're searching for look like?"

Pin-Mei smiled. "It's purple. It looks similar to the attire I wore when I returned here with Rong, Ling, and Shu."

"Ah…That one." She snapped her arm out like a preying mantis, snatching a hanger from the closet and showing it to her. "This one, My Lady?"

Pin-Mei nodded, still smiling. "That's the one."

After she had changed, Pin-Mei carefully opened the slim box where her fans were kept. Her eyes widened at the contents. She dropped the lid in disbelief.

"Th-They aren't here!" She put her hands on her cheeks as she tried to break the situation down and make sense of it all. "I was still hoping that this was just a mistake on my part, that I had confused her with someone else. After all, Ren always said that sensing furyoku wasn't my strong point. But unless Lien took them, that means..." Her hands became fists and she shut her eyes. "What if something happens to any of them? It'll be all my fault!"

"My Lady," Li said calmly, putting a hand on her shoulder. "From what I have heard, you and Lord Ren did all you could to kill that woman and seal her away to pay for her crimes in the depths of hell. If someone has broken that seal, it is of no fault of yours."

"Li..."

The guard stood. "But if you truly wish to make a difference, we must hurry. Without a pinpointed location, we could be wandering around for some time."

Pin-Mei nodded. "Yes, you're right. Thank you, Li." She went over to a rack of swords and took a DaDao from it. "It's no Minbouken, but it'll have to do." She took a deck of tags from her night stand. She looked back at her maidservant. "In case I need them."

Lie crossed her right hand to her heart and bowed slightly. "So wise to prepare yourself, My Lady. So very wise."

Her mistress smiled bashfully and they then made their way down the stairs to the main hall. Just as they were about to go down the last flight of stairs to the front door, the echo of uneven footsteps reached their ears.

Li quickly turned, drawing a chakram from her side pouch and readying it. "My Lady, if it is an enemy, please go on ahead to your family. That's what's most important now."

Reluctantly, she nodded. The footsteps came closer. The two tensed. A figure timidly came into the light.

"Um...excuse me...What's going on here?"

Li immediately dropped her guard. Pin-Mei crossed in front of her, looking at the girl quizzically. She gave a nervous laugh.

"I could ask the same thing...Are you lost?"

Ai-Li's eyes welled up with tears as she glomped the woman. "Finally! Someone who isn't cold-hearted and who cares about me! Thank goodness!"

Pin-Mei blinked, bewildered. "Miss..."

The student practically dropped her. "Ah, um, yes, sorry," she said, readjusting her glasses. "You see, I've been wandering around here for quite some time since that man let me in. He told me not to leave, but I can't stay out late on a school night. My parents won't be too happy about this."

The woman tilted her head. "Man...?"

"You know, the blue-haired one. The...cold one..." She looked upset again. "I just came over to deliver Ren and Lien's schoolwork, but he pulled me inside and told me I couldn't leave! I didn't think I'd get captured when I was doing the school a favor! I'm not even going to go into how hard it was to find this place..."

Pin-Mei smiled faintly. _Ren...Even during all this, you found the kindness to take care of this girl. You just continue to amaze me._

"He's right, though," she told the human. "I'm heading out to join him, but it would be in your best interest to stay here. It's very dangerous. You..." She looked away, not wanting to imagine her friends and family in this way. "...could die..."

Ai-Li just pouted. She'd had enough of being kept in the dark. How crazy were these people to tell her that she had to stay in their weird home while they left for the night, saying she could get killed if she went out? No one had even tried to explain any of this to her.

"Can someone PLEASE tell me what's going on here, for real?!" she shouted. "I-I mean, give me one good reason why I should listen to any of you! Why can't I just go home and do my homework? I have three exams tomorrow! I can't just sit around here like this!"

Li and Pin-Mei looked at each other, trying to decide if they should even attempt to explain the situation to the girl. The maidservant finally stepped forward.

"Miss, do you believe in ghosts?"

Ai-Li made a weirded out face. "N-No, of course not. There's no scientific evidence for it. No one can see them, and those photos people pass around are just Photoshopped. It's all just bad rumors. They can't possibly be real."

Li smiled. "Of course you would say that. You're just a human after all. I would expect nothing less." She patted her on the head kindly, making her seethe. "Just stay here for a moment. I will return momentarily."

Pin-Mei watched Li disappear down the hall and reappear a few minutes later carrying a few books. She shoved them into the skeptic's arms.

"I hope these will inspire you to believe in spirits," she said, still smiling like she was doing the human a favor. "Read those and then maybe you'll come to appreciate what we're trying to do for you. If you finish them, feel free to venture out if you still doubt the existence of something simply because you cannot see it." She bowed. "I wish you the best of luck, Miss."

She turned and headed for the door, leaving Ai-Li standing with the books in her arms, bewildered. Pin-Mei looked at her guard, then at the girl.

"Um...I...I hope you enjoy the books!" she said nervously before running away.

Ai-Li just stared after them through her crooked glasses. She blinked. It hadn't sunken in yet. Ghosts? Real? No way...

_Wait a minute..._

"IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT TO SAY??!!"

Hearing the echo from down the hall, Pin-Mei turned hesitantly. "Is it really okay to just leave her here like this?"

Li nodded. "My Lady, this really is the only 'safe' place she can be right now. And it won't be safe for much longer if we fail." She paused. "Are you questioning your husband's judgment?"

Her master blushed and waved her arms. "No, of course not! I'm sure Ren knew what he was doing when he invited her in! He always makes good decisions!"

Li stared at her.

"...Well, usually..."

There came a series of thunderous pounding on the front door.

Pin-Mei's eyes lit up. "M-Maybe that's them!"

She scampered down the stairs, practically running into the massive doors. Her excitement faded when she opened them.

Chun, Niu-Nai's dearest friend, stood before her, as wet as a drowned rat. Her eyes looked very determined as she stared up at her. Pin-Mei looked behind her at the clock on the far side of the room. She couldn't make out the time, but she knew it was most certainly past the child's bed time. With her best motherly frown, she turned to face Chun again.

"Chun, do you have any idea what time it is? Do your parents know that you're out so late?"

"Yes," a mature voice rang from the girl. "I'm quite aware of the time, Pin-Mei."

Pin-Mei flinched like she had just insulted her. She couldn't imagine why a normally sweet girl would do something as disrespectful as addressing her by her given name.

"Now Chun, there's no reason for such--"

"Where's Yi?"

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HoroHoro and Rong held their son and watched as Lien's body began to slowly dissolve and fade away into the flames.

"I'm not going to let this happen," HoroHoro said firmly. He stood and charged at the circle.

But before he reached it, he skidded to a stop. A shadow was coming from off in the distance. It could barely be seen through the glowing case of furyoku.

"GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY!"

The Ainu turned and ran back to his family. Rong looked at him like he was a coward.

"What the hell was _that_?"

HoroHoro bore a half smile. "Just take the opportunity to grin and feel victorious. The GS knows that we won't have another chance like this for a while.

"What do you--?"

There was a sound comparable to a glass house exploding. Everyone looked to see that one of the sides of the circular prison that held Lien hostage was broken. Another explosion of shattering came as another hole was broken open on the side nearest to the Usuis.

Moments later, Ren did a running tumble out of the pillar, his daughter wrapped tightly in his arms. He rolled a few times before sitting up and glaring at it.

"Ren!" HoroHoro cried. "Thank the gods you're here! What the hell took you so long?!"

"I really don't see why that's of any importance right now," he replied gruffly. "I'm here now, and just in time, it seems."

Suo gaped at him in disbelief. "How are you still alive? It was Huan's responsibility to kill you! Her plan was near perfect!"

Ren smirked. "How foolish. Did you really not consider the most obvious and constant variable while crafting that plan of yours?

"Did you really forget your own granddaughter?"

She looked stunned, but quickly tried to regain her composure. "Of course I considered her. I planned for her to be sobbing about you must hate her, or better yet, for you to have already banned her from the estate due to your inevitable squabble."

He sneered and shook his head. "Pin-Mei doesn't give up so easily. She wouldn't leave on her own. Hell, she probably wouldn't leave even if I told her to. I wouldn't be able to get rid of her so easily."

"But why are you here?! Was Huan unsuccessful in charming you?!"

Ren bowed his head for a few moments. "I was a fool for a moment, and that girl almost had me. However..."

She was getting impatient. "'However'?"

"Pin-Mei found me before then."

Suo recoiled. She hadn't counted on such interference.

Ren closed his eyes with a cocky smile. "Suo, I think it's quite clear to everyone that you put very little effort into really getting to know your granddaughter. All you really know about her are things you find useful in whatever plans you hatch. You know that she's usually very meek and doesn't like confrontation. She can be an airhead sometimes and get excited about childish things. She gets nervous when she feels she's been abandoned or that she has to do something all on her own with absolutely no assistance, especially if she has no idea what she's doing. And you know how she feels about me. But there's one thing that you only saw once, and that you gravely underestimated."

The woman seethed. "And that would be...?"

"It wasn't immediately apparent to me, either. It took a few instances before I knew that it was something that I should try to avoid...

"My wife is quite vicious when she's angry. Some would even go as far as to say that she's terrifying."

Suo's eyes widened. That weak little girl that had been at her mercy for nearly fifteen years was capable of such anger? Furthermore, it was enough to make even her husband cautious?

_It makes no sense! She never fought back when I beat her! When did she get the gall to react in such a way?_

"I can tell you're confused, so let me just say that her outbursts are very few and far between. It's quite possible that she developed this temper as part of assimilating into my family, which has always been associated with a certain degree of wrath." He shrugged. "Nonetheless, these outbursts have a few triggers and conditions that must be met, which is why she is usually so sweet and kind. Her children are of course one. Rong is another. But the one that always sets her off no matter what, the one that brings out the absolute worst in her..."

He opened his eyes and gave her a most pompous and knowing grin.

"Is me."

From the sidelines, Rong couldn't help herself. "Raise your hand if you saw this coming."

Three hands were raised.

Suo's face creased in anger as she glared at the family's awareness of the female Tao's anger. She was both embarrassed and enraged. "Stop basking in your foolish, pathetic pride and get to the point! Where is Huan?!"

Ren scoffed at her. "You foolishly assumed that if you killed me, Pin-Mei would simply lose her mind and be unable to stand in your way – a grave miscalculation. She did the exact opposite." chuckled softly to himself. "By the time I awoke, Huan was already dead."

She tried to show no emotion at the news. Huan had been like a replacement for Yan, the daughter she had lost. She had been dearer to her than Tadashi, despite the fact that he had been the one to constantly call her "Kaasan". Though she had pretended not to care, the puppet's death was one more thing to hold against the Tao family.

"No matter," she said shortly. "She was just another tool."

"I'm sure that when my sister returns from her retreat, she'll be very happy with the new body I'll be presenting her. She'll be transformed into a doll quite quickly." He sighed. "It's been a while since she had a fresh body to use. She'll be so excited."

The woman's eyes narrowed as she tried to disregard the Tao's attempts to fluster her. _I just need to stall him for a little longer. If I can so that, then Hao will..._

"I don't see any reason for you to be so smug, Tao Ren," she said sharply.

Ren, HoroHoro, and Rong eyed her. They knew she was going to try to shake them up. Seta glanced around and saw Sheng examining the tower of energy, which had by now closed the fissures Ren had made.

_She looks kind of like Mom..._ Then he realized why she was looking so intently. He frantically turned back to his parents. "M-Mom, Dad! I think Ren's still in there!"

The elder Ren's eyes widened. He had been so concerned about Lien that he had just assumed that his son could fend for himself. This didn't seem to be the case.

Suo grinned, pleased that she had already turned the tables. "You said earlier that you came just in time, but I wouldn't be so sure if I were you. You lagged in getting here. You're already much too late!"

He narrowed his eyes. "Really, I'm almost embarrassed that I didn't put the pieces together fast enough to realize it was you all along. Between Huan having your maiden name, the use of rape to frame my son and make me turn against him, and using Lien as a sacrifice for whatever ritual this is – your methods haven't changed one bit. Would it have killed you to try something different?!" He paused and thought about the last part, then tossed his head. "You know what I mean."

She sneered. "Why try something new when the old plots seem to succeed just as well, if not better?" She pointed at Lien with her fan. "Why, your darling daughter is incehes away from death. I would say that, so far, my plan has succeeded."

Ren held Lien tighter against him, wishing there was some way to prove the witch wrong. Her skin was ice cold. There were discolored circles under her eyes. Her breathing was so shallow he could barely hear or feel it.

_Dammit...I can't let her die!_

"Master Ren!"

He looked up to see Sheng running toward him. The guard dropped to one knee, her right fist on the ground.

"What is it, Sheng?"

"My Lord, I believe that Ren-Bocchama is still trapped inside the confines of the ritual!"

Ren stared at the light. His blunder had been in focusing every last thought to saving Lien. He had yet to go back for his son.

Suo made a sound of amusement. "Ah, it would seem that just enough of the sacrifice's soul was taken for the ritual to continue. That precious daughter of yours is no more than a doll."

Ren's jaw tensed as he held Lien close to him one last time before quickly placing her in Sheng's arms. "Take care of her. Guard her with your life." He turned toward the light. "I'm going after Ren."

Sheng nodded. "Yes, My Lord."

Her master saw a glistening out of the corner of his eye. He walked over and reached into the mud, slowly pulling out Houraiken. For a few moments, he studied it, trying to piece together why and how the family heirloom had been buried in the mud.

_He must have hid it for some reason – as if he feared that it would be used against us._ His face hardened even more. _Ren must have had some idea of what they were planning, and this was all he could do to thwart it._

He unsheathed the sword and charged at the light. Unlike before, he wasn't able to break through it. He fought against the barrier with all of his strength. His son was lying in the inside the circle, his body glowing, and his face concealed from his father's view.

_Come on, dammit! I'm not done with him yet!_ He pushed even harder. _I still...I still have to apologize to him!_

The heat emitting from the towering furyoku suddenly heightened to a near unbearable degree. Ren tried to persevere, but moments later the dense mass energy exploded. His eyes widened as the brunt of the force hit him, showing him just how fruitless his efforts were. He was sent flying back to his allies, landing on his right side as he skidded through the mud.

HoroHoro rushed over and helped him up. "You alright?"

His friend scowled at him.

"Well, you personally I mean..."

Ren ignored him. He stood up and held his skinned shoulder. The pillar of furyoku was gone. The area was now shrouded in dark clouds of condensed energy. Every so often, they sparkled and flashed.

Sheng covered her mouth as the smoke made its way to her. She also turned Lien so that her mistress's face was hidden in Sheng's chest. Her priorities were shifting once again. She knew in her heart that Lien's safety was supposed to be her top and only priority, but she also felt the need to worry about her mistress's male counterpart as well.

Rong was studying her. The girl's style of protection was much different from her own. Part of her wanted to straighten the guard out, maybe even push her aside and show her how it was done.

_No...Geming decided that I should continue to be exiled from the family, and that he didn't want me to bother his daughter if I ever saw her. I can't say things that will expose his lies._ She squeezed her eyes shut. _No matter how much it kills me._ She held Seta closer to her, fearing the worst as she looked to the younger Ren.

As the clouds began to disperse, Ren could see a shadow standing where the circle had been. After a few moments, he slowly and cautiously advanced toward it. The chances of his son coming out of the ritual unscathed was nearly nonexistent, he knew that. But he still had a naïve hope that he was able to overcome whatever the ritual had planned for him.

Suo coughed a few times, then took her fan and swung it angrily to send the remaining clouds away. When she looked up over the fan, her eyes widened slightly before a devilish grin spread across her face. Tadashi came up next to her. He looked horrified, his face as ashen as his suit.

The Usuis watched with sullen and defeated eyes. Seta didn't seem to fully understand his parents' immediate reaction to seeing his best friend, but said nothing.

Sheng tried to read the Tao heir's face, but learned nothing. She turned to her lord. His head was drooped, his hair hiding his eyes. The shell of his son was standing before him, but the soul, his personality, everything that made him who he was had been gouged out and replaced. The son he knew and silently loved was gone.

The boy smirked. "It's been a while Ren, HoroHoro." He looked up at him, revealing menacing brown eyes. "How have you been? Well, I hope."

Ren still wouldn't look at him. HoroHoro didn't speak. He simply watched Hao intently, waiting to react to any move he made. Rong continued to clutch her son, who was still staring at the figure.

Rong knew exactly who he was. She hadn't been ignorant of his presence at the Shaman Fight, but she had never seen him up close or been face to face with him.

Suo saw her expression and took a few steps toward her master. "I believe I mentioned Rong to you once or twice – my granddaughter's former keeper and the woman who was forced out of her family due to the shame she brought them. I don't believe the two of you met at the Shaman Fight."

Hao looked mildly interested. "I might recall something like that. I believe her team blatantly threw their match so they could escape and run for their lives."

"True, true. She was nothing without her master, so she ran back to China with her tail between her legs – against my wishes, of course."

HoroHoro slowly glanced back at his wife. "Rong? Is that true? You never even mentioned participating in the Shaman Fight."

She had drooped her head. "Yeah, so? I only went for Pin-Mei, anyway."

Ren opened his eyes slightly.

"She had wanted to go so she could see Ren again. I was tested before her and qualified. When she failed her test and was told she couldn't participate, she was so devastated. She begged me to go in her place and watch him myself. I obeyed. She wanted some pictures. I took them. She wanted me to tell her if he was interviewed or on the television so she could watch him and listen to him. I did as she asked."

Her grip on Seta's shoulders tightened. He looked back at her, concerned. "Mom...?"

"I knew that taking those pictures was invasive and obsessive and wrong by most people's standards, and I'm sorry about that. I really am. But I just..." Her voice quivered. "I just wanted to see my master smile. She was faking it, practicing being happy so she wouldn't be gloomy around him. It hurt to watch. I wanted to see her give me a real smile. Even though I hated Ren with a passion, I put it aside so I could do the one thing that I was positive would make her happy." She opened her eyes. "I don't regret a single moment of that. I made it out alive, and that's what mattered to me then."

Hao smiled. "So you ran away?"

Rong stared at him, eyes quivering.

"You were afraid of me. You saw what I did to the other competitors and knew that you would die if you went up against me."

She said nothing.

"You traced up the rankings and saw that if you kept winning, you'd have to face me at some point. It terrified you. It wasn't even about returning to your master. You didn't want to go down in flames, so you intentionally lost. While it's slightly better than what the Illy Five pulled against me, you lost to a weak team. Nearly everyone could tell that it was intentional."

Rong bowed her head in shame once more. "What's the big deal? That happened so long ago that it doesn't matter anymore. I'm here now, aren't I?"

Hao sneered. Her cowardice meant nothing to him. In fact, he had forgotten all about it before Suo had told him long before that night. He'd had a hunch that the ordeal would make excellent fodder for uncertainty within her heart, and it turns out he'd been right.

Rong's pride had caught up with her long ago as she sat in the dining hall of Tao Castle so many years ago and watched the video of the Shaman Fight. As soon as she saw the three boys fight so hard and so earnestly, disregarding fear and confronting it when they had to, the shame of her running away from the tournament came back and began haunting her. The reason she had fled, the man she had feared meeting had been part of the reason they had stayed and fought. Even coming upon her husband's oracle bell many years later had been a stab in the heart. She regretted throwing her final match so she wouldn't have to face Hao. But like she tried to tell herself, it didn't matter. There was no way for her to change the past.

Even so, she knew that it wasn't something to be proud of, and considering the men who had just learned of her actions, she couldn't ignore the embarrassment and shame that came with the revelation.

_What does Ren think of me now? And now Seta knows that his mother isn't as 'fearless' as he once thought. Even worse...what does Horokeu think? _She tried to brace herself for any jeers from Ren or disgust from her husband.

Seta smiled and patted her head. "It's okay, Mom."

She gawked at him. How could he be so calm?

"Yeah, I call bullshit."

Rong slowly looked up to see that HoroHoro had come to stand in front of them like a shield. He stared Hao down. "Rong left the Shaman Fight because she didn't want to die...Of course she did! She had to think about the little girl she would leave behind if she was killed! She didn't want that hag to make her life miserable and not be there to protect and take care of her!"

"Yes, I'd say that's a fair statement," Ren concurred. "It doesn't appear that being the Shaman King – or Queen in her case, I suppose – was her priority or even something she desired at all. It's better that she dropped out rather than be a burden and take a slot from someone who actually wanted to win. Though I'm not sure how I feel about her being my paparazzo. She'll have to do some more explaining once this is over with."

Hao's smile didn't waver. He knew that the damage had already been done. "Ah, I see."

Sheng was now staring at Rong. _Father said that the Wei family participated in the Shaman Fight on Lady Pin-Mei's behalf but the team captain forced her team to lose so they could come back to China. That aside, why is this person talking like she's so familiar with My Lady? Why is Lord Ren regarding her with a tone like she's a near equal? I don't understand...If she didn't have a different last name and a family, I'd be tempted to think that she's--_

She stopped as Lien stirred in her arms. Her mistress slowly opened her eyes. Sheng smiled gratefully. "Ojouchama! Thank the Great Spirits you're alright!"

Ren quickly swiveled. When he saw his daughter with open eyes, an uncharacteristic look of relief formed on his face. _Thank the gods..._

Suo tried to hide her irritation as she looked to her master. "Hao, why isn't she--?!"

"There's no need to worry," he cut in. "She knows that her part in this isn't over just yet." He grinned menacingly. "After all, to be a sacrifice, she has to die. Her job isn't over until she disappears completely."

Ren ran and took Lien into his arms. He held her close, still silently thanking every deity he could think of that she was alive. But something wasn't right. Her body was still ice cold like a corpse. Her skin was pale aside from the darkness under her eyes. As he tried to rationalize this, a weak, haunting voice came to his ear.

"Save us...from the hatred...of humans...Oh savior...deliver us...to your Eden..."

His eyes shot open. He pulled her away from him, holding her by her shoulders. The sense of relief he had felt vanished in an instant.

Her eyes were faded and soulless. She didn't even know that he was there. She just continued mumbling a prayer, each breath sounding like it might be her last. Ren stared at the ground.

"Dammit...How can I release her from whatever spell she's under?"

"The easiest way is to just let her die."

He tensed and turned to glare at Hao. "Like hell I'd do that," he said as he stood. "Let her go, Hao. You've gotten what you wanted. There's no need for you to hold her captive like this."

Hao sneered. "It's true that your daughter has been kind enough to trade her soul for my life, but because she's still alive, not all of my power has been restored. I want what's mine."

Ren planted his feet and pointed his kwan dao at the fiend. "You'll have to work with what you have, because there's no way you're getting Lien." He glared at him. As long as he stood between the demon and his daughter, there wasn't a chance in hell that Hao was going to get her.

Hao smiled. "Lien, will you come here, please?"

Ren stiffened and looked back at her. Sheng was struggling to keep her mistress down, but Lien flailed and hit her. As soon as she was freed, she stood and advanced toward her caller. Her father quickly dropped his weapon and grabbed her, doing his best to restrain her. She flailed more.

"No...no...no...Hao-sama...is calling me...I must go to him...Release me..." her voice haunted.

He was momentarily floored that was referring to Hao with such respect, but he held her as tight as he could. "Lien! Stop it! Calm down!" In reality, it would be child's play to take her down forcefully; to subdue her and restrain her, to slam her down into the mud so hard that he might not have to restrain her at all.

Hao smirked in amusement. He held his hand out. "Lien, if you don't come to me, you'll never be able to enter the Eden I'm going to create. Hurry up, now. Don't let the unenlightened hold you down."

She froze for a moment, then flailed harder than ever. Ren struggled to hold her back, glaring at Hao every chance he got. A constant sneer was reflected back at him.

Lien was growing visibly impatient, her eyes wide with desperation. "HAO-SAMA! HAO-SAMA!!" she screamed, reaching for him in vain.

Ren grabbed the arm and pinned it to her side, using his own to wrap around her and hold it down. All the while, he tried to bind her with just one arm so he could induce a black out via acupressure, but her struggling made it impossible for him to both restrain her and hit the point correctly. It was becoming increasingly clear to him that he might have to actually harm her in order to save her.

But he didn't get the chance to act. With one final swing, she threw her fist back, hitting her captor in the nose, then swinging it down to hit his solars. It hit him with such force that he let go for only a second, grabbing his face in pain and falling to his knees. That split second was all the time she needed to slip away and run to her killer.

Ren reached out frantically, but she slipped away from him. His eyes projected an immense horror as he watched her get further and further away from him. "Goddammit, NO!!"

Sheng had by this point recovered, but merely stood by and watched her mistress run away. Rong, unable to contain herself any longer, bolted to her in a rage.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING STANDING HERE?!"

Her eyes narrowed even more when the guard recoiled and gave no explanation. With a sound of disgust, Rong grabbed the girl's shoulder and threw open the armored vest. With barely a glance at the rows of elixirs, she took a vial and dashed to her son.

"I'm taking this."

"W-What?"

She tore off his headband before sprinting toward Lien. As she passed Ren, he could see her open the bottle with her teeth and pour the contents on the stolen cloth. After tossing the vial away carelessly, she flew to Lien at full speed. With one leap, she captured her. She quickly covered the girl's nose and mouth with the headband before tackling her to the ground. With her mouth still covered, Lien thrashed and emitted muffled screams for a few moments before her eyes closed. Her body went limp as she passed out.

Rong sighed in relief. She then got up and glared at the evil trio mere meters away from her, before throwing the doll over her shoulder and going back to the group. The three men stared at her as she approached. She put on a fake smile as she handed Ren his little girl.

"I don't think I need to tell you that she'll be fine," she said. "It didn't kill her, just put her to sleep."

"Yeah..." he replied, taking Lien into his arms. He bowed his head so that it just barely touched his daughter's. His eyes lowered. "...Thank you for doing that. I would have lost her if you hadn't."

She shrugged. "Like I'd be fine with it. I..." she turned away. "I don't want you and Pin-Mei to know what it feels like to lose a child."

His eyes widened. _Where's Xue been all this time?_ He looked around and soon he spotted her corpse. _Fucking..._ His gaze fell on Hana.

"I don't think Yoh and Anna would want you to, either." She tensed. "I don't know them as well as you do, but I don't think any decent person would wish this on anyone."

Suo's eyes lowered.

"_Mommy! Help me Mommy! Pwease Mommy! It hurts, Mommy! MOMMY!!"_

Her eyes closed. Her hand clenched around her fan. _You all deserve every bit of pain coming to you! Even then, you could not possibly understand how it felt to watch my daughter die...so do not even try to empathize with me! I will not allow it!_

Hao glanced back at her and frowned. _Another weakling._

The sudden sound of a slap had them at attention.

Sheng held her cheek in surprise, then slowly looked up at her assailant.

Rong glared at her, enraged. "Why the hell weren't you the one doing that, HUH?!"

Her niece flinched and turned away. "I don't know, I...I didn't think of it."

The adult's eyes narrowed. "Didn't think of it?! Do you not even know how to use the tools you've been given? You should be able to make split-second decisions like I just did! You should be able to use that vest to the fullest extent possible! You should NEVER be standing still when your master isn't!"

HoroHoro tried to put his hands on her shoulders. "Hey now R-...I mean...er...Honey..." he stumbled, dancing around her name. "You know that you're not supposed to--"

"Yeah, I know. But this girl..." She turned back to her. "They should have just put Li in charge of protecting Lien instead of relying on this amateur! I know for a fact that Li's more than capable since I--!"

"That's enough," Ren cut in calmly. He shook his head at Rong, as if to say that if she wanted the truth to be further exposed, she would have to do it later. Now was not the time to drop bombshells on the fledgling. "I've told Sheng what would happen if Lien were to die tonight."

Rong looked at him with half remorseful eyes. _I thought he had said that he wouldn't let that happen anymore. But I guess it changes when you're actually faced with the possibility that her guard could fail and your only daughter could die._

"It's so interesting how you can distract yourselves with such trivial matters," Hao said nonchalantly. "It's like you've forgotten I'm here."

The three adults glared at him.

"We still don't have a plan," HoroHoro mumbled.

Ren nodded. "And it'd be suicide to rush at him blindly…"

They whispered to each other while Rong glanced over her shoulder at Hao. He smiling like he was having a grand old time for himself. She looked at Xue's body, then at Tadashi, who was staring at the ground. Her gaze shifted to Suo. The woman was standing stiffly, yet was visibly impatient. Rong turned back to her thinking circle. The two warriors were still strategizing with no clear plan in sight. She looked at the ground, but her eyes trailed up to her left forearm. With a shaking hand, she touched it. She ran her hand down it, like something else was there. Her middle and index fingers tapped at her wrist a few times. After a while, she closed her eyes and smiled. She put her hand over her arm again and lowered it.

"I'll go."

The two men froze and stared at her. HoroHoro smiled nervously.

"What'd you say?"

His wife locked eyes with him. "I said I'll go. I'll hold them off for a while so you two can have time to think. It'll be easier if you don't have to worry about him attacking you." She smiled. "I don't have an elemental spirit or anything, so I have to make myself useful somehow, right? I'll just drag you guys down otherwise. So, if you'd excuse me…"

Panic flooded his mind the second he couldn't see her face. Like she was already gone.

_She's crazy! She doesn't stand a chance! Why is she-?_

Roughly, he grabbed her shoulder and spun her back to face him. But instead of a confident, cocky smile, or even angry eyes because he was stopping her, Rong's face was blank. Sullen. Apathetic. It was a face that told him that she didn't expect to come back.

He stared at her for a few moments, stunned, then shook his head and grabbed both of her shoulders. "You can't do this! I'm not going to let you! HELL NO!"

She dipped her head, hiding her eyes. "Heh…Aokun, you should know by now that you can't order me around…I'm older than you after all."

"I don't fucking care! Age isn't an issue here!" He pulled her against him, locking her in a tight embrace. "We've already lost Xue – what makes you think Seta and I want to lose you, too?!"

Her eyes softened as she looked over his shoulder. Despite her decision, she had hoped for this. She had wanted him to protest in some way, to plead with her not to go. Above all else, she wanted to know that it would matter to him if she died.

_It's been fun._

She slowly wrapped her arms around him. "Sorry, but I'm not going to listen to you. I need to do this. For me."

"For…you…?"

"Yeah," she whispered. "All these years I've wondered if I made the right decision when I ran away from the Shaman Fight. I want to show myself that I didn't make a mistake in doing that. If I live, then it's fine." She let go and turned back to Hao. "If I die…"

With one last smile, she began walking toward the demon.

Horokeu reached out for her, unable to believe she was actually going. "O-Oi…Rong…" She didn't look back at him. "What the hell! 'If I die'? What's THAT supposed to mean?! Why are you even thinking that?!" When she didn't answer, he seethed in both anger and fear. He was about to run after her when Ren held him back, locking him in a full nelson. "Let me go!" He turned his head to look at him. "Don't tell me you think we should just let her do this! You know she can't go up against him! He'll kill her!"

At this, Seta tensed, then stood up. "Mom!"

Rong finally stopped. She turned and gazed back at him with a kind, motherly smile, causing his eyes to widen. He quivered, then ran and threw his arms around her.

"Please don't do this," he whispered into her shoulder, squeezing her as tightly as he could. His breathing hitched when she cradled him, as if ignoring how tall he was.

"It'll be okay," she whispered. "As long as you and Horokeu and everyone else lives, then everything will be fine."

He looked up at her. "N-No! Just come back, okay? Let Dad and Ren fight!" His body shook as tears filled his eyes. "Just don't go…Please, Mom…"

She stroked his hair to calm him down. "I love you."

He stiffened. His grip on her tightened. The tears were shameless streaming down his face. He knew what was coming. "I love you too, Mom!"

She patted his head. "I'm sorry, Seta."

"M-Mom!"

She let go of him and took hold of his arms. After prying them off of her, she thrust them upward, leaving him defenseless. With a small hop backward, she spun and kicked him in the stomach, sending him back to his father. He landed in the mud, slowly looking up at her like a beaten puppy. When she saw that he was safe, she quickly turned and continued her march.

HoroHoro continued to struggle until Ren turned him and punched him square in the jaw, felling him. Bewildered, the Ainu got up. His eyes threatened retaliation, but Ren simply folded his arms and looked at him disdainfully.

"Are you finished?"

"…What?"

"When are you going to stop wasting your time and energy, not to mention mine, and help me come up with a plan?" the Tao said bluntly. Horohoro just stared at him like he had just announced he was pregnant. "Rong's pride isn't going to allow her to just stand here and watch us whip out our spirits and fight Hao. She's doing this to help us, and if you love her at all, you'll let her go and make use of the time she's given us."

"But she's--!"

"Don't say it. You know she knows it. That's another reason why she's doing this. Just..." He looked past the Ainu, gazing kindly at the red-haired warrior. "Let her relive those days of being in the Shaman Fight. Let her fight Hao like she may have back then. She won't be satisfied otherwise." He looked back at his comrade. "If we're quick enough, we can jump in and save her."

HoroHoro looked at his wife longingly. A slideshow of their life together was threatening to play, and it took all every last bit of his composure to stay strong and not condemn her right then and there.

"Alright."

Hao smirked. "It's funny that you're even attempting this. You don't have an ounce of faith that you'll survive. Inside, you're still terrified of me."

"It's funny how you think you know what I'm thinking," Rong said with a knowing smile.

His grin became menacing once more. "Oh, believe me, I do."

"Oh, okay, sure. That doesn't mean that you'll always hear my thoughts correctly." She took out her whip a final time. "If you don't mind, I'd like to treat this as a replacement for what may have happened at the Shaman Fight. I'm no longer affiliated with my two teammates, so I hope one-on-one is fine with you."

"Of course."

He himself had none of his disciples from the tournament, but even if Rong had her team, it wouldn't make any difference. The outcome would ultimately be the same.

He glanced at his hand for a moment before snapping his fingers. The Kwan Dao used earlier that night sailed over to him and he took it. He grinned. "Such a nice trick. When Pin-Mei shows up, I'll try to remember to thank her for learning it and passing it on."

Ren's eyes narrowed even more as he glared at the man possessing his son's body. _He can use Ren's techniques. And since he even knew about a little nuance like that in the first place, that means that he might have his consciousness as well. Everything my son knows, Hao will know. If that's true, then he'll know just how to get to us, even if neither he nor Suo have met Lien and Seta._ He glanced at Tadashi. _I'm not too sure about his part in all this, but if Tadashi knew anything monumental about Lien and he told Hao, that could spell more trouble for us._ He glanced back at his daughter. _Don't worry...It'll all be over soon._ He turned to his teammate. "Alright, let's come up with a plan. We don't have any time to waste."

HoroHoro nodded and the two came closer together to begin their brainstorm session. His back was to his wife's battle, and he had to resist the urge to look at it. Ren tried to keep eye contact him, fighting to command his attention.

_If he looks back and Rong's struggling, I'll never be able to get him back on track._

Just as he finished that thought, the Ainu turned and cupped his hands on the sides of his mouth. "Hey! HEY!!"

"What the hell are you--?"

"You'd better not lose, you macho chick! YOU HEAR ME?! YOU BETTER WIN LIKE YOU WOULD HAVE BACK THEN!"

Rong's eyes widened. Win? The thought had never occurred to her. She was only expecting to lose and die. In her eyes, there was absolutely no hope in walking away from a bout with Hao and still be alive. That was why she had left the Shaman Fight in the first place.

_He must be so much more powerful since he's already died. It'll be hard enough for those two to win. What the hell is that lughead thinking?_

But she realized it wasn't the first time someone had cheered her on, even if she herself saw it as a fruitless waste of energy.

"_Ehhh?! You lost, Rong?!"_

"_Yes, Milady. I am very sorry. But I'll be coming home soon." She paused, trying to think of a bright side. She frowned as the only option became apparent. "But I took a lot of pictures for yo--"_

"_Those jerks!"_

"_I beg your--?"_

"_Give me the number for the judge's office or something! I'm calling them! I'm calling them right now to give them a piece of my mind!"_

"_...Why?"_

"_They must've cheated! They wouldn't have won otherwise! I'm going to bring it to the officials' attention and get you reseeded!"_

"_No, really Milady. I really did --"_

"_THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!"_

"_My lady..."_

"_You're the strongest person I know, Rong!" Pin-Mei cried in a teary voice. "If you lost to anyone, it would be Ren! All the other participants are just wannabes and weaklings! You can beat all of them!"_

For some reason, she never forgot that phone call. _She believed in me so much..._ Rong looked back. _If she was here now, she'd be over there standing next to Ren, cheering again. I know that I wouldn't want to lose in front of her, even after all these years._

Hao tilted his head slightly. "Are you trying to make up for being a coward at the Shaman Fight? Is that why you're suddenly so eager to throw your life away, hoping your family will think of you as a martyr?"

She lifted her head. "You're wrong. I'm doing this for more important reasons. After all," she brushed her bangs from her left eye, "if Pin-Mei shows up, I can't have her thinking that I'm not as strong and fearless as I was back then. I'm one to indulge people. I even told my children Santa would come if they were good enough, even though Horokeu and I knew that we weren't even the right religion for that old guy to give a damn. Lying isn't a good thing when it's used maliciously, but when it comes to giving just giving someone a moment of magic or whatever you want to call it, I'll put on a straight face and fib. Now then…"

Hao smirked as the whip was over souled. He held out the Kwan Dao horizontally beside him. "I'm told you used to have quite the pokerface back then. I wonder if that's still true."

She braced herself, knowing that he was about to do something to knock her off balance or upset her.

There was a deep roar. Rong stiffened, hoping that she could keep the straight face that had once been second nature to her. In her youth, it had been effortless. Now, it was a struggle. Her eyes did their best to narrow and not fill with fear as the Spirit of Fire appeared behind its master.

As it let out another roar, HoroHoro tensed and tried to turned to her, but Ren grabbed his shoulder and spun him back around.

"No."

His friend looked to the side, his eyes trailing to the ground in anguish.

"Just concentrate. Rong can handle this herself. I really don't think she wants you to save her. Let her do what she feels she has to do."

The Ainu shut his eyes tightly, trying to put the worst possible outcome as far away from his mind as possible.

"Besides…I won't let her die, either."

He looked up at Ren in surprise. The Tao was looking away from him, avoiding eye contact.

"She's the only mother Pin-Mei's ever known, and the one who was there for her all the years I couldn't be. She loves Rong like a family member, even now. That's why she's always insisted that your children call her 'Auntie'. Even though comparatively Li's been her guard longer than Rong was, they don't have that same bond. There's always a wall between servant and master with them, even if they don't mean for there to be. She and Rong were always equals in her eyes. That's how much she means to her. I won't allow Pin-Mei to go through the pain of losing someone so dear to her." He looked at him now. "Just stay on course and ignore them while we devise our plan of attack, as hard as it may be. I believe that Rong can hold out until then. She's not weak by any means, even if she feels that way standing next to us."

HoroHoro's eyes sunk again as he thought. _This whole time, I kept telling myself that I wanted to stop her because I care about her, and I don't want her to die. But just thinking that right off the bat shows that I don't have any faith in her. Rong's the one who played a big role in helping Ren the last time we went up against Suo. He's right, she's not defenseless. She's been trying to tell me that all these years. _

"_Excuse me, but I don't need your help opening the soy sauce, thank-you-very-much!"_

"_I didn't call for an escort service. I can take care of myself, you know. I'm just going to the store."_

"_What? Are you trying to say I can't handle this bouncing job? What are you going to do – stop me?"_

_She's been this way since Xue was born. She never wanted me to think that just because she's a mom, she's weak. She's tried to tell me for so long, and I haven't been listening._

He locked eyes with Ren. "Alright. Let's do this."

Ren gave him a thin smirk before resuming their plotting. As their huddle murmured, Seta and Sheng looked on, their attention split between the two pairs. When he felt she was distracted enough, Seta gazed at the redhead beside him.

She was tall like his mother and sister, albeit and inch or two shorter. Her body was toned and slender, including her flat chest, which was covered by a stiff, backless red shirt built into her utility vest. This, along with her pants, boots, and bracers awed him. From the few pictures he had seen of his mother in her younger years, he could tell that the two looked eerily similar.

He was unable to look away before Sheng whipped her head at him. "What?" she said curtly.

"N-N-Nothing!" he cried nervously, putting his hands up in defense. "I was just looking at your clothes! I've never seen anything like them before!"

She examined his expression and his eyes. When she concluded that he was being sincere, she gave him a split-second bow of the head. "Thank you. The garb I wear is the traditional armor of the Wei family. I am honored and humbled to be able to wear it." It sounded like an automatic response.

He laughed nervously before her back caught his eye. He leaned slightly in an effort to get a better look at it. The seal which connected Sheng to her master was displayed in the center of her back. As with his mother's which he very rarely saw due to her efforts to conceal it from him, Sheng's name was etched within the borders of a circle. "Wei Sheng" had been carved over and over again until no space remained. Just as he desired for himself, "Tao Lien" was carved in the center in large characters.

She noticed his ogling. "It's rude to stare, boy," she said gruffly.

He quickly averted his gaze. "Sorry..." As she turned back around, he peeked at the emblem again, then at her.

She clenched her fists. "What is it."

"That emblem...did it hurt?"

He watched her stiffen, her eyes trying not to lose their apathetic nature as she glanced at him. It took a few moments for her to realize that she had just reprimanded him for the same thing, and she looked past him, relaxing herself. "Why are you asking a stranger such a personal question? Do you realize how invasive that is?"

He shifted his gaze to the ground, then looked up at her again slowly. "I was wondering since I think I might get something like that someday..."

She furrowed her brow. "Why would you voluntarily put yourself through something so painful?"

"To show someone how much they mean to me, that I'll do anything for them." He leaned closer, noticing how her guard had slackened. "How much did it hurt?...Did you cry?"

Her lips parted, but she held back, knowing that she couldn't tell anyone just how painful it had been. His warm hand gently rested on her wrist.

"I won't tell anyone. It's okay."

Sheng bit her lip and turned her head to hide her eyes. "I wanted to...so much. But I couldn't even make the slighting sound of pain. My grandfather scolded me after it was finished because I flinched a couple times and shed a few tears. It felt like the pain would never go away. Even when it was still bleeding, I had to train, putting aside the agony I was experiencing." She looked up at him slowly. "You're much too soft. You could never survive such a ritual." She sighed wistfully. "My grandmother said that Lady Pin-Mei's guard was perfectly still, perfectly silent. I wanted to be like that, but I'm nowhere near good enough. I couldn't possibly measure up to her. Li is much closer to being as strong as she was. I'm nothing." She looked at Rong. "I didn't want to listen to what an outside says, but she's right. I'm not a good guard. I can't protect my master. I'm a failure."

He looked away, feeling slightly guilty for bringing it up. He quickly turned back to her, a small, forced smile on his face. "Well, maybe tonight you can be the guard you want to be and protect Lien!"

She glowered at him. "Why would you wish for My Lady to be put in danger?"

He froze, his smile becoming a nervous one. "I don't! I just...I just..." He slumped, looking at the ground. "I just don't want you to beat yourself up trying to be someone else. It's not worth it."

Her eyes blinked in surprise before closing. She smirked. "You're one of those 'nice guy' types I take it."

"W-Well...I...yeah, a couple people have said that."

"I thought so. I can tell it's just in your nature to look on the bright side and tell people what you think they want to hear." She opened her eyes to see a drooped head. "But thank you. I don't know why you're so concerned about me, but I still appreciate the effort."

He looked at her sheepishly. Her smile was dim, telling him that she was probably far too hurt to be lifted by just one act of kindness. He opened his mouth, but closed it. He tried again, but failed. The words he wished to convey to her were locked in his throat.

"_Isn't that what family's for?"_

"D-Don't mention it," he forced out.

She gave him a cordial nod, and they both turned back to the fight.

_Please be okay, Mom. I don't care if you lose – just don't die!_

Rong gazed up at her fiery foe. Strangely enough, she wasn't scared. There wasn't a single tremor running through her body. The adrenaline running through her veins left no room for such a thing. Her mind was racing, sizing up the spirit and compiling everything she had learned about both it and its master during the Shaman Fight. Her primary analysis complete, she looked to Hao, eyes flashing.

"That 'pokerface' you're thinking of probably looked something like this," she said calmly. Her visage was blank aside from a cold-eyed glare. "I hope I haven't disappointed you."

Indeed, there was a speck of disappointment hidden behind his calm smile. Part of him reveled in the reactions of those who had the misfortune of meeting his Spirit of Fire face-to-face. The terrified eyes of the weak amused him. Their screams and pleas for mercy made their deaths all the more enjoyable. When he had learned of Rong's cowardice, his hopes had been moderately high that she would give him a nice horrified face to welcome him, but it was clear that she wasn't going to cooperate.

Vehemently, he raised the Kwan Dao and silently ordered his spirit to oversoul into it. Suo, in a moment of stupor, dared to question him.

"Hao-sama, would it not just be easier to utilize your usual medium instead of using a new one?"

He stiffly turned his head to glare at her. "What was that?" Fire seemed to be burning in his eyes.

She shied away, laughing to mask her terror. "Nothing, Hao-sama, nothing at all! I was simply hoping that you enjoy this nice workout before the real battle!"

His eyes smoldered, then he smiled again. "How kind. I will." He turned back to his fight, knowing what the hag's true feelings had been. Reading Rong's mind proved to be mildly tiring, as her thoughts were much too jumbled by this point with all the information she was trying to process. Patience was in short supply, so he simply ignored that part of her for the time being. He was confident that he didn't need to rely on her thoughts in order to win, anyway.

Ren tried to prevent the disgust from showing on his face so as not to worry HoroHoro. _Hao knows that Rong doesn't have a prayer against him. He's just playing with her to insult her. He wants her to lose with as much humiliation as possible._ With his arms folded, his grip on his right bicep tightened. _Hang in there, Rong. We won't let you down._

Rong took her stance. "That annoying commentator isn't here to start the match, so I hope you don't mind if I just begin it for us."

Hao just smiled. "Go right ahead."

Without a single muscle in her face twitching, she charged at him. He simply stood where he was, not moving an inch. She focused on him.

_Will he act on his own? Or will he act as Ren would?_

Even as she neared him, he didn't move, so she got ready to unleash her weapon. It seemed too easy, but she tried to chalk it up to the parasite having not yet fully adjusted to his host body. Her chain extended and reeled at him.

It only cut the air.

She skid to a halt, listening for him. Before a single sound reached her, a shadow blanketed her. She looked up in time to see Hao sailing over her.

With a flip, he landed some meters away, Rong's back still turned.

"How novice of you to think you could get a clear shot at me with such little effort."

Quick, squishy steps were all she heard before his attack. She quickly turned and tightened her whip, using it to block his blade. His menacing grin taunted her, and she narrowed her eyes before pushing the chain up slightly to expose his midsection.

A stepping stool kick sent him flying, but he gracefully landed, using his tool as an anchor. Barely a moment passed before he launched himself at her, giving her mere seconds to plan her next move.

She chose to run at him, but the mud did not agree. Her shoes slipped and she headed for the ground.

_If he gets me down, that's it. I'll be a sitting duck with a target on her check. I can't let this bastard get the upper hand!_

She dug her nails into a drier patch of soil and put her weight on her wrists. His blade came down, and she used her feet to block it at the hilt. She pushed against him desperately. If she wanted to survive, she knew that she had to force him off. Losing this deadlock could bring that crooked sword down for her demise.

Her guard dropped momentarily when she felt heat on the ball of her foot. A thin stream of smoke rose from between the blade and boot. She could smell the noxious fumes of burning rubber. Her eyes shot open as she gave an adrenaline-fueled push, successfully knocking him off balance. As he stumbled, she tumbled and rolled away from him.

Through the pain, she stood up, then looked at the bottom of her shoe. The sole had melted, burning her foot slightly. With a snort, she glared at him.

Hao laughed menacingly. "Did you forget my oversoul? The Spirit of Fire isn't something to be taken so lightly. I'm sure HoroHoro could have told you that. Or did you not pay enough attention when you watched my fights back then?"

Rong lightly stomped the ground, trying to soothe her foot with the cold mud. _Dammit…I guess I'm not as sharp as I used to be._ She reached into her vest, but found nothing – just fleece coated with nylon. _Heh…Wrong vest._

Things really _were_ different. She had been trying to fight as if she had never left that arena with her head bowed. But this was more than 25 years later – there was no denying it.

Saying nothing, she rushed him.

Hao smirked and mimicked her. Before he could see her pull back, she whipped her oversoul at him. A crimson crescent formed and flew at him. He stopped and readied himself to swat it away like a fly. But the attack hit him with much more force than he had anticipated, and he had to form a last minute resistance against it. The sheer force was to be reckoned with, and it sparked, nipping at his wrists. With a bump, he finally deflected it. It soared up into the air, where it vaporized.

He glanced at the sky, then at Rong. "What a nice parlor trick," he said with a renewed smile. He sneered and raised the weapon, flames engulfing the end. "But if that's all you can do, then I'm already bored."

The Kwan Dao was pointed at her.

"Let's try something else."

He caught Ren's eye and gave him a taunting grin.

"CHUUKA ZANMAI!"

Ren noticeably tensed at hearing his attack being used against an ally. HoroHoro was doing his best to focus his attention at the ground, resisting the urge to check up on Rong.

Her senses were failing her. Hao's attack pattern was neither his usual technique nor totally that of Tao Ren II. It was near impossible to read a style she knew nothing about, especially since she was so rusty.

Luckily, Ren's stolen attack was nothing new to her. She had seen it performed many times during Ren's exhibitions to show off his children's abilities. She dodged the dancing blade in every direction. Heat emitted from it, giving her a silent warning that she had best be on her toes. All it took was one misstep, and she could die right then and there.

But even with near-perfect footwork, she was still at Hao's mercy. He had taken her lead and was now calculating her movements as well. He found a hole, and gave one final stab.

A burning sensation entranced her as her chest was slashed, her shirt and vest singed. Once she gained her footing, and he backed off to watch her bewilderment, she looked down at her wound. A second degree burn had appeared as proof of her split-second defeat. Even as the pain washed over her, igniting her veins with agony, she held in a cry, and only allowed herself to inhale harshly a few times. She refused to give the fiend the screaming he so desired.

Hao let out a sound of amusement, but it was plain to see that his patience was wearing thin. "Hnn…Still trying to act tough?"

She only gave slow, deep breaths as she glared at him, a hand over her bosom. His face became slightly contorted.

"Humph."

He spun around and aimed the Kwan Dao at Sheng and Seta, who were still guarding an unconscious Lien as they watched the fight. The demon sneered as a burst of flames shot toward them. They were far enough away that he had time to glance back at his opponent, expectancy in his eyes. Rong was already sprinting past him, desperate to reach the would-be victims in time.

Seta was already staring at the balled inferno in horror. He tried to scoop Lien into his arms and move, but with his eyes so transfixed on the hellfire, it was no use. His instincts were failing him, and his legs refused to move. Beside him, Sheng was tentatively standing up. By the time she would be able to carry Lien on her back, it would be too late. Her only option was to deflect it.

Just as it approached, and she put her tonfas up to attempt to make her oversoul into a thin ward like she had been taught, Rong sidestepped in front of her. With a flick of her wrist, the sectioned whip assembled itself into a diamond, the extra length of it stretching across it to make it resemble a glowing kite. The flames smashed into the shield, pushing her back slightly. Sheng watched her, stupefied.

After some grunting as she struggled to make the barrier last, Rong looked back at her. Their red eyes met, locking in an uncomfortable gaze. For what seemed like the first time, Sheng understood exactly what the woman's face was trying to tell her. She swallowed.

Rong nodded at her.

She nodded back, then moved to turn around.

"Hold on."

She stopped."

"Third row, fourth one from your right."

"What?"

"The vial in your vest. Give it to me."

"Oh! Right!" The guard fumbled with her fasteners, then opened her stash of medicine and picked out the bottle Rong specified. She held it out to her. "H-Here!"

"I've got my hands full right now. Just leave in on the ground."

She nodded minimally and obeyed her. With one last glance, she grabbed Lien and carried her out of the line of fire.

"You too, Seta. Go."

He awoke from his trance, but just blinked at her.

"GO."

He looked like he was going to protest, but his father called.

"Do what she says! Get out of there!"

Seta saw how reluctant HoroHoro was to let her fight alone. He himself wanted to step in and save his wife, but he was still holding back. The boy thought for a moment, then ran away.

Rong smiled and turned back to see Hao shoot another missile of fire at her, bringing her shield to its limit. With the last of her strength, she pushed against it, causing it to disperse.

She stood weakly, her arms and parts of her face burnt and smoldering. Her whip was as hot as an iron, and made the mud hiss when it fell to the ground like a dead snake. She slumped forward, then caught herself.

_They're not done yet…I can't stop…even if it kills me…I have to keep fighting…_

With a shaking hand, she reached down for her whip, wincing when she realized it was still hot. Her hand trailed to the green-capped bottle and grasped it. After opening it, she poured bits of the liquid inside upon her burned skin. The pain wasn't disappearing as quickly and as much as she had hoped, but it was arguably better than nothing. She finally picked her heated weapon up, trying to hold it as she always did.

"As interesting as that was, I think you've outlived your usefulness," Hao said in a mocking tone.

She seethed and took a positioned herself to attack again.

_I'll show you…You bastard…_

He scoffed at her. "I'll allow you to live out your dying wish, as I'm sure you want to die just as you would have had you opposed me in the Shaman Fight."

When she didn't make any sort of retort, he grinned. After looking at HoroHoro's back, wishing he would turn around for the finale, he charged at her.

Rong braced herself and took a few steps, then stopped.

He had disappeared. She froze.

_H-How did he-?!_

In a flash, his nose was mere centimeters from hers. He grinned at her as her eyes widened.

"So…

…Small."


	89. Helpless As a Babe

That break was a little longer than I would have liked, but not much I can really do about it now. I'll be moving soon, so I have to pack up and such. Who knows? Maybe a new space will help the creative juices. :)

Sorry if you don't like how short the chapter is. I've had a poll up for the last few months asking if you would like it more if I did long chapter or shorter chapters, meaning I'd have more chapters in total. The majority currently says shorter chapters, so I'll try that. I sometimes felt that if I went over 100 or something that you all would think that I don't have an ending for this and give up. But if numbers don't matter, I'll be more than happy to break things up a little for the sake of more frequent updates. (At least that's what I hope it will add up to!) I have an ending, which will come after this arc. We'll get there, don't worry :)

Thanks for your patience, by the way. Just one of many reasons why you guys are awesome.

And for those of you who had to deal with it, I'm sorry for the messy chapters that occurred as a result of the page breaks I used to use being deleted without my knowledge. It looks awful, and I'm trying to fix them as fast as I can. Thanks again for your patience!

**Notes: The Ryukyuan are a demographic of indigenous people who live in the Ryukyuan islands. Some of them also live in Okinawa, and speak a division of Japanese, aptly titled "Okinawan". I will be using the Okinawa native sect whenever I mention them within the story.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Eighty-Nine: Helpless As a Babe**

* * *

"_So...Small..._"

The moment those words reached his ears, HoroHoro spun around, his eyes filled with horror.

"RONG!!"

Hao made eye contact with him, then slashed diagonally upwards at Rong's chest. She couldn't find it in her to dodge, so it hit her, the force pulling her off the ground. With her suspended, he thrust the burning blade into her midsection. As it entered her, her entire body became engulfed in flames. When he was satisfied, he pulled the weapon out, then gave a swift kick to the wound. She sailed across the clearing and crashed into the ground.

She twitched. Her body would still feel the flames around her, though they had disappeared when the Kwan Dao was pulled out. They hadn't been as intense as they could have been. Hao had purposely held back on her. After teasing her about taking the easy way out, he wasn't about to let her die peacefully.

She could hear him approaching her, ready to deal the final blow. Despite the pain she struggled to stand, determined to continue fighting. It was fruitless. Her body had already shut down and given up. She couldn't even turn her head.

"I suppose this means it was smart of you to run away," her adversary chortled.

The truth stung her. It burned more than the flames she had just been covered with.

_I'm so fucking weak..._

She tensed and waited for him to kill her. He grinned as the Kwan Dao began its descent, ready to savor her family's angst-ridden faces.

CLANG

Rong's eyes opened slightly, then shifted their gaze. Two strong legs were standing on either side of her. Even with her blurred vision, she could make out the form of expensive black slippers.

"Hnn...Don't you think Rong will be upset if you step in like this?" Hao taunted.

"I really couldn't care less," Ren replied defiantly. "We care more about her survival than her pride at the moment."

Hao's eyes flashed as he smirked. "You're wasting your time with her. Without Pin-Mei's healing arts, you have no way of treating her injuries. Isn't that right?"

Ren remained silent as he continued to push against his Kwan Dao with Houraiken. _Bastard._

HoroHoro dashed to his wife and held out his ikupasuy. "Kororo!" His friend chirped and oversouled into the prayer stick. He looked up. "Okay, Ren!"

Ren nodded and shoved Hao back with all the force he had. When their enemy was far enough away, he jumped back. A tall, thick wall of ice arose and created a protective circle around the group. HoroHoro handed his oversoul to Ren to hold while he saw to Rong.

He propped her up, taking off his coat and pressing it against her in an effort to stop the bleeding. "Dammit...I don't have anything to wrap around her!"

Sheng watched them, subconsciously touching the back of her neck. After thinking it over, she turned and quickly unraveled the bandages that bound her chest. When she had retied her halter top, she sheepishly held them out to the distraught man.

"Here."

He looked her over, obviously surprised. As far as Sheng knew, Rong was just an unfortunate soul caught in the crossfire. There was no real reason for her to help. Nevertheless, he would be foolish not to accept any help at this point. He gratefully took the bandage from her.

"This too..." She gave him a vial with a green cap, quickly looking away.

Rong looked at the girl's vest. Just as she thought, the space for the Last Rites bottle was bare. _Heh...Thanks..._

HoroHoro poured it on her wounds, then tightly wrapped her in the bandage. When he was through, his lap was covered in her blood. Horrified, he held her close to him as Seta joined them.

"J-Just hold on, okay?" Horokeu said in a shaky voice. "Pin-Mei will show up soon, then you'll be as good as new!"

Ren bowed his head. The Ainu was only giving his wife and son false hope. Pin-Mei was most likely still sleeping as he had told her to. At the same time, he couldn't bring himself to shatter that hope, however small.

Seta couldn't say anything. He just stared at his mother in disbelief. He had always admired how strong she was, both mentally and physically. It was nauseating to see her in such a vulnerable state – to see her skin go pale and the light in her eyes begin to fade.

His father saw this and shook her. "R-Rong! Just stay with us! Remember I told you that you better not die?!"

"...Yeah...I can't die...I don't want Seta to grow up to be a dolt like you..." she whispered faintly.

He stiffened. "That's right! You don't want me raising Seta all alone, do you?! I'll screw up so bad, he'll never get Lien to like him!" he said with a nervous laugh. "Remember you said that you'd make sure they got together? Well, do you?!"

She fell silent.

"Rong..."

"Quiet...the match is starting...I need full concentration to take these stupid pictures..."

Ren's widened slightly. He turned to Sheng, pointing to the opposite side of the shelter. "Go over there, cover your ears, and start reciting Pi."

"W-What?"

"Just do it."

She obeyed, albeit confused. Ren turned back to Rong.

_She's becoming delusional from blood loss. There's no telling what she could blurt out. I don't approve of the lies, but that really isn't something I want to deal with right now._

"Dammit...they won't sit still for two seconds...Lady Pin-Mei doesn't want her _precious Ren_ to be a blue blur..." she murmured. "...and now that other blue-haired idiot is in the way..."

HoroHoro and Seta looked down at her, both at a loss for words. Her husband shook her. "Rong! The Shaman Fight's over! It's been over for a long fucking time!"

He saw images of her smiling as she made dinner. Her dropping a laundry basket on him, demanding he do his part. How she clutched him at the hospital as they watched over Xue. The look in her eyes as she stood before him in her bridal robes – wearing one of few bashful smiles she had given him.

"Don't you remember anything that's happened since then? You're not fighting anymore! You've left Pin-Mei in Ren's care since we rescued her! You don't have to stand on the battlefield by yourself anymore!"

Rong pictured her eighteen year-old self standing in a dark arena, whip in hand, her head bowed. It had been so hard being the only one who could properly defend her mistress. Ling and Shu were nowhere near as adept in fighting, and barely served as body shields. The pressure to do well. The pressure to uphold her family's honor. It brought her to her knees.

But a hand offered itself to her. She looked up to see a smiling face. She looked around. Ren and Pin-Mei stood to her right, her children to her left. She reached for the hand.

"...That's right...all of that is over...I'm not in that place anymore..." she whispered. "…Who shall I die as...Wei Rong...Usui Rong...Wei..."

It was then that it hit him; even after all of these years, Rong had never been completely his. No matter how much love he gave, nothing could undo the wiring that had been put in place when she was an infant. A piece of her would always belong to Pin-Mei. It wasn't enough to cause her love for him to waver by any means, but he now saw why she had been so caught up in her past for the last week. Traditionally, a Wei warrior was supposed to die protecting her mistress or die when her lady did, whether it was her fault or not. Her service had ended prematurely. As Rong herself had said, she hadn't accepted that Pin-Mei was no longer in her care. That was why she had exploded at her former mistress's plea for help. That was why she was so bent on fighting a losing battle. He'd had a bittersweet feeling when Seta had told him about his mother's assistance in choosing a lemur plush for Lien. It had only served to recount old memories of the duty she once had.

"Usui Rong..." she breathed. "After all...I'm a wife and mother first..." _The people I must protect..._

Seta quickly captured her hand, squeezing it tight. "M-Mom..."

Her eyes slowly blinked. "Ren...would you mind telling Pin-Mei that it was a cheap shot? I don't want her to think I'm weak."

Ren lowered his eyes. "She wouldn't think you were weak at all. Don't think such foolish things."

The woman smiled. "Maybe." She turned to her husband. "Hey...remember when we first met?"

"Of course I do..." he said with a shaky laugh. "I thought you were a butch lesbian that needed to get laid, but then I got to know you, and it was so stupid of me to think that. I admired how strong you were when we fought Suo, and how you kept fighting even after Pin-Mei died." He saw her eyes twitch ever so slightly – narrowing and then relaxing again. "What is it?"

"Is that the earliest you remember?"

He tilted his head. "Yeah...why? Am I missing something?"

She started to say something, then decided against it. Instead, she smiled faintly and gathered her thoughts. "No, nothing. Guess I'm just imagining things."

He dismissed it, not wanting to waste time on trivial details.

"The fire went out...?" she whispered.

"What?"

She inhaled deeply, her body trembling as she reached for his hand. "It's really dark. Pitch black. I can't see. That's because Hao's fire went out...right?"

HoroHoro took her hand and held her body closer to him. Seta hugged her, his head on her sternum.

"Yeah," her husband said in a gasped whisper. "The fire's just gone out, that's all. That's why it's so dark."

"Just...checking..."

As her body went into shock, HoroHoro quickly looked to Ren. "P-Pin-Mei taught you some of her healing arts, right? You can heal her just enough to hold her over until Pin-Mei gets here, right?"

Ren reluctantly shook his head. It had never occurred to him to have his wife share her skills.

The Ainu looked back at his wife, devastated.

"Sorry...heh..."

"What do you mean?" he asked quietly.

"I got caught up in myself and forgot that I'm weak compared to the rest of you...Now I've slowed you two down."

"Stop saying you're weak, dammit!" he yelled. "Don't you remember when I left you to go tame the Spirit of Rain?! You were already three months pregnant with Seta, and you had Xue to take care of, but you just punched my shoulder and told me to go do what I had to do. You didn't complain about having to work or about having to be a single mother while I was gone. You even sat up waiting for me when I called you and told you I was on my way home...A weak person can't suddenly take over and hold down the fort all by herself at the drop of a hat! Especially when she's pregnant! But _you_ did it, Rong! Pin-Mei had Li and the servants to take care of her while Ren was away, but you only had yourself. Pirika said you hardly asked for help. You cared for three people on your own...so don't you dare call yourself weak!"

"Alright...Sorry..." she smirked faintly. "I'm pretty badass...That better?"

He smiled weakly. "Yeah, much better."

Seta nodded. "That's right, Mom, you are. I'm really proud to have you for a mom. You've always been there for me and Xue whenever we needed you. You've always been willing to help. I couldn't ask for a better Mom. I hate it when you put yourself down."

"Thanks...That means a lot to me." She coughed a couple time then leaned back again. Her body quivered as blood began to seep from her mouth.

Tears brimmed her husband's eyes, but he forced a concerned smile, knowing there was nothing more he could do for her. "You okay?"

She nodded, returning the smile. "Yeah, of course...Who the hell...do you think...I am?"

The three looked at each other. Minutes passed. Her body quivered more.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you too..." She looked to Seta. "And I love you too...both of you..."

"I love you too, Mom..."

Rong looked up at HoroHoro again, only able to see a faint silhouette.

"How's...my pokerface...Am I showing anything...?"

He studied her. Her eyes were quivering slightly, the space underneath them discolored in contrast to her now pale face, but he could tell she was doing her best to steady them. She was trying her hardest to look tough and hide the pain she was feeling.

"I can't read it at all," he said.

She grinned. "Hah...Fuck that...bastard...I...win..."

The mask shattered. Her eyes closed peacefully after one last twitch of pain. Then she slumped against his chest.

The Usui men sat emotionless for a few moments. Then HoroHoro stiffly lifted his arms and clamped them around his wife. Seta dug his nails into his mother's left arm as he buried his face in the crook of her neck. He put his free arm around his father's waist, who quickly wrapped his arm around him.

The family of four was suddenly a family of two.

Ren stepped back and lowered his eyes. The Usuis had been sucked into this mess. They had lost the most. All because he insisted they let Rong fight. If he had stopped her, she would still be there. He couldn't fight the guilt. There was no point in even trying.

Hao grinned at the icy wall as he felt the dimming flicker of furyoku being snuffed out. Another one down. Five possible allies were out of commission. The only minor threat that remained was the double team of the Spirit of Thunder and the Spirit of Rain. Sheng and Seta were barely on his radar at all. He expected very little from them.

"Um...excuse me...Hao-Sama?"

He scowled. "What," he replied in a sharp tone.

Tadashi flinched. "Well...back then, you said that I'd be your vessel for when you return. I just wanted to know why you've taken Ren's body instead."

Hao heaved an annoyed sigh, then turned to face him. "Is it really that hard to figure out?" When Tadashi only gawked at him, he begrudgingly continued. "The Tao family is quite illustrious, not to mention powerful. This body has been bred since birth to carry on the legacy of power that they're so proud of. You? You were raised with no sense of power whatsoever. You were raised as a normal human, someone who thought shamans were only in faerie tales. When I have the option of choosing a powerful body versus one as weak as yours, which is the more logical choice?"

The young man's eyes quivered. He clenched his hands into fists and glared at his master. It was all coming together. "You lied to me...You tricked me!"

"The circumstances simply gave me a better opportunity."

Tadashi looked like he was about to lunge at him. He put up a hand to halt him.

"I really wouldn't. Have you forgotten that it is I who is supplying the furyoku to keep your soul here in this world? We had a bargain. I'd let you have your petty revenge, and you would prepare my revival. I may have insinuated that I would take your body, but thankfully everything played out the way I wanted it to. I see no reason for you to be upset. I've allowed you to remain here even after the bargain was fulfilled, haven't I?"

The fool's gaze drifted to the ground, defeated. "So now what?" He squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head away in distress. "Why am I still here?! What the hell do you want with me?!"

"You're my reserve."

His head snapped up. "Reserve? W-What do you mean?"

Hao sneered, slightly impatient. "Should I, for whatever reason, need any furyoku, I'll just take it from you. You're nothing more than a bank of furyoku for my convenience, just a dense mass that happens to have a soul."

Tadashi's eyes went blank as he took it all in. He was a pawn. An idiot. A tool. A fool. He had believed every word he had been told as he wallowed in self pity in Hell. Hao's words had entranced him. It had taken so little for him to agree. To think that he could get revenge for all the pain Xue had put him through had been enough to grasp that hand from outside the fence and make the deal.

"It's funny that you're playing the victim when you're the one who murdered an innocent girl after jumping to your own foolish conclusions."

"W...What?"

Hao sneered, then turned away from him to await HoroHoro's inevitable revenge.

Tadashi's body shook. _Jumping to conclusions? What? What does he mean? Is he talking about Xue?_

He paused. He thought of her pleas, her calling out to him, her apologies, her screams. For the first time, his mind traced back through the events of that Christmas Eve until the Valentine's Day that followed. Had she ever meant to hurt him? That day he took his life, had she egged him on? Would she have told him she loved him if he had made it clear that it was all he needed?

_She still wanted me after I caused her to be hospitalized...After I made her seal away her memories just to escape the torture and the pain and the guilt of something she hardly had a part in...And I still..._

"No..."

He dropped to his knees, grasping the mud.

"No...No...Xue..."

_What can I do? How can I possibly make up for this? If I try anything, Hao will just kill me! Xue..._

As he thought of the woman he had loved and killed, her face melted away to reveal the smiling visage that had captured his heart a mere two weeks ago. He looked up at the barrier.

_She's the only one left that I can protect._ He grabbed at his heart. _I'm the only one who can give her what she needs right now. But I have to wait as long as I can. If enough time passes, it'll begin to sort itself out on its own._ He clenched a fist._ Don't worry, Lien. I won't let him get you. I won't let you die. I'll save you._

The sound of cracking ice echoed through the air. He looked up to see the arctic wall shatter, the pieces crashing to the ground.

"Ah, it looks like they're ready," Hao mused.

Seta was still clutching his mother's body, his face stained with tears. His father was already standing, Ren by his side. HoroHoro clutched his ikupasuy and kept his eyes low. Ren glanced at him with hard eyes.

"Keep your head. Remember the plan."

The Ainu grunted in response. Ren know that this was going to be even harder than he had anticipated. He eyed Hao's minions, sizing up the likelihood of either of them interfering.

_Suo's probably not going to go out of her way to join the fight since I'm assuming she's waiting for Pin-Mei._ He raised an eyebrow at Tadashi, who he noticed was staring past him. Ren glanced behind him to see Sheng standing in front of Lien, guarding her. He lowered his head momentarily in thought, then looked back to the young man. _I'm not sure what he's doing, but considering his lack of attention during the last fight, I don't think he's anything to worry about._

He turned to his partner. "Let's go."

HoroHoro nodded. "I'm ready to kill this bastard."

The men took their stances.

"SPIRIT OF RAIN!"

"SPIRIT OF THUNDER!"

A berg of jagged ice appeared as lightning dove at the ground next to it. In a few moments, the elemental spirits would appear, and their plan would be set into motion. Both held their breath, waiting for the summoning to be complete.

Ren twitched. Behind him, the lightning exploded, stray shocks bouncing off his spine. The glacier cracked. The ice shattered, crumbling to the ground like a decrepit spire. HoroHoro's eyes were wide as he looked to his comrade.

The spirits were nowhere in sight. The summoning had failed.

Neither of the men spoke, unable to explain what had transpired. But there was no need to. A taunting cackle sounded, and their hearts filled with dread.

"Congratulations, gentlemen. You've made wonderful lab rats for testing my new tags."

They looked up. Suo was holding two large strips of paper made of heavy material.

_She couldn't have possibly..._

"Yes, it uses a vast amount of furyoku, but with the help of Hao-Sama's power, it can easily be done." She slipped the seals into her sleeve. "You boys defeated Hao-Sama without those spirits before, so I don't think it's unreasonable for you to fight without them once again." She gave them a devious smile. "Don't worry, I'll keep them safe."

The remaining redheads looked on.

"D-Dad…"

Sheng hesitated, turning the matter over in her mind, then stood up. As she began walking toward the battlefield, Seta reached up and grabbed her wrist, fumbling with the body in his lap.

"Where are you going?!"

She exhaled slowly. "I'm going to protect my mistress and her father from this fiend."

"But…Just stay here! You want to stay with Lien, don't you?"

"I do, but I've realized that I've been holding back all this time. I haven't been working as hard as I should. I need to protect My Lady – even if it means fighting…him…"

He leaned over to see her face more clearly. Her eyes told him she was conflicted, torn between doing her duty and hurting someone she cared about. She saw his gaze out of the corner of her eye, but avoided direct contact so as not to give herself away. Instead, she glanced at Rong's body.

"I'd never met her before today, but I almost feel like she knew about me, about my family, for a long time. She said things that made me reflect on my past actions. If I had paid more attention to Lady Lien, I could have prevented her from running away, and we wouldn't be in this mess. You would still have a mother if I hadn't been so ignorant."

She looked to the sky, letting out a small laugh.

"I've been an utter failure as a guard. The least I can do now is assist Master Ren in winning this fight." She finally looked back at him. "Should I fail again, please protect My Lady in my place."

With that, she marched forward to stand at the Tao head's side. He glanced at her derisively, and she responded by drawing her tonfas and twirling them into position.

"Master Ren, please allow me to be of use to you."

He scoffed at her. "I believe your job is to protect my daughter," he replied, his voice full of spite.

"I-I'll take care of her!" Seta called up. Ren slowly turned to look at him. The boy cringed under his icy stare. "I-I mean…"

"Alright."

"What?"

Ren turned back around. "Take care of her – as well as yourself. I will do the same."

Seta blinked.

"I believe you have something to discuss with me when we're through here. Don't die before we have that discussion."

The Ainu remained silent for a moment, then his eyes lit up. "Yes, sir!"

HoroHoro grinned at him. "Is that your only motivation?"

"Of course not," Ren replied. He closed his eyes, then opened them slightly. "Pin-Mei's the only one who can possibly free the elemental spirits. Even then, if she shows up and we're dead, she'll have no idea what's transpired so far. I don't her to die because of that." _I don't want her to die, even if I do. Period._ "We need to stall long enough so she has the chance to catch up to us. Then we might be able to get our spirits back."

"You think she can override Suo's tags?"

He nodded. "Can't you feel it? She obviously thinks she's gained a lot of power by siding with Hao, but she's not significantly more powerful than the last time we fought her." A certain sense of pride entered his voice. "Pin-Mei's grown a lot since then. She's become much stronger. I have no doubt that she could overpower Suo if she were here."

HoroHoro smirked. "Alright. Let's just hope she's not napping somewhere. This isn't the time for beauty sleep." They looked to Hao, who was waiting patiently for them. "Now what?"

"Work with what we have."

"Heh. Kickin' it old school?"

"Use whatever phrase you wish. Just implement the same basic plan, but using Bason and Kororo instead."

"Alright, Mr. Control Freak."

Ren didn't reply. He locked eyes with his son. With Hao. He filled his mind with the painful scenes that had plagued his family for the past week. It was all caused by the demon in front of him.

Lien's distraught face when she had stumbled down the stairs and into his arms, blood running down her thighs. The heated argument with Pin-Mei, and how he had been possessed to lay a hand on her. The look on her face when he had woken up, surprised to be alive. The way she had clung to him in the shower, and later as he put her to bed, determined to never be without him again. He remembered the terror in his son's eyes whenever he entered the Ryuyou no Ma, each time he tortured him to drag a confession out of him for a crime he didn't commit. The vials of poison that had been used on his children. His youngest son's disappearance. The bodies of his friend's children when he had been too late. Rong dying before his very eyes.

His daughter's cold, beaten body, and the haunting words of devotion she spoke for the man who wanted her soul.

As the hatred built, he allowed the visage of his son to melt away, and with it the feelings of love he seldom admitted to having. He allowed the apathy at the thought of killing him in cold blood to take over.

He allowed the killing intent to consume him until his humanity was gone.

It was all he could do to prevent himself from holding back.

He lifted Houraiken and called for Bason.

_I'll kill you, Hao. No matter what it takes. Even if I have to kill my son to do it. You won't leave these woods alive. I'll leave you begging to return to hell._

* * *

**February 15, 2002**

* * *

The mother slowly awoke, her grey eyes prudently surveying the room. Her gaze fell on the man at her bedside. He was holding a newborn with dark hair, the baby wriggled every so often, but did not cry. She smiled.

"He looks healthy," she said quietly.

The man looked down at his son and stroked his cheek. "Yes. The nurses said there were no complications."

"That's good," she said, her voice tired. She held out her arms, and her baby was given to her. "He's beautiful. We're so lucky. He even looks like you."

He smiled. They admired their child for a small while, then her boyfriend moved to speak.

"For a name, I was thinking of—"

"Yuntaku," she said, cutting him off. "I've decided to name him Yuntaku."

He stared at her. "Isn't that…an Okinawan name?"

She smiled. "Yes. Mother thought it was a wonderful name."

His body stiffened, desperate to reason with her. "But why not give him a normal name? His hair doesn't resemble yours, so he'll have a chance to fit in better at school. Why condemn him to endure the harassment you did?"

"But I had you there to protect me…Sensei," she added at the last moment, her voice teasing.

"But that's—"

"And he won't be teased. Mother made preparations to have us go back to Okinawa so we can raise him among his own people. He'll be plenty safe from ridicule there."

Her eyes were closed with her bright smile. His mouth was agape as he tried to understand his lack of control of the situation.

"What am I going to do, then?"

"Come with us, of course!" She cradled her child, gently swinging her arms back and forth. "You'll finally be able to meet my family and learn the Ryukyuan culture, just like you said you wanted. I'm so excited!" She opened her eyes and looked at her former teacher. "Isn't this great?"

He mustered a smile. "Yes. Wonderful."

As she continued cooing at the infant, the father grimaced once more. _Deciding all that on her own. She thinks she's going to raise our son to be a tree-worshiping savage. I won't allow it!_

He watched the baby squirm before attaching himself to his mother's breast.

_She promised that she would support me in pursuing becoming a police officer. How am I supposed to do that if we move to some nomad village?! She lied!_ His fists tightened. _Everything was going fine before her mother got involved. We agreed that we would stay in Osaka to raise him, that we would do all we could to make sure he had a happy, prosperous life without being tormented by his classmates. Why the hell should that change? I lost my job because of this relationship, and now I'm being shafted again. I won't stand for this!_

His student gently pressed her cheek against her baby's head. She looked overjoyed, so happy, so thankful to be blessed with a child. In watching her, his love momentarily returned, and he regretted his feelings. It wasn't her fault, was it? No, surely he could convince her to go with their original plans. Surely she didn't want to involve him in her culture. Surely—

Soft singing met his ears. He perked up, eager to recognize the song she was singing - her first lullaby to their child.

But he couldn't. The melody was foreign, as were the words.

Ryukyuan words.

The anger set in again. He clutched his pant leg to keep some form of control.

_Don't worry, son. I'll save you._

* * *

One morning, mere weeks after bringing their son home, she woke up to find the space beside her empty. The baby was gone from the crib as well. Unbothered, she made her way to the kitchen, expecting to see her fiancé and child at the table.

No one was there.

She froze, then quickly glanced at the counter. Their money jar was gone.

She ran to the window and looked out at the parking lot below their apartment. His spot was vacant. Frantic, she hurried back to their room and opened the drawer of his bureau. Empty. She opened the next. Bare. She opened all of them. Nothing. All of his belongings had been removed. All trace of him had vanished.

She fell to her knees. What was going on? Her lover…her child…both gone.

"Did…Did he leave me? Why? What have I done?!"

All she could do was hide her face in her hands and sob. He had no cell phone. She didn't know his parents' number, either. He was in between jobs, so there was no work number she could use to contact him with. She was helpless against the situation.

Her head throbbing, she finally found the strength to stand. With a fogged mind, her eyes absent-mindedly drifted to her vanity. There was a small envelope taped to the mirror. She wiped her eyes as she slowly walked over to it, then gently pulled the letter off.

With shaking hands, she opened it. Just as she was about to unfold the paper inside, she stopped and climbed onto the bed, sitting on her legs. Something told her that no good would come from standing.

She read the letter:

_To My Dearest Aika,_

_You may have already noticed, but I've taken Yuntaku and left Osaka. The reason is simple: I won't allow your family to prevent my son from having a normal life. He deserves the best that we as parents can possibly offer. I know you know this. I know you also, without a doubt, want him to live happily and have all the advantages in the world. But as you showed me whilst being my student, you have such wonderful and kind-hearted ideas, but you have no idea how to enact or explain them. You're much too young to understand this sometimes ignorant society. Living with your family will not help him prosper. It will only hold him back. I'm sorry, I tried to make you reconsider the path you chose for him, yet you are convinced that yours is the best life our child can have. I know that he deserves better, and I know I can give it to him._

_I'm taking him somewhere he and I can live out the life you and I had originally laid out for him. I will make sure he grows up to be a fine young man, one that you and I can be proud of. But this can't happen if you're here. It can't happen with your cultural influences surrounding him. Like you yourself said, "Being a shaman only brings me sorrow and heartache." Why would you wish this heartache on our only son? You may have since changed your mind, as it was a few years ago that you stated this, but why subject him to the hatred you experienced? If you love him, you will understand that this is the way things have to be. _

_You're young. You have your whole life ahead of you. You can find someone who shares your values and your culture. Once you feel you are ready, you will wed and be a mother again, the one I know you can be. Once you mature and experience the real world, the one that you desperately came here from your village to discover, I have no doubt that you can find true happiness._

_Once he becomes of age, I will send him back to you. You will see him again, I promise. After he turns 18, I will tell him all about you and make him understand why I did this. I promise I will. Until then, please know that I am doing this for the good of our child._

_I wish you all the best, Aika, and I can never thank you enough for this beautiful child._

_Until we meet again, whenever that may be._

Her body trembled, the shock radiating through her. The only sentence that had been processed so far was the first line. That was all that meant anything to her.

Her son, her most precious treasure, was gone. Kidnapped by his own father. She had lost all she loved. Once again, she was being punished for her heritage.

She read the letter again and again, finally hugging it against her chest.

"I won't just give him to you," she said in a hoarse whisper. "I could never call myself a mother and just surrender my son whenever I'm told to. I won't move on like you want me to. I refuse.

"I'll find you, even if he changes your name. Even if he dyes your hair. Even if you go to China. Even if by all logic I should never be able to recognize you, I'll find you. If he hates my being a shaman so much, then I'll use that to find you. Once I do, I'll never let you go.

"I'll find you, Yuntaku, no matter what. I promise."


	90. Try A Little Harder

Well, here it is! Less than six weeks! I'm working on my cosplay for Anime Boston again, so I won't be able to work on the next chapter at full force until that's over. But hopefully you all like this. I like the flashback at the beginning the most :3

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety: Try A Little Harder**

**

* * *

**

_Pin-Mei prudently walked into the study where her husband was reading. His eyes shifted toward her, then returned to his book._

"_Do you need something?"_

_She looked at the ground. Silently, she walked over and gently took the book from his hands, put a slip of paper inside, and set it down on the nearby desk. Ren studied her. Usually, she would charge in and jump into his lap, snatching his book and carelessly tossing it behind her. It wasn't like her to get his attention so quietly._

"_C…Can we talk?"_

_He gestured to the chair next to his. She sat down on it, adjusting the violet silk dress she was wearing and making sure her hair wasn't in her way. Her hands were folded on her lap. She looked conflicted, as if she couldn't find the words she needed._

"_What is it?"_

_She looked up at him with pleading eyes. He was still expressionless._

"_Ren…When was the last time you did something with the twins?"_

_His eyes narrowed and he tilted his head slightly. "What do you mean?"_

"_Ren and Lien…they've been coming to me asking about you. When they will be able to spend time with you. When you'll read to them. If you wanted to come to their class's Parents Night."_

_He considered her words. "I thought I spent time with them. We have meals together, don't we?"_

_His words seemed to stab her. It wasn't like him to think something so foolish. Even though, like her, he had never had a parent around to engage in such activities with, she had at least expected that he would strive to give their children all the love he could muster…as much love as he gave her._

_She silently took out two small pieces of construction paper._

"_What are those?"_

_She read them over, her eyes watering. "These…are an assignment from their kindergarten class. They were asked to write down one wish they had. Anything at all. From all the riches in the world to being able to fly." She put them in a small pile again and held them out to him. "I think you should read them."_

_He cautiously took them, his eyes not leaving her until he had brought them to his own lap. He looked down at them._

_The first had perfect handwriting, very neat and clear. "This is Ren's…"_

_She nodded. "Read what it says."_

_He scanned it. His mouth opened slightly, but he closed it again. "I wish…my father would hug me every now and then."_

_His eyes widened._

_It was something so simple. It wasn't a fantasy, like wanting to go to the moon or being a movie star. He quickly turned to Lien's._

'_Surely Lien will ask for something like having her drawings put in a museum or being in a musical or something.'_

_Her handwriting was much messier than her brother's, but he was still able to make out the words._

"_I wish Papa would spend time with me like take me for walks or read to me."_

_His eyes shifted, as if reading it over again, but he knew he had gotten it right the first time. He stacked them again, then looked up at his wife._

_She met his eyes for a moment, then looked down again. "You have no idea how much it hurt me to read those," she said softly. She paused, giving him time to say something. When he remained silent, she looked at him again. "Ren, I know that you love them. I know with all my heart that you want what's best for them; you want them to grow up and have a better life than you or I had. _

"_We didn't have parents who cared about our needs. We didn't receive the love a child needs to grow up properly. This isn't about you failing, because you haven't, not in the least. I've never seen you scorn them in any way. Truthfully, it was a little hard for me at first, too. I didn't know what they wanted or what to give them. When I was younger, I always thought to myself, 'When I grow up, when I have children, I won't do this to them,' or, 'I won't do that to them.'" She smiled nervously. "But I can hardly remember what any of those were. I forget what I loved at their age. I forget how I felt or what I wanted most in life. I had to wait for the twins to ask me for things, what their favorites were. I waited for them to guide me."_

_He was still stone-faced. It wasn't like him to have a lack of control in a conversation, but he couldn't think of a single thing to say. What __**could**__ one say after learning such a thing?_

_She got up and stood before him, then leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Ren, you are a very loving person. You've shown me that again and again. I know Life hasn't been as kind to you as you deserve. Your children know from watching us that you're very kind. They tell me so. They admire you __**so much**__. I know that you don't always know how to express how much you care, but now, they're telling you. It may be awkward at first, but once you become comfortable with the idea and can fulfill those wishes, I know that they will be the happiest children in the world, just as you want them to be."_

_As she smiled weakly at him, he glanced at the papers again. He handed them back to her._

"_You ramble too much."_

_He glanced at the wall behind her, then motioned to get up. She quickly stood and moved out of his way. Pin-Mei clutched the wishes as he left the room._

"_Ren…"_

_She heard the front double doors slam, then small footsteps walking across the marble floors. She glanced over her shoulder at the clock._

'_Oh, the twins are home!'_

_She put her children's projects on the desk and hurriedly made her way to the front hall, not wanting to break her ritual of welcoming them. It was something she made a point of doing every day, letting them know that they had been missed. As she approached the entryway, she slowed her pace and prepared a bright smile, then went around the corner._

"_Welcome ho--!"_

_She froze. Her hand slowly covered her mouth and she took a step back._

_The twins looked over their father's shoulders at her, their eyes wide. A whisper almost had them in tears._

"_Welcome home."_

_

* * *

_

Ren hit the ground. But the adrenaline pulsing through his veins refused to let him waste a single moment, and he was on his feet less than a second later. Hao was already swinging the Kwan Dao, not about to give him any chance of catching his breath. He swung at him. Ren quickly leaned his torso back as the blade whizzed over his chest.

HoroHoro came up behind him, pulling back to unleash an icy attack, but Hao quickly pivoted, slicing the fists off the Ainu's over soul and shattering it.

_Shit!_

He was defenseless. Trying not to panic, he started to step backward. Hao allowed him to begin a retreat, but then pursued him after he had only moved a few inches away. He swung again.

Ren appeared and blocked the attack, his over souled Kwan Dao held horizontally to catch the blade. HoroHoro quickly sidestepped and restored his over soul. A small pant escaped him. This had already happened thrice. They had thought that their vast increase in power since the Shaman Fight would allow them to pump their over souls to the brim with furyoku, multiple times if need be. It was beginning to look as though they had been terribly mistaken.

As Ren continued to defend his friend, HoroHoro stole a glance at Tadashi, who was now standing at Suo's side, biding his time. He glared at him, his eyes so full of hatred and spite that when Tadashi noticed him, he seemed to shrink away from him in fear.

He could never truly forgive the boy as long as his wife and daughter both lay dead on the ground. The family had opened their hearts and arms to him after he lost his father, and they had been repaid with devastation. Tadashi had brought happiness to Xue, the first man outside the family to do so on such a level. But he also stole that joy away. Her kindness and love were rewarded with death. He had no way of knowing if she died quickly or not, if she laid suffering for any amount of time before closing her eyes. That was the second worst part of it all. If she had to die, she shouldn't have been made to suffer as Rong did in his arms.

Tadashi soon looked away from him, not wanting to face another innocent victim of his foolishness – the father of his lover no less. Looking into either man's eyes would make him nauseous. He knew they had been kind to him, and this was the result.

Still, something told him that he couldn't run away. No, he owed it to the father of the girl he killed to look him in the eye and take all the hatred he no doubt felt. He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again, facing the man with painful eye contact.

_I'm sorry. I know it doesn't help anything, but I'm sorry. If I could do it all again, I would have never come back. If I could go back even further, I never would have killed myself. I wish I'd never hurt her like this. I'm really fucking sorry. I am…_

Before he knew it, his eyes had welled up. He quickly wiped the tears away, fearing HoroHoro would take them as crocodile tears.

The Ainu's eyes softened the slightest bit. _At least he knows he's an irredeemable asshole._ He looked at his daughter's corpse. _I'll avenge you, Xue. Even if I die trying._

As he turned back around and rejoined Ren in the fight, Tadashi stood tall, his resolve building.

_Mr. Usui, I can't bring Xue back. I wish I could, but I can't. But I'll make sure that I protect another woman close to you with my life._ He looked at Ren. _Mr. Tao, no matter what happens to you, I'll protect Lien. I won't let Hao have his way with her. I promise you._

He turned his attention back to the battle. The men were continuing their assault, but were making little progress. Hao didn't seem to be putting forth much effort, which meant that their efforts so far were futile.

_Dammit!_ Ren thought. _If only we had the goddamn spirits. Pin-Mei, we…we need you._

Hao sneered. "Unable to support yourself, Ren?"

The Tao scowled.

"You need that woman to have a chance at defeating me? Whatever happened to the Ren that only relied on himself?"

He tensed. "I don't seen a problem with using the resources available to me."

A quick glance. He spied an opening.

He threw the over soul upwards, forcing Hao's arms up into the air. The he thrust the shining Dao at his foe's stomach.

For a moment, hope shined in his eyes. Just one thrust, one attack to cripple his son's body. Then they could begin to heal. It would all be over. It would b—

Hao quiclly moved to the right. The blade only cut his ribs, but he was sent to the ground all the same.

Ren stared at the body for a moment. Victory had been within his grasp. _No…_

But he jerked awake. There was still enough time to deliver a final blow. He strolled over to him, his weapon raised.

This fiend. This demon. This creature that gave shamans a horrible name. He could kill him right then and there. He could end this nightmare and go home. He could—

…kill his son and break his wife's heart.

_No, we'd find a way to bring him back._ He remembered how he had thrown that love for his son away. _I have to end this. No matter what._

Ren gripped the staff tightly, then brought it down.

Before it could even graze his skin, Hao's eyes shot open and he rolled out of the way. The blade stabbed the ground and Ren fell to his knees. His hesitation had just cost him a golden opportunity.

Hao laughed. "See how weak you've become, Tao Ren? You love this child so much that, even though I own this body, and I've also taken care of Rong over there, you still can't kill me."

Ren remained silent as HoroHoro came up next to him.

"I understand how you feel. Don't feel guilty. Anyone would struggle with this."

Ren's eyes narrowed. _No, you don't understand. I'm not supposed to be this soft. Back then, at the Shaman Fight, I didn't hesitate to beat my opponents until they begged for mercy. Now…I'm not the same. I feel too much. I care too much. I—_

"_I love you. I love you and I trust you with all my heart despite what's happened. I know that you'll do what's right for the family, for our children. I know that you'll protect us, no matter what it takes._"

She had said this whilst clutching him in the shower – the only thing she had wanted from him before he left. Her voice had been delicate, quiet...sad. It was as if she knew to expect the worst – she was telling him that she understood that he may need to do the unthinkable in order to see her again. He knew that she could never cope with losing a child, but she had given him her permission and acknowledgement. Even though he knew that it was a nightmare that she kept in the back of her mind, something she tried to ignore, the expectation was there nonetheless.

With that in mind, the decision was only a little easier to make.

_I have to do this to protect __Níu-Năi__…to protect Lien…to protect…Pin-Mei._

He remembered his son whose body had been stolen.

_Ren would want it this way._

HoroHoro gave his shoulder a shake. "Are you okay? Snap out of it!"

Ren blinked a couple times, then regained his composure. "I'm fine." He pointed Houraiken at his son. "Let's go."

They charged. Hao remained calm as the Kwan Dao's blade glowed like a hot iron. When they were within striking distance, he unleashed a Chuuka Zanmai. Ren, knowing that the attack could only reach so far, dodged to his left, instructing his partner to take the right.

Hao watched them, amused. He continued the attack for another few seconds, then turned the weapon horizontally and swept it in front of him, sending the dancing mirage of blades at both warriors.

Stunned, Ren blocked the attack with all his might; HoroHoro did the same. But they were left defenseless otherwise. As he shoved the attack away, Ren saw Hao charging straight at him. The fiend leapt into the air, heading for him at an alarming speed.

At the last moment, Sheng stepped in, her tonfas up and ready to parry the attack. Just as their blades were about to touch, she cried out.

"Lord Ren! Please stop this senseless fighting!"

The body's evil grin vanished, its entire being frozen for just a second. By the time Hao regained control, it was too late to follow through with his attack. Sheng flinched, then swatted the edge away with one tonfa, using the other to counter with an upward slash.

"Move."

She hurriedly obeyed him. He stepped forward and planted his feet.

"This is how it's done," he said, a smirk appearing. "CHUUKA ZANMAI!!!"

The barrage of blades showed no mercy in attacking the scion's body. When the dance was complete, the body fell, hitting the ground with a resounding thud.

Ren sighed wistfully. "It's been a while since I last did that." After a quick exhale, he glanced at Sheng, who stood rigidly beside him. _Was it Sheng's words that made Hao stop? Is Ren still in there somewhere?_

In front of him, Hao was slowly pushing himself up, his eyes wild. "This stupid body…!" he growled, lamenting the momentary failure at the hands of the Wei guard. His eyes shifted to the group, his anger building. "You're probably feeling a little smug right now, and you think you can honestly defeat me. Don't delude yourselves."

They assembled around him.

"Be on your guard," Ren said quietly. "We have to wait for a chance to strike him. He's going to come at us stronger than before." At his command, his over soul morphed to Bushin Fish Fin. "This is it."

HoroHoro nodded, then closed his eyes and breathed. "For Rong and Xue."

"For Lady Lien and Lord Ren, and the warriors I've met here tonight."

He quickly looked to the maidservant. She turned to him, a small smile on her face.

"For Rong, that woman who opened my eyes." She looked forward. "And for that boy over there."

He smiled minimally before mimicking her. "Yeah."

Hao was getting to his feet as he turned his head. Fire surged up either side of him, the Spirit of Fire appearing once again. The flames swirled until they formed an over soul on the Kwan Dao.

"I'm done with all of you." He lifted his head, his eyes burning with fury. "Die."

He stiffly pointed the weapon at Sheng. After a harsh murmur, the massive spirit turned and unleashed a stream of flames at her.

She tensed, knowing why she was being targeted. Without another thought, she shoved Ren toward the Ainu, noticing that the attack remained fixed on her. Determined, she ran in the opposite direction, hoping to divert the spirit's attention away from her comrades. She glanced back for the slightest moment.

_Can I really outrun this thing? By the same token, how long can it keep shooting fire like that?_

When she looked forward again, Hao was mere steps in front of her. A wave of panic swept over her. She darted to her left, attempting to pass him with the intention of pivoting and countering. Hao swung at her and she jerked away, barely dodging. But the evasion damned her footwork, her balance suddenly at the mercy of ball of her left foot. By the time she recovered, she only had time to look back and see the tidal wave of fire engulf her.

It held its position before fizzling out. Sheng's body appeared to be nearly void of her tanned skin. What was left was peeling, the blood visible, yet unsure if it should or was even able to flow. Her eyes were wide, her teeth grit in pain. Her muscles seemed locked, her stance not crumbling before them.

Ren looked back at her, quickly turning. HoroHoro unexpectedly ran forward, stopping just a few steps past him.

"That's…"

The Ainu's heart was aching for the third time that night, albeit to about half the degree as the previous two.

"S-Sheng…"

"I'm surprised you care," Ren said, bogging down his own feelings.

His friend didn't turn. "Even though she's pretty weak, even though she thinks Rong doesn't exist, she's – she's still family. Rong was so happy when she found out you had assigned Sheng to Lien. She wanted to meet her and spend time with her and train her. But her brother, one of the only siblings old enough to remember her, told her that he wanted her to remain exiled from the Wei family, even though there was no reason for it since their father was dead. It killed her.

"When Seta asked about having relatives on her side, she told him she didn't have any. He kept persisting, though, and she finally told him. Since then, he's been so awkward around Sheng. He wants to tell her who he is, but he knows he can't. After a while, Xue started to care. It took a few years, but I started caring, too.

"I don't care who she thinks we are. That's Rong's niece. _My_ niece."

A small gasp escaped him, and he sprinted toward her. Ren looked to see that Hao had put himself in position to strike again.

As HoroHoro drew closer to them, Hao twirled the weapon in his hands, the rigid diamond ornament on the end now his dominant tool. The sharp tip glowed like a burning ember. He forcefully spun her to face him, using her momentum to stab the diamond into her chest, driving it through her. Ending her. When he pulled it out, his angered visage became one of deep satisfaction.

"You won't be hindering this body anymore."

Sheng fell to the ground. HoroHoro stopped in front of her. After cringing slightly at her appearance, he gingerly picked up her wrist. He waited a few moments, then bit his lip and set it down again.

Neither of them moved. Ren readied himself, preparing to back up his friend. He began to slowly and silently inch toward them.

HoroHoro broke the silence by quickly turning and throwing an icy punch at the murderer. Hao calmly leaned away from the fist, then voicelessly over souled a large, fiery blade that extended the reach of the Kwan Dao. He sliced HoroHoro as he further sidestepped him.

But the blade was stopped. He looked back to see Ren blocking the furyoku sword with his own over soul. Ren shoved the attack away from him. He exhaled.

"You're an idiot."

HoroHoro looked away. "Shut up."

"In any other situation, I'd beat some sense into you, but I can't risk knocking you out." He finally glanced back at him. "You still have a son over there. Don't do foolish things that will isolate him."

Horohoro looked over at Seta. His son's eyes were fixed on him, pleading with him not to leave him alone. The boy was quivering ever so slightly. There was no question that the possibility of losing his last remaining family member was heavy on his mind.

"You've done a couple stupid things tonight. We don't have time for that. Shape up and let's do this."

He didn't reply, strengthening his stance as Ren took his own.

_It's do or die now._

Ren leaned back, allowing his over soul to charge. His target didn't seem at all concerned.

"Raaarrgh!"

Hao quickly looked up to see HoroHoro executing an airstrike. There had been no shadow to warn him – the moon was held captive behind the darkened clouds. He intensified the flames emitted from the Kwan Dao and met the Ainu head on, the frigid fist trying to withstand the fire.

HoroHoro finally sprang away from him, revealing Ren charging in from behind him. The Tao pulled back, getting ready to unleash the attack. Hao snickered. What a foolish, predictable tactic.

But when he tried to move, he found that he couldn't. He looked down to see that his feet had been frozen to the ground.

_When did he--?!_

The blast hit him, ripping his feet from the icy shackles and slamming him against a nearby tree. Suo and Tadashi glanced at him, but neither stepped in to help him.

_I never said I would aid you in battle, Hao. I won't waste my energy fighting someone who isn't my intended target._

_Once he's down, I'll get over to Lien, then take her and Seta and get the fuck out of here. Then I can work on saving her…_

Hao got to his feet, glaring at his peons. _Useless…Useless…I'm always surrounded by useless, sniveling subordinates._ His death glare locked onto the two Elemental Warriors, who got themselves ready, raising their over souls again. _Enough of this._

Tadashi watched the demon get into a shaky stance. He tried to keep a smile from breaking through. Just as he had predicted, too much time had passed since the ritual was interrupted. Without the rest of Lien's soul for him to absorb and complete the sacrifice, Hao's hold on the vessel was weakening, becoming more unstable by the minute. If the fight dragged on, his condition would continue to deteriorate to the point at which the two men could easily defeat him.

Hao snapped his head back to look at him. His confidence instantly vanished as his master stared him down. Had he spoken aloud instead of keeping an internal monologue? No, that couldn't be true. No one else was reacting to him as if they had heard him. It was inconceivable that Hao could have seen the obstructed grin whilst turned away.

"Don't look so smug, Tadashi."

The young man blinked. Hao was suddenly in front of him. Pulling his arm back for a brief moment, he stabbed a hand into the tool's chest.

HoroHoro shivered. "What the hell is he doing?"

Ren's gaze fixed on the grotesque operation. "It's because Hao hasn't been given the chance to take the rest of Lien. He's probably hoping Tadashi's, however weak it may be, will tide him over." He clenched Houraiken tightly. "It doesn't matter, though. I'll kill Hao before he has the chance to lay a finger on her."

Tadashi also looked to Lien. _N-No…This isn't…It can't…_

Hao ripped the hand out, a barely visible outline of Tadashi in his grasp. Seta covered his mouth, squeezing his eyes shut and turning away, gagging.

He wasn't the only one who felt nauseous. Tadashi fell heavily to the ground, clutching his chest. The pain had started the second the piece of his soul had left his body. It was almost unbearable.

His eyes shot open as he looked up at the sky. Hao had only taken a piece. There was still a chance.

"What a sick fuck."

Ren shifted his eyes at him questioningly. "You're just now realizing this?"

"Like I've seen this before?!"

Ren sighed. He snapped back to attention as he heard sloshing. Hao thrusted the Kwan Dao forward. Ren was able to dodge it enough to avoid a critical hit, but his ribs were slashed before he could shield himself. He grabbed his side as he stumbled backward.

A roar met his ears. He whirled around to see the Spirit of Fire reaching down with its massive claws, ready to scoop him up. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Hao rushing at hi again. Ren ran at him, meeting him so he could knock the field away and then deal with the spirit. With all the physical strength he could muster, Ren pushed him away. When he saw that Hao was struggling to keep his balance, Ren turned his attention to the Spirit of Fire.

His eyes widened as he saw the flames building it its mouth. Warmth was coming from behind him in a large wave as well.

There was no way out.


	91. The Taste of Carnage

JEZZY PAAAAANCH! -Punches her 6-month Writer's Cinderblock and grins as it crumbles away- After trying everything to get past this slump, chapter 91 is finally done. I'm sorry it took so long, and thank you to those of you who sent encouragement. It gave me the motivation to keep trying (even if the process was unbareably slow). I really don't have much else to say, except thank you to those of you who still care, and I hope that this chapter provides at least some entertainment.

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-One: The Taste of Carnage  
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_From that day on, Ren stood beside his wife as their children came through the front door, welcoming them home from school with a hug or a pat on the head, depending on how he felt that day. His children were at first surprised by the change, but soon accepted it with a smile and a reciprocated hug._

_He had delivered one of the wishes – his son's desire to be hugged. Still, one remained, and he had seemingly forgotten about it. As her brother spent the next few days smiling about how his wish had come true, Lien waited for hers to be fulfilled as well. Finally, she cried to her mother, wondering why the gods had ignored her when she felt she wasn't asking for much._

_Pin-Mei held her tight. "Sometimes, wishes need a little coaxing. They can't all happen on their own. Did you wish for him to offer to spend time with you, or would it be enough for him to simply agree if you asked?"_

_Lien soon decided to try asking her father outright. Her mother walked with her to the study, reasoning that while Ren valued his quiet reading time, if he felt it was important enough, he would be willing to leave the book behind to attend to other matters. She gave her a soft push on the small of her back, and after a nervous glance, the little girl entered the large, quiet room._

_She tiptoed in, trying to come up with a plan to capture her father's attention. Her body shook, trembling at the prospect of being rejected. She looked down, still in thought. Then, she remembered her mother's tactics. While she was much too small to rip the book away, she felt that she had a good chance of at least being able to pull it out of his line of vision._

_Confident in her plan, she ran and popped up over the arm of the chair on which the book was resting near._

"_BOO!"_

_Her father twitched with minor annoyance. "Yes?"_

_The tone of his voice wiped the smile off her face immediately. "H-Hi, Papa…"_

_He raised his eyebrows for a moment. "Hi." He began lifting the book out from under her. "Now, if you don't mind…"_

_She let go, allowing him to take it back. He resumed his position. "Um…"_

"_Do you need something?"_

_She cringed. "Y-Ye…No…"_

"_Alright then."_

_She waited._

"_Papa…why do you smile when Mama interrupts you but you act like you're mad when I do it?"_

_He turned a page. "Because when you're married, you are excused for terrorizing your partner from time to time."_

"_Tower…rice?"_

"_In this case, it means to annoy and bother someo-,"_

_He cut himself off, suddenly realizing what he was saying. He looked at Lien, whose eyes were wide with hurt. The doorway caught his eye, and he saw Pin-Mei standing there, an intense look on her face. She didn't care about this special freedom he admitted she had. The only thing she cared about in that moment was the little girl about to fall apart in front of him._

_He glanced down at her again, a vision of his much younger self flashing for a few moments. He had wanted attention at Lien's age. Loving attention. Something he only received from his sister in sparse amounts until he was sixteen. He had silently vowed on the first night he had tucked his children into their crib that he wouldn't be like his father, that he would rise above that and give them all the love he possibly could. _

_He closed the book, not caring about losing his place, and got up. As he approached her, his daughter looked up at him, then cringed._

'_Lower yourself to their level whenever you can. They won't be as intimidated that way.'_

_He knelt down in front of her, but his mouth refused to let out a single sound. Not to a child. He would never submit to a child. But an apology seemed like the only logical thing to say._

_Lien suddenly ran and clamped onto his purple shirt, sobbing into it with wild abandon. Confused, he looked up at his wife, but she had moved away from the door, allowing him to make his own decisions._

"_N-Next time I won't annoy you, Papa. I promise," she whispered. Still clutching the rich fabric, she looked up at him, as if it would prove that her words were true. "I'll try not to be a bad girl anymore."_

_For a few moments, he could only stare back at her. Then, as if moving on its own, his right hand came up to stroke her bangs from her eyes, wiping her tears away with his thumb, then resting it on the back of her head._

"_It's alright. You weren't doing it maliciously," he said quietly._

"_M-Mariscus..lee?"_

"_You…weren't trying to be mean to me. You weren't being a bad girl."_

_She tugged on his shirt harder, then broke down even more. He tried to stiffly pick her up so he could carry her to the chair, but she clung to him, immovable. In the end, he simply scooped her up by seating her on his arm and took his seat._

'_What did I get myself into?'_

_Lien murmured something. He gently pushed her back so he could look at her again._

"_What?"_

_She sniffled and trembled, her grip on him tightening still._

"_I love you, Papa."_

_He stared at her. He had made her cry this much, and she was still saying she loved him?_

"_I…love you…too," the words slowly dribbled out._

_Lien froze, then smiled brightly. She fell back against him, this time trying to reach her small arms around to embrace him._

"_Yay," she said quietly._

"_What did you want in the first place?"_

_She jerked up to look at him, then bowed her head. "I don't want to bother you."_

"_You won't. I won't get mad this time, either."_

_She looked up at him sheepishly. "Papa…When will my wish come true?"_

_He studied her. "Your wish?"_

_She looked slightly hurt. "Ren's wish came true. I want mine to come true too."_

'_Wish…? I don't even-,'_

"'_I wish Papa would spend time with me like take me for walks and read to me.'"_

_It had been raining for the last week. Truthfully, he'd had all the intention in the world of taking her out for the simple walk she so desired, but the weather had not allowed it. Regretfully, after being put off for so long, he had forgotten about it. He locked eyes with her. She was looking at him, hopeful, almost pleading._

_Finally, he bowed his head and gave a small smirk. "Alright. What would you like to do?"_

_Her face lit up and she looked around. Spying the window, she jumped from his lap and ran to it, peering outside._

"_It's sunny out!"_

"_Well, I suppose that decides things." He got up. "After your change out of your uniform, we'll go." He walked toward the door._

_She tapped her feet on the floor in excitement, then ran after him, clutching his hand as they entered the hall. He didn't object._

_She looked back to see her mother standing near the entrance of the study, her hands clasped together under her chin. Lien was still astonished, but Pin-Mei quickly nodded a few times, letting her know that it was all true._

_Lien smiled brightly and turned back to continue walking with her father._

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Ren's eyes tensed. There was no way he could jump high enough to evade the flames. If he stayed where he was, however, he would suffer the same fate as Sheng.

_Dammit…There has to be a way out of this! I have to save Lien!_

A chill whisked over him and he saw tall blocks of ice on either side of him crystallizing and guarding him from the twin assaults. Over his shoulder, HoroHoro's heavy breathing ghosted against his neck. The Ainu's eyes were frantic. After all, Ren was one of the few precious things that remained.

Parrying both attacks, his stance weakened, his knees bent as he tried to catch his breath.

Ren put on a mask of annoyance. "You fool! You just wasted all that furyoku! You shouldn't have done such a moronic thing like that!"

HoroHoro weakly lifted his head, looking at him with only one eye open. "Shut up. Don't you think I know that? I also know," – he looked to Lien – "that that girl is one of the most important things to you in the world, and I have to make sure you save her." He turned back to him. "Don't fucking tell me what to do. Besides…" His head dipped. "I'm not going to allow Seta to lose one more woman he cares about."

Ren held his glare for a little longer. "Fine. Make all the rash decisions you like." He turned away.

His friend smiled. "You're welcome."

The Tao looked over his shoulder at him, a barely visible smile on his lips. But his eyes shot open. He fully turned, his over soul raised. HoroHoro stiffened, then glanced behind him.

Before either man could appropriately react, the Spirit of Fire grabbed the Ainu and imprisoned him in a hot, smoldering fist. Hao seated himself on the spirit's shoulder.

"You relaxed far too quickly," he taunted. "I'm not about to allow you fools to best me and rob me of the sacrifice that was so painstakingly prepared for me."

His eyes narrowed and his grin widened as the Spirit of Fire began heating its hand. HoroHoro could feel his skin burning, and he silently tried to use an oversoul to cool himself down, but it was futile. Kororo alone wasn't enough against a spirit so beyond her level. The Ainu desperately tried to ignore the urge to wail in pain. He wouldn't give Hao the satisfaction.

Ren dashed up to him. "HoroHoro!"

The man opened a pained eye and chuckled weakly at him. "Guess it was a foolish thing to do – to let my guard down, I mean."

Ren clenched his fists. "No, that's not what I-!"

"HEY!"

The Tao silenced himself. HoroHoro gave him another grin.

"If I don't make it out of this, take care of Seta for me. I know he's old enough that he should be taking care of himself, but I'd feel better knowing that someone else is looking out for him."

"Dad!"

He looked down to see his son staring at him, terrified. The boy grabbed his weapon once more.

"S-Stop it!" he screamed. "Stop it! Stop hurting my family!"

Hao turned to give him a passive glance. "Hnnn? And what will you do if I continue?" On cue, the Spirit of Fire clenched its prey's body.

Seta quivered, his own body tensing more and more for every second that he watched his father hold in his screams. He wanted to charge in. He wanted to save the only immediate family member he had left. Before he could move, Ren stood in front of him.

"Sheng leaving her post is something I've unfortunately come to expect, but you, Seta, I expected much more loyalty and obedience from."

"W-What?"

Ren gripped his weapon tightly. "Didn't you say you were going to protect Lien? If so, then why is she behind you, defenseless and completely vulnerable if Hao decided he wanted to take the rest of her soul at this exact moment?"

Seta froze, then looked behind him. Lien was leaning against a tree like a porcelain doll, her face still pale and her body lacking any sign of life.

"I…I'm sorry." He looked up again. "But-!"

"Seta!" HoroHoro called down in a strained voice. "Do what Ren says. You already said you'd protect Lien, so that's what you have to do. Don't worry about me."

'Don't worry?' DON'T WORRY? How could he _not_ worry? He had been the first to happen upon his sister's corpse. He had left his mother's side just before she was dealt a fatal blow. He had stood back as his cousin charged into battle and was quickly disposed of, becoming as barely recognizable as his sister. Now, with his father at the mercy of Hao and the Spirit of Fire, he was desperate. His father was all he had left. If he lost him…

"NO!" he yelled. "I'm sick of watching my family die! I can't stand it anymore!"

HoroHoro stared down at him with pitied eyes.

Ren, tired of the insolent distraction, turned and punched the boy. Seta fell to the ground, holding his cheek as he looked up at the Tao.

"If you're not going to heed the words of your own father, much less mine, then stay out of the way. This fight is no place for an insufferable brat like you." He turned. "And…No."

The boy's eyes widened, realizing what he was referring to. "But…I…"

"If you love her that much, then go protect her."

Seta quickly stumbled to his feet, half tripping his way back to the comatose girl. He surveyed her, as if placing her into the equation of the fight and accounting for his losses. Then he gently held her in his arms again, cradling her. He paused for just a moment before allowing his worried gaze to return to the fight.

_She feels…warmer…_

Meters away from him, Ren bent his knees slightly, then leaped up, his oversoul ready to slash the fist and free his friend. But as he executed his attack, a burst of flames arose and captured him. Reluctantly abandoning the rescue attempt, he allowed the attack to push him back to the ground. It was only when he looked up at the spirit in disdain that he realized where the flames had come from.

HoroHoro's screams could be plainly heard over the fire that roared around him. Ren leaped up once more, this time paying the pyre no mind as he unleashed a fierce attack on the clawed fist.

He never made contact. Hao had parried him, his eyes carrying a mixture of annoyance and sadistic triumph. The warriors' persistence was clearly whittling at his patience.

_As much as I'm beginning to dislike this body, the circumstances won't allow me to fully assimilate into it just yet. Until I'm in complete control and have regained my full power, I'll have to make do with this wretched whelp's techniques._

Ren frantically whipped the weapon around, using the bo section to ram Hao in the ribs, landing a kick to push him further away. The demon's anger spiked, landing on his feet in the mud in such a way that it appeared his spite gave the means to do so effortlessly. Instead of pursuing him, he looked up and watched Ren's attempts to free his friend, a smirk on his lips.

Ren cut through the fire, slicing the hand squeezing the life out of his fellow warrior. The spirit roared and the fire dispersed for a few moments. He wasted no time pulling HoroHoro from the death grip, slinging him over his shoulder before jumping to the ground.

"Took you…long enough…" his voice came in a raspy whisper.

Ren couldn't even counter the snarky comment. The sarcastic remark had been mere reflex. Just as Sheng, Xue, and Rong before him, the Ainu was going down in flames.

_Dammit! I can't let him die!_

Seta's eyes didn't leave his father's burnt face. "No…Dad…Don't leave me alone…Please, Dad…" He closed his eyes and continued holding Lien. As he opened them and looked to his left, a light bulb went off in his head.

He stood and leaned Lien against the damp bark behind them, then paused. He touched his cheek, then picked the heiress up and threw her onto his back. Glancing around quickly to make sure he was being paid no mind, he made a mad dash for his cousin's corpse.

_The fire was hot enough to burn her skin off, but…_

"_A top with bottles in it? Wouldn't they break if you fell on your stomach or got hit there?"_

"_Fufu – who said they were made of ordinary glass? The Wei family didn't settle for such inferior material. It wasn't indestructible, but it could stand most anything I encountered. They're not your run-of-the-mill vials. It took a lot more than a simple blow for them to break."_

_If I can just make it over there and take the right bottle, I might be able to save him!_

He practically flopped onto Sheng's body. Lien threatened to fall off his back, and he tried to slide her back into place. He one-handedly opened the guard's top and began to quickly examine the vials.

_There __must__ be one here that can help him!_

Some of the medicines had indeed broken in their bottles, but that didn't stop him from checking them anyway. He finally found one that said, "Antipyre".

_This should work!_

He turned to secure Lien before standing, but a blade was suddenly against his throat. With wide, quivering eyes, Seta gazed up at Suo.

"I had previously decided not to intervene, but when it comes to the whelp of that pathetic ex-guard, I have few qualms about stepping in."

He tried not to show more fear than he had already. Sweat ran down the side of his face as his mind raced, trying to figure a way out of this. He spun around, giving his neck a small scratch, but turning Lien away from the bladed fan.

"You needn't mind her, boy. She's not my concern right now."

All the same, he began inching away from the woman, his eyes never leaving her.

She tilted her head. "Come now, child. Where will you go? Will you run away and become lost in the woods? Or perhaps you will lead me straight to my granddaughter?"

Seta extended his bo staff and tried to rise and take a stance that would allow him to still carry Lien on his back. Suo seemed mildly amused at his effort, but then stiffened and glanced over her shoulder. She leaped out of the way to reveal Ren trying to attack her from behind. She scowled, then sneered when she saw the burn on his ribcage.

Seta realized that his father wasn't beside him. Frantic, he looked around before spotting him lying against a tree. He made sure the attention was away from him, then ran over to him.

His eyes quivered. He reached out to touch his father's face.

"D-Dad…"

His skin was just as dry and charred as his sister's was. Seta fumbled with the vial and dumped it on him, trying to spread it over the areas that he believed would be the most benefited from it.

"You'll be okay now...right? RIGHT?"

When his greatest fears were validated, he clutched the bottle and crumbled. Suo spied him out of the corner of her eye.

"It's not easy fighting by yourself, is it, Ren?" She paused, taking satisfaction in his silence. "Could it be that you need your wife in order to fight me?"

He flinched, then charged with another slash. She dodged and swung her closed fan. He blocked it, and they entered a deadlock.

"After all, Ren, you didn't actually fight me. You fought Pin-Mei. And that apparition fought me in your place, and he knew my maiden family's fighting techniques. But you…no, you and I have never even come close to crossing swords."

He didn't react. "I've fought you enough to recognize the tactic you're trying to use right now."

She smiled. "But does that mean that it isn't working?"

His eyes narrowed.

"I simply don't want to believe it either, Ren, but really, is it possible that a proud, traditional man such as yourself really needs a woman's help to win a fight?"

"I DON'T!" he yelled, pushing her away.

She immediately countered by quickly lining her fan with tags and sending a powerful wave at him. Ren tried to shield his eyes from the unnaturally torrid wind, knowing that his senses would be at her mercy if he took it head on.

When it faded, and he lowered his arm and set his eyes on Suo once again. "Parlor tricks aren't going to work, Suo. You'll have to do better than that." He pointed his weapon at her.

She fanned herself, smiling behind the weapon. "I'm simply stalling for you, giving your beloved wife a little more time to catch up with us. You should be grateful. At least if she were to show up she could act as a distraction to keep me busy. That way, you could fight Hao one-on-one and not have to worry about a sneak attack."

"I TOLD YOU – I DON'T NEED HER! I CAN HANDLE THIS BY MYSELF!"

"...I-Is that true, Ren?"

He stiffened as he registered his wife's voice. He couldn't speak.

"Do I really hinder you that much, Ren?" The voice was quivering slightly.

His eyes were wide, struggling to keep himself from glancing back to where the voice was coming from. He was trying to calculate approximately how much time had elapsed, and if it was a mathematical possibility that she could have found her way there. While it was safe to say that she would have wandered around for a while without an exact location in mind, it was possible that she could have had another guide. All involved had used quite a bit of furyoku during the battle, but sensing it had never been one of Pin-Mei's strong points...

"She's not there."

He jerked his head up to see Seta glaring at him from behind Suo. The boy looked enraged, and Ren couldn't tell if he was crying or the rain had simply dripped off of the leaves above.

"It's just another stupid trick," he said, his voice full of anger. "Auntie Pin-Mei's not there, so stop waiting! Just...Just end all of this before anyone else dies!"

Ren hesitated a second more before he saw Hao's attack being reflected off the blades of Suo's fan. He leaped out of the way, leaving Suo to divert the flames on her own. She glared at Hao, who seemed entirely apathetic.

"I told you that you could have that woman to yourself. I never said anything about allowing you to have Ren as well." The hag seemed as though she were about to protest, but he glared at her. "Silence yourself, step aside, and wait for your prey as I finish with mine."

Clearly frightened, Suo stepped back to stand near Tadashi. Satisfied, Hao turned back to Ren, who quickly raised his weapon to ready himself. Hao smiled.

"You're the last one standing in my way of regaining my full power. Do you still think you have any hope at all?"

A drop of sweat rolled down the Tao's face. "That doesn't have any bearing on how I'm going to fight you. I'm not going to let you have Lien."

The grin widened. "The way she is now, she's about as mindless and comatose as those kyonshii of yours. I'm the only one she's of any use to. If you were wise you would just give her up."

Ren clenched Houraiken tightly, trying to disregard the comment. Hao was only trying to rile him up, tricking him into faltering so he could deal a lethal blow.

_Don't pay any attention to what he says. Just concentrate on winning._

"BASON! GIANT OVERSOUL!"

_I should have done this from the beginning._

But he had little time to lament. Hao had taken the appearance of the robot-like oversoul as a cue for him to jump back onto the Spirit of Fire's shoulder. He smirked as he noticed Ren's attempts to hide some heavy breathing.

"This is your last stand, isn't it? You've used most of your furyoku making this oversoul, and all I need to do is destroy it, yes?"

Ren replied by launching a Chuuka Zanmai at his foe. Hao gracefully dodged the attack and diverted the blade with a single claw.

They went back and forth, fire and furyoku crossing in a brilliant display. Seta watched, his heart dropping with each passing minute. Ren was holding on as long as he could, but even his furyoku couldn't last forever.

Hao threw a large stream of flames at him, but he was unable to fully dodge. Bason fell to his knees, apologizing. His master's mind was too muddled to reply.

"My Lord!"

Ren slowly looked up to see the Spirit of Fire's large hand positioned over them. There was no chance for them to escape. As Bason became engulfed in the flames, Ren pushed himself off his servant's shoulder, landing on the ground with a sickening crack.

_Get up…Get up! You're the only one left who has any chance of stopping him!_

"I believe I already told you that you have no chance," Hao said tauntingly. He now stood on the ground, knowing that the proud man was now no more threatening than a kitten.

Ren's body wouldn't move at first, but with much coaching, he finally stood, his left arm dangling. His eyes were dulled, but he still tried to take a stance.

"If you want to beat me, you'll have to burn me up and tear me to shreds."

Hao tilted his head. "How touching. A father ready to die for his child." He swung the Kwan Dao back and began charging.

Ren weakly positioned a blocking maneuver, but it was easily brushed away. Now exposed, his chest was slashed, causing blood to spurt everywhere. He hit the ground, his eyes wide.

_No…I can't…let this…happen…!_

Hao watched with a dark grin as his prey slowly got to his knees. With little effort, he thrust the blade through the Tao's chest. "Not only that, but a father ready to die by his child's hand."

Ren slowly looked up at him, as if suddenly remembering that it was his son's body he had been fighting. He had tricked himself into creating a hologram of sorts to conceal that fact, choosing to see Hao's body instead his son's. With his consciousness quickly fading, he couldn't run from it anymore. Controlled or not, his son had the blood of at least four people on his hands. It was the heir he had groomed since before the boy could hold a toy weapon that was dethroning him.

Satisfied, Hao used his foot to push Ren's body off the blade. It fell to the ground, landing on its back.

Misty rain fell upon him, and he looked up through squinted eyes at the dark clouds above.

_Ren…_

The emotional and physical pain was leaving him, something he was both appreciative and regretful of. He had wanted, if nothing else, to make sure that his daughter was safe, but that was now completely out of his hands.

_Lien…_

He hadn't found his lost child. For all he knew, he could already be dead.

_Níu-Năi…_

His mind blanked. After a few moments of concentration, he could see his wife's sleeping visage – knowing she would most likely find herself the only one left when she awoke. The look on her face when she would become aware of it, how upset she would be, how she would cry.

_Pin-Mei…Don't…_

He replaced the image with a smiling one, her eyes full of love and admiration. He could see her jumping into his lap as he tried to read, how she would sit and watch him train while their children were at school. He could even see how she would look up at him as they lay in bed together. His mind was put slightly at ease as he heard her voice.

'I love you.'

_...u_…_too…_

He couldn't keep his eyes open. One last thing came to mind.

"If either of you…can somehow use it…it's yours…"

His eyes closed.

A few meters away, Seta watched, trying to swallow the sick feeling of hopelessness and fear. "Ren-san! REN-SAN!" He dashed over to him, piggybacking Lien. He shook the body frantically as if trying to wake him up. "Ren-san! C-Come on! You can't die! Auntie Pin-Mei will be really upset if you do! Get up! GET UP! PLEASE!"

Hao watched the boy as he fell apart, trying to hold the girl on his back steady while still allowing reality to sink in.

_I'm the only one left. If…If I die, Hao wins. He'll take Lien's soul and regain all his power. No one will stand a chance against him!_ He stopped. _Yeah…Yeah, if I can just stall—_

"—for Pin-Mei?"

Seta looked up at him, horrified. Hao smirked. "If that's what you want, I'll even go intercept her if you have such faith in a weakling like her. She's weaker than Ren, and you can see how successful he was in opposing me. How absurd of you to think she of all people could defeat me."

The boy's body was shaking uncontrollably. He squeezed his eyes shut in frustration. "Auntie Pin-Mei can't beat Hao either? Th-Then what do I do?"

Ren's look of disgust flashed in his mind. Seta's eyes shot open.

_What am I doing? Ren-san trusted me to protect Lien, but I'm just sitting here like a crybaby. What would he say? What would my family say?...What would Lien say? No. My dad didn't run. Neither did my mom._ Another thought crossed his mind. _How can I even hope to be considered worthy enough for the Wei devotion ritual if I run away now? No. I won't. I can't. I'm not running!_

He bowed his head and stood. Hao's eyes carefully followed his movements.

"Getting ready to run? Run to Pin-Mei and lead her back here to die?"

"No."

He raised his eyebrows at the dark tone. "Oh? Then what is it you plan to do?"

Seta didn't reply. Instead, he turned his back to Hao completely. Without a word, he lowered Lien to the ground and leaned her against the trunk of a tree. He looked at her, at first with anxiety, then with softened eyes. He reached into his bag and pulled out the lemur plush, then placed it in her lap. Then he pulled out the plastic bag that held the unfinished bear and set next to her.

"I was hoping that I could give these to you myself, that I could see the look on your face, but things just didn't work out like that."

His eyes didn't leave her. As the feelings of love and fear built up inside, he clenched the knees of his pants.

"I don't think I'm going to make it back, so…" His eyes shifted away, almost as if Lien were looking at him with curious, innocent eyes. "I just want you to know…"

A blush covered his face.

"I love you."

He hung his head, then looked up at her. She gave no reply. A small, self-derogatory chuckle escaped him.

"Of course not…"

Looking up, he paused, studying her once more. He leaned in, his stare now on her lips. At the last second, he halted and planted the kiss on her forehead instead. He sat up again with a nervous grin.

"Looks like I'm still just a chicken after all…"

"I'll ask once more; what do you plan on doing if you're not going to run away?"

Seta rose and took out the wooden cylinder once more. With a flick of his wrist, it extended. "Isn't it obvious?" he replied, stone-faced. He pointed the staff at Hao. "I'm going to kill you for what you've done to my family and Lien's! No matter what it takes, I won't let you get away with _any_ of this!"

Hao let out an amused sneer. He strolled up to the fresh cadaver and pilfered its weapon. With Houraiken extended, he pointed it at the boy. "Alright, then."

Seta clenched the staff to keep from trembling. He swallowed. Part of him was still hoping that he would wake up. Maybe this was all just a dream, and if Hao killed him, he would simply jerk awake and be in his bed. Either way, he couldn't run. Whether he was going to live, die, or wake up; in less than one minute, he would be crossing weapons with his best friend once again. He would be up against the person responsible for the carnage surrounding him.

His eyes shifted to look over his shoulder. He had to make sure Lien wouldn't be stolen in a moment of weakness.

"I'll protect you."

Resolute, his gaze returned to Hao.

_I'll protect you…_

He took his stance.

_I promise – for now and forever!_


	92. Lien is His That

Yesss…Here it is. Less than two months. This shouldn't feel like such an achievement, and yet, it does. I hope you all enjoy it.

**Author's Notes: The title is a joke, but like the rest of mine, they aren't funny. The first is a play on AFI's "Prelude 12/21" song, which was used heavily in writing this chapter and creating the scenario as a whole. The second is a play on "Music is My Thing" which was also used. (I don't even know why) And, it refers to the fact that Hao refers to HoroHoro's "That" in the manga, meaning his first love. Yeah, I'm not witty or funny.**

**Seta has a couple attacks that are, like HoroHoro and Xue's, in Ainu. The first, "Cwi At Piskan" means (in a "localized" sense) "Piercing Rope Surroundings". The second, "Yayattasa Koro" means "His Revenge". Whose? Well, it'll make sense when you get to it, I think.**

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**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Two: Prelude 02/13 (or, Lien is His "That")**

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"Seta, if you keep shaking like that, your present will unwrap itself."

The Ainu looked at his friend nervously. "I can't help it! This is nerve-racking! What if she rejects me?"

Ren shrugged, unable to give an answer.

The present was, of course, the Ainu equivalent of passing a note to your classmate, asking them to check a box as to whether they "liked" you or not. It was a risk. It had taken years for Seta to work up the courage to speak his feelings for the Tao heiress, and even then, it was Ren who dragged it out of him.

"_Question."_

"_A-Answer?"_

_He stared at him with threatening eyes. "You have a crush on my sister, don't you?"_

"_W-What? How did you know?"_

"_Seta, it's been the elephant in the room for the past three years at least."_

"_D-D-D-Does…"_

"_Oh, he's very much aware."_

Seta had on a similar face today – he looked as if he were mere moments away from vomiting or fainting. Behind his straight face, Ren felt sorry for him.

_This would be easier on him if Lien wasn't so oblivious._

True, nearly everyone who saw Seta and Lien interact could tell that the boy's feelings transcended those of a simple friendship. But Lien herself showed neither signs of acceptance nor rejection of his affections.

Not only was the adult Tao aware, he was the first to verbally expose the affair. As he stood with his oldest son a few meters away from Lien, who was showing Seta her latest art pieces, he studied the boy's eyes, the way he smiled, how he would sometimes gaze at his daughter instead of the work she had in her hands. A small smile crept onto his lips.

"_Humph. That's interesting."_

_His son closed his eyes with a smirk. "Indeed, very."_

_Pin-Mei nodded, smiling with shining eyes. "Yes, it's perfect."_

Ren clenched a fist. _Even Mother was able to identify that something more was going on, and she tends to miss obvious things like that._ He looked at his sister. _Come on, Lien. I know you're smarter than this. You can't possibly be playing dumb, can you? You better not be stringing him along…_

"R-Ren!" Seta cried, latching onto his friend. "H-Help me! I don't want her to reject me!"

"Of course you don't," he said flatly. "I know you worked hard on your gift. I'm sure that at the very least she'll appreciate that."

The red head clutched his present. "H-How long until I have to give this to her?"

"Give me what?"

Seta jumped a mile, the looked over his shoulder before swiveling to see Lien smiling, her braided loops dangling as she swayed from side to side.

"I-I-I—" He clutched the gift to his chest. She tilted her head and looked at it.

"Is that a gift for Niisama?"

Scared that she would assume that he hadn't gotten her anything, he shoved the present into her arms. "N-No! This is for you!"

She took it, blinking a few times, then smiled again. "Thank you, I'm sure I'll love it." She turned, then looked back. "We'll be opening presents soon, so I'll be sure to open yours first."

As she vanished through the doorway, Seta fell to his knees, grasping the sides of his head. "Oh Gods…Oh Gods…Oh Gods…"

"Nice job," Ren said stoically. "You've finally made your move."

"B-But…If she…"

"Silence. She has it. She's going to open it, and that's that. Let things take their course, and hope for the best."

Seta sulked. "I feel sick."

Ren didn't look at him. "Oh, I bet you do."

Pin-Mei appeared. "Ren, honey, we're going to open gifts now. Could you come to the hall, please?"

He nodded. "I'll be there in a moment, Mu Qin."

She smiled, momentarily admiring how much he resembled his father at his age, then went on ahead. Ren glanced at his friend, now in a near vegetative state.

"Come on, let's put you out of your misery." He began heading into the hall. Seta slowly stood and followed him.

When they entered the room, Lien waved them over to the large, velvet couch. Ren sat next to his twin, who quickly handed him a gift.

He turned it over, studying it. "You didn't need to get me anything."

She smiled, her cheeks pink. "I know. I wanted to."

He smirked, then grabbed a box wrapped in ivory paper from the low table in front of him and tossed it to her. She caught it by clapping her hands on either side of it.

"N-Niisama…"

"Of course I have a gift for you. What kind of brother would I be if I didn't take care of my Mei-Mei?"

Her eyes shined, but he quickly gestured to the parcel on her lap. "Open Seta's first like you promised."

"Oh! Right!"

She quickly turned her attention to Seta's gift. Her mother tried to lean in discreetly, eager to see what would be revealed, but Ren gently pulled her back by her collar. Seta held his breath as Lien tried to unwrap the gift in an eager yet humble way. She removed the cloth inside and stared at its contents.

A small knife with an intricately carved handle now sat in her lap. A simple suede loop was attached.

Ren could tell from his sister's eyes that she was conflicted. She wanted to ask, 'What is this?', but it was most obviously a knife. She wanted to ask, 'Why did you get me this?', but that reeked of ungratefulness. He quickly threw her a line.

"Seta made that all by himself. It took him weeks to make the handle look just the way he wanted it to."

She quickly picked up the dagger and examined the area in question. "Oh! I see! You must have spent a really long time on this!"

Seta nodded nervously. "Yeah…"

The elder Ren inched closer to HoroHoro. "Care to explain why the hell your son is giving my daughter a weapon for her birthday?" he asked out of the side of his mouth, trying to stay quiet.

"It's an Ainu tradition," he whispered back. "He's basically asking her out. If Lien accepts, she'll put the loop on her wrist."

Ren paused.

"…Yeah, sorry, I guess he should have asked you first. Don't be too hard on him okay?"

"That actually wasn't my first thought, but thank you, I'll deal with that later." He made eye contact with him. "Does Lien know about this tradition of yours?"

HoroHoro's eyes widened, then he tried to laugh it off. "…Hopefully?"

"Because she definitely wouldn't have learned about it from me, since this is the first I've heard of it. Unless Pin-Mei…" He turned to her and snapped his fingers quietly, grabbing her attention. She discreetly side stepped to meet him.

"Ren, do you know anything about this?" she whispered.

He sighed. "That answers that."

Rong shuffled over. "Did Seta tell her the significance of this?" Silence. "I'm taking that as a no."

HoroHoro facepalmed. "Seta, you ninny…"

Pin-Mei bit her lip. "Couldn't we just tell her now?"

Ren shook his head. "That would put her on the spot – not a desirable situation."

She looked back to the young Ainu. "Poor Seta…"

Ren tried to think as hard as he could, hoping that, for even just a moment, the twin telepathy trope would kick in and his sister could avoid disappointing their friend. But Lien only held onto the knife, putting it in its cloth sheath with a nervous smile.

"Thank you very much, Seta. I'll take very good care of it," she said, the hugged him. He accepted it, looking over at his parents who gave him sympathetic eyes.

As far as he was concerned, he had been rejected.

* * *

_That was a few years ago. It was my own fault for not even telling her about the custom._ He gripped the staff tightly. _I came here to try again, to be straightforward. No ambiguous gifts; just me telling her how much she means to me._ _How much she's always meant to me._ Visions of her as they grew up together flooded his mind. _But now, it looks like I won't be able to tell her. If I want any sort of chance, I need to make sure she survives._

His gaze shifted to the bodies of the two legendary warriors near him. _Dad…Ren-san…I won't let either of you down. Even if I die, I'll make sure Lien is safe!_

He charged at Hao, the Bo raised. Hao easily parried.

"If this is the best you can do, I suggest you simply lay on the ground so I can get on with my ritual."

"I…refuse!" He pushed the demon back.

Hao glared at him, then his eyes flashed and he straightened, smirking. "Every single pathetic fool who has challenged me tonight has had the same thought-

"_How do I defeat him without killing Ren?_"

Seta flinched.

"Even you're thinking that right at this very moment. After watching your family and friends die in front of you, you still cling to the hope that you can separate my soul from this body. At first, I didn't mind humoring those idiots with their attempts to beat me, but now, I've grown quite tired of all this interference." Houraiken was suddenly covered in a large, flaming oversoul. "If you insist on continuing this farce of a fight, you'd best use whatever pathetic oversoul you have. Even you should know that you can't fight me as a mere human and expect to win."

Seta held the staff vertically. "I was hoping that I could let my partner sleep a bit longer so I could avoid his temper, but I guess I have no choice." He closed his eyes, breathed, then opened them again.

"Apollo! Oversoul!"

The pale red outline of a gigantic bear appeared above him. It roared before swirling and engulfing the weapon.

Hao raised his eyebrows. "A simple bear?"

Seta twirled the rod and pointed it at him. "No, he's anything but. I don't know if you're aware, Hao, but the bear is the most scared animal to the Ainu. It's a symbol of power. Each year we praise them through ceremonies and we never waste a single part of the body after we kill one, whether it be for food or clothing, we use it all.

"Dad told me about the Shaman Fight when I was little, and he told me about the bear he found when he got lost. He told me that this bear was so powerful yet so misunderstood, just like Shamans are. That bear is Apollo. When I heard about heard about him and how he had murdered by poachers, I knew that I had to take him in. I knew that he would make a powerful ally.

"Apollo was hard to tame, no question about that. But he's proven to be a very loyal partner. I have enough of a handle on him that he cares about what I care about, and I care about what he cares about, too. If he didn't care, he would be very reluctant to oversoul for me. I've told him about Lien, and how I want to protect her. He's met the rest of my family, my friends."

"You think that after being killed by humans, that bear would honestly want to assist you with doing anything short of revenge?"

Seta smiled. "Apollo still remembers a girl who did her best to protect him when he was alive, and he knows that good people exist. Believe me…"

He swung the staff, a large sickle extending, completing the oversoul.

"He cares."

Hao tilted his head. "And I suppose you believe that simply caring will aid you in achieving victory?"

"Not at all," Seta said. He pulled the scythe back. "But having a spirit with an actual soul helps."

Hao grinned darkly. "Let's test just how helpful that is."

His oversoul glowing, he charged at him. After pausing for a moment, as if startled, Seta followed suit. He quickly waved the blade, catching Hao's weapon in the arch. Hao watched as the young Ainu tried to fully deflect her oversoul. With minimal effort, he forced the scythe in the opposite direction, causing Seta to be brought forward enough to be kneed in the face. He stumbled backward, trying to stop his vision from doubling. Just as he could see clearly again, Hao thrust at him with a lance reminiscent of Houraiken's proper oversoul. Seta swiveled to his right. The burning weapon grazed his ribs, and he clutched the fresh wound with a howl.

"That's it, that's it," Hao coaxed. "Let that girl hear your pain; let her know just how much suffering her foolishness has caused."

Seta bit his tongue.

"_If you cry, they'll think of you as a disgrace. You can't even whimper…Be prepared for the worst pain imaginable."_

_Mom…_ He sharply inhaled through his teeth to silence himself. _I won't…I won't scream…You did your best to hide your pain – even as you died. As your son, as someone who wants to follow in your footsteps and be as great of a guard as you were, I won't give him the satisfaction of knowing I'm in pain! _Biting his lip, he glared up at Hao.

"Hm? What is it now?"

Seta said nothing. He solidified his stance and twirled the scythe to point the bladed end in his enemy's direction. "Come on."

Hao's smirk faded as he realized that the boy wouldn't be as weak as he had predicted. It would have been fun to torture him, but if he was going to refuse to cooperate, he would be quickly disposed of.

They were soon exchanging blows, very few of their attacks making contact. Hao gave the Ainu an upper cut. Seta hastily leaned out of the way, the jumped backward. Hao instantly transformed his oversoul into a Kwan Dao, then quickly performed a vertical shoveling, slashing motion. A crescent of fire launched from the gesture and surged toward the boy. With little time, Seta raised the scythe, then slammed the blade into the ground like a hoe. A small wall of ice erupted from the muddy surface. He knew it wouldn't hold; it was simply to buy time.

The attack broke through even more easily than he had assumed it would. All he could do was bring the scythe to cross in front of him, emitting a small arctic pulse to momentarily stop the fire. Using the backside of the bladed head, he golfed it into the sky. Not stopping, he charged at Hao. With a small cry of rage, he lunged, desperate to cause him the least bit of harm. Hao calmly lifted the oversoul to block him. Seta's eyes twitched as he felt it burning his skin. Still, he remained silent.

"You can't touch me with such a clumsy weapon."

"I know." He tugged at one of the straight handles that protruded from the long rod. It released, revealing a small knife. "I'll use this instead!" With his long arms, he reached over the burning shield and stabbed his friend's body as hard as he could.

Hao let out a pained yell. Seta took his cue to flip a safe distance away out of the immediate line of fire. He ledged the staff into the earth, then pulled on the upper portion. It separated into five pieces, still held together by a strand of furyoku. He bent and took the final piece. Like his mother before him, he swung his arm across his body, causing the pieces to whip around and settle into a triangle formation around him. Seta extended his arms, his palms like crosshairs on his target.

Hao pushed his hand against the wound, trying to stop the bleeding. Unlike Tadashi, he couldn't heal himself – a spirit in a fragile, artificial body could be restored, but without healing techniques, a human body could not.

"**CIW AT PISKAN!"**

The pieces of the bo rushed at him. They seemed harmless at first, but they planted themselves into the ground around him. Ropes of furyoku shot out of each cylinder, binding Hao's arms to his sides. He struggled, but without the oversoul, which had dissolved when it was pierced by the bonds, it was fruitless.

He looked up to see Seta rushing at him. The Ainu's oversoul had now been formed around the piece he had held on to which he held in his hand. The head of Apollo was clear and visible, his teeth bare to show how ready he was to help his friend. Seta skidded to a stop, thrusting the oversoul forward.

"**YAYATTASA KORO!"**

A crossbow arrow-shaped blade launched, hitting his best friend at point blank range. The hit prompted a small explosion, creating a cloud of dust. Taking no chances, Seta backed away. Despite his hopes, he knew that it was unlikely that victory was his.

He looked back at Lien. "I haven't won yet. Just hold on. I'll make sure you get out of here safely."

"I wouldn't be making such bold statements if I were you."

He whipped around to meet a fist to the face. With the brute strength of the Tao heir at his disposal, Hao sent him flying. He slammed into a tree, but suppressed any sounds of pain. Narrowed red eyes glared up at the demon.

For the moment, Hao was abandoning his oversoul and instead choosing to best the boy as his host would have. His patience with the young shaman had been paper-thin since the beginning, but now it was non-existent. He grabbed his prey by the neck and raised him. Seta struggled, his hands grasping and scratching at Hao's. The fiend tightened his hold. He wanted to make him suffer as much as possible. He wanted to force him to abandon his vow of silence. That alone would be a victory.

He shook him a few times. "Are you still so confident? Or are you done wasting my time and agree to die like the dog you're named after?"

Seta managed a smile. "Not just yet."

His hand darted into his torn uniform. Hao watched as he produced yet another knife and stabbed him in the arm. He yelled and the Ainu wriggled from his grasp.

"Apollo!" The bear growled and his scythe rebuilt itself from the fragmented pieces. He waved his hand, doing away with the blade. _Maybe I can do this…Maybe I can get him back…_

He swung the staff, knocking Hao away. Hao struggled to form his oversoul, but Seta wouldn't let him. The boy's attacks were relentless, keen on not giving him any time whatsoever to prepare himself.

"You took my best friend!" he yelled as he hit him. "I don't even understand why people like you exist! I don't understand why you have to bring the world down with you!" He kicked him in the stomach, making him stumble. "But you won't take her! You're not taking anything else from me tonight, you bastard! I'LL KILL YOU BEFORE I LET THAT HAPPEN – EVEN IF REN _IS_ INSIDE YOU!"

He swung the rod upwards, hitting his enemy's chin and launching him across the clearing. Seta was taking deep breaths as he watched him land, his hands shaking from anger. It was such a new, scary feeling. He hardly ever got angry. It was because of that night – nothing about that night had been normal. It was impossible for him to stay his normal self after watching his family die right before his eyes.

_I'll do this. I'll get rid of him, then Lien and I can find Auntie Pin-Mei. I can still survive this!_

He gazed up as he heard the mud squish. Hao slowly stood, using his fist to wipe the blood from the side of his mouth. "Enough of this! I'm through playing games!" He grinned deviously. "I think it's fitting to allow a familiar technique finish you off, don't you think?"

Seta stood his ground, showing not an ounce of fear. He watched Hao raise Houraiken and thrust it into the ground.

"TOUGEN KYOU!"

A series of bladed weapons instantly sprouted from the ground, a wave of them rushing at the young Ainu. Seta quickly leaped out of the way, the attack continuing past him. When he looked up, Hao was still grinning.

"That may not be the best idea."

Seta froze.

"It may be her father's attack, but I doubt it discriminates."

Looking back, he could see that she was in the line of fire, doomed to fall victim to the malicious assault. He practically threw his weapon away, sprinting in an effort to reach Lien before the blades did. _Where can I put her so she'll be safe?_ A thick tree branch above caught his eye. He hoisted her onto it, frantically pushing her so she would sit up straight and not fall off. _Come on…Come on…Please! Stay up! Stay up! Sta-!_

There was a sick squishing sound mixed with the crushing of bone. He looked down to see that a blade had pierced him through the chest, effectively impaling him. His eyes trailed back to Lien before other blades stabbed his limbs, shoulder, and stomach. Despite the pain, he still refused to cry out. With the last of his strength, he slowly reached for her.

_Please…Someone…Protect Lien…Please…_ His vision was fading in and out, as if he were merely nodding off to sleep. His heart pounded furiously with the anxiety of knowing he had failed, that nothing was stopping Hao from taking her soul. Now his vision blurred as tears fell down his cheeks. _Please…Someone…Lien…_

Hao grinned as he watched the young Ainu's body go limp. The illusioned weapons faded and disappeared, allowing it to fall to the ground. Mere moments later, Lien teetered off the branch, landing on top of her defender. Satisfied, Hao began making his way over to them to collect his prize.

"So noble, and yet simply another pathetic fool," he said, stepping on Ren's body as he advanced. "Had he stopped to think for a moment he would have realized that I wouldn't have allowed the attack to harm my sacrificial lamb. Her soul is useless to me if the body is dead."

He reached down and picked Lien up by the neck. Despite her fall and undoubtedly less-than-soft landing, she showed no signs of consciousness.

"It's a shame that you can't be awake for this, Tao Lien. I assure you that this will most certainly be the painful experience of your life, whatever little of it is left; I'm sure the voice that summoned me is also capable of some wonderful screams."

He raised his hand in front of her chest, getting ready to reach in.

Suddenly, a knife stabbed the back of his hand. He dropped Lien just as another soared through the air and jabbed into his shoulder. Enraged, he yanked out the dagger in his hand and threw it into the mud, then removed the other. The red tint of the blade caught his eye, and he examined it more closely. It was glowing like a smith's iron – it had been heated just before it was thrown.

His rage only increased when he noticed that Lien had been scooped up right under his nose. He spun around to see her being carefully placed in the strong, thick branch of a tree, this time with little chance of her falling. After stroking her cheek and giving her a quick kiss on the forehead, her savior jumped down and brandished more knives in each of his hands

Hao grinned angrily. "I knew I should have taken your entire pathetic soul when I had the chance."

Tadashi closed his eyes with a small smirk, then focused on the foe in front of him. "That's one of very few things I'm thankful for when it comes to you."

"And yet it's because of me that you're here."

"Unfortunately, yes."

Hao narrowed his eyes. "'Unfortunately'?"

"This second life of mine never should have happened. There shouldn't even be a need for it." Tadashi clenched the weapons tighter. "If I could, I'd go back in time and stop myself from pulling the trigger. If I could, I'd go back and punch myself in the face. Even if I failed, I'd go and tell myself to sit in Hell and serve my sentence with no desire for revenge. If I had, we might not be here right now."

"You place too much importance in yourself. Even without you, my plan would have proceeded." He shot him a venomous glare. "And yet I wasted the effort to revive you, you ungrateful human."

The young man gave a small smile. "I'm not entirely ungrateful. Because I came back, I met the Taos. I met Lien. I was able to feel love again and have fun just one more time. It was wonderful, and something I'll always remember. So really, thanks for that."

Hao didn't seem pleased by this.

"I fucked up with Xue. I had a wonderful relationship and I threw it all away over a lie. I tried to make Lien happy, and I helped bring this on. If I had just let Ren take her home like he begged me to, I wouldn't need to deal with this. I won't let you take Lien, no matter what!"

His master sighed and created an oversoul. "I would have expected that you wouldn't be foolish enough to oppose me after seeing what happened to the others who did. No matter. You've served your purpose, so I think it's time to dispose of the worn tool."

Tadashi didn't know anything but determination as he readied himself. He had a mission. A quest. He wouldn't relent until his princess was safe.

_It doesn't matter what happens to me. As long as Lien wakes up and is her old self again, then there's still hope!_

Above him in the tree next to Lien's, a tall shadow stood on an adjacent branch. Its right leg was slightly bent, the tip of its animal skin boot tapping on the bark to a silent beat. A thick chain wrapped around the figure's right hand repeatedly in an effort to shorten its incredible length. The left hand held onto the remaining trail of metal. The palms of both hands were burned to the second degree, covered in scars from long ago that had no chance of healing.

On the end of the chain was a heavy, metal urn. Sweet fumes emitted from the slit openings near its top. After gently swinging it while surveying the battle that was about to begin below, it was rested on the branch. The figure gently reached down and turned the urn's gold-plated lid to close it and block the small trails of smoke from escaping any further. She straightened, her gaze focused on Tadashi.

"I was promised that you would grow up to be a man that I could be proud of."

Tap. Tap.

"Come, show me how gallant and knightly my little prince can be."

She smiled.

"My precious Yuntaku."


	93. Tadashi's Last Joust

You'll be happy to know that chapter 95 is basically written, so the wait for that won't be very long. Sorry that I couldn't be quicker with this.

**Notes: A "yuta" is a shaman of the Ryukyuan tribe. They're very important to the village and are traditionally women.**

**"Imouto", if your fangirl Japanese is lacking, means "younger sister".**

******Disclaimer: The anime/manga **_**Shaman King**_** and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks**  


* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Three: Tadashi's Last Joust**

* * *

She stopped, her eyes widening in horror. She whipped her head to look in the opposite direction, then took a few steps.

"My Lady, what is wrong? Do you feel something?"

She shook her head.

"That's the problem...I don't."

* * *

Tadashi could feel himself tense under Hao's gaze – even if it was really the young Tao's gaze targeting him. The first phase of his plan had been carried out; Lien was out of harm's way for the time being, and he could concentrate on buying enough time to revive her. In order to succeed, he needed to make sure Hao was distracted long enough so he could being the process, and still long enough to complete it. He tried to wipe it from his mind. He now understood that it didn't matter if he said it in his head or if he screamed it out loud, it was all the same. If he thought about it, Hao would become aware of his intentions, and his efforts would be for nothing.

"What do you plan to fight me with, Tadashi?" Hao jeered. "I took back most of my power when I came here. Even a large piece of your soul belongs to me as well. What do you have?"

Tadashi knew he was right. He no longer had the Spirit of Fire's power, and he had no other spirit ally. But really, it made no difference; it didn't matter how, but he had to accomplish his goal. His retort came in the form of a hot flying dagger.

Hao used the back of his hand to swat it away. "Is this your idea of a joke?"

Tadashi just glared at him, trying to think of the most random things he possibly could. Lien's piano playing came to mind, and he frantically dismissed her. Even one thought of her would be a betrayal.

"Fine, die like a dog, then."

Tadashi narrowly avoided an undoubtedly mortal wound with a sidestep. He spun to face him again. If he was going to survive long enough to revive Lien, Hao needed to be in eyesight at all times. In spite of his efforts, it soon became clear to Tadashi that this lethal variation of dodgeball, or rather, dodgeblade, couldn't go on forever. He was getting tired, and no closer to success.

A hard kick hit his solars, and he sailed across the clearing, landing near a distinct roughness. It wasn't until he sat up that he realized what it was. Stiffly, he turned his head to see Xue's blackened corpse. He flinched. Even thought it had been his wish to kill her, now that he understood what her feelings had been, and why she had seemingly turned her back on him, he wanted nothing more than to bring her back, to see her smile again – even if it wasn't for him. It was just one more reason to keep fighting.

Ignoring the pain in his side, he got to his feet. With little hesitation, he ran at Hao with knives drawn. He swiped at him multiple times, but couldn't make contact. Hao's oversoul was overwhelmingly large compared to his small daggers, and also had the furyoku attacks to back it up. The red jouster was thrust at him. He quickly moved his head away. The spear-like OS missed him by centimeters. The heat resonated from it, so much that his cheek burned. The OS burst into flames. Hao swung it so it rammed Tadashi in the neck and sent him to the ground a few meters away.

Tadashi shuddered in pain. _At least I'm still alive enough to feel it._ A shadow cast over him as he tried to push himself up.

"What a pathetic fool," Hao sneered. Tadashi slowly looked up at him, worn and gasping for clean air. "Your resilience is so conceited."

The young man's eyes narrows. "How do you figure that?"

Hao pointed the fiery edge at him. "You seem to misunderstand something. The first time your life ended, it was by your own hand. It was your decision. You chose when you wanted to die."

A shiver went down Tadashi's spine.

"You don't have that authority now. I'm the one who decided to give you 'life' again; I'm the one who will decide when your life is over."

He swallowed. As Hao lunged at him again, he rolled out of the way, staggering to his feet. He quickly produced his iron harisen, then tried his best to parry. Even with a slightly longer weapon, it was hard to deflect the oversoul away from him. He tried to bat it out of the way, but Hao blocked each attempt. Being made of iron, the harisen wasn't exactly light. With every desperate swing, his arms felt heavier and heavier.

Hao could see that the once vengeful spirit didn't have much time left. He stabbed him in the right shoulder, the flames burning the skin and the fabric around the newly pierced wound. He forcefully yanked it out, coaxing blood to spurt and his victim to fall forward.

Tadashi caught his balance, looking up to see Hao pull back for another thrust.

"Your second life is at an end."

Just as he was about to complete the attack, he felt a sharp, distinct spike in furyoku. He whipped his head toward its source. His gaze immediately fell on Lien, who was more than visible from her perch, but still unconscious.

At first, Tadashi paused, unable to detect what his former master was feeling, but tossed it to the wind. He couldn't ignore the opening he had been given. He pulled back and swung his harisen upward, launching Hao a few feet in the air. Jumping up after him, he took out two knives and stabbed them through Hao's shoulders. His weight sent them both crashing to the ground, but Hao, being on the bottom, took the brunt of the fall.

When they landed, Tadashi looked up in mild surprise that his ad-lib attack had worked. Then he forced the knives as far in as he could, trying to reach the ground. When they would move no more, he scampered up and into the tree to Lien. There was not a second to waste.

He put his hand on her shoulder. "This had better work." His eyes softened. "Princess, just make sure you get out of this alive."

He placed his right hand on his chest. He inhaled in anticipation of the pain he was about to inflict on himself, then forced it into himself. A small gasp of agony escaped him, but he caught it and held it in. After a few moments, he slowly pulled the hand back out, now holding what looked like a bright, yet pale blue ball of flames. He looked at it, panting, before looking at her.

"This is going to sting. Just bear with me, Princess."

He thrust his hand into her chest, careful not to touch her breasts as he did so. When he could feel a small warmth similar to the one he held in his hand, he released it. Unable to see inside of her, all he could do was trust that the two souls would merge smoothly. He jerked his hand back out, then watched her expectantly.

Nothing happened.

His tired eyes trailed down to the branch. It had only been an idea, a hunch. He thought that maybe if she had more of a soul, even if it wasn't entirely hers, she could move, try to save herself. But he knew next to nothing about this shamanic world the people around him were so accustomed to. What could an outsider like him to do help, anyway?

"Give it time."

He jerked his head up and searched for where the voice had come from. "Who's there?"

She ignored his question. "What you have done is unconventional, but workable. She won't become you, of course. When her soul is restored, it will become nothing more than an awkward Hyoi Gattai. I'm sure she'll have no trouble relinquishing your soul."

His vision was blurring. He had given Lien most of the soul he had left in his body, and he felt like he was close to dying…again. This time was so much more painful, not the quick finish he had enjoyed before.

A blast of fire swept past him. He slowly turned to see Hao, bloody and consumed by rage. Tadashi shuffled back to face Lien.

"Princess, it looks like my time is up," he said with a small smile. He leaned in and kissed her. His eyes widened as he realized that he couldn't feel her lips against his own. He touched them as he leaned back, but tried keep smiling. "Just promise me that you'll survive, alright? Too many people have died trying to prevent Hao from taking your soul. It just wouldn't be right if you went and died anyway."

He closed his eyes. "Hey, Ms. Voice…I don't know who or what you are, but can you look after her for me? I know that if she wakes up, she'll have a chance of making it out of here alive."

Silence.

"I make no promises," the voice said, trying to keep itself from trembling, "but I will try."

He smiled. "Thanks."

With that, Tadashi leapt down from the tree to face Hao. "Okay, I'm done now." He chuckled. "Or is it well done? I guess we'll find out, won't we?"

Hao said nothing. He raised his hand, and the Spirit of Fire unleashed another stream of flames. Tadashi closed his eyes, his smile still present.

_I know I fucked up, guys, to put it mildly. I'm sorry. I tried to make things right. I'm sorry I couldn't do more._

The fire ate away at the artificial body, leaving a flickering soul in its wake. His movements quick and sharp, Hao advanced, fully intent on taking the small snack being offered to him. But just as he was reaching for it, a chain looped around his arm, preventing him from grasping the soul. He followed the chain's length with his eyes, down to the woman that had jumped down to stop him.

Her stance was staggered, her legs bent but not quite in a kneeling position. He could see the animal hide that made up her boots as well as her shirt, which was dyed peachy color. Her hair was tied in a low clip near its end which kept most of it out of her face. She slowly looked over her shoulder at him, her grey eyes like daggers.

"Leave him be. He is no longer your concern."

Before he could protest, she freed her right hand from the chain. As her left grabbed the slack, she whipped her free hand out to capture the near powerless soul and trap it in a jeweled medallion that hung around her neck.

Hao allowed his arm to drop. "Yet another interloper? Such pests…"

She stood, giving a sharp tug to take back her chain. "Don't misunderstand. I have no stake in that girl or her family. My reason for being here is much more…" Her hand went to touch her pendant. "…Personal."

He ignored her, choosing to advance toward the final ingredient he needed. She ran and blocked his path. Though she showed no hint of fear, he knew that she was not so naive as to think that she had a chance of defeating him.

"I'm not done talking to you," she said in a threatening tone. "I may not care about that girl, but because 'he' does, I have to look after her for the time being. Also, I just really, really hate you. I hate someone else, too, but since he's not here, I hope you don't mind if I take my rage over him out on you."

"I believe the proper course of action would be to take your human problems out on humans."

She clenched the chains tighter. "But I won't because I don't make innocent people suffer for the way others have wronged me." Her eyes narrowed even more. "Or how they've hurt my child." She tapped her toe on the ground. "You called him a human, but you must have been able to sense that he had some furyoku buried deep inside him. So deep that not even he himself was aware of it. You took advantage of him, but in a worse way than he himself knew."

She gracefully used the tip of her boot to move the lid of the urn, coaxing the sweet fumes forth once more. "I concede that I am merely a distraction. However, now that I finally have my son back, now that I know it is impossible for me to hold him in my arms, there is nothing left for me here. Those you have already killed wished to defeat you while still preserving their own lives. I have no such desire."

"And yet, your furyoku level pales in comparison to Ren's. What do you hope to accomplish here?"

She whipped her arm around, yanking the urn up, then allowing it to sway back and forth on its leash. "I am going to suffocate this fire of yours with my own. You see…" A rust colored energy engulfed the urn. "When I returned to my village, I was desperate for a way to locate my son. The yuta, though she scolded me for running away, offered guidance. She allowed me to perform rites alongside her. Having so much to do almost made me forget why I had come back in the first place.

"The Ainu have the bear. We, the Ryukyuan, have fire. The fire god guards the hearth, sends messages, and is even more important to us than our ancestors. For the past twenty years, I have sought his help in finding my son. Now, he has led me here. It was your Spirit of Fire that attracted him. Apparently, he knows a lot about you, Hao, especially your use of the Spirit of Fire. I will have you know, he is not pleased with the way you are using fire to destroy."

Hao was unfazed. After all these years, did she expect him to suddenly fee remorse for using such a powerful spirit? "And what does the hearth spirit plan to do about it?"

She placed her hand on the urn's cover. "He's telling me to do anything and everything in my power to hinder your progress." She opened it, the lid hinged to the side of it. "That young man you're possessing really does have a beautiful face. It saddens me to have to damage it."

Before he could react, she reached in, took a fistful of cinders and tossed them in his eyes. He closed them, but they still succeeded in blinding him. She rushed past him. It wasn't even worth attempting to fight him. She knew that. Instead, she would work on slowing him down. The portion of Tadashi's soul that he feasted on previously wouldn't sustain him forever. If he was weak enough, Tadashi could maybe recover it and Lien, were she to wake up, could have a chance of defeating him.

She darted to the right. Sliding to a stop a few meters away from him, she took out a piece of charcoal and slammed it into the ground. She ran until she was a few feet away from him, his back to her. Her hands were shaking as she reached into the urn again.

She could feel the exact moment that he finally cleared his eyesight and glared at her. Her muscles tensed. She froze. With a deep breath, she put another piece of charcoal into the ground.

Hao gave a wave of his arm, and the Spirit of Fire resumed its attack. She reluctantly skidded past the next planting point to evade it. The spirit eventually had to recoil and prepare the next blast, and she used the opportunity backtrack and place a third marker in the ground.

Hao had seen what she was doing, but was just a second too late in his attempt to foil her. Nonetheless, he took satisfaction in the hit that came just after her small victory. He had aimed for the shoulder of her dominant arm and made contact. This would no doubt hinder her attempt to put the last charcoal in place.

As she saw more fire headed in her direction, she made a desperate attempt to jump behind him, hoping to either deter the fire or take him with her. The spirit was powerful, but it didn't have the ability to zigzag the fire anywhere it was commanded to. To her relief, it was called off.

He turned to her angrily. "This is the last time I'll—"

The urn was smashed on top of his head. She escaped. Reaching her point, she turned to face him. True to form, the hard-headedness that the heir had inherited from his father made her last attack less effective, only causing him to stagger as opposed to knocking him out. As he regained his balance, she took out the last piece and forced it deep into the mud. After a Ryukyuan command, restraints from the four markers formed and captured him. At first they only bound his body, but a quick phrase sacrificed one of the chains and covered his mouth, preventing him from giving his spirit any verbal commands.

She let out a sigh of relief. He was already showing signs of sluggishness due to her son's spirit being so undeniably weak and lacking a formidable source of furyoku. It was the only reason why his capture had been in the least bit possible. After all, how else could she accomplish something that others much more powerful than her could not?

She turned and ran to where she had grouped the bodies of the fallen. Now would be her only chance. She began swinging the urn on its chain. Furyoku engulfed it, and she twirled it the way a gymnast would do with a ribbon. Though her mouth was dry, she tried her hardest to recite the chant.

"Ones thought to have left this world, heed my words; I give you but one chance to live! Have you the will, I will sacrifice my life for yours! I am without the ability to heal, so you must endure the wounds that aided your passing…You have little time, so pray that she may reach you!"

Tap tap.

"Souls! Hear the pleas of your bodies! Your business is unfinished – you cannot leave yet! Though it is your will that determines the outcome, have sympathy for those who need you!"

She unscrewed the top of the urn to reveal a container of ash. She picked it up and spun herself, spreading them on top of the bodies. When it was done, she stopped and surveyed them. It was suddenly harder to breathe, an effect of the dance.

_Yes…with this…if someone can heal them, then…_

She was yanked back by her long hair, and Houraiken was at her throat. It had cost her to bind his mouth instead of a limb – it would have given her more time.

"You should know that what you just did is fruitless. It will at least be another hour until that woman shows up. I'll have destroyed those bodies by then."

She kept still, but tried to get him to let go of her midsection. "It doesn't matter." She grinned. "Didn't I tell you that I have no will to live anymore? Killing me solves nothing."

He was silent for a moment. "Ah, that's right. That fool Tadashi was your son."

"Yuntaku. His name is Yuntaku," she slowly corrected. He pressed the blade closer to her neck, drawing blood.

"You seemingly hate me for giving him another chance at life, but you think I should bear the burden of your revenge against that human father of his?"

"What else should I do?"

"Lament running away from your tribe. Had you not given in to the stereotype of a rebellious teenager, you could have lived in peace."

She struggled minimally. "I…had to leave. I couldn't stand my heritage. I needed to live somewhere I could think and experience a 'normal' life. I turned away from the elders who wanted me to participate in the Shaman Fight. I couldn't commit to that."

"But…" He paused to gather the story. "An affair with the only teacher who wouldn't shun you? Is that really what a human would consider a 'normal life'? You committed to that and suffered the consequences."

"I have no regrets…not when it comes to giving birth to my son," Aika whispered. "The only regret is that I didn't find him sooner. Your idiocy of using the Spirit of Fire is what led me here. I had felt my son previously, but it was the Spirit of Fire that pinpointed your location."

"That 'idiocy' is going to kill you as opposed to myself."

"Go ahead and kill me, you disgraceful fire shaman."

"Gladly. You're one less obstacle after all. But first-"

"Ni…Niisama?"

They both jerked their heads up. Lien was trying to climb down from the tree she had been in. She looked immeasurably tired. Inevitably, she lost her footing and fell to the ground. With a moan, she began to push herself up. She looked up at her brother with puppy dog eyes, wondering why he wasn't running to help her. She looked away, then finally stood. Holding her arm, she made her way over to them.

Aika, wide-eyed, tried to flail and shoo her away. "Don't come over here! He'll-!"

Hao glared at her, deciding whether or not he should try to casually slit her throat. He ultimately decided against it, knowing that even with her mind in a fog, Lien would more than likely notice a bloody corpse falling over. Instead, he roughly shoved her to the ground, easily masked as a desperate attempt to reach the girl.

Reluctantly, he wrapped his arms around her. He'd have to fake it. "Thank the gods you're safe."

She felt relieved to finally be in her brother's arms. "What's going on?" she whispered. "Everything was so dark…I felt like I was dying. I kept hearing voices. I didn't know what to do." She was shaking. She looked up at him. "N-Niisama…can we go home now?"

He paused, grinning over her shoulder. "Of course, _imouto_."

Her teary eyes flew open. "I…mou…" She pushed him away. "Y-You're not Niisama…" She said shakily. "Even though I call him Niisama, h-he calls me mèimei! Not imouto!"

Hao sighed. "Easy mistake. If only that fool had let me get into his mind, I wouldn't have slipped up like that."

Her eyes widened. She glanced around and saw the assortment of bodies. "H-Hey…Is that…?"

She spotted her father.

"P-Papa? What happened?" She went to run to him, but was stopped. She froze as her chest was slashed, blood spurting everywhere. Aika staggered to her feet as Hao stood over the bewildered girl.

"It doesn't matter if you've woken up," he said menacingly. "You're so small that you shouldn't even attempt to fight back.

"Tao Lien, you're finally mine."


	94. I Couldn't Have Done It Without You

Hark, what is this? Less than a month? Is it the apocalypse? Was the Mayan calendar a year off? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?

This is me writing at school, that's what.

If you're into that sort of thing, a smut version of "A Foolish Offering" is now on AFF. Also, on DeviantArt you can read a scene that was deleted from chapter 92. Also-also, I have resumed work on _Tao Yi Gaiden_, despite the fact that it's been three years (ahaha…eh…). However, unlike here, I will be stockpiling chapters and releasing them when I'm nearing the conclusion. Ah, the bliss of writing something where the outcome is already set in stone…

Anyway, as I said before, 95 is already pretty much finished, aside from me restructuring the end. This chapter is rather short, but the next one is already 11 pages. So yay for that.

Also, in 95, Lien will drop the Idiot Ball she's currently carrying.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the anime/manga**_**Shaman King.**_** The story****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Four: "I Couldn't Have Done It Without You"**

* * *

Lien stared up into her brother's eyes. Surely this was another nightmare. There was no way that her twin would ever want to harm her, much less kill her.

"'Kill' you? No, of course not," Hao said matter-of-factly.

She flinched, realizing the ability he had.

"I can't kill you. Your soul needs to be fresh. A soul from a dead body lacks the necessary vitality that the ritual demands." He sneered. "But once I begin the process of taking your soul from your body, you'll be wishing I_ had_ killed you."

She inched away, her eyes rapidly shifting between Hao and the bodies behind him. He allowed it, knowing that she was incapable of outrunning him. Her eyes still on him, she stood and stumbled over to them.

It was horrifying. Ren's skin was pale. The little warmth it still possessed was more haunting than anything else and had done absolutely nothing to ease her surprise. Her father was the strongest person she knew. The thought of him losing was unfathomable.

"P-Papa…" she said softly.

Her voice carried a tone similar to that of her younger years, when she would furtively awaken him to defend her from the bad dream she'd had. He would wake up, reassure her, then walk her back to her room. With a small sigh and a gentle pat on the head, like hypnotism, she would instantly fall back to sleep.

She never had to touch him to wake him up. He was always so alert that she used to wonder if he slept at all. But now, her hand shaking, she reached over and shook his shoulder.

"Papa…wake up…I need you…please wake up…"

Aika stood over her. "He's dead."

Lien whipped around to look at her, it never occurring to her to ask who she was. She swallowed and turned back to see Seta's body. Frantic, she shook him as well, calling his name.

"He's gone. They all are."

Lien stood, her face pale. She took a few steps, then leaned against a nearby tree, staring out into the forest. "When…When did this happen? How could they all be beat?"

"They died trying to save you. Your father stood and fought until his legs gave out. I'm sure some of his last thoughts were of you."

"Where is Niisama? Where did he go?"

Aika closed her eyes in pity. "He's right behind you."

Lien whirled around, hoping to see the brother she knew and loved with his hand out to take her away from this mess. But it was the same person who had given her the wound she was unable to nurse.

She shook her head. "No…I refuse…to believe…" Her head was spinning. Nothing was making sense.

"Your brother is gone, Lien. You're the only one left who can stop this," Aika said quietly.

The words sunk in. _She_ had to stop this? How? If her father wasn't able to win against him…what chance did she have? She covered her mouth and turned, falling to her knees and letting go of the sickness that had built inside her.

The woman turned her head away for a few moments, but then stood over her once more.

"Get up."

Lien looked over her shoulder at her with forlorn eyes.

Aika yanked her up by her collar and slapped her across the face. "GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF! Are you even aware of how much of this is because of you and your selfishness?"

The heiress's eyes widened. "W-What do you mean?"

She heaved a sigh. "I'm not sure on the specifics, since much of my knowledge only came from the fire, but I know that your naivety and lust brought things to this point. NO ONE would be out here if you hadn't trusted that stupid legend fed to you by Hao's servant!" She bowed her head. "If it wasn't for you, my son wouldn't have suffered as much as he did…" Her hand went to the medallion, the jewel flashing. "Even now, he still wants what's best for you, and the only thing I can do to make up for not being there for him is fulfill that wish." Her head snapped up. "Personally, I don't care about a spoiled silver-spoon girl like you. But he does…So you better succeed!"

Lien's eyes by this point were so filled with horror that her pupils were tiny dots on plains of white. "M-Me…? This is…" She slowly looked over at her father, then to the Usuis. "…my fault?"

Aika seethed. "If you honestly think Hao is going to wait for you to get your bearings so you can oppose him, you're delusional! Stop crying, and start fighting!"

But at the revelation of who her opponent was, Lien was all the more afraid. The words of her father and brother flooded back to her.

"_Hao is…the worst type of shaman. Yoh always said that a bad person can't see spirits, but I disagree in this case. That man is pure evil."_

"…_Father admitted that there were times when he was afraid, though he never made it apparent to anyone else."_

"_If we hadn't killed him, none of us would be here right now."_

"_If he were to be resurrected now, I'm not sure if we'd be able to defeat him…even with Father."_

"_**He has no respect for human lives – killing is nothing to him."**_

She shivered. "I-I-I want to wake up now…" she whispered. "Where's Mama? Can't she do something? Ma-!"

The woman angrily dropped her. "Silence yourself."

Lien cringed.

"You seem to have a lot of respect for your father. Is that true?"

She nodded hastily.

"What do you think he would say if he saw you here like a sniveling crybaby? Hm? Would he pat you on the head and praise what a coward you are? Or would he tell you what a disappointment you are?"

She froze, her eyes wide. Her father's opinion of her meant everything. Pin-Mei could find the bright side of any fault she had, but Ren wasn't so forgiving.

A year or two ago, she had tried out for a play her school was putting on. She had been given a supporting role that included a solo, a role that had been the envy of most of the girls of her class. The day the cast was announced, some of her classmates berated her, telling her that it hadn't been her, but another girl, whose name with very sloppy handwriting could be mistaken for hers, who was supposed to have the role. She shrugged it off, but the harassment continued. It became next to unbearable. Not even her brother could quell the tempest of jealousy created by the girls.

The day of the first rehearsal, she feigned a cold and went home, not wanting to deal with the wrath of her castmates. When she got in, Ren had glanced at the schedule she had slapped onto the wall previously and questioned why she hadn't gone.

"_Oh…Well…Some of the girls say that my name got mixed up and that the role belonged to another girl. I'm…going to quit so she can have it."_

He nodded slowly, then went to pass her.

"_You're giving up just because you're meeting with resistance? Because some people are jealous, if not fearful of what you're capable of? …__**How disappointing**__."_

His words had stabbed her. So much so that she bolted back to school, the rehearsal half over, and demanded that she be given the sheet music for her part. She endured the harassment, and the show went on.

Her efforts made that pat on her head after the finale all the more satisfying. But he never took back his words.

_He's never said "I'm proud of you." He said that Niisama and I are his "pride and joy"…but that's not the same…I haven't done anything for him to be proud of. If Papa were here…he…_

She stood, wiping her eyes. _He wouldn't cry._ _He'd have a confident smirk on._

She looked around. Aika held out the Kwan Dao that had been next to Ren's body. She took it.

_He'd get into position._ She chose a form and took it.

_He'd fight._

Hao sneered. "You honestly think that you have a chance? You'll defeat me where your father failed?"

_He's right. What do I have that my father doesn't? Why the heck should I be able to win?_

"The answer is right before your eyes, Lien."

"Right before my eyes?" She concentrated, mulling over Aika's words. As the realization dawned on her, her whole body tensed.

Aika nodded. "That's it. There's also something your father left for you. If you can somehow use it, he wants you to have it." The girl's eyes wandered, as if trying to figure out what it was. "Just remember one thing: No matter what Hao does to you, he's not going to kill you. The worst that could happen is that you get knocked out. At that point, I'll step in and try to revive you, but I can't make any promises."

Lien nodded.

"Now wipe it from your mind. If you're not careful, your thoughts will betray you."

Sweat was already pouring down her face. It was still too much. The last time she had tried to stand on her own and fight, she was overcome and almost defiled for her failure – and that had been against humans. How could she ever hope to take him on all by herself?

"You can't. It's impossible." He waited for a moment. "_He's right…I can't even beat Niisama when we're sparring. I've never even __**tried**__ fighting him with furyoku!_" He laughed. See, even you realize how futile it is. Make all of this easier for the both of us and just—"

Without warning, Lien rushed at him. He showed mild surprise, but easily blocked her.

"Are you thinking that if you cloud your thoughts I won't be able to read your movements?" He smirked when she remained silent. "You know what the outcome will be, regardless of how hard you try. Your thoughts have said as much."

Her gaze didn't waver. She had a new train of thought. As Hao read them, his grin melted into a scowl. He lunged at her, knocking her away. She recovered, then continued her vicious stare.

"Stop it," he commanded.

Visions of the twins were flooding the girl's mind. They were full of light, the scenes bright and full of happiness. The twins laughed together, ate together, slept together, and consoled each other. It sickened him.

"Stop it!" he yelled, knocking her down again. The scenes steadily faded, still faintly visible in the background. He detached himself, unable to stand it any longer. His head was pounding.

Lien slowly got to her feet. _Am I getting through? Can I reach Niisama? It's true that physically I don't stand a chance, but if I can defeat Hao from the inside, it's the same thing, right? If Niisama is still in there, it's possible that his feelings can break through and he can stop this!_

"I don't even need to read your mind to know what you're trying to do," Hao snapped, finally stabilizing his breathing. "It's just more foolishness. Another wasted effort! Give it up. I wouldn't be inside this body if his soul was still here. I consumed it! He's gone! Just give it up and submit yourself!"

"I don't believe you."

He glared at her.

"I can still feel him…" She put her hand over her heart. "I'm his twin…I know…I can feel the warmth that I've always felt from him." She took another stance. "Until that warmth is obliterated, I'll keep fighting. Even then, I'll fight you for as long as I need to. I wouldn't be able to look Papa in the eye otherwise."

"You can feel him? Impossible. It's not as if you can-,"

"How would you know?"

He paused. She glared at him.

"How the hell could _you_ possibly understand what it's like to be a twin? How could you _ever_ hope to comprehend the closeness between two siblings like that? To know what the other is thinking without any sort of telepathy? To feel such a connection that you couldn't possibly live without them – that half of you would die if they did?"

"SHUT UP!"

She flinched. No matter how brave she was trying to be, it didn't change the fact that Hao still terrified her.

He lowered his head so she couldn't see his eyes. "Ignorant child…Carrying on as if you know what you're talking about. You don't know a single thing about me, and you have your father to blame for that. You are in absolutely no place to be making assumptions!"

Lien blinked, then tilted her head. "Are you trying to say…that you have a twin?"

Hao answered with a cold, murderous stare, reluctant to admit it. It had been an embarrassing mistake to have to deal with being split in two in his most recent incarnation.

She thoughtfully put her index finger to her chin. "Wow…I never expected that." She squinted at him, then folded her arms in thought. Finally, she hit her right palm with the bottom of her left fist. "Oh! I get it! Yeah! _You're Yoh's twin!_ Papa said you were related to him, and now I see how!"

Hao looked less and less amused by each revelation and observation made by the girl.

"Oh…" she said in a small voice. "That's so sad…"

He could feel his rage building. "Are you attempting to pity me over something?"

She looked at him as if she were staring into the eyes of an abandoned puppy. "Yoh never even mentioned you, so I didn't realize you were twins until now…It's like he's abandoned you…Forgotten about you…How can you survive without your twin? To know that your twin doesn't even mourn you, bad guy or not, now that you're gone…It's almost like…_your existence wasn't even necessary_…like there should have only been one of you from the very beginning…"

At the last statement, he snapped. He had to shut her up. He didn't even bother to form a plan of how to do so without killing her. If she did happen to die, he would just force the Ryukyuan to revive her.

Lien looked at the ground. _I almost feel sorry for him…Ren and I are so close...I couldn't imagine life without him, or him not caring if I was gone…I always felt like I was the unwanted twin…but at least my twin would mourn me if I was dead…_

"Watch out!" called Aika.

She looked up just in time to see Hao lift Houraiken. He gave an upwards slash, the sheer force of it lifting her off the ground. Still in the air, he grabbed her throat and slammed her into the ground. She screamed, her cry trailing off until it became a string of heavy pants. It was the only thing she could do to deal with the pain.

Hao took a couple deep breaths, the grinned, satisfied that the girl was no longer to smart mouth him. She tried to get up, but he quickly stomped on her sternum, forcing her back down again.

"Are you finished with your smug attitude, Tao Lien? I may have had a twin, but unlike you, we didn't need each other, and we certainly didn't turn into quivering messes when we were separated. Your situation is that of a fairytale. Stop acting as if you know how all twins should act. You know nothing."

For a few moments, all that could be heard was Lien's crying and choked breathing. Hao just continued to stare down at the heiress, her eyes closed and eyelids twitching as she waited for the pain to go away.

_Now would be a good time…_

"Give him back…"

"Hm? What did you say?"

She slowly opened her eyes, though she could barely see him through her tears. "Give back my Niisama…Give him back…"

He sneered, amused by her fruitless pleas.

"What did he ever do to you? How could he have done anything to make you do something like this to him?" she whispered.

"You're acting as though I need a reason to carry on with this." When she stared up at him, he laughed. "What I'm saying is that this has little to do with you personally. Really, any children of the five warriors would have done nicely."

She was biting her lip. Part of her wanted to ask why – why Ren and not one of the other children? But she held her tongue. To ask such a thing would be like wishing this pain on Seta or Hana, something she couldn't possibly do.

"I put a lot of effort into preparing this body for my revival. It couldn't be done all at once. I had to wait until the whelp was close to the breaking point before I could send that spirit out."

"B-But how? Niisama and I went through the same things at school…we were _both_ harassed by our classmates…Why did he break down when I didn't?"

Hao's eyes narrowed. "Oh, come now. You may be a sniveling crybaby now, but don't tell me you forget how proud you used to be. Don't you remember? You were almost as bad as those human children. Even after school ended for the day, he had to endure _your_ taunts, _your_ harassment, _your _violence, and there was no way for him to escape."

"But I don't…" She stopped. She felt sick again. The memories were coming back.

"_What a stupid thing to say. You're so dumb…"_

"_Can't you just act like a normal kid? What kind of freak reads when we have free time instead of playing? We wouldn't be made fun of so much if you weren't so weird!"_

"_Mama only loves you more because you look like Papa, or else she probably wouldn't care about you."_

"_Papa probably hates you because you can't drink milk like him, you know. It's your own fault."_

"_See? Mama and Papa decided you're not good enough to be head of the family, so they're having another baby to replace you! Haha!"_

Her chest hurt, and not because he was pressing his foot on it. She had totally forgotten about what she had put her brother through. She had been relentless in teasing him, practically mimicking their classmates and treating him as if, even among shamans, he wasn't "normal".

Deep down, she had known that being lactose intolerant wasn't his fault. In fact, Pin-Mei had reasoned that maybe something from her mother's side had brought it about. Nonetheless, it was a weak point in the little boy's heart. He had always felt inferior because of it, forever fearful that it had negatively affected how much his father loved him, when it couldn't have been farther from the truth.

The jealousy she had in presuming that her mother favored her brother over her, considering how she always tended to his wounds with such care – only noticeable when she came home with none – had caused her to say that he was loved by her for only shallow reasons. Furthermore, she had no way of knowing, due to their parents' neglect of the proper technology, whether the baby her mother had been carrying was a boy or a girl. It was her own insecurities that had led to such an insult.

Her entire body shook. She had only apologized when prompted to by her parents. They didn't even have any knowledge of the incidences she had just recounted, and there had been many, _many_ more that she dared not remember.

Hao titled his head, as if he found her horror adorable. He leaned down.

"But really, I have to thank you, Lien. It would have taken so much longer with just your classmates alone. Really, _I couldn't have done it without you_."

She rolled away, screaming. Her continuous faults were piling up, showing her how all of this had come to be. She felt dizzy as she slowly stood, looking around for some sort of comfort. Hao smiled. She was finally breaking.

Lien whirled around. "I'm…I'm sorry…" She looked up, her eyes crazed and frantic. "I'm sorry, Ren. I-If you can hear me, I'M SORRY!"

Hao laughed. "As if any of that matters now. It's not as if all my plans are ruined simply because you've realized how foolish you've been. That little boy has been gone for how many years now? And you suddenly miss him? Were you too busy falling in love with the dark side that I helped create?"

"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" she kept whispering.

"Well," he said, walking towards her. "It would seem that you've realized just how small you really are, Tao Lien."

Aika desperately ran at him, knowing that Lien was too frozen from the revelation to save herself. Seeing her out of the corner of his eye, he took out Houraiken and stabbed her in the stomach – not breaking his pace, nor blinking an eye. With one rough push, she was down.

Lien looked at him as he approached, trying to inch away. She knew that she had to get away, if only to find her mother, but she was heading in the completely opposite direction. Even as her brother opened his arms in an effort to bait her, she tried to sidestep closer to her home.

"St-Stay away…"

He grinned at her. "Like you said yourself, Lien. You and this body are two parts of a whole." His arms reached for her.

"NO!"

In a burst of adrenaline, she shoved his chest as hard as she could. He stumbled away slightly, but as overall unfazed by the worthless attack. Lien herself suffered recoil from the push, sending her backwards.

She slipped.

Looking down, she saw a quick glimpse of what looked like Seta's headband, which had been discarded by Rong after saving her. She didn't even have time to look where she was heading, nor to catch herself.

Hao, however, saw exactly what she was heading for and gave a weak attempt to grab her. It wasn't good enough, but it didn't bother him very much. After all…

Her head slammed against the large stone. She slumped against it, blood trailing down with her.

…it's much easier to catch a mouse when it can't run.


	95. Decision

The reason I always tried to accentuate Lien's appearance (which is hard to do without making her look like a Sue) is because I basically wanted her to look like what Ren may have if he had been born female. That's why she was so headstrong when she was a kid, as well.

This chapter, "Decision" is named for the Ayumi Hamasaki song of the same name. I chose it as one of Lien's image songs. If I can ever find the time, I'd like to do little profiles for everyone, at which time you would be able see that everyone, especially Ren and Pin-Mei, get a few.

I regret that I have nothing constructive or informative to say, aside from that the first eight pages were started last summer, so I hope that they reflect that much work. Enjoy!

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Five: Decision**

* * *

_My earliest memory...I think it's of Papa. Yeah...it's really foggy, but I remember him being there. I kind of forget what we were doing. I think I was just staring up at him like an idiot. The way someone might look up to a deity or something._

_My father is a god._

_No one could ever tell me otherwise. I'll never think any less of him, not for any reason. No matter if he killed someone. Hell, even a hundred people. I wouldn't care. Papa, to me, has always been perfection. I yearned for his acknowledgment. I wanted his attention._

_Ever since I was little, I've wanted to be as powerful, as intelligent, as majestic, as beautiful as he is._

_In that memory, I was four years old. I remember watching him walk down the hall, his arms folded, strolling in and out of the sunlight that streamed in through the windows. From around a corner, my eyes just couldn't leave him. Before I knew it, he had walked past me, stopping before choosing which wing he would walk toward next. He looked at me, like he found my early stages of voyeurism interesting._

"Lien, what are you doing?"

_I remember fumbling for an answer._

"Watching you, Papa."

"Oh?"

_My father doesn't smile half as much as my mother does. I really wish he did. I just want to know that he approves of the things I do._

"Lien, staring is quite rude. Hasn't Pin-Mei told you that?"

_I don't know why Papa used to call Mama by her given name when he was referring to her. If I had to guess, I think maybe it was because he didn't want to act like her name was "Mom" or "Mother". As Niisama and I got older, he eased into calling her those things._

_Mama said that when I was younger, I was obsessed with my father. She said she always thought it had something to do with how he and I look just a little more alike than he and Niisama do. She says that's kind of why Papa sometimes seems a little softer with me than with Niisama, too._

_It was such a strange relationship. I was scared of him, but at the same time, I loved him more than anything. I really did. The feeling in my heart, the anxiety and the happiness I felt when I saw him, is something I can't possibly forget. I honestly thought it was love, that I would marry him. _

_I'll never forget the day that I let it slip out of my mouth._

_Mama was sitting in the study, trying to mend one of Niisama's shirts, and I was following Papa around again. I was twirling around, talking about how I was going to be strong like him when I grew up._

"If you're so eager to be an adult, I suppose I should begin finding a fiancé for you."

"No, Papa! I wanna marry you instead!"

_He had paused, thinking it over. He told me no, that he already had a wife, and would not be taking another. I think he was trying to laugh it off in a sense, though he was finding it hard. I persisted. Before I knew it, Mama had knelt down in front of me._

"So you think he's wonderful too, don't you?"

_When I nodded, she tilted her head, her voice cold._

"Well, I suppose we'll have to fight for him then, won't we?"

_The look in her eyes made me drop the idea altogether. Papa said nothing. I don't blame him. What could he possibly say to her when she was like that? _

_That, coupled with his already cold demeanor, made me afraid of him again._

_My father terrified me. Even when he suppressed his power, I sometimes found it suffocating. I never understood why my brother was able to be in the same room with him and not get that same dizzy, helpless feeling I used to get. I had always thought I was stronger than him. I was so determined to prove that I had just as much power and resilience as my twin, if not more. Regretfully...I..._

"Shut up, dumb head!"

"Dumb, stupid wuss!"

"Stop crying, you big baby!"

_I became a bully. He was my older brother, and I pushed him around mercilessly. If he had been the brother I know today, he never would have let it happen. But since he was meek back then, he never complained. He never went out of his way to tell on me, either. He was still nothing but nice to me. It only pissed me off more._

_I can't even explain why I decided that hurting him was the best thing to do. Papa_ _was giving him all the attention because he was the rightful heir. He gradually began training him to be head of the family – testing him, scrutinizing his speech, his posture, his gait. Mama attempted to teach me how to be graceful, but sometimes it seemed like she was in need of a teacher just as much as I was. I longed for my father's attention. I didn't care if it meant that I had to learn to use a weapon, or even that I'd have to contend with my brother for the metaphorical throne. I just…wanted…_

"Here."

_I remember looking up at him when he finally handed the Kwan Dao to me for the first time. It was heavy. Even for plastic, it was heavy. But this…this was my crowning achievement. Not only was I allowed to hold it, he taught me for some time. My pride. My confidence. That night, everything I had been working for began to come together._

_All because of a curious brat's question:_

"Papa, why do you dance with that stick all the time?"

_I remember every movement he taught me. A mere six years old, and I remember everything. I can hardly remember things I'm told the day before, or things I see, I can't even recall five minutes later. But instances like that, when I have to move, I almost never forget the movement. The way I'm touched. If my stance is repositioned. I never forget those things._

_I remember tossing that piece of plastic into the sky, allowing it to spin. I remember catching it and smiling. I remember giggling and inflating my ego, telling myself that I was the best, no one could beat me. I remember saying those words out loud:_

"I'm Tao Lien! I won't be defeated by any of you weaklings!"

_I remember the birds hearing my battle cry and dispersing. I remember turning around._

_I remember seeing my father leaning against the armory._

"It's time to go inside."

_I remember him smiling._

_Despite that...I still wasn't the center of attention. Mom became pregnant, and I feared that I would be lost as the middle child. I kept running to my father, begging for training, just a few minutes time to remind him that I was there. Anything to make sure he wouldn't forget about me. Thinking back, I wonder how I must have looked, scurrying around and clinging to whoever would listen. It was exhausting, but I just couldn't calm myself down._

_Despite all the love my mother drowned me in, and the love my father tried his best to show, I had already decided that I was the unwanted one. The second-born, female, disappointing, dishonorable, unwanted child._

_I remember Ren being sick one day and staying home from school. Honest to goodness sick, not intentional-milk-drinking sick. It was pouring outside when it was time to go home. Ren had always been the one to remember things like bringing an umbrella, and I wasn't able to pick up the slack without him there. I almost started walking home on my own, but Mama had once said that if it was ever raining really hard, that my brother and I could stay at school and a servant would come get us in the carriage. It had been a long time ago that she had said this, but I figured maybe, with her memory, she wouldn't forget.  
_  
_So I waited._

_And waited._

_And waited._

_One by one, all of the other children were picked up by their parents. Soon, I was alone. I remember being cold. I hoped that if the rain stopped that I could maybe walk home, but if anything, it rained harder._

_Mrs. Chi stood beside me patiently. She was very kind, trying to distract me with conversation instead of grumbling about how she had better things to do._

"Do you think they may have forgotten?"

_She had been trying to ask an innocent question, but I remember it stabbing me so suddenly. My brother was at home. Maybe it was only that someone would come get me if he was there. Yeah, what good was I without my brother?_

_I cried. No one was going to come for me. I decided that. My parents didn't love me. Why would they want an extra child? They had their heir, what purpose did I serve? Why was I even bo-_

"Hm? Is this for you, Lien?"

_I looked up. Out in the distance, someone was walking toward us, umbrella in hand. I wiped my eyes. Li had come for me. Finally. Maybe she was the one who had remembered, not that it mattered. I could finally go home._

_But as my savior neared the school, I discovered I was mistaken. It wasn't Li at all._

"I apologize for keeping you waiting. Thank you for staying with her."

"It's no trouble at all, Mr. Tao. But I must wonder what took so long - car trouble?"

_From under his gold-handled, black umbrella, my father gave me a knowing glance. I just stared back at him with wide eyes._

"Yes, let's just leave it at that."

_We've never owned a car. Papa says they're beneath him._

_He held out my small, white umbrella for me to take, but I just stared at him more. Why now? Why did he take so long? Was he mad at me? Was I weak for not being able to walk home on my own?_

_I started crying again. I was so sad, angry, and confused about the whole thing. I didn't even know if I wanted to be picked up at this point._

_Mrs. Chi bent down and put a hand on my shoulder._

"She was extremely worried that she had been abandoned."

"I see."

_He put his hand on my head. _

"We can talk on the way home if you so desire. You've troubled your teacher enough as it is."

_As he shoved the umbrella into my arms and guided me out into the rain, I began to wonder what he was thinking. Was he mad at me for not coming home? Should I have been jumping up and down and clinging to him as if he had just bought me a pony? I stared down at my shoes in shame._

_But I noticed something: Papa's gold shoes were nowhere to be found. The ones he had on now were simple and black. Expensive to be sure, but in no way as lavish as his favorite glistening pair._

"I was trying to get the carriage out of the mud."

_I looked up at him in surprise. I hadn't been forgotten? Truly?_

"Pin-Mei realized right away that you had forgotten your umbrella, but she had to stay with your brother. I had the servants try to man the carriage, but it wasn't working out, so I came here myself. I would have been here sooner had it not been for that useless thing."

_I remember biting my lip, trying not to cry. No one had forgotten about me. Papa had even changed his clothes to come get me. He even came himself, knowing his shoes would get dirty, when he could have just sent Li like I thought he would. He cared. He hides his feelings a lot, but he really does care._

_I stopped and stood where I was, staring at the mud. He turned to look at me, asking if I had forgotten something. I shook my head. He didn't ask anything else. As I felt myself about to cry, I lowered my umbrella to hide my face. I wanted him to think I was strong, that something like this wouldn't be enough to make me upset. I'm a Tao after all. That's right, a Tao. A Tao…A…_

"Did you really think Pin-Mei and I would forget about you?"

_When I looked up at him, he sighed and walked over, giving an awkward movement of wanting to bend down, but having no desire to soak his pants. With an annoyed twitch, he finally made leveled eye contact with me._

"Don't be foolish. It would be impossible for us to forget you."

_He gave a faint smile and brushed my wet bangs from my eyes._

"Don't tell Pin-Mei about that. She'd burst into tears if she knew you thought that."

_He paused._

"I don't like knowing you feel that way, either."

_My love for my father was restored. I became more comfortable with going to him or talking to him or asking for him to train me. Though sometimes cold, I was always able to tell myself that I was important, that I was love by him, even if he didn't show it as often as Mama did._

_My body always hurt after practicing with him, but it was a good kind of hurt. I liked the feeling. Once Papa decided to start training Niisama, my lessons took a backseat. I understood. Or I tried to. Papa seemed far away once again. Once again, I felt abandoned._

_I hated my brother again. I was better than him at the Kwan Dao, but he was given all of Papa's attention. It pissed me off to no end._

_I remember finding him crying one day. All that attention and he still wasn't happy? I was about to go beat him up when he hugged me._

"Mei-Mei…Help me…"

_He was disgusting; he wasn't like Papa at all._

"What are you crying about now, you idiot?"

"I…I don't want to be head of the family!"

"What the bejeezus are you talking about? That's your job, you can't back out! That's what you were born for!"

"I-I know! But!"

"But what?"

"I'm too scared. I'm not like Father. I can't be like him. I can't be in charge of the whole family by myself!"

_As he started wailing again, I just scowled at him. But then, when I really thought about it, I could see why he was so upset. Papa was in charge of taking care of all of us; me and Niisama and Mama. He always had to be brave, no matter what. It dawned on me then that I might not be the only one who saw my father as a god, as something all-powerful, something super-human and to be feared by those who dared to do him wrong._

_Niisama looked at our father and saw, at the age of six, the type of man he would have to become in order to successfully head the Tao Family once he was handed the reins. It was too much for him to handle. I…felt sorry for him._

_Even though I was still mad at him for stealing attention from me, I couldn't just leave him how he was. I'm his twin – No matter how mad I am, I will always find it in me to be there when he needs me._

_It was on that night that I hugged him and made a vow:_

"Ren…I'll help you."

"You…You will?"

"Yup. We'll rule the family together!"

"Really?"

"Uh-huh! We'll both be heads of the family!"

"B-But...will Papa really allow that?"

"I bet he'll understand if we tell him what's up when you have to take over for him. Don't worry! You won't be alone!"

"Mei-Mei…"

_The incident with Suoshi occurred soon after that, and Niisama was never the same again._

"Who do you think you are, calling me by my given name? I'm you're older brother, no matter how small that margin may be, and you WILL address me as such!"

_Before the spirit was exorcised, he was much meaner than he is now. I don't know, when I lost that sweet, innocent brother of mine, I lost part of myself. I can't even explain why, but I became the quiet one. My harsh jealousy and heiress mindset was locked away, and it hasn't shown itself since. It wasn't until now that I even realized it had happened. _

_But something else happened a few years after my brother changed._

"It's alright, Lien. I'll protect you. Nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here."

_I…_

"You need help with your homework again, don't you? Feh, you're so troublesome sometimes."

_I…_

"You're cutting it off? That's a shame. I rather like it long."

_I fell in love with him. I tried my hardest to control myself, to hide my feelings. Still, even then, I would find myself sometimes holding him tighter, pushing against him more, squeezing his hand…I just wanted that love so badly, but deep inside, I knew it was sick. Sick, disgusting, and morally wrong._

_Valentine's Day has been the only day when I can show my emotions without being taken too seriously. I cherished that day when I could say "I love you," and simply be patted and cooed at for being close to my twin. I still had to hold back my blushes, to avert my eyes to prevent them from becoming wistful and pain-filled. _

_Did he ever realize it? Sometimes I wonder. The few times he felt the need to apologize to me, he would hold me, leaning his forehead against mine with eyes closed._

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry…"

_It seemed excessive. Could he have been apologizing for something else as well? I don't know._

_Do I love him for who he is, or because he's there? What drew me to him? If he hadn't changed, would I still feel the same? I find myself wondering about these things whenever I feel sorry for myself and my feelings. _

_I think one reason is because he's one of very few men who cared about me before my body changed. To him, I'm never an object; I'm just Lien, his little sister. Both Papa and Niisama…they treat me like a person, not a thing or a parasite. That's why I've always loved them. That's why I love Niisama. That's why I can't bear to be without him…_

_Papa…_

_Niisama…_

_I love you…_

_Don't leave me alone…_

_

* * *

_

Lien slowly opened her eyes and stood. Everything was black. Looking down, she couldn't even see her hands or any other part of her body.

"What is this? Where am I?"

Not knowing what else to do, she walked, hoping that eventually she would be able to find a light switch. Off in the distance, a spotlight flickered as if it were a dying streetlamp. Encouraged, she began running toward it. As she stepped into the bright circle, she realized how little this meant.

"Great, I found some light. Now what? How the hell does this matter?" She grabbed the sides of her head. "Am…Am I dead? Did Hao really kill me? No…No…"

"Don't worry, you're fine."

She slowly removed her hands. The voice was more than familiar, but she couldn't believe it was real. "W-Who's there?"

The light flashed, creating a larger circle. On the very circumference, she could make out a figure sitting on the floor, clutching his knees.

"Don't worry, Mei-Mei. You're fine. You've just lost consciousness."

She took a small step back. "H-Hey…"

The figure slowly stood, momentarily patting his backside as he straightened. "I never in my wildest dreams thought I would be able see you again, especially like this." He took a step, but Lien backed up once more. "Are you scared?"

She nodded. "You're not real…You're a trick…I can't let myself get close to you."

She could see enough of his face to make out a knowing smirk. "I understand. However…" He ignored her retreat and stepped out from the darkness. "After finally being able to reach you, I'm not going to let you go without telling you what I need to."

She tried to stop the surprise from showing on her face, not wanting to let this mirage get the best of her. It was her brother, or at least it looked like him. He looked identical to the twin she always walked to school with and laughed (or for his part, smirked) with and leaned on for support. The thing that set the two young men apart was the look in his eyes. They were warm and soft, a stark contrast to the stern maturity her brother's usually held. Either way, it made no sense to her. She didn't understand how he could possibly be here. Wasn't he essentially dead? Had Hao not completely taken over his soul and broken it down, dissolving it into nothing more than a memory?

"It's really been a long time, Lien," he whispered, bowing his head so his bangs covered his eyes. "You have no idea how much I've missed you."

The confusion was overloading her. She tried to hold back her tears. "Wait, what are you saying? I just saw you…the real you…earlier tonight. It wasn't that long ago at all!"

He gave a pitiful smile. "Yes, _he's_ been with you all this time. He's been able to share everything with you, and taken all those precious moments away from me. It makes sense that you'd forget about me."

"I don't understand! Who the hell are you?"

He continued, hoping that something he said would rouse her memory. "I'm sorry that I caused all of this. I'm sorry that I changed, and that in turn caused _you_ to change. You were so strong before, Mei-Mei. I admired you for that. But after he took over, the evil spirit broke you down and took that strength away from you. Even after the spirit was exorcised, he remained, albeit kinder and gentler."

"Hey…"

He raised his head. She could see the beginnings of tears in his soft eyes. "But really, if I hadn't allowed him to take over, if I had just been stronger, none of this would be happening."

She was staring at him, her mouth slightly open.

"It's okay. You can call me all the names you want now. All of this really _does_ make me an idiot."

Their eyes met. She slowly shook her head. "This can't be real…" She looked up at him hesitantly, offering the only answer she could think of. "Re…Ren?"

He smiled, tilting his head slightly. "Hi."

The tears streamed down her face. She clutched her arms, digging her nails into the flesh. The demeanor, those kind words, that dorky smile – they could only possibly belong to one person. Lien ran to her brother and wrapped her arms around him. She cried into his chest with no respect to the volume of her wails. He hugged her back, his right arm around her waist, his left hand resting on her head.

"I thought you were gone forever!" she exclaimed.

He shook his head. "No, I've been here all along, watching my life as if it were a movie. I've been sitting here alone in the darkness, watching, waiting, hoping that I'd be released someday. Not a day passed by that I didn't want to hold you again, to cheer you up when you were sad, to make sure everything was done to keep you happy. I've always been here."

"Ren…"

"I know I've missed so much. Even knowing that, I can't find it in me to hate him. I can't even feel angry about it. It took me a while to understand, but I finally realized that the spirit separated my anger from the rest of me. That's what he used to change me in the first place. It just never rejoined the rest of me. The only time I can remember wanting to be angry, and I couldn't even scowl. The person who's been your brother since that day has always been me…just not the me that everyone was used to."

She tried to look up at him, but he was firmly holding her in place. Instead, her eyes surveyed the ground. "I…I'd always wondered where the nicer you went. I got used to who you became, but I still missed you being more sensitive with me. Sometimes I just needed to cry, and I didn't always feel like I could without you looking down on me."

"Nothing I say can make up for anything bad that's happened to you because of me, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough to hold my own against him. I'm sorry that I needed his help in the first place. I just couldn't stand to see you suffer anymore. I thought…I thought that if I could stop them this one time, if I could scare them enough, that they wouldn't bother us again.

"But now it's ten years later and nothing's been made any better for you! You're still harassed every day, and he feels that he can only do so much about it! He wishes he could just punch some sense into them, but if he does, he'll be suspended at the very least – and then who will look out for you? If you were ever-!"

"So all this…is because of me?" She felt him tense, then he let out a remorseful sigh and bow his head. "It's okay…I understand. You changed because I got beat up. You felt like it was the only thing you could do. Because of that, you've lost everything." She let out a small laugh and buried her face into his shoulder. "It's because of me that all of this was set into motion. Hao said so. If I wasn't so weak-minded, if I could just get my feelings under control, Papa and Tadashi and the Usuis and everyone else wouldn't be…"

"Don't say that. If Hao was so determined to come back, he would have found a way with or without you. You can't let your mind get clouded by things you can't change. You still have to do something to end all this."

"But…But how? What the hell am I supposed to do? I can't fight Hao, not when he looks like you! He's…He's…"

"You'll have to find a way - even if it means killing me."

"But Ren!" she cried, trying to pull herself away to look him in the eye, but in his strong arms, she couldn't move an inch. She relented, leaning into him. "Ren…I can't do that…"

"You can, and you will if you have to. I command you…as head of the Tao family."

She paused before letting the tears flow again. "You dummy…You idiot…You stupid head…We were supposed to head the family together, remember? I can't do that if you're gone!"

"And Mu Qin can't do it if she's all alone." When she said nothing, he continued. "Don't give up, Mei-Mei. You've never been alone, and you won't be alone when you go back out there. I'll try to do as much as I can from the inside."

"But how?"

"I'll bide my time and gather all the mental strength I can. When the time comes, I'll hold him in place for you, and then you can finish him."

She finally pushed away from him. "No, I can't! I won't! I love you too much! I-!"

He grabbed her shoulders and put his lips over hers to silence her.

Time seemed to completely stop. She couldn't tell if the kiss was a peck, platonic, or passionate. When he finally ended it, he locked eyes with her for the briefest of moments. They were so listless and soft. Just staring into them made the warm feeling in her chest return.

He suddenly shoved her away, his head turned and eyes hidden as if he was disgusted with himself. She stumbled out of the light that had since receded to a spotlight.

"Ren!" she called.

She tensed as she felt what seemed to be two fingertips on her forehead. Her heart raced, and her mind seemed to open, as if she suddenly had a revelation of epic proportions.

"Don't hold yourself back anymore, Lien," her brother's voice came. "Just be the strong person I've always known you to be. Don't be afraid. Remember: You're a Tao."

Everything went white.

* * *

Hao grabbed Lien by her bangs and hoisted her up. There was still a pulse, meaning he had nothing to fear; her soul was still in perfect condition, and she would no longer stand in his way. He put his hand in position. Finally, after all the interferences, he would regain his power and pick up where he had left off twenty-five years before.

Just as he was about to reach in, his wrist was grabbed. The quick action stunned him, causing him to momentarily freeze. A palm-heel strike hit his chin, forcing him off of her.

He regained his balanced and stared, his eyes wide in disbelief. _What? How could she regain consciousness so quickly? A blow like that should have knocked her out for hours! Even then, it's almost inconceivable that she wouldn't have a concussion afterwards!_

Lien staggered to her feet, slowly rising with her eyes hidden by her bangs.

"Ah, I see now," she said aloud.

Hao slowly pulled out Houraiken, getting ready to fell the girl once more.

She reached behind her head and touched it, then brought the hand back into her view. Blood. "So I fell. That's why I saw all those memories…That's why I was able to see Niisama."

She looked around and spied the bandage that had been wrapped around her chest before Tadashi ripped it off. She casually went and picked it up, then wrapped it around her, compressing her chest.

"I really hate these things sometimes," she said, as if she were alone in her room. "All the backaches…It just makes it so hard to move around. Hopefully this'll make it a little easier." When she was done, she rebuttoned her blouse, then turned to face Hao. Her head was still lowered.

"I gotta say, I was a real wimp before," she said with a chuckle. "Here I am, the only one here who can beat you and I was wasting time crying and lamenting. I've sure caused a lot of trouble for everyone."

She walked over to pick up the Kwan Dao. Hao simply followed her with his eyes, unsure of what to make of this change in attitude.

"Yeah…When Ren changed, that really killed me. He scared the pride right out of me. It was like we switched places to offset the yin and yang we used to have." She covered her face with her hand, gripping her bangs. "I thought it was impossible for me to be strong without him. But now I see…you were the one who made him change, right?"

He didn't answer.

"Thing is, I actually need to _thank you_ for pulling all of this tonight. Without you, I never would have found myself. So really…"

She looked up at him, her eyes flaring.

"Thank you so very much, Hao. I don't know how I could _ever_ repay you." She raised her weapon. "Li-Ling!" Her grandmother's flower spirit appeared. "It's been a while since we've trained, but I hope you remember some of the tricks we learned."

"Of course, My Lady!"

She oversouled the weapon, making a rather awkward lotus shape near the blade.

"It's not what you're used to, I know, just bear with it, Li-Ling. Please."

"It is of no problem. I shall adapt"

She glared over at Hao. "Hao, I think we should review what's happened thus far, don't you?"

Lien stiffly turned to him. "You entranced me using Huan, and brought me here. Then you used Tadashi to keep me here, and prevent my brother from taking me home."

She looked to the Usuis. "Then, because of you, the precious friends of my family are dead. Even my maidservant, as imperfect as she was, you killed her so as to strip her of any honor she had."

"You…You took my brother, the one person I could always depend on. The one person who understood everything about me, who knew what I was thinking, who always put me first, no matter what. _The person I loved most_. You took him from me, and you used his body to play with the emotions of everyone who has tried to stop you thus far. Not only that…"

Her eyes trailed to Ren's body.

"You killed my father. The pillar of all I knew to be good in this world. The man who is like a god to me, who is everything I could ever hope to be, who is the person whose love and approval I want the most. He's the center of my existence, and you thought if you killed him, you'd be home free with whatever this stupid plan of yours is.

"But you're wrong."

She took a few deep breaths.

"Considering the circumstances – my father is dead, Niisama is unable to fulfill his duties, Niu-Nai isn't here, and neither is Mama, who isn't of Tao blood anyway – it would seem that there's only one way to treat this battle.

"I, Tao Lien, acting head of the Tao Family, will annihilate you."


	96. Gold Will

A lot has happened since March, including me finally getting a twitter, school, losing my job at Borders, Persona 4 things, posting new AFF stuff, and most importantly, yet another reprint of Shaman King is out in Japan under the Jump Remix imprint. It's printed on Weekly Shonen Jump-esque paper with the KZB artwork, minus the extras. They do however include "Remix Tracks," which are short stories that are supposed to show us "another side" of the Shaman Fight. From what I've seen so far, Takei is borderline OOC in some of them. But if the creator is making them OOC…does that mean they aren't actually OOC? –philosoraptor-

Thank you to those of you who sent messages of encouragement. Even though it's taken me so long, they really did help motivate me when I was frustrated.

As I've said before, I'm already working on other various chapters for down the (rather short) road. The alternate ending is also being worked on in hopes it can be released at or around the same time as the "True Ending".

And apparently A Gift of Love has a page on TV Tropes. Thanks to whoever decided I was worthy of that.

Happy fifth anniversary, everyone.

**Notes: Lien's attack, Héhuā Wǔ Cì, means "Lotus Thorn Dance" in Chinese.**

**The chapter is named for the score, "Silver Will" from Legend of Heroes IV**

* * *

**A Gif****t of Love – Chapter Ninety-Six: Gold Will**

* * *

_I can't remember a time when I wasn't aware of my place as the scion of the Tao Family. Ever since I was a toddler, I __knew it. I don't think my family ever meant to put so much pressure on me so early on. En was probably the worst about it. Father more than once told him to leave me alone._

_Father, for his part, rarely spoke of it directly. Instead, he encouraged me to learn things as soon as I was mentally able. I can't say it didn't work. I learned to walk before my sister. Though we began speaking around the same time, I progressed faster, and my vocabulary was superior to hers by the time we were in kindergarten. __I was reading at three, and tried to help her along before our parents noticed. _

_My parents were nothing but kind – my mother outwardly, my father in his own way. It was easy to thrive with the support they gave. They made me want to try, to succeed, to win. _

_I remember how I used to walk very quietly down the hall near their room or when I could hear the two of them alone. I'd peek around the corner and watch them together. For some reason, it calmed me. My father frightened me back then__; I found him intimidating. He's always had this aura about him that's very emperor-like. Whoever could feel it knew that he was the patriarch, that within these walls at the very least, his word was law. To see my father, someone so strong and proud, touch my mother's face so gently, to willingly pull her close so he could kiss her sent a near-pleasurable shiver down my spine. I knew what I was seeing was private – that my father would never purposely allow anyone to see this sort of intimacy between them. I enjoyed watching them, mimicking my mother's bright smile as I did so, but I wanted to be held the way they held each other. I wanted that love._

_At first__ I was confused, unsure of whether I would get the warmth from them that I wanted. My mother would sometimes look at me with a bewildered expression, as if she didn't know what to do with me. In the end, she would often just ask me what I was feeling. If I said I was sad, she would hug me and ask how she could make it better. If I was happy, she would hug me and laugh with me._

_My father was a different story. I've always looked up to him, but as I said before, he could be very intimidating. He never needed to yell at us. Just a stern look would let us know that what we were doing was unacceptable. It was rare that he ever had to do it twice for the same action._

_A smile from him was a rarity, a treasure. If he smiled at you, then you truly deserved it._

_When I created my first oversoul, I received a smile._

_But soon, for some reason, I began to think about taking his place more and more. It made me anxious. I was afraid I wasn't good enough. Not only that…_

"A weak cry baby like you thinks he can be like Papa? In your dreams maybe!"

…_the person closest to me didn't have faith in me, either. I needed some form of reassurance that it was possible, that I could be the patriarch of my family when the time came, and that I could make my father proud when I did._

_Maybe if I found out something from my father's past, like maybe he was like me when he was younger, and just grew into the proud man that he was, I could feel better. I ran to my aunt, knowing that if anyone knew, it would be her._

"Aunt Jun, what was Father like when he was a child? Was he like me? Was he quiet and meek like I am?"

"Actually Ren, aside from being smart and prodigal like you are, the two of you couldn't be more different."

_I hadn't wanted to hear that. I had wanted her to tell me how much of my father she saw in me._ _ I wanted assurance that I wasn't a failure or a disappointment, that they knew I would become someone strong like Father as I grew up. I sought solace in Lien._

"We'll rule the family together!"

_It had made me so happy to hear her say that. I was afraid that she hated me. After all, she teased me and called me names all the time. Deep down, I knew why. That didn't mean it didn't hurt when she said them._

_My sister has always been the most important person to me. Even as she berated me, I loved her. She's my sister – how could I not? I wanted to train with Father. I wanted to become stronger. I wanted her to finally tell me…_

"Ren, I know you'll be a man capable of taking Papa's place."

_Those words never came. Not to the real me, anyway._

_Watching my sister, the most precious thing in the world to me, being tortured for being who she was, for standing up for me…I went insane. I usually tried to be like Father and look at everything logically, analyzing everything, trying to find the best possible outcome and how to achieve it. That sort of logic wouldn't work on our depraved classmates. Those useless guidelines didn't help at all._

_1. Ask the bully to stop._

"P-Please can I have my coin back?"

"No."

_2. Tell the bully a second time to stop._

"Let her go!"

"Oh look, he's crying!"

_3. Walk away._

He was pushed down. The bully sat on his back.

_4. If the bully persists, alert a teacher or other responsible adult._

"Someone tell a teacher!"

Everyone turned away and kept walking.

_That logic didn't work. This wasn't just kids being mean; this was violence. No one would help us. I felt powerless, trying to find a solution all while fighting off the spirit's temptation._

_When I saw my sister bleed, my mind snapped. Every other thought and effort switched from "Find a solution," to "SAVE HER!"_

_I couldn't resist anymore._

_It was like being in a power-induced suit. I suddenly felt stronger. I was able to tap into that rage that I had always felt in the back of my mind__ and use it to overpower the bullies. They didn't stand a chance against me. _

_Lien was saved and I was relieved, but __I hadn't anticipated not being able to take control again. I became trapped in my own body. The night of my rampage, it took all my strength just to warn my sister to run away. If I had to be like this, I couldn't allow her to die – I refused to become this way to save her only to murder her in cold blood later._

_When she jumped, inside I was screaming, then desperately fighting to be myself. I needed to save her. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want to risk hurting her again. For the first time in months, I finally made a rational, well thought out choice. Even if I hadn't been revived I would not have regretted it._

_I was surprised that I was able to wake up. Even after all I had done, my family forgave me.__ My mind settled. That spirit of hatred was no longer inside me, so I assumed that I would be able to be myself again._

_I was mistaken._

_The spirit had separated my anger from the rest of me. My heart and soul were split in two, like another person was living inside me and holding my true self captive. He never allowed me to live my life, dooming me to sit and watch without me in it. To know that every smile my mother gave me, every word of praise from my father, every look of yearning I saw from Lien wasn't for me…it killed me._

_This sick life, this sick home movie…I didn't know how much longer I could take it. I hated it all. It was made worse by the realization of Lien's feelings. We – he and I – tried to ignore them, thinking they would go away. He told me he found it impossible to love anyone. Of course, he was my hatred__, only with a certain bit of kindness and a stoic personality. I was the half that was able to have amorous feelings._

_I tutored Lien as my father had done with our mother. I had the potential to be admitted to the most prestigious high school in the area. He and I agreed that we wouldn't go without her. As twins, it just made sense to go together. We wouldn't allow her to face her ignorant classmates alone. So for days upon days, nights upon nights, we studied. Every spare moment was dedicated to helping her pass the notoriously difficult entrance exam._

_Her smile and her tears on the day we received our scores made it all worth it._

_We weren't so naïve to assume that we would fit right in, but I couldn't help feeling surprised and disgusted nonetheless._

"Tao Ren. Sixteen years old."

_As I sat down, I looked to Lien. She stared at her desk for a few moments before standing._

"Tao Lien. Sixteen years old."

_Written and spoken in Chinese, our names are identical. Our family and friends who know Japanese and thus katakana will put an emphasis on the "Li" in Lien's name, making it two syllables instead of one. To outsiders however, __there is no distinction._

"Jeez, did their parents run out of names or something?"

"Or were they smoking some shaman herbs and were just too high to remember what they named the first one?"

"You're giving them too much credit! I bet they're just pants-on-head idiotic in the first place!"

_Lien was doomed from the start.__ Her appearance, inherited from our father, made her female students jealous. I did the best I could to ward them off, but if I excused myself even for a minute to use the lavatory, she would have fallen victim to them by the time I returned. Thanks to their parents, some of which had gone to school with ours, they became aware of our shamanic heritage, and we suffered for it, her more so than I. This double standard still enrages him._

_My other self became bored and joined the martial arts team to take up a few hours of afterschool time. With some encouragement, Lien began playing the piano, enrolled in gymnastics, and auditioned for the school plays. She succeeded in each, but eventually gave them all up for various reasons._

_She quit gymnastics, telling us that her chest hindered her ability to get winning scores. Though our tailor offered to modify her leotard to help with this, she insisted that she no longer had a passion for it. Xue, the one who had initially suggested she try, eventually forced the truth out of her._

_After winning the __role she had rightfully earned during the auditions, she almost gave up her part to someone less talented because her classmates told her she didn't deserve it. Though Father persuaded her to keep it, she hasn't tried out for any productions since then._

_Father bought her a piano and __put it at the end of the corridor near his study. Despite the fact that he often keeps the door closed while he is reading, when she played it was always open. When she found out he was listening to her, she quickly abandoned it. There are few occasions were I've seen him look as disappointed as he did then._

_I tried to convince her to return to it, but she refused. The darker me hates that part of her; he doesn't understand her unwillingness to stand tall and be proud of who she is. This is true – Lien doesn't see that accentuating her faults only makes her stand out **more**. Still, I feel apathetic about her decisions when I'm not sad about them. I suppose that makes sense when it's impossible for me to feel anger._

_All those times she gave up something she loved, my heart broke__ for her. He on the other hand gave her semi-harsh words. Each time, she gave him the same glossy look. It was only a matter of time before we realized what those eyes meant. I found myself staring at her, laughing with her, feeling for her. He buried his feelings entirely._

"I-I like you! I have since last year! Please accept my feelings!"

"Sorry. I'm not interested in relationships right now."

_Every single girl who has confessed their feelings has met with that line or some variation of it. I never minded. None of them ever even took the time to befriend Lien, probably afraid of becoming a target like her. But logically, that would have been the easiest way to get to me. It's laughable that these girls think I'd honestly court someone who didn't get along with my sister. The one woman who does can't confess her__ feelings for me. That's fine. For now it's easier to live without distractions like that._

_The one thing I can be thankful for is that I've been able to fulfill my duties as scion of the Tao family. It's kept Father content and Mother…I suppose 'happy' would be the best term._

_She hasn't changed in __her treatment of me even though I'm not meek anymore. To her, I'm still the son she would cradle and read to at night. To her, her children will always be her precious darlings, even when they're grown with families of their own. Even Father is treated like a precious gem - I remember when my mother told me how highly she thought of the three of us._

She stood by a window, looking out across the estate before turning to my six year-old self.

"Mama, why did you name both Lien and me after Father instead of just me?"

She thought for a moment, then smiled.

"You all have the same character for your name, which means 'lotus', as in the flower. Do you know how amazing a lotus is?"

_I had always known what my name meant. Whenever it was mentioned, Father usually looked displeased. He was so strong and proud; why would he relish in being named after a flower? I shook my head.__ She sighed wistfully._

"You see, a lotus is one of the most resilient flowers. Its roots are deep within the mud of rivers, but it pushes itself up through the murky water to the surface. After doing so, it blooms a beautiful flower that floats atop the river, high above the hardship it endured. Your father withstood so much pain when he was younger. Instead of giving up, he persevered and overcame his strife. He's become so strong because of all he's been through. I believe that you and Lien will overcome your trials, too."

She looked away, her voice quiet.

"If only I had been born a lotus as well."

_I've never known the reasoning behind her last statement. I've also never asked. Though arguably much daintier than Father, 'weak' isn't a word that can accurately describe her._ _Was she saying that she has never endured a painful experience in her life? Or did she, but wasn't strong enough to completely leave it in the past? She is usually open with us – if she felt it was important for us to know, she would said it by now. Father is probably the only person who knows, and I have no objections to that._

_I don't think she believed for a moment that I was guilty. Her insistence that I was innocent gave me what I needed to keep going through the torture. Haha…The one time I was in control of my own body again, and I was physically chained down instead of mentally. _

_I never wanted to admit to myself that I'm useless without my angry persona…but it's the truth. Even upon hearing her screams when she discovered Father in his maimed state, I wasn't able to break the chains or keep control over my other self. _

_Now that's all gone. That other me has been devoured, replaced with someone __even more angry and hurt. I can't tell if he's noticed yet that he is not alone in this body, so again I watch in silence – watch those I love be slaughtered before my very eyes._

_I'll bide my time until I feel the moment is right. With any luck, this body will die, taking two tortured souls with it._

_In any other scenario, assisting my sister and protecting my family would earn me a smile._

_I have a feeling that Father won't be smiling._

* * *

Without wasting a moment, Lien pulled back her Kwan Dao, then whipped it forward. A strong surge of furyoku flew toward Hao. Unmoved, he prepared to deflect it.

Lien gave a small smirk. "Héhuā Wǔ Cì!"

The moment he touched it, the attack shattered, the furyoku turning into petals. They hung suspended in the air for a brief moment before simultaneously attacking him, slicing his body.

As they began to disperse, Lien charged at him. Hao looked up just in time to block a thrust to his midsection. They entered a deadlock, both too stubborn to back down. Her Kwan Dao was locked sideways, making it impossible for her to hit him. She knew this couldn't go on forever, but she didn't want to create an opening by backing down. After devising a quick plan, she released her weapon.

"Li-Ling!" The spirit gathered in her left hand. "Hyoi Gattai!" She quickly pushed the ball into her chest. _This is imperfect since Papa never finished teaching me, but at times like this it's worth a shot!_

Predictably, Hao took the opportunity to swing at her. She barely dodged. He tossed the Kwan Dao to the side, leaving her to fight weaponless.

"Stupid girl."

Lien remained silent as she lunged at him. When she was in front of him, she swiveled, slamming into him with an outward block and her palm under it facing toward him. She slammed it into his side, emitting a small, quick blast of furyoku. It was enough to stun him, and she saw her chance; she landed a palm-heel strike to his face, then executed a roundhouse kick, letting out a bit of furyoku with each hit.

With Hao down, she ran and retrieved her weapon, oversouling it again. After exhaling deeply, she rushed at him.

As thunder met her ears, a glow caught her eye. She looked to her right to see a wall of fire approaching her. Not having any other options available she flattened herself into the mud. The flames swept over her. She could feel the heat on her back, causing her to tense.

_It's just the heat; it'll go away in a few seconds. Just stay calm._

When it didn't fade, her eyes shot open, not needing to look behind her to know what had happened. As she had seen her brother do, she rolled over to flop onto her back in an effort to smolder the small flame that had been ignited. But her pain didn't end – she had only been able to roll onto her side. Her body froze.

She slowly looked up to see her brother glowering down at her, eyes flashing. He was holding onto something that she couldn't see. Before she could even begin to consider what it might be, the pain intensified. It only got worse as he pulled the weapon from the ground, that which had blocked her from fully rolling. She felt his oversoul slice her deeply across her shoulder blades. The last harsh movement sliced her diagonally, causing some blood to fly from the wound.

Once it had left her she lay still for a few moments, then began letting out a scream – it started off raspy, then became loud and bloodcurdling. Hao kicked her, intensifying the pain and rendering her near helpless as she tumbled across the ground. Her limbs twitched as she tried to control them, to force herself up so she could keep fighting. Her wide eyes shifted to see him advancing toward her. She frantically stumbled to her feet, trying to feel around for her Kwan Dao. Not finding it, her head shot up.

_It must be back over with Hao…!_

Lien turned, intending to return and retrieve her weapon. All she saw was Hao speeding toward her. She could only watch as he leapt into the air. She was defenseless.

Just as it seemed that she would be dealt a fatal blow, a bright flash of lightning lit up the sky, momentarily illuminating her brother's face. As she looked up into it, she could see wide, fearful eyes. His body stiffened as if the bolt had actually hit him and frozen him instead of frying him.

The light vanishing, she realized what had happened.

"_Papa! Papa, look! A thunderstorm!" Lien cried pointing out the window at the dark clouds._

_Her parents strolled up behind her, Pin-Mei silently embracing Ren's arm. _

"_This is so cool! How does it do that? It's so amazing!"_

_Lightning flashed again, and she leaned on her husband's shoulder._

"_It's so beautiful, yet so powerful," she whispered. "I love things like this." _

_Her eyes shifted upward and met his. A small smile crept across her face when she sensed that he understood the emotions behind her words. He suppressed a small blush before turning back to the window._

_Another flash. Lien's eyes lit up. "Wowww! This is so awesome!__"_

_She giggled and turned to share her glee with her twin, but his spot was vacant. She turned and looked behind her, scanning the room. As thunder rumbled, a clump of blankets __cringed. She frowned and tugged on her father's blazer._

"_Papa, Ren's hiding like a chicken again," she whined._

_Ren glanced down at her, then behind him. Pin-Mei did as well. She released him and he walked over to his son. He sighed as he stood before the lump of covers._

"_What are you afraid of?"_

_There was a beat of silence that was interrupted by more thunder. The boy's small body shook again._

"_Lightning can kill things…It can start fires and make houses burn down…You can never tell what it's going to do…That scares me…"_

_Ren ripped the blanket off him. His son timidly looked up at him, eyes still wide with fear._

"_It's not unpredictable as long as I'm here," he said firmly. "You never have to fear it hurting you. I won't allow that to happen." They stared at each other. "Do you trust me?"_

_The young Tao bit his lip and nodded._

"_Alright then. So you agree that there's nothing to be afraid of." He held out his hand. When the boy took it, he led him back to his mother and sister._

_Pin-Mei lovingly stroked his hair, smiling down at him reassuringly. Lien didn't so much as look at him as she continued to watch the show. Her brother grasped her hand nonetheless._

"_Baby."_

Thunder rumbled, and Lien stood, wanting to investigate, yet knowing that her objective was to arm herself. Inside, she was happy. This involuntary lack of movement was proof that her brother really was still inside. He had always been terrified of thunderstorms no matter how much he tried to hide it at times.

Hao fell to the ground, waking her from her trance. She quickly sprinted to retrieve her weapon. Part of her wanted to wait, hoping that when the young man rose, he would be the brother she knew and loved. The other part kept her firmly rooted in reality; there weren't any easy fairy tale resolutions. She had to stop deluding herself.

With her Kwan Dao safely in her hands again, she pulled it back to ready her attack. She launched another furyoku charged attack at him, but flames blocked its path and prevented it from doing any damage. Before they had completely dissipated, he rushed through them and began thrusting the fiery oversoul at her – aiming for her limbs, chest, and stomach. She frantically parried him, desperate to prevent any more injuries that would turn the battle even more in his favor.

He faked, pretending to go for her shoulder but switching back to her stomach. When she tried to follow up with a block, the wound on her back sent a strong surge of pain down her spine, rendering her immobile. A strong flinch was the only thing that prevented him from stabbing her vitals. The fire burned and cut through her left hip. She let out a small cry, still unable to retaliate.

Hao grinned as he fisted her bangs, pulling her to a stop. He kneed her in the face, then tossed her across the clearing. She rolled, slamming into a tree before stopping.

"Are you starting to realize it now, Tao Lien? It doesn't matter what sort of mentality you have when you fight me. Even before tonight, your brother was leagues above you in terms of power." He paused, as if consulting the boy's memories. "He always held back tremendously when you two sparred. It was almost painful for him to do so."

Lien's bangs covered her eyes as she tried to stand. She had known for a long time that her brother had always taken great care when training with her. It was easy to see the difference between how he sparred with her and how he did with their father. There was nothing to say. She was the weakest member of the family.

"There's no need to continue acting so tough. No one can see you here. Feel free to break down and cry as much as you want when I take what's mine. In fact, I encourage it."

She trembled. In truth, she wanted to cry so badly, but she knew that now wasn't the time. If she didn't fight, it would all be over. If nothing else, she had to wait until her mother came. Maybe she would have a plan…Maybe…

"Putting aside how that woman is barely a match for this body, do you honestly think she'd fight me as long as I have the face of her beloved son? Your father's hesitation is nothing compared to what hers will be. She isn't the hope spot you seem to believe she is."

Pain overtook her, and she fell to her knees. Panting, she looked down at the gash in her hip. Her pants were torn, revealing her skin.

Hao sneered and her weakness, but the smile slowly faded. "What is that?"

She looked up at him with tired eyes.

"That mark on your thigh!"

As if getting a sudden burst of energy, she grinned, slipping her hand into the rip. "Oh, you mean this?" She stood again, fisting and pulling at the fabric. A large chunk was ripped off, the waist being spared. She let the piece go. It was grabbed by the stormy winds, flying away against the grey sky. "This is my homage to my family; namely, my father and brother."

He squinted. Carved into the young woman's hip and thigh was a taijitu. Also visible were thick lines and sharp edges that encased it, making up what seemed to be the Tao family emblem. He tried to quickly scan his host's memory for the significance of the mark being on the girl, but came up with nothing.

"He doesn't know about it," she said in a low voice. "No one does. It's something I've kept to myself. If Papa knew, he would try to have it removed." Her head drooped. "But I can't exclude myself from our family's curse. My father bore this emblem on his back before he met Mama, and my brother bears it now. It's like they're trying to shelter me from everything the Tao family is based on." She clenched her fist. "I refuse to be left out. I'm just as much of a sinner as they are.

"I'm proud of who I am. I'm not perfect. I no longer try to be. I know that compared to my twin, I'm a failure in terms of fighting and shamanism, but I try to ignore it as much as I can. All I try for is to honor my heritage and please my parents – to make them proud of me." She looked him in the eye. "I can't allow someone like you to sully our name." She used her thumb to point at her heart. "You'll have to dig this out of me before I'll simply cry and surrender." Her yellow eyes narrowed, reminiscent of her father. "Do I make myself clear?"

Lien snapped her fingers and began running at him. Her Kwan Dao flew to her hands and she pulled it back.

"Here's one of Papa's techniques I can actually do…CHUUKA ZANMAI!"

Hao didn't seem phased by her rekindled courage. He dodged the blade as he had before, finding little difficulty in it. She swung the staff around, meaning to hit him in the ribs. He caught it. She tried to kick him in the chin, but he used the opening to kick her in the stomach. Lien fell back, unwillfully letting go of her weapon. Hao waited for her to stand before jabbing at her and hitting her in the chest with his flaming weapon.

"Too cocky – just like your father," he snickered.

He gave a harsh movement that launched her from the oversoul. Her eyes were wide open she looked up into a flash of lightning that graced the sky.

_Is this…really it? __Have I lost?_

She landed on her right shoulder, skidding through the mud before coming to a complete stop. She disdainfully stared at the ground.

_Everyone…I'm sorry…This is all my fault…If only I had been smarter…If __only I hadn't fallen in love with Niisama…If only I had just accepted Tadashi's feelings…If only I…_

"Are you done?" Hao called over. Glee was filling his eyes. At first she had annoyed him, but her silly pride and imaginary power-ups had begun to amuse him. It was already clear that she was powerless against him, but he wouldn't mind cutting her down to size once or twice more. He picked up her Kwan Dao. "Oh Lien…"

She picked up her head to look at him, her body tingling with pain. He nonchalantly snapped the bo in half. The look in her eyes was priceless. It projected exactly what she was feeling – hopelessness and defeat. She had nothing else to fight him with. That pathetic furyoku-powered hand-to-hand combat was no match for him, putting aside the fact that he could barely feel any furyoku coming from her direction. Checkmate.

"It seems you're out of options."

Lien stood, her hand over her right shoulder. "It seems like you're a smug bastard," she said glaring at him.

Hao raised his eyebrows minimally at the retort, then grinned again. "Are weak words the only weapon you have left?"

Lien said nothing, trying to stay strong. Everything ached. It almost felt as if her limbs, muscle and all, were going to detach and fall to the ground. She squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to think.

_I can't lose…I can't give up…I won't…I won't! There __**has**__ to be something else I can throw at him!_

"Neechan! Don't give up, Neechan!"

She froze, then opened her eyes to see Níu-Năi and Chun standing before her. The children smiled as if they were unaware of the danger they were in, like innocent mice wandering into a cat's bed.

"Níu-Năi…Chun…What are you two doing here? Can't you tell what's going on?" she yelled, hoping a raised voice would scare them away. "This isn't some game! You guys have to run! Get out of here now!"

Her younger brother's youthful eyes hardened. "Don't worry about us, Lien," he said, his voice similar to how he had spoken to her on the night all the chaos had begun. "We know what's going on here, and we're here to offer you one last trump card. If it doesn't work, then yeah, go ahead and panic."

Da-Xia nodded. "Yes. We have one last option for you. It may be hard for you considering how depleted your furyoku is, but it is much better than doing nothing." She turned to the boy beside her. "Yi, explain it to her, and keep the witty banter to a minimum if you please."

"Alright, alright." He turned back to Lien, whose eyes were wide with disbelief. He sighed. "I'll explain the circumstances later, but in a few moments, you're going to have to call upon Ren's spirit."

Lien breathed deeply a couple times, frantic that this ray of hope was fruitless. "I've already tried that! He wasn't strong enough!"

Yi threw his hands up in the air. "NO! THE OTHER ONE! THE COOL ONE!" Lien stared at him, utterly clueless.

The small girl patted his back. "Darling, she just doesn't know. She's not the heir. Just outline it quickly for her while I get things ready." She looked over her shoulder at Hao. The probability of him allowing such a long explanation to be given was extremely low. He may have enjoyed toying with the heiress before, but at this point, it was clear that he just wanted Lien as close to death as possible.

The evidence was in the forced smile he had been maintaining. "Now you're bringing children into this? They're not a weakness of mine. I don't discriminate."

Da-Xia elbowed Yi in an effort to motivate him to begin and end his instructions within the next minute or so. He nodded and quickly turned to his unknowing descendent while she rushed into the bushes. He spoke as quickly as he could while still being intelligible. Lien just nodded dumbly, trying to soak in as many of his words as possible.

"Be all triumphant about it, too. Make Ren proud of you. Or embarrass him if you're in the mood to entertain. Anyway…"

She zoned out momentarily. _Make Papa proud…Even if he's gone…I can make him proud of me…_

Yi whistled and snapped his fingers in front of her. "Yo! This isn't a class you should be sleeping through! Listen up!"

As he captured her attention once more, there was a cry from behind them. Lien looked up to see that the little girl had jumped onto Suo's back and was now reaching into the witch's robe. The woman was trying to shake her off.

"You brat! Unhand me! Foolish human!" She folded her fan and began whacking her with it. Da-Xia persevered and finally produced two slips of paper. Suo's eyes widened. "N-No! Those are-!" She tried to snatch them back, but her ancestor childishly crumpled them up into a ball and stuck it in her mouth. "Y-YOU!" She gave one last tremendous whack, and Da-Xia fell off of her like a crushed mosquito. Suo batted her back to the Taos, confident that she had incapacitated her.

Yi firmly stood in front of Lien, fighting the urge to turn and aid his partner.

"N-Níu-Năi…" Lien whispered.

"THIS ISN'T ABOUT ME! THIS IS ABOUT YOU! NOW SHUT UP AND LISTEN!" he cried desperately, as if trying to convince himself that the victim behind him was meaningless.

Da-Xia groggily raised her head and looked back at Hao. He had something in his hand. She squinted at it, noticing how it was reflecting the lightning off it. He threw it.

There was no decision to be made. After realizing who the other was, the two children had agreed that no matter what happened that night, no matter what sacrifice needed to be made, they would put the lives of their descendents above their own.

Yi could feel her small body collapse against his. He clenched his fists, knowing that once again, she would die first. Bloodlust in his eyes, he looked up at Lien.

"Got it?" She nodded. "Alright." He turned to hold his wife again before setting her on the ground. He had no weapons, but he wasn't about to let that interfere with his need for revenge.

He picked up the soggy wad of paper she had dropped. Knowing all eyes were on him, he smiled brightly and smoothed the tags out. He held them horizontally.

"Fuck you. All of you."

Yi triumphantly ripped them in half. Once. Twice. Thrice. He threw the pieces in the air like confetti.

"WOO! PRE-EMPTIVE VICTORY PARTY! YAY!"

His eyes narrowed as he stared at Hao. They both knew what the pieces of paper had been. The demon looked about ready to kill Suo right then and there for allowing such a blunder to occur, but first he had to rid himself of the nuisance in front of him.

With serious eyes, Yi grinned. "Hey, it's a party. You know what that means? We gotta dance."

Lien watched in horror as her little brother rushed at Hao, biting his ankles before being impaled by his family's sword.

Yi didn't look concerned. He stared up at Hao, his amber eyes flashing in satisfaction as he grinned. "Just try to stop her. We dare you. You've already lost."

Hao grit his teeth angrily. He set the boy aflame, then tossed him into the woods. "We'll see about that." He turned to Lien. "Come on then. Show me what that fool taught you."

Her face pale, Lien straightened, standing with her feet shoulder width apart. She closed her eyes, trying her best to remember Yi's instructions.

Hao smiled at her. "Going vogue on us, Tao Lien?"

For once, his voice fell on deaf ears. His taunts had no effect on her. She was too focused on her task. This was all she had left. There was a high chance that she could die from this, but it hardly mattered. She would die in a few moments anyway if she didn't succeed. There was absolutely nothing to lose.

She took a deep breath.

"Sp—"

She stopped. _Can I do this?_ She shook her head quickly. _Papa wouldn't hesitate like this. I…I'll make him proud…I'll make Papa proud!_

Hao leaned in. "Hm? What was that? I couldn't hear your voice over your clouded mind," he taunted.

Lien smirked. She raised her right arm, ignoring the pain radiating through it.

"**SPIRIT OF LIGHTNING****! I SUMMON YOU!"**

Her breathing hitched. It was almost like she could hear her father calling alongside her. Her eyes filled with tears as his voice rang in her ears. _Papa…_

The sky instantly lit up. Lightning bolts descended from the clouds, joining in the space just behind her. After some brilliant flashes, she could feel a small explosion hit her back. She didn't even need to look behind her.

The Spirit of Thunder stood behind her, its body glowing with the power of one hundred million volts of electricity. Hao stared at it, obviously surprised that the girl had been able to accomplish such a feat. Being able to summon an elemental spirit wasn't something that just any shaman could do. It took a tremendous amount of focus and furyoku to do so. His eyes widened.

_That means…_

Lien smiled at his muddled expression. It was wonderful to see her enemy in such a state of confusion that he was speechless. She closed her eyes again before looking up to the heavens.

"Papa…" she said aloud, her voice soft. "Papa…Can you see me? Are you proud of me…? Am I a daughter you're proud to call yours? Am I…"

Dizziness overtook her as her furyoku depleted, fatigue setting in. Her eyes closed. She began falling to the side, a contented smile on her face.

She didn't hit the ground. A strong arm grabbed her, holding her under it like a puppy.

Hao tensed, looking up at the person who had caught her.

A sincere smile.

"I am proud of you, Lien. So very, very proud…"


	97. Jiāzú ài

I have been going back through the entire story and trying to fix all those nasty typos, as well as get rid of gratuitous swearing and fix some wordings (Pin-Mei's eyes are no longer "full of starts" during her dance with Ren at their wedding). I've changed much of this since it was first posted, but I hope that's only made it all the more enjoyable.

By the way, new Shaman King stuff is coming in March 2012. Neato. What could be better than that? Oneshots coming in November. That's happening too.

There's also a new poll out of sheer curiosity since I've been PMed about this a couple times. How would you have felt if Ren and Lien had become a legit couple? I know everyone's views are different, but this is for my own amusement. Vote if you get the chance/feel like it.

One more thing to think about: Following Takei's lead with these Remix Tracks, if I were to have another fic that was a collection of scenes that weren't included in this fic, would you read it? Examples would be when Ren leaves Pin-Mei to tame the Spirit of Thunder, his early interactions with the twins as babies, similar scenes with HoroHoro and Rong, Tadashi and Xue on a date…or anything else you might be wondering about. I don't want to make it seem as though I'm a. milking this fic beyond capacity, and b. acting pompous by even considering doing such a thing. I'll probably do these anyway just for my own enjoyment (I'm still having fun!), but whether or not I post them is up to you. If even two people want it, it'll be posted.

Oh, there's a chapter here too? Well, let's get to that, then!

**Notes: This chapter begins about one to two hours before the final scene of the previous chapter. Hopefully I won't confuse too many of you.**

**Refresher - JieJie means "Older sister."**

**I'm playing up Pin-Mei's deficiency in Japanese. You can assume any other time that she either understood enough of it to respond in Chinese, someone relayed the conversation to her if it was important enough, or they just spoke Chinese entirely. HoroHoro on the other hand is basically fluent in Chinese now. Thumbs up to the Wei family for making sure their girls are multilingual.**

**Disclaimer: The anime/manga ****_Shaman King _****and its characters were created by Hiroyuki Takei. All original characters made specifically for this fanfiction and any tie-in/spinoff pieces were created by Jezebel Parks.**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Seven: Jiāzú ài (Familial Love)**

* * *

"I see…" Pin-Mei said softly.

She, Chun, and Li had been riding through the mountain for the last hour and a half trying to locate the battle that she assumed had taken a turn for the worst. True, sensing furyoku wasn't her most developed skill, but the distinct absence of the familiar, comforting feeling that she had grown so used to had put her on edge. It had returned minimally within the last twenty minutes, but it was only as strong as a chill, a draft.

But one moment of happiness had been found in the form of Níu-Năi, who had suddenly appeared out of the brush. She had cried happily and embraced him tightly, thanking the gods for protecting him, before her little boy dropped a bombshell on her. It had been one she half suspected, but had tried to ignore. Now that it was out in the open she couldn't deny it anymore.

"Yes…Ren told me his concerns about a month before you were born," she continued. "Da-Xia had told him you had vanished around the time of conception but…and Ren tried to ease the idea into me in case it was true but I…I just didn't want to believe it…" She slowly covered her mouth.

Yi looked up at her sympathetically. "I'm sorry. I didn't ask for this to happen."

Her head picked up suddenly, her hand falling. "I-I'm not sad, just…surprised…" She smiled nervously. "I'm just a bit self-conscious now is all…"

He smiled weakly. "Remember, I only realized it a few months ago myself, and I've only surfaced a few times since then. It's not like you're babying me. I'm your son the rest of the time – unaware that I'm a reincarnation, only knowing myself as Tao Níu-Năi. After tonight…" The smile faded. He stared at the ground.

Pin-Mei saw his eyes and panicked. "What? What about tonight? Tell me!"

He looked up at her. "There's a decent chance that Da-Xia and I will have to die again tonight."

Her face became ashen. She fell to her knees. "Why…? Why are you talking like it's definite? How could that possibly help things?"

"It's not definite. I just want you to be ready in case it _does_ happen." He looked to Da-Xia. They both nodded. He turned back to his mother with a smile. "Okay, we'll be off now!"

"What…?" her voice squeaked out. Níu-Năi ran and hugged her. She looked down at him, bewildered. "W-Where are you going?"

"Neechan needs some help, so we're going to rush over and give it to her!"

Chun bowed. "Thank you for bringing me, Mrs. Tao. Bye!"

"Bye, Mom!" He turned, but she tugged him.

"No, you're staying here!" she cried. "Your father will take care of things, so you just stay here with me!" She pulled him back to her and clutched him. "Just stay…"

He struggled against her, his face red. "M-Mom! Come on! You're embarrassing me!"

She clung to him, crying. "I don't care! I'm not letting you go!"

But as he continued to flail, he finally became more than she could handle. He broke free, starting to run from her. She gasped so hard that she almost choked.

"C-Come back!" she cried hoarsely. "I'll…I'll tell your father about how you're disobeying me! You know he won't like that!"

"He'll understand, Mom!" her son called back.

Pin-Mei quickly stood and ran after the two children. "Níu-Năi! Níu-Na-!" She fell into the mud, helpless watching them vanish into the forest.

Li ran past her. "I will retrieve them, Mistress."

"No…Stop...Let them go, Li."

She froze, then turned. "Are you sure, My Lady?"

Tears streaming down her face, Pin-Mei writhed in the mud, clenching it. "There's nothing you or I can do to stop them." She sobbed for a few moments before trying to get a hold of herself. "Yi…he was trying to give me the opportunity to say goodbye. I should have cherished it….instead of my last memory of him being how he wanted to get away from me." She crumbled, her body shaking.

Li watched her with placid eyes. "Mistress…"

"Mom?"

Pin-Mei quickly looked up. Níu-Năi was looking down at her, a look of discomfort on his face. She sat up and tried to brush the mud off her clothes.

She stared at him, her eyes still tearful. "You came back…"

He nodded. "Well yeah…I mean…" He fidgeted, looking away from her.

She breathed deeply, then tilted her head, trying to act as she normally would. "What is it, sweetheart?"

He finally made eye contact, a blush covering his face. "You didn't give me a goodbye kiss."

She looked slightly astonished, then tried to smile. "I'm sorry. Would you like one now?" He nodded sheepishly. "Well then, come here, you!"

She hugged him tightly, then gave him a quick peck. Biting her lip, she stared into his eyes.

"Be careful, okay? I want you home for dinner. It's been a long time since we all ate together." She was still trying to keep a calm façade – she knew it was nowhere near dinnertime.

He smiled and nodded. "I'll be careful." He gave a small saluting gesture. "Tao's honor!"

Pin-Mei laughed and wiped her eyes. She spread her arms again. "One more for the road?" He nodded and she held him close one last time. With one last squeeze, she let go.

"I'm going, Mom."

"Alright. Goodbye," she whispered. She turned him and gave him a light tap on the backside. "Go have fun."

"I plan on it!" He looked over his shoulder at her and smiled, then ran to catch up with Chun, waving back at her. "See you later!"

She waved back. "I love you!"

"Love you too!"

He disappeared into the fog.

Pin-Mei tried to smile as she lowered her hand. She stared into the darkness her son had willingly run into. Li came up next to her.

"My Lady."

Pin-Mei nodded. "Yes, let's go. That's all we can do for now. "

Back on their horses, Li tried her best to feel for a familiar furyoku signature. It was no use. Most were too weak to latch onto but more than enough to muddle and obscure the ones that she actually needed to make out. After another ten minutes, she spied a staggering figure.

Pin-Mei squinted. "Who is that?" The woman clung to a tree as she tried to walk. "Let's stop. I can't imagine she isn't involved _somehow_."

Li silently halted her horse, then jogged up to spot her master as she dismounted hers.

She nodded. "Thank you." Her guard gave a bow of the head and Pin-Mei turned to the wounded female before her. She cautiously stepped toward her. "Miss? Are you alright? What happened?"

The woman stiffened. She looked up. "You're…" She practically fell forward, meaning to grab her arm. Li got between them and held up her chakram with stern eyes.

"I discourage you from making any sudden movements until we can establish your loyalty," she warned.

The female studied her, then nodded, her eyes low. "I understand…however, I doubt that I have a way to prove myself."

Li stepped to the side, still covering Pin-Mei. "Then I suggest you be on your way."

Their eyes met again. She shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't…I just can't die…If I die, that group can't come back…" She looked past her at Pin-Mei. "Please…Just so I'll live. I don't need to be fully healed."

Pin-Mei was torn. Someone before her was mortally wounded. Normally she would immediately run over and heal her, not about to turn away from someone in need. Now she was forced to hesitate; healing this person could prove to be a fatal mistake if it just so happened that she was on the wrong side.

She shook her head. "I'm sorry. I can't."

The woman looked at the ground. "Please understand."

"I ask the same of you," Li said as she slowly reattached her chakram to her belt. "We are not in a position where we can just trust anyone who comes along without any personal ties. We can't afford betrayal at the moment." She looked back at Pin-Mei with a nod. "My Lady, we mustn't waste any more time here." She carefully turned her and guided her back to her horse. Pin-Mei reluctantly obeyed.

"Mrs. Tao, please wait!"

She stopped. "That voice…" She whirled around. "Tadashi?"

Sure enough, there was a faint outline of the young man's spirit standing next to the victim. He touched her arms as if trying to support her, but knew that with his intangible state it was impossible for him to do so.

"Kaasan, it's okay. I'll make sure you get help," he said softly. He looked up at Pin-Mei. "Please heal her! She's not your enemy!"

But she was staring at him in disbelief. "Tadashi…you're…"

"Forget me! Just heal my mother!" he yelled. He squeezed his eyes shut. "All of this is my fault, so I'm in no place to ask for any favors…" He looked her in the eye. "But Kaasan is innocent! It's because of her that Ren and the Usuis will be revived! But if she dies, so do they! They need to feed off of her life force in order to truly live. She's offering her life in place of theirs, so don't punish her!"

Aika looked at him with tired eyes. "Yuntaku…"

He smiled at her. "We'll be together soon anyway, right? But you have something you want to accomplish first, so I'll make sure that happens." He turned back to Pin-Mei who was still staring at them. "Ren and Lien said you loved your husband more than anything. If that's true, then you'll heal her. Without her, he'll die, and you'll never be able to bring him back."

At this, Pin-Mei's eyes widened. "Ren is…?-!" Without wasting another moment, she ran over and lowered the Ryukyuan to the ground. She saw that the mother's hand was pressed against her stomach, and she prudently removed it. Her blouse was drenched with blood which was coming from the stab wound Hao had inflicted on her. "This is horrible…"

As she placed her hand over the impalement Li came to sit behind Aika to keep her from falling over. They all sat in silence for a few moments as the process began.

"Tao Pin-Mei, yes?" Aika whispered.

"Yes, that's right," the healer replied, her face placid as she concentrated on her task.

"I can only assume that you plan on joining your family in the battle up ahead, so there are some things you should know."

She waited for her to make some noise of acknowledgement, but finally continued when nothing came.

"Your son…Ren…he's been possessed by Hao." She could feel her muscles tense, but she said nothing. "When you go there, you mustn't under any circumstances hold back. Your husband did and he paid dearly for it."

Pin-Mei's eyes were now wide and quivering. She'd already had to deal with almost losing Ren once that night. The thought of losing him again, this time for good, was unbearable. Part of her wanted to leave the woman and rush to him, making sure he was alive before coming back to tend to her, but she knew that wasn't the most benevolent option. She tried to change the subject briefly. She looked to Tadashi.

"So what happened to you? You look different from the last time I saw you. And…how did you die?"

He looked mildly surprised at her concern, then smiled. "I've been dead all along. I forgot about how I died, and that Hao resurrected me for his own purposes. I forgot everything until Suo made me remember." He bowed his head. "You were right to be upset at me for having her picture." He reached into his blazer and took out the small, thin case. He opened it. "See? Now that I'm free the picture is of who it's supposed to be."

His mother turned her head to see her high school portrait staring back at her. She looked up at him. "You had this?"

He nodded with another smile. "I found it in Dad's things when I was cleaning. He had thrown some others away, but I also found a picture of you holding a baby in the hospital…with my name on the back of it. I could only assume it was you."

She looked at the ground sadly. "He changed it, just as I knew he would. I had spent so long thinking of a good name, too." She looked up at him. "W-Would you mind if I called you by the name I gave you? I know I have a couple times already, but I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable…"

"Of course you can. I don't mind having two names." He let out a small chuckle.

For the first time, she smiled. "Thank you."

He poked her. "Just as long as you make that face more often. It suits you better."

She paused, then smiled again. "Alright."

Pin-Mei watched them, thinking of how Ren had begun to open his heart to her all those years ago.

"_Don__'__t __cry __so __much. __You__'__re __much __prettier __when __you __smile.__"_

All she wanted was to go to his side, to make sure he was okay. _If he's hurt again, I'm not sure I'll be able to handle it…Twice in one night is far too much…_

Aika suddenly grabbed her wrist and lifted it off of her. "Thank you, that's all I need." Their eyes met again. She still looked tired and pale, as if the healing had barely been enough.

"Are you sure?"

She nodded. "It's more important that you reach your daughter and husband right now. They need you in their own ways." She pointed in the way which she had come. "That way. About one kilometer. Ignore the battle and tend to your husband first."

Pin-Mei digested her words. Ignore the battle? Would that even be possible?

"I know you're confused, but just do as I say. Ignore Lien and make sure the two legendary warriors are healed. _Then_ you can worry about her."

Pin-Mei bit her lip. "Will I even have enough furyoku for this?"

Li hesitated, then opened her vest. "My Lady, I will give you this." She held up a small vial of cloudy liquid. "Once you feel your furyoku is almost gone, you can have a sip of this. It will boost it temporarily, but it could be very damaging once it wears off."

Pin-Mei studied her. "How long does it last?"

"Unfortunately it varies by the user."

She nodded. "Alright. I'll accept that. Come, Li." She turned and walked back to her horse. As she trotted past Aika and Tadashi, she paused. "…Thank you for the information."

Aika nodded.

"Thank you, Mrs. Tao," Tadashi said, still beaming.

She smiled weakly. "Of course. Ren himself would scold me if I didn't help you out."

"So I guess I'll scold _you_ if you don't help _him_ out," he said with a small laugh. "Go on! If you get there too late, then everyone's in deep trouble!"

Pin-Mei nodded. "Right. I'll be going now." She raced off into the darkness, Li following close behind.

She could feel her hands shake as she gripped the reigns. What Aika had said had her more on edge than ever. _Ren…I know you'll be okay. You're far too strong to be outdone by the likes of Suo, and I know you can hold your own against Hao. Even if you _do_ end up needing me, I'm coming. I'll be there soon. I won't let you down!_

"My Lady, we should dismount to avoid making unnecessary noise."

She quickly looked up to see that something was off in the distance. A small gasp escaped her as she halted her horse, then leapt from in. She stumbled, her landing shaky and making her fall to the ground. Before Li could pull her up, she frantically stood, brushing her away. The sinking feeling from earlier that evening had returned. She began a slow trek over to what she saw. As it came into focus, she paused, then sprinted toward it. Li matched her pace, anticipating what was about to happen.

Pin-Mei stopped short and looked down. Just as she feared, Ren lay before her. He showed no signs of movement, no signs of breathing.

Li heard a sharp intake of breath from her mistress, and immediately grabbed her around the waist with her left arm, then used her right to cover her mouth. Muffled screams came from her as her body flailed, unable to accept that once again, for the second time in less than six hours, her husband was laying half-dead in front of her.

_If I don't calm her down, there's no doubt that we'll be discovered._ Li released her waist to reach into her vest for a burdock vial. Pin-Mei fell to her knees, causing Li to nearly land on top of her as she tried to keep her mouth covered. She hit a pressure point to momentarily silence her, then reached around and tipped the liquid into her mouth. Pin-Mei's eyes shot open and she spit it back out, the foreign taste being too much for her to handle.

Her hands hit the ground and she hung her head, shutting her eyes tight as she coughed. _This is too much…I don't want to go through this again…Ren…How did you end up like this?_ Tears fell from her eyes as she continued to mourn. Her crying had quieted, so Li allowed her to sob without restraining her. Still, she was inconsolable.

"Please don't leave me…I need you…I love you…"

She felt a finger collapse onto her lips. Her eyes slowly opened, then widened.

Ren was looking up at her with heavy eyes, his breathing impeded. "Your furyoku is pouring out of you…I should have done a better job of…making sure you could adequately suppress it. It's a miracle…that Hao and Suo…haven't noticed you yet."

She just stared down at him, new tears brimming in her eyes then slowly falling down her cheeks. Her shoulders shook as she sat back on her legs.

"Calm down."

She nodded, trying to obey him, but she fisted her tunic, overcome with relief over him being alive. Still, it was doing nothing to stop her emotions and furyoku from going haywire. He tilted his head up, then grabbed the front of her outfit and roughly pulled her down.

Their lips crashed together. Pin-Mei blinked a couple times, a small blush on her face. Her eyes finally closed, her mind realizing that he was still with her, that there was no need to cry anymore. When he let go of her, she sat up, the tears gone from her eyes.

"Calmed down now?" Ren asked her in a curt voice. She nodded dumbly and he smirked. "Good. Now put that furyoku to good use and heal me. We don't have time for this."

His eyes shifted to look behind him, and she followed. Voices could be heard from a few meters away, obscured by the trees.

"_I, __Tao __Lien, __as __acting __head __of __the __Tao __family, __will __annihilate __you.__"_

Her eyes widened. "Lien…"

Their eyes met. "We both know that Lien can't hold him for long. We've got to hurry. Heal me."

She nodded and gently turned him onto his back. Her eyes went sad when the fatal wound on his chest came into view. She quickly covered as much of it with her hands as she could. They began to glow with a faint light.

Ren and Pin-Mei's eyes met once more. "I thought something bad had happened," she whispered. "I'm just sorry that I was right."

His eyes shifted away from her. "It's my own fault. I held back…"

"Because it's Ren, right?" Shocked, he looked to her again. She smiled nervously. "I was told before I got here. Even knowing that, I'm not sure if I can fight against him." Her head lowered.

He slowly lifted his right hand to cover hers. "It's fine. I'll take care of this. Just make sure you heal HoroHoro as well. I need that idiot."

She let out a small laugh. "Alright I will."

Footsteps came as Li passed her. Pin-Mei watched as she walked over to a discolored body and lightly touched it. After a few moments she made a fist with her right hand and crossed the arm against her chest, bowing her head. She stood and looked around. Her eyes rested on a pale yet burned body next to HoroHoro. She now went to this one, her stride much brisker.

"JieJie…" she whispered as she knelt down. She ran her hand through Rong's hair, her eyes and mouth twitching as if they were unsure of how to react.

"Rong…" Pin-Mei whispered. She looked to Ren again. "Is everyone…?" His stoic nod made her wish she hadn't asked. _J-Just concentrate on healing him…_

Li grabbed her opposite wrist as it began to shake. She stared at it. _No…No emotion…No emotion for anyone other than the one I live to protect…_

_"JieJie, why don't you ever cry?"_

_"Because I have no need to. As long as Lady Pin-Mei is alive, I have no reason to be sad."_

_"…I don't understand."_

_Rong put her hands on Li's shoulders. "As hard as it sounds, you can't cry, no matter what happens. Since beginning my duties as Lady Pin-Mei's guard, I've had to bury my feelings. A guard cannot feel anything aside from happiness for her mistress."_

_"So...Are you happy, JieJie?"_

_Rong stopped, then smiled. "Lady Pin-Mei is happy. So long as that is true, I too shall be happy."_

_No emotion. Not for an outsider… _She froze.

_"But what if I died, JieJie? Would you show emotion then?"_

_Rong gave a serene smile and hugged her. "I would cry rivers if I lost my dear sister."_

The tears began flowing down her cheeks. As she realized it, she frantically began wiping them away. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry I tossed you aside like Father did, even after all you did for me. You trained me so I was able to take over for you. I'm sorry that I'm shaming my post and showing emotion for someone other than Lady Pin-Mei. I'm sorry, JieJie."

She reached into her vest and took out a vial. She poured the contents on her hands and rubbed them together, then ran them over her sister's skin.

"Forgive me. This is the only thing I can do for you."

Pin-Mei had been watching, but now tried to distract herself. "How do you feel? Has most of the pain gone away?"

Ren nodded, though he was clearly a bit tired.

She gave a small smile. "I'm glad."

After a few more minutes he stopped her. "I'll be fine like this. Get to healing HoroHoro."

She nodded and gave his hand one last squeeze before she stiffly went to kneel by Li and laid her hands on the Ainu's chest. Pin-Mei couldn't decide if she wanted to look over at Rong, if she could handle her appearance. She soon decided that she at least owed her old friend and guardian that much.

But as she looked over, she saw that Li was blocking her view. "Li, why are you…"

"I would rather my mistress not see. She does not need to be upset even more tonight."

Pin-Mei's eyes trailed to the ground, knowing that if Li was shielding her that Rong must look worse than she thought. She kept her eyes on HoroHoro, who wasn't exactly a beautiful sight, either. The burns on his skin were slowly healing, but he had yet to awaken. She looked over her shoulder to see Ren sitting up, stretching his arms and getting his muscles ready for the battle ahead. She cringed at the audible cracking, yet couldn't help but smile at the knowledge that he was alright. He glanced at her and she quickly turned back to her task, not wanting to be scolded again.

"I saw that."

She made a small nervous noise and looked at him again. He was suddenly right behind her, causing her to jump.

"How long do you think he'll be?"

She turned back to the Ainu. "It's going to take longer than it did with you. The burns all over his skin are taking a while to heal, and I can't simply bypass healing them to work on his vitals instead." Her head drooped. "I'm sorry."

He gently put his hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry about it. This wouldn't even be possible without you here, so anything you can do is fine." He stood again. "I'm going to keep an eye on Lien. As much as I hate to wait, we can't move until he's up."

Pin-Mei nodded once more, and he left to stand some feet away where he could keep an eye on both girls. She closed her eyes. _Please hold out, Lien. I don't want to lose anyone else tonight!_

She jolted back to reality as she felt one of her hands being moved. Slowly, her right hand was inching toward Li, who was also watching it with a stoic face.

Pin-Mei looked to HoroHoro, whose eyes were half-open and eyeing his wife desperately. He looked up at her.

"Can you do two at once?" he whispered.

She looked at him blankly, unable to decipher what he was saying. Li leaned over and whispered the sentence to her in Chinese. After thinking it over, she nodded slowly. "I can try."

He gave a small smile and looked to the guard. "Li...Please..."

She stared at it before looking to her mistress. "If I may, My Lady."

Pin-Mei nodded, and she took the hand and rested it on Rong's face. Instantly, Pin-Mei felt weaker, and a deep pain erupted in her chest. She had never tried this before; there was no telling how long she could hold out. Part of her knew she should only concentrate on HoroHoro, but all the same she couldn't find it in her to lift her hand from her friend's face.

"L-Li, the vial."

Her guard nodded and produced the elixir. "Just to warn My Mistress due to her rejection of my previous medicine, this is extremely bitter. All of it must be swallowed or the effectiveness will suffer dramatically."

"That's fine. Just give it to me. I need to hurry."

Li pulled the cap off and poured the liquid into her mouth. Squeezing her eyes shut in disgust, she reluctantly swallowed it.

"That was…horrible…"

Li bowed. "We consider it the price we pay for its benefits."

Pin-Mei realized that her pain and fatigue had gone away. Of course, the replenished furyoku made it possible for her to continue, but her healing was much more effective when she was comfortable.

She sighed. _I wish Ren would come back so I can heal him some more…He didn't look well enough for my tastes._

HoroHoro seemed to be trying to gaze around her. "Where'd that guy go?"

Her eyes lowered. "He's watching over Lien."

He looked confused. "What? Just watching over her? Wait, did she wake up?"

After Li had translated for her, Pin-Mei sat back, blinking. "She was asleep?"

It was clear that they weren't even in the same chapter, never mind the same page. He gave up. Moments later he tensed. "Wait, where's Seta?"

Li looked away. Pin-Mei tried not to look at the boy's body a few feet away, but failed. He saw her gaze and followed it to his son. His eyes widened.

"Seta…SETA!" He tried to jump up, but Li stomped on his chest, forcing him back down again.

"I ask that my honorable jiě fū remain on the ground as my mistress has not yet finished healing him. That would suit him best." She moved her foot. They stared at each other before she turned. "I am going to ask Master Ren if he requires anything of me. I will return." She walked away.

HoroHoro stared up at the sky in confusion. "What the hell did she just call me?" Pin-Mei simply smiled down at him.

"She called you her brother-in-law…It looks like she's finally accepting us."

He turned his head to see Rong's eyes open slightly. "Rong…You're okay…"

She tried to muster a smirk. "I told you he couldn't get me so easily. Stupid bastard." They shared a smile before he sat up.

"I'm okay now, Pin-Mei," he said quietly, his gaze once again resting on his son's body.

She saw the hurt in his eyes. "Do not worry. I promise he will be good," she said in shaky Japanese.

"She'll heal him, Horokeu. You go on," Rong said softly.

He nodded. "Alright." He got up and went over to the head Tao, who was still gazing at his daughter. "Looks like she's better," he said coming up behind him.

Ren glanced back at him, a look of relief in his eyes, then turned back to Lien. "It would seem so. However, she's not going to win this. Hao is tearing her apart mentally." He tensed, his eyes widening. "What the hell?"

Lien had ripped her pants to reveal the emblem she had somehow carved into herself. Being a practiced artist, it was easy to see how she could have accurately replicated it without a stencil, but the fact that it was there at all brought a wave of mixed emotions to her father.

"Why would she do that to herself?" he asked himself quietly. "How did she even manage to do it?" He had once made it clear that he lamented his son having to bear the symbol of hatred and pain that had disappeared from his own back so long ago. She had seemed to understand why he hated it so much, so he couldn't understand why she would willingly do something that she knew he would be against. He clenched the fists of his folded arms, gritting his teeth.

"Someone's in trouble~!" HoroHoro sang.

Ren glared at him and he cringed. Satisfied, he turned back to the fight. "I don't care if I have to fly her all the way to Beijing Xiehei Hospital, I'm getting that hell marking off her."

HoroHoro slapped a hand on his shoulder. "Well, first we've got to get rid of those hell markings over there…or something witty like that."

Ren smirked. "You're right."

They heard Suo's cry and looked over to see Da-Xia, in Chun's body, climbing over Suo's shoulder and trying to reach into her robe. His eyes narrowed in confusion.

"Chun? What's she doing here?" He then looked and saw his son. "Níu-Năi!" But when he saw the serious look in his eyes, he knew that his son wasn't actually there. "Yi…So I was right." He looked back to the little girl as he heard Suo scream once more.

HoroHoro stood next to him, dumbfounded. "Hey, Ren, aren't those…"

Ren looked more closely at what she had in her little hands. They were tags. As they were crumpled up and seemingly disposed of, his eyes widened. "Those were the binds that prevented the Spirit of Thunder and the Spirit of Rain from appearing!" He grinned. "Once we know the tags are completely destroyed, we'll summon the spirits, and then we can end this quickly."

His smile faded as he watched his son's friend fall against him and get up again, only to be pierced by a fiery dagger. He took a step forward, then looked back at Pin-Mei, wondering if he should alert her so she could heal the child. When he heard paper ripping, he looked to Yi to see that he had successfully ripped up the tags, rendering them useless.

"Alright, let's go."

He froze as he heard the nauseating sound of pierced flesh. Slowly, he looked to see the small boy's body skewered by Hao's oversoul.

His eyes widened in horror. As Hao then turned to his daughter – the only child he had left – Ren hastily stepped forward. "I can't let him get her, too. I refuse to!"

HoroHoro hesitated, then grabbed him and reluctantly held him back. His friend turned to him angrily. "Let go of me! I have to save her! I'm not about to sit here and allow her to die!"

HoroHoro struggled with him. "I know how you feel, Ren, but if we just rush in there without our spirits, we'll be dead, too."

"I'll figure out what I'm going to do once I get out there! I just need to get Lien-!"

"Come on, then. Show me what that fool taught you."

Ren stopped. Lien was trying to stand firmly on her own two legs, trying to shake off the painful slump she had found herself in. His struggling ceased as his eyes fixed on her.

Her breathing was staggered, as if she were already tired. Indeed, he could feel how low her furyoku level was. She couldn't last much longer. Still, if Yi had taught her something, perhaps it was worth waiting to see what she would come up with.

A deep breath.

"Sp—"

Ren's eyes widened. "He…told her how to summon the Spirit of Thunder?" he whispered in disbelief. "How did _he_ even know how to?" He fell silent, feeling for her furyoku once more. "It's impossible. She could never summon it in her state."

HoroHoro had been trying to think of a plan during this time. "Okay, so after she fails, we'll rush in and do it for real and—"

"She won't fail."

He blinked. "What? Didn't you just say she couldn't summon it?"

Ren remained silent, his bangs covering his eyes. He had been listening to her desperate speeches for the past few minutes, those pep talks to give herself courage. He had heard her demean herself, cut herself down for not being a prodigy like her brother.

_"I know that compared to my twin, I'm a failure in terms of fighting and shamanism…"_

All she wanted was to do something right. Something that she felt her father would honestly care about. She loved her music and her acting – but she felt that those things mattered very little to him, someone she imagined nodding off during a musical or opera. For her to win his respect, she believed that she would have to succeed in more "masculine" activities like her brothers.

"That fool…She honestly thinks I'd allow any of my children to be failures. I would be on her back day and night if that were true. How dare she think such foolish things about herself."

HoroHoro looked back at him. "Huh? What are you mumbling about?" He watched Ren pass him. "Wait, where are you going?"

"To give my daughter the confidence she deserves."

He stepped forward. His arm rose in near synchronization with Lien's.

"**SPIRIT OF THUNDER! I SUMMON YOU!"**

He breathed deeply as the sky opened up. Lightning was sparking across the sky, bolts heading for the ground and landing between the two Taos. Ren allowed his arm to fall as he stepped forward, passing in between the spirit's legs. Lien's stance looked shaky, as if she were about to crumble at any moment. He got ready to hit a pressure point that would put her into a restful sleep, but was stopped as her voice came in a soft whisper.

"Papa…"

He softened, but chose not to respond. He wanted her to think she had managed this feat on her own.

"Papa…Can you see me? Are you proud of me…? Am I a daughter you're proud to call yours? Am I…"

With that, her body finally failed her - her arm still raised, she began falling to the side. Her father quickly stepped in, simply catching her with his right arm and holding her around her midsection. He gave a kind smile as he patted her head.

"I _am_ proud of you, Lien. So very, very proud," he whispered. He looked up, his eyes meeting Hao's. A pompous smirk appeared on his face. "Let's just keep this our little secret."

He snapped his fingers. Hao's eyes widened as he looked down at Houraiken. The sword was fighting against his grip, eager to return to its true master. He tried with all his might to keep it in his hands, but it ultimately flew from them and into Ren's left hand. He swung it, then pointed it at his enemies.

"Now, where were we?"


	98. Once More, With Spirit

'Graduate!' they said. 'Get a full-time job!' they said. 'You'll feel like you have more free time!' they said. Lies and fallacies. What isn't a lie or a fallacy is that it's been quite a while, but I never stopped thinking about this fic. At least a good portion of the next chapter is written?

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Eight: Once More, With Spirit**

* * *

The two men stared at each other down. Ren still wore a smirk as the Spirit of Thunder stood patiently behind him awaiting orders. It almost seemed as if the two elementals were glaring at each other along with their masters. Hao's fist was clenched, annoyed that he would once again have to deal with the warrior, this time with his stronger spirit.

No one had neither spoken nor moved since Ren's initial arrival, bringing the battle to a standstill. Eventually, Hao was shaking with rage.

"What are you doing just standing there?" he said in a low voice.

Suo flinched, knowing he was directing his anger at her.

"Seal the spirits once more and strike Tao Ren with a curse tag! DO IT!"

She jumped before taking out a tag and quickly biting her finger so she could write a spell on it in blood, glaring at the back of his head spitefully the entire time. Hao suddenly looked back at her with dagger-like eyes, causing her to tense. She paused, then quickly finished writing before chanting and throwing the tag.

Ren watched it sail toward him, his mind desperately trying to think of how to avoid it. He couldn't risk Lien being hit by it, but there wasn't any time for him to hide her. If they stayed where they were, the curse would hit him full on, and he would most likely die a few moments after.

_Dammit! I can't just toss Lien, but diving to the side might cause either of us to be hit! Think! THINK!_

He suddenly calmed as he heard hurried steps from behind him.

There was a loud ripping sound as the tag was sliced in half. Pin-Mei stood in front of her husband, her eyes fierce with anger. She glowered at the villains across from her.

"Which one of you was it?" she asked in a dark voice. "Who was the one that tried to kill my husband?" She paused, waiting for a reply. "What's wrong? Don't feel like telling me? That's fine…I'll just beat it out of you. Both of you."

She looked to Suo. "I can't wait to get my hands on you, you sorry waste of flesh." Now to Hao. She began walking toward them. "And you…I'll show you what happens when you dare to lay a hand on my hus—"

A hand slapped onto her shoulder. Her eyes instantly softened, returning to their wide, warm selves.

"Pin-Mei, stop," Ren's voice came. He turned her around with his free hand, and she looked up at him innocently. She moved back to stand in front of him.

"Ren…"

Ren gave her a small, mocking smile and stroked her cheek. "That was unnecessary, but still, thank you."

Her eyes shined as she blushed. It had only just occurred to her that she had acted out of line, allowing her rage to consume her, and in the process making it seem as though he needed her protection.

"However…" He suddenly pinched her cheek, pulling it out as far as it would go. "I told you to stay in bed. You couldn't have slept for more than an hour. You and I both know that's not nearly enough."

"Aa…aa…"

Rong suddenly appeared next to them. "Milord, would you like me to take Lady Lien for you?" She held out her arms.

Ren gratefully handed her over, freeing his right hand. He pinched Pin-Mei's other cheek, a sadistic smile forming. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

She was practically crying out of pain. "I'm shawy fowah not wishening to you Wen! I won dishobey you again!"

He let go, allowing her to nurse her cheeks momentarily. She looked up at him, her eyes still glossy, then cast them toward the ground.

"I just couldn't sit still when I felt that something was going on. I know you can take care of yourself…I just wanted to make sure…for my own peace of mind."

He put a hand on her head and pulled her against his bare chest. "It's alright this time. Even I can admit that without you, we would all be dead right now." He allowed her to step back, making eye contact with her. "I'm grateful that you came."

Her face flushed as she quickly began looking in all directions, trying to avoid his gaze. "W-Well, I know you wouldn't turn away from me if I were in your position, and besides, I already owe you so much…"

A wall of ice suddenly erupted and shielded them from a fiery attack. Pin-Mei started, obviously surprised, whereas Ren glanced up, unconcerned.

"Oi! Now isn't the time for cuddling!" HoroHoro called.

Rong waved him off as she came to stand next to him. "Oh, give them a couple seconds. If my hunch is correct, tonight's been really tough on them – maybe even more so than us."

"No, I think we're done with such drivel," Ren said. He looked down at Pin-Mei, whose face was still red. "Right?"

She stared up at him, her face showing signs that she didn't feel the same way, but she recognized that when they returned home – winning this battle was the only logical outcome in her mind – she would be able to cling to him all she wanted. She took a breath.

"I love you."

He gave a small smirk. "I know."

He turned to face Hao and Suo through the ice, HoroHoro coming to stand beside him. "There are a few ways to go about this. One: We all take out Suo first, then Hao. Two: We do just the opposite – Hao, then Suo. Or three: we split up and take on both at the same time but in two separate groups." He paused.

"Pin-Mei. What do you think we should do?"

Pin-Mei froze, her eyes wide with surprise. "Y…You're asking for my opinion?"

He turned, looking slightly perturbed. "What else would I be doing? Now answer my question."

Her mind raced as she tried to quickly make a decision before he became more annoyed. Still, deep inside, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of happiness. This was the first time since deciding to have a third child that Ren had asked for her input concerning a very important decision. It was something she had been yearning for, for him to show that he trusted her judgment and ability to make thoughtful decisions.

"_People are equal now! That means that I should have a say in all these decisions you make!"_

It would seem that he had taken her words to heart.

_If it really is up to me, then…_

She relaxed her muscles, her hair covering her eyes. "Ren…" He made a sound of acknowledgment. "This is rather selfish of me, and for that I apologize, but…" They locked eyes. "Please, just let me have one hit against Hao."

He looked surprised. Not only was she taking full advantage of the opportunity, she was asking for something rather self-serving, something that could jeopardize their chances of success if she erred in any way.

"Please…Just one hit." A pitiful smile appeared on her face. "I think that's all I can bear. I know I should be able to fight whilst giving my all, knowing it's only Hao…but…I can't. That's…that's still my little boy. I can only see him as Hao for so long. I don't want to be completely useless in this fight, but against Hao, there's no more I can do than this. Please."

He turned to her. "That's really what you want?"

She hesitated. Then she bit her lip and nodded. She was trying her best not to waver, to cower and relent after asserting herself.

Expressionless, Ren turned back to HoroHoro. "Alright. Get ready to make a distraction."

Behind him, Pin-Mei's eyes slowly lit up. The fact that he was taking her wish to heart was like a gentle push, telling her that it was okay to feel the way she did about facing her son.

"Seriously?!" the Ainu cried in Japanese. "O-Oi, Ren, I'm not sure this is the time to be humoring Pin-Mei or encouraging her to be reckless!"

"I know," Ren replied flatly. "But I think if I just let her do this, she'll be satisfied. That will leave us to concentrate on Hao while she, Rong, and Li go after Suo." He glanced at him, seeing that his friend still didn't approve. "Just focus on distracting Hao. I'll do the same, as well as worry about Pin-Mei."

HoroHoro sighed. "Fine." He turned to Pin-Mei, switching to Chinese. "Just—" Ren cleared his throat, letting him know that he had better watch his tone. HoroHoro groaned. "Don't get yourself hurt, okay?"

She gawked at him, then smiled. "Thank you. I'll be careful," she said.

Ren glanced back at her. "I'm not going to be able to tell you when to go. Hao will know what we're doing, and then the plan will be ruined. Judge for yourself and go. And…" He locked eyes with her, his softening just a bit in concern. "…don't do anything too reckless. Come back to me immediately if you feel you're in danger."

She nodded. "I promise I will."

As the battle began, Pin-Mei stayed behind the two warriors watching and waiting. Rong and Li stood on either side of her a few steps back. The whole idea still didn't sit very well with her former guardian, but Rong felt there was nothing she could do to make her friend abandon her plan, especially now that Ren had given it his blessing. All she could do was watch and make sure nothing happened to her.

"R-Rong…"

She perked up. "Yes, Milady?"

Pin-Mei jolted, not used to her referring to her so. "I…I'll be okay. Don't worry about me."

Her friend's eyes softened. "I know. You're only saying that to comfort yourself, Pin-Mei." Black eyes widened as they met her red ones. Pin-Mei looked away, then back again.

"I'll be okay. Don't worry about me," she repeated.

Rong's face stiffened, but she bowed, Li quickly mimicking her. "The Wei family wishes you all the luck the gods can possibly offer," they said in unison.

Pin-Mei smiled sadly. "Thank you." Her gaze returned to the battle, which had predictably become more intense since she had last looked.

Ren hadn't needed to tell her to play the part of the concerned damsel – she already had the act perfected. When their blows were met, she would clasp her hands together almost under her chin, her eyes full of worry. When Ren pushed Hao away, her face would light up, making her look as though she were about to produce some pompoms and jump around in a zealous cheer.

Of course, none of it was at all an act. She nearly got lost in her role, awakened only when Ren gave her a side-eyed glance. She quickly abandoned her spectator position and looked around.

HoroHoro seemed to be about to knock Hao to the ground, overpowering him with a small yet harsh blizzard. This would be her chance.

Her breathing hitched. _My only chance._

It all happened so slowly; her son's body was hit by a chunk of ice. He wobbled. Teetered. He tried to steady himself. He failed.

Ren was about to glance back at Pin-Mei in order to see if she had been paying attention, but she was already rushing past him. He watched her run toward the body of her eldest son, one of her most precious treasures, in preparation for an assault.

Inside, she was screaming, crying. Almost as if, like her son, her heart had been split in two. One part of her pleaded not to hurt him, that simply talking would suffice, while her harsher side argued that he had already harmed her friends, her children…her husband…and could not be forgiven so easily, no matter what the reason.

_If we don't do this, he will just keep hurting everyone…I have to…just this once…then I'll ignore him and focus on Suo._

She arrived. He was already starting to recover. Quickly, she flipped her sword and bashed him over the head will the dulled side. This impeded him getting up by a few seconds, but overall did very little to harm him. After all, he had always been blessed with his father's hard head.

Pin-Mei recoiled, taking a few steps back. She should have been planning as she waited, not simply been trying to coach herself. She didn't know what her next move should be.

_Okay, I've hit him – now what?_

Her daze abruptly ended as Hao stood, immediately catching her in his crosshairs. Ren watched them carefully, ready to jump in should he try to harm her before she could get away.

Hao glanced at him, then gave a quick wave of his stolen Kwan Dao. A burst of fire erupted from it, racing at him and his allies, splitting and targeting each of the remaining four fighters like a pack of wild dogs.

The flames were not so easily deflected, either. Ren initially only exerted enough force to swat his away, but found himself being pushed back. He quickly braced himself, trying to keep the destructive force at bay. Looking out of the corner of his eye, he could see HoroHoro struggling the same way he was. Rong and Li had each turned their oversouls into shields and were trying to overpower the fire with sheer will.

He faced forward again, pushing as hard as he could. Over the flame he could see Pin-Mei in front of Hao – her body either quivering, or the flames were making it look so. She was on her own. No one could help her. If Hao made a move to harm her that she couldn't counter, that would be it.

Seeing her granddaughter's potential saviors occupied, Suo approached her. "Whatever is the matter, child? Did you not run up here to fight Hao-Sama? To prove that even if he looked like your beloved son, you won't let that hold you back? What's happened to your resolve?"

Pin-Mei grabbed her left wrist with her right, trying to steady her sword. "Shut up…" she whispered.

Hao saw his chance. He gave a bright, cruel smile. "Oh Mother, I knew I could count on you to stand up for me…" With that, he gave her a simple punch. She was pushed back a few paces, but it only took her a few moments to regain her balance. Unsatisfied, he gave her a swift kick to the midsection, sending her into the mud.

She frantically tried to stand, slipping on the wet ground as she did so. She finally succeeded and turned to face him. Her hands shook as they prudently held her DaDao. He took a step toward her, and she took a few hurried steps back, much like a trapped mouse trying to evade a cat.

Suo smiled. "Look at what this selfish wish has done to your dear husband's plans. You really are such an inconvenience, Pin-Mei. If you had no healing arts, you would be utterly useless here."

"I said shut up," Pin-Mei whispered back darkly.

She was becoming flustered. Suo was behind her with a cat-like grin and a closed iron fan, ready to swat her. Hao was in front of her, nonchalantly watching her suffer internally as she tried to separate the demon from her son. He raised the Kwao Dao. Her eyes widened as she followed it.

Turning away, she closed her eyes and thrust her hand out. A tag was slapped onto his forehead, causing him to freeze momentarily as sizable waves of electricity surged through the heir's body. It was similar to the tag she had used on him a decade before, though many times more powerful. She herself stopped, almost astonished that she had been able to bring herself to harm her child. As the tag fell, her eyes widened. A pair of golden eyes glared back at her, as if on fire.

Ren saw her hesitation. "Pin-Mei! Get out of there!"

She raised a shaky hand. "Th…THIS IS FOR HURTING MY FAMILY!" She quickly gave him an open-handed slap across the face. After looking at her hand then at Hao again, she motioned to turn and run back to her husband.

"O-Okay, I'm done!" she cried.

Ren looked up from the fire attack he was parrying. "Alright." His eyes widened. "Pin-Mei, behind you!"

Pin-Mei glanced over her shoulder to see what had him so concerned. Hao had caught up with her, and was now right on her heels. She turned back around and tried to go faster. If she could just reach Ren, then he could fend the demon off.

"As I thought…your maternal instinct is your biggest weakness…"

Hao grabbed her right shoulder and whipped her around to face him. Before she could struggle free, he gave a quick upward slash. The blade traced from her left hip all the way up to her right shoulder.

The blood poured out. Pin-Mei bit her lip to hold in a cry and stumbled backward. As she staggered she tried to get ahold of herself. The pain was of course intense, making it hard for her to concentrate.

"Regretting your selfish, foolish wish yet?" Hao said with a dagger-like tone.

She simply looked up at him, almost confused. Her stupor finally lost its luster for him, and he raised the blade again.

"Good-bye 'Mother.'"

Pin-Mei's legs lost all their power. She began to fall back, the Kwan Dao almost following her.

"No…Ren…"

There was a clanging sound. She fell against a warm chest, an arm immediately wrapping around her protectively. When she realized she was still in one piece, she opened her eyes and looked up. They widened, then misted. She gave a shaky smile of relief.

Hao himself seemed a bit stunned. His blade had been stopped. "H-How…?!"

As he tried to figure out how the Tao could have overpowered his fire, Ren slowly raised his head. His golden eyes flashed in anger as they locked with his son's.

"Don't. Touch. My. Wife."

Hao grit his teeth in frustration, a scowl forming. "So, the fire wasn't strong enough to hold you back? I'll be sure to use my full strength with my next attack."

Ren ignored the taunt. Instead he, his arm still around her, took Pin-Mei's left wrist and tried to flop her hand onto her wounded chest.

"Heal yourself," he commanded gruffly. When she simply blinked at him, gasps of pain escaping her, he continued. "You can't defeat Suo if you're wounded like this. Now heal yourself."

She nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. Ren wasn't going to scold her, to tell her she deserved this, that she shouldn't have done it in the first place. He understood why she had needed this so much. A weak smile formed.

_Ren…_

Just then, Hao began pushing on his weapon especially hard, taking advantage of Ren's one-handed block and causing the warrior to falter slightly. The hand holding his weapon shook from being strained by having to brace the attack alone.

Rong suddenly appeared and soundlessly slid Pin-Mei from his arm. He immediately used his newly freed hand to give his side of the stalemate the support it so desperately needed.

"Play all the mind games you want, Hao. I'm done falling for them, so I doubt you'll derive much amusement from me."

Undeterred, Hao grinned. "Jeopardizing your already miniscule chance of winning against me and my Spirit of Fire by allowing your wife to confront me on her own? Does she really have you wrapped around her finger that tightly?"

Ren glowered at him. "I let her do it so she could see her son up close one last time before I kill him."

"Confident, I see."

He smirked. "Of course. You're not half as powerful as you were when you killed me. It looks like Lien really was the crutch you soul needed to fully regain its strength."

Hao's eyes flared. But before he could reply, a wave of icicles flew at him. He ducked, giving Ren the opportunity to knock him backward. Just as Hao's back hit the ground, the large shards of ice flew over him.

"Oi, Ren! Slow down! If you just waited another second, it would have been a direct hit!"

Ren looked up to see HoroHoro standing a few meters away, a joking pout on his face. He smirked. "If anything, I think the answer is for you to try and keep up."

"You calling me slow?!"

"And if I am?"

They shared a grin before HoroHoro gave a small head motion, drawing Ren's attention to the foe that was getting up, albeit slowly. His expression hardened.

_It's time to end this._

He took a step back. "Spirit of Thunder! Oversoul!"

The monster let out a cry before glowing and surrounding Houraiken. The weapon appeared to elongate as the golden oversoul formed around it, its final appearance being a large, golden Kwan Dao. He raised it.

Before he could bring it down and conjure an attack, Hao took his own weapon and thrust it at him. Ren dodged, but at the last moment, the blade of Hao's Kwan Dao was turned horizontally. It cut deep into his side. HoroHoro shot a missile of ice at him, which was deflected.

Pin-Mei had by now healed herself and was waiting with Rong and Li for a chance to make her move on Suo. Upon seeing her husband's injury, she let out a cry and motioned to return to him.

"Ren!"

He whipped his right arm out, holding Houraiken. "Stay back!"

She immediately skidded to a stop. "B-But you're hurt!"

"I'm fine! It's not that deep! You've done your part, so just stay there until the time is right!"

Hao snickered as the warrior winced. It was clear that his words hadn't been entirely truthful.

Pin-Mei slowly shook her head. "No. I'm not just standing back and watching you get hurt again!"

"I SAID NO!"

Watching the two, Suo let out a chuckle just loud enough for them to hear. "Isn't your real reason for refusing her help that she is honestly more of a hindrance?" When Ren said nothing, acting as though he was ignoring her, she continued. "Honestly, look at yourself, Ren. She may have healed your previous mortal injuries, but here you are, bleeding again. All because Pin-Mei simply _had_ to satisfy her selfish desire to fight Hao-sama. Consider the alternative: You could have refused her wish, simply carried on with your battle plan, and avoid being wounded because of her foolishness."

He narrowed his eyes. "I allowed it because I wanted to," he replied sharply, without hesitation.

"Yes, but only because she asked, correct? You would never have offered her the chance of your own volition." She used the fan to cover her face, her cold eyes peeking over it. "You're an intelligent man – you knew it was risky to do such a thing. Pin-Mei's combat abilities are far from adept. Mix that with her doubt from fighting her son, and it's a recipe for disaster." She began minimally fanning herself in a small, slow, hypnotic motion.

"But let's be honest without ourselves. Pin-Mei may be foolish, but she's not imbecilic. She knew that asking that of you was selfish, and could very well cost you a victory if her failure was significant enough. So why on earth then would she do it?"

She looked up thoughtfully. Pin-Mei had since cast her gaze to the ground. Suo sneered with delight.

"Your goals seem pretty straightforward, Ren. You want to become as strong as you can be. You want to protect your family – to make whoever gets in the way of these things pay dearly for it. But Pin-Mei…what are _her_ goals? What drives her? Hm?" She leaned to the side to glance around the man in front of her. "Would you care to enlighten us, Pin-Mei?"

Ren raised an arm, as if to block her, voice and all. "Don't speak to her. Don't even look at her. The only business you have with her is the fight you two will have, in which she'll beat you handily once and for all."

Suo pretended to pout. "Why be such a stick in the mud, Ren? What harm is there in such a simple question. After all, it only requires a simple answer."

The hand that had been clutching his bleeding side tightened its grasp. "It has nothing to do with this battle, and I hate having my time wasted by things that don't matter." He replied darkly. "There's nothing you can say about Pin-Mei that will surprised me in the least. I've been with her long enough that I can say for certain that I know just about everything there is to know about her."

The woman grinned. "So then why not hear her reason? Then you boys can continue your little scuffle." She fanned herself a bit faster now.

In all this time, Pin-Mei hadn't even looked up. She was still staring at the ground, biting her lip.

"Go on, Pin-Mei," her grandmother said in a raised voice.

"Tell your beloved husband how you've truly been mine all along."


	99. Devotion Part I

Forgive me if the end of the chapter is just "LOL END." If I didn't break this into two chapters, it would have been more than 50 pages.

Some things are going to happen in these next two chapters that will make you say, "Really? Jezzy, you never mentioned _any_ of this." Well, no, I didn't. I wrote the first 60 chapters when I was 18. I was young, naïve, and quite stupid about a ton of things, including how abuse affects people. Love can be magical, but it isn't the miracle cure for life's scars. –bongos-

**Notes: This chapter contains quotes from **_**Where the Red Fern Grows**_** by Wilson Rawls. **

**To be on the safe side, I'll warn that there is an instance of a character being triggered, so if other people being triggered triggers you, you might want to skip the italic portion of the text near the end of the chapter.**

**This chapter is named after the Hurts song "Devotion."**

* * *

**A Gift of Love – Chapter Ninety-Nine: Devotion Part I**

* * *

"Go on, child," Suo coaxed. "Tell him. Hasn't he a right to know?"

Pin-Mei's head had by this time drooped. She said nothing.

Ren glanced at her, then locked eyes with Suo. "Tell me what? I know her, and she's so beyond transparent that it's next to impossible for her to hide anything from me. What could you possibly know about her that I don't?"

The witch fanned herself. "This façade she's kept up all these years is impressive I will admit, but it doesn't change the truth."

"Spit it out."

"Why hear it from me?" She tilted her head so she could look beyond the patriarch in front of her and at her granddaughter. "Go on, Pin-Mei." She snapped her fan shut. "Tell your dear husband how you've been under my control from the very beginning."

Ren's eyes widened for a split second, then narrowed again as he turned back to look at his wife. She was still tense, her hands now in fists by her side. Her position made it impossible for him to see her face.

Behind them, Rong gave Suo a toxic glare while HoroHoro looked on in disbelief, trying to make sense of what he had just heard. He put on a nervous grin. "You're joking…What do you mean 'under your control?' You can't possibly…"

Rong's entire body felt hot. She took a few hurried steps forward. "Pin-Mei! Say something! Can't you see that staying quiet is like saying she's right?!"

She waited a few moments, hoping she would respond. But nothing came. Her fists clenched tighter and tighter as she tried to keep herself together. Still, she knew pressing Pin-Mei when she was already upset would yield nothing.

HoroHoro, however, wasn't as understanding. He yelled out to her, his fists shaking.

"Were all those years a lie? HUH?! Is _that_ what you're trying to say?! All the things he's done for you? That you've done for each other? And you're, what, some kind of mole? I trusted you to take care of him and make him happy, and this is what you do?! You've just used Ren, pretending to love him, having his children…Was all of that a lie?!"

"NO! THAT'S NOT IT AT ALL!" Pin-Mei finally screamed. "That's not…What she's talking about…"

Her grandmother cackled. "I wish that were the case, Ainu, truly. The look on her husband's face in such an instance would undoubtedly be delicious. However, my grip on your wife's master is much simpler." She turned back to the couple. "I know what sort of tale Pin-Mei has woven for you. She tells you how miserable and depressed she was before she met you, and how after that short amount of time she spent with you as a child, she was an entirely new person. Touching, is it not? That one little boy had the power to change someone's life. If only it were true…"

Ren folded his arms, annoyed that this was going nowhere. "You seem to be insinuating that she's lying."

Suo looked shocked. "Oh, nothing of the sort! I simply believe some information has been…left out."

"Such as?"

"She has given you the impression that she has always been so kind and gentle and meek. She must take you for a fool. Did she ever tell you about how she mistreated the servants? Biting the hands that fed her, as it were…" She opened the fan and covered her face with it, allowing her eyes to peek over. "There was an incident in which she ordered a servant's hand to be mutilated as punishment for not shutting off her light before putting her to bed. What of the time she threw a rock at the one child who tried to befriend her at school?"

Pin-Mei's arms had withdrawn, her hands now positioned on her sternum. "S…Stop it…" she whispered. "It…It doesn't matter now…It's all in the past…"

Of course, her pleas only served to encourage the witch. "What a little miscreant she was. Throwing tantrums over dinner, wasting food and breaking flatware…Such a violent child…I also seem to remember an incident in which she had a servant severely beaten and burned for losing her during a trip to the market…" She paused, pretending to be pensive. "Oh…Was that not you, Rong?"

HoroHoro quickly turned to look at her. "Rong…"

The guard closed her eyes and turned her head, placing her right hand in her pocket as she did so.

"Rong, what happened? What did she do to you?"

She still wouldn't look at him. "It happened thirty years ago. It doesn't matter."

"It matters to me!" he cried, clearly agitated. "If something happened to you, I want to know about it!"

She turned away from him more. "You're doing just what she wants, Aokun. She's trying to rile all of us up and you're falling for it. Believe me, it's not as bad as she's making it sound."

He spied her hand turning into a fist in her pocket. "Is that where it happened?" He walked over and grabbed her forearm, trying to pull it out so he could inspect it.

She resisted. "Horokeu, I told you that it doesn't matter! We don't have time for bullcrap like this! There are more important things we should be worrying about!"

"Screw everything else! You're the only thing I care about right now!"

He again tried to pull her hand from her pocket. Rong, by this time seething, placed her palm on his forehead and pushed against it with all her might.

"I'M TELLING YOU TO BACK OFF!"

"NO! THIS IS IMPORTANT!"

With a grunt, she gave his head a harsh push, then gave him the hardest head butt she could muster, hitting him square on the forehead. He stumbled backward, his eyes wide. After a few moments, he fell to his knees, holding his head. Rong stared at him, breathing heavily before grasping her own and shutting her eyes.

Suo tsk'd them, shaking her head, then looked to Pin-Mei. "Did you see that? Your unwillingness to come clean has already caused a loving couple to fight amongst themselves. If you had just spoken up, maybe you could have had a civil discussion with that Ainu over there, and explained to him why Rong needed to suffer your wrath so much and so often when you were a young brat." She used her fan to point to Ren. "Though really, isn't _your_ spouse the one you should be confessing to and begging forgiveness from?"

Pin-Mei's lip was quivering. "R-Ren…I…"

"PIN-MEI, DON'T!" Rong called, still holding her head. "If…If you're going to tell him everything, then at least wait until you're back home, away from this hag. It has to be on _your_ _own terms_, or it's not going to help either of you! DON'T SAY A WORD - YOU HEAR ME?!"

Pin-Mei nodded slightly, trying to regain her composure. But staring at her husband's back only mae her more upset. Ren's silence bothered her immensely. Shouldn't he be the one yelling at her to save it, to not give in?

"I…I promise we'll talk about this later…I promise…" she whispered.

"It doesn't matter," he said finally.

_D-Doesn't matter? It doesn't matter if I tell him later? Is he already disgusted with me?_

"I chose to be with you knowing next to nothing about what you had been like during the ten years we were apart," he continued, his voice calm. "It would take something really horrible to make me look at you any differently than I do now."

She wished he would turn to her, to give her semi-soft eyes to show he meant what he said. But this wasn't the time for her to be selfish. When was the last time he had lied to her? She simply had to take him at his word.

"No. That simply will not do."

She stared past him at her grandmother. Suo was pulling slips of paper from her sleeve.

"I say you should lay it all out on the table right now. Get it over with." She attached tags to her fan. Looking up, she could see the look of utter horror on her granddaughter's face, simply thinking about what her husband would be seeing. With a smirk, she waved it.

Ren brandished Houraiken and pulled back to let out a blast of furyoku, but the tags were much too fast for him to counter. He could faintly hear Pin-Mei calling out for him to look away before bright light blanketed the area. He tried to cover his eyes, but found that it was no use. When he sensed that the brightness had faded, he slowly lowered his hands and opened his eyes.

He was in Xu-Fan Castle.

_What is this?_

"I told you, I DON'T LIKE NIÚRÒU MIÀN!"

Ren looked down the hall as he heard glass shatter.

"I'm sorry, Lady Pin-Mei!" Ling pleaded. "It was a mistake! I'll remember next time!"

He saw a sixteen year-old Rong drag Ling from the dining room. She slammed her against the wall.

"Heed my warning," she said in a low voice. "You must have the cooks amend the menu they have for Lady Pin-Mei. We can't have her throwing fits over her meals every single night."

"B-But she enjoyed that very same meal the week before! I don't know what's going on!" the servant protested.

Rong looked to the ground, knowing this had been true. For over a month now, Pin-Mei had been randomly deciding that she no longer liked certain foods. It incited tantrums on the part of the girl, and confusion among the servants.

Finally, she simply patted the girl. "I'll get to the bottom of this. You just clean up."

Ling nodded and went to the hall closet to get some custodial supplies. Rong took a deep breath, then re-entered the room to face her mistress. Ren followed behind her.

Pin-Mei was sitting at the head of the otherwise empty dining room table, pouting with a nasty expression on her face. She looked to be about eight years old.

Rong dropped to one knee, her right arm crossing her chest, her head bowed. "Lady Pin-Mei, please accept my deepest apologies that your dinner did not meet your expectations. Please tell me what you would like instead, and I will have the cooks prepare it for you. I will personally make sure it is to your liking."

"I don't want them to make me anything! I want _you_ to make it, Rong! You're the only one who knows what I like! Why can't _you_ do it?!"

Rong didn't look up. "I am flattered that My Lady holds my cooking in such high regard, but I have far less experience than our kitchen staff. It would be wise to leave the meal preparations to them."

A cup shattered against her boot, soaking her with lukewarm tea. She stared at the floor for a few moments before calmly looking up at her mistress. Pin-Mei's hand was still outstretched from throwing the teacup at her. "Cross" couldn't even begin to describe the expression on her face. Her eyes were dark and piercing, full of rage. Her teeth were half bore, as if her were about to start hissing.

"I thought that out of all the people here, at least _you_ would want me to be happy, Rong!" she screamed. "I'm only asking for one. simple. thing. And you can't even give me that! Aren't you supposed to be utterly devoted to me? Willing to do anything for me? Even _die_ for me? And you won't even do _this_? So much for dedication!"

She leaned back against her chair and folded her arms for another despicable pout. After a few moments of silence, Rong rose.

"You're absolutely right, My Lady," she said calmly. "You are my entire world and my reason for being, and there is nothing I won't do for you. Occasionally preparing your meals will be no trouble at all."

"Now that's more like it!" There wasn't even a hint of a smirk on her ace.

Rong tried to ignore her attitude. "If My Lady would like, we could sit down and create a menu for you, just the two of us." She reached out for her. "I won't quit until your meals are to your complete satisfaction."

"Fine." The heiress hopped off her chair and marched past her. Just before they faded, Ren saw her place her hand on her sternum and cast her eyes to the ceiling, then exhale.

"Now, what do you think of that?" Suo said, seemingly proud of herself. "That wasn't at all like the darling wife you know and love, was it? Throwing flatware at servants, throwing tantrums over what she will eat and who she will allow to make it for her. You would be mortified if your children acted like that, correct? So why accept it from the person who is helping you raise them?"

Ren remained steadfast. One occurrence meant nothing. "All I saw was one occurrence of a small child acting like an insufferable brat. True, it was completely and utterly unacceptable, but it doesn't change anything between us."

The witch sighed. "Very well. If one instance is not enough for you, I have plenty of other examples."

Ren folded his arms and glared around the dark plane he had been transported to, searching for some sign of an exit.

"Oh yes, of course. Please, continue to waste my time during an important battle. Don't worry about it. I have all the time in the world."

Nothing. Not a single thing. He paused for another moment. He couldn't sense Pin-Mei. She must have been able to escape the curse.

_Good. At least she's not trapped here too._

"Is our precious Warrior of Thunder ready?"

He had no choice but to go along with it for now, as much as he hated to. "Yes," he grumbled.

The surrounding area materialized into what he recognized as Pin-Mei's room. Pin-Mei herself, again eight, stomped in and tried to slam the door behind her, but Rong caught it and followed her in. He watched as the little girl kept stalking away, finally belly flopping onto her bed.

"My Lady," she said finally. "May I speak to you about the incident which occurred at school today?"

"What about it?" the girl snapped back.

"You may remember your teacher wanted to speak with me when I came to escort you home. She said that you pulled another girl's hair so hard that quite a few strands came out – nearly a lock."

"Yeah, so? She made fun of my shamanninity, and she's been making fun of me since the beginning of school! She deserved it!" Her voice was muffled by her face being down against the mattress.

"Yes, but in addition to that, you threatened to 'hurt her even worse,' if she spoke to you again. Lady Pin-Mei, this isn't the sort of thing you can go around saying whenever you feel like. This may be a small village, but there are still laws that must be obeyed. I guarantee you the elders will not tolerate such violent words, especially from a shaman."

She took out the letter the teacher had given her and gave it a small wave. "Then there's the problem with this note as well." She looked at it again. "'Please return to principal with parent or guardian's signature tomorrow.' I see that your teacher neglected to inform me that you also threw a rock at another girl," she said as she skimmed the rest of the note. "It would seem that this happened on a different day and My Lady disposed of the teacher's note associated with it."

"Yeah, so? What are you gonna do – tell Grandmother?"

Rong's expression hardened even more. "Considering that your teacher requires a guardian's signature to avoid giving you additional detention, yes, I will need to involve Mistress Suo."

At this, Pin-Mei jerked up, whipping her head around to meet the eyes of her servant. Her demeanor completely changed, now giving a nervous smile.

"Hey, Rong…" She slipped off the bed and took small steps toward her, hands innocently behind her back. "Technically, _you're_ my guardian, right? I mean, you guard me and take care of me and everything, so _you_ can sign it can't you? Grandmother doesn't have to know about this. I mean…" She put on her best sad puppy eyes. "You don't want her to hurt me, do you?"

Rong was unfazed. She had been subjected to this act many times before. She wasn't about to fall for it a second time.

"I'm sorry, My Lady, but my seal will not suffice." Pin-Mei's smile instantly vanished. "In this context, 'guardian' means-"

"I know what it means!" her mistress screamed. She swatted at her arm. "I'm not as dumb as you and Grandmother and everyone else think I am!"

Her maidservant didn't react. "I'm sorry to have given you that impression, My Lady," she replied calmly. "I don't think that at all. It's possible to struggle in school but still be very smart, which I believe is the case with you, My Lady. You are very intelligent. It simply is more visible in non-academic areas."

Pin-Mei looked surprised, but quickly tried to regain control. "Who asked you?! G-Get out!"

Ren cocked an eyebrow, his mouth slightly lopsided. _This is so goddamn forced. She really doesn't know how to be a bratty heir._ He stopped. _Wait…_ He paused again, closing his eyes. _What? She's here?! But why couldn't I sense her before?_ He looked around. She was nowhere to be seen, only in the dreamy image Suo had concocted.

He narrowed his eyes. _But where…?_ Without any definite signs that she was nearby, all he could do was continue watching this farce.

Ling, who had come in during Rong's lecture, sheepishly bent down and took a stuffed toy from her mistress's gargantuan pile. "I'm sorry that you had a bad day, Lady Pin-Mei. Here, maybe a hug from Lián will make things a little better?"

Pin-Mei stiffened. She rigidly turned to see her servant holding the plush version of Ren out to her, a hopeful expression on her face. She smiled brightly.

"Thank you, Ling. You're right."

The smile vanished. She snatched the plushie and thrust it to the ground, then began stomping on it with all her might. Her stomps became so hateful that they elicited frantic grunts from her. Ling, eyes wide with shock, subconsciously reached out for the doll. She had worked hard to make Lián for her mistress as a way of quelling the loneliness she had felt upon returning from Tao Castle back when she was four, and to see that hard work being literally trampled on in front of her was devastating.

"I hate you!" Pin-Mei suddenly screamed. "I hate you! I hate you! Stupid! Abandoning me! Not writing to me! Making me think you cared! Just go die!"

Ren was taken aback, to say the least. Pin-Mei had never acted as though their time apart had bothered her so much that she _hated_ him for it. When she gave Lián a particularly hard stomp, he winced. Even in her thirties, Pin-Mei cared for her stuffed toy as if it were a dear friend. It really was a side of her he wasn't used to seeing.

Rong had taken to closing her eyes, waiting for the tantrum to ebb. She didn't even flinch when her mistress grabbed the stuffed toy by its tongari and pitched it full-force into the nearest wall. It whizzed past her head and landed against the wall with a muffled splat, and then fell to the floor. Pin-Mei panted as she stared after it for a few moments. Then she straightened and let out a loud sigh.

"Whattaya know. I really do feel better."

Rong bowed. "I'm happy for you, My Lady."

Pin-Mei turned back to glare at her two servants. Ling had the misfortune of making eye contact with her. Her mistress smiled.

"Oh yeah, you made that for me, didn't you, Ling? I guess it probably made you sad to see that…Next time I'll wait until you leave before I beat the stuffing out of him."

The servant's lip quivered. Obviously she wanted to plead with her not to destroy her work again, but it would be futile. Despite being four years her junior, the little girl's wishes were not to be challenged for any reason – unless it was a direct order from Suo. Rong finally spoke for her.

"Ling is speechless at your kindness, Milady. If she could speak, she would no doubt be thanking you for your consideration of her feelings." She looked to Ling again. The girl was not regaining her composure in the slightest. "If you would excuse her, My Lady, Ling must report to the kitchen to assist with the dinner preparations."

Ling whipped her head around, suddenly alert. She shook her head a couple times, trying not to let Pin-Mei see, mouthing her protests to Rong with teary eyes.

Ren sighed. _I can't say I blame her._

"It's either that or you can stay here and help her with her homework," Rong said in a low voice. Ling looked a bit more disturbed, covering her mouth and shaking her head once more. Rong straightened. "As I said before, Ling is needed in the kitchen. May she leave?"

"Fine."

Ling uncovered her mouth for half a second to whisper, "Thank you," before quickly walking out of the room.

Without missing a beat, Rong continued. "If it is alright with you, My Lady, I will join her for the moment. Then I will return and assist you with your school work for tomorrow."

Pin-Mei's eyes narrowed. "Fine."

"Thank you, My Lady." She bowed and exited the room.

To Ren's surprise, instead of continuing to focus on Pin-Mei, the scene followed Rong out into the hall. She turned a corner, then stopped short.

Ling was slumped, practically huddled, against the wall, her head buried in her arms, sobbing loudly.

"Keep your volume down," Rong warned apathetically. "Only the Great Spirit knows what will happen to you if Lady Pin-Mei or Mistress Suo find you like this."

Ling gave a slight nod, but made no significant effort to stop her tears. A mere twelve years old, she found it hard to simply ignore the abuse Lián had just been subjected to. Her mother had taught her to sew, so she had been making dolls and stuffed animals, as well as clothes for them, since she was six. Due to the contract she had signed, she was rarely awarded time off to see her family, so sewing was one of the ways she would combat her homesickness. She had made Pin-Mei dozens of plush toys in the four years she had been serving her, and the two had often had pleasant conversations about stuffed animals and how they were made. It was only within the last year or so that Pin-Mei had become so enraged and violent every waking moment of nearly every day.

Now, she was shaking. This most recent outburst had sent her over the edge.

"Rong…I can't do this anymore," she said in a pained whisper. "It was fine in the beginning, but these past months, she's just been getting worse and worse! I thought to myself, 'At least she's not as bad as Mistress Suo,' but she's becoming just like her!"

Rong knelt down, looking her in the eye, but offered no physical display of comfort. "Now Ling –"

"Don't tell me you don't see it! She's just as cruel, uncaring, manipulative, and abusive as Mistress Suo!" She grasped Rong's arm. "Please! Help get me released so I can go home to my parents! I can't do this anymore!"

The Wei guard shook her head. "When you signed that contract, you were vowing to devote your entire life to serving Lady Pin-Mei. No matter how miserable you are, the only way you can be released is either by Her word, or your own death."

Ling shook her head. "You're one of the most influential people in this castle – there must be _something_ you can do!"

Rong brushed the hand from her arm and slapped her across the face. "Get ahold of yourself. Even if I could somehow have you released, I wouldn't. I don't believe in allowing people to run from their responsibilities just because their job is not as fun as it used to be."

Ling stared at her with wide eyes. "But you agree with me, don't you? She's growing up to be just like Mistress Suo!"

Rong's gaze didn't waver. "I can see why you would feel that way. I must admit that I see it too. Lady Pin-Mei does seem to be going down that path."

The scene abruptly ended, the two women fading into the darkness.

"Do you see now, Tao Ren?" Suo's disembodied voice chimed. "All along, your precious wife has been following in my footsteps. Even Rong, the servant most loyal and undyingly devoted to her, has admitted as much.

"You only knew her as the sweet, quiet fourteen year-old she was when you reunited. You have no idea of how, by the tender age of eight, just four years after meeting you, she had turned into a rotten apple. Throwing selfish tantrums and mistreating servants must certainly be things you thought were beyond her, yes?"

Ren was trying his best not to react. Yes, Pin-Mei had never showed any signs of this kind of behavior in the years they had been together. True, she would seldom cry as an attempt to sway his position on some things, but that didn't really compare to the outburst he had just witnessed. Mistreating servants? Of course he would never expect that from her.

In his mind's eye, he saw the two of them strolling down one of Tao Castle's many corridors.

_Whenever they passed a servant, he or she would stop what they were doing and give their masters a deep bow of respect. Once the couple had passed them, they would resume their work._

_As they went on, Ren noticed that Pin-Mei had begun to reciprocate the gesture to each one they passed. The next time she tried, he put his hand on her head, exerting just enough pressure to keep it in place._

"_There's no need for you to submit to them. You're of a higher class than they are."_

_She looked up at him, almost confused. "But they do so much for us. If even one of them left, I think we would all feel the effects. Imagine if Bai wasn't here to clean the windows day after day. Wouldn't they become cloudy and unsightly? If Xiao-Dan left, we might have to wash our own clothing. Should Chang-Pu and Zhu leave, we wouldn't have the delicious meals we enjoy every night. Each one of them is an important part of this home. I want to make sure they know that they're appreciated."_

_She looked up to see Rong coming toward them. As they passed each other, Rong gave a deep bow._

"_Mistress Pin-Mei, Master Ren."_

_Pin-Mei silently returned the bow, a grateful smile on her face. When the guard was out of earshot, she sighed softly._

"_If Rong had ever left me when I was a child, I know for a fact that I wouldn't be here today."_

This wasn't the Pin-Mei he knew. It had to be some sort of trick.

"Why should I believe any of this?" he demanded. "I've been with her for more than twenty years, actually paying attention to her and seeing to her needs. You were with her for fourteen and didn't even care enough to find out what her triggers were. How are you going to prove that any of this is true?"

"You do not have much choice, do you? Yes, by now you have been with her longer than I was, but the fact remains that you know nothing of what Pin-Mei was like during the ten years you were apart. Again, with neither Pin-Mei nor Rong here to tell you otherwise, all you have is my word." She fanned herself and batted her eyelashes. "When have I ever lied to you?"

Piercing yellow eyes glared at her. "I'm going to assume that was a rhetorical question."

She gave a shrug of faux innocence. "Such an obsession with details…"

He took a hostile step forward. "The point is that _I_ _know her_. She would _never_ do any of this."

"And I say that you are naïve and a wishful thinker. I have had a hold on her for her entire life," Suo said, her voice reeking of sick satisfaction. "She has hated me the entire time, as she should, but that didn't stop her from becoming like me. She never fully shook off my influence." She vanished and reappeared behind him. With a chuckle, she began thoughtfully pacing in a circle around him, her eyes never leaving him.

"Tell me, when your children were born, and as they grew up, did she seem especially anxious? Mumbling to herself about how she would never be like me? That she would never touch her children with anything other than a loving hand?"

Ren looked away from her.

"Or when Huan appeared and she decided to take her in, did she tell herself that she was doing it to prove that despite the horrors that come with the Qiao family name, and the pain it has caused both your families, she could be kind? That she would not be like me?

"Even if you simply think back to how she was behaving a few minutes ago…I know you sensed her desperation to fight. She said it was Hao she wanted to do battle with, but you and I both know it was supposed to serve as a warning to me. 'I'll get you next,' no? She no doubt wants to tear me apart, limb from limb. How dreadfully violent…"

"She's not the only one," he said in a dark voice. "You made her life hell just as my father did mine. I don't blame her for wanting to skin you alive."

"Oh my…" She laughed behind the fan, then alternated between opening and closing it as she continued circling him. "You may have overcome the hatred you had for your father enough so that you could co-exist with him, but Pin-Mei never had such healing. In her eyes, because you had to help her, it was little more than you exacting revenge on me instead of just her. She has suffered due to your assistance that night."

"And you're so sure because…?"

"Come now, boy, you must know. The mere utterance of my name is enough to make her body so tense that her spine hurts. Anything that could trigger the vaguest memory of my abuse was quickly erased from Tao Castle, was it not? And yet, you must know by now that she still keeps a photo of me with the pages of an old, forgotten book in your study. Oh, the hours she has spent over the years just sitting in her chair staring down at that photo with those dull fish eyes of hers."

Now she turned to face him, a distinct smile on her lips. "I know you haven't forgotten those unfortunate post-traumatic stress episodes she had after you rescued her. Poor boy…those must have been so hard to take…"

Ren tried not to let his face show the horror he felt on the inside as he remembered those brutal nights. Of course he hadn't forgotten, though the GS knows he had tried.

"How admirable for you to stay with her even after finding out how imperfect she really is. But let's be honest: had you known she had these problems, would you have pursued the engagement once I had it annulled? Would you have come to save her? Or would you have simply allowed her to die and become the master ingredient for my revival ritual without putting up any sort of fight?"

Before he could answer –

"Mother, what you showed him was only half the story, and you know it!"

Ren looked up to see Hua stomping out of the darkness. She came to stand before them, her blue eyes narrowed with rage. Suo froze, then used her fan to block her daughter from her sight.

"H-Hua…What a pleasant surprise…I was just showing your precious son-in-law—"

"I know full well what you were doing," the spirit snapped. "Once again, you're showing him a censored version of, 'The Truth,' in an attempt to turn him against Pin-Mei. You even added in this oppressive atmosphere to cloud his mind. It's just like the last time you tried this." She smirked, putting her hands on her hips. "Ren's right, Mother; you need to come up with some new tricks."

Suo rather timidly looked at her. After a few moments, her anxious eyes calmed, and she gave a few fluttering waves of her fan. "Well then, we will have it your way." She snapped her fan shut, but not before affixing a tag to the inside. Still standing about eight feet from Ren, she made a slicing motion with the closed fan as if it were a sword.

Ren's eyes shot open for a mere moment, then closed in pain as he grabbed his head. He staggered, then collapsed to the side. Hua tried her best to catch him, but his weight was too much for her fourteen year-old body to handle. All she could do was slow his fall to the floor. She snapped her head up and glared at her mother.

"What did you do?!" Her voice was sharp.

The witch gave a shaky laugh. "I simply gave you what you asked for. Both of you told me that I should try something new, and now I have. Are you trying to say that you were joking?"

Hua laid Ren on the ground, listening for his breathing. It was normal. She stood and took a step toward Suo. "I asked you what you just did! Answer me!"

Another laugh. "You and I both know one reason why Ren forgives Pin-Mei's faults and foolish – at times selfish – actions is because he compares them to his own past. Of course, they would seem small and insignificant in comparison. What if we took that scale of sorts away, leaving with nothing to compare her deeds to other than his sense of morality? You must admit that the scenes I am about to show him may be a bit too much, yes?"

Hua clenched her fists, her glare becoming more intense. "That's because _you_ distilled that in her! If I…" She bowed her head, almost in shame. "If I had raised her, she never would've done those cruel things. She wouldn't have been so traumatized. She wouldn't have tested Ren so harshly so soon into their relationship." She lifted her head. "Why do you insist on testing him again and again? Do you honestly believe that a day will come when he scoffs at Pin-Mei and finds her no good?"

Suo smiled. "If you are so sure of his love for her, then you should not be at all fazed by the extra precaution I have put in place."

Hua fumed. "You…You…" She charged, a DaDao having materialized in her right hand. When she was close enough, she swung at her.

Suo vanished. Hua stumbled, glaring at the ground where she had been.

"Intimidate me all you like, my darling daughter," her voice echoed over the area. "No one leaves until Ren makes his choice."

She narrowed her eyes in thought. "No one…? Wait, you mean...Pin-Mei's trapped here as well?!"

There was a crude cackle. Hua straightened.

"So let's suppose this farce of yours succeeds and Ren were to reject her, what would happen to her?"

Suo appeared behind her to her left. "Ren is her only way out. If he decides that he is better off without a violent, spoiled brat like her, she will be forever lost in this realm, doomed to wander this plane until she succumbs to the darkness depleting her furyoku."

"You mean she'll die," Hua said in a firm voice.

Suo's eyes lit up, and Hua could tell that behind the fan her smile had widened. Simply hearing Pin-Mei's fate was enough to leave her practically squealing with glee. Her daughter grit her teeth. If Ren didn't choose to ignore his wife's past faults, which admittedly were worse than most people who hadn't lived a life of pain and chaos such as Ren's, he would awake from his trance to find his wife lost forever. The chances of him being able to fight Hao with a clear mind and win would be very small.

_Darn it…If Ren doesn't snap out of it, we're all screwed! I __have__ to make sure Pin-Mei's past doesn't affect his love for her! She was just a child! It's not fair to judge her for what she did!_ She clenched her fists and stared at the ground. _If only I hadn't died. If only I could have raised her myself…None of this would be an issue!_

Ren let out a groggy moan, and she turned her attention back to him. _I won't let Mother tear them apart. I _refuse_ to let that happen after all they've been through._ She ran toward him, getting ready to guide him through the labyrinth of lies Suo no doubt had in store for him.

But before she could reach him, she smacked into a hard surface, and fell backward. After taking a moment to get over the initial shock, she stood. She furtively reached out, her hand hitting an invisible wall. As she realized what was going on, she clenched the hand into a fist, then began pounding on the glass.

"MOTHER! DISSOLVE THIS WALL AT ONCE!"

Suo coyly looked over her shoulder at her. "Why would I do something like that? You might bewitch him like you did last time." She snapped her fan shut, revealing a devilish grin. "Please, Hua, sit back and enjoy the show. Witness the life you doomed your daughter to when you left this world."

Hua glowered at her. She knew her mother's ways – she was honestly trying to blame _her_ for _dying_ during childbirth - a birth which Suo had insisted on.

"I don't regret bringing Pin-Mei into this world, not for an instant," she whispered to herself. "She and Ren have been so happy together. That alone has made my sacrifice worth it." She studied the barrier before her. "I'll find a way around this. I won't let Mother have her way. I did once. Never again."

Meanwhile, Ren sat up, slightly dazed. Once he had finally found his footing, he peered around the area. Still dark. He grabbed his forehead and grit his teeth as a sharp pain shot through his head. It was all he could do to try to ignore it.

_Dammit…What the hell happened? Hua was here and then…_ He looked around, obviously finding she had vanished. He shook it off. _It doesn't matter. The only person I should be worrying about is…_

"Ah, Ren. How nice of you to wake up."

Her voice was as grating as nails on a chalkboard. He glared at her.

"I honestly think you're disappointed I woke up at all." As she advanced toward him, he began slowly sidestepping away from her. No way was he going to be trapped so easily.

She chuckled. "There is really no need to be so cautious. I am not going to attack you – only educate you."

"Well, why don't you 'educate' me a way out? This has been a wonderful waste of time so far."

Suo gave him a Cheshire grin. "Do not worry. I promise that what I am about to show you will pique your interest."

Ren's eyes narrowed even further. "And if I refuse?" Without waiting for an answer, he produced Houraiken and ran at her and gave a tremendous swing.

Suo nonchalantly closed her fan and used it to block the strike. The force he exerted on her made his agitation quite clear. She tried to push back, but she had not anticipated the brute strength the patriarch possessed. Hers being limited, she could barely keep her fan up.

"I would advise against harming me," she said finally, trying to keep a mocking grin on her lips. "This is my realm, after all. Should I lose consciousness –"

"Or die,"

"Yes…or die…You would be trapped in here with no escape. Do you not agree that would be a most undesirable outcome?"

"And yet I find it extremely hard to believe that you're going to release me out of the kindness of your heart."

She sneered. "You do not have a choice. All I ask is that you pay attention to what I wish to show you."

Ren finally relented with an annoyed growl. "I suppose I should let Pin-Mei be the one to send you back to the hell you crawled out of anyway," he said, almost as an afterthought.

She scowled, shooting him a glare before quickly hiding it. _I only have to put up with this lout for a little while longer. Then I can be rid of him and that ragdoll granddaughter of mine for good._ "Shall we?"

Renfolded his arms, reluctant to go along with her plan for obvious reasons. _There has to be something else I can do to force my way out of here_.

But the more he tried to think, the more intense the aching became. It was a stabbing, throbbing pain that only subsided once he had completely abandoned the very thought of escape. For now, he would have to endure whatever convoluted scheme the she-demon had concocted.

He looked up as Suo waved her fan. The area around them took the form of the audience hall of Xu-Fan castle.

SLAP

A fourteen year-old Rong fell to the floor in front of him. She quickly motioned to get up, as if the beating hadn't hurt in the slightest. The male guard before her gave her a swift kick, sending her to ground again. Once more, she got up only to be sent back down again.

When her recoveries weren't half as swift, she was allowed to finally rise. She brushed back her long red hair to reveal red marks on her cheeks. Bruises were already visible on her arms.

_Rong…Who did this?_

"Is this to your satisfaction, Pin-Mei?"

Ren blinked. Before him stood Pin-Mei, no older than eight. Again, she didn't have the warm features he was used to. Her eyes were cold, and there was a perpetual scowl on her face. At the same time, however, she seemed very blank. Empty. As if, despite her expression, she felt nothing toward her servant, nor their current situation.

"No. Do something else. Don't let her get off so easily for losing me," the little girl said darkly.

Ren narrowed his eyes. "Losing her? Rong took much better care of Pin-Mei than that. If she really 'lost' her, then…"

"It is as you fear," Suo said calmly, coming up behind him. She held out her fan, and a ball of light appeared above it. It began playing a scene like a small TV. "Your lovely wife really is a wretch."

Ren squinted at the ball. Inside, Rong and Pin-Mei walked together through the town's crowded marketplace. The little girl was scowling about, pouting and yawning dramatically.

"She seems rather bored, does she not?" Suo said. "You may ask, 'Then why go?' After all, this was just a simple shopping trip." She gave a prideful smirk. "Anything to get away from me. Any sort of brief respite would do, even one as dull as this. However…"

Pin-Mei suddenly darted to the left and into the crowd. Rong snapped her arm out and caught the girl's wrist. Her mistress struggled. Rong wouldn't let go, instead trying to steer her back to the path.

Pin-Mei glared back at her, eyes full of malice.

She bit her.

Rong didn't flinch, but Pin-Mei gave her a kick to the shin and scratched and bit at the hand. Eventually, it was too much for even Rong, and her grip weakened just enough so that the girl could run away.

Ren looked on as Rong cursed, then bolted after her. He looked to the ground and shook his head. "Pin-Mei…_wanted _Rong to be punished? Why would she do something like that?"

"I concur," Suo cooed. "Why harm the admittedly only person in the castle at all concerned for her well-being? Should she not be thanking Rong profusely for taking such good care of her?"

Ren looked back to the young image of his wife. She hadn't so much as twitched.

"Make sure she won't forget me again," she said dully.

Suo's mirage grinned, and gave her some harsh pats on the head with her fan, causing the girl to visibly flinch. "Do not worry, my dear. I know just the thing." She momentarily put her fan in her sleeve and clapped her hands.

A servant rolled out a large iron griddle. Coals were positioned under it, a large fire already burning brightly. There was no ignoring the shade of orange in the center of the griddle itself, either.

Ren eyed it. Inside, he had a hunch as to what this punishment might be. But he didn't want to entertain the idea that Pin-Mei – sweet, loving, hopelessly devoted, overly protective Pin-Mei – would allow this to happen, especially to Rong.

Rong stared at it, emotionless. Suo smirked. "Now, Rong, I have noticed that the days have been getting quite chilly. With such cold temperatures, would it be safe to assume that you would know when the warmth of a child's hand, namely Pin-Mei's, left yours?"

The guard gave a shallow bow. "Yes, Mistress Suo."

The crone put on a face of faux concern. "Is that so? My, my…with this unfortunate occurrence, Rong, I really must question that. You see…" She motion to the frying surface. "I want to make sure that you never forget what warmth against your palm feels like."

Rong's eyes narrowed. It was just like Suo to concoct such a punishment. She locked eyes with Pin-Mei. The little girl seemed hesitant, and Rong knew that her fear of her grandmother would prevent her from speaking out against this crude turn of events.

"Now, Rong, if you would just—"

Without a word, the maid servant approached the griddle and slammed her right palm down on it. Everyone around her looked on with wide eyes. Pin-Mei shuddered. Even Suo seemed mildly taken aback by the bold display. She smiled and turned to her.

"Pay close attention to your grandmother, my dear."

She closed her fan and walked up to the griddle. Without warning, she held it vertically so the blades were pointing at the ground, and slammed it down into the back of the guard's hand.

Rong whipped her head away, eyes closed, trying not to so much as allow her eyebrows to twitch. It was her duty as the Captain of the Guards to uphold the values of the Wei family – the second most important being to never show agony or emotion, no matter how much pain she was in.

Pin-Mei's eyes widened slightly, but otherwise she had no visible reaction. The smell of burnt flesh and blood soon wafted throughout the room, and her nose crinkled at the stench.

Suo grinned down at the sizzling hand. She twisted the blades deeper into the teen's hand before yanking them out with a harsh, jerking motion. Blood splattered, causing the griddle to hiss as it burned up and disintegrated.

"Alright Rong, that will do," she said.

Rong withdrew her hand. It went right back to her side.

"Now, I think if you were apologize we could give your words a bit more credence." The two locked eyes. "Go on, Rong. Beg for forgiveness from your master."

The guard glared at her for a few more moments before dropping to a kowtow in front of the small girl.

"Lady Pin-Mei, I am eternally sorry that I let go of your hand in the market today. I promise that I will never allow the warmth of your hand to leave mine, especially in such a crowded place, ever again." She raised her head just enough to make eye contact with the small child. "I give you my word."

Pin-Mei paused, then scowled again. "GOOD." She looked up at her grandmother with a hopeful smile. The woman returned her gaze for the briefest of moments before using her fan to give her a quick, hard whack on the back.

"Next time, carry out your own punishments instead of making me waste my time doing it for you!" she snapped.

With that, she stalked out. No one, not even Rong or Ling, made a move to comfort the heiress.

"See that?" Suo's voice came as the room faded. "How horrible for such a young child…_She_ came to _me_ asking that I administer Rong's punishment, who, it turns out, was completely innocent. Did you see how no one wanted to nurse that wound I gave her? They hated her back then. All of them. And rightfully so."

Ren was trying to find the words to say to defend his spouse. Harming _Rong_ of all people?

"She was trying to impress you," he said finally. "She just hoped if she imitated you enough that you would accept her." That had to be it. It made enough sense, didn't it?

She appeared before him, shaking her head in pity. "I can see how you would try to take comfort in the fact that maybe this was only a one time occurrence. Sadly, it was not."

"What…?"

Suo snapped her fan shut and placed it over her forehead like a fainting diva. "I was hoping perhaps you would believe me, and I could avoid bringing up this unfortunate event. It causes even me to cringe just a bit."

Ren desperately tried to hide his exasperation. At the moment he felt like his trust in Pin-Mei was like a long, thick rope. He was trying to cling to what he knew about her, but his fogged mind was making it increasingly difficult. Now the rope had been drenched in kerosene. It was getting tougher to hold on.

Suo was ready to that rope aflame.

"Just one more, I promise," she said.

Ren reluctantly turned back to the darkness. Pin-Mei's room was materializing. The little girl was in her bed, and Ling sat on a stool at her bedside, a familiar book in her hands.

"'Far up the street, I looked back. The little old lady was sitting down, rocking with laughter," Ling read. "I couldn't understand these town people. If they weren't staring at a fellow, they were laughing at him.'

"And that's the end of chapter four, My Lady," she finished quietly. She looked up, then gave a small smile. Pin-Mei was fast asleep in her bed, just as she had hoped she would be.

The servant stuck a bookmark in the place where she had left off and set the book on the nightstand beside her. She let out a heavy sigh, then rubbed her eyes. They closed momentarily, but she snapped awake. She used both hands to hit her cheeks, then pinched one in an effort to keep herself awake. Ren watched her tuck the sleeping girl in, and then go to the windows and close the curtains. With another yawn, she trudged over to the doorway.

Her hand ran down the wall to the left of the doorframe. It grazed the light switch, but wasn't forceful enough to bring it down. Ling stumbled out of the room, the light remaining on

The night quickly turned to morning. Pin-Mei was now sitting up, bedhead apparent, and a sour look on her face. She looked up as Rong entered, dragging Ling with her. She tossed her in front of her mistress. The servant stumbled, but avoided falling to the ground completely. She looked up at Pin-Mei with an ashen face.

"G-Good morning, My Lady…What can I do for you?"

Pin-Mei scowled. "You didn't shut my light off last night!" she cried, her voice piercing. "It kept waking me up during the night! Now I'm all sleepy still and I won't be able to concentrate at school!" She smacked her comforter. "I'll bet you did this on purpose! You're still mad that I beat the stuffing out of that stupid doll you gave me!"

Ling was trembling. "N-No! Of course not, My Lady! I would never think of doing something to intentionally harm you! It was an accident! I swear to the gods above and below that I thought I had turned out the light before I left!" She collapsed to her knees, then went even lower for a kowtow. "Please believe me, Lady Pin-Mei! I promise I will never foolishly forget something so important ever again! I beg your forgiveness!"

The heiress stared at her, eyes wide, her mouth slightly agape. But after a few moments, she regained her cold stare.

"That's not good enough! You're going to forget again, I just know it!"

"No, My Lady! I promise I wo-!"

"BE QUIET!" She gave a small huff of agitation. "In order for me to believe you, I need to make sure that you take pric…preco…prem…do things so it won't happen again!"

Ling's eyes were wide as she looked up at her master. "L-Lady Pin-Mei, I-!"

A guard yanked her up by her right wrist while another set a stone table down in front of her.

"W-What?"

Her wrist was slammed onto the stone. A metal latch, not unlike those used in dungeons, was flipped. With a small, 'clank,' her palm was pressed against the cold surface. She tried to struggle free, but found that she could only move her fingers – just barely. Her palm was firmly locked down.

"One of the girls in my class constantly writes notes on her hands," Pin-Mei said listlessly. "She says that it helps her remember things."

Ling began slowly shaking her head, the realization of what her punishment would be dawning her.

Sure enough, one of the guards produced a fountain pen. But the nib did not look at all capable of holding ink. It was simply a long, thin, yet sharp blade. She flailed, desperate to escape this outlandish punishment. It was no use. The lone restraint was enough to prevent her from fleeing.

Ling's eyes shot wide open as she felt the point pierce her. She looked to her hand to see a single stroke carved into it. The pain took a few seconds to register, but she surely felt it. She let out a bloodcurdling scream. Her knees buckled slightly, and she grasped the podium with her left hand for support. Tears peeked from the corners of her eyes and she shut them and grit her teeth to calm herself down. She opened them in time to see the blade moving against her skin once more.

It dug in deep, and she let out another horrible wail. Her body tensed. The pain was mutating into pure shock. She could feel the blood oozing out of her, spilling over the stone. Her head was beginning to feel light. It only got worse as another stroke was sliced into her. The first character wasn't even completed yet.

_I can't do this…I can't…_

Her eyes wandered to Pin-Mei. "Please, My Lady! I'm sorry for the trouble I've caused you! I promise I won't ever upset you again! Please just stop this! Have mercy on me! I'm begging you!"

The little girl was watching the procedure with wide eyes. She said nothing, not even to deny the underling's request.

When Ling realized there was no escaping this torture, she leaned over the stone, trying to stay up as she screamed. Her face grew pale. Finally, she fell to her knees behind the stand, her screams silenced. The carving continued as if nothing had happened.

Ren noticed that the view had shifted so he could no longer see Pin-Mei's face, but thought little of it. He had already seen how uncaring she had been.

Rong stood to the right of the foot of the bed, her eyes closed as if she were using this opportunity to take a snap. Her own right hand was still bandaged from the retribution she had suffered the week before.

When the phrase had been completed, the guards released the cuff which had held Ling's hand in place. Her body slumped to the floor.

The scene cut to Ling studying the phrase that had been forcibly cut into her.

"_I will always remember to turn off My Beloved Lady's light."_

Ren frowned. "Why would she do something like that? It's disproportionate retribution to say the very least." His eyes narrowed in thought. "With Rong I could understand if she thought it didn't hurt because the Wei family's guards are conditioned to ignore pain. But Ling was _screaming and pleading_ with her to stop. And she wouldn't. How could she do something that inhumane? That's not the Pin-Mei I know at all."

Suo made a small sound of sympathy. "I understand that this must be so shocking to you, Ren. After all, she has presented herself as a model partner and wife all these years… But who is to say that these violent tendencies do not still show up every now and then? Has your family really been safe? Especially when left alone with her?"

He turned away from her, trying to rationalize what he had witnessed. "But she hasn't been violent at all since we've been together," he said, just as much to himself as to her. "You're grasping at straws."

She came up beside him, her fan fluttering. "Am I? Surely you remember those nights…"

Ren grabbed his head as the sounds of her screaming at him, the breaking of porcelain, the slamming of her bedroom door possessed his senses. He could see it all, clear as day, as if it had happened mere moments before. It had been nearly twenty-five years.

_She shoved him. "Just stay away from me! __You have no idea what I've been through!__ How could you even begin to understand what I'm feeling?!"_

_All he could do was look away from her. He wanted little more than to tell her off, to tell her that he had been through just as much, if not more, than she had, but letting his anger out while she was already hysterical was a landmine, and he knew stepping on it would accomplish nothing. He only looked up once she had run into her room, slamming the door as hard as she possibly could._

"I know you remember how awful they were."

"_Stop it! JUST STOP IT! You don't know anything! You don't care at all!"_

_She picked up a porcelain tiger on the night stand and launched it at him. Ren inched to his left in time to avoid it. The figure smashed against the wall. Pin-Mei collapsed to the ground, huddled, and sobbed. _

"It was all just so unfair, what she put you through…"

"_I'm really excited for this banquet! We finally get a do-over!" she exclaimed. _

"_Well, you pleaded, and my father felt guilty for his stupidity in breaking the engagement in the first place, so he figured he owed it to us."_

"_Hehe, yay!" She tilted her head and tried to touch his hair, which had once again been tamed for the sake of looking formal. "You even let them do your hair again! Aww, it really is nice to see you like this every once in a wh-"_

_SHRAP_

_She froze. Her eyes filled with horror and her smile instantly vanished. She whirled around to see that a servant was absent mindedly playing with one of the decorative fans which were being hung on the walls. With small flicks of the wrist, he opened and closed it._

_SHRAP_

_She began shaking her head._

_SHRAP_

_SHRAP_

_Ren looked down at her, then at the servant. _

_SHRAP_

_SHRAP_

_SHRAP_

_Her body trembled and small whimpers left her, getting progressively louder. He shoved past her, stomping over to the servant and snatching the fan from him. The servant stared at him, surprised and confused._

"_Who told you to put these up?" Ren asked, trying to mask his anger._

"_Master En simply told us to decorate the halls, and these are traditionally what we have used to garnish the castle, so we…"_

"_We won't be using them. Find something else."_

"_With all due respect, Lord Ren, these have been in the Tao Family for years and—"_

"_I DON'T CARE. TAKE THEM DOWN! Throw them out! Burn them! Whatever you need to do in order to make sure Pin-Mei never has to look at them!"_

"_Y-Yes, My Lord!" _

_Pin-Mei let out a shriek and he quickly turned back to her. She had fallen to her knees where he had left her. Her eyes were wild, and she had covered her ears. It looked like she was pushing them against her skull as hard as she could. Almost like she was hoping they would melt back into her head._

_Ren ran back to her, quickly kneeling down. "It's okay, they're going to put them away. You won't hear that sound again."_

_SHRAP_

_Her eyes filled with even more terror, her face completely pale. He whipped around to the servants again. They froze, one standing on a ladder and handing one of the large golden fans to the other below._

"_I-I can't do this…" Pin-Mei got to her feet and began running for the stairs. She stumbled a number of times, and it was only Ren quickly grasping her arm that prevented her from falling up them._

_In their room, he sat her down on their bed. She refused to calm down. He grabbed her by her shoulders, shaking her. _

"_Pin-Mei, she's not here. She's gone. Dead," he said, trying to soften his normally harsh voice in an attempt to soothe her. "We dismembered her body, remember? Buried the pieces in different areas, tossed some into the sea for the fish. __She's not coming back.__"_

_Pin-Mei shook her head furiously. She clutched her head, her teeth chattering. "I heard her fan…She's here somewhere…She's…going to get me…" Her eyes widened even more, telling him that she was already seeing the dastard's face in her mind. "She's going to get me! I didn't kill her! She's going to get me!"_

_He shook her again. "Pin-Mei, _you_ got _her_. I saw it with my own two eyes. Right up the middle of her torso, then cut her in half. There's no way she could come back from that. You fucking killed her. You never need to worry about her again."_

"_B-But…The f-fan…"_

"_It was just the servants-"_

"_NO! THAT'S THE SAME SOUND HER FAN MADE RIGHT BEFORE SHE'D BEAT ME WITH IT! I KNOW WHAT I HEARD! WHY DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME?!"_

_Ren tried to stay calm. "Pin-Mei, if I thought there was anything to be afraid of, I would be doing everything in my power to protect you. But you're overreacting. There's no reason for you to be this upset." He lifted his arm slightly, signaling for her to come closer to him._

_She latched onto him, her nails digging deep into his arms._

"_OW! Hey!"_

_She jerked away, trembling. His booming voice was echoing in her ears, driving her insane. She looked up at him as if he were a stranger, someone she couldn't trust. Ren sighed and pulled her back against him. He could feel her heart racing._

"_Clam down," he said firmly. His left hand rested on her back, perhaps too roughly. She flailed and pushed him away._

_Her eyes darted about the room, searching for a way out. She scampered to the edge of the bed on her hands and knees. As she started to fall face first onto the ground, he grabbed her by the sash holding her hanfu together. _

"_What the hell are you _doing_?!"_

_Stitches ripped as she continued to fight him. The dress unraveled, and Ren fisted the back of the robe to try to pull her back up. Again, she looked back at him like a frightened child, tears streaming down her face._

"_R…Rong…RONG!"_

_The guard burst in. After quickly surveying the situation, she ran to Pin-Mei._

"_Ren. Let go of her." Her voice was cold._

_He did, more out of perplexity than anything else. The scion watched his fiancée crawl into her friend's lap and collapse on top of her._

"_Rong...I heard her fan…That noise it makes…She's coming back…She's going to get me…" She wrapped her arms around Rong's waist, her wails unrelenting._

_Rong's eyes softened. She embraced her, careful not to touch her back._

"_It's all right, Pin-Mei," she said in a soft voice. "You're safe now. Ren and I won't let anything happen to you. We'll protect you from Suo until our bodies turn to dust." Her scarlet eyes trailed up to meet his gold, confused ones. "We promise."_

"And after Rong ran off with your Ainu friend, you had to deal with her little outbursts on your own, did you not? Poor boy…It was like a bait and switch, yes? Presenting herself as the perfect wife, only to turn out to be damaged goods inside."

"SHUT UP! They eventually stopped! By Christmas, she was fine! She wasn't as bad…"

"Such trying times," the witch whispered. "After all you had done for her, she touched you with such anger, screamed at you, even broke your property…Surely you must have asked yourself, 'Was any of that necessary? Was this really worth it?'"

"It wasn't her fault!" he yelled. His head was throbbing again. It was difficult to sort his thoughts enough to rebuke everything she was saying.

She smiled knowingly. "Her violent tendencies still exist, do they not? You mentioned she killed Huan…Tell me, how did she do it? Quick and painless so she could get it over with, or was it calculated, slow and agonizing?"

Ren tried not to let her see his eyes widen.

"And that was mere hours ago. It would seem that my influence lives on even today." She made a weak attempt to bury a chuckle. "Now…in light of all this new information, I would understand if your perception of her had changed. Though it may seem drastic, I am going to offer you a choice."

A fourteen year-old Pin-Mei appeared before him. Her head was down, her face a mere shadow. Just seeing her after all these things he had learned about her made Ren feel rather uncomfortable. Suo sneered.

"You can choose to carry on this duplicitous relationship, or you can simply walk away. You can start over from when she left you - young and free to choose a new path in life."

His head pulsed again.

_There's something missing…This shouldn't be all there is to it. This can't be all a surprise to me. But…_

Every time he tried to break things down and piece them back together rationally, there was a huge wall that prevented him from connecting the dots. The only thoughts he was allowed to have were pure poison.

_Why did she do that? How could she be so cold-hearted to the only people who were looking out for her? Has she been that cruel to our servants? Our children? How could I let someone like that into my home? _

_Should I…really have banished her this morning? _

_Should I have bothered rescuing her at all after Suo took her away?_

There was a crash, like glass shattering, then an angry grunt.

"For someone who graduated at the top of his class, you sure are a fucking idiot!"


End file.
